


Babysitting

by thisisonlineright



Series: Babysitting [2]
Category: The Big Bang Theory (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Eventual Shenny, F/M, Family Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-27
Updated: 2014-12-20
Packaged: 2018-02-22 20:10:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 302,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2520260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisisonlineright/pseuds/thisisonlineright
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dr. Sheldon Cooper was one of the greatest minds of his time; had two doctorates, an IQ of 187, a long list of accomplishments, and was at the top of his career. So, why was he stuck babysitting children he didn't even know?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. First Meetings

**Author's Note:**

> Imported from Fanfiction cause FF sucks.

**This specific chapter has been redone several times, in three different years! 2012, 2013 and 2014! You'd think that this story had been waiting for three long years, but really, I only came up with the idea in like end 2012, and now it's finally ready to see the world. I am bit proud, to be honest.**

**Assumed past-Shenny and eventual Shenny.**

* * *

She lifted her hand to the door, knocking nine times.

Penny looked around the familiar hallway, recalling each and every memory she had there, all of the good and bad ones, they were all special to her. Absolutely nothing had changed; even the elevator was still broken, just like two years ago.

"Two  _long_  years," she whispered to herself.

Two years had flown by so quickly and everything seemed like it was just like yesterday. Like it was still the time when she lived in the opposite apartment,  _before_  she left Pasadena for good. It wasn't easy, to leave everything behind and move out to Nebraska, but she did. She left her job at the Factory, her friends—her whole life. She didn't want to, but she had to, and so she did. She needed a fresh start, a whole new outlook on life that wasn't caused by buying a new skirt or a cute top. She needed to grow up, and that was exactly what she went through in Nebraska. Then, a year later, her agent called her saying that some director was interested in starring her in a new show. She had originally thought that the show was just a hoax and was actually porn, but when the director personally called her, she didn't need a second thought and flew back to California.

The show was a 'dramedy' called  _Halfway There_. The story was about a woman, who was terribly cruel her whole life, that dies in an accident and is sent to hell. Once there, she begs for her life back, and due to a misunderstanding, she returns to Earth. Since it could not be undone, the person in charge tells her that there is a catch to her returning. She would be an entirely different person, with a different name and would have few memories of her past life. Then, unbeknownst to her character, she has to make up for all the bad things she did to people, as well as help other "lost" souls like herself. She thought that it was kind of a ripped off version of the movie,  _Chances Are_ , and the show,  _My Name Is Earl_ , combined, but once she saw the storyline, she realized that it was nothing like it, and loved the story.

The entire cast and crew thought that the show wasn't going to get picked up, but much to their surprise, the show was a hit. The first two episodes created a buzz online and were constantly praised by critics and viewers. They said that the story was fresh, that the production was great and that the actors were brilliant. Barely five episodes later, she became famous online, and on television. Like a household name, except less famous.  _Halfway There_  had even received nominations at the Emmys; Outstanding Drama series, Outstanding Writing for a Drama Series, and,  _Outstanding Lead Actress_. When the crew had told her about her nomination, she had fainted from excitement, and up to this day, she still couldn't believe that she was recognized as an actress. It was more than a dream to get recognized by the Emmy committee, and she was excited to go- but, she couldn't.

Which brought her back to the reason she was back at 2311 Los Robles.

She was flying to France in five hours to shoot her first movie—an action-thriller called  _Hindsight_  that was set in a timeline that fused the present and the past. It was about an international super spy hunting down a traitor for spilling the CIA's secrets to the KGB. Unbeknownst to the spy, it was his daughter who was betraying the CIA.  _She_  was playing the international super spy's daughter, who had been betraying her father from the start, and was a double agent with a hidden agenda. Penny was extra nervous on shooting her first movie, but she was excited as well. The movie had a big budget and an all-star cast, who were all A-listers. She was probably the least famous in the cast, but her being in the movie alone was good enough for her. There were also three more movies lined up for her, and she couldn't help but think that her dreams were finally coming true.

She was deemed, "the Penny who changed Hollywood," and was considered as one of the stars to look out for. She starred in a critically acclaimed show, was nominated in the  _Emmys_  and was starring in a highly anticipated movie. She was a lot of years away from a star on the Walk of Fame, but she was living the dream. She wouldn't ever had thought that her life would be this great. She was no longer Penny, the waitress that had no money to pay for the bills, or the Penny that had a car that was a few more seconds to dying or the Penny who only had baking soda in her fridge. No, she was now  _Penny_ , the Emmy nominated actress.

… and a mother to one and a half year old twins.

Penny looked down after feeling someone tugging on her skirt.

"Mommy, wat do hewe?" Maddison asked, a tiny hand reaching up to rub her eye. Penny crouched down, patting the top of her blonde head. "This is where Uncle Leonard lives." The toddler nodded, turning to her twin, Andrew, who had plopped down on the floor, a deep frown on his face. "Mommy, Andy want eat."

"Don't worry, this won't take long. We just have to get you settled before mommy leaves." Penny smiled at her son before standing up as the door opened.

"Penny?"

* * *

"I swear if Kripke hides my files one last time, I will  _obliterate_  him." Sheldon hissed as Leonard kept on glancing at the clock.

"Are you even listening to me?" There was a knock on the door, and Leonard knew who it was. "Fine, if you won't listen to me then don't, but please bear in mind that this will be reflected in the next roommate performance review. I'll get the door while you ponder on whether or not you should get a hearing aid," the theoretical physicist huffed, making his way to the door. Sometimes, he just wanted to reprogram his tiny roommate if he could get hold of the various illegal equipment needed for a successful whole body operation. He'd even be so kind as to add a chip that removed lactose intolerance, and his roommate's sad desire to please everyone around him. But that would only be  _after_  he removed all of his undesirable traits.

With a raised eyebrow, he opened the door and found his eyes widening.

"Penny?" He blinked at the hallucination in front of him, then fainted.

"Leonard, oh my god!" Penny yelped as Sheldon hit the floor. Leonard scrambled from his desk, crouching down beside Sheldon, before grabbing his hands and dragging the unconscious physicist over to the couch. "Is he alright?" The blonde asked, poking the edge of her shoes on Sheldon's chest.

"Yeah, he's breathing," Leonard answered in relief as he removed his fingers from Sheldon's pulse. "What did you do to stimulate such a reaction from him?"

The blonde crossed her arms, tilting her head to the side as her twins slowly crept towards Sheldon. "Honestly? Nothing. I didn't even say anything, and he just fainted." She watched as Andy poked Sheldon with a stubby finger while Maddie looked around the apartment. "Wait, did you even tell him that I was coming over to drop the twins off?" Leonard stared at her, and Penny bared her teeth in irritation. "Did you even tell him that you were going to look after the twins?" Leonard gave Penny an apologetic grin, and winced when Penny angrily hissed, declaring that he fix Sheldon while she brought the twins' things up.

About a month ago, Penny had called him to have lunch together. She had told him about the new movie she was doing, and that she was going to be gone for just two months since the rest of the movie would be shot in California. She also asked him if he could babysit the twins while she was off shooting her movie, because—due to various odd reasons—he was the only one she could trust with them. Leonard was glad to hear about her doing her first-ever movie; he, Raj and Howard had been supporting Penny's acting career since the first time they saw her in the preview of her show. They never missed an episode, and constantly supported her online. They were even members of her fan club. Though he had gotten depressed when she had crushed his heart, he didn't hesitate to come when Penny asked him to meet her a few months after she had left California. He was ecstatic when he first saw her, and was so glad to see her again—then, he saw her pregnant belly and all hell broke loose. It took two hours of explanations from Penny, and a catharsis of anger at the arcade near the restaurant they ate at, for him to finally understand and move on from Penny.

Starting that day, he spoke to her on a daily basis, even after her pregnancy when she moved back to California—though it was getting harder and harder for Penny to do that with her busy schedule—and had grown familiar to Penny's twins. They even called him Uncle  _Wenad_  when they learned to talk and it wasn't long until Raj—who stalked him after work—met with Penny again, and became acquainted with the twins. Raj was a big fan of Penny's show—which had just started at the time—and had never gave up hope that he'd meet with his close friend again. Raj was actually the one who had started the fan club when he heard that Penny was going to star in 'Halfway There.' Even Howard and Bernadette eventually got to catch up with Penny, and met the twins, and they all normally went out for lunch whenever Penny was free. There was only one person who constantly refused to go with them. One person who never failed in expressing his contempt for Penny, and absolute refusal in hearing about anything regarding Penny.

Sheldon.

Ever since the day that Penny left—and she had broken her promise of driving him to the mall—Sheldon had grown cold towards Penny. He complained whenever they mentioned her name, and ranted whenever they watched her show. It was safe to say that Sheldon flat out hated her, and it was still a mystery as to why he did. He didn't even know why Sheldon would hate her, since she  _technically_  did nothing wrong. But Sheldon did, and each time they tried and begged for him to join them for lunch with Penny, he angrily protested and gave them all a strike. They never invited him again, and it never bothered his roommate that he was the only one no longer interacting with Penny. Raj had thought that it was such a shame, especially since the shared such a special  _bond_  and had brought it to himself to inform Sheldon on Penny's social life. During silence that occurred while they ate, Raj would tell them about what Penny was said to do in those gossip shows he loved, and Sheldon always ignored him. Sheldon literally chose not to have anything to do with Penny, and it got his curiosity. Because if anyone should be mad at Penny, it would be him. Not Sheldon. But that was in the past.

They never did got a chance to tell Sheldon that Penny had kids.

So, when Penny asked Leonard if it would be okay for the twins to stay at their apartment for the time being, he didn't hesitate to say yes.

"—those are their carseats, I placed their things in your room and I sent you an e-mail of their schedule and preferred food." Penny told him as she roamed around the room, checking if she had brought everything up. "Do you think that you can put some safety bumpers? Your apartment is literally a death trap, and I can write you a blank cheque for whatever the twins need."

Leonard shook his head, placing a plate of cookies on the coffee table for the twins to eat. "No, you don't have to worry about anything. I don't think that those bumpers will cost a lot, and I'm sure Howard can whip up something even more safe than wall guards. Plus, Raj won't waste a second without spoiling these two."

Penny frowned at the sight of her twins munching on the cookies. "I can barely get them to eat anything green or funny looking, and now you're feeding them cookies?" She gave Andy a stern look, and the toddler simply shrugged and continued eating. "And please don't let Raj spoil them too much. I know he loves the two, but I won't be able to meet their expectations when Raj practically offers to buy them a pony! Or to feed them every single sweet tasting food in the planet!" Leonard chuckled, grabbing a cookie and taking a bite of it while eyeing the still unconscious Sheldon slumped against the couch. "The Penny I know from two years ago would have finished that plate of cookies all alone. Now, you're mad at the sight of it! My, things have changed."

"Keep that up and I'll shove that plate down your throat," the blonde warned, taking another glance around the apartment. "Penny, are you really sure that leaving the twins here is a good idea? It's just that, do you really think that Sheldon and I will be able to take care of them? I'll be okay with doing it, since I've practically been babysitting Sheldon for years now, but can you really trust Sheldon for this? He might ship the twins off to Antarctica or something." Penny sighed, rubbing her temples as she finally understood what Leonard was implying. "Oh, I think I trust Sheldon  _way_  too much. You know that I need to do this, and that I owe it to the twins. Wait, why are you even questioning my decision when you're the one who suggested that I do this?"

Leonard shrugged, "just wanted to double check. Hey, are you sure you have all of the twins' things in my room? You'll need to get to the airport in a few."

"Oh right, let me just go and check," Penny nodded, glancing at her watch then heading to Leonard's room. Right as Penny disappeared, Sheldon's eyes flew open—scaring both Leonard and the twins.

Sheldon slowly sat up, Leonard looming over him with a look of concern as he rubbed the back of his head. "Buddy, are you okay?" He nodded, narrowing his eyes at what he thought he saw. He saw Penny,  _alive_ , and two brats who looked a lot like her. He hadn't heard from Penny since she left, and had decided to sever any connection with her. If he was still her friend, she would have at least replied to his monthly update e-mail. He sometimes heard about her from Raj, that she had become a star, but he didn't care. The non-written friendship agreement declares that, if a friend shall leave the state, he or she must at least inform the other friend, and say goodbye. She broke that, and he found no reason to know about her life. He had lost all respect for their former neighbor the moment that she broke his trust. She didn't deserve his friendship, or his time or day, or a .1 kb amount of space in his mind.

"I thought I saw Penny," he told his roommate, placing a hand on his forehead. It must have been the orange chicken that made him hallucinate. He needed to cut back on the fake tangerine chicken that Raj kept on insisting was real. "She had two miniature versions of herself and I think my spontaneous decision of changing our eating schedule has fired back." Leonard sighed in relief before standing up—why was he slouched against the couch?—and extended a hand out to Sheldon. "Um, about that... Penny is here. With her twins. But she's leaving for Paris. And we're going to babysit for her while she's gone. Want some dessert? We can go out if you want some." Sheldon frowned as he deciphered what Leonard's stammering translated to. Then, as if to prove a point, two tiny humans wobbled over to him, staring at him with large, sky blue eyes.

"Who dat?"

"Dat Sedon."

"Oh! Why he on floh?"

"Dunno."

"Leonard," he slowly said, sending Leonard's extended hand a glare. "What is the meaning of this?" Sheldon gritted his teeth as he stood, glaring down at his roommate. "They're, um, Andy and Maddie, they're Penny's kids, and she's, uh, going to France... So, I volunteered on babysitting for her?"

"You  _what?_ " That was it. Sheldon didn't care if the children would cry or get traumatized for the rest of their lives; he was mad and Leonard deserved reprimanding. He, himself, hated shouting and fighting, but sometimes he just couldn't help it when your roommate is  _this_  infuriating. "You took in two strangers,  _without_  my permission, and expect me to just accept this?!" The experimental physicist nervously wrung his hands, "they're not strangers, they're Penny's ki—"

"Penny?! Who is she who shall not be named? The person we decided is banned from this apartment for breaking every friendship rule there is? The traitor who just went up and left? Tell me, how you plan on getting me to agree to this, Leonard. Because I am  _very_  interested in your explanation!" Sheldon was fuming, and Leonard knew it. They had an unspoken rule of never allowing Penny to return to the apartment, ever. Penny was worse than Benedict Arnold, Judas, Darth Vader and Rupert Murdoch, the guy who cancelled Firefly, on his list of traitors. It took a lot for him to accommodate Penny into his life, and it didn't take a second for her to just disregard all of them out of hers. "Well, uh, it's cause I, uh..."

"Leonard, let me handle this." Sheldon snapped his head towards the hall to their rooms, where Penny stood. " _You_ , how dare you return here like you never broke our trust!"

The blonde had a tight frown on her face, and her arms crossed across her chest—that was what Penny normally looked like whenever she was unimpressed with him. Sheldon didn't care if she had once been his friend, the fact remained that she broke his trust, and that was unforgivable. Just a day before she vanished, she had promised him that she would take him shopping for one of the tenured professor's birthday. Then, she left without a single word, and he was the only one who didn't have a gift for the retiring professor. He had given her fifteen strikes for it, then Leonard told him that she left. For good. It took him awhile to find out if he had done anything to offend her by suggesting the shopping trip, but he found himself not at fault. It was  _Penny_  who had a problem, not him. He did not miss her when she left, but he did find her absence noticeable. Mostly due to mainly relying on Leonard for transportation. Unlike when Penny had been present to drive him everywhere, Leonard usually threatened to make him ride the bus.

The first month of Penny's absence was unbearable for him, with Leonard constantly crying and singing to Alannis Morisette's 'You Oughta Know' and asking him what he did wrong—which was a lot. Even Howard and Raj got weepy, but he did not falter his cold stand on the matter of the backstabbing, traitor named Penny. Though he somewhat missed having someone to show his superiority to, he had been returned to being the best HALO player in their group. Had Penny still been there, he would be the second best, and that was not good. However, as the months dragged on; Leonard suddenly stopped talking to him and even disappeared for a week during the fifth month of Penny's absence. When he returned, he ignored him for quite a while, then suddenly reverted back to normal without any reason whatsoever.

Plus, right after Penny's departure, Raj told him that it was customary for former friends to e-mail each other with all of the anger and appreciation one ever had for the other. Since it was social protocol, he secretly did what Raj told him to do. He sent her e-mails weekly for an entire month—aside from the monthly one he sent everyone—but she never replied. Not a single one was answered, and that led him to remove anything Penny reminiscent in his life. He even almost dispatched Leonard, but he needed him for doing his tedious tasks.

"I know you're mad," Penny started, walking over to where they stood. "But I had my reasons, and you have to respect that."

"Respect what?" Sheldon scoffed angrily, and for some unknown reason, he felt a twinge of pain on his wrist. "Penny, you promised to accompany me to the mall to get a gift for Professor Lancaster. I was the only one without a gift—even  _Wolowitz_  had a gift, and they've never even met. Do you know how embarrassed I was?"

"Sheldon, let it go," Leonard pleaded beside him, the brats hiding behind his roommate's legs. "That's over and done with, and was two years ago. Professor Lancaster didn't even care!" The physicist turned to his roommate, his face twitching in anger. "He cared. I saw how his smile diminished when he learned that I did not have a gift, and you know it." Sheldon turned back to Penny, he wasn't done with her. He certainly was not done with her. "Did you know that I was the laughing stock of the physics department,  _for the third time_? It has even come to my realization that you were the cause of all of the disgrace I have ever endured! Are you happy to hear about my demise,  _bane_  of my existence?"

The blonde released something close to a growl, and Sheldon did not back down, preparing himself for any acts of violence that Penny would do. He had played this game many times before, and even if Penny called his mother, he would not let her win. He had already knuckled under for her so many times before that he had had enough. "You know what? Fine! I'm sorry, okay! Sorry that you didn't get your  _stupid_  gift. Sorry that I ruined your life, yet again! Sorry that I always ruin your stupid reputation! Sorry that I'm  _always_  the cause of your misery!" Penny was seething and Leonard had an overtly concerned expression, but Sheldon merely snickered. It was the truth and Penny had to face the fact that she was the biggest nuisance in his life. "There, I apologized. Are you happy now?"

"Hardly," Sheldon snorted and he swore that Penny was about to strangle him. Instead she huffed, bent down to kiss the brats on their foreheads and sent him a vicious glare that he'd seen many times before. "Whatever, I'm leaving. Unlike  _you_  spiteful ba-" Leonard rapidly shook his head, pointing to the brats, "- _beast_ , I have somewhere to be, and something more important to do!" She faced Leonard, giving him a small, strangled smile. "Thanks again for doing this." He smiled back then Penny turned back to Sheldon, growled then stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door.

"I'm glad that she's gone!" Sheldon exclaimed, sending the door an angry look as if Penny was still there. Her mere presence had ruined his day, and he had been excited all day for Star Wars; Clone Wars night. Curse her and her hobby of ruining his life. "People like her should stay away from our fortress of solitude for good. She had brought nothing but an endless amount of problems into this apartment, and it is high time that we put an end to her terrorizing ways! To think that she even brought those brats with her! The nerve!" He shook his head in disbelief before marching to his desk and prying his laptop open. "Thank goodness she took those brats with her! I won't be able to withhold my anger if she had left them here as if we were some sort of daycare center. The nerve of that woman."

Sheldon triumphantly grinned as he heard Leonard settle on the couch. He must feel defeated; he wouldn't allow Penny to once again soil their lives. How dare she even bring her offsprings with who-knows-who here! How dare she even think that she could just leave them here in the apartment where he had spent so many hours ensuring that it was pristine! Children brought in germs, especially stranger's children that could have picked up strange diseases from god knows where. Leonard probably thought of it as another attempt for him to win Penny back.  _Foolish_ , he thought. He shouldn't have been surprised that Leonard would do anything to get Penny to love him again; he did that all the time. It never worked, and Leonard never learned. Now that she had offsprings, that idea was even more unlikely. As well as his idea of having "beautiful and smart" progenies with her. He let out a laugh, Leonard was too foolish. They would always be imaginary.

"Sedon mad?"

"Maddie tink so."

"He scawy."

"He mean."

Sheldon's features hardened, and he swore that he could hear unintelligent voices chatting.

"Why Sedon mad?"

"Dunno."

"Not wike Uncah Wenad."

"Uncah Wenad fun."

Sheldon peered over his shoulder, and found the  _brats_  sitting in the middle of the couch. They were nibbling on cookies, and he had a strong urge to viciously scold them and obliterate  _Leonard_. Those were  _his_  cookies, that they bought for watching Star Wars: Clone Wars—not for germ infested, unfamiliar, un-welcomed, feebleminded crawlers! "LEONARD!" He bolted from his chair, and spun around to face the kitchen where Leonard stood. "What are they still doing here?!" The bespectacled man blinked, placing the bottles of milk down on the counter. Bottles! They couldn't even drink from a glass yet! Preposterous! "I told you, we're babysitting for Penny. She'll be gone for two months, and doesn't trust anyone to watch over the twins."

"Why doesn't she just leave them with her parents in Nebraska? Or with her friends that  _aren't_  us? Didn't you say that she was famous, now? Can't she hire someone?" Leonard sighed, lifting the bottles and making his way to where the  _brats_  were. He handed one to each of them. "Something about her dad feeding them too much corn. Her friends are all busy, and have no experience with children. The last babysitter she hired stole some of her things and sold them on eBay, you can check. It's actually pretty surprising to see that Penny's used nail polish costs about a hundred bucks." Sheldon felt anger boiling up inside him, he really had to stay away from Leonard's schemes. They never ended well. " _We_  don't have any experience with children, as well!" Sheldon shrieked at his roommate. "If this is another one of your ploys to get Penny to get back with you, I want no part of it!"

Leonard scrunched his face in distaste, "it is not! I'm doing this because I'm her friend, and you are, too!"

"I believe we stopped being friends the moment she neglected her duties and left us for good." He was seething as he glanced at the brats on  _his_  couch. Their resemblance to Penny was astonishing, and even had the same mannerisms as her. They both had golden blonde hair, big, blue eyes—Penny had green eyes, but theirs might lighten into the same shade as they grew up—and both sported that clueless look Penny always had on. The boy was cluelessly staring at him as he ate the cookie, while the girl ignored him.  _Very Penny_ , he mused to himself as he observed the brats again. How were they supposed to deal with children that they've never even met? He had never had any experience with children, and had always despised their every being. Babies were noisy, pooping, slobbering messes, and these two were probably no different. There were two! One child was hard enough, what would they do with another one?

"I know what you're thinking, Sheldon," Leonard spoke, glancing at the brats. "You're thinking that we can't take them in, and that we should return them. Sheldon, they're kids, not dogs! We can't just put them in a box and leave them somewhere!" Sheldon pursed his lips, that could easily be arranged; the brats were small enough to be placed in a box. Maybe even a large box for them to move in, since he was such a kind person. Leonard, noticing that his roommate was seriously considering the idea, leapt to his feet. "We are  _not_  putting them in a box!"

Sheldon held his hands up in defense, "that wasn't what I was thinking about."

"Then what were you thinking about?"

"That we could leave them in an  _orphanage_ , and that Penny wouldn't notice." The physicist sardonically smiled as Leonard groaned in frustration. "We're not leaving them in an orphanage! We are  _not_  throwing them away, do you understand? We will take care of them, whether you like it or not!" Sheldon scowled down at his improbable roommate who was far too persistent on insisting that the brats stay here in their apartment. He had a feeling that this really was just a ploy to get Penny back, and that this would have disastrous results. Leonard's plans always ended badly, and it was always he who was there to witness each and every one of them. Sheldon felt an odd sense of amusement whenever one of Leonard's desperate attempts at wooing Penny crashed and burned. It was great to know that he had been right from the very start—that Leonard and Penny would  _never_  work.

It would be remarkable if he once again proved that this new attempt of Leonard's would end the same way the others did—sad, miserable and much to Leonard's pathetic dismay. He might even be able to prove his theory that Leonard's plans always ended badly, whatever the goal was.

With a huff, Sheldon turned and stormed to his desk; he would watch from the sidelines as this plan went up in smoke. He'd make sure that he would be the one to say the much deserved I told you so. Maybe when this train has run it's track, Leonard will finally learn his lesson and understand that his relationship with Penny is futile and that Penny is nothing but trouble. Leonard should be happy to have him as his roommate; he was such a good friend. "Fine, but you're taking care of them, and it is  _your_  time that will be wasted. I expect that you won't mess up my routine, Leonard. Or else they  _will_ be placed in a box and be sent off to Madagascar." He heard Leonard sigh in relief as he grabbed a clipboard and a pen from a drawer, then swiveled his chair to face Leonard. His roommate was sitting at the end of the couch, beside the two brats. "But first, I have several questions I must ask before completely allowing you to push through with this asinine plan of yours."

The male brat—Andy—craned his neck to look at Leonard. "Uncah Wenad, wat as... asni... asnin?" Sheldon chuckled in disapproval; they were just like their mother!

"Uh, it means funny, and don't use that word, it's bad." Leonard explained, causing the brat to nod and loudly whisper to the female brat—Maddie—that 'asnin' was bad. "And don't look so condescending, Sheldon! They're a year and half, they're not supposed to know what asinine means!" The bespectacled man turned back to the brats, who each had a hand covering their mouths from hearing the bad word, and shook his head. "Don't use that word. So, Sheldon, what were the questions you were going to ask me?"

He raised an eyebrow, clicking his pen as he scribbled the brats' names on the paper. "Yes, now, first question; what is their exact birthdate?" Sheldon paused, pursing his lips in thought, "or birth  _dates_ , if Penny had given birth to the second brat at midnight."

Leonard frowned, "don't call them brats, they have names, and you know it. They were born on November 9, 2010. I don't know the exact time, though." Sheldon nodded, writing the date down on the second item (birthdate) of his form. "That would mean that they're about twenty-one months old, not  _a year and a half,_ like you previously claimed. From what I can see and hear, they can walk and—surprisingly—talk in fragmented, mispronounced sentences. Not very impressive as I have been said to be able to talk properly by the age of seventeen months. But this isn't novel as I am, a prodigy, and these are  _Penny_  and some unknown—probably a doltish neanderthal—man's progenies." He ignored the look of incredulity that Leonard was sending him, and continued. "Have they been thoroughly potty trained?"

His roommate brought his phone out, scrolling through something as the brats leaned over his arm to see what he was doing. "According to the e-mail Penny sent me, they are, but still require diapers for any accidents that might happen. I'll send you the e-mail, it will have the complete list of everything important about them. Like food preferences and their schedules—Penny seems to be very strict about this." Sheldon snickered and added the information to the list. "Very well, I'll inspect it for additional details. Now, how long will they be staying here? Please be precise."

"At least two months, and maybe longer if there are any problems on set."

"Alright. Are you sure it's not too late to get Penny to take them back?" Sheldon raised an eyebrow, lowering the clipboard as Leonard groaned. "Yes, she's probably boarding the plane as we speak, or something."

"Understood. Will you take complete and full responsibility over them?"

"I'll try; I already requested a short vacation and permission to work here at home. But I already used up my vacation days, so they might not give me anything more than a week. Will it be okay if you take care of them once my vacation is up? You  _do_  have a lot of remaining vacation days ready for consumption." Leonard was hopeful, and Sheldon snorted in derision. "That's a negatory, as I have no plans of taking a vacation. However, you may submit a request for that specific conundrum, and I shall look over it when I can." Sheldon ripped a sheet from the clipboard and placed it in the coffee table. "You will get a response within forty-eight hours regarding your request. Now, back to the important part; are you a hundred percent sure that it's not too late to force Penny to get them back?"

"For the last time, yes, it's too late, and no, you are not going to ship them to France!"

They stared at each for a while until Sheldon sighed in defeat, scribbling 'unsuccessful' on the box he created asking if it was too late to return the brats. "Drat, I was hoping that my continuous prodding would somehow change your mind." He drew two lines at the bottom of the page, then directed his gaze at the two brats sitting beside Leonard. They were both still nibbling on a cookie, and retained the familiar clueless expression that belonged to their traitorous former neighbor, Penny. He suddenly felt another twinge of pain on his wrist, and glanced at the last part of his form. "One last question, are both of you able to sign your names?"

Brat one and two both stopped chewing on the cookie, and blinked; unable to comprehend what he had asked.

"Disappointing, but again, what's to expect?" Sheldon shook his head and tucked the clipboard under his arm as he stood. "I guess I'll just have to create an efficient, anomalous crayon made signature that is suitable for a couple of feebleminded brats. Let it never be said that Sheldon Lee Cooper ignored the the silent pleas of infants asking that they be represented in creating a temporary mark of identification that they will most certainly not use once they are of appropriate age to create one themselves."

"Hey, what are you mumbling about?" Leonard asked as Sheldon made his way to the hall. "And where are you going?"

Sheldon stopped, took a few steps back and lifted the clipboard as if it was the answer. "I'm going to my room to locate the first unrevised version of the roommate agreement to use as reference for a more age appropriate one that would be suitable for those two brats."

Leonard winced, "don't tell me you're...?"

"Yes, I'm drawing up a temporary roommate agreement for those brats. Please don't make me repeat myself again, Leonard. Now excuse me, as it will take a lot of referencing and googling to translate the agreement into something even a toddler would understand."

"Da ooh-met ag-eeh-met?" Andy repeated questioningly to his twin sister, "wat dat?"

Maddie shrugged, moving to the edge of the couch to grab a cookie from the coffee table. "Dunno."

Leonard stared at the hall even after his roommate disappeared; finally processing what Sheldon had been blabbering about the entire time. Penny was going to murder him if she ever found out that Sheldon forced her kids to  _sign_  a temporary roommate agreement.

"Penny is so going to kill him," he muttered to himself in fear.


	2. Safety Collisions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang goes shopping for baby proofing items.

Sheldon had to admit, in the course of four days, he had grown oddly interested and acquainted with the two new inhabitants of their apartment.

He had even assigned a unique—yet appropriate—nickname for each of the brats.

Andy, the male brat, was  _Zippy_. Mainly because of his unwavering amount of energy and curiosity for everything, and that often irritated him. He was like a dog; blabbering about everything and running up to anything that he was unfamiliar with. Secretly, Sheldon admired the brat's curiosity and excitement for anything he didn't know of. It was a quality of a scientist, and maybe—just  _maybe_ —he could sharpen this trait within the two months that the brats would lodge here, and turn him into a future scientist. If, of course, there was some sort of miracle that the kid—who was almost a carbon copy of his mother—would somehow managed to  _not_  inherit Penny's intelligence; then maybe he could be a scientist.

Then there was Maddie, the female brat, who he named  _Sully_ —which was short for sullen. The female brat was laid back compared to her twin, and often only spoke unless she was really interested. Zippy would constantly blab to her about something, and—during most days—she would only say 'dunno' unless she actually cared. She did, however, went out of her quiet trance whenever Sheldon was present, and would name various mundane objects that infuriated him to a great extent. Unlike her twin who ran around the apartment, Sully always sat on the the opposite of the couch—which Leonard deemed as  _her_  spot—and watched tv. Sheldon theorized that the female brat was a bit more intelligent than the male one, and did not bother to care about anything else. He liked that about her; it reminded him of himself when he was growing up with Missy who was an annoying, overly energetic motor mouth.

Leonard refused to allow him to call the brats those nicknames. He also refused to allow him to refer to the brats as 'brats'.

He learned a lot about the brats— _twins_  from both Penny's e-mail and from observation. The twins did not eat anything green or funny looking, and had a certain selection of Penny approved food that they were supposed to eat. They worshipped the ground that cartoons walked on, such as Sesame Street, and would throw a hissy fit of tears if they didn't watch it at least once a day. They also had their own respective plush toys that they slept with—a Winnie the Pooh doll for the female, and a Woody the Cowboy doll for the male. It seemed that they also loved anything Disney related, as their bags came with a set of classic Disney movies. They detested baths—Leonard was in charge of that—and often wanted to go out of the apartment to visit the nearby park. According to the e-mail, female twin enjoyed observing the activities happening at parks and male twin liked to play at the playground.

He noticed that if he placed the siblings side by side, they would only be distinguishable by the haircut they donned, even though they were fraternal twins. Male twin had blonde hair that fell a little above his eyes and reached the nape of his neck, while female twin had her hair cut up to her shoulders, and sported bangs—either way, they were both miniature Pennys. Upon closer inspection, he observed that male twin's eyes were a lighter shade of blue than female twin's, and that when it was hit by sunlight, it was a blue-ish green color. Which further strengthened Sheldon's theory that their eyes could still change into the shade of green that Penny had. Both absolutely  _loved_  sweets, and female twin liked fruits more than male twin did. They also had a peculiar regard for Sheldon, and always fought on who got to talk to  _Sedon_ , which was unsurprising, as he really  _was_  amazing.

Sheldon also learned that, if you ignored the male brat long enough, he would start running around the apartment—where female brat would start to go after him to tell him to stop—and that their apartment was  _very_  unsafe for a pair of curious brats.

They learned the last part the hard way.

"Ice! Get an ice pack!" Leonard called as he struggled to carry both of the crying brats to the couch.

Sheldon was busy composing a paper on his current research when male twin,  _Andy_ , went up to him and started babbling about what he learned on tv. Apparently, the foolish puppet said that today's episode was brought to them by the letter O, and the word of the day was orange. The physicist ignored the infant for about ten minutes, then the brat decided to entertain himself by running around the apartment, attempting to recall what each item was called. Sheldon decided that 'ooksef' (bookshelf) and 'eskop' (telescope) tied as the most cringe-worthy of all the items that male brat named. The female twin,  _Maddie_ , had gotten annoyed by her brother's actions, and decided to chase after him to tell him to stop. Then, when Maddie finally got a hold of her twin, Andy tripped and bumped his head against the column that stood at the hall to their rooms. To make matters worse, when Andy fell back, he accidentally knocked Maddie down, and they now had two crying toddlers in pain.

Right when Penny decided to call in via Skype.

"What the hell happened?" The weary mother inquired, leaning into the camera to get a better view of her kids crying. It was two in the morning in France, and due to the ungodly time difference, Penny only called twice; once in the morning (California time) and once in the evening. She normally called to check in on her twins, and to simply catch up with them. Sheldon didn't talk to her much; he refused to. Although he had found a keen interest for the twins, that change of opinion did not apply to their mother. She was still a traitor, and no matter how many times she apologize via video chat, e-mail and text message, he would not forgive her.

"Andy ran around the apartment, Maddie followed, and they both tumbled down. Just like Jack and Jill who went up the hill to fetch a pail of water." Sheldon dully replied, handing Leonard the ice pack before settling his spot. "And before you overreact, Maddie is okay, and Andy only has a small bump on the head. It's not deadly."

Leonard sent Sheldon a look, holding an ice pack to Andy's forehead. "Sheldon, she's just worried! Can you please just be civil to Penny while I take care of this?" Sheldon huffed, turning the laptop to face him and was met with Penny deeply frowning. She looked overtly tired, and if she were not blacklisted, and was currently in the room, he  _might_  have offered her a drink. Sadly, she was blacklisted, and he strongly abhorred her being, and social protocol only applies to friends. And she was in a different continent oceans away. "Leonard, didn't I tell you to get some corner guards to prevent this exact situation?"

"We did! Howard made an even more efficient one that had a soft clay texture, and we placed it on every sharp corner in this apartment."

"Then what the hell happened?" Penny said through gritted teeth, and Sheldon simply stared at the screen; the blonde was fuming. Penny always had a tendency to overreact over the simplest situations; this was not surprising. Parenthood may have been a key factor as to why her possibility of overreacting has heightened, which is a trait Penny shared with his own mother, who always overreacted whenever Missy tripped while playing. She didn't die, she just got a scrape, yet their mother acted as if she had gotten a near death experience. He would never understood parenthood. "It appears that the clay had hardened as opposed to what Howard originally thought," he answered for Leonard, and Penny's frown did not waver. "The original design was for the clay to stay in it's standard soft form, but as expected, it dried, and even if we moistened them daily, it will not revert to it's original form."

"Then what do you intend to do?" Sheldon mentally huffed; why did Penny have so many questions for him, and why was Leonard not answering? This was Leonard's problem, not his. He was only here for observation, and for the triumphant moment where he is proven right, yet again. "Ask Leonard." Shifting to the edge of the couch, he grabbed the laptop and turned it back to Leonard's direction.

The twins had both stopped crying the moment that they saw their mother on the screen. "Mommy!" They cried in unison as they pushed Leonard to move out of the way. "Andy hurt! Mommy kiss booboo!" One cried, and the other placed a tiny hand on her twin's face, shoving him out of the way. "Mommy! Andy hurt Maddie! No kiss Andy booboo!"

"Okay, twins, don't fight—" Penny pleaded as the twins started to roughly push each other out of the way. The need for roughhousing, Sheldon noted, another thing the twins had inherited from their mother. "Mommy will kiss all of those booboos once she's back, okay? So, just stop fighting for now?"

Andy's face contorted in disapproval, and Leonard nearly shuddered at the familiarity. "Mommy! Andy hurt! Kiss, peas?"

"No! Mommy peas kiss Maddie booboo!"

Sheldon snorted, "there's an l in  _please_."

"Sheldon, not now!" Leonard barked as Maddie successfully pushed her twin out of the way. "Mommy, Maddie booboo hurt! Peas kiss?" The female twin stuck her bottom lip out, extending her short arm out to the laptop. Andy—who had been shoved to the back of the couch—started to cry, causing his twin to cry out as well.

Sheldon sent the crying pair a glare while Leonard softly told them to stop crying. He didn't understand why they were crying; it's not like they were dying or something. And he was a hundred percent sure that kissing a booboo  _did not_  cure any type of injuries, but a disinfectant might. "Penny," he loudly said, trying to get the older blonde's attention over the cacophony of crocodile tears. "It has come to my understanding that they want you to 'kiss' their non-existent injury. May you please just pretend to kiss it and save us from this misery?"

Penny raised an eyebrow at him through the screen, then stared at her sobbing kids. Sheldon had a point. "Okay. Hey, Andy, Maddie?" The twins stopped crying again, sniffing and rubbing their eyes on their arms before staring up at the screen. "Okay, now show me where your booboos are." Andy pointed to his forehead while Maddie lifted her arm towards the screen. "Mommy's going to kiss your booboos, okay? One, two, three," Penny puckered her lips and made a loud kissing sound, while Sheldon winced. "There, mommy kissed your booboos! Are you okay now?"

Andy blinked, a hand reaching out to the tiny bump that was now receding. His mommy's kisses always made everything better! "Mommy! Andy booboo no hurt no more!" Maddie nodded in agreement, staring at her arm in amazement. "Mommy kiss da bestest!"

Sheldon shook his head, "there is no such word as  _bestest_. The proper word is—"

"Will you please just let it go, Sheldon?" Penny cried in irritation. She honestly could not believe that he was pointing out every flaw that her twins had. Every time she tried to be nice, and asked him about how he was, he would rudely reply to her and complain about her kids! If only she could just jump out of the screen and punch him and his condescending, know-it-all self, she really would. But no, apparently someone had to alter space and time before that could be possible—which was what Sheldon arrogantly told her when she told him that she wanted to teleport from the laptop and strangle him on his spot. He also did not fail at pointing out his hatred for her; which was quite an improvement from simply ignoring her. Truth be told, she had missed the whack-a-doodle—even with all his infuriating craziness—and it somehow hurt her that he was acting so distant with her. They  _were_  once close friends, and it upset her that a stupid birthday gift (and her leaving for good and not replying to any of his e-mails) had ruined that. He was so cold to her that if she were a glass of water in his hands, she would be frozen into ice by now.

"I am simply educating your children to ensure that even at an early age they will at least be knowledgable." Sheldon snarked at her, which further proved Penny's point. She had a good relationship with all of them—even Howard—and it was only Sheldon who outright refused to let her into his life. "You should be thanking me for doing such a generous act of developing your children's mind for free! By the time they return to you, they will be well versed with the world as they know it. My involvement might even save them from the fiery depths of community college, and lead them to something a bit more respectable—like Princeton, even though it's not a real school."

Leonard turned towards his roommate, a small frown on his face. "What do you mean Princeton isn't a real school? It's one of the most prestigious schools out there!"

Sheldon chortled, "keep telling yourself that and you might just believe it."

"Wat Sedon say?" Andy asked, curiously listening to Sheldon's speech. "Mommy, wat pis... piston?"

" _Pinston_ ," Maddie corrected, shaking her head at her twin. "Sedon say pinston. Mommy, wat pinston?"

"Uh, it's where Uncle Leonard went to college. It's a good school," Penny explained, unsure of how to tell toddlers what Princeton was. "Maybe one day both of you can go there, too."

"Penny!" Sheldon interrupted, breaking his discussion about colleges with Leonard. "If you will encourage your children about academics, at least aim high!" There was a loud, offended 'hey' from Leonard, which he ignored. "Although I am certain that your progenies—who resemble you quite strikingly—will  _not_  get into a school as prestigious and well-respected as Harvard, I am sure that with enough influence from me, will be able to  _at least_  get into Princeton. However, I can't assure you that they will gain as much success as I have attained, but they have a good shot at at least getting a fourth of it."

Maddie scrunched her face in determination as she tried to process what Sheldon had said. She tapped on Sheldon's arm, holding up four fingers. "Foh?"

"Very good, Maddie!" Sheldon cheered, genuinely impressed that the toddler had managed to understand a word from his rant. He placed a hand on her head, gently patting it as the toddler grinned happily. Maybe, he could give her a chocolate as a reward; like he did to their mother many years ago...

"Andy do foh, too!" Andy piped in, raising a hand with four fingers up at Sheldon. "See? Foh! Foh fingahs!" Maddie's smile dropped, turning into a deep frown as she turned to her twin brother. Leonard shuddered again, the simple facial expression reminded him of someone...  _close._  "Andy! You no do foh!" She stuck a finger at him in disapproval, "Andy no good!" The male twin gasped, his eyes narrowing. "Andy good!"

"This might take a while," Penny groaned as she watched her twins argue in front of the screen. The twins fought over the simplest things, and both did not like it when the other was praised, and one was not. That usually led to a long fight that was full of rambling and hard-to-decipher baby talk. They had once fought for an hour about cookies; and she was sure that they didn't get it from  _her_  side of the family. "So... What do you guys plan on doing about this death trap apartment of yours?"

Leonard raised his eyebrows, turning to Sheldon who was staring at the screen. "Uh, well, since Howard's invention didn't work, I guess we'll just get the baby proofing things tomorrow. It's almost time for their nap."

"If you call tomorrow, you might be able to harass Wolowitz for doing a horrible job of protecting your progenies." Sheldon added dully, "although I am against changing the apartment just for the sake of your uninvited children's safety, I must digress as Leonard will do it anyway, right Leonard?"

Penny pursed her lips at the annoying physicist who was smugly smirking at her through a screen. One day, the irony of all of this would hit him right in the face and she would make sure that she would be the one to hit him with it. Stupid Leonard and his stupid plan; she wouldn't have to endure this if he didn't push the idea on her. If the screen wasn't there to stop her, she would really have socked Sheldon by now, regardless of the repercussions. "Leonard, just make sure that you make your apartment safer than safe itself." The experimental physicist nodded quietly, frightened at Penny's angry tone. "And  _you_  Sheldon! You better act nicely or else I  _will_  go junior rodeo on you!"

"What do you mean,  _me_?" Sheldon hissed from his spot, getting the fighting twins' attention. "Penny, may I remind you that I  _did not_  in any way agree to this arrangement. I also do not have any intention of having anything to do with your progenies with some random man, and will not allow you to reprimand, butcher and threaten me on something I have no responsibility of! These are  _your_  children,  _not_  mine, please remember that when you plan on blaming me for something that I did not do."

There was a pause of silence; the twins stared up at Sheldon in fear, Leonard was at a loss for words and Penny was struck by pure disbelief.

With a snarl, Penny snapped out of her trance and frowned at Sheldon. A spot on her hip suddenly hurt—one where a set of scars used to be. "I'm not even going to take that from you, Sheldon. Do what I say and I'll talk to you guys tomorrow."

"Penny, wait—" Leonard called; Sheldon had gone too far. "No Leonard, it's okay, I'm a grown woman and am an actress who gets criticize for everything I do. A little trash talk from Sheldon isn't going to bring me down; he's done worse. Goodnight, twins." Andy and Maddie tore their gazes from the rigid man, and turned to their mother to wave at her. "Night, night mommy." Penny gave her twins a small smile before logging off the video chat.

"Sheldon! That was going too far!" Leonard growled at his roommate who sat at his spot, with a bored expression. If he could just tell him... Sheldon was just impossible. "You're not supposed to insult Penny like that—you don't know what she went through as a single mother! She doesn't deserve that, so call her up and apologize!"

Sheldon blinked at Leonard, calmly replying, "I'm not saying that I fully understand what she supposedly went through as a mother, what I'm saying is that I do not have any reason or responsibility to even care for these children. I had no intention of insulting her, as you so kindly pointed out, I am merely pointing out the facts. Why should I apologize for being honest with her? Does she not at least deserve our honesty?"

Leonard shook his head at his roommate; he was so unbelievable. Penny did not deserve the recent flak that Sheldon was giving her. The blonde had gone through a lot in the almost two years that she disappeared; with her pregnancy and being a single mother—Sheldon needed to understand that. He really felt bad for his former neighbor and girlfriend; she could probably take criticism from unknown people, but he was sure that criticism from Sheldon was what she couldn't handle. He could see the tears forming in her eyes after Sheldon insulted her, and if Sheldon wasn't a  _tiny bit_  stronger than him, he would have punched him. But Sheldon would probably be able to dodge it, so he'd just punish him in a different way. "If you don't apologize to Penny, I will make sure that you won't be able to go to the dentist on Sunday!"

Sheldon crossed his arm, "alright, I'll just take the bus."

"The bus? But the bus is dirty and unsanitary and just imagine all the different germs that the passengers bring. Even your bus pants won't save you from  _all those germs_." Leonard pointed out, strongly emphasizing the word  _germs_. Sheldon's face started to twitch, and Leonard knew that he had gotten to him. There were only three things that could get Sheldon to do something; blackmail via germs, blackmail via his mother, and blackmail via his Meemaw. "Fine. I'll apologize to Penny," Leonard mentally cheered and hoped that this gesture would finally patch things between the two. "But I'll do it tomorrow. After we buy those infant protector guards that Penny requested."

Leonard furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, "I thought that you wanted nothing to do with the twins?"

Sheldon nodded as he stood up, making his way to the kitchen. "That is true, however, we all know that you can't function without me, and those children can't tell left from right. My presence shall ensure that the items you buy will be tried and tested." He pulled a bottle of water from the fridge, and smirked at his roommate. "And don't forget to call Wolowitz and Koothrapali to tag along."

Leonard just stared at his roommate, uncertain of what he was supposed to say, then sighed. He could hear the twins whispering to each other about how they were going out tomorrow and he could only guess on what hidden agenda Sheldon had.

Sheldon  _rarely_  did anything voluntarily; there was always a catch. What it was, however, he'd have to find out.

* * *

"Ooh! Look at how cute that would be if we got that for the twins!" Raj chirped as he stepped closer to a lamp in the shape of a giraffe. "That would look great in the apartment!"

Leonard and Howard each pushed a cart, a twin sitting comfortably on each, as Raj and Sheldon scanned for the necessary items in the Sheldon approved store. Sheldon had spent an hour filtering through the hundreds of stores that sold kids furniture, looking for one that was 'good enough.' It was Raj who insisted that the best furniture stores were in Los Angeles, as that was where the 'celebrities' shopped, which meant that the stores were the best, especially as Penny was a celebrity. They had all originally gone against the idea, but Raj had shown Sheldon that the store had various themed items— _superhero items_ , and that convinced him to shop there.

"Raj, we're only here for safety items, not to furnish their own room," Sheldon reminded, eyeing a lamp that was shaped like a monkey. "Although, this might be efficient for them." He turned around to face the twins, who were watching him closely, and lifted the lamp for them to see. "What do you think, children? Wouldn't this be nice?"

Maddie shook her head and pointed to the bear shaped lamp on the display. "Pooh! Maddie want Pooh, peas!"

Sheldon frowned, sending the toddler a judgmental look before placing the lamp back on the shelf. Not only did she want a  _bear_  shaped one, but referred to it as 'Pooh.' Did Penny ever teach her children anything useful? "It's not a  _Pooh_ , it's a bear. But what can you expect from gullible infants?"

"No Pooh?" The toddler innocently asked, and Sheldon sneered, "no, we will not be getting that horrendous animal. Now let's carry on, gentlemen."

Leonard scowled as his roommate walked away, and noticed how Maddie's face scrunched up in disappointment. The twins always wanted Sheldon's attention, and it affected them whenever he ignored them. Sheldon literally exerted zero effort in trying to get to know the twins; all he did was silently observe them with a critical eye, and reference the e-mail that Penny sent. That was it. When it came to the twins, Leonard wasn't sure if Sheldon could be anymore clueless when it came to them. Leonard could admit that it was hard to deal with children, and he knew better than anyone else that it was difficult to get used to assessing children's needs and wants, but Sheldon was going way off in the deep end, here. He wasn't even approaching them with a hint of sensitivity. No, he dealt with them as though they were nuisances, and inanimate objects. It even took an hour of arguing just to get him to stop calling the twins as brats! He wouldn't even speak to them, at all. The other day; the twins—bless them—being the friendly and happy souls that they were, had attempted to come over and show Sheldon the clay sculptures they each made. They had both approached him at his spot, holding up their masterpieces, and Leonard knew by the look on the twins' face that they were just dying for Sheldon to see their creation, and see him be proud of what they made.

But all their temporary guardian had done was fix them with a blank look, and told Leonard that the 'brats' seemed to want something. Without another word, he had gotten up, and moved to his desk. This had earned him a glare from both Raj and Howard, who were playing HALO, a hurt look from both of the twins, and a mere shake of the head from Leonard. How could he try and tell him how to deal with the twins, when he didn't even  _want_  to deal with the twins? That was another trigger for him to tell Sheldon the truth, but restrained himself. All in due time, he reminded himself each time Sheldon ignored the twins who just wanted to get close to him. No matter how much his stubborn roommate ignored the twins, the two innocent, cheerful and friendly toddlers seemed to still strive to get to know him better. Sheldon was lucky that they were such good kids, if it had been him, he would've shot him with a laser by now.

Raj grabbed the bear lamp from the shelf, and placed it in the cart. Though he couldn't speak to women unrelated to him, he found it surprising that he never had trouble talking to Penny's daughter. Aside from Bernadette, Maddie was the only female (that he wasn't related to) that he could talk to without any alcohol, and that made him have a soft spot for the toddler. He didn't love Andy any less, though, he loved both of the munchkins equally and always made it a point to spoil them rotten. There was just something about them that was so lovable; that even Bernadette—who strongly disliked children—fell in love at first sight with them. Although, there was a bet between him and Leonard on whether or not the twins would become insufferably annoying, as there was a fifty percent chance that they would. Thankfully, they weren't  _yet_ , and they all hoped that they stayed that way. "Don't worry, Maddie, Uncle Raj will get the lamp for you." He grabbed the monkey lamp and placed it in the cart where Andy sat, "and this one is for you, Andy. Don't mind Sheldon, he's just a gigantic nincompoop."

Andy furrowed his eyebrows, trying to repeat the word Raj used. "Nicu-nico... nicopup? Wat nicopup?" He tilted his head up at Leonard who was shaking his head while Howard hissed at Raj, "thanks for teaching them something important, Raj!" The engineer turned to the toddler in front of him, "that's a bad word, Andy—well, it's not but don't use it. Don't use it till you're older." He placed a hand on Andy's head, ruffling his hair as Sheldon stormed towards them.

"Why weren't you following me?" The theoretical physicist asked before noticing the animal lamps in the carts. "And why are those, there?" Raj opened his mouth to speak, but Sheldon interrupted him by holding a hand up, then turned to Maddie. "Didn't I say that we're not getting that? What part of  _no_  did you fail to understand?"

Maddie blinked, staring at the grumpy man in front of her. "No Pooh," she answered, pointing a finger at Raj, "Uncah Waj put. Maddie no want," she turned to her brother who was nodding vigorously, waving his arms animatedly. "Maddie no want! Uncah Waj say Sedon nicopup!" Andy dramatically said, and Raj felt the color drain from his face as Sheldon crossed his arms, clearly unimpressed. "Correct me if I'm wrong—and I'm not—but does Andy mean,  _nincompoop_?"

Both of the twins nodded, and Howard and Leonard mentally noted that they had absolutely nothing to do with this mess.

"I just wanted to get Maddie the lamp! And of course, I had to get Andy one! I'm going to pay for it, and I didn't mean nincompoop..." Raj stammered nervously, waiting for Sheldon to announce the punishment he would give him. The last time he got Sheldon mad, his limited edition, collector's item Jon Snow cutout—which had been at their office for secret reasons—received a dent shaped in the foot size of someone crazy. Which was why he was relieved when Sheldon finally got a new office, and he was now free to do as he pleased with Sheldon's old one—like placing the life-sized Daenerys cutout near the door. However, though it was technically  _his_  office now, Sheldon was still the one who got a say in what items would get to go in the office. With Sheldon angered, Raj's motion to reconsider Sheldon's refusal of allowing him to put a popcorn machine in the office would have to wait.

"Although my brain is ordering to give you a far worse punishment than I've come up with, I decided to not listen, as there are children present." Sheldon gestured to the twins, then placed his hands behind his back, "so, instead, I will simply tell Penny that you are spoiling her children rotten. Now, let's get back to business, shall we?" He snapped his fingers, jerking a thumb over his shoulder then spun around to continue walking.

Raj sighed, quickly trailing after Sheldon. "Damn, Penny is so going to kill me."

"Language, Raj, Penny's going to make your death a bit more painful if they learn to swear." Leonard reminded as Sheldon grabbed an armful of wall guards, outlet covers and latches, carelessly dumping them into the cart. His roommate pulled the checklist from his pocket, and Leonard heard the twins conversing on how Sheldon reminded them of Joe and Steve from Blue's Clues. "We still need one of those disgustingly bright playpens, something for them to sleep on that won't result in blunt head force trauma caused by falling off of Leonard's bed, and highchairs." Sheldon frowned at the list, then at the various cribs displayed around the store. "We need something short term, plus, I highly doubt that they would still need a crib."

"Dude!" Raj yelped, his eyes wide, causing the other three men to jump, "look at that nursery set, it's adorable!" He approached the display bedroom, gesturing for them to come over.

Sheldon stared at the set, questioning why Raj was so excited over it. The walls were white with an accent of light brown, which seemed a bit dark for him. The crib was plain white, with quilt like sheets that had the same color scheme with the mobile above it. He wanted something short term, as the brats were not staying at their apartment for long. And if they were going for something long term, he would have gone for the superhero crib set, but those were too bulky. He would have preferred simply pulling Leonard's bed apart, and simply leaving the mattress on the floor, but none of them had enough strength to do the heavy lifting. Cribs and toddler beds were meant for a child's room, not for a temporary living space. Plus, the toddler beds were either in the shape of girlish, inane and cheaply made castle, and malformed plastic cars. None were in the shape of the Batmobile, or the Enterprise, or the Deathstar, or the telephone booth from Dr. Who, and that simply would not do.

"What exactly is 'adorable' about it?" He asked, eyeing the eyesore of a supposed children's bedroom. The Indian man scoffed, standing beside a mural of a cloud and the sun, "Look at how cute this is! It is definitely my ideal nursery, if you ask me!"

Leonard turned the cart so that Maddie cold see the room, and Howard did the same for Andy. "What do you think twins, do you want a crib?"

"Maddie not baby!"

"Andy not baby!"

Howard chuckled, turning the cart back and wheeling it to the next display. "Sorry Raj, they didn't ask you." Sheldon stepped of the low platform, scowling at the various other nursery sets. "Is there anything here that applies to temporary lodging only?"

"I don't think there's a category for that," Leonard commented, grabbing a colorful playpen that was displayed and placed it in the cart. "But look, you can cross playpen off." Sheldon nodded, crossing off the item on the list. "Highchair and bed are the only ones left. Any ideas?"

"Hmm... There has to be something a bit more convenient," Howard murmured, tapping a finger on his chin as he thought. "I got it!" The engineer spun around, scanning the aisles before disappearing, and reappearing from one. He had a bunch of attachable bars in his arms and a proud grin on his face. "Is this considered as short term?" Leonard took one of the bars encased in plastic and rotated it in his hands. "It's attachable, and can be easily removed for when they leave. It can prevent any incidents of rolling off the bed, and isn't metal. Howard, this is brilliant!" Sheldon snatched the bar from his hands and eyed it. "Leonard's observations seem to be correct..." He placed the bar into the cart and gave Howard an impressed smile. "Well done, Howard. This is truly a great idea."

Howard grinned, surprised and happy at one of the rare occurrences that Sheldon complimented him. "Thanks! I just remembered that there was something like that, and that it would work." He watched as Sheldon crossed it off the list, "so, just highchairs left, huh?"

Andy squirmed in his seat, frowning at the mention of the chair. "Andy no want eye-chah!" Sheldon raised an eyebrow, peering at him from the list. "But that's not really up to you, now is it?" The toddler looked down, and then a happy squeal captured Sheldon's attention, followed by a tug on the sleeve of his windbreaker. Maddie wanted to say something. "And what are your thoughts on a highchair?"

She grinned, then pointed a finger towards the opposite direction.

Raj was grinning widely as he scurried towards them, one arm struggling to carry a tiny couch, and the other hand dragging one across the floor. " _Dude_! Look what I found—isn't it amazing?" He stopped in front of the carts, placing one couch on each. "Think about it, two highchairs have no space in the apartment, and if we got them booster seats, we'd need a table," Raj excitedly explained as the three men listened to him, "and Sheldon doesn't want to get a table. But, I saw this, and I remembered that all of us eat at the couch! Now here's one for each of them,  _and_ ," he unfolded the foam and transforming it to a tiny bed, "for nap time! What do you think? It's pretty cool, and it's easy to move around, too!"

Sheldon poked his finger at the couch, pressing on the foam and sighing. "It pains me to admit it but, yes, this is perfect as a substitute for a highchair." He frowned as his three friends cheered happily. Why they were so happy, he didn't know, but he was glad that the task was finished. Now, he didn't have to worry about any snarky comments that Penny would give him if their apartment was safe for her uninvited brats.

Shopping list and safety precautions done, there was still one thing he had to do that bothered him heavily.

Apologizing to Penny.

* * *

"—and we got corner guards and outlet covers everywhere," Leonard turned the laptop to show Penny the new changes. "Then over here," he walked towards the couch, tilting the screen for her to see, "is their playpen, and we placed baby gates at the front door, and the hall. Plus, Howard invented a special button for the twins' door that would help them open it if ever they had to go to the bathroom."

He returned to the sofa, placing the laptop on the coffee table and turning it to show the twins on their respective couch. Andy's was green with tiny dinosaurs spread across the fabric, and Maddie's was of light blue with white patterned squares and a tiny smiling cartoon girl every now and then. It was originally pink, but the toddler had gone affronted and angrily demanded a different one be bought. She obviously did not inherit her mother's color preference, and temper. Their mother at least waited patiently before finally erupting like a volcano. "And look! Raj found toddler sized couches for them to sit on!"

Maddie stood from her couch, toddling over to the laptop. "Mommy! Uncah Waj got Maddie and Andy a ouch!"

"An  _ouch_?" Penny repeated curiously as Andy got up from his chair to stand beside his twin.

"She means  _couch_ , but it isn't surprising to hear that everything that comes out of your children's mouths are all mispronounced and incoherent." Sheldon corrected from his desk, and Penny's mood suddenly soured. There was nothing like hearing Sheldon's condescending voice to end a tiring day full of re-shoots and near set-accidents. She loved shooting the movie, and loved strolling around Paris as the production team set up the next scene; but damn, shooting an action movie was exhausting. She had to learn some martial arts for her scenes where she had to defend herself, she had to learn how to drive fast and sharp for the chase scenes where she had forgotten to say no to doing her own stunts, plus, she had to restrain herself from quitting and flying back to California to see her twins. She missed her children so, so,  _so_  much that she was rethinking the job. She wanted to see them, spend time with them, hug them—but she couldn't because she had finally got this far, and it would be stupid to quit.

Two months were short, but also too long to be apart from her children. They only had two months to wrap up all of the scenes in France, then they'd return to California to shoot the rest of the movie. She didn't enjoy the rush to finish half of the movie, or the wake up call at four in the morning to start shooting, but it was exhilarating in it's own way. This was her first movie, and so everything she did gave her an adrenaline rush. She loved the cast—it was so awesome to work with the crème de la crème—and the hype her name was getting for being involved in one of the most anticipated movies. Cause really, this project was doing her reputation wonders; everyone who didn't watch her show started to watch her show just to see who she was, and even the negativity gave her name a gigantic buzz. It was safe to say that the social media talked about her nineteen-seven—she'd love it to upgrade to twenty-four seven, but fame was a tricky road, and she'd take what she could get.

The one thing she looked forward to the most—after twenty-two hours straight of taping and training—was seeing, hearing and talking to the greatest thing that happened to her life, and even Sheldon couldn't ruin that.

"Oh, Sheldon, don't you just love it when no one cares?" Penny quipped as Sheldon made his way to his spot. "Yes, joke about it now, but you'll be the first one to thank me when your children learn something important." He heard a growl coming from the laptop, then a hiss from Leonard. "I think you're forgetting something  _important_ , Sheldon," his bespectacled roommate said, turning the laptop away from the twins, effectively interrupting the chorus of confusing babbling. "Sorry kids, Sheldon has to say something to your mother."

"Sedon talk to mommy?" Andy asked with interest, and Leonard nodded causing the twins' eyes to twinkle in delight.

Sheldon crossed his arms, ignoring the conversation between Leonard and the twins about his relationship with the older blonde, and stared at the image of Penny mirroring the frown on his face. There was no easy way to do it, and he found himself going back on what he said, if it weren't for the odd sensation his teeth gave him. One day, he would surely find a way to learn how to drive; then, Leonard would never be able to threaten him with the concept of riding the germ riddled bus. "Penny, it has come to my realization that what I had told you yesterday was beyond offensive, and apparently, you did not deserve any of it." Penny still looked affronted, and he continued. "I had no intention of ever hurting your feelings and am truly sorry for implying that you do not know who the twins' father is, and for," he turned to the twins, "cover your ears." The twins nodded, both clapping their hands over their ears. "And for implying that you were some sort of whore, as well as treating you as if you were a criminal. Though a part of me vehemently disagrees, I am now declaring you  _not_  banned from this apartment, and am placing you in a neutral zone than an enemy zone."

"Which means that...?" Penny drawled, slightly confused on what the hell Sheldon was talking about. Sheldon resisted the urge to roll his eyes; Penny would always be Penny. "I no longer see you as an enemy, and a potential threat to my person. Though, please do bear in mind that I do not consider you as a friend, but as a mere newly met acquaintance." Leonard scooted over to Sheldon, sending Penny a big grin of pride, that confused Penny even more. "It means that you are no longer viewed with any ill judgement. Congratulations, Penny, you're now friends with Sheldon!"

There was a beat of a minute before someone spoke; it was Maddie.

"Mommy and Sedon fends?" Maddie had asked, toddling over to the laptop and turning to Sheldon, who furrowed his eyebrows. "You and mommy fends, now?" Sheldon blinked at the hope emanating from the infant in front of him, then glanced at the screen where Penny had an indecisive look, as if she was heavily assessing the situation. A second later, Andy moved from his spot at their couches, and stood beside his twin sister, placing a tiny hand on his knee. There was an urge to swat it away, but Penny was watching. "Andy want mommy and Sedon be fends!" The male brat announced, a grin spreading across his face.

Sheldon stuck his chin out, ignoring both of the twins. "No, we are not friends," he firmly said, and saw the glee fall from both of the toddlers' faces. Like their mother, they had to accept the cold hard truth. He wasn't going to let Penny back into his life so easily as she had disregarded him in hers. Like he said, there was no easy way to do this, and no amount of Leonard's blackmails and Penny's threats would—

"Sedon no wike mommy," Andy murmured in between trembling breaths, then turned to his sister whose face was twisting in anguish. Sheldon's eyes widened in horror as both of their lips started to quiver, and profound tears came spilling out as they cried. He didn't understand what caused them to cry, and started to panic. Was it because they had finally realized how utterly superior he really was and that they never had a chance of attaining such success? Was it because they suddenly decided that their couches were not to their gullible tastes? Or was it because he said that Penny wasn't his... friend.

But he couldn't lie!

But the tears were causing him great distress! And the pitiful wailing coming from both of them and the snarls of anger from their mother were unnerving him!

"Uh, no," Sheldon cleared his throat, waving his hands to get the sobbing infants' attention. "Well, uh, what I meant was that we aren't  _friends_ , friends, but more like acquaintance typed friends!" Leonard raised an eyebrow at Sheldon's stammering, but allowed him to continue, as the explanation was causing both the twins and Penny to stop wailing. The twins in disappointment, and Penny in anger at Sheldon causing her children to cry. "There is no need to cry," Sheldon continued, awkwardly placing his hands on both of the twins heads and patting them gently. "I, uh, like your mother, no worries. Please stop crying." There was a broken quality—pleading, even—in Sheldon's voice, and Leonard briefly wondered why. "I'm friends with your mother, okay?"

Both happy with the clarification; the tears instantly cleared and Sheldon cursed their hidden ability of acting well.

Maddie twisted her body to face the laptop, and Penny shook her head at her twins' mischief. They were great at crying to get what they wanted. She didn't know if she should be proud that her children were great actors, or to get mad at whoever taught them the trick. "Mommy! Sedon say you fends! Mommy happy now?" She winced at the happiness in her daughter's eyes, and decided against telling her that she really  _wasn't_  friends with their beloved  _Sedon_. "Uh, sure. I guess I'm happy that me and Sheldon are friends again." The twins both clapped their hands in delight, and Leonard gave out a sigh of relief. "So, Sheldon, we're friends again?"

The physicist's mouth curled in distaste, "yeah, sure, we're friends." Then his expression changed, "did you know that Koothrappali is spoiling your children to an overwhelming extent?"

Penny held back a grin as Sheldon tattled on Raj, who she definitely needed to hogtie. Even if Sheldon was just lying to get her kids to stop crying, he  _did_  say that she was now in the 'neutral' zone. That was way better than whatever zone he had originally placed her in, and considered this as progress. Progress at getting Sheldon to at least be on speaking terms with her. Because a friend was still a friend, and even if he didn't want her as a friend, she still wanted him back.

She was going to weasel herself back into his life, whether he liked it or not.


	3. The Takeover - Part One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To prove Leonard wrong, Sheldon babysits the twins by himself.

**Monday;** uncounted start of task / 7 days until end of task.

* * *

Andy watched curiously as Sheldon carefully attached a Lego block to the big circle thingy. He had been constructing the circle thing for hours now and it only piqued both of the twins' interests.

They hadn't missed a single block getting attached.

"Sedon," Maddie spoke up from the opposite side of the coffee table, "wat dat?"

Sheldon peered down from the  _thing_ , and stared at the two toddlers excitedly watching him from across the table. "It's a Lego Death Star that I bought for my birthday. I'm trying to achieve the task of finishing it before next week and attempt to prove Raj wrong that I  _can_  finish it within a week." Two pairs of blue eyes continued to stare at him, "this is very important as both my Hulk hands and my Green Lantern lamp—which he had given me in exchange for being his wingman—are at stake. So, please stop bothering me." He gave them a forced smile, then returned to building the Death Star. There was no way he was going to give his favorite gifts back.

Maddie nodded, and Andy frowned. "Sedon wat a deet stah?"

" _Det_  stah!" His twin corrected, pointing to the circle thing—the 'det stah' and shaked her head in disapproval. "Andy! Dats a det stah!"

With a huff, Sheldon paused (again) in building and sighed. "The Death Star is from Star Wars and is a space station slash super-weapon that Darth Vader, a.k.a. Anakin Skywalker, built after he crossed over to the dark side." The twins nodded, a soft 'oh' falling from their lips. "If you have any more questions, speak now or hold your peace until I finish this." There was a short pause—which Sheldon hoped would be the end of the discussion—then Andy spoke again, "Who An-uh-kin? Who Dat Bedah?"

"Does your mother ever teach you anything?" Sheldon rhetorically asked as both of the toddlers shrugged. "Your mother could have at least taught you on her limited knowledge of one the greatest science fiction works of all time; especially as we had already bought her her own set of the entire series!" He shook his head at the thought, pursing his lips at their former neighbor's incompetence. No matter, he would be the one who would enlighten these simpletons' mind with all of the knowledge they would ever need. Leave it to Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper to ensure that the future generation will at least be able to contribute a minuscule of knowledge while his own intellectually gifted overlord children guided humanity into a brighter tomorrow. Maybe his own children could make use of these two simpletons if they proved to be useful when the time comes. They could be the engineers of the future, forced to do anything his overlord children wants them to do. Penny should really thanks him for even allowing her children a chance of a wonderful future as his future children's slaves.

"Darth Vader and Anakin are the same person, he just used a pseudo name to embrace his newfound darkness."

Maddie placed a finger on her chin, scrunching her face in concentration. "An-uh-kin and Dat Bedah same?" Sheldon nodded, curious to see where this would go. "Wike mommy and Peh-nee same?" He had to give it to this one; she was proving herself worthy of getting his praise. Though this one had limited comments compared to her twin, when she did speak, her comments were apt and logical. The male one wasn't too gullible as he had originally thought—and that heavily pained him to admit—and had even gained his respect in his own way. Whereas Maddie was logical, though obviously lacking in the attention department, Andy was curious and ready to experience the world, as Raj would say. Zippy always asked questions and was keen to learn, sometimes even retaining some of the information, and Sully always had a logical follow up to the questions her twin posed.

To keep it simple, they had earned a  _little_  respect from him.

Andy's eye widened as Sheldon opened his mouth to praise his twin, and vigorously waved a hand at him. "Andy know too! Ayn Man and Toh-nee Stahk!"

Sheldon would be lying if he said that he wasn't shocked at what Zippy said. The kid's curiosity and insistent asking on 'who dat' and 'wat dat' during the entirety of them watching Iron Man 2 had finally paid off. The twins had only been staying at their apartment for a week and a day, and yet his intelligence had already rubbed off on them.

Penny should thank him for the generous act.

"Well done!" He adulated, clapping his hands in delight. "I can't believe both of you managed to see the connection." The two grinned proudly at him and this may have been the first time that he didn't find it annoying for them to do so. He believed that credit should be given where credit was due. "You might not be as dumb as I thought you were; kudos." He gave them one small smile before returning to his Legos, as Leonard entered the apartment, balancing a bag of groceries and a bag of takeout in his arms. Howard and Raj shortly followed, carrying their own bags of groceries in their arms.

Leonard wobbled halfway to the coffee table, shifting the grocery bag. "Hey, Sheldon could you please help us with these?"

"I'd love to, but I'm afraid I'm busy," Sheldon replied as he checked the guide then attached another Lego.

Howard gently dropped his grocery bag on the floor, then helped Leonard with the bag of takeout and placed it on the table. "You're not busy, you're just  _playing_." He gestured for Sheldon to move the Lego model, causing the physicist to groan. "I can be busy playing, for your information." Sheldon said as he carefully lifted the model, placing it on top of his desk. "And I was busy preventing my brain from winning and forcing me to destroy this model out of pure frustration." He eyed his work, proud at what he had accomplished, then turned to watch Leonard taking out the groceries one by one. "You don't understand how exasperating and utterly tiring that is. Ask the children, they saw how hard I'm working." The twins nodded, taking a seat at their respective couches, and Sheldon returned to his spot.

"Oh gee, I bet it's way more exhausting than taking care of twins and a semi-grown up man!" Leonard sarcastically said, "god, Sheldon, I don't understand how you even have the audacity to say that you're tired when you don't even do anything here!"

Sheldon frowned in indignation; obviously, there was a nerve that had been touched. "Excuse me, but I am offended by your choice of words. Didn't you swear that you would take complete and utter responsibility over all of the twins' wants and needs as they are  _your_  guest? Must I take out my copy of the temporary roommate agreement to further solidify my stance and counter your unnecessary whining?"

A food container was carelessly dropped in front of him in response.

"I know I promised to take care of them, but my vacation days are running out," Leonard wearily explained, placing his laptop on a chair in front of the tv before preparing the twins' dinner. "The next fundraiser isn't until November, and until then, I can't promise President Siebert any more donations for the department. A week was the longest he could give me, and I had to use 'family emergency' to gain another two days. I'm required to get back to work by tomorrow, and I'm still trying to think of what to do."

Raj nodded in understanding, passing Howard his food container. "I'd love to volunteer to take care of the twins, but I used up my vacation days for when I took that three day, two nights stay at Palm Springs." Howard raised an eyebrow at him, and Raj simply shrugged. "It was definitely worth it, even if I couldn't tell the masseur where it hurts since she was a girl. But I made sure that the next massage I got was from a guy, just so I could point out the cricks."

"I'm just going to cut him and save us from the misery of imagining that," Howard said, flinching at the sight of Raj getting a massage. "I'd say get my mom to look after them, but I'd only suggest that if you want them to return to Penny about thirty pounds heavier." He spread his arms out to further emphasize the size of the twins after staying with his mother, "and we all know that Penny wouldn't want that. Sheldon, why don't you watch the twins for a while? I heard from HR that you have at least two weeks of vacation days waiting to be abused."

"Leonard and I already talked about that," Sheldon commented, furtively watching as Leonard fixed the twins' dinner. Macaroni and cheese that did not have any preservatives, and was preferably home-cooked. That was one of the guidelines that Penny gave regarding the twins' food; everything had to be  _real_  food. Luckily, Raj found a restaurant that served mac n' cheese, as well as other pasta variants that Penny recommended with baby food on the side, and Leonard had started to buy the twins' meals there. The restaurant was also now his Tuesday burger joint (it was even better than his former order), as he refused to ever step inside a Cheesecake Factory ever again. "My refusal still stands, and can we please cut the banal chit chat? The food is getting cold." Sheldon lifted the lid of his food container, and Leonard readied himself for his roommate's regular line of questioning.

"Did you remember to ask for the chicken with broccoli to be diced, not shredded, even though the menu description specifies shredded?"

"Yes."

"Brown rice, not white?"

"Yes."

"Did you stop at the Korean grocery and get the good, hot mustard?"

"Yes."

"Remarkable, you finally got it right," Sheldon leaned over to pick up his dinner, glancing at the twins who were watching in awe. "And that's how you ensure that your food is perfect."

Howard scoffed, imitating Sheldon, "And that's how you act crazy."

"Hey, check if Penny's online," Raj suggested, pointing his fork at the laptop in front, "it's about four in the morning there, she's probably up to prepare for shooting." The astrophysicist looked at Sheldon pointedly, and he could do nothing but stand up. "Alright, but if this delay causes my food's temperature to drop, you will all suffer the consequences." He made his way towards the front, scowling down at Leonard's laptop, and at the list of contacts on his Skype account. Penny was listed as one of them, and Sheldon's scowl only deepened. When Penny had left two years and four months ago, she had removed all of them from all of her social networking accounts. Though he knew that Penny had accepted Leonard back into Skype—they always called Penny via Leonard's laptop—it irked him that she had still not accepted his invitation. He was trying to be the bigger man, and be the one to at least try to accommodate her into his life. As expected, she ignored the invitation, and he hoped that she knew that this was not helping in getting her back into his good graces.

He clicked the call button—which Penny answered—but was met by the plain wall of either her hotel room or trailer.

"I think she has fallen back to sleep," Sheldon informed them as he returned to his spot. "But the call has started." He placed a piece of chicken in his mouth and grinned; it was still at his preferred temperature.

Maddie curiously stared at her bowl of mac n' cheese, momentarily ignoring the second bowl which contained her favorite; mashed bananas. She lifted a finger, abandoning her monkey shaped spork, poking it into the yellow substance then bringing it to her mouth. She grimaced at the taste, exclaiming, "ick!"

"Ick?" Leonard repeated, lowering his container as Andy did the same. "What do you mean, ick?"

Andy lifted his bowl towards Howard, "Tase."

The engineer carefully took the bowl and ate a spoonful. "It's a bit salty," he said once he'd had a gulp of water, "did you forget to tell them to water it down a bit? You know that the cheese gets a bit salty sometimes."

Leonard paled as both of the twins pushed their bowls away, "I did! I always remind them that it's for toddlers and that the cheese might be a bit too strong for them."

"Oh Leonard, just admit that you once again, have failed."

"Failed… what exactly are you implying Sheldon?" Leonard narrowed his eyes at Sheldon. Howard sent Raj a look, telling him not to interfere. Sheldon-Leonard fights were always ugly, and the last time they got involved, they were forced to take sides.

"Well, like I said, you failed, again. Just declare that you fail at getting the right food," Sheldon dipped a strip of chicken in the sauce and frowned once he took a bite of it. "This mustard isn't that spicy."

"What do you mean it wasn't spicy—I got that where I always buy it!"

"I give you such easy tasks and yet somehow you always manage to fail at them, Leonard." Sheldon clucked his tongue at his roommate, who was starting to literally produce smoke from his ears.

"EASY TASKS? Do you think taking care of you is easy?" Leonard growled in disbelief; he knew that Sheldon was just being Sheldon, but the past week had been so stressful with him trying to at least work at home, and taking care of the twins  _and_  Sheldon that he was about to blow a fuse. He loved the twins, he really did, but when the gods of genetics rolled a dice and it landed on 'picky,' it was enough to rival Sheldon's captiousness. Penny had already taught him how to deal with the kids, and he was slowly learning how to take care of them. He was getting better at taking care of kids, and he was proud of that.

Then there was Sheldon; the other kid he was babysitting.

"Taking care of me?" Sheldon raised an eyebrow, "I hardly think that you are 'taking care' of me. It's more like I'm taking care of you."

Raj saw the look in Leonard's eye and knew that he had snapped. He quickly signaled to Howard who lifted Andy while Raj silently got up to get Maddie. Neither Sheldon nor Leonard noticed that they had got up and silently left the apartment. He didn't want the twins to get traumatized by shouting, or two adult looking people fighting over something they wouldn't even understand.

"Taking care of me?!" Leonard angrily repeated, his temper boiling at an alarming rate. He was so fed up with Sheldon and his arrogant self! "Fine! Let's say that you are taking care of  _me_ , I've been taking care of the twins ever since they came! Do you think that's easy?"

"Yes, and from the looks of it," Sheldon eyed the laptop screen, he saw some kind of movement, "they're pretty user friendly."

Leonard slammed his container on the coffee table, causing pieces of food to fall off from the intensity. "THAT'S IT! THEY ARE NOT AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE, SHELDON!" Unbeknownst to the two fighting roommates, even at the second floor landing, Howard and Raj heard the shouting, and moved down to the lobby. "IF YOU'RE SO GREAT, WHY DON'T YOU TAKE CARE OF THE TWINS, HUH? CAUSE YOU'RE JUST SO EXCELLENT AT EVERYTHING!"

Sheldon licked his lips, nodding curtly, "Alright then, that seems like a simple enough task." Leonard might think that he couldn't do it, but he could. He was Homo Novus, he was better than all of them, and he could most definitely handle two toddlers. This was another step in his plan of foiling Leonard's imbecilic ploy of getting Penny back. If he succeeds, not only did he get to stop this tomfoolery of babysitting, but he would also prove that he was right. He could also already feel the amusement he'd get once Leonard gets all mad and upset that his plans to win Penny back by taking care of her children crashes and burns. "I find no problems with doing so, and agree to takeover for a week. Mostly to prove you wrong."

"Alone," Leonard said the word slowly, his gaze slowly softening at the sound of someone clearing their throat. He sighed, turning towards his laptop, and saw a groggy looking Penny, "Hey Penny, good mo—"

"It's four in the morning and I am not a morning person, Leonard, you don't have to be so loud!" The blonde crankily said, running a hand through her hair, "and why the hell is it so bright?" Penny shielded her eyes with her arm, it seemed like Penny had just woken up.

* * *

 **Tuesday;**  6 days until end of task.

* * *

Sheldon watched as Leonard shuffled around the apartment, preparing for his return to work.

"—so I already called President Siebert, and told him that you're going to be using a week of your vacation days."

"And what did he say? I'm sure he was puzzled and upset as to why I won't be gracing the university with my presence." Sheldon said from his desk, checking the email from Penny that Leonard forwarded to him. The twins' schedule could somewhat coincide with his, and he was currently thinking of how to change it.

Leonard closed the closet door, and fixed his jacket. "To be honest, he sounded really happy, and I called in at six a.m. He also said that he's more than willing to allow you that remaining week of vacation days if you want."

Sheldon waved a hand at him, "nonsense. I only need a week to prove that I am right, and you know what it will mean if I'm right." Leonard frowned at him, and he simply smiled, pointing a pen at him. "Not only do I get to ship the twins back to their mother, but I also get your limited edition Batmobile miniature replica!" He grinned at his roommate, who simply shrugged and placed his laptop in his bag. "Well, you're not getting any results until next week. You know what to do, right?"

Leonard waited, and was met by the patented 'you must be stupid to think I can't do it because I excel at everything' head shake. "Of course I do. I still have about an hour before they wake up. Enough time to continue my current research. " Sheldon stared at him. "Aren't you going to leave, yet?"

"I'm leaving, I'm leaving," Leonard said, raising his hands and backing up before making his way towards the door. "Good luck on your first day babysitting. Bye "

Sheldon snorted as the door closed. "Luck. Pfft. Like I'd need luck." He let out a small chuckle as he thought of how many wins he'd get within a week. A signed Silver Surfer surfboard from Raj once he finishes building his Lego Death Star, a limited edition miniature Batmobile replica, and the twins will be out of his metaphorical hair! DC, Marvel, maybe he'd even force Leonard to get him something cool from Dark Horse comics, or from anime/manga. He was going to—metaphorically—wipe the floor with them as Dr. Sheldon Cooper was one hell of a winner. Once the twins were shipped off to France, he would finally be able to conclude his theory on whether or not Leonard was only babysitting Penny's progenies to get back together with her.

He laughed at the thought. Leonard's plans were always so gullible and entertaining—but only when it fails. Which he will.

Although he had an odd connection with Penny's progenies, he still—in no way—liked the thought of them staying with them. Due to the infants temporarily lodging with them, Leonard decided postponing paintball as they couldn't leave the twins all alone in an apartment. He was okay with the thought, but then realized that if the twins were left by themselves, there was a huge possibility that they would play with his action figures. Or worse; they would somehow stumble into his room and would make their way through his comic books! Thousands of dollars worth of comic books tarnished due to an infant scribbling over it via crayons, or tearing it page by page or dribbling on it! It was the only thing that stopped him from leaving the twins and going to work. All he had to do was feed them, turn the channel to either Disney or Nick jr., then lock the door and proceed to the university. It was relatively easy, but so was breaking into his room as Howard had installed a sensor button that would open Leonard's, his and the bathroom's door if the twins ever touched it.

If the children from Rugrats could get lost in a forest due to the adults ignoring them; who could say that it wouldn't happen to the twins? Even if they did somehow survived!

His trance was broken by the feeling of something hard connecting with the side of his arm again and again. He tried to ignore it as he scrunched his face up, attempting to focus on his work. Sheldon continued to ignore it; as he might just have been hallucinating. But as the smacking of an object against his arm continued, he realized that he wasn't hallucinating, and that he wasn't alone. He had momentarily forgotten that he had foolishly fallen into Leonard's trap of getting him to watch over the twins. And since they were the only ones home with him, he assumed that the constant assault on his arm was somehow related to either of the infants.

And sure enough, the moment he turned his head, he saw that Maddie was poking him repeatedly in the arm with the remote control for the television, an annoyed and frustrated look on her face as she attempted to get his attention. Andy was on his tiny couch, watching them curiously and he briefly wondered how long the toddler had tried to get his attention. Maybe she had been saying his name, but he had been drowning everything out to focus on his proposal. With a small huff, he lifted his fingers off of the keyboard and turned his chair to face the infant.

"You're awake?" Was the first of many questions he wanted to ask. Maddie nodded, and he continued. "What do you want?"

Maddie blinked at him, her hand holding out the remote. "On tv, peas. Bues Coos."

"Blues Clues? The show where a mad man talks to supposedly inanimate animated objects that should be sent to an asylum?"

"Asah-lam?" Andy tilted his head to the side, while Maddie poked the remote on his arm again. "Bues Coos, peas!"

Sheldon rolled his eyes as he took the remote, pressing the power button to make the infants go away. The tv immediately turned on and he changed it to Nickelodeon where the said show was playing. He watched Maddie hurried to her couch, practically throwing herself on it as the insane man started dancing while making his way towards a red arm chair. He heard the twins singing along to a song about a letter before drowning them out yet again. It appeared that they were already content on watching the show, and he continued on to focusing on his work. It was around nine when he felt another assault on his arm.

"What do you want now?" He asked stoically, barely tearing his gaze from his laptop.

"Sedon, Andy and Maddie want eat." It was Andy, this time. "Peas make befast?"

Sheldon sighed in irritation and swiveled his chair back to the twins. He closed his eyes and recalled their supposed breakfast for the day, based on their mother's e-mail. "Pancakes, am I correct?" The toddler nodded happily, and Sheldon proceeded to stand up. Once he fed them, they would go on their merry way and he could go back to his work. He made his way to the kitchen and brought out the ingredients. Making pancakes was fairly easy, and he was sure that his would be the best pancakes those children would ever taste.

He was about to crack an egg when he felt someone tugging on his shirt.

"We hep?" Maddie asked as he craned his neck to look at the two toddlers. He hadn't noticed that the two were fairly tall for the age; they were a little past his thighs standing at an estimate of 36 inches. The math suggested that they would be tall when they grow up. "Miks battah!" Andy exclaimed, pointing up to the counter.

Sheldon eyed the counter island cautiously. The counter was not big enough for both of them to sit on, and for preparing their breakfast. He then eyed the two stools at the other side of the counter. If he placed them there, there was 99.9% chance that they would fall off, given that Zippy was too energetic, and mainly because a single un-calculated move could lead to a concussion. Or an untimely death. Although he was not overtly fond with the twins as his friends were, he did not wish for them to have any accidents leading to a tragic death. One blow to the head from the height of the stool could be crucial, and so he decided against it. Plus, the blame would be place on him, and he didn't want that.

"I'm afraid you can't help," he said and the twins frowned, "please return to your respective spots and wait for your breakfast."

"Peaspeaspeaspeaspeaspeaspeas?" Maddie pouted, and Sheldon furrowed his eyebrows. "Again, there is an l in please." He picked up the temporarily abandoned egg, and cracked it. "But I'll compromise," he glanced at them as he cracked another egg, "if you behave and allow me to finish these, I'll give you cookies."

"Ookies!"

"Ookies!"

Sheldon winced as they happily babbled about the cookies on their way back to their couches. Like their mother, they could easily be bribed with food. Another thing they inherited from her. " _Ookies_ ," he shook his head, as he mixed the pancake batter, "how gullible."

Once he was done, he decided to serve the twins their breakfast. He added blueberries on top, as Penny said to add fruits and that the twins liked blueberries, and just enough pancake syrup that was drizzled into the Flash and the Green Lantern's symbols. It was a masterpiece, and he knew that the toddlers would be amazed at what may be the best breakfast they would ever have. And, since he was such a generous person, he would let them use their bottle one last time before he disposed of them. They weren't going to progress in life if they couldn't even drink from a cup. At least they could use utensils.

"Bon appetite," he said as he placed a plate in front of the twins, and a bottle of milk for each.

Andy grinned at the food in front of him while Maddie frowned, scrutinizing the pancakes. Sully's frown deepened then she turned to her twin, crossing her arms, "Maddie no want."

"What?" Sheldon asked, glancing at his wonderful display of food then at the complaining toddler. "What do you mean you're not going to eat? In front of you is a plate of perfectly made blueberry pancakes! With the Green Lantern's symbol made with syrup. And I rarely cook for  _anyone_. You should be happy to even get the opportunity to taste my cooking!"

The toddler looked up at him, and blue eyes met blue.

Sheldon suddenly felt an odd sense of familiarity as he glared back at the toddler. He couldn't put his finger on it, but there was something about how she glared knowingly at him that made him feel déjà vu. It was like he had seen that look before, but somehow, his eidetic memory was failing him. Was it Penny's glare? It wasn't, as the toddler's glare was much more intense and intimidating that he suddenly wanted to allow the toddler to do what she wanted. Not that he was afraid of the toddler—he wasn't—but he just wanted to get it over with; he had far more important things to do.

"Fine. What is wrong with what I made?" He growled as he tore his gaze away from the still unhappy toddler.

Maddie pointed a finger at the stack of pancakes, "fuh-root  _in_ pun-kiks."

Oh.

_Oh._

He straightened his back and scurried to his laptop and re-read what Penny said in her e-mail.

"Make sure that the fruits are  _inside_  the pancakes and the waffles, or else Maddie won't eat it. Andy will eat mostly anything, but Maddie will refuse anything that isn't up to her standards." Sheldon blinked at his laptop, then glanced at the twins over his shoulder. Andy was happily eating the pancakes while Maddie sat beside him, her gaze locked on the untouched pancakes. "What exactly do you want me to do?"

Maddie slowly turned her head to him, her frown still evident on her face. Another traitq she must have inherited from her mother, Sheldon thought. Stubbornness. "Make new."

 _Make new ones?_  Was this child insane? He didn't even take orders from Leonard, why would he, an accomplished, well-respected physicist and future Nobel laureate, obey a toddler's orders? One that couldn't even form coherent sentences, too! It was unbelievable, and if only their mother wasn't Penny, he would do something about it. So, he huffed, googled his problem, then stood up and marched to the kitchen to grab a plate and a fork of his own. Then he took the leftover pancakes he was saving for Leonard (it was an unspoken rule between them that if one were to cook, they would save some for the other) and placed it on his plate before making his way to his spot.

"Maddie," he said as he sat down, placing the plate on his lap. It was a good thing that Tuesdays just so happened to be Pancake day. He wasn't hungry—but had no plans on making another batch of pancakes; unless this plan wouldn't work, but the commenters said that sitting down and eating with children helped. This could be seen as an experiment. He may also owe Leonard an apology for how he reacted the night before. The darn toddler  _was_  picky, and had he not commented about it, he wouldn't be stuck in this mess. "Will me eating, somehow make you want to eat?"

The toddler looked up at him in confusion, and he simply lifted his plate. "Shall we have breakfast?" He quietly sliced a portion of the pancake, stabbed a couple of blueberries with the end of his fork and started eating. He was such a great cook.

Maddie glanced at the stack of pancakes, then up at Sheldon then at her twin brother who was drinking milk. "It good?" She asked, waiting for her twin to stop drinking. Andy grinned, nodding then stabbing his fork back down on the stack of pancakes. "It deh-ishas!"

"I recommend that you eat it now before it gets cold," Sheldon remarked, taking another bite of pancakes as Maddie sighed. Slowly, she picked up her fork, and stabbed a blueberry on top of a pancake triangle. With slight hesitation, she brought the fork to her mouth and ate it. Sheldon raised an eyebrow, "what is your opinion on it?"

"It deh-ishas!" Maddie grinned up at him, and Sheldon silently thanked the internet and whoever answered the question in Yahoo Answers. He would give that user a good rating.

* * *

"Hey Sheldon, are you ready to go?"

Sheldon was in the middle of shutting his laptop off when Leonard arrived to pick the three of them up for dinner. Tuesday nights were no longer spent at The Cheesecake Factory, and was instead held at the restaurant Raj discovered that served an array of food. He had originally gone against the idea of changing restaurants at first, but only Penny or Bernadette could serve his burger, no one else. However, both were gone from the restaurant, and Leonard was too attached to it, that they had to find a new Tuesday burger joint. As luck would have it (though, he didn't believe in luck) Raj found the restaurant, and their barbecue, bacon, cheeseburger was beyond acceptable. Which was actually much better than The Cheesecake Factory.

"Yes, I was just turning off my laptop."

"How was the first day of babysitting?" Leonard scanned the room; there were no messes or anything misplaced. He had originally thought that all hell would break loose once he closed the front door, and he would come home to find Sheldon finally going insane, and a receipt for Sheldon somehow finding a way to ship the twins to France. Instead, the apartment was tidy, Sheldon seemed like the Sheldon definition of normal, and the twins were  _dressed_  out of their pajamas and into outerwear. "You manage to give them a bath?"

"It was relatively easy, and I found no difficulties." The theoretical physicist smugly grinned as he slipped his arms through his windbreaker. His first day of the task started off a bit rocky, with Maddie refusing to eat pancakes  _with_  blueberries, but other than that everything went smoothly. After breakfast, the twins continued watching their cartoons, then went off to play in their playpen. Around lunchtime, there were no problems with what they ate; meatballs (made with mostly vegetables thanks to a website he found) with tomato sauce, with a side of bread and sliced carrots. Though, he did have some difficulty with getting them to eat carrots, but once he sliced them into tiny pieces and hid them in the soup, they completely forgot about it. Once they were all settled, he gave them a bath, which was a task that he found surprisingly easy to do.

As he was a hygiene enthusiast, he wanted their new inhabitants to be clean. It was quite a surprise that all he needed was to place his Death Star rubber boat in the tub, then the toddlers would no longer protest. It was a puzzlement how Leonard found the task of bathing the twins to be so tedious. It took him about an hour to clean both of them up—though he had some difficulty with Maddie—and got them to take their nap. While they slept, he continued working on his grant proposal, and even enjoyed a round of playing L.A. Noir before the twins woke up again. They played again (they never seemed to get tired of playing) then he got them to change into their outdoor clothes. Which reminded him that he needed to get them nicer clothes, like superhero shirts. Penny's choice of clothing for her children were foolish and composed of dresses and cardigans and fancy clothes that he decided that they needed more comfortable clothes. Again, like superhero shirts.

"Of course I gave them a bath. They have to be washed before we leave, Leonard."

"And you didn't have a hard time at giving them a bath?" Leonard asked incredulously, shocked that the anti-bathing toddlers agreed to a bath. "Why yes! Like the entire first day, it was easy. They didn't even resist, and are now clean and spiffy." The bespectacled man stayed silent for a moment, glancing at the twins who were busy molding new clay sculptures on the couch. Maybe, Sheldon really could take care of the twins. Which was beyond confusing, as Sheldon  _detested_  children.

"Okay," he drawled, walking over to the couch and getting the twins' attention. "Come on now, guys we're going out for dinner."

Maddie snatched the odd shaped sculpture from Andy's hands and placed it on the coffee table, along with hers, as Andy protested. "Andy was making Sedon!"

"Eat," Maddie said, pointing at Leonard, "toohs-dee dinnah."

"Fine," Andy grumbled, sliding down the couch to the floor along with his twin. He looked at Sheldon, "Sedon eat?"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow as he opened the front door, "of course. Plus, Leonard is going to have to give me a prize for having a splendid first day." He smirked at Leonard, who simply winced. "Yeah, sure, sure."

It was just the first day, a lot of things could change until Monday. So, Sheldon could be arrogant now, but Leonard knew that this was just the start.

* * *

 **Wednesday;** 5 days until end of task.

* * *

_"Can you tell me where the map is?"_

"Da map is in da bag!"

"Da bag, Do-uh! Da bag!"

_"Where's the map?"_

Sheldon yanked his sleeping mask off his face as he sat up on his bed. He swore that he could hear voices coming from the living room. He glanced at his alarm clock and saw that it was  _five in the morning_. He wasn't supposed to get up until  _seven_  for what most simpletons would call a 'good night's sleep' and not having enough would lead to impaired cognitive function. It was five hours past midnight, and there were no movie, game, online marathon or other agreed upon events, yet he could hear the television.

With a huff, he slipped his robe on and marched into the living room with a deep frown. "Leonard, it is an hour and forty seven minutes before your supposed—" he stopped at the entrance to the hall at the sight of the twins' eyes glued to the television as they sat atop a sleeping Leonard. "Why are the two of you awake?"

Maddie slowly twisted her head to face him—which somewhat reminded of characters in horror movies—her blue eyes wide as if she was getting hypnotized. "Do-uh da expo-wah."

"Dora? The explorer?" The toddler nodded, and he pursed his lips. He knew that show, it was a children's show that his niece used to watch. "Isn't that the show where a child with horrible parents—that should be reported to the proper authorities—travels without supervision while talking to various animals and at the same time can't seem to remember where she placed various objects, and figure out the difference between a forest and a lake?" Maddie blinked up at him, and he continued. "The little girl who should be sent to a therapist and get a second opinion considering a lifetime in Camarillo State Mental Hospital?"

"Huh?" Maddie tilted her head to the side, before Andy tugged on her sleeve. "Do-uh need hep!" Maddie nodded, clenching her tiny fists in excitement then returning her gaze to the television and yelling with Andy. "Sipuh no siping! Sipuh no siping! Sipuh no siping!"

Sheldon squinted his eyes at the television, then moved to grab the remote from the coffee table and turned the television off. "It is time for you two to sleep. This has made me realize that the gates are ineffective, and shall result in further inspection. Now, get off of Leonard and march back to your rooms." He waited for them to move, but they didn't budge.

"Hey! I told the both of you that it's time to sleep!"

"Maddie no want seep! Do-uh need hep, Maddie and Andy hep!" Maddie spat, shaking Leonard's arm to wake him up. "Uncah Wenad, Sedon make tv go bye bye!"

Leonard, still half asleep, slowly opened his eyes and yawned. "What?"

Andy shook his arm, again, "Sedon make tv go bye bye!"

"Sheldon," Leonard groaned, placing a hand above his face, trying to comprehend what was happening. "Don't make the tv go bye bye, or else we won't test out those robots that Howard made on Saturday."

The theoretical physicist stilled, then folded his arms. "Leonard, you are not seriously blackmailing me. Sheldroid will be tested when I want it to be tested, not because you said so."

"Keep that up and only the Hofstadtron will be battling Robopalli and Wolobot. The winner gets the other robot, and will be allowed to fuse with it."

There was a moment of silence and Leonard sighed in content. "There is a limit to your threats, Leonard, and one day, I'm sure you'll run out of them." Sheldon hissed as he pressed the power button on the remote, the sound of the delusional little girl's voice booming into the room. "There, are you happy?"

Leonard nodded, nestling his head on his pillow. "Yep, good enough."

With one last glare at the twins and Leonard, he walked back to his room and lied down. He needed to go back to sleep, but all he could do was stare up at the ceiling. He tried to count how many Beasts jumped over a fence; listed his favorite Marvel superheroes in order of strongest to weakest, listed his favorite DC superheroes in order of importance, listed his favorite Batwomen, stated all of the reasons why Firefly shouldn't have been cancelled, thought of all of the inconsistencies in the original Spiderman movies, mentally made a proper dissection of the new Amazing Spiderman movie (which he would post online later) and had imagined all of the cool superhero clothes he would make the twins wear. But after all that, sleep still eluded him. It was now ten minutes past six, and was still not the right time to be awake.

He was finding it impossible to sleep with the racket outside; the television was raised to the max volume and the toddlers were singing as loudly as they could. He could use his noise canceling headphones, but he was still charging them. All he could do was sigh, and try as hard as he could to return to sleep. A nap would be good enough to patch up the gap in his REM cycle, and he decided that it was what he needed. And soon enough, he was dozing off.

_Bang, bang, bang!_

"Sedon?"

_Bang, bang, bang!_

"Sedon?"

"Ignore them; and they'll go away." Sheldon sleepily muttered, shutting his eyes tightly.

_Bang, bang, bang!_

"Sedon?"

There was another moment of silence, and he started to drift off again. Sadly, it was barely a minute later when something tugged his blanket from his body. Curse Howard and his confounded easy open door button! He angrily sat up on his bed and flicked the switch on his lamp. If he was going to intimidate children into sleeping, he was going to do it with light on.

"What do you want, now?" Sheldon tiredly growled at the two toddlers standing near the edge of his bed.

"We hungy," Maddie said, pointing a finger to her clothed stomach.

It was  _hours_  before their supposed wake up time, much less their breakfast time! "Why don't you ask Leonard to feed you?"

Andy frowned, "Uncah Wenad say dat Sedon make befast."

Sheldon stared at the children in disbelief and grabbed his phone to check the email that Penny sent him. There was no definite time for breakfast. That means that they ate whenever they felt like eating, or rather, when they were hungry. Like now. He grunted in irritation before swinging his legs to the side of his bed, "let me just make this clear, this will be the  _last_  time that you will ever wake me up for such an asinine reason, ever again. Do you understand?"

The twins turned to each other, shrugged, then turned back to him. "Okay!"

It was a bit too late to admit to himself, but he strongly regretted taunting Leonard and putting himself in this position.

* * *

Damn those twins, damn them times infinity.

Sheldon usually did not subject himself to using profanity, but he was just so infuriated that he couldn't help it. He could accept them annoying him while he was working, or maybe waking him at a such an early hour that he could no longer go back to sleep. Anything  _but_  what they had force him to do!

They made him skip  _comic book night_. And that wasn't the worst of all, no! The worst thing was that, apparently, a production assistant that worked on The Dark Knight was going to drop by and spill some spoilers about the new movie. He didn't care if the others would fill him out on all of the details, he wanted to be the one to ask all of the logical questions that none of them would come up with! Like if there were any plans of a Superman versus Batman movie in the near future! None of them was going to ask that. Instead, they were going to ask about Robin and Catwoman and all of the other vanilla questions that was already answerable via the internet.

Which was why instead of sulking on not getting to meet the production assistant, he again, worked on his grant proposal. It was almost done, and simply needed some polishing. He wouldn't be surprised if he was already another step closer to a Nobel. It was the main reason why he had been so busy working this past year. With the discovery of the Higgs Boson, physics was making a giant leap forward and—

"Ask Sedon!"

"But Sedon say no!"

"Go ask!"

"Why are the two of you creating such a ruckus when I specifically said not to bother me?" He stared at the bickering siblings, a small scowl of disapproval on his face. It was just his second day of taking care of the twins, and though the first day went smoothly, today did not. Due to them ruining his sleep, he had been awake since five that morning, and he had been working nonstop on his research ever since. Not only did they deprive him of sleep, they also did not falter at annoying him throughout the entire day. Andy with his constant questioning of what he was working on, and Maddie constantly prodding for him to continue building the 'Det Stah.' Then when Leonard and the guys arrived that afternoon to pick them up to go to the comic book store, they threw a tantrum saying that they didn't want to go.

Maddie pointed a finger at her twin brother accusingly, "Andy want sum-ting!"

Sheldon moved his gaze to Andy, who was shuffling his feet. "And what is it that you want?"

Andy wrung his hands then lifted his gaze up to him. "Andy want ice ceam, peas?"

"Ice cream? You want ice cream?" Sheldon narrowed his eyes and Andy nervously nodded, looking at his twin for support. "You haven't had dinner yet, and it will ruin your appetites."

Maddie tapped a finger on her chin, deeply thinking, then looked up at him. "Maddie want ice ceam, too."

"Your mother will not be happy to hear that you had dessert before dinner. It is said to ruin your appetite, and I do not want to shoulder any blame of such." Sheldon crossed his arms, and noticed how Maddie stilled and mirrored his stance, crossing her tiny arms. This toddler inherited her mother's stubbornness, and attitude, multiplied by a thousand. When she wanted something,  _really_  wanted something, she wouldn't give up until she didn't get what she wanted. Leonard always knuckled under for the toddler, and had spoiled her. He didn't know why, but Leonard always did. But he wouldn't. The little toddler could try with all her might, but no facial expression would make him obey her orders. "My answer, is no."

Then the blonde toddler stepped forward, and did what Sheldon never expected her to do.

She cried.

"Why are you crying?" He shrieked bolting from his chair and crouching down to the weeping toddler. He knew that she was only crying to get what she wanted, but he couldn't handle tears! Even if she knew that they were fake, tears made him uneasy and uncomfortable. Maddie's tears made his stomach drop, his heat clench, and he badly wanted to give her a hot beverage. He desperately wanted her to stop crying as each second only made him feel worse, and he wasn't dong anything wrong! But... the only way to make her stop crying was to give in and give her what she wanted. Curses. He really had to get used to seeing either of these toddlers cry, as he was sure that their tears were fake most of the time.

Sheldon sighed heavily, he just really wanted to get this over with. They were already dressed to leave, and maybe he did want some ice cream, as well. "Will you stop crying if we go out for ice cream?"

Maddie sniffled, wiping her face with her sleeve then beamed up at him. The nerve of this child. "Yes! Maddie want ice ceam!" She turned to her brother who was grinning and happily clapped his hands in delight. "Ice ceam! Ice ceam!"

"You're lucky that there's an ice creamery just down the street that I approve of." He slipped his windbreaker on, grabbed his wallet and took his keys from the bowl then opened the door. "Their ice cream is creamy, but they also have a non-dairy ice cream that Leonard enjoys. You might like their chocolate ice cream, it's excellent."

The twins ran over to him, before he locked the door. Leonard always had his key with him, and he knew that they wouldn't stay too long at the ice creamery. He turned around and found Maddie staring up at him. Sheldon also realized that this was the first time that the three of them went somewhere without the others. "And what do you want now?"

Maddie blinked, then raised her arms. "Is that some sort of expression of gratitude?" Sheldon asked, and the toddler shook her head, extending her arms up at him. "Maddie up, peas?"

"You want me to carry  _you_?" Sheldon stared down at the twenty one month old toddler who was raising her tiny arms up at him, then at her twin brother who seemed to be affronted by the idea. Heavy lifting was not his forte (nor was it anyone else's in their group) which was why he declared Leonard as the muscle, by default. However, looking at the toddler again, she didn't seem too heavy. Leonard seemed to be able to do it, and could even carry both of them at the same time for at least five minutes before putting one of them down. Even Raj and Howard could do it, and the two of them together—even with Leonard—couldn't even beat him at Trestling! If they could, then there was no doubt about it that he could, too. Although, he was a bit nervous, as he really might injure himself, like when he lifted that unbelievably heavy encyclopedia.

Sheldon slowly leaned forward, stretching his arms towards her, and picked her up.

Maybe he finally got superhuman strength! ... That was scientifically impossible, and he was embarrassed to even have thought of the idea. But it was the only plausible explanation on why Maddie was currently perched on his left arm, and why he hadn't thrown his back out. Then again, the others could do it, so he could, too. He shifted his gaze to Andy, who was silent the entire time. "Do you want to be carried as well?"

Andy frowned and shook his head, "no! Andy not baby!" Maddie shot her twin a look from Sheldon's arm, "Maddie not baby! Maddie jus' want up."

"Alright, stop fighting," Sheldon hissed, grabbing Andy's tiny hand and proceeding to walk down the stairs. "The two of you should avoid fighting, as it really does irritate me to an extent. Fight again, and we will turn around and return to the apartment." Maddie made a zipping gesture over her mouth and Andy simply tightened his hold on his hand. Once they reached the second floor landing, Andy spoke again, "wat ice ceam Sedon wike da most?"

"Chocolate is my favorite flavor," he said as Andy released his hand, jumping down each step.

"Andy wike choc-et too!" Andy chirped, taking a big jump from the last step of the stairs down to the ground of the first floor. "Maddie wike ookies and ceam," Maddie stated, smiling up at him, "wike mommy!" He tilted his head to the side as he pushed the door open with his free hand, "isn't Penny's favorite strawberry ice cream?"

Andy spun around, nodding excitedly, "mommy wikes both!"

Sheldon watched as Andy ran up to a bench next to the building, greeting the pigeons that were sitting on top of it, then scurried back to him once he saw a lady walking their way. "Mrs. Gunderson, good evening, or as I call it, pre-evening." He calmly said as Mrs. Gunderson, the old lady from apartment 3A, strolled towards them, her white pet poodle at her side.

"Sheldon dear, I didn't know you had children!" The old lady animatedly placed a hand over her chest, then nodded her head towards Maddie who was sitting on his arm, then at Andy who was hiding behind his legs. He vigorously shook his head, while Mrs. Gunderson's dog started to sniff Andy, causing him to step back. "Oh no, I'm afraid you're mistaken, Mrs. Gunderson. These are not my children, they're Penny's children." The old lady looked to be in thought, trying to recall their former neighbor. "The one who used to date my roommate, and resided in 4B?"

Mrs. Gunderson nodded happily, finally remembering the girl. "Ah yes! The sweet blonde girl that stars in Halfway there! I'm a big fan of that show, and I can't believe I forgotten about living in the same building with her. I can't believe these beautiful children are hers, but I've seen them on gossip shows before! My, it seems just like yesterday that we would exchange pleasantries at the lobby before she scurried to get to the Cheesecake Factory for her shift!" She stepped closer to him, and reached out to gently pinch Maddie's (who blinked at the stranger) cheeks. "Are they Leonard's?"

Sheldon furrowed his eyebrows as he pondered the question. Were they Leonard's offsprings? But they call him uncle... but it was possible that it's just a setup to ensure that he doesn't find out. However, why would Leonard hide the fact that he had children? "No, they are not," his eyes darted at Maddie then at Andy before looking back at his neighbor to offer her a small, unsure smile. Andy started laughing as the little white dog started licking his face, tearing him away from his skeptic thoughts. He could theorize about it later. "Well, whoever their father is, he must have beautiful eyes. I know that Penny doesn't have those eyes," she patted Maddie's head then gently tugged on her dog's leash. "Come on now, Marsha, it's time to go home." The dog gave a small bark of understanding, and stepped closer to her owner. "It was nice seeing you, three."

The three watched as the old lady walked into the apartment before retrieving his sanitizer from his pocket and handed it to Andy. "Put some on your hand, then apply it on your cheeks." Andy did as he was told, then returned his hold on Sheldon's hand. He winced at the return of contact, but he saw that the toddler had thoroughly sanitized his hands. "Sedon get ice ceam, now?" They started walking, and he shifted Maddie—who was watching cars pass by—on his arm. "Of course. Scryer's has the best ice cream out there. It's clean, too."

* * *

Leonard quickly opened the door, then checked his watch—there was still time!

"Sheldon!" He glanced around the apartment, frantically searching for his roommate. "Sheldon, where the hell are you? Twins, hello?"

The experimental physicist abandoned the living room and made his way towards the bedrooms. He stopped at Sheldon's bedroom, he might be asleep or watching a movie on Netflix. "Hey, Sheldon! Sheldon! Sheldon!" He waited for a response, and found none. Somewhat worried, he opened the door—hoping that Sheldon wouldn't do his monthly fingerprint check on the doorknob to see who tried to get into his room—and found no one. He moved to his bedroom, and swung the door open. "Sheldon?" He scanned the room, it was still in the state it was before he left the apartment. The three of them must have left, which was shocking as Sheldon seemed to not want anything to do with the twins. Maybe he really was okay with the twins. But that gigantic leap of progress did not matter, as something much, much,  _much_ more important was happening!

Raj practically stumbled up the stairs and scrambled to get into apartment 4A. "Dude! Where is he?"

Leonard sprinted from his bedroom and into the living room. "I don't know, they must have gone out. I don't see them anywhere, and his wallet isn't on his table or in his room."

The astrophysicist groaned, "how is it that Sheldon is missing at the same time that William Shatner drops by Suart's store?!"

"Is Howard still holding up our spots in line?" Leonard worriedly asked, looking around the apartment again, in hopes of Sheldon magically appearing. Instead of the production assistant from The Dark Knight, it was  _William Shatner_  who visited the store for a signing. "Yeah, but he said that the line is moving pretty quick, so we gotta go quickly!"

Leonard frowned in regret, and grabbed all of their Star Trek memorabilia. "I'll just get something signed for him. Now let's go, or else we won't get anything signed!"

* * *

Sheldon swung the apartment door open, allowing the slightly sleepy toddlers to walk in. "I apologize if we're late; the line at Scryer's was excruciatingly long and it took us about half an hour to get inside." He closed the door and tossed his keys into the bowl, "it was a good thing that their ice cream is magnificent or else I would have found a way to run them down. My sharp comments got another bakery to close, you know." The twins then made their way to their respective chairs, and started to rub their full tummies.

"Oh no, we just got back about ten to twenty minutes ago," Leonard said, holding his excitement down as he pushed the container towards Sheldon, "eat up while it's not cold, then we'll start HALO night."

Sheldon nodded his head, walking to the kitchen to place an ice cream tub in the freezer. "I'm afraid the twins won't be able to eat anymore. Scryer's had an all-you-can-eat ice cream buffet, and they ate like there was no tomorrow. I fear that this mistake will heavily ruin their appetite for the days to come. "

"That must've been fun. Their non-dairy ice cream is great," Leonard commented, taking another bite of his food. Raj nodded in agreement, "they do have great ice cream. We should go there sometime soon."

Howard lifted his eyebrows, glancing at the box filled with collectibles that was sitting beside the couch. "Speaking of soon, why didn't you answer any of our calls? I asked William Shatner to wait for you for like five freaking minutes, just so he could say hi!"

The theoretical physicist paused, closed the freezer door then turned to face his friends. "William Shatner? What do you mean William Shatner?" He stared at the three men who were gaping at him; he had left his phone here.

"Apparently, there really was no production assistant," Leonard started, carefully watching Sheldon's reaction to what he was about to say. "Instead it was William Shatner, who arrived for a surprise signing." Sheldon's expression dropped, and it was as if the life was sucked out of his roommate. "He was there to sign anything Star Trek related, or Boston Legal related, then Raj and I came back for you, but the three of you were gone. Then once we got back to the comic book store, Howard tried calling you to at least get William Shatner to say hi to you. But we did get him to say something in your voicemail."

Sheldon immediately leapt to his desk, his eyes wide and his teeth clenched as he fumbled with his phone. He had missed  _the_  William Shatner, live and in person! He could imagine all of the questions he would ask him, and all the laughs they would share once he realized that he was the greatest Star Trek fan out there. Then his mind wandered to all of the Star Trek memorabilia he would've gotten him to sign, and the picture he could've took with him that he would use as his Facebook profile photo! He skimmed past the forty messages from his friends and opened his voicemail, putting his phone in max volume.

"Hey, Sheldon, this is William Shatner! It's a shame that you couldn't be here to meet me, your friends said that you're a big fan of Star Trek, and I wanted to meet you myself. I even heard of you from Leonard Nimoy, and his restraining order! Well, anyway, I just wanted to say hi, and that I hope we'd meet in person one day. Live long and prosper!"

"Pos-puh?" Andy repeated, turning to his twin. "Wat dat?"

"Who Wi-yam Satter?" Maddie asked Leonard, who was still nervous about Sheldon's reaction.

Howard and Raj watched ominously as Sheldon repeatedly played the voicemail, with a haunted, empty look on his face. Raj took a deep breath, the last time something like this happened was when Sheldon got a court order from the Pasadena jail. Sheldon was beyond angry when he had missed Stan Lee, and they weren't sure on how he would react about William Shatner. With as much courage as he could muster, Raj asked something none of them wanted to ask. "Sheldon?"

"What!" Sheldon snapped, a haunted look on his face.

"Are you okay?" Raj asked before flinching at the intensity of Sheldon's gaze. "We got him to sign some of your things for you."

"No, I am not okay. And next time,  _do not_  touch my belongings without my permission." He hissed and marched to his room. This was just like the time that he was thrown in jail for driving Penny to the hospital. He had missed Stan Lee, and received a restraining order, because of Penny. Now, because of Penny's offsprings, he missed William Shatner! For ice cream! If he hadn't succumb to the female toddler's wants, he might have been there when Leonard came back for him. He would have met William Shatner in person, instead of wasting time standing in line just to eat ice cream! Just like their mother, the twins were somehow ruining his happiness. Had the three of them stayed away from him, he would have met Stan Lee (and ate frozen yoghurt with him) and William Shatner. A lousy voicemail wasn't going to make up for the loss of not meeting him in person, nor would signed collectibles.

Well, it would, but it did not remove the fact that he was seriously regretting ever agreeing to taking care of these children.

He still had four days to put up with them.


	4. The Takeover - Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To prove Leonard wrong, Sheldon babysits the twins by himself.

**Thursday;**  4 days until end of task.

* * *

"It's fairly simple, just decide on whether or not you'll buy a property."

Andy gave Sheldon a confused look, then stared at the subject of discussion. "Andy no get it."

Sheldon sighed in irritation; how hard was it to understand the rules of Monopoly? It started earlier that morning when the children refused to play with their toys, claiming that they were bored with them. Then he allowed them to play their toddler games on the Wii, but after a few minutes, they again claimed that they didn't want to play. His first thought was to ignore them, but ignoring the two never led to anything beneficial, so he instead tried teaching them more complex games. They started with Jenga (he considered giant Jenga but it was too dangerous) but Maddie kept making the tower fall whenever it was Andy's turn. They then moved to Snakes N' Ladders, but Andy kept insisting that he was to ride the ladder, when he landed on snakes. They then moved to chess, but both couldn't grasp the basics. Now, they were trying Monopoly.

"If you buy this property, each time that either Maddie or I land on it, we'll have to pay you rent." Sheldon flipped the property card, showing the toddler the list of rent prices. "And If you manage to buy all three of these colors, you'll be allowed to buy houses, and eventually hotels that will increase the rent you'll charge us. Will you buy the property, now?"

Andy furrowed his eyebrows, staring at his handful of money then back up at Sheldon. He still didn't understand what the adult was talking about, and he was getting frustrated about it. "Andy no buy, peas."

"Okay, then that means that it's your turn now, Maddie." He turned to the female toddler who was moving her piece around the board. "Maddie stop doing that, and roll the dice."

Maddie stopped, and looked up at Sheldon with a small frown. "Dis game no fun! Maddie no get it."

"What do you mean, 'you don't get it?'" Sheldon asked, placing the dice on the board and passing it to Maddie. "It's your turn, so return your character to visiting jail, roll the dice, and move your piece."

"But dis game no fun!" Maddie whined, flicking Sheldon's car piece and crossing her arms. "Maddie no want to pay this game no more."

"Andy, too," the blonde boy said, nodding in agreement.

"There is an L in  _play_." Sheldon narrowed his eyes at the two toddlers sitting opposite him. They were, once again, getting on his nerves. How dare they complain when he was already so generous to momentarily pause in building his Lego Death Star just to give them what they wanted! He had until Saturday to complete the Death Star, and he had to attach the final pieces in front of Raj. He was already about ninety percent done with it when the infants started whining about wanting to play with him. So he did! And now they were whining again! It was always like this with these two, they always wanted something from him, and he didn't understand  _why_  they did! They didn't seem to act this way towards Leonard or any of the others! "If you don't want to play this, then what do you want to play? We've tried practically every easy game we have, and I strongly doubt that you'll be able to understand Life or Cluedo. Especially not rock-paper-scissors-lizard-Spock."

"We want pay fun game," Andy explained, pushing the Monopoly board away. "Dis game no fun. Dis game hahd."

Sheldon's eye twitched. "How is it hard? This is one of the easiest games out there! Let's see you call this game hard when I bring out the three-dimensional chess!"

"Fun game," Andy repeated, frowning at him. "Sedon dis no fun game! Sedon no fun." Sheldon face twitched.

"Uncah Wenad fun," Maddie piped in, tapping a finger on her chin. "Uncah Wenad ah-ways fun!"

Andy grinned, turning to her twin to continue discussing the 'fun' Leonard, while forgetting that his not fun self was still in the room. "Uncah Wenad fun, wike Mommy!"

"Uncah Wenad da funest! Mommy da funest, too!"

"Sedon fun?" Andy asked, turning to Maddie, who also had forgotten that he was still in the room. Maddie shook her head, and they barely noticed how his face started to twitch. "Sedon not fun wike Mommy and Uncah Wenad."

Fun? How was he not 'fun?' He was the funnest out of the four of them! It was he who was the one who invented three person chess, and it was  _he_  who was the one who thought of the idea of creating a new set of personalized robots. What wasn't fun about that? And how exactly was Leonard funner than him? If they had asked Leonard to get them ice cream, the experimental physicist wouldn't even be able to eat with them unless the ice cream was non-dairy! Plus, Leonard was a sore loser at games, like during the great Jenga tantrum of 2008 when Leonard kept insisting that he bumped the table to win! Sore losers weren't fun at all. And in what universe was Penny fun? Penny's perception of fun was playing Twister while drunk, dancing along to the likes of country music, or worse,  _online shoe shopping_. He, on the other hand, was the sole definition of fun! If only these tiny humans could take a peak in his brain and get a glimpse of the great debates he has with himself, they'd see how fun he was.

"—Mommy make tain sound too!"

"Uncah Wenad dance funny too!"

"Cos Uncah Wenad fun!"

"Do Sedon dance?"

Sheldon saw Maddie sent him a furtive glance, and he suddenly felt very, very upset. "Sedon no fun, so Sedon no dance."

"Oh. But Uncah Wenad fun and dances! Wike Mommy!"

"Mommy and Uncah Wenad fun, Sedon not."

He was angrier than ever and was filled with despair; even hot apple cider with cinnamon sticks couldn't calm him down. Not only did the twerps seem to ignore his presence, but they were also talking against him! He was fun! So, he didn't dance, but that was not the sole requirement to be fun! The math even suggested that he was a clown made of candy in one universe, but not even one universe had him dancing, but that didn't mean that he wasn't fun! What made him even angrier was that he actually  _cared_  about these infants' opinion. He went on for an entire month ignoring Leonard's complaints about the Jenga match, and barely cared about all of the insults that the grad students from his lecture sent him, yet here he was, outraged just because two toddlers thought he wasn't fun.

What was wrong with him? He was a successful physicist, former child prodigy and future Nobel laureate; he wasn't supposed to be offended by this! What made matters worse that he wasn't just angry, but he suddenly felt an odd sense of melancholy whenever they spoke favorably of Leonard. What was so great about his roommate anyway? He was even better than Leonard, and much more interesting than him. The toddlers should be praising  _him_ , not Leonard. They should be more than grateful that he was even allowing them to spend time with him, as his time was very precious and was meant for greater things than babysitting. So there was no reason for him to be upset! But he wasn't upset, the feeling of melancholy just crept up on him, and now he was sulking. How embarrassing. Maybe he should just forfeit and think of some other way to return the children to their mother. Taking care of them was starting to have a bad effect not only to his REM cycle, but also to his emotional state, and his thinking process.

"Sheldon, I'm back!" The front door opened, and Leonard stepped in, carrying a box of pizza. "Raj and Howard are just finding a spot to park the car, then they'll come right up for Vintage Video Game Night."

"Uncah Wenad!"

"Uncah Wenad!"

The twins got up from their couches and flocked towards the  _great_  Leonard. Note the sarcasm. They seemed ten times happier than they were while they were playing Monopoly. "Uncah Wenad! Peas pay with Andy! Sedon no fun!"

Leonard raised an eyebrow as he set the bag on a vacant spot on the coffee table. "What do you mean Sheldon's no fun?"

"Sedon make Maddie pay game dats no fun!" Maddie complained, and Sheldon mentally noted that he would never give in to her demands again. The nerve of that child. "Uncah Wenad wotsa fun, wike mommy! Peas pay with Maddie, too?"

The experimental physicist blinked, then turned to look at the theoretical physicist who was unconsciously sulking in his spot. Sheldon didn't sulk, or mope, unless he actually cared about what made him upset; i.e. missing Stan Lee and William Shatner at the comic book store, and having to collaborate with Kripke. He also normally did not care about other people's opinions of him, and it somewhat shocked him to know that the twins saying that Sheldon was not fun gravely affected him. It was a huge shocker to see him sulk, and even bigger shocker to know that Sheldon cared about the twins' opinion. "Uh, we'll play later, kids. It's time for dinner." The toddlers sighed in defeat then returned to their couches, while Leonard sat on his armchair and stared at his roommate. "Hey, buddy, are you okay?"

Sheldon's gaze lifted from his lap to the aforementioned man. He had a sudden urge to ignore him, but he wouldn't as he was the bigger man. "Yes, I'm just pondering on what I should add to my grant proposal before submitting it. My mother's god knows what I'll do if Kripke's research is even a word longer than mine."

"Sorry we're late," the door opened again, and Howard and Raj entered the apartment. "Raj couldn't find any free spots, so we had to wait a bit."

"There was one car that seriously stole the spot I was supposed to park at," Raj sneered, taking a seat beside Sheldon. "Nevertheless, I will take all of this negative energy and divert into beating all of you in Mario Party! I haven't played that game in ages!"

"Of course you haven't played it in ages," Howard remarked, grabbing a handful of napkins and a piece of pizza, "it's the reason why we called it Vintage Game Night."

"Is it really considered as a vintage game?" Leonard asked while slicing the twins' share of pizza into tiny bite sized pieces. "I thought that we only played games that are, you know, vintage."

Sheldon watched as the twins happily thanked Leonard for cutting their food. They never thanked him for anything. They didn't even call him  _uncle_! It was just plain Sheldon, and they didn't even call him his proper title of doctor. "It can be considered as semi-vintage as it has nearly been a decade since it came out. Also, most our vintage game selection consists of single player games, it would be better to actually beat all of you, not just by getting a higher score."

"You ain't going to beat me," Raj said, taking a large bite from his pizza, "Yoshi and I will crush all of you!" The astrophysicist dramatically bolted from his spot and pointed at each of them, "you will all witness the wrath of Koothra-Yoshi!"

Howard scowled at his best friend, "who even said you get to call dibs on Yoshi? You should be Peach, since you like her so much."

Raj scoffed, walking towards the Wii and putting the game inside. "Just because I have a preference for Peach, doesn't mean I want to use her character all the time! And besides, I like Daisy, too, but I'm seriously having the Yoshi vibes."

"I still don't understand why you get to be Yoshi," Howard sneered, "I wanted to be Yoshi!"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow, planning to join in the discussion, "actually, none of you get to play Yoshi, as  _I_  want to be Yoshi. But I do recommend Mario or Luigi for both of you."

"But I make a great Yoshi impression!" Howard turned to the twins who were watching him carefully, and Sheldon rolled his eyes. "Yoshi! Yoshi!"

"That's like the only thing he says," Leonard pointed out, standing to get something from the fridge. "Well, I can also do a Mario impression." Howard cleared his throat, then proceeded to imitate the Italian Plumber, placing a finger under his nose to create a mustache. "Hello! It's-a-me-ya, Mario!"

"Uncah Howad funny!" Maddie laughed, clapping along with Andy, causing Howard to grin. He always loved children, and wanted some of his own. Seeing that the twins enjoyed his impressions made him happy. "Hello, children! My name is Mario, have you seen Peach? I think that Bowser took her again!"

Sheldon snorted, what was so fun about impersonating a plumber that these children didn't even know? "Your impressions aren't even close to sounding like Mario. Wario, maybe, or Waluigi, but not Mario."

Raj scowled, "dude why do you have to ruin the fun?" He turned to the twins, who were both sporting a small frown. "Sheldon's no fun, isn't he?"

Andy huffed, shaking his blonde head. "Sedon no fun. Uncah Howad fun!"

"Uncah Waj and Wenad fun too!" Maddie nodded in agreement, happily clapping her hands as she turned to Howard. "Uncah Howad do Ma-yoh peas!" Andy grinned, turning to his twin then back at the funny engineer. "Do Osh-ee too, peas!"

"Mario's back! And so is Yoshi!" Howard's smile widened, and Sheldon angrily clutched the napkin in his hands. There was no point in getting frustrated. So, what if he wasn't fun? He was still better than the three of his friends combined, and that was way better than being considered as 'fun' by toddlers. He had other things to get worked up about, like not seeing William Shatner, or making sure that his grant proposal was better than Kripke's, and finishing his Lego Death Star. Children's opinions did not bother him one bit.

How he wished that these last four days would just fly by as quickly as they could.

* * *

 **Saturday;**  2 days until end of task.

* * *

Leonard was certain that there was something wrong with his roommate.

Sheldon had suddenly diverted his entire attention to finishing his Lego death Star, and when he wasn't doing that, he was typing away on his laptop. He did that in between taking care of the twins, which seemed to be doing pretty well. Sheldon had even managed to get the twins to eat vegetables! In addition to that, his roommate hadn't complained even once, and it shocked him greatly. He had originally envisioned Sheldon breaking down from the very first hour of taking care of the twins, but he was totally mistaken. It had already been four days and aside from the melancholic day that William Shatner visited the comic book store, Sheldon had zero problems with the arrangement.

And that was exactly Leonard's problem.

It was next to impossible for Sheldon to not have  _any_  opinions whatsoever regarding taking care of the twins. Sheldon wasn't even bragging about how great he was at babysitting! Not since the first day of Sheldon taking over. How was it possible that Sheldon would miss an opportunity at gloating? It wasn't! And that confused him to a great extent! The physicist had been unusually silent since Thursday night, and it worried him. Because of Sheldon being a fan of homeostasis, he knew that he did not like change of any kind, so he would understand if the twins' arrival upset him in some way. However, it had been nearly three weeks since the twins came, and he also knew that Sheldon had finally grown accustomed to them. He no longer complained (as much) about them lodging with them, and he didn't bring up cargos to France like he always did. Sheldon even bought the twins their own superhero themed sippy cups after he ruthlessly threw out their bottles a few days before.

What really bothered him, was Sheldon's behavior towards the twins.

Up until Thursday night, Sheldon had been showing signs of being fond of the twins. He bought them sippy cups, their own Flash dolls and he had even took them out for ice cream. He even stopped calling them those horrible nicknames he assigned them, and as brats. Sheldon even went out of his way to eat alongside the twins whenever he could, and even seemed to be a bit less rigid with them. Then Thursday rolled in, and there came a drastic change in the dynamic between Sheldon and the twins. While he had been a bit kinder and more sensitive to the twins, he had suddenly reverted to being distant to them. Whenever the twins tried to talked to him to express their thoughts and share with him the new things they learned, he literally ignored them. And when he did pay attention to them, he gave them a blank stare then quickly disregarded them, which deeply upset the children.

It was as if the past four days hadn't happen, and they were back to when the twins first arrived. He didn't think that Sheldon hated the twins, but it seemed more like something was bothering him. He was acting indifferently towards them, and he didn't even try to hide it. Just yesterday when he was building his Lego Death Star, Maddie came up and offered to help. Sheldon glared at her, and told the toddler to, "mind your own business." This, of course, had saddened the toddler, and made them decide to not interfere with the Lego building anymore. Leonard found it sad that the three returned to square one, and he also found the reason  _why_  Sheldon acted that way to be very confusing.

He knew that it was because of the twins saying that he wasn't fun. And up until now, he was astounded that Sheldon cared about someone else's (other than his own) opinion for once. But Sheldon didn't just care, he was heavily affected by it. All of his actions towards the twins since Thursday was an example of his being upset about their opinion. Had the twins not rubbed the fact that he wasn't fun in his face, Sheldon would be talking to them. Not that he was saying that it was the twins' fault! They didn't know that saying that would hurt Sheldon, and kids say a lot of things! Except they never lie... but that wasn't the point! The point was, that he wanted to show Sheldon that the twins liked him, even if wasn't fun. In truth, the twins loved Sheldon (fun or not) and they were just as troubled with Sheldon distancing himself to them. So, he called the only person he knew who could help.

"So, you're saying that, because of it, Sheldon's gotten all mopey?"

Leonard nodded, if it wasn't true then he wouldn't be worrying right now. "It's not even funny how Sheldon looks so melancholic and upset. He turned into some sort of robot, that only does what he needs to do for the twins, then goes back to what he was originally doing. It's kind of sad."

"But weren't you the ones who called him robotic?" Penny asked, taking a bite of her french bread. "Isn't it normal for Sheldon to be, uh, robotic?"

"No, not really. These past few days, Sheldon seemed to be a lot more lively—didn't you notice it whenever we called you?"

The blonde stared at Leonard, wondering if he was hearing himself right. "Were you even there? Sheldon barely even talked to me, how would I even notice it? And when he does, it's pure insults about my kids and how he wants them gone. Why would I care if he's upset?"

"Because you're friends?" Leonard answered as Penny frowned at him; he was getting frowned at by a lot of people nowadays. Sheldon and Penny, to name a few. "But that's not the point, Penny. I need your advice on it, and I need it quick cause he's going to wake up any minute now."

"Well, you're the one who keeps on changing the subject, Leonard. But go ahead, I'll listen. But this better be not about Sheldon, cause I'm getting sick of him and his attitude."

"It is, but he's not that bad." The blonde groaned from the screen. "Just listen, please? It's not bad as you think."

"Anything concerning Sheldon and the twins is bad, Leonard. But go on."

"You see, because of the twins saying that Sheldon's not fun, he suddenly became like this. And it really worries me, because both you and I know that Sheldon rarely cares about  _anyone's_  opinion, yet he's upset because of it. Plus, he's really been warming up to the twins! He's the one who's giving them a bath, and he always eats together with them." Leonard watched the shock that was evident on Penny's face. However, she didn't need to know that the only reason Sheldon was actually taking care of the twins was because he dared him to do it for a week. That would ruin any progress that might happen today. "He even took them out for ice cream the other day—though, don't mention that, cause that's also the day that he missed William Shatner, and he might take that against you."

Penny blinked at the new information on Sheldon's progress with the twins. She couldn't believe what she was hearing; Sheldon actually caring for her kids? Holy crap on a cracker! "Wait, so you're saying that Sheldon actually cares for my children, and that because of them saying that he isn't fun, he's gotten depressed?"

Leonard thought for a moment; it was something like that. Also, this conversation with Penny was going south of nowhere. "Yup, that's pretty much it. So what do you suggest?"

"With how he acts around my kids, he deserves to get insulted. If that isn't what you wanted to hear, just talk to him, that's all I can say." Penny raised her arm slightly, then frantically looked around. "Oh crap, I'm late for my next scene!" Leonard watched the screen as Penny bolted up from her seat in what appeared to be a cafe, and started collecting her things. "I'll talk to you later, Leonard! And don't forget, just talk to Sheldon!"

"Penny, wait—" and the call was disconnected. That conversation really didn't help at all. Why did he even think of asking advice from Penny, in the first place? That conversation would probably enter his hall of fame of ideas that were stupid. Penny really didn't help at all.

"Leonard, good morning." He turned towards the hall where Sheldon stood eyeing him carefully. Had Sheldon heard his entire conversation with Penny? "How was your sleep?"

"Uh, it was okay," Leonard slowly closed his laptop and pushed it away from him. "And how was your sleep?" Sheldon raised an eyebrow as he made his way to the kitchen, "satisfactory, as always. Will you please move, as I will be watching Dr. Who?"

"Sure," the experimental physicist got up, and moved to the beige armchair. "Are you excited for our robot fight, later?"

Sheldon placed a bowl on the counter, and grinned at him. It was the first time he'd seen his roommate actually smile since the events of Thursday. "Why yes! My Sheldroid will surely beat all of your puny robots, and I will be declared as the first victor of Robot Wars. The entire park will stare at awe in my wonderful robot." Then Sheldon, paused, and started to tense, his smile literally dropping from his face. "Are we required to bring the children?"

Leonard nodded, and he saw Sheldon wince. "Of course, if we don't, you'll have to stay here with them." There was a soft grumble, and Leonard wished that he had Vulcan hearing like Sheldon. "Very well, I guess there's nothing I can do about it." Sheldon made his way to his spot, and turned to him, "but make sure that you get those children out of my way."

Today was going to be a long day.

* * *

"Punch him Wolobot!" Howard yelled, furiously smashing buttons on his controller. "Punch him down to the ground!" The brown human shaped robot wheeled in towards a similar shaped, purple colored robot, and swung it's arm right at the top. "Hell yeah! Defeat that stupid girly thing!"

Raj scoffed, flicking a hidden switch that was on the bottom of his controller. "No, Roboppali, stand up! Fight! Don't let that bully take you down! If you win I'll give you a color change, fuchsia maybe!" The purple robot slowly bent upwards, and started wheeling towards the brown robot.

"Oh no," Howard muttered, forcing his robot to dodge the shove that Raj's robot was about to give him. "Wolobot, I swear if you lose I will turn you into my mother's blood pressure monitor!"

Leonard adjusted his glasses as he watched the best friends fighting with their robots. "Gee, the trash talk in this competition is amazing." Sheldon nodded from his spot on the picnic table, gently attaching another block to the Lego Death Star. "Yes, as the saying goes, their mothers are so bad at robot wars, their mothers aren't even allowed to join anymore." The theoretical physicist chuckled breathily, and Leonard simply shook his head. "I can't believe you actually brought your Death Star with you. Aren't you going to join the Robot Wars? Your Sheldroid looks pretty intimidating. Maybe even as intimidating as my Hoftaborg."

Sheldon glared at his smirking roommate, checking the manual then attaching another block to his Death Star. "Your trash talk is getting rusty, Leonard. And yes, I will be joining as my Sheldroid has been preparing for this very day that he beats all of you. I simply brought my Death Star along as the rules in Raj's challenge states that I must finish it in his presence." He gestured towards Raj who was screaming at Howard, "I am in his presence, and so I may finish it now."

Leonard shrugged, and took a seat across Sheldon, the Lego Death Star blocking his roommate's face. "Why is there even a rule like that?"

"Something about me cheating," Sheldon peeked from the side of the Death Star, scowling at his roommate. "Which is confusing as, how would I even cheat? Do I possess some sort of otherworldly powers that somehow constructs Lego models? Or a machine that does the same thing?"

"Is it possible to buy a pre-built Lego Death Star?"

"Well yes, but what's the fun in that?" Sheldon attached the final block and grinned, leaning back to marvel at his finished Lego model. He could already smell the sweet scent of victory, and his signed, fiberglass made Silversurfer surfboard. Once he has collected his prize, he would probably take this with him on his next visit to Texas, and give it to his Meemaw. Meemaw would love to see this. "Look at it, Leonard. Isn't it marvelous?"

Leonard smiled in agreement, standing up and examining the Lego made ship. "I gotta admit, it looks pretty awesome. How long did it take Raj to finish his?" Sheldon crossed his arms, still smirking at his masterpiece. "Nine days, thirteen hours."

"How long did it take for you to finish yours?"

"Six days, fifteen hours." Sheldon was filled with pride, he was going to put his new signed surfboard above the bookshelf behind the couch. It would be nice to be above his desk or his bed, but it might fall and kill him. He wasn't going to take that risk. "Can you already imagine how cool the surfboard will look in our living room? Our collection only gets better and better." He slowly rotated the Death Star, then turned to where Howard and Raj were arguing. "Did the trash talk get too personal? Like saying that Mrs. Wolowitz doesn't sit on a bench while watching Robot Wars, she sits  _around_  the bench?"

"No, nothing like that," Leonard flinched as Howard angrily threw the controller on the ground, and picked the dented brown robot before marching towards them. "Did you see that? Raj cheated! He intentionally made his stupid Koothrash to roll over my foot just so he could beat me!"

Raj joined them, smugly grinning as his purple robot wheeled around the picnic table. "I didn't cheat, Howard's just a sore loser. My beautiful Roboppali lost control and bumped him before turning Wolobot to the ground!" He astrophysicist punched the air and Howard growled at him. "You are a giant cheater Raj, and you know it." The engineer hissed as he placed his robot beside Sheldon's Death Star, eyeing the dent near the side where the brown paint was chipped off. "By the way, where are the twins?"

Leonard pointed to the clear patch of grass, where Andy and Maddie were busy playing with a multicolored ball. "Twins! Hey, come over here!" The two blonde toddlers, paused at rolling the ball, and turned to the experimental physicist and grinned. Maddie picked the ball up, before running towards the picnic table where the adults sat. "Uncah Wenad! We pay with obot, too?" Andy asked once they reached the picnic table. "Obot wook fun!"

"You can't play with them, yet." Raj said, placing his robot on top of the bench. "Only adults like us can play with the robots."

"Cheating adults," Howard sneered, glaring at the purple robot at the opposite side of the table. Raj turned to his best friend, his hands on his hips and his lips still in it's previous smirk. "Oh come on, Howard, just let it go. You lost, deal with it, and I get your Marvel Civil War collection. Stop being a sore loser."

Sheldon raised an eyebrow as he set his Sheldroid on the grass, "Raj, which reminds me, I finished my Death Star under six days and and fifteen hours. I'd like to get the surfboard on our way back home." Raj paled, staring at Sheldon with wide eyes. "You finished it? Under six days? You must have cheated, dude!" He started flailing his arms around, and Howard found himself smirking. "Wasn't it you who said to deal with it? Stop being a sore loser, Raj, flailing your arms like that makes you look like Magikarp."

"Leonard, is your worthless robot ready to fight my obviously superior Sheldroid?" Sheldon grabbed his controller, making the red robot move to where Raj and Howard had been previously standing. A green colored robot then wheeled towards Sheldon's, and he turned to see Leonard fumbling with his controller as he made his way to the clearing. "Your robot isn't the only one to be superior."

Sheldon was about to do a round of trash talking Leonard when he felt something tugging at his shirt. He looked down and found the twins staring at him with wonder. "What do you two want, now?"

Andy blinked up at him, a wide smile forming on his face. "Pay with obot, too, peas?" Of course! They only liked him when they could get something from him. When it was about something they wanted, they always went to him, but when they knew they couldn't get what they wanted, they'd go to the others. How annoying. There was still two days before he could finally detach himself from these infuriating children. He had a theory that they only reason they were here was to annoy him to a great extent, and they were doing a great job at it. That would explain why they always tried to talk to him. "No, you may not. These are for adults, not for twaddling children. Now, go elsewhere and stop bothering me."

With a small cluck of his tongue, he left the frowning toddlers and continued his way to stand in front of Leonard, who was sporting a frown of his own. "Sheldon, what was that all about? You could have been a bit nicer. They're kids."

"Why must I be nice when they're the ones intruding my personal space?" The physicist uninterestedly said, pressing a button to make his robot move. The red robot wheeled towards the green one, and bumped it roughly. "I find it annoying how you and Penny continuously badger me on how I treat the children who I have no obligations of dealing with. Why must I be the one to adjust to them living with us, when they should be the one to be mindful of me?" Sheldon snarled, making his robot smash itself against Leonard's. "Why am I always seen as the one in the wrong when I have done nothing wrong? I never asked for these children to live with us! And why must I always be criticized for not behaving favorably towards them? I only met those children three weeks ago! There's no way I'd possibly be more than acquaintances with them. I may be accustomed to them being here, but that does not mean that I  _like_  them being here, Leonard." He flicked a switch on the controller and made his robot ram itself on the green robot, causing it to topple over. "And it does not mean that I will suddenly like children."

Leonard gawked as his Hofstaborg tipped over to it's side, a dent the size of a volleyball etched at the front. He wasn't sure if his eyes was seeing right, but he could see light smoke coming from the motor of his robot. He was also shocked at Sheldon's sudden outburst. "Did you eavesdrop on my conversation with Penny?"

The green robot made a wiggling movement, then it landed back on it's wheels. Before it could move, however, the red robot was back, and smashed into it. "I do not eavesdrop. I just so happened to come out right when you were talking to her." Sheldon pushed a red button that made the Sheldroid's metal sides to lift, revealing a set of robot arms that extended and slammed straight into the Hofstaborg's robot face. "I truly fail to understand why all of you are mad whenever I try to reprimand the twins. I'm not doing it for me, I'm doing it for them. Partially."

"Are you seriously that upset about the twins saying that you're not fun?" Leonard asked as the Sheldroid came in for another body slam; it wasn't looking good for the Hofstaborg. "I know the twins can be a bit... insensitive and straightforward," Leonard looked up, glancing at the tight frown on Sheldon's face as the Hofstaborg started to fight back. He wasn't lying about the twins coming off as insensitive and straightforward—much like someone he knew all too well—but it rarely did surface. The twins' pros outweighed their cons. "And I know that they seem as if they don't like you as much as they like us, but in reality they do like you. They're just not that familiar with you yet." He flinched when the Sheldroid jabbed his robot again, but quickly snapped out of it and took advantage of the red robot's arm getting stuck in the Hoftaborg's design. Once he successfully made the red robot trip, he glanced at the twins who were playing ball with the other two. "When they first learned how to draw, they drew Penny a picture of a bowl of noodles with giant glasses. That was supposed to be me, but I didn't mind it, cause they're just kids. They don't really mean what they said."

"Kids who can't seem to appreciate my generosity." Sheldon sneered, forcing his robot to get up and slam into Leonard's again. "Have you noticed how they don't call me uncle? Not that I want them to, I just find it insulting how they all call you that as a sign of respect and can't even call me doctor. They never even thank me for anything! I went out of my way to waste my time by talking to them—when, clearly, I could be doing something far more important—and even brought them out to get ice cream. Did I get a thank you? I did not, thank you very much. What I did get was them saying that I was 'no fun' and that they preferred all of you, instead of me." The Sheldroid wheeled back, effectively dodging the Hoftsaborg's jabs, then spun around, and slammed into the green robot's side.

"The reason why they don't call you uncle is because..." Leonard furrowed his eyebrows, moving his lips to the side as he thought of what he was about to say. There was a good reason to why that was, but he was sure that Sheldon wasn't ready to know it yet. Not when he was all upset and melancholic. The truth was meant for a later date, when everything (and everyone) would be ready for it. But any explanation he could think of would somehow lead to a path where Sheldon would ask about the father. "They've known us way before the day the first arrived. You know that we've been hanging out with Penny since last year, and we even invited you. Several times, and you never agreed to come with us."

Leonard looked up and saw a dark, unreadable expression on Sheldon's face. Uh oh. "Why would I even agree to meet with the person I despised the most?" There was a certain kind of vehemence in his roommate's tone, but he wasn't sure if it was of anger or of something else. "And I just realized that, none of you ever told me that Penny had children. Why is that?"

Uh oh. "Well, if you just came with us then you would have known. Howard, Bernadette, Raj, Penny and I, we all hung out. The twins were there, too, and we always asked you to go, and you always said no. By your tenth no, we decided to no longer invite you, since we figured that you'd keep on rejecting our offer. That's why the twins all call us uncle, cause we're their uncles."

Sheldon snorted, returning his focus back into the game as the Hoftsaborg pushed against his red robot. "Not surprising. They do seem to prefer all of you over me."

"Sheldon, listen," Leonard sighed, both in exasperation at trying to convince Sheldon that the twins  _did_  like him, and in acknowledging that his robot was about to get destroyed. "The twins really do like you, and I know that you know that, cause they're always trying to impress you and talk to you. Just because they find you not fun, doesn't mean that they don't like you. You've only known each other for three weeks, you still have time to change their minds. It takes time and a lot of effort to fully get to know someone, and that also applies to you and the twins." There was one last clash of metal, then the green robot fell to the ground. He was going to have to spend hours of fixing that. "How long did it take for you to consider me as a friend?"

The theoretical physicist pursed his lips, thinking about the answer to his roommate's question. "Give or take one year."

"See? A year—wait? A year?" Leonard repeated, and Sheldon nodded. "What do you mean a year? We're roommates and we see each other everyday, how could you have not considered me as a friend before a year?"

"Like you said," Sheldon turned his controller off, walking towards his robot. "It takes a lot of time and effort to fully know someone. Although, we lived together, it took up to a year before I finally memorized your idiosyncrasies. And when I did, I then mentally declared you as my friend. About another year later, I decided you to be my best friend. Don't you feel honored?"

Leonard crossed his arms, still surprised at the revelation. "Geez, I thought that you'd say a month or something." Sheldon shrugged, lifting his red robot and inspecting the dents it had. "But enough of that. See? It took a while for you to even consider me as a friend; naturally, it will take a while for the twins to fully know you. You know some facts about them, but mainly because of what Penny wrote. They don't know anything about you, other than you're not fun. But it's only been three weeks since they've lodged with us, and four days since you actually started to get to know them. And be a bit nicer, cause kids, especially toddlers, wouldn't hve a clue to why you're so hard on them. Who knows, maybe after a week or so, they'll get to know you more, and you'll get to prove to them that you're fun. Maybe, even funner than me."

Sheldon stayed still for a moment, before sending his roommate an amused smile. Though, he found Leonard's speech to be a bit irrelevant, he did pick up something of it. It was foolish of him to be stricken by them saying that he wasn't fun. They didn't know him yet, and they had no basis other than them no comprehending the most basic of games. He wasn't going to let Howard, Raj or Leonard to outdo him! Not only was he going to prove that he was the funnest of the four of them, but he was going to show his friends that he was the better of all of them. By the time the twins leave 4A, they were going to be smarter, wiser, and most all, consider him as the greatest person on earth. "Leonard, I must say, though I find your classic pep talks to be a bit redundant, they do change the atmosphere of an intense battle. And though it heavily pains me to admit it, but you're somewhat right. They don't fully know me yet, and thus they have basis for their claims. Therefore, I shall give some of my time to show them that I  _am_  fun. And greater than all three of you combined."

Leonard imitated his smile, picking the trashed robot from the ground. "That's the spirit, Sheldon. Show them how it's done."

"Oh, I will, and it will surprise all of you. We all know that I am Homo Novus and that—" Sheldon's cheerful demeanor dropped as he turned to where the picnic table was, and he felt time slow down. There, south of the table was a multicolored ball flying in mid air, slowly descending towards his just finished Lego Death Star. In an instant, the ball collided with the left side of the Death Star and suddenly, hundreds of Lego pieces went flying towards various directions. Had the circumstances been different, Sheldon would have found it mildly funny how time seemed to slow down at that very moment. But it was not funny, at all. And as he ran to towards the picnic table, screaming, he also noticed how two blue eyed children were seemingly guilty of the act. Were they the reason why his masterpiece was destroyed?

"What in the world happened?!" Sheldon bellowed, his eyes darting at Howard then at Raj, and then at the two toddlers standing behind the two adults.

Raj fidgeted, nervously glancing at the twins, then at Howard. "Uh, it was an accident... We were playing ball, then And-Howard hit the ball too hard and it flew here." Howard shot Raj a look, then sighed, turning towards Sheldon who did not look happy. But then again, seeing something you worked on for six days straight get destroyed like a building getting demolished via wrecking ball was not a sight anyone would be ecstatic to see. Unless, of course, that 'anyone' owed someone a limited edition signed collectible for finishing it under six days. "Yeah, sorry Sheldon, I didn't mean to destroy it."

Sheldon stared at Howard in disbelief; how could he be so calm about this? Didn't he understand the value of what he had just destroyed? "You didn't mean to? Do you even know what you've done? You've ruined it! And I was planning on sending it to my Memmaw, too!"

Leonard jogged towards them, worried for his roommate who had seemingly blew a fuse. "Sheldon, calm down. We'll just help in on fixing it."

"None of you understand the gravity of this entire situation!" Sheldon hissed, waving his arms around and gesturing to the broken Death Star then to himself. "None of you know how it feels to see something you worked so hard on get destroyed because of something so avoidable that even a bird could dodge it!" He placed a hand over his forehead, pinching his temples lightly to try and calm him down. "This is the North Pole all over again!"

"Oh dear god, he's lost it." Howard muttered as Sheldon stomped around the picnic table, getting even angrier with every second that passed. "He has finally lost it."

Andy watched the fuming adult hiss at the other three adults in silence, cowering behind Howard's legs in fear. It was his fault that the ball had flew so high that Raj couldn't catch it anymore, and he wanted to say sorry, but he was too afraid of Sheldon to apologize. Maddie turned to him, an unsure look on her face. "Andy, say soh-ee to Sedon. Andy did dis, so say soh-ee."

"But Sedon scawy," Andy whispered, flinching as Sheldon started yelling at Howard. "Sedon get mad at Andy."

"But Sedon get mad at Uncah Howad, so Andy say soh-ee." Maddie gave her twin a small shove, and Andy sighed. He didn't want Sheldon to get at Howard when he was the one who destroyed the Death Star. He took one last worried glance at his twin, who was pointing at the adults, and mustered up all the confidence he had to march up to Sheldon.

"—the problem is that none of you ever understand that it affects me greatly!"

"Sheldon, stop yelling, the twins are just there."

"Look, I'll fix it for you, I promise. I'll do it in one day, and you'll still get the surfboard."

"I'll still get the surfboard, dude. Calm down! You won, right?"

"See? This is the problem. Do all of you really gain satisfaction from my misery?" Sheldon snarled picking up the fallen Legos on the table and dumping them inside the container they were originally in. He wasn't going to say it out loud, but completing something on his own gave him a great deal of satisfaction. He absolutely  _did not_  want them to help in any way, because that would mean that he wouldn't get to take all the credit. It was frustrating to even think that he was to rebuild everything all over again. "Six days... all gone." With a small sigh, he plopped down on the bench and felt a hand on his lap. He stared at the tiny hand, and followed it to see that it was Andy.

"What?" Sheldon tried not to sound too harsh, like Leonard said, and turned his body to face the toddler. He studied the male toddler's face, based on his recent observations on facial expressions, he looked nervous, and guilty as well. Eyebrows furrowed, baby teeth lightly clenched, and tiny feet shuffling on the grass. Andy frowned, then looked up at him, and it reminded him of Penny when she had stained his cushion, and after the Chancellor's Award—the one event he no longer wanted to remember. "Is there something you want?"

"Andy," the toddler pointed to himself, "ih-eeeh-is," he excitedly turned to Maddie who was nodding, "soh-eee—so-soh-soh-wee." Sheldon raised an eyebrow, half shocked that the kid tried to pronounce it properly, and half shocked that he was right that the toddler seemed guilty. "Andy ee- _is_  soh-wee dat Andy bah-woke da det stah! Andy beh-wee soh-wee." Then Andy clapped his hands together, dropped to the ground and... groveled. "Peas foh-gev Andy!"

Sheldon stared at the toddler with wide eyes, his previous anger disappearing and replaced with bewilderment. He really wanted to get angry at the toddler for yet again, ruining his day, but he found it hard to do so. Instead, he felt some odd sympathy for the kid, and sighed. It really confused him how these children could so easily affect him, they were complete strangers yet he felt a weird connection with them that he could not explain. Was this what his sister meant by 'everyone loves babies?' But Bernadette did not like children... well, she seemed to like the twins. Maybe, it was just these twin specifically who were likable. Or, maybe they were starting to change his opinion on childre—no, it must have been the former. Him liking the idea of children was next to slightly improbable, and only changed whenever his mother demanded that he give her grandchildren. Which meant that... (he winced at the thought) he was starting to like... the twins. Drat.

"Stand up," he calmly said, placing his hands on both sides of the toddler and lifting him to his feet. "You've been forgiven. Now, go along and play."

Andy blinked, wiping away a few tears that had formed with his sleeve. "Sedon foh-give Andy?" Sheldon nodded, grabbing his wet wipes from his bag and wiping the toddler's dirt stained hands. "Yes, I forgive you. Don't make me repeat myself."

"But Sedon sad!" Maddie exclaimed, running towards them. "Sedon want Maddie sing sof' kitty?"

_Soft kitty?_

"Why do you know soft kitty...?" He thought for a moment, then came into conclusion that Penny must have thought the song to her children. How unoriginal, but he would let it pass. Soft Kitty was a great song that always made him feel better, and he wouldn't deny these children of something so great. As long as they only used it for it's proper use. "Soft kitty is only for when you're sick, I'm not sick." He told them, and the twins nodded in response. "I am well, so please, do go on with whatever you were doing prior to this."

"Sedon okay?" Andy asked, just to make sure.

"I'm okay." Sheldon sent them both a small smile before they happily scurried off to the clearing. Well that was over and done with.

"Where do you think Andy learned how to do that?" He heard Leonard asked from the opposite side of the table.

"Hmm, it might have been when I turned the channel to Lifetime. There was a movie playing there that I really wanted to see." Raj answered in thought. "I do recall a scene in the movie where the girl begged on her knees for the guy to forgive her when she thought he was cheating on her. The twins might have seen that."

"Hey, who cares? Sheldon seems okay," Howard remarked, relieved that he wouldn't be blamed anymore. "Just get him the surfboard, and we'll all be okay."

"Actually," Sheldon interrupted, standing up and walking over towards them. "I am okay with the children, not with the two of you who seemed to have thought that playing catch next to my Death Star was a good idea." He sent Howard and Raj a dark look, frightening both the engineer and the astrophysicist in the process. "We're going to have a serious discussion on how the two of you are going to handle this tragic situation."

Leonard chuckled as Sheldon started barking out orders for the two to pick up and clean each and every Lego piece that fell onto the grass. Seeing how Sheldon easily forgave the twins gave him a huge sense of relief. He was worried for nothing, and he hoped that Sheldon would start warming up to the twins. The twins did love Sheldon, and he could sense that his roommate was already starting to like them, too.

* * *

Sheldon stepped back as he and Leonard admired the shiny, silver, signed, limited edition Silversurfer surfboard that securely hung above the bookshelf behind their couch.

His hard work  _definitely_  paid off.

"I gotta admit, Sheldon, you were right about it looking cool." Leonard remarked, grinning at the new addition to their collection. "Actually, it's more than cool—it's awesome!" He saw his roommate nod in agreement before returning to his spot, "like I told you before, the fruit of one's labor is so much sweeter than just buying it off eBay."

"So, what's going to happen with your Broken Death Star?" Leonard asked as he took a seat on the armchair, grabbing the remote to turn the tv on. "Are you going to finish it again?" He started flipping channels, then chose one by random. It was playing one of those gossip channels that Raj loved to watch.

"I might, but not now," Sheldon answered, frowning at Leonard's choice of channel. "Raj said that he would finish the Death Star for me, and that'll be the one I'll bring back to my Meemaw. Why are we watching this show?" The experimental physicist raised the volume, glancing at Sheldon then back at the tv. "It's that gossip show that Raj always talks about. They might have something on Penny."

Sheldon rolled his eyes, he would never understand Leonard's obsession with the blonde. "You talk to her twice a day. I believe you'll get more information by asking her personally than from an inane show that knows nothing else than making money via exploiting other people's welfare and daily activities." The host said something about another celebrity rumored to get married that month, then several people started to pitch in on their opinions. What a waste of time. "How do you even know what this show is about?"

"I shared an office with Koothrappali," Leonard nodded in understanding, and Sheldon continued. "There was hardly a day where he didn't babble about irrelevant rumors about people I don't even know. Who cares if the so called 'brangelina' had more children? I'd more interested if they had discovered a new element, but no, all Raj talks about is who is supposedly dating who. I'm glad to finally have gotten my own office." Leonard waved his hand dismissively, then pointed to the tv. "It's Penny! It's Penny, shut up!"

The tv showed Penny walking down a street, nearly getting swarmed by people with cameras. She stopped when a passerby started talking to her, and the show's reporter started talking. "Penny! Hey, how are you liking Paris?" Once Penny took a picture with one of the people, she went on to sign autographs. "It's great! I'm really loving the food, and Paris is such a beautiful city. It's impossible not to love being here." The blonde smiled for the camera, then continued signing more autographs. "How are your twins doing? My camera loves and misses your kids!" Penny laughed lightly, moving on to take more pictures with her fans. "The twins are doing great. Tell your camera that the twins loves and misses it, too!" A male fan suddenly dropped to his knees holding up a rose to the blonde.

"Penny, will you marry me?" The fan asked with a heavy French accent. Penny smiled warmly at the fan, taking the rose and placing it in a pocket at the front of her coat before patting his cheek lightly as he stood up. "My first proposal caught on camera! Neat!" There was laughter, followed by Penny taking a picture with the fan then hugging him. "I wish I could say yes, but you'd have to go through my kids first." She then continued walking, and the paparazzi followed after her. "Penny! Penny! One last question, is is true that you're secretly dating your co-star?" Penny laughed, again, "that's a secret!" Without anything else said, she walked into a closed off part of the street, where the camera zoomed in and showed the supposed other actors of the film Penny was working on.

"That must have been this morning," Leonard commented as the camera panned to show another part of the set. "That was what she was wearing when I called her."

"That Penny really is busy, huh?" One of the hosts said to the other people in the room. "Just last month she was shooting her show, now she's shooting a movie! She's nominated for an Emmy, too, right?" A man with dreadlocks was focused on, nodding, "yeah, that girl is really on fire. No wonder she's been dubbed 'the Penny that changed Hollywood.' Based on the online polls, she's even going head to head with Mila Kunis and Scarlett Johansson. Which is pretty impressive, cause she's only been in the business for a year now."

The main host was focused on again, checking a clipboard. "That is impressive. Did she have a sex tape or something? Her rise to fame was pretty quick, plus I'm looking at her feedback, and it's pretty positive. Did she donate millions of dollars to a third world country?" A woman was focused on, frowning at the main host. "Not everyone who gets famous has had a sex tape, Harvey. People just found her really interesting, and no, she didn't donate anything big, yet. I don't think there's anything negative about her, so far." A gruff looking man was focused on, reading a piece of paper. "I think she's pretty hot. The only thing that blocks that, is the fact that she already has two kids." The tv showed a picture of Penny walking down a street, with the twins happily skipping beside her. "Two kids is a lot of baggage for one man, you know. But other than those kids—who is gaining a lot of popularity with the magazines—I think she's the hottest actress out there right now."

"Does anyone know who those twins' dad is?" Another man piped in, causing one of the women to throw a crumpled piece of paper at him. "What? I'm just curious, cause no one ever mentioned anything about him!"

The woman snarled at the man, "Penny had said before that the kids' dad was a very private person who isn't part of the industry. And what the heck is up with guys asking that question? There ain't nothing wrong with being a single mother, ya hear? Plus, with kids that cute, I don't really care." The man held up his hands in defense, and the main host was shaking his head. "I never understand how fights start in this office. So, I heard that there was some new gossip on George Clooney?"

Leonard changed the channel, somewhat insulted because of the show. "What's so wrong about having kids? How exactly is that a negative thing?"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow at him, confused on what his roommate was so mad about. "Well, some men seem to be put off by the idea of dating a woman who already has children. Like Penny. I haven't seen a study about that—and no plans of doing so—therefore, the only basis I have for my statement is what that man said. Nevertheless, I also find it intriguing how one having children is considered as a setback. What I don't understand is how they can't seem to find a single fault in Penny. If they'd like, I can give them a few."

"You're not going to do that, Sheldon," Leonard growled, sending his roommate a look of disapproval. "But really, I think there's nothing bad about single mothers!"

"Your reaction towards this is somehow puzzling. Maybe your mother has already written something about that?"

"I doubt that my mother would." Leonard grabbed his mother's latest book from the end table and tossed it to Sheldon. "She doesn't really write anything optimistic, and writes more of why humans are horrible. In the dust jacket, she even mentions how living life as a normal commoner is worse than getting electrocuted while taking a shower." Sheldon opened the book, then nodded once he confirmed his roommate's statement. "Yes, well all I can say is that there really isn't anything good stemming from those kinds of shows. Koothrappali's research must have came to a dead end because he was too busy catching up on whatever a Kardashian is, instead of looking through a telescope. Surely, now you will have learned your lesson?"

"I just got insulted cause Penny is my friend," the experimental physicist defended. How dense could Sheldon be? "They basically said that Penny isn't desirable just because she has kids. Everything else is a better reason than that!"

Sheldon mentally snickered; how pathetic could Leonard get? So, he was right that Leonard still had some kind of romantic feelings for the blonde. Therefore his hunch was right, and that meant that his plan to foil Leonard's plans was still in motion. In all honesty, he had thought different, that Leonard had finally given up on Penny, due to his recent actions of barely talking about her. But there, right before his very eyes was proof that Leonard really was only babysitting the twins to get back together with Penny! Point for Cooper. "I highly doubt that you'd be less insulted if they said that Penny's negative attributes were speaking with her mouth full, or being a moocher. Enough of that, though, I am interested in knowing who that father is."

"The father...?" Leonard repeated, eyes widening. "The twins' father?"

"Please do not make me repeat myself, Leonard," Sheldon said, placing his hands on his knees and leaning forward. "The show mentioned that the twins' father was a very private man and was not a celebrity. If I am to continue allowing Penny's children to lodge here, I should at least know who their father is. Do you, perhaps, know who he is?" Sheldon studied Leonard's face carefully; he wanted to know of the bespectacled man was lying or not. He had a hunch that it was Leonard, but the children were nothing like his insufferable, moody roommate. Not through features, or mannerisms, or idiosyncrasies. He could recognize the traits they had inherited from Penny, but there were some that seemed familiar, but he wasn't sure of. And, why would Leonard (if not to get back together with Penny) volunteer to babysit the children for Penny, if not because he was their father? None of it was making sense, and he wanted to know, given the window of opportunity.

"Uh, their dad is... uh... he's... well, he's kind of," Leonard stammered, blinking constantly and avoiding eye contact. Interesting. "He's.. well, how do I put this? Uh... "

"Are you their father?" Sheldon bluntly asked, causing Leonard to pause, then laugh loudly. There was still a chance that this was all a gimmick, so he wasn't going to trust Leonard's reaction. "Of course not! They look  _nothing_  like me, and if they were my kids, why would they call me uncle?" He was still not trusting Leonard's reaction, as he was a well experienced liar. Leonard could lie about his entire life story in front of an entire crowd full of psychologists and get away with it. "I can see that you don't believe me, Sheldon. Fine. I have really dark brown eyes. The twins have  _blue_  eyes; clear or sky blue to be specific. Based on what I know, if they were my kids, there was a bigger chance that they'd get my eyes instead of Penny's. The clincher is, that Penny has  _green_  eyes, therefore, if they were our children, their eyes wouldn't be blue, it would either be green or brown."

Leonard proudly smiled and Sheldon scoffed, causing the smile to drop. Silly Leonard and his lies. "Your statement does not fully prove anything, Leonard. You do know that there are a good percentage of people who started out with blue eyes that gradually changed through the years? Therefore, there is still a big chance that, if they really are your offsprings, their eye color will still change to either brown, or green." Sheldon crossed his arms, leaning back into his spot as he took his turn in smiling smugly. "And, do not forget, if Penny's parents, or yours—once again, if they really are your offsprings—had blue eyes, that is another story. You cannot prove your claim on appearances alone, Leonard."

"You're improbable, you know that?" Leonard growled, shaking his head in disbelief that his roommate was even considered as sane. "And I'm telling you, I'm really not their father."

Sheldon smirked at him, snatching the remote and changing the channel to National Geographic. "Yes, continue on denying it, but we'll know soon enough, Leonard." He mentally chuckled, he was a step closer at foiling Leonard's plans. Muhaha, indeed.

* * *

 **Sunday;**  1 day until end of task.

* * *

"You're not gonna join us? Really?" Leonard asked as he strapped on his vest.

Sheldon shook his head from his spot, barely looking at his roommate as he typed. "I'm afraid not. I've just received Kripke's research, and I'm filled with excitement over pointing out all the wrongs." He lifted his laptop slightly, causing Leonard to lean over the couch to see. "I underlined all of the mistakes, and even plan on making it color coded. Green for stupid mistake, but I can look it over; blue for stupid mistake that has to be fixed soon, and red for, how stupid can you get? Fix it, right this instant."

"Wow, you even made a key at the bottom," Leonard remarked, squinting his eyes to recognize the tiny font at the very end. "And there's even correctional foot notes. You know, if you were just a bit less insouciant for strangers, you'd make a great teacher."

"Leonard, please do not insult me at such an early time." Sheldon said as Leonard returned to fixing his paintball gear. "Our agreed start time for insults is at nine. It's seven, and I am still in my pajamas, therefore not insults, yet."

"Sarcasm?" The experimental physicist asked as he brought out his paintball gun from the closet. "Sarcasm is allowed. Now, will you please go on your way and stop bothering me?" He heard his roommate sigh while closing the closet door, "yeah, yeah, I'm going. So, you're going to be okay with the twins?" Sheldon turned his head towards his roommate and raised an eyebrow. "Leonard, I've been taking care of the twins for nearly a week now. How will today be different from any of the other days I've spent babysitting?"

Leonard stared at Sheldon; had he forgotten about what happened last Thursday? If he did, then great! But if he didn't, and remembering the fact that Andy broke his Death Star, then he'd come home to find a receipt from FedEx or something. "You're not mad anymore? At the twins?"

"Why would I be mad?" Sheldon calmly asked and Leonard let it go. He grabbed his duffel bag, and opened the front door. "Alright, then, I'm gonna go now. You sure you don't want to come with us?"

"One, I will not go. Second, if I go then where would we leave the twins at?" They stared at each other; Leonard realizing that Sheldon was right, and Sheldon dumbstruck at how the tiny physicist had forgotten about that important factor. There was another beat of silence before Leonard sighed and left without another word. Silly Leonard forgetting about something so important. Had he remembered that, maybe he would appreciate his effort of asking if he wanted to join them. This would be reflected in the next roommate analysis, on a much more positive note than the last one. Had Leonard not underestimated him, he might have aced his analysis, but due to the aforementioned incident, he would get a b.

Although, unbeknownst to Leonard, he still did have some issues with the infants. Their comments from Thursday still bothered him, and it was annoying. He did forgive Andy for destroying his Lego masterpiece, but really could not bring himself to hate him for it. Not even a little. It was only the 'not fun" comment that made him feel uneasy whenever he was around the children. He would be lying if he said that he wasn't getting even a  _little_  bit attached to the twins. He found the apartment oddly quiet whenever they were sleeping, and though he was annoyed when they bothered him, he was no longer as annoyed as he used to be. Frustrating as it was, he could do nothing as his mind had decided that he had... changed his opinion about the twins. Leonard would kill to hear him say that, as to why he kept to himself.

However, if he really did not care about the twins as  _some_  people are saying, then he would have not been disturbed by their comment. Look at him, a successful physicist, admitting that he was wrong about something. If he could go back in time (he really needed to invent the time machine) and change something, he would force himself to ignore Leonard's outburst, and refrain from ever agreeing to taking care of the twins. He had a theory that if he never took care of them, he would not feel any connection to them, even if they did still lodge with them. Because if he did agree to babysit, he wouldn't have spent time with them, and had gotten to know them. If he was to give them a specific label of what he thought of them via relationship, they would most likely be considered as his... friends. How utterly disappointing! He was eating his words!

"Sedon?" Sheldon was broken out of his confusing thoughts by Andy's tired voice. He looked around the living room, then settled his eyes to the hallways where the toddler was standing. "Hello. It seems you're awake," the toddler nodded, rubbing a hand against his eye, "what do you want?"

Andy yawned, then shuffled his feet. "Tv, peas?"

"Oh, right, the mentally insane cartoons that practically teach you nothing." He grabbed the remote and switched it to Nickelodeon, where brightly colored animals were talking. He read the title and saw that it was 'Backyardigans.' What a stupid name! How were the twins go to learn with shows like that? "Well, there you go. Don't mind me, I'll be correcting a failure's work." The toddler sauntered towards him, staring up at him as with a pleading look. Sheldon groaned, and peered past his laptop's screen to look at the sleepy toddler. "What? Did I put it on the wrong channel?"

"Maddie, peas." Sheldon raised an eyebrow, trying to comprehend what the child was trying to tell him. He didn't have his twin sister—he was sure that she was sleeping soundly in Leonard's room, probably hugging her Winnie the Pooh doll. Then what did he mean by it? He pursed his lips, opened the PDF version of Penny's email and studied it. " _Andy will throw a tantrum if he doesn't get to watch his cartoons in the morning. He'll also get cranky if Maddie isn't with him, which is tricky since Maddie likes to sleep_." Oh! He had never realized that this one had some sort of separation anxiety with his twin. It figures, they always watched cartoons together, which was probably why he never noticed it until now. "You want me to get Maddie?"

The blonde boy nodded, and he stood up, placing his laptop on the couch and proceeded to get the other blonde toddler. He wasn't going to risk dealing with a toddler, if all he had to do was carry the other twin into the room. He slowly opened the door, and found Maddie sprawled across the bed, an arm wrapped around the stuffed doll, and another hand extended to Andy's side of the bed. She was a heavy sleeper, just like her mother. The male version of Penny—Andy, was a light sleeper, and hated naps, the exact opposite of his twin. He quietly approached the bed and tapped the toddler's shoulder, causing one blue eye to open. "Moh-nin?" She muttered, rubbing her tiny hand against her face. "Yes, it's already morning. Your brother wants to watch television with you. So... wake up."

Maddie opened another eye, blinking twice then yawned, and lifted her arms towards him.

Great, she wanted to be lifted, again. What was with this child and getting carried? Andy often wanted to walk on his own—though, he still stumbled sometimes—but this one always wanted to be carried by one of them. He frowned at her, then sighed, there was no use of hesitating, as he knew that he would do it anyway. He slightly bent down, and scooped her up in his arms. As he returned to his normal posture, the toddler snatched her blanket (which was not Disney for once, and was the horrible bright yellow of Spongebob) then snuggled up to him. It was like carrying a cat, it kept on snuggling towards him. He carried the toddler to the living room, where Andy was already sitting on his couch, seemingly engrossed with the show. He placed Maddie on her couch, tucking the blanket at her sides, then returned to his spot to ridicule Kripke's work.

It took Sheldon a moment to realize that Maddie had gotten up from her couch—Andy still stuck on his show—her blanket dragging along behind her. She didn't seem to care much about the cartoons, and had trailed over to Sheldon, her hand clutching her blanket loosely at her side. Sheldon looked down at the toddler, frowning slightly as the kid was fixing him with a sleep, uncertain look; as though she was contemplating something. She was looking straight into her temporary guardian's eyes, and maintained the eye contact, remembering that ignoring the twins lead to no good.

"Can I help you?" He asked, trying not to sound too uninterested, and thought of random things that the child might want. "Are you hungry? Feeling like you want to build a nuclear laser using an easy bake oven that you're planning on asking me to buy? Or are you thinking of traveling the world via hot air balloon and want to ask me for a loan for your traveling fees? Or do you want to ask me for help in designing a Death Star inspired playground that you will ask as a birthday present from your mother for your upcoming second birthday?"

Maddie stared at him for another second, before carelessly tossing her blanket up onto the couch; the end of it hitting his laptop, then Sheldon in the face. He grunted, pushing the blanket away from his eyes, and watched as Maddie clambered up onto the couch carefully, lifting the blanket up and crawling underneath it. Sheldon felt his own body tense as Maddie leaned against his side, and snuggled up to him. She pulled the blanket over herself, and Sheldon waited as he held his breath, waiting for something to happen. He suddenly felt an odd... feeling pass through him. He wasn't sure what it was, and he was sure that he had never felt it before. It was something warm, and fuzzy and he wanted to shake it off.

And after a few moments of waiting, Sheldon realized that Maddie wasn't going anywhere, and that she was already fast asleep. His body was still tensed, but as he looked down at the little girl lying comfortable against his side, as though... she belonged there. He felt  _something_. A slight unexplainable connection—nothing too strong, but something that reminded him of home. Something calming, that made him relax even if a toddler he barely knew was invading his personal space. The feeling he was currently having was confusing him to a great extent, but his body (and his mind) told him to ignore it, and continue his work. Having the toddler beside him was comforting, like his mother or his Meemaw's hugs, that always made him feel lighter—happier. So he allowed the toddler to sleep, and he continued to dissect Kripke's disappointing work. He didn't even notice that a small smile had tugged on his lips the entire time that he sat with the toddler. And that he found that day to be one of his more better days, where he thought nothing could go wrong.

It was also the the day that he realized that the twins weren't too bad.

* * *

 **Monday;**  end of task.

* * *

Exactly a week had passed, and Leonard agreed that miracles did happen.

And entire week went by, and not a single complaint from Sheldon. Not including the incident where the twins called him not fun, as Sheldon really didn't complain about it.

The miracle that he was talking about, was that in a span of a  _day_ something changed in Sheldon that none of them could comprehend. From the sulking, moping Sheldon to an optimistic, less annoying one that actually  _interacted_  with the twins. Yes, he wasn't kidding—his roommate really was kinder to the twins, friendlier and everything un-Sheldon like that they thought that they had crossed over into a different dimension. Well, he was somewhat exaggerating, but compared to the Sheldon who ignored the twins, and was inexplicably rude to them, this Sheldon who even  _smiled_  at them was a huge change! And in under a day, too! It was as if Sheldon finally stopped hating children (or specifically the twins) and even had a 0.0001 kb of space just for liking them. A miracle, indeed!

The only problem was, that though Sheldon was now more civil and friendlier to the twins, he was still the same condescending Sheldon to the rest of them.

"I have succeeded, Leonard, therefore you must admit that I was right, and you were wrong." The normal Sheldon stated, calmly sipping tea from his desk. "I get your miniature Batmobile. Fun."

Leonard turned to Raj and Howard, who were also staring at Sheldon, then cleared his throat. "Well, uh, I guess you did prove me wrong, but didn't you find taking care of the twins tedious? Even once?"

Sheldon made a noise akin to huffing, that sounded a bit like him snorting before swiveling his chair to face his friends. "I must admit, though, taking care of them is not easy. At all, and I do believe that I owe you an apology for underestimating the task of babysitting. Though, I did not find it hard, it also was not as easy as I thought."

Leonard grinned, awestruck at what Sheldon admitted. He turned to Raj and Howard, who were still silently staring at Sheldon. "Guys! Did you record that? Sheldon apologizing! Did you hear it?" The two still didn't move, their attention still focused on Sheldon. "Hello? Are you guys even listening to me?" He snapped a finger in front of Raj's face, who finally broke out from his trance. "Dude, I'm sorry, I stopped listening when I noticed that Sheldon placed that odd shaped clay model on his desk."

"Clay model...?" The experimental physicist raised an eyebrow, then turned to look at Sheldon's desk. Laptop, files, speakers, crap, more crap... and at the very end of the desk, were two disfigured clay models. It wouldn't mean much to most people, and would even confuse others, but the three silent men knew what those clay dolls were. They were the clay sculptures that the twins made before, that they wanted to show Sheldon, that the theoretical physicist insensitively ignored a week before.

The three men all smiled at the small progress made by their friend.


	5. Disorganized Fights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A trip to the park goes wrong when Andy and Maddie get caught up in a fight.

**The future;**  thirteen years later.

* * *

Andy was concentrating on reading his copy of  _A Clockwork Orange_  when his twin sister practically kicked his door down, marching into his room and slapping the book out of his hands. With a small sigh, he gazed up at the fuming blonde, "what do you want, Maddie?" He picked the book up, rotating it in his hands to see if there were any damages—it was a first edition that he received from a director that wanted him to play  _Alex_  in a remake. It was going to follow the book word by word (unlike the movie that deviated from the book, but was awesome nonetheless) and the director suggested that he read the actual book, first. Sadly, his mom would go crazy if he even so much as thought about accepting the role, and he politely rejected it. "Nothing too adult until you're twenty-one, I told you that already!" She'd tell him without a second thought whatsoever.

"You took my Pooh doll!" His twin exclaimed, and Andy simply stared at her. With all the years of living with her and the nearly nine months of sharing a womb, he was already accustomed to her sudden outbursts. It wasn't new; his sister got easily annoyed over everything. Once, when they were playing tennis (and he was embarrassingly losing) his twin sister got mad at him for aiming the tennis ball at the wrong direction, claiming that he was cheating. If he was going to cheat, he would've made sure that he won! "No, I didn't, Maddie. What would I even do with your stupid doll?"

Maddie clenched her teeth, placing her hands on her hips, "it's not a stupid doll, dear  _bother!_  You know that it's important to me, and it's been with me since we were babies! Now where did you hide it?"

"I didn't take anything, dear  _blister._ " His sister's face contorted in anger, and he glared at the blue eyes they once had in common. Their mom said that he used to have blue eyes when he was a baby—and the thousands of pictures were a definite proof of that—but when he was around two, it drastically changed to a shade of green that was close to the ones their mom had. Although, Maddie would sometimes point out that his eyes looked blue when hit by sunlight—but Uncle Raj was the only one who was happy about it, for some unknown reason. Something about how he looked like a Disney prince straight out from the movies—which was odd, as there were seldom blonde princes. He and Maddie decided that their uncle was just too much of a hopeless romantic, or something like that. Andy stood up from his bed, grabbing a doll that sat on top of his bedside table. "If it means so much to you then take my Woody the Cowboy doll." He held the vintage doll towards her, shaking it as he grinned at her. "It even has my name underneath! That would sell for a good hundred dollars."

"Your narcissism is unbelievable," the other blonde hissed, smacking the doll from his hand. "And all Woody dolls have Andy on their foot because of Toy Story—not cause of you! Will you just cut this out and return my doll to me?"

Andy quickly picked up his precious doll and returned it to his bedside table. "Is this because I ate the entire cake Aunt Bernadette brought us yesterday, because you and your kleptomaniac self took my new watch?" She always did those kind of things; taking his things for no reason which infuriated him to a great extent. Why she had to steal his stuff, he didn't know. Maybe she really was a kleptomaniac. He'd have to tell mom about this, after he gets his sister to calm down.

"Maybe, maybe not. Maybe I'm accusing you because you're really not my brother!" Maddie huffed, shaking her head at her twin. "But since we're on this subject; one, I am not a kleptomaniac, and two, I hope you get diabetes for eating all of that cake that we were supposed to share! I wouldn't accuse you of taking my Pooh doll just because you ate the cake! You probably took it because I turned down that tie-in role as your twin!" As if he'd stoop as low as her, taking something just to get back at her. Thr movie she turned down wasn't good, anyway. "Now, give my doll back! It's my good luck charm and you know that!"

"Oh, is your tennis match, today?" Andy inquired, staring blankly at her sister. "Then maybe you should just go and practice instead of badgering me of something I didn't do." The blonde teenager walked over to his door and held it open for his sister. He had a hunch where the stupid bear was hiding, and he was going to end this discussion once and for all. Or else he might tolchok his sister—but his mom wouldn't be too happy about that. Or knowing that he was reading the book she said not to read until he was eighteen. "Now, come on. I think I know where your stupid doll is."

Maddie pointed a finger at him as she strolled past the door, "aha! I knew that you took it, you big liar! Mom is so gonna get mad at you when I tell on you, you big jerk!"

Andy sighed, closing his door, "we'll see about that."

* * *

 **Present;**  year 2012.

* * *

"Mommy! Did ya' kno dat Sedon a ayn-tist?"

"Andy! Sedon a  _pi-sissst_ , not a ayn-tist!"

"Ayn-tist and pi-sisissst same."

"Not same! Is  _pi-sissst_  not pi-sisissst."

"Come on, give me a ten—NO! Not jail! Dude, how do I even get sent to jail because of jaywalking? Isn't that a bit too much?"

"Maybe you robbed someone  _while_  jaywalking," Howard suggested, rolling the dice, "hey! Free parking! I'm rich! Here's my card, please add some moolah!"

"Dude, how did you even get that money from free parking? Did you kill someone at that parking and like, steal their wallet? If so, you should be in jail, and not me."

"I don't understand why I have to pay so much for a stupid hotel each time I stop at a street," Leonard mumbled, grabbing Howard's Monopoly ATM card and transacted the payment with the electronic banker. "Who even goes from one street to the other just to stay at an overpriced hotel? Don't I have a home? And who's idea was it to use the electronic Monopoly version?"

"I still don't get why I'm the only one who lands in jail! We've been playing this game for three hours now, and it seems that I'm the only criminal! How racist!"

"No use complaining when you just charged me too much for landing on your stupid property! The ceiling is leaking in your hotel, and the service is terrible!"

Sheldon placed his hand in front of his forehead and pinched his temples in frustration. It was far too noisy for his liking, and nothing was going the way it was supposed to go. For some unknown reason, Wii bowling night turned into board game night and now his colleagues had spent the last three hours trying to understand the logic in Monopoly. Then, because of their irritating cacophony, the twins woke up from their sleep and had officially ruined their sleeping schedule that he had so delicately planned to ensure a non-cranky toddler. He'd have to give the toddlers a bath,  _again_ , just so that they'd get sleepy and return to sleeping. But that would be nearly next to impossible as the Monopoly game had turned into some sort of debate that even he couldn't understand due to the stupidity of it all. He was starting to get a migraine from all of the ruckus, and he had a strong urge to finally end the madness.

"Maddie, ayn-tist and pi-sisisst same!"

"No, it not, Andy! Ayn-tist dif-unt!"

"I'm a  _physicist_ ," Sheldon interrupted, swiveling his chair to face the camera that was set up above the tv. "And your mother knows that I'm a physicist, she's known that for a long time, now."

Penny raised an eyebrow as Sheldon appeared on her screen, taking a long sip of her morning coffee. "Hey, Sheldon. How nice of you to finally say hi to me." She watched the physicist frown at her as the three men argued in the background. This was actually the first time she talked to Sheldon since he deemed her as a 'friend.' Whenever she called in, Sheldon barely peeked at the screen to say hello, and when he did, it was usually him telling Leonard on how he wanted the twins to leave already. Leonard said that Sheldon no longer hated her (she doubted it) and asked that she be civil to him, as Sheldon promised to be, as well. "How's life going for the great Sheldon Cooper?"

"Life is well for the great  _Doctor_  Sheldon Cooper," the physicist corrected and Penny resisted to end the call right then and there. "Actually, subtly well as the president of the university forced me to go on another horrible week of vacation, and I am not happy about it." Penny found it oddly amusing how Sheldon was probably the only person in the world who detested vacations. It was as if all he was made to do was work, play video games, stick to his strict routine and look down on majority of the world's population. He must have found it fun. "And then he threatened that shall I not take it, I will be banned from the university for a month, and even I know that it's a thinly veiled ploy for another vacation. Regardless, I joined in this discussion not only to correct your children's mistakes, but to inform you to wrap this up as your children really needs to sleep."

Andy tilted his head at Sheldon, frowning in distaste. "Andy no want seep! Andy not seepy!" Sheldon raised an eyebrow at the toddler and pursed his lips. "Everyday since you've arrived in this apartment, you have gone to bed by at least eight. It's ten thirty, and this will surely disrupt your sleeping schedule."

The blonde actress listened closely as Sheldon ranted to her twins about how they needed to go to sleep. She checked her phone, and saw that it  _was_  past the time for the twins to go to sleep. Which meant that Leonard wasn't lying when he said that Sheldon was actually taking care of the twins! When the bespectacled physicist first told her about the interaction, she laughed (once she logged off) and thought that Leonard was going insane. It sounded like one big joke, and she decided it  _was_  one. Until now. Maybe,  _just maybe_  she misjudged her former neighbor. Regardless, she still needed actually proof. Just because Sheldon spent his time trying to get a sleeping schedule for the twins didn't mean that he actually  _likes_  them. It just means that he was getting used to them, and that meant that Leonard's plan was working. Holy crap on a cracker. "You made them a sleeping schedule?"

Sheldon turned towards her and sent her a look that screamed how-dumb-can-you-get? Some things never do change. "Of course! Organization in one's life is, and will never be frowned upon. Don't tell me you just let them sleep whenever they want to?"

The blonde shook her head, grabbing a sliced baguette and started spreading butter on it. "No, I don't. It's not good for them to sleep whenever they feel like it, and if you let them, Maddie will sleep all day and be up all night." She bit off the bread, and continued, slightly amused at how Sheldon frowned at the sight of her eating and talking at the same time. "I was just shocked that you passed on your crazy love for scheduling everything on to my children. But in a good way, I assure you."

"Yes, well, you know how I enjoy cultivating people into getting more civilized." Sheldon nonchalantly said and Penny absentmindedly nodded in agreement; she could still remember how he tried to use chocolate as positive reinforcement in order to get rid of her bad habits. At first she thought that he just felt generous enough to give her some delicious chocolates, then Leonard pointed it out and, well, she wasn't as happy as she previously was. She gained half a pound cause of those chocolates—which wasn't much—but it was still something. "By the time you retrieve your children, they'll be organized and even better than they were before." Penny glared at him, and Sheldon continued, not wanting to hear more badgering of how he was treating her children badly. "Not that they aren't satisfactory, I am just filling in the gap that you left. You'll be pleased to know that they have now gotten used to not having their bottles. And it only took three days!" He turned to the twins, who were watching him interact with their mother. "Show your mother your newfound skill."

Maddie blinked, then grabbed her sippy cup—which featured a cartoon version of Wonder Woman—and took a sip out of it. "Mommy, Maddie want Pooh sip-ee ca-uhp, peas."

Andy raised his sippy cup, scrutinizing the characters on it. He knew Sup-eh-mehn, but he didn't know who the rest was. Like his twin sister, he wanted something different. "Mommy, Andy want dif-unt ca-uhp, too! Os-cah da ga-ouch, peas."

"What do you mean you want different cups?" Sheldon asked in surprise, crossing his arms. "How is a gluttonous bear, and a green  _thing_ —that resides in a filthy beyond imaginable trashcan—better than the Justice League?"

Andy stared at him, then turned to his mother who was on the screen, still eating her breakfast. "Ookie Mahn-stah okay, too."

"Sheldon will get you the characters you want," Penny assured with a small smile, causing Sheldon's frown to deepen, and the twins to feel content. "I gotta say, Sheldon, I'm pretty impressed at how you got them to use something other than a bottle. I tried doing that for about a week, but they didn't seem to like it." The theoretical physicist smirked; happy that his former neighbor appreciated his efforts to cultivate the toddlers. "It should not surprise you that I excel in various things, Penny." She couldn't understand why, but Penny suddenly felt a stinging twinge on her hip from the pure arrogance in Sheldon's tone. She really had to get that spot where some scars used to be checked. "Such as convincing children to take a step higher in the ladder of progress. If I managed to get Leonard to maintain a bathroom schedule, innovating a child's schedule is easy."

"Dude, you just got bankrupt!" Raj exclaimed at Leonard, tearing Sheldon's attention from the blonde on the tv. "Which means that I win!" Leonard stared at his game account balance, then glared at the astrophysicist. "You cheated! I know you cheated!"

Howard snickered, returning the property cards to it's places in the box. "I told you he was a cheater, yet no one believed me."

Raj's smile dropped, turning to his best friend and narrowing his eyes at him. "You got a problem with me?"

Leonard shook his head, moving to his desk chair as the two best friends started to fight. "I swear, Raj seriously cheated," he told Sheldon who simply stared at him. "Hey, Penny, how's breakfast?"

"I've been on this screen for nearly half an hour, now," Penny stated, moving from the bread to her actual breakfast; eggs Benedict, a side of bacon and pork and beans. How she loved room service. "How is it that you only noticed me, now? Even Sheldon talked to me." Leonard rubbed the back of his head, ashamed to have ignored the blonde. "It was a really intense game of Monopoly, sorry about that. Which reminds me, the twins should go to sleep, now."

"Andy no want seep!" The toddler exclaimed, looking very affronted at the mention of sleeping. The three adults mentally noted to be cautious of using the word 'sleep' around Andy. Maddie yawned loudly, a tiny hand covering her face. "Maddie wike seep, but no want mommy bye bye."

Penny sighed at the sight of her children; she longed to be the ones to tuck them into bed, but she still had a month and a half to go. This was another one of those times when she wished she had just brought her kids along—but with her tight schedule, it would be next to impossible for her to do her job, and watch over them. Had she brought them along, they'd either be left at the hotel or the trailer the entire day, and she didn't want that. She barely even had time to explore Paris as the director wanted everything to be done in one cut, so they could wrap the Paris scenes and return to shoot in California. They had to quicken up shooting so that the movie could premiere at an earlier date, and so that it could be submitted to one of the film festivals. Which was why not bringing the twins was a good thing, they were better off at Sheldon and Leonard's. At least with them, the twins would be properly cared for... or something akin to that. "You two need to get back to sleep, you know. I promise to talk to you again tomorrow morning."

"Speaking of tomorrow," Howard interjected, ignoring Raj's snide comments on how he was a sore loser. "We're all planning on going to the park, tomorrow, and we were wondering if it would be okay for you to join in via Skype."

"Hmm... I'm free from five in the afternoon to five thirty," Penny mused while glancing at her schedule that was stuck on the table. "And again at around seven—I think I can call in. Assuming that you can manage to get fast internet speed at the park? What are you guys even going to do there?"

Howard eagerly nodded, "of course, we can! And we're planning on having a robot rematch cause  _someone_ ," Raj snorted from the couch, "cheated. Plus, Bernie's going to be free tomorrow, since she's been busy working on a raccoon virus breakout and hasn't been able to see the twins. Tomorrow's pretty much her first free day—" Sheldon raised an eyebrow, holding a hand up to interrupt the engineer. "The continuation of our Robot Wars is tomorrow?"

Leonard frowned, confused on why Sheldon's eidetic memory was failing him. "Yeah, didn't we agree at the park that we'd fight again, tomorrow?"

The theoretical physicist furrowed his eyebrows, his lips slightly pursed in thought. How could he have forgotten that the final tournament was tomorrow? He had spent the last three days improving his Sheldroid that it was impossible for him to forget. But he had, and now he was caught in a minor pickle. "It seems that I can't make it, as I have plans to have lunch with Amy tomorrow."

Penny raised her eyebrows in a mixture of shock and confusion. "Who's Amy?"

"Sheldon's girlfriend," Leonard said, sending Sheldon a mocking smile.

"Sheldon has a girlfriend?"

"She's not my girlfriend," Sheldon corrected, glancing at his grinning roommate then at the confused blonde on their tv screen.

Andy tilted his head to the side as his mother started to squeal through the tv. He and his twin had retreated to their couches, as the adults had huddled up in front of the tv. "Maddie, wat guh-fend? And who Aye-mee?"

Maddie scrunched her nose in distaste at the noise the adults were making. She was feeling sleepy, and wanted to go to bed, already. But her twin was still engrossed in the conversation the adults were having, therefore, he wasn't sleepy. Maybe, she could leave him here and she could return to their room. "Dunno. Maddie seepy."

"No seep!" Andy vehemently said, shaking his head at his twin. "Andy not seepy!" Maddie narrowed her eyes at her twin brother; if he wanted a fight he was going to get a fight. Sleep was the only thing she wanted right now.

"How long has this been going on?"

"About two years."

"She's  _not_  my girlfriend."

"Are you telling me that for the past year that we've all been meeting and catching up, I have been asking 'what's new' and you never thought to go with Sheldon has a girlfriend?" The blonde dramatically asked, shaking her head in disbelief that Leonard never told her about this. This was big,  _big_ news that should have been delivered to her! Such vital information should be shared—cause, it's important! Had she known about this, her decision regarding Leonard's 'plan' might have been different. She really couldn't believe what she was hearing—Sheldon had a girlfriend! The day that they thought would never happen actually came!

"She's  _not_  my girlfriend—"

Penny waved her hand dismissively, wishing that she could be in the same room with the others. "How did they meet?"

"About two years ago, Raj and I entered Sheldon's information in a dating site and it spit out Amy Farrah Fowler." Howard answered, returning the board game to the shelf. "We call them Shamy."

"Alright, everyone pay attention," Sheldon commanded, having had enough of the continuous insistence on a non existing relationship between his female friend. "Yes, I have a friend name Amy Farrah Fowler. Yes, she is female. Yes, we communicate on a daily basis. Yes, we are all well acquainted with her and often hang out with her—except Penny—but,  _no_ , she is  _not_  my girlfriend." His words hung in the air like a nasty smell, and he hoped that he had finally ended their annoying mockery of his and Amy's relationship. This was one of the times where he wished he really could make a machine that would dissect people's brains and rearrange the nerves to remove the cons. It was always like this whenever he mentioned Amy, his three friends would always play the 'girlfriend' card. Which was why he (at first) limited the inclusion of Amy to their group, but somehow, Leonard and the others always found a way to drag her along. Now, whenever Bernadette was tagging along, Amy joined, too. The two female scientists even formed an odd friendship throughout the years. "Let this be the last time that I explain myself, gentlemen." He turned to the blonde who had a goofy grin on her face. "And Penny."

Raj took a swig of beer—he had been fixing something during the entire conversation, and was dying to finally speak up. Even if the blonde was just talking via a screen, he still could not seem to talk to his friend. He could talk to Bernadette (without drinking) but only after they fixed the whole crush he had on her, and when Howard and the microbiologist got engaged. Amy normally tried to get him to talk to her, as she found his problem interesting, but he could only manage to say yes or no to her. Penny was a whole different case, which was why he had to at least take a sip of alcohol. "Dude, why don't you just bring Amy along, tomorrow? We're going to have pot luck for lunch, and I'd like someone who isn't any of you to taste my recipe on roast duck."

"Great idea, Raj," Leonard remarked, before turning to Sheldon whose frown only deepened. "Why don't you ask her if she'd like to join us? It's been a while since she hanged out with us."

"Amy isn't much a fan of the outdoors," Sheldon informed them with a bored tone. "Unless it's a house on a prairie, a prairie or set in the medieval times. Or a harp convention held in an amphitheater that is located within a park. She'll most likely say no."

Raj lifted his phone, smirking at the theoretical physicist. "That's a bit contradictory as I just texted Amy to ask if she wanted to go and she just said yes." He extended his arm towards Sheldon, who grabbed the phone and read the message. "She only said yes because you mentioned that Bernadette was going to be there! I cannot believe she quickly forgot about our plans just because she wants to spend time with Bernadette. How insulting."

Penny had to restrain herself from laughing as she watched Sheldon go on about how his female friend should have asked him first. "You know, Sheldon, you should thank Raj for setting this up! This could be your first date!" She saw Leonard chuckle, then spoke. "Actually, they already had their first date about a year ago. I chaperoned it, cause I was the one who questioned the relationship. It was a really awkward night for the three of us."

Sheldon sent Leonard a glare, then sighed in defeat. "Alright, I guess I am joining the robot match. But this better be the last time that you manipulate my friend without asking my permission first!"

"Aww, Sheldon's getting all embarrassed," Howard teased, causing the others, except Sheldon, to laugh. "It's so touching to see our Sheldon finally—" the engineer was cut off by a light thump on the floor, instinctively making them turn around to see the twins arguing behind them.

"Dat Maddie ca-uhp!" Maddie gasped, glancing down to the floor where her sippy cup fell, then glared at her twin brother. "Andy say soh-ee!"

Andy folded his arms over his chest, eyebrows squeezed together and his light blue eyes meeting the angry, slightly darker shade of blue eyes. "No! Andy not soh-ee. Andy no want seep!"

Maddie pointed a finger towards the cup on the floor, "Andy do dat, so say soh-ee, and Andy seep cos' Maddie seepy!" Her twin brother stuck out his chin in defiance, and Maddie only got even more frustrated.

"Twins? Are you fighting?" Penny worried asked, and the four scientists briefly wondered if the blonde saw the scenario differently.

Maddie whipped her head towards the screen, tears forming in her eyes out of anger at her brother. "Andy make ca-uhp fah—fohhl! Andy no want seep and Maddie seepy and Andy no say soh-ee!"

"See? I told you this was ruining their sleeping schedule," groused Sheldon, shaking his head as he stood from his chair to walk over to the twins couches. "Stop fighting, as the subject of your argument is truly idiotic. You will sleep, whether you like it or not."

"No seep!" Andy cried, turning his head away from the adult.

"Do they normally fight like this?" Howard curiously asked, turning to Penny. "They get into fights every now and then, but not about sleeping," Penny responded watching as Sheldon continued another rant. "Sheldon, I think they should go to sleep or they'll get even crankier."

Sheldon snorted from where he stood, "Penny, I've been doing this for nearly two weeks now. I know what I'm doing." He bent down to level his gaze with the two cranky toddlers; he was not going to deal with a temper tantrum this late. Effective today, he was banning the use of Monopoly from eight onward. It should only be played in the morning if the players were that noisy. With a deep breath, he pulled on the most intimidating look he could muster, and glared at the two toddlers. He'd had some trouble with getting the twins (Andy) to sleep recently, and sometimes he just had to put his foot down. The male toddler often put up a fight, but gave in quickly if he realized that resistance was futile. "You're going to go to sleep,  _now_ , and I'm not taking no for an answer."

Andy held up the glaring contest, and Sheldon was reminded of Penny when he banned her from the apartment. He had the same glimmer in his eyes that Penny had whenever she disagreed with him. How nostalgic, it felt like it was just yesterday when he triumphantly hung her underwear on the phone line across the street. "If you agree to go to sleep, I'll buy you the sippy cup that you want."

After a moment, Andy's face relaxed and broke into a small content smile. "Okay!"

Sheldon noted that he had to stop buying them over with rewards, or else they'll get used to only doing things on their own accord to get something in return. He read something online saying that children should not get acclimated to getting whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted—which was why he and Leonard were contemplating on whether or not to ban Raj from shopping trips. The astrophysicist spoiled Penny's children too much, and they feared the day that they became spoiled brats. The twins were too easily won over by food and shopping trips that it was no doubt that they were Penny's offsprings. It was just like having two more Pennys that were twenty-four years younger, and more innocent. "Good, now go to your room and get settled for bed. Your mother will even say goodnight to you there."

Maddie stood, sending her twin brother a look of disapproval before scurrying off towards the hall. Once she disappeared, Andy followed after, and they all wondered how they were going to sleep beside each when they obviously were still mad.

"So... tomorrow?" Leonard awkwardly asked as Sheldon returned to his desk. "You still up for tomorrow, Penny?"

Penny stared in awe at the half-seen Sheldon through her screen. How did he get Andy to go to sleep so easily? Even though they listened to everything she said, there were still some rare times when Andy didn't want to sleep. And had Sheldon not spoke so calmly, she would have gotten mad at him for looking at her son so... evilly! But it worked! Because of shopping—they really were her kids! She was starting to believe what Leonard said about Sheldon taking care of her kids, and it was like getting ice cold water dumped on her. She felt somewhat guilty for doubting Leonard and not trusting Sheldon but felt a wave of relief wash over her at knowing that Sheldon really was getting accustomed to her kids. Maybe, he even liked them! She would've laughed, but somehow the thought didn't seem so impossible. Now she had proof. Wow. "Yeah, I'm still up for tomorrow."

"Let's end this banal chit chat so that the twins can finally descend into slumber," Sheldon snarled, gesturing to Howard. "Move the Skype call onto Leonard's laptop so that Penny can say goodnight to the twins. Any second later and I'll be the cranky one." Howard silently nodded, moving to Leonard's laptop and opening Skype and telling Penny that he was going to end the call and transfer it.

The blonde dumbly nodded as the call was disconnected. There was something just, so very surreal about seeing Sheldon and her twins together, and it left her rather nonplussed. She only managed to shake out the bizarre feeling when the call started up again, and she saw her twins getting ready for bed.

* * *

Sheldon found the park oddly only moderately populated for a Sunday. Normally, whenever they flew their kites or tested out one of Wolowitz's inventions, the park was swarming with people. Today, there was still a good number of people who could easily trample him, just not as expected. Which was splendid, as he did not like other people in the park, anyway. The twins had a tendency to play with other children, and that meant that they could get various unwanted germs from all those children who played with other unknown children. There were about five children playing at the playground, and with that small number, he could easily track down whoever would pass some kind of disease to the twins.

Leonard and Sheldon were currently sitting at a picnic table that was placed at a isolated area, inspecting their robots when Howard and the others arrived.

"Aun-teh Beh-na-det!" The twins—who were sitting down on a blanket on the grass, drawing—exclaimed once they saw the petite blonde walking up to them alongside their uncles and one unfamiliar person.

"Hey kids!" Bernadette greeted as the toddlers ran up to her, and she crouched down to give them a hug. It had been a while since she saw Penny's kids, and had admittedly missed the tykes. In all honesty, they were the only children she actually liked, and—don't tell Howard—she was warming up to the idea of having kids because of them. "How are you guys?"

"Andy du-woh mommy!" He grabbed the half finished picture, that looked like five different colors had a nasty fight. In the middle of the plethora of colors was a yellow stick person, who could either be Penny, or one of the twins. "See, dat mommy!"

Maddie took her drawing, and handed it to the older blonde. It was a simple drawing of a circle, with a darker circle at the top right of it. "Maddie du-woh det stah," she said, tapping her finger on a single line inside the circle, "dat Dat Bedah!" The guys were already rubbing off on the children.

The microbiologist grinned down at her close friend's children, returning their drawings before patting their heads. "Those are great, you should finish them and show them to your mom when she gets back." The toddlers nodded, placing their drawings back down on the blanket, as Sheldon walked over to them. "You're right on time, Leonard has just finished setting up his laptop to call Penny," Sheldon said, nodding at Bernadette in acknowledgement, then at the other three people standing behind the blonde. "Amy, hello. I must say I'm shocked to see that you decided to join us. You don't really care for the outdoors, am I right."

"Yes, that is true," answered the stranger, "but I do care for the beach. I don't care to swim, but the sound of the waves crashing against the sand is music to my ears. Also, I did not want to miss a chance to spend some time with Bernadette."

Andy watched closely as Sheldon started talking to the stranger who arrived with the three adults. He had never seen her before, and he wondered if she was just a passerby. He extended his hand towards Sheldon, tugging on his shirt to get his attention. "Sedon, who dat?" He asked, pointing a finger at the brunette who was still silently standing behind Bernadette. Sheldon raised an eyebrow, and followed the direction of his finger to Amy.

"That's Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler, she is a neurobiologist, and my friend." Amy blinked at him, then tilted her head down to look at the two toddlers who were staring at her. On the way to the park, Bernadette and Howard had mentioned something about infants joining them. She didn't pay much attention to it, as she was just excited to spend more time with her friends. Now that she was facing the infants in person, it occurred to her that Sheldon had never mentioned anything about them, before. They were clearly staying with Sheldon and Leonard as Bernadette, Howard and Raj were her ride here. If they were staying with them, they would have rode together with her. Which brought her to the first question she had; who were these children, anyway? Were they Leonard's? Sheldon's? How utterly confusing, she hated not having answers. On the other hand, these children seemed quite... familiar. She just couldn't put her finger on it.

Bernadette spoke up, placing a hand on the brunette's shoulder. "Amy, this is Andy, and Maddie. They're our friend Penny's kids." The twins both held up a hand, sheepishly waving up at the neurobiologist who was secretly scrutinizing them. "And twins, this is Amy, she's our friend."

"Hello," Amy stoically said, unsure of how to respond to the toddlers, "it's nice to meet you." The three stared at each other for another moment before Andy stepped forward and waved again. "Andy! Nah-uhs to meet ya' Aye-mee!" Andy grinned widely, turning to Maddie who was standing still. "Dat Andy tuh-win Maddie! Maddie say hi!" The other twin frowned slightly, then took a step forward to stand beside her twin. "Hi."

Bernadette was watching the scene closely, deciding that it was one of—if not the most—awkwardest scenes she had ever seen in her entire life. Worst than when her parents met Mrs. Wolowitz, which was overflowing with discomfort. Especially, when the wedding arrangements were brought up—it was like watching an intense episode of Dr. Phil. She turned to Sheldon, who seemed to be observing the scene as she was. "That went rather... well?" The theoretical physicist nodded, sighing once Amy stood and made her way towards the picnic table. "It's like the day when my mother walked into Missy's room while she was making out with one of Junior's friends. It was as uncomfortable as it was messy, but this was just uncomfortable." The two nodded in understanding, still feeling the remnants of discomfort from observing the scene in front of them.

"Hey guys, Penny's online!" Leonard called, snapping Sheldon and Bernadette from their unease. "Hi Penny! How's everything there?" Howard serenely asked as Sheldon, Bernadette and the twins approached the picnic table.

"Hey! I just finished shooting a really awesome fighting scene, and boy, am I tired! But it was fun, and I'm glad I agreed to do my own stunts! It's great exercise!" The blonde answered, smiling through the screen. "So, where's the twins?

"They're right here," said Raj as he helped the twins up the picnic table. Once they reached the top of the bench, the siblings turned to each other and both placed a hand against the other's arm—trying to push the other twin out of the way. "Maddie! Muh-oove!" Andy ordered, a hand clutching the edge of the table, and the other struggling to make his twin move. Maddie—who was still mad at her twin due to the events from the night, before—resisted the shove, and pushed back with equal strength. "No! Maddie talk to mommy! Go away, Andy!"

Howard quickly moved to the other side of the table and tore the twins away from each other. "Hey! Why are you two fighting?"

Penny frowned at the scene that played in front of her; it had been a while since one of her kids' famous fights that lasted for days. This would always stem from something Andy did, that Maddie would hold against her twin, and wouldn't forgive him until he apologized, or did what she wanted to do. Last time, it was because Andy accidentally spilled Maddie's half of their milkshake, and Maddie didn't forgive him until the next day. If only she could jump through via the screen, then maybe she could talk to them and break the fight out. How troubling. "Andy, Maddie, stop fighting! I can talk to both of you at the same time, no need to fight!"

Amy's eyes widened as she finally realized who the blonde on the screen was. It was  _Penny!_  The girl from the famous show that everyone in her department watches! Halfway There! A celebrity! An actually celebrity! She was video calling with an  _actual celebrity!_  Take that, everyone who had ever said that she wouldn't get any friends! How many of the other neurobiologists could say that they had contact with an actual celebrity for more than five minutes? She did! Regardless of the fact that the celebrity was talking via a laptop, and had no idea who she was—it still counted because she said so! Glancing at the screen again, she mentally agreed with the conversations between her colleagues about Penny being gorgeous. She was so pretty! And maybe, they could be  _besties!_  "You're Penny! From Halfway There!"

The blonde tore her attention from her children and turned to glance at the unfamiliar face who was hogging half of the screen. Could this be Sheldon's girlfriend? "Yeah, hi! Could you, perhaps, be Amy? Sheldon's friend?"

There was a high pitched squeal that bothered the rest of the adults, and made the twins momentarily pause their petty argument. They all turned to the brunette who was jumping up and down on the grass, squealing in excitement. The high ranged noised continued for another thirty seconds, and Sheldon  _swore_  that it shattered his ear drums. There went his Vulcan hearing. "Penny, Amy," he interjected, placing a hand in between the screen and the laptop. "This entire minute of squealing has irked me heavily, and as I know how this will end, I will say this now. Penny, do not corrupt my friend." Penny glared at him through the screen, and Amy spun around frowning at her friend. "Sheldon! How dare you ruin my first meeting with the gorgeous Penny! Now, she'll have a bad impression of me. First impressions last, Sheldon!"

"Is she Amy?" A voice from behind Sheldon cooed, causing him to turn and face the blonde who was widely grinning. Suddenly, a hand shoved Sheldon to the side, and Amy leaned closer to the laptop. "Hello, I'm Amy! Don't mind Sheldon, he doesn't know what he's talking about! It's nice to meet you! I've only watched an episode of your show—well, the preview—but my colleagues talk about you all the time! And I have to say that they're very wrong, you're so much prettier in person—well, on screen—and your hair is so much more golden—do you even have pores? Your skin is glowing even with the dim light of that room! Mint green looks so great on you!"

Sheldon shook his head as he (and the others) watched the scene in front of them. This was one gigantic mistake. Penny was surely going to corrupt Amy, and there was no way of stopping it. Who would have thought that Amy would have such an interest in celebrities? He wouldn't have. From would awkward scene, to another. He strongly doubted that they'd get to talk to Penny any time soon. "So, do any of you want to start the robot war?" asked Sheldon, turning towards the others who were dumbly staring at the brunette and the blonde on the screen. "I do not believe that that conversation can be easily ended. I suggest that we continue on with our other activities."

Raj looked at Howard, who was preparing his robot, "we'll go first. Cause  _someone_  wants a re-match." Howard scoffed as he twisted a cap on top of his robot, "that someone wants a re-match, because  _someone_  cheated. Now, stop yapping and let's fight Koothracheater!"

Bernadette sighed at her fiancé and his best friend, it would be futile to join them. The were already fighting on the ride here, and if she joined, she would be completely ignored. "I'll just stay at the picnic table and talk to Penny, and watch over the twins. You two can go and play with your robots." The blonde waved a hand at them before making her way back to the table, where Amy was still talking to Penny and the twins had returned to coloring their pictures.

"So..." Leonard drawled, looking around the park to find a clearing. "Rematch?"

Sheldon smirked, snatching his controller from his bag and turning his robot on. "You're on Hofstadter."

* * *

Andy couldn't believe that he had drawn something so utterly incredible. It's the best picture he's ever done—even if it wasn't finished, yet! It's a picture of his Mommy, and Sheldon, and Uncle Leonard, and him, and that meanie, Maddie. He didn't want to include his sister—cause she was so mean—but she had to, or else mommy would get mad. His Mommy looked so lifelike! He didn't forget the fingers this time, and all he needed to do was color in Mommy's skin. But there was a problem, a  _big_  problem.

The orange crayon was missing!

He decided that Mommy's (and everyone else's) skin shouldn't be colored yellow since Mommy's, his, and the meanie's hair was yellow. He would use orange for the skin, instead—but it was  _missing!_  All he needed to do was color in Mommy, then he could show it off, once Amy stops talking to his Mommy. But he was kind of glad that Amy was still talking to Mommy, or else he would have to show his picture while unfinished! How horrifying!

He placed his yellow crayon down, and stopped to think. Maddie was the one who used the orange crayon. But he didn't  _want_  to talk to that meanie! Then, he guessed, he'd have to show the picture like that. It was already amazing on it's own, and he knew that his Mommy would understand if she didn't have any skin. It was either green or none, and he didn't want Mommy to look like a monster. He should have just used the green crayon on Maddie, so Mommy would have some skin. This would be the last time he ever included that meanie in his pictures!

Standing, he picked up his picture off the blanket, with every intention of showing it to Aunt Bernadette then to Mommy. When she comes back from her trip, she'll probably put it in her room, where she framed all of their drawing. He felt that this one  _deserved_  to be in the center, of course, until he made one even better! Which wasn't shocking, cause he made the best drawings! Maddie's never made sense—it was always scribbles that wasn't pretty, at all. If she wasn't so mean, maybe he'd helped her with the coloring. Pfft. As if he'd help that meanie!

Then, a familiar hand snatched it away, which was actually Maddie stepping away from him.

That meanie!

"Maddie!" Andy yelled, pointing an angry finger at his twin. "Dat Andy's! Guh-eeve it back!"

Maddie narrowed her eyes at her twin brother. She was very mad at her twin brother! She was there, on her side of the blanket, coloring her pictures when her orange crayon disappeared! She looked everywhere (on the blanket) and even under her mess of crayons. She needed that crayon for; one, to draw the squiggly line on Sheldon's red shirt that he always wore, and two, because if she didn't have it in her set of crayons, Mommy, Sheldon and Uncle Leonard would get mad! One crayon  _could not_  be missing or else the crayons wouldn't be complete! Sure, it might have been her fault for not placing her crayons in one straight line like Andy did, and how her Mommy said, but why did she have to? Organizing was not fun, at all! Therefore, she never aligned her crayons like Andy did. Which was why she knew that it was Andy who took the crayon! She placed the orange crayon  _on top_  of the pile of crayons, and Andy could have easily snatched it! When would he stop making her mad?

"Andy took oh-wandge ca-yon," accused Maddie, holding up the picture above her head. "Guh-eeve it back."

Her twin gasped, obviously affronted. "Andy no take, Maddie take! Guh-eeve du-woh-ing back!"

How dare Andy say that she took the orange crayon! If she had it, she wouldn't be saying that he took it! She didn't blame him for no reason! Andy was always like this, even if he was the one who took it! If Mommy was here, she would surely take her side, because Andy was wrong. She didn't have proof, that was true, but if it wasn't Andy, who took it? She wasn't going to say sorry for blaming him! He hadn't even said sorry for dropping her sippy cup yesterday! She would only say sorry, if he said sorry. And  _if_  he returned the orange crayon. Sadly, she couldn't stay mad at him forever (she would if she could) because they lived together, and they were twins, and had the same Mommy and Daddy—but! She could at least be mad for a day. And she wouldn't forgive him until he said sorry.

Andy wanted to scream in frustration—his drawing was getting wrinkled from the way his twin was holding it—but that would mean that she had won. Maddie loved to win, and he was not going to give her that luxury. Maybe, he should cry! But... he wasn't a baby like that meanie who cried all the time! Aha! He suddenly got the greatest idea that he ever had—he was going to tell on her! Justice would be swift, and he'd get the orange crayon and finally be able to show his finished drawing to Mommy! Maddie would surely lose this one! This victory would be wonderful, especially when he sees his Mommy's delighted face at the sight of his incredible masterpiece!

With a small grin, he spun around and prepared his battle cry. "Aun-teh Beh-na-de—" he abruptly stopped (much to Maddie's delight) when he saw that Aunt Bernadette was missing from the picnic table. Where did she go? She couldn't approach the table to tattle anymore, because it was just Amy and Mommy. And Mommy would see the unfinished drawing.

"Ha! Dat wat Andy get foh taking ca-yon!" His twin laughed, waving the paper carelessly in the air. How infuriating! No matter, he still had a backup plan. Justice would still prevail!

_"Sedoooooooon!"_

* * *

"Oh no," Bernadette muttered, closing the basket filled with food. "We forgot to bring paper plates. Amy, I'm just going to go and buy some. Will you be okay, here?"

Amy quickly glanced at the blonde beside her, then back at the effervescent blonde on the screen. "Yeah, yeah, sure. So, Penny, how does it feel like to be a celebrity?" The microbiologist shook her head out of amusement, and grabbed her keys to buy the plates. They had been at the park for more than an hour, and Amy had been talking to Penny,  _the entire time._  Amy had even stopped Penny from doing the rehearsal—and somehow, convinced her to take her one day off—and had been asking a hundred questions per second about being a celebrity. Penny barely even had time to respond, before Amy asked another question. It was amusing and at the same time slightly bothersome, as she wanted to talk to Penny, too. But she'd let it go as she could easily call and chat with Penny, now that she finished her raccoon virus research.

"Well, it's really great, but sometimes, everyone recognizing you could be a bit bothersome. One time, I was at Starbucks, and whenever they called me for my order, someone would take it, then take a picture with me." The blonde quietly laughed, recalling the funny memory, "it took half an hour before I got to drink my coffee, and by the time I did, it was cold!" Penny waited for Amy to laugh with her, but was merely met by Amy's smiling face. This was getting more and more awkward with each second that passed, and she hadn't even had a chance to talk to her twins! Heck, she hadn't even seen them since the little fight they had. But, since Amy had convinced her to use the  _single_  free day she had, she guessed that she could just talk to the twins later. It was still pretty early, and she had the day off. Instead, she'll just get to know Sheldon's (not) girlfriend. The joy. "So, uh, Amy, how did you and Sheldon meet?"

What an odd question, Amy mused, but she didn't want to disappoint her new friend by not sharing some juicy information about her life. If they were going to be besties, they should know  _everything_  about each other. She heard Howard yelling something in the distance, but she quickly ignored it. Nothing the engineer said would be more important than befriending the blonde goddess she was currently talking to. "Sheldon and I met in the spring of 2010, when a dating site matched my data with his. Though, it was Howard and Rajesh who had manipulated Sheldon's profile, I still went through with meeting Sheldon. Immediately, we decided that we were at the same level, intellectually, and we used that as basis to decide that we should have a baby together." At the corner of her eye, Amy saw Leonard running and picking up the cooler of water on the grass, frantically mumbling about some sort of fire before scurrying off back to where he came from. Amy found it odd, but she, again, ignored it and sent the blonde on screen a small grinned, and waited for a response.

"A baby?!" Penny blurted out, unsure if she heard the brunette right. "You and Sheldon are planning on having a  _baby_  together?" Wow, this could have been the biggest surprise she had ever gotten since she discovered that she was pregnant. Except, that one was riddled with denial, and this one was just of pure shock and disbelief. She just couldn't quite wrap her mind around that concept, because if it was that easy then she should just probably tell—

"Will you be the godmother?!" Amy excitedly asked, slamming her palms on the surface of the picnic table. "Don't get me wrong, I do not care much about deities or religion, but the idea of a godparent excites me! And even if I only just met you, I strongly believe that you will be a fantastic godmother! One that would give my offspring glass slippers, or a pumpkin carriage. Or turn mice into people!"

Penny wanted to resist frowning at the incredulous brunette, but she just couldn't help it. She was heavily bothered by what Amy said, and it got her thinking. What if she was wrong in her judgement, and Leonard was right about everything? Then she went through so much trouble for... practically nothing. This was definitely confusing her to a great extent, and she wished that she had just up and logged out right from the start. She had prepared herself for a day talking to her twins, and her friends, not gossiping about celebrities with Amy. Don't get her wrong, Amy was delightful—in her own way—but all this talk was exhausting her. She couldn't even ask the questions she wanted to ask because of her own personal reasons. Damn. "Um, Amy, I've known Sheldon for years now, but do you really think that Sheldon is father material? What if he turns your kid into a robot, or something?"

Amy raised an eyebrow at her, her previous hyperactivity dying down. "I must admit, I, myself, am unsure if I will be what they say is a good mother. However, we only agreed to have a child together as between the two of us, our genetic material has the potential of producing the first in the line of intellectually superior benign overlords to guide humanity to a brighter tomorrow. And if we do, it will be via in-vitro fertilization as Sheldon detests physical contact." The brunette paused momentarily, thinking for a moment before resuming. "I have heard many stories of friends volunteering to be a surrogate, and I'm wondering, is your womb available for rental? A future overlord deserves to stay in a womb as wonderfully magical as yours."

The smile Amy was sending her was creeping here off the edge, so did the idea of Sheldon and Amy's kid in her womb. Nope. Not ever. Never, ever, ever,  _ever_. Not even in a million years of being banned from every store and online store in the entire planet. She would rather live under the ground for a year without eating or drinking than even coming close to doing that idea. Not that she was repulsed by Amy (no way) or the thought of Sheldon and Amy having kids; it was specifically the idea of her being the surrogate that crawled under her skin. She was still shuddering at the thought, and she had never wanted to end a conversation as much as she did now. She wasn't opposed to having more kids—even if the pregnancy thing was a bit exhausting—but she already had two, and that was hard enough. Besides, having kids just because they could  _possibly_  be future dictators of the world was such a sucky excuse to have them. Typical Sheldon, that would be the only reason why he would want kids. Disappointing, but it was the truth, and because of that, the truth could wait. "Oh. I thought you and Sheldon were, like, somewhere south of a relationship, or something."

Amy's smile did not falter, and Penny briefly wondered if the brunette was deranged, or slightly going insane. It was happy mixed with excitement, sadness, interest and was generally disturbing. Like a stalker of some sort. "Right now, we're simply close friends and intellectual partners, but I am not opposed to something like that. There is just something about Sheldon that makes my loins burn, and not in the urinary track infection way, if you get the gist?" Eww. "However, I do not believe that we are on that level, yet. He is still a major flight risk, and still is not boyfriend material. But, I personally think that he can change, if he wanted to." Sheldon could change...  _if_ , he wanted to. What an assurance that was. "But enough of me and Sheldon! Let's talk about your gorgeous self! I also heard from my coworkers that you were secretly dating your costar from the movie you're working on right now? Is that true?"

And back to the gossip. At least, they were done with the whole getting her as a surrogate issue. "Uh, no, I'm not really dating anyone right now, but I did go on a couple of dates." The brunette squealed (again) and Penny hesitated slapping her hand over her face. Okay, so she did go on a few dates, but those weren't anything serious! She had so much work to do that dating was no longer a priority for her, contrary to who she used to be. Now, it was just work and her twins, and some minor shopping on the side. She could never give up shopping. Ever. But really, despite what the gossip shows were saying, she really wasn't dating any of her coworkers. She did enjoy the PR, though, it was really doing wonders for her reputation. "I'm glad!" Amy chirped, clapping her hands in delight. "Because I saw the guy you were rumored to be dating, and I really disapprove! You deserve someone better! It is my job as your bestie, to ensure that you end up in the arms of a prized catch!"

"Bestie?" The blonde asked, raising an eyebrow, "I'm your bestie?"

"Yes! I know we only met today, but I feel a connection between the two of us. As if we've known each other since we were kids," this time, Amy's smile was less creepy, and was much more natural than the previous ones she sent her. "But don't tell Bernadette, okay? We've known each other for two years now, but I can't quite call her bestie. So, hush hush!"

"What are the two of you talking about, now?" Bernadette asked as she approached the picnic table, grocery bag in hand. She glanced at the ground under the picnic table and swore that she had placed the cooler there. She decided that she must have been imagining things and sat beside the brunette. Amy—for the first time in a while—tore her gaze from the laptop to look at the tiny blonde. "Nothing! Let's talk about your wedding plans!"

Bernadette found it odd how when the video call first started, Penny seemed to be creeped out by Amy, but when she returned, they seemed to be friends. Which wasn't bad, because it was always nice to be friends with everyone.

As long as Amy stopped asking Penny if her womb was ready for another kid.

* * *

It was the moment of truth; everything was on the line, and if they lost now, they would lose everything.

"Leonard, swerve to the right at ten o' clock, and hit him where it hurts!"

"Dodge him, Raj, dodge him! Then unleash the power within or else I am going to run over your Koothrash with my car!"

"Sheldon! Use your spinning punch when Howard comes closer!"

"Dude! Sheldon's coming! Attack! Attack!"

Sheldon clenched his teeth as he repeatedly hit the button on his controller, waiting for the moment that Howard's (newly painted) blue Wolobot moved towards his red Sheldroid. He and Leonard had already planned this before they even came to the park; they would allow the opposing team to win for awhile so they could study their movements, then once they memorized it, they would go for the offense. It was just like child's play, and once they win, Howard and Raj would have to pay for  _all_  of their dinners. Plus, Leonard was craving for lobster, and he was not opposed to the idea of seafood for dinner. Well, they really didn't have a fixed dinner for Sundays, so he'd allow Leonard just this once to decide on the food. Besides, Red Lobster seemed more than okay as a reward.

"Mock 4, Sheldon, initiate mock 4!" Leonard ordered from beside him as the hot pink Roboppali came in wheeling towards the green Hofstaborg and the Sheldroid. "Watch and learn, gentlemen," said Sheldon who pulled another controller from his pocket. "Let me show you how it's done." He connected the controllers together and flicked a switch on the side, causing the Sheldroid to spin five times, then extended it's body to twice it's size. With a small clunking sound, it twisted back then slammed it's arm against the Roboppali, causing it to flip backwards onto the grass. "Leonard cut in with our tactic 51A!"

There was a whizzing sound followed by the clunking of metal, and Raj screaming. "Howard! Howard! Help me!" The pink robot struggled to tip back on the ground, while the blue robot held it's own against the green robot. "Can't you see how Leonard is backing me up? You can do it on your own!"

Leonard grinned, moving the slider on the controller to boost the Hofstaborg's force. "Sheldon! They're crumbling! Are you ready for the finishing blow?" The red Sheldroid spun again, two compartments opening at it's side before two spikes appeared. Raj and Howard didn't know if they should just forfeit and spare their robots for the possible damage that Sheldon's robot would cause, or run away and spare themselves. The former red harmless robot now looked like it was a spawn of the devil, sent straight from hell with it's bright red color, nasty looking spikes that emerged from it's sides, and the angry look it had on it's monitor. Sheldon had even went out of his way just to put a tiny LCD monitor at the top of his robot, just so it could have facial expressions. Sheldon even treated the robot like it was it's kid or something; he carried it everywhere, polished it, and even bought the best oil out there. It wouldn't be surprising if the robot was as devious as it looked.

"My Sheldroid has been waiting for this moment for an entire week, now!" Sheldon enthusiastically said, his eyes glinting with excitement at the thought of winning. Because what was better than a well earned victory? He didn't stay up late the last two nights just for his Sheldroid to lose to those sorry excuse for robots! Sheldon Cooper was a winner, and he wasn't going to allow a pink robot (that even had hearts on the side) defeat his masterpiece! Which was why he and Leonard carefully devised their offense for today, even if he had momentarily forgotten that today was the day of their anticipated match. They even invented a combo move that took advantage of the Sheldroid's power and the Hofstaborg's stealth, that would lead to an undeniable victory; the Coofstadter Excision. Once Howard and Raj's robots tried to wheel into their direction, their robots would perform a high powered slam that would ensure the opposing robots destruction. And this was  _the_  moment to execute the move, with perfect timing, he cranked the dial under the controller to boost his robot's speed. With one last flick he grabbed the joystick, pushing it forward and accelerating the red robot with full confidence that they would wo _—_

_"Sedoooooooon!"_

And just like that, he lost his momentum; accidentally flicking the stop switch just as the Sheldroid, the Hofstaborg, the Wolobot and the Roboppali crashed into each other at maximum force level. There was a loud clunking noise, followed by a spark, a loud explosion, and the four robots bursting into flames. Short circuit, indeed.

"Oh my god, dude, it's burning! It's burning!"

"Bernie! Bernie! The cooler get the cooler! Bernie? Where'd she go?"

"My Hofstaborg! It's getting eaten by the flames!"

"What are all of you doing? Get the cooler and extinguish the flames!" Sheldon ordered as he watched his robot slowly melting part by part, while getting trapped in a vortex of flames. Howard grabbed his controller from his hands and threw it into the fire along with the others, the flames roaring at the addition of the plastic controllers. Eco enthusiasts would condemn them for this event. He glanced over his shoulder to see Leonard running towards them as he uncapped the lid of the cooler before splashing the contents on the unwanted makeshift bonfire; the fire dying down with a sad sizzle. The four men stared at the partially melted robots, and the light circle of burnt grass surrounding it.

Howard whistled at the sight of the metal oozing down on the grass, they would be so screwed if they were caught. It was a good thing that the grass wasn't too burnt, and was only grazed by the fire. It was the glop of former robots that they'd deal with later, once it cooled and became easier to scrape off without suffering burns. "We are so lucky that there are barely any people at the park today, or else we'd be ban forever." He searched the area for anyone who could have seen the incident and sighed in relief; they were the only ones there. "The coast is clear."

Sheldon fanned his hand in front of his face to get rid of the smell of the smoke, then turned to the two interruptions that caused this mess. "What are the two of you doing here?"

"Wait," Leonard exclaimed as his eyes scanned the perimeter, "why don't we all move away from this place first, before doing anything else? I don't want to get banned from here, this is the nicest park around the neighborhood." The other three scientists wordlessly agreed, and Leonard grabbed both of the twins before moving towards the opposite clearing, near the playground. They stopped once they thought it was far enough from the location of the crime, and hoped that no one saw them walking away from the clearing. Or that they were the ones who caused the small fire.

The theoretical physicist crossed his arms, turning his head down to gaze at the two perpetrators. "Now, that we're all far away from any evidence that we are the culprits—what were the two of you doing away from your appointed area of play?"

Andy's face scrunched up, glancing at his twin then back up at the adult. "Maddie took Andy du-woh-ing!"

Maddie—who still had the said drawing held high above her head—clucked her tongue, and Leonard mentally noted to watch their actions around the twins. They were quick learners at imitating how the adults reacted. "Maddie took cos' Andy took oh-wandge ca-yon! Guh-eeve ca-yon back!"

"Andy not do!" The male toddler argued, his mouth dropping at his twin's claims! He did not take the crayon, because  _he_  was the one looking for the crayon! "Maddie took ca-yon not Andy! Guh-eeve back!"

"No, no, no! Maddie not took! Andy took, so Maddie take du-woh-ing!" Maddie waved the drawing above her head, causing Andy to stomp his foot on the grass out of frustration. He just wanted to finish coloring his Mommy and show it to her! Why did his sister have to be so difficult!

"How do they even manage to have an argument with their limited vocabulary?" Sheldon inquired to the others who also had focused their attentions to the bickering toddlers. The only point they argued with each other was about whatever a ca-yon was. Even he—the most intelligent of them all—had not a single clue as to what they were fighting about. This was not worth losing his custom made robot to flames. He would probably never understand children, or their constant babbling on such idiotic things.

"Kids have their own language, I think," suggested Raj, who was still watching the fighting toddlers. The astrophysicist felt a sense of nostalgia at the fighting pair; it was like watching two people he was very closed to, fighting just like old times. "It's like in Rugrats—even though the adults can't understand them, the kids understand each other. Or like in Family Guy where only Bryan the dog can understand Stewie."

"Are you suggesting that we either find a dog or another young child to interpret what they're saying?" Leonard turned to Raj, who had a thoughtful look on his face. "Because if you are, I don't think it works that way."

Raj shrugged, unsure of what Leonard meant, while Howard sighed. "Hey guys, I think we have to clean our mess up before people start packing in. We still have a kite fighting tournament next week, and I don't want to spend Saturday trying to find a new park that Sheldon approves of." The engineer grabbed Raj's arm, pulling his best friend and lightly shoving him towards the direction of the scene of the crime. "Why don't the two of you go and fix this issue with the twins, while Raj and I clean up the mess?"

Sheldon frowned down at the engineer; he wasn't going to let Howard order him around! But he also wasn't going to clean up the mess that the twins had caused them to make. Stalemate. "No. Leonard and I will take the twins to the playground and try to resolve their problem, while you and Raj clean up the mess." Leonard sent him a pointed look, "and then we will have dinner at Red Lobster. And you will pay."

"Isn't that what I said?" Howard asked in irritation.

"Will you, or won't you?" Leonard hurriedly said, hoping that Sheldon doesn't change his mind about having seafood, and that the other two agree to paying for dinner. He and his roommate never objected to free food. Raj raised his hands up, nodding, "yeah, sure, as long as we get to choose what we're going to eat." Sheldon glanced at Leonard for approval, and gave Raj a stern look. "As long as it is to my liking, then we agree." Leonard and Raj shook hands before he and Howard walked off to the opposite clearing. Wonderful, free food of his choosing. He would have to praise Leonard for the great idea, later.

"—no, Maddie! Andy no take! Maddie take! Guh-eeve back du-woh-ing of Mommy!"

"Maddie no take, Andy! Andy take! Dis Maddie's now!"

"Dat Mommy's!"

"Guh-eeve back ca-yon, Maddie guh-eeve back du-woh-ing!"

Huffing, Sheldon grabbed Andy, and hoisted the toddler up on his arm as Leonard did the same with Maddie. Andy mirrored his frown, and when the sunlight reflected in his eyes, he noticed how the toddler's blue eyes were lighter than before, and could now be perceived as a blue-green color. Yes! He was right with his theory that the toddler's eyes would turn green! It was still blue, but he was happy at the fact that he was partially correct. Andy was turning into a mini Penny with each day that passed, excluding the fact that Andy  _hated_  sleep, unlike his mother who could sleep all day. "Andy no want up," Andy murmured, pouting slightly at him. "It's the only way to end your petty argument. Would you like to go to the playground?"

"Pay-gohd! Maddie want pay-gohd, peas!" The toddler in Leonard's arms, chirped, still tightly clutching Andy's drawing.

"Sedon," Andy murmured as they walked to towards the giant colorful playground in the middle of the park, "Maddie took Andy du-woh-ing of Mommy. Peas, get back."

Sheldon raised an eyebrow at the toddler then at Maddie who was babbling to Leonard about something he couldn't understand. "Maddie took your drawing? Why?" The toddler shrugged slightly tightening his grip on the fabric of Sheldon's The Thing shirt. "Maddie say dat Andy took oh-wandge ca-yon and took Andy du-woh-ing cos' of it. Andy no took ca-yon, poh-mis!" They stopped when Leonard found an empty bench at the side of the playground and placed Maddie down on the grass. "There is no use fighting over such a silly thing," Sheldon said as he walked over to where Maddie stood, and placed her twin down beside her. The twins glared at each other, before crossing their arms and turning the other way.

"You guys really shouldn't fight, you know," Leonard added, taking a seat on the bench. "There's only two of you, and since your mom isn't here, the more reason that you should stick together and stop fighting."

"But oh-wandge ca-yon muh-sing," Maddie cried, raising her hand above her head when Andy tried to snatch the drawing from her. "Sedon get mad at Maddie."

Sheldon sighed; so that was the reason why they were fighting. The orange crayon was missing, and Maddie thought Andy took it, and that they'd get mad if they discovered that the crayon was missing. Well yes, he would get mad since it was impossible to buy a single orange crayon—buying another set would lead to an overstock of every single crayon color except orange—but he couldn't seem to get mad at the toddler. He was somewhat happy that the toddler put his opinion into consideration, but more annoyed as this was such an idiotic reason to fight over. He'd simply buy them the hundred-something set of crayons—ten boxes even, if it would stop the irrelevant fighting. "I will not get mad at you just because of a crayon. If you stop fighting, and make up, I'll buy both of you a new set of crayons of your own."

Maddie looked up at him, gently lowering the drawing. "Sedon no mad if ca-yon muh-sing? It okay?"

"We wouldn't get mad over something as simple as a crayon," Leonard chuckled, reaching his hand out to pat the worried toddler's head. "So, go apologize to Andy and give his drawing back."

Slightly hesitating, Maddie stepped closer to her twin who held a small frown. She didn't like to say sorry, or realizing that she was wrong, but she would do it, anyway. "Andy, dis Andy du-woh-ing," she handed the drawing to her twin brother who silently took it. "Maddie soh-wee foh say-in' dat Andy took ca-yon. Peas, foh-give Maddie." Like how her brother did it before, Maddie clapped her hands in front of her chest and bowed her head down. It was how the girl on the tv did it, and how Andy got Sheldon to forgive him, so she'll do it, too. She had a feeling she looked funny like that, but she had to do it, because she really didn't want to stay mad at her brother for long. Even though her twin was annoying at times, she loved him a lot. And she really didn't enjoy fighting with him, even if seemed like she did.

"Okay, Andy foh-give Maddie," Andy serenely said; he didn't like fights, and especially hated fighting with his twin sister. Even if she  _was_  a big ol' meanie. Besides, she returned his drawing, and had apologized—that was good enough for him. Mommy always said that he shouldn't fight with Maddie, because they were twins and loved each other. He guessed that he did love his sister, even she was a big meanie. Mommy said that that was what brothers did. "Wanna pay at pay-goud?"

Maddie straightened her posture and felt her lips quirking. "Okay!" Andy returned her grin, walking over to Leonard and handing him the drawing before running off with his twin sister towards the playground.

"That may have been the shortest and oddest fight I've ever witnessed," commented Leonard, glancing at Sheldon who was watching the toddlers clamber up on the steps of the playground. He folded Andy's drawing and placed it inside his jacket pocket for safe keeping. "They kind of remind me of you and Penny whenever you fought, before." This comment earned Leonard a glare from Sheldon, who quickly returned his gaze to where the twins where playing. Heaven forbid the twins get injured while playing, or get sick because of one of the five children playing infect them with some unknown incurable disease. "What in the world even led you to that thought?"

"Nothing much. You and Penny used to fight over the silliest things, this kind of reminded me of it." Leonard chuckled, which further intensified the glare Sheldon sent him. "It's even funny to see how much you've grown in the past two years. The Sheldon I know wouldn't even had interacted with children he didn't know, much less help them fix a fight when you can't even forgive me for doing something wrong until  _I_  say sorry. It's like you're all grown up!"

Leonard and his idiotic thoughts; he'd have to deal with that later. "Keep that up and you're going to get a strike." His roommate simply sent him an infuriating smile, and he continued following the twins' every action. They were currently taking turns on the spiral slide, loudly laughing and giggling as they slid down the plastic surface. A great playground would be one modeled after the Death Star, or the Enterprise. Or even a jungle themed one. With monkeys. Playgrounds never interested him, not even the slightest bit. What was so fun about slides and swings? Or standing at the top? Nothing, really. What was fun was dropping various objects from the top of said structure, and calculating the speed of the objects descent by simply listening to the sound it made as it collided with the ground. Now, that was fun! He never found playing via physical activities appealing. It was sweaty, tiring, and nauseating. Plus, playing alone was always laughed at. "Do you find playgrounds fun?"

"I guess it's okay," answered Leonard, his gaze shifting to two men who were walking their way. "My mom never allowed any of us to play on one, but one time I went alone, and swung pretty high. I got up about twelve feet before vomiting at the nearest bush." Sheldon nodded, clearly impressed at his roommate's accomplishment. "I find it both impressive and doubtful at the same time that you managed to get so high all on your ow—" the theoretical physicist suddenly stopped talking when his Vulcan hearing picked up something...  _unpleasant_.

"—but I think Penny's pretty hot."

"Yeah, but,  _come on!_  She has two freaking kids already? What's so hot about that?"

"That's true, but that doesn't change the fact that she's hot. Hey, did she ever say who the dad was?"

"Nah, she said he was all private and crap. I personally think that she doesn't know who the dad is. Cute kids, but who even wants baggage like that? Those kids ruined her."

"I dunno, she's hot but I'm really not ready for kids, you know? 'Specially if the dad is all unknown and stuff. Probably a one night stand, yeah?"

Sheldon's eye twitched and he vividly remembered his previous discussion with Leonard. Back then, he wasn't too interested in the subject of judging Penny just because she had kids, but something about how the two men talked was irking him. He found it utterly disgusting how insensitive these men were. Sure, he still disliked Penny for his own personal reasons, but that didn't mean that he would be okay with people publicly insulting her. Well, Leonard wouldn't be. However, he still found it confusing how knowing that one already has children was off-putting—except if the other person dislikes children. But he really didn't see how the twins ruined his former neighbor's image as he recalled Raj saying that Penny started her show when she already  _had_  the twins. Therefore, they were there before Penny even became famous—why was the topic of her having children still subjective to some people? His bigoted, religious nut mother, maybe, but they were in California! Raj practically gossiped about celebrities who were pregnant and or 'hooked up' every other day! Penny having children shouldn't be an issue, anymore.

"I can't imagine even meeting those kids and pretending to be nice to them, when I hate kids. But the way to get to the mom is through the kids, right?"

"Kinda, but who even wants someone else's kids? I don't! That's why no matter how pretty she is, and even if she is a good actress, all I can see is some slutty girl who had a one night stand and got banged up. Pretty messed up, if you ask me."

"Those kids must be screwed up in a way, cause, like, they probably don't know their dad and everything is a secret and stuff? I think that's how it works. Yeah, like in those shows and dramas on tv."

"I don't care about those kids, really. They can go die or something, for all I care. Maybe, if they disappeared, then,  _just then_ , I might take a liking to Penny. She's hella lot more attractive without those kids."

What was wrong with these people?! Although he disliked the children (at first), he never wished ill things to happen to them! Even he wasn't that bad—the twins were barely two. Yes, he didn't approve of them living with them, and the fact that they could be  _anyone's_  children, but wanting them to 'disappear' was just going too far. He had to admit that in the three weeks that the twins stayed with them, he had already grown a liking to them. He still found them annoying—like when they practically caused the fire earlier—but they were starting to be okay in his book. And he also still did not see how the twins' mere presence affected Penny's worth! He thought it to be one of the most stupid thoughts he had ever heard, and even he was gravely offended by it. Penny was now his acquaintances, and if anyone was to mock her career it would be him, and solely because he still didn't see how she was a 'good' actress, and not because of the fact that she already had offsprings! That would be a completely stupid and uncivilized way of thinking!

"Hey, excuse me!" Sheldon heard Leonard—who had bolted up from the bench and stalked after the men—yell, causing him to go after him. "Hey, I'm talking to the two of you!"

The two men paused in their tracks and turned to see the fuming experimental physicist, who was a couple of inches shorter than them. Sheldon found all three of them to be equally puny. "Yeah, what do you want?" NN1 (Neanderthal number one) asked, and Sheldon recognized the voice to be of the man who kept on insulting Penny. "Are you lost, or something?"

"I just heard you talking bad about Penny and her twins!" Leonard confidently accused, his eyebrows extremely close to each other. Penny was his friend, and if there was a chance that he could defend her, he would! Even if these two idiots could beat him to a sad lifeless pulp. Sheldon would surely call 911 without hesitation, if he gets beaten up. He'd even do first-aid while ranting on how stupid he was for standing up against two beefy idiots. "You shouldn't talk bad about people you don't even know."

NN2 (Neanderthal number two) scoffed, and Sheldon decided that he was the one who had interest in Penny. "What's your point? It's a free country, and we can think whatever we want. You got a problem with it?" NN2 scowled, straightening his back to try and loom over Leonard. It wasn't too intimidating as NN2 thought it would be since he was only an inch or two taller than Leonard, and Sheldon mentally chuckled as he stopped beside his roommate. If he didn't intervene, Leonard would surely need an ambulance called. "Yes, actually, we do have a problem with it." Sheldon replied sternly, successfully looming over the two neanderthals who were about as tall as Raj. He noticed that they were subtly muscular, and mentally prepared himself shall they get beaten up. Regardless, his height seemed to do a number on them, as their tough look faltered when he arrived. "You see, Penny is our friend, and we do not appreciate it when simpletons talk badly about her—" he narrowed his eyes, and made sure to sound as threateningly as possible, "and  _especially_  about her children."

NN1 laughed mockingly while NN2 seemed to be considering the thinly veiled threat. "Or what? You're going to," NN1 glanced down at Sheldon's shirt, "Hulk smash us?" Sheldon raised an eyebrow, briefly glancing down at his mute orange superhero shirt, then back at NN1. "Unfortunately, this is  _The Thing_ , and his catchphrase is, it's clobbering time. So, jokes on you."

Sheldon's next statement made both neanderthals wince—even at the calmness of his tone—and Leonard get new found hope that Sheldon would forgive Penny, one day. "I have a strong abhorrence for fights and arguments, therefore I shall make this quick. If you ever talk badly about Penny and or her children ever again, you will come to regret the day that you even misjudged her just because of the fact that she has children. If you even so much as think about it, I will not hesitate to contact my friends in the chemistry department and the best computer hackers I know to track you down, and make sure that a goop of nuclear waste befalls on you, and does opposite of what it does to people in comic books." NN1 and NN2 visibly gulped, "do I make myself clear?"

The two silent neanderthal buddies eagerly nodded, and Sheldon gave them a menacing smile. "Wonderful. Now, please do go on with your boring, irrelevant, useless lives and do make sure that we never cross paths, again." Barely a second later, the two men scurried off, going on and on about the scary, psychotic man that could possibly kill them.

"Whoa, Sheldon," croaked Leonard who was still in awe after what happened. "How did you manage to do that?"

"Simple, I just channeled my inner super villain, then threw in my best Joker impression." Sheldon repeated the menacing smile, and Leonard silently thanked that the one accident Sheldon needed to turn into a super villain had yet to happen. His roommate just found a new skill he was great at; intimidation via channeling the inner dark side. "You should thank me, had I not interfered and interrupted this almost argument, you may have ended up getting beaten into a pulp. Aren't you glad that I helped you out?"

"Yeah, I guess I am—so, thanks. But really how did you do that? You were all sorts of scary back there!" Leonard gave him a small appreciative smile before walking with his roommate towards the playground. He had to admit that he was glad that Sheldon stood up for Penny as he wouldn't have stood a chance against those two men alone. He was also glad that Sheldon put his dislike for their former neighbor aside for whatever reason and defended her. Penny might have not been the purest person out there, but even she didn't deserve that much flak. Penny might have hurt him in the past, by they were past that, and were now back to being close friends. He really wanted Sheldon and Penny to get back to the odd friendship they used to have for the greater good. He even secretly missed acting as the referee in their constant fights over something trivial. This little move from Sheldon really made him feel like it could be possible. "Oh, and thanks for helping Penny. I would've been beaten up if you didn't come."

Sheldon rolled his eyes as they crossed the playground to the sandbox where the twins were playing. "I didn't do it for Penny, or because I care for her. I did it because I knew that you would get into trouble, and you know how much I detest fighting. And bloodbath."

"Why would there be bloodbath?" Leonard humorously asked. "Did you think that they were going to kill me?"

"Partially, yes. But had they broken your nose, you would have turned into a faucet of blood. I don't want my clothes getting soiled, you know that."

Maddie was busy scrutinizing the sand mountain she and her twin built when her ears picked up Sheldon and Leonard's voices. She glanced over her shoulder and found that she was right. "Uncah Wenad! Sedon!"

Andy gave the sand mountain one last pat before helping his twin stand up and standing up to walk over to the two adults. "Andy and Maddie make mah-tehn! See?" He pointed to the single bump on the sandbox, grinning. "Big mah-tehn!"

"That's really cool," remarked Leonard, causing the twins to smile, "what do you say about going back to the others and having lunch?" The toddlers nodded and Leonard proceeded to pick up Maddie, while Andy walked over to Sheldon.

"Sedon, ho-wd, peas?" Andy stuck his hand out to him, and Sheldon frowned. What was with these children and getting carried-slash-hand holding? It was one or the other and their love for physical contact astounded him. They really were Penny's kids. With a small sigh, he grasped the toddlers hand and continued walking back to the picnic table with him. Who knows what will happen if he doesn't assist the toddler in walking and he stumbles and gets hurt? He did, and he wasn't taking any chances.

Besides, the twins were growing on him—and he could definitely make use of them if he ever plans on making his own Death Star.

* * *

Penny yawned through the screen, glancing at her wristwatch then back at the video call. "Guys, it's getting pretty late, don't you think?"

Amy rested her chin on her palm, grinning at the blonde that she'd been talking to continuously for the past few hours. She loved her new friend, and she was certain that their friendship would last for many years. This was so great! Before she only had Sheldon's friends, and now she had a  _celebrity_  friend! How the girls back in her high school would be so envious of her new bestie! She wasn't just best friends with the head cheerleader, she was now friends with the most popular girl in the city! It really felt great, she had to admit. "It's never too late, bestie! We can go on and on and never run out of topics!"

"When did they become besties?" Howard asked as he dumped the paper plates in a trash bag. "Did we miss something while playing robot wars?"

Raj sighed heavily as he stared at his deformed robot, "it's the magic of friendship, Howard. Like the kind of friendship my Roboppali and I had... before it signed up for a part time job as a ring!"

"Stop whining," Sheldon snarled, removing his gloves and tossing it into the trash bag that Howard held before taking a seat beside Amy. "My robot got equally as destroyed as yours. I say we fuse all of them together to create an even better robot to crush Kripke's." He quickly grabbed the laptop from Amy's hold—ignoring the brunette's protest—then slid it in front of him. "Penny, hello, it seems you and Amy have reached an impasse as she has passed out from pure questionable excitement of talking to you."

"I didn't pass out!"

"Ignore her," Sheldon cut in, staring at Penny on the screen. "I believe you are tired. Yes? Then I suggest you say your farewells to your children!" He lifted the laptop and traveled towards the blanket where the twins sat. "Twins! Your mother is saying goodbye!"

Penny frowned as her view lowered to the twins' eye level. "Hey! I hadn't even said anything, yet! Are you really in that much of a hurry to get me off the screen?"

Sheldon quickly brought the laptop back to his face before any of the twins got to it. "Please do not misunderstand my need to rush things. Amy has been getting corrupted with each second that passed while talking to you, and shall I not intervene, the conversation would drag on for another couple hours." The blonde blinked at Sheldon, realizing that he had a point. Amy barely allowed anyone—even her kids—to talk to her, and she doubted that the brunette would allow her to disconnect the call. "I get it. You don't want me corrupting your friend—but you don't have to be so mean about it."

"I'm never mean, Penny. You know that," he replied, sounding as though he was tired of explaining it to her. There was a certain kind of sincerity in the tone of his voice, and Penny wondered why he didn't sound as stern and stoic as he did before. Did he finally stopped hating her? Yeah, right. She strongly doubted that Sheldon would just wake up one day and stop disliking her. It didn't matter much to her, as long as he treated her kids kindly. Leonard said earlier that Sheldon even managed to get her twins to stop fighting, again! And that Sheldon really was starting to like her kids. Well good, cause that was the important thing here. She and Sheldon could try to be friends in a different day. "So, go and say goodnight before Amy runs over here and retrieves the laptop."

Andy scrambled to get on his feet as Sheldon couched down, holding the laptop towards them. "Mommy! Wook! Andy du-woh Mommy!" He held the drawing up in front of the screen and Penny wondered why her drawing (she guessed that she was the tall one with long yellow hair that went all over the place) was the only one without skin color. "That's looks wonderful, Andy! And you even added fingers!"

Maddie finished coloring the last part of her drawing, then stood and presented her artwork to the laptop. "Wook, Mommy! Maddie du-woh da det stah!" She tapped her finger on three yellow blob like things, then one brown one. "Dat Mommy, and Andy and Maddie and Sedon on da det stah!" Penny strongly resisted the urge to do a face-palm. What were Sheldon and Leonard even teaching her kids? Barely two years old and yet her daughter already knew what a Death Star was. She wasn't sure if she should be proud, or sad. "Sheldon! Why does Maddie know what a Death Star is?"

"Because, why not?" Sheldon answered, pride dripping from the tone of his voice. "You should be proud of your child's creativity and obvious interest for such wonderful works such as the Star Wars franchise. I am like the Obi Wan to your children, or Yoda, as I am full of wisdom and the person who guides them to a better tomorrow. Before crossing the dark side, of course."

"More like Darth Vader," Penny mumbled as Sheldon turned the laptop back to her twins. "But sure, yeah thanks for teaching them stuff. Whatever will we do without the great Sheldon Cooper?" Sheldon sensed the sarcasm in her tone and frowned, "it's  _Doctor_  Sheldon Cooper, and please bear in mind that I am finally getting the hang of sarcasm."

Bernadette was walking back towards the picnic table when she decided to stop by the blanket where the twins, Sheldon and Penny were. Right as she stopped, she felt something hard under her shoe and crouched down to see what it was.

It was an orange crayon.

"Twins," she called, picking up the crayon and wiping it on the hem of her skirt. "Were you looking for this?" Maddie tore her gaze away from her laptop, and felt her eyes widen. "Da ca-yon!" She exclaimed, grabbing her twins wrist and dragging him to where Bernadette was. "Ha! Maddie wong! Andy no took ca-yon!" Bernadette smiled softly at the twins who were fighting over the crayon. She had heard about the little fight from Leonard, and wondered herself where the crayon went. Now that she found it, she had a theory that the crayon rolled off of the blanket and into the grass. Which was probably why neither of the twins saw it.

"Where'd the twins go?" Penny asked, her eyes scanning the screen and seeing nothing but the blanket.

Sheldon turned the laptop to the direction where Bernadette and the twins were. "They seem to have found the missing the orange crayon that they were fighting over. I guess I no longer have to buy them a new box of crayons."

"Why would you even buy them another box of crayons? Can't you just buy a single orange crayon?"

"Penny, don't be silly," Sheldon shook his head at the blonde's silliness, "buying a single crayon would be impossible. Although, seeing that the infamous crayon rolled off to the grass, I might need to buy a new set of crayons as it is most definitely dirty. But that would lead to an over supply of every color except orange... what a conundrum."

The blonde smiled at the physicist who was still rambling on about crayons. If he was the Sheldon she knew, he wouldn't have cared. And seeing him getting slightly worked about it made her feel an odd sense of content. Maybe, times were changing, and she had really misjudged Sheldon. Leonard might have been right, after all. She found it so endearing that Sheldon even cared about the crayon that she didn't even noticed that Sheldon was finally talking to her again.

* * *

 **Future;**  thirteen years later.

* * *

Andy swung the door open and found the biggest shock of his life. His twin sister's room was an actual pig sty! And he swore that he saw movement underneath the pile of dirty clothes at the corner of his sister's room.

"How do you even live here?" He asked incredulously to her sister who was frowning. His sister's organization skills was one of the worst he had ever seen—which was shocking as Maddie excelled in most things. His twin was even great at sports; tennis, soccer, swimming, baseball—her twin was very athletic, while he... well, he was kind of okay with basketball. Which was a total lie, because they only recruited him for his height. But he did okay with football, he understood everything there was to understand about it—but he strongly feared that he'd get hurt, which was why he only sat with the coach to help plan their plays. He was actually really good at doing that. Maddie, on the other hand, was so athletic that a lot of people were shocked that outside sports, his twin was studious and introverted. Unlike him, who wasn't introverted but was only  _kind of_  friendly. Kind of. "Did that pile just move?! I think it moved!"

"That's probably just Bowser jr. playing underneath the mess." Andy continued to stare at her, wondering why her sister was so calm about the idea of their dog playing underneath these garbage. Their dog might even lose oxygen because of it! His sister's (dis) organizational skills were clearly affecting her—not as smart as his—brain. Maddie turned to him before plowing through the piles of clothes on the floor. "It only got this dirty because I was looking for Pooh!" She placed her foot underneath one pile, then brought it back and kicked the clothes into the hamper near her desk. A perfect shot—his twin's skills at sports was really something. Too bad she sucked at cleaning. "So, why did you even bring me here? If it was here, I would've seen it already! And I have a match in four hours—make it quick."

"Maybe, if you learned to clean and fix your things, you might see it." His twins' room was horrifying, and he briefly wondered how they were even siblings. His room was always neat and clean, and everything that could be alphabetically organized was correctly stored. Even his clothes was color coded in his closet—which was why their mom even asked him to fix hers, which was as messy as his sister's. "Wait, give me a moment." Andy furrowed his eyebrows as he scanned the mess; looking for any indicator that the doll was there. But it was nearly next to impossible as his twin sister was living in a jungle!

Ten minutes of pure silence and concentration later, he saw something brown-ish peeking out of the pile of clothes. He marched towards and it quickly pried it out, revealing the now brown Winnie the Pooh doll. Eww. The doll seriously needed a hot scalding bath—and so did his hands, after touching that pile of pure disgust. "Why did this turn brown? He's supposed to be yellow!"

Maddie scurried to him, grabbing the doll and holding it tightly against her chest. "It's a tan! Pooh got a tan! Got a problem with that?"

"No, I don't," Andy sighed, "now that I've proved that you have literally zero organizational skills, will you please leave me be? I really want to finish my book."

"I guess," Maddie said, scanning around her room. Her twin was right—her room was a mess, but she had seen worse. "Wait, could you help me clean up my room? Please?"

Andy stared at his twin sister who was sending him a pleading look. His sister was a gigantic jerk, and often got mad at him over the littlest things. She was also a know-it-all when it came to school, and was a sore loser when he got a higher grade than her. Plus, she was annoying seventy percent of the time. But he  _was_  her last hope, unless she wanted to get reprimanded for the mess. He shrugged, let it never be said that he ignored the cries of the greater evil in trying to fix her life. He was such a good brother. "Yeah, sure. Why not?"

Fifteen years of living together had prepared him for dealing with his sister's cons. That, and the fact that he loved his twin sister, even if she was incredibly annoying most of the time.


	6. Cover Curiousity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A magazine article about Penny and the twins causes Sheldon's curiosity for the truth to grow.

Stuart looked up from the stack of comic books that had just been delivered as Raj and the others walked inside the store. What made him completely stop from counting the comic books was the sight of Sheldon carrying a little girl, and holding the hand of another similar looking toddler. "Hey guys, how's it going? I thought you guys weren't going to come today. This is the first time you've ever been late for more than twenty minutes."

"Hey, Stuart," greeted Raj with a smile, "yeah, sorry we're a bit late. We had to stop by the mall to get some things."

Sheldon snorted as he placed the toddler on top of the counter, then placed a plastic bag beside her. "We had to buy sippy cups that were up to these children's requirements." He bent down, lifting the other toddler and sat him beside the female toddler. "It was a now or never situation. Now, enough of this banal chit chat. Do you have our comic books?"

Stuart wordlessly nodded, turning and taking the comic books he saved for his friends. "Yeah, here they are," he handed it to Sheldon, who proceeded to give it to the other three men before placing the comic books in his messenger bag. "So, uh, who are the kids?" He gestured to the two toddlers sitting quietly on top of the counter that was apparently sturdier than it looked. Two blonde heads both turned to face him and he found them looking very... familiar. It was like he'd seen both of them before, but he wasn't sure where or who they looked like. But, he had to admit, they were very cute toddlers that were looking very intimidating with the way they were scrutinizing him.

Leonard walked over to them, "uh, that's Andy and Maddie. They're Penny's kids."

"Penny?" Stuart repeated, raising his eyebrows at the tiny scientist. "Blonde, beautiful, once went out with a date with me then with with Leonard and is now one of the most talked about celebrities right now?" The four men all nodded—each doing an activity of their own—and Stuart returned to staring at the toddlers. So, that's why the seemed so familiar! He had spent a lot of (depressing) days drawing and perfecting the image of Penny, and so he knew every single facial feature that the blonde had. He wasn't obsessed, but he could draw Penny's face completely by memory. The male one—who was playing with a Wolverine action figure that was on the counter—looked a lot like Penny. His nose was kind of the same, he had the same shape of her face, the same ears; even his eyes (which was currently a light blue-ish green) were the same! The only thing the kid, who was already Penny's carbon copy, had that wasn't from his mom, was his smile. His smile was familiar, but not Penny-familiar. Even the happy glint he had while playing with the toy was not from Penny, but he swore that he had seen it before.

The female one—who was scrutinizing a deck of cards—looked a lot like Penny, as well. But she also didn't look like Penny, at the same time. Which Stuart found confusing, as how could someone possibly look and not look like someone? The toddler didn't have the same eyes, or the same nose, or the same shape of her face—but she did have the same smile as Penny's. She greatly resembled her mother, but not as much as the other toddler did. The kid must look more like their dad, than Penny, and Stuart was sure that the kid would grow up to be as beautiful as her mother. But still, she really looked like Penny, and looking at one of his sketches of her, she was also a mini Penny. Especially when the toddler frowned—it reminded him so much of Penny when she was sad. Not that he saw her sad often, he just knew what she looked like when she didn't like something, and the kid was definitely channeling her right now.

"So, you're going back to work?" Stuart heard Howard ask Sheldon, and he decided to return to doing his daily inventory check.

Sheldon sullenly nodded, glancing at the twins to see what they were up to. "Yes, as I have consumed all two weeks of my remaining vacation time, I can now return to work without anyone threatening to ban me into another vacation. Speaking of which," he turned, abandoning the box of comic books and making his way back to the counter. "Stuart, did you get me the things I asked for?"

The comic book owner looked around, and spotted the aforementioned things. "Uh, yeah. When you first asked me to get these, I wondered what it was for," he bent down, taking the newly delivered stack of magazines and placing it on top of the counter before reaching for the plastic bag. "But now that I see who they're for, I think I understand."

Maddie tilted her head to the side when the sad looking man placed a stack of thin books beside her. Curious, she scooted over to it and found herself startled at what she saw—it was Mommy, her and Andy! On the book thing! She turned back to her twin, repeatedly smacking his arm to get his attention. "Andy! Andy! Wook!" She pointed to the stack, and Andy moved from the edge of the counter to the stack. "Dat Andy, Maddie and Mommy! Yes?"

Sheldon frowned as the twins moved from their places and placed the bag filled with toddler sized superhero shirts on the counter. "What are you two going on about?" The toddlers both pushed the stack of magazines towards him, and he raised an eyebrow. It was one of those magazines that Penny and Raj subscribed to that featured a celebrity per issue. Penny's apartment used to be filled with subscriptions of the magazine, and when he took a gander at it, he found it to be irrelevant. He never understood why Penny chose paying for the subscription rather than buying her own food. What got his attention, however, (and probably the twins', as well) was the cover of the magazine. It was Penny, wearing a bright red dress, smiling widely at the camera as she held up a trophy in front of a white background. On both sides of her, were two stools; on one stool was Andy wearing a grey suit while holding a bonded stack of papers, with a curious expression on his face and on the other stool was Maddie, wearing a white dress, who was throwing her own bonded stack of papers in the air with a smile on her face. In front of the three of them were the words 'Superstar Actress By Day, Super Mom For Life' in bright blue letters.

He found the front cover to be quite enthralling—he had to buy it.

"Stuart," he started, finally tearing his gaze from the interesting magazine cover. "Since when did you start selling these types of magazines?"

"Well, some of the customers wanted to buy other magazines like Playboy, and Vogue, so I ordered various magazines." Sheldon took another glance at the magazine cover, then back at the twins; an unknown feeling creeping up on him. Without a second thought, he grabbed his wallet and handed Stuart the money for his comic books, the superhero shirts, and the magazine. Stuart took one of the magazines and handed it to him, a small look of curiosity on the artist's face. "I just realized that the twins who are currently sitting on my counter are the twins in that cover," Sheldon took the magazine, and Stuart handed his phone to him, "they're technically celebrities, so can you take a picture of the three of us?"

Leonard took the camera from the unwilling physicist and lifted it up, "I'll take the picture. Twins, Stuart wants to take a picture with you!"

Andy smiled—he liked taking pictures! Whenever Penny brought them along to the set, various people would give them candy, then take pictures with them. Maddie didn't like pictures too much, but if Penny told her to smile, she would smile. They were also accustomed to getting photographed; a normal day out usually meant paparazzi trying to take a picture of Penny. They also had been featured in several magazines with their mother, the one Sheldon just bought being one of them. "Maddie, take pic-cha!"

Maddie gave him a small frown before Stuart placed his head in between the two of them, and she smiled. She didn't like pictures as much as her brother did, but sometimes she enjoyed the attention. Though, there were times when the three of them would go out for ice cream and a lot of adults would try to talk to them, and take pictures. She hated that—but her mother had said that it was part of her job, so they had to just smile and go along with it. But it could really get annoying at times.

"Thanks!" Stuart said once Leonard handed him the camera back. "I can't believe I got a picture with celebrities! Well, a celebrity's kids, but it counts, right?"

Sheldon ignored the comic book store owner who was talking with Leonard and walked over to the twins. "Here. Don't rip it up, or chew it or eat it," he passed the magazine to Andy who immediately stared at the cover. It must have been astonishing for the children to see themselves on something such as a magazine. "You might choke if you do any of those actions, and your mother will not be happy if that happens." The toddlers grinned up at him in appreciation before returning to staring at the published photo of them and their mother.

Knowing that they were going to ignore him, he moved on to the plastic bag Stuart handed him and opened it to see the contents. He had previously asked Stuart to get him an array of superhero shirts in the twins' sizes as all of the clothes at the mall were completely lacking. It was either Spiderman, Superman or Batman, there was absolutely no variety, and barely any shirts for Maddie. Who would even want a pajama set with Tinkerbell on it? Most definitely not any child temporarily living under his roof. He'd allow Winnie the Pooh, the Toy Story cast, and every other Disney character (except Goofy) but there was a fine line between Tinkerbell and Piglet who could either be a boy or a girl. Besides, Raj already did his own shopping, and now Maddie had enough Disney Princesses clothes to last her a lifetime. As he was now getting sick of Disney characters, he finally brought it to himself to spread light on these sheltered toddlers' lives.

He got them superhero shirts!

And that wasn't all—he even got them Star Wars, Star Trek, and Lord of the Rings themed clothing! If he was not the epitome of generosity, then he didn't know who was.

Sheldon looked at the list of designs for both Andy and Maddie. There were; The Flash, Superman, Batman, Green Lantern, Nightcrawler, Justice League, Teen Titans, Avengers, separate members of the Avengers, X-Men, separate members of the X-Men, Spiderman, Deadpool, and various other superheroes. Then he even took the liberty of getting them  _matching_ shirts! He had matching Fantastic Four Johnny and Sue Storm shirts, Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch, Batman and Catwoman, Luke and Leia, R2D2 and C3P0, Frodo and Sam, Spock and Kirk and other favorite duos of his. He briefly debated on getting them Game of Thrones shirts, but he didn't want the twins to end up like Cersei and Jaime—or any of the Targaryen members. The four of them were even brainstorming on what costumes they could get the twins, and what they could wear for Halloween, if they were to still be lodging with them by then. So far, it was either the Storm siblings, Luke and Leia, or Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch, as they wanted to stick with the siblings theme. Howard suggested Cersei and Jaime, and that effectively killed their excitement at dressing the twins up. If there was something Sheldon desperately wanted the twins to do, it was to  _never_  even try and act like those two. Ever.

"Dat foh Andy and Maddie?" Maddie asked, peering down at the giant bag filled with clothes.

"Yes. I got you new shirts, see?" Sheldon pulled out a pastel green shirt that had the Green Lantern's insignia on it. "This is for you. Now, you can stop wearing those hideous dresses that your mother packed." Andy lifted his face from the cover of the magazine, and scowled at the shirt. "Das Andy get, too?" A green shirt was brought out, and the toddler smiled in content. Children and presents—he'd never really understand.

"Hey, Sheldon we have everything we need," Howard called as he lifted the plastic bag filled with comic books. "Do you have everything you need? We'll be late for HALO night, and we all know that you wouldn't like that."

Sheldon stuffed the shirts back in the plastic bag, handing it to Leonard before taking the magazine from Andy's hands and placing it in his messenger bag. Once he had everything in place, he lifted Andy and placed him on the ground, then proceeded to carry Maddie. He had certainly gotten used to carrying the toddler everywhere. Maddie seemed to have a preference of getting him to carry her, and after the fourteenth protest, he finally agreed to her demands. Besides, it could be considered as exercise, and one that wasn't too strenuous or tiring like playing sports. "You are in correct in thinking that, and yes, I am done."

Stuart watched the entire scene closely, and even after the four friends (and two toddlers) left, he found himself oddly curious with what just happened. It wasn't too noticeable, but the unfamiliar look that the male toddler had, was slightly similar to the expression Sheldon had as Raj started a debate about superheroes. It wasn't completely the same, but the toddler—Andy, he thinks his name is—and Sheldon's frown had the same dip, and the same intimidating effect to it... was is possible that...?

But thinking about facial expressions wasn't his priority, right now. It was doing inventory on all of the magazines and books that were in his store. How fun.

* * *

Red. Yellow. Green. Those were the excruciatingly bright colors that were mocking him as he did his work. They were inanimate—motionless, yet they had such an odd effect on him. They made him want to scream, get angry, and jump out of the window behind him. Exaggerating, he was not, they were as provoking as a duel. The colors hadn't even been in the room for long, just an hour or two, yet he wanted to grab them, throw them out the window, and make sure that it lands on Kripke's car. Or Winkle's. Or Howard's.

Sheldon was that mad at the stupid colorful playpen that sat on the right side of his office, where the twins were currently playing at.

It was the only logical answer to a problem that the four of them pondered for days on end. With his return to work, the twins had no one to look after them, and so they decided to temporarily bring them to work. The big problem was that, Howard and Leonard  _did not_  have offices of their own, and were sharing the room with their fellow Oompa Loompas. Raj's office was too small to accommodate the twins and their things, with Raj's unnecessary life size cutouts of Jon Snow, Daenerys and Robb Stark that he desperately wanted to destroy. Each time he went there, the cutouts seemed to want to skin him alive, and he didn't like that. Therefore, the only place the twins could stay at, was his office. It was déjà vu, and he mentally noted to add 'university daycare' to add to the suggestion box outside Siebert's office. And that they scout for a satisfactory daycare that was easily accessible.

The only good thing about bringing the toddlers to work was that all four of them would take care of the twins. He got the easiest task—housing them, and he didn't care much about what the others were supposed to do.

"Coopah, we sewiouswy need to talk about the scheduwe fow ouw fusion weactow." Sheldon looked up—briefly wondering if Andy's voice suddenly matured—and saw Kripke standing in front of his door, staring at the twins.

"Awe those toddwews?" Kripke slightly bent down to take a closer look at the blonde toddlers who were completely ignoring him. The first toddler, who was wearing a light green shirt with Deadpool on it, looked like a girl, but the haircut told him otherwise. The second toddler was definitely a girl, and was wearing a pastel green shirt with She-Hulk and the Hulk on it. Then he glanced at Sheldon, who was wearing a disgustingly bright yellow shirt with random shapes and figures and Professor X on it. They looked like they were wearing matching father-children outfits. "When the heck did you have kids?"

"Kripke," Sheldon spoke up, glancing at his rival, "we have gone over this many times before. I get to use the weac— _reactor_  whenever I want, and you can only use it when I say you can use it." Kripke was still standing there, staring at the twins. "If you are still unable to comprehend that, then I shall send you an email explaining it in your obvious level of intellectual capacity. Now, please leave my office." Kripke raised an eyebrow at him, then continued staring at the twins who were busy building blocks. They looked kind of familiar, but he couldn't say where he had seen him before. "So, who awe these kids?"

"They are Andy, and Maddie." The theoretical physicist said with a bored tone, flipping the page of the reference book he was reading. "They're Penny's kids, not mine."

"Woxanne's? Woxanne that use to wive acwoss youw apawtment? The one who's weally famous wight now, and is wumowed to powtway Bwack Canawy in the Gween Awwow movie?"

"I'm not sure how I understood that, but yes, Penny the actress, and my former neighbor." Sheldon lifted his gaze and found Kripke still standing in front of the playpen. "If you're done, you may leave my office. The door's right there." Kripke held up a hand to him, fully crouching down and getting the twins' attentions. The two blonde toddlers both paused, their heads slowly turning to face the plasma physicist who was curiously staring at them.

Andy blinked at the strange man, his hand still placed on the blue colored block that he had placed on the tower of blocks that he and his twin was building. He gently added it at the top, then turned his head to meet the stranger's gaze. "Hi." Maddie's head snapped to face his, a very affronted look on her face as she pushed him backwards. "Andy," Maddie whispered loudly, "dat stuh-nger! No talk to stuhn-nger, Uncah Wenad say."

"His name is Barry Kripke," the theoretical physicist informed, "he works here at the university. And he calls your mother 'Woxanne."

"I caww hew  _Woxanne_ , not Woxanne," Kripke hissed before turning back to the twins. "You know, I vowunteewed to babysit fow Mrs. Davis, and I'd wike some expewience."

"Why did you volunteer for Mrs. Davis?"

"Because, she's pawt of the tenuwe committee, and a spot just opened, and I'm getting it." Sheldon nodded; he knew about the new tenure position that opened up, and that he was one of the people in the shortlist along with Raj and Leonard. He and Mrs. Davis had an odd relationship, but he considered her as his friend after she had helped him with a problem Wolowitz had with one of his potential assistants. Plus, Mrs. Davis was the one who recommended him for tenure, and that automatically made her his friend. There was no doubt about it that he'd get the tenure, but he'd allow Kripke, Raj and Leonard to keep on dreaming. "So, can I pwactice with these kids ow what?"

Sheldon sighed, even if he said no, he knew that Kripke wouldn't leave. "As long as you don't do anything to contaminate their minds into supporting your field of science, then go ahead." He flipped another page of his book, his eyes darting to Kripke, "but you can only interact with them here."

"Yeah, suwe, suwe," Kripke answered, and Sheldon returned to working as Kripke opened up the playpen. "So, chiwdwen! What is it that you wike to do?"

Andy looked at his sister for approval before answering the man's question. "Andy and Maddie wike to pay."

"Pay?"

" _Pway_ ," Maddie corrected, returning to her tower of blocks. "Fun pway! And cowowing, too."

"Kip-keh want pay, too?" Andy asked, holding out a bucket filled with blocks. Barry furrowed his eyebrows before shrugging. "Yeah, suwe, why not." The male toddler grinned, patting the carpeted ground for him to sit on. When they first arrived at the room, Sheldon had told them not to sit on the floor until he was done 'vacuuming' the carpet. After the cleaning session, Sheldon told them that they were now allowed to sit and play on the floor. "Maddie, Kip-keh pay, too!"

Kripke sat crossed leg in front of them, dumping the blocks on the floor. All he needed to do was play with them—he'd remember that when he actually babysits those kids. He didn't want to, but drastic times call for drastic measures—and with that tenured position, it would be easier to get the equipment he needs for his research. "By the way, my name is Kwipke, not Kip-keh." The male toddler turned to him, looking curious while the female continued to ignore him. The female one sure had an attitude problem, but at least the male one was willing to fix his mistakes. "It's  _Kwipke_."

"Kip-keh."

" _Kwipke_."

"Kip-keh."

"Kuh-wip-ke."

"Kup-keh."

"Kuh."

"Kuh."

"Wip."

"Wip."

"Keh."

"Ke."

"Kwipke."

"Kip-uh-keh!"

Well that was a complete waste of time, Kripke thought as the toddler continued on enthusiastically chanting  _Kip-uh-keh_  with much emphasis on the uh. He felt somewhat stupid talking to a baby, but he would rather look stupid, than everyone making fun of him getting called Kip-keh. So, Kip-uh-keh, it was. It was better than being called Kwipke by some of the other scientists—this was a toddler, and toddlers mispronounced things all the time. But maybe he could do better with the female twin, since she seemed a bit more better with articulation. With a smile that he saved for kids, he turned to the female toddler who was adding a triangle block up to her tower. "Do you know my name?"

Maddie gazed at her tower then removed the triangle block, "Kip-key."

Wrong. "Actuawwy, it's  _Kuh-wip_ —"

The female toddler stilled, her head slowly turning to meet him, and Kripke met a pair of clear blue eyes that were so intimidating, that he momentarily forgot he was staring at a toddler. Her gaze was so intense, that Kripke felt himself wince as the kid held the glare. How could a toddler look so menacing—while being a toddler?! And why was the glare so familiar, as if he'd seen it time and time before? He knew where he had seen it before, but he just couldn't put his finger on it. Like those words that suddenly disappear from your mind, right when you need them. "Uh, yeah, I guess Kip-key is cwose enough." The female toddler's glare dropped, and changed into a look of pure disinterest. "So, what awe you making? Is that a towew?"

Maddie nodded, replacing the green arc shaped block for a blue one. "Big towah, wike da em-piwe staht buh-ding." Andy tilted his head to inspect the tower, taking a triangle block and placing it on top of the arc. "Andy want big, big, big towah! A scawy towah!"

Kripke started building his own tower, he found it amusing how the toddlers considered tall towers as scary. "I've been to the Empire State Building, you know. It was weawwy taww and even I thought that I was gonna faww!"

"Kip-uh-keh not get scawed? Big towahs scawy!" Andy commented, staring at the stranger in awe. His mother had once showed him a picture of the Empire State Building, and they had once passed by it when they were in New York. He and his sister wanted to go inside, but they had to hurry up and get to where Penny had to be. So, he and his sister often built the building and pretended as if they had been to it. "It wasn't scawy at aww. Taww buiwdings awen't scawy, it's the feaw of fawwing that's scawy. Fawwing at the height would compwetewy obwitewate and cwush anyone!"

Maddie gasped, looking at the stranger then back at the tower she and her twin were making. "Dat big? Dis towah big, too?"

"I think you should make it biggew, tawwew!" Kripke searched the blocks that the male twin gave him, and added blocks to the tower. "Thewe! Just wike that! I bet that it's taww enough to kiww an ant."

"But ant nice!" Maddie exclaimed in shock, placing a hand over her mouth as Andy shook his head. "Ant nice, dat wat Mommy say! No make bye bye!"

"I'm not sewiouswy going to kiww an ant! Unwess of couwse, they bite me! Then I'd squish them into yestewday!" Kripke made a punching movement, and laughed. "Have you evew been bit by an ant befowe?"

Andy hummed in thought, "Andy got ouch when Andy, Mommy and Maddie eat at picnic." He pointed to a spot on his knee, "dat got ouch! Andy cwy, too!"

Sheldon furrowed his eyebrows at the scene in front of him. It had gone on too long, and he had finally had enough. He barely understood a word that the twins were saying on a daily basis, yet there Kripke was, engaging in a full fledged conversation with the twins. Their conversation was filled with mispronounced words and the misuse of the letter W. He already felt his head throbbing due to the conversation, and he wasn't even listening to them! He only heard snippets of it during the mental pauses he made while flipping a page. He had never experienced such a horribly spoken conversation that he had even started to doubt the use of L and Rs in a few words—like hemorrhage, because one of the veins in his body was close to doing that. He had never had gone through something so mentally painful that he had to stop this madness before his head explodes. "What in the world are you even talking about?!"

"Weawwy taww skyscwapews and buiwdings."

"Scawy towahs!"

"Buh-dings."

It was torture to his ears—when he has his own children, he was going to make sure that they would have perfect articulation, enunciation, diction and everything that these three humans were lacking. He'll give them names that were riddled with Ls and Rs; like Lalonde and Regenerate, so that they'd get used to saying their names properly. Andy couldn't even pronounce Andrew right, and it always came out as  _Andoo_. He'd have to do something about that, or else he'd fail as a temporary de-facto guardian.

"Kripke, how are you even keeping up with that conversation?" Sheldon switched his attention to the door where Leonard stood, looking as confused as ever. "Even I didn't understand a word!"

"Leonard, hello," the experimental physicist raised an eyebrow at his roommate. He had been in the office for a while now, and had heard enough to make him scream. "Hey, Sheldon. Kripke, what are you even doing with the twins?"

Kripke looked up at him, returning the blocks into the bucket. "I'm pwaying with them cause I'm going to schmooze Mrs. Davis into getting me that tenuwed position by babysitting hew chiwdwen, and I'm using these toddwews as pwactice." He checked his wristwatch before proceeding to stand up, "boy, time does fwy by when you'we having fun! I have to go to use the gwid computew befowe someone manages to get my scheduwe."

"Kip-uh-keh!" Andy called, making Kripke turn around, "pay again?"

"Yeah, of couwse!" The twins grinned happily up at their new friend. "Thanks fow the fun time spwouts! Untiw next time." He waved at the toddlers seated on the floor before exiting the office, completely forgetting about the schedule he needed to discuss with Sheldon.

Leonard and Sheldon stared at the empty doorway, still unable to comprehend what had just happened. "Is it just me, or did they have fun with Kripke, just like that?" Sheldon bitterly snarled, the memory of the twins insulting him still fresh in his mind.

"I think it's cause they understand each other," commented Leonard, "anyway, I came here to get the twins. I was thinking of showing them the new experiments I've been conducting, then I'd bring them to the engineering room so that Howard could have some time with them."

"Of course! My head has been throbbing ever since my senses took notice of that torturous cacophony." Sheldon pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to lessen the headache he was currently having. "It's like getting your skull drilled without undergoing anesthesia." Leonard walked over to the playpen, lifting Maddie and helping Andy stand up. "I wish I could disagree with you, but I myself am having a headache."

Andy toddled over to Sheldon's desk, placing his hands on the edge and grinning at the physicist. "Sedon! Kip-uh-keh pay again, peas?"

Maddie nodded from Leonard's arms, "Kip-key fun! Kip-key talk funny!"

"Yes, Kripke  _does_  talk funny, huh?" Leonard chuckled, adjusting Maddie before grabbing Andy's hand. "Now, come on. We're gonna let Sheldon have some time to clear his head while we go and bother Howard. How does that sound?"

"Okay!" Maddie agreed for the both of them, waving at Sheldon as they left the room.

Sheldon took a deep breath as Leonard closed his door, he could finally get some work done.

* * *

Howard was in the middle of adjusting the M.O.N.T.E. 2.0 when Leonard, Raj and the twins walked in.

"New obot?" Maddie asked as Leonard placed her on a stool, while Andy chose to stand next to the table that reached just under his chin. "Andy and Maddie pay obot, too?"

Raj grabbed the toys that Howard built for the twins and handed it to them. "No,  _these_  toys are for you two, as this robot isn't for playing—it's for fighting! M.O.N.T.E 2.0 is way more advance than any of our personalized robots combined, and has a buzz saw!" The three men high fived at the sight of the enhanced saw that sat atop the robot skeleton. This time, their killer robot was going to be better than ever, and would easily destroy Kripke's stupid robot without even a bat of an eye. They had sacrificed the Sheldroid, Hofstaborg, Roboppali and Wolobot to create this metal monster, and they were going to make sure that it was the best. "What are you currently working on?"

"I'm cutting the edges before adding on the hidden compartments for the mini flamethrower." Howard gestured to the laser on the table then to the cut on the surface of the metal. "Then I'm going to make another compartment here for the extendable sucker punch."

"The one that the Sheldroid had?" Leonard moved towards the second table where the metal compartments were elevated. "Sheldon's going to kill you for stealing the idea." Raj and Howard moved to the second table where the compartments that Howard were building were. "Hey, it's twenty-five percent his robot, too! So, he won't mind me using his idea. Besides, if it's for the greater good, why get mad?"

Raj lifted the compartment that had three revolvable circle compartments inside. "And what is this for?" He placed a finger on the metal ring that bounded the circles, flicking his finger and making it spin. "It's for the three hundred ultra sharp spikes that will be bunched and launched together when wanted—it's sharp enough to kill!" Howard proudly explained, grabbing the bunched up needles, "don't even ask how I got these, or else you'll get deported back to India." He placed the needles back on the table then lifted the sword looking apparatus on the other side of the table. "And this is another secret that will launch from M.O.N.T.E. 2.0's chest! What do you guys think of multiple flamethrowers?"

"Sounds great!" Leonard grinned, fumbling with the compartment that had the label 'flamethrowers' on it. "Oh, which reminds me, I have to ask you guys' opinion on something."

"What is it? Girl trouble? Wanna sue a restaurant for serving you dairy filled food when you specifically said non-dairy?" Howard guessed as he adjusted the flamethrowers compartment, adding a second tube where they could place gasoline. "No, it's about Sheldon."

"Yeah, what about him? Just spit it out."

"How is his progress doing? Is there even any progress? Did I do the wrong thing and somehow manage to make matters worse?" Leonard rambled, grabbing a screwdriver and screwing in the bolts on one of the compartments. It had already been a month since the twins first arrived at their apartment, and he still wasn't sure if he made the right decision. This could end well, badly, worse, or in something akin to a nightmare that could possible traumatize children and adults alike. "It's been a month, and all there is is small progress. Barely even a leap, if you ask me. What if she doesn't tell him the truth?"

Raj tinkered with the sucker-punch arm, "in my opinion, everything is going well. Can't you see the progress that is happening right in front of our eyes? It's big—huge, even. You know how Sheldon is, and how he reacts to everything. In a just a month, there is a showing of change, and that's good enough progress for me. If she doesn't tell him the truth, then we'll tell him the truth. Unless he figures it out by himself. What do you think Howard?"

"I think," Howard placed the flamethrower dummy into the compartment to check if he got the measurement right, "that you're all getting worked up over nothing. There's still a month left, and a lot can change in a month. In fact, we can all die within four weeks and we wouldn't even know it. But, seriously, Bernie asked me the same thing, and I don't understand why you're all worried. I think everything will be just fine, trust me." He removed the dummy, then twisted the compartment around to tighten it's lock on the metal bar where the flamethrower would be attached. "Besides, if this doesn't pull through, think about the mess we would be caught up in." The three friends nodded in unison, cringing at the thought of what they had to endure if everything doesn't go as they wanted to.

"Well, I guess you guys are right," Leonard sighed, placing the compartment and the screwdriver down. "There's still four weeks left, and who knows, maybe Penny will—" Leonard was cut of by the sound of a laser firing, and a wall getting obliterated by it's force. They all turned towards the first table, where Andy was standing wide eyed in front of the laser, looking very guilty, while Maddie quickly pointed a finger at her twin. "Andy do!"

Four weeks was long enough for more progress, and they knew that Sheldon could do it.

* * *

Nearly two and a half hours later, Sheldon found himself curious on something he forgot to remove from his messenger bag.

The magazine with Penny and the twins on it.

He was already finished with the work he was doing when he received an email from iTunes advertising Penny's show,  _Halfway There_. He normally ignored these emails and would immediately put them in his junk folder, but it was what had reminded him of the uncharacteristic magazine that he had bought the other day. How he forgot about it, he didn't know, but he spent good money on it, so he would read it. Besides, it was just one of those lousy magazines that either had gossip or fashion articles that simply was not to his liking. Raj had a bin full of publications as such, and had once forced him to read one. The magazine was full of gossip and unknown people that he considered burning it to spare anyone else who might ever be forced to read it. But alas, he remembered that magazines like these were mass produced, and that it wasn't just Raj who bought trash like those.

With a small sigh, he pulled the glossy magazine out of his messenger bag and was again, stuck staring at the simple yet interesting cover. He didn't understand it, but there was something about the three blondes that heavily interested him into buying the magazine. There was nothing extravagant about the picture, it was just the three standing in front of a white background while doing their own pose. He enjoyed the look of curiosity in Andy's face as he pretended to read the script, and the bright smiling face of Maddie as she threw the papers in mid air. The toddler always had a knack for creating a mess, and he wasn't surprised to see that her smile was genuine. Then, there was Penny on the cover who looked... nothing like the Penny he once knew. She was in full makeup, with her hair styled and shiny, and she looked happier than he had ever saw her. There was just something about the way his former neighbor's eyes lit up in the picture, and how her smile screamed out that she was happy. He was sure that it wasn't because of the golden trophy in her hands as the prestigious Emmys were later that month, and it was apparent that the picture was taken before the twins came to live with them as Andy's hair was much shorter in the picture.

He removed the plastic sleeve it was in and flipped through the pages until he reached the directory. Penny's article was somewhere in the middle, and after a string of 'what to wear,' 'advice corner,' and a bunch of other nonsensical articles, he found the start of Penny's article.

The first page was of Penny in sweat clothes, sitting down on a chair in front of a makeup table, leaning her body towards it as she grinned. Then sitting on the makeup table was Andy in his pajamas, who was smiling happily as he flicked a brush against his mother's cheek. On the right side of them, was a couch where Maddie sat, applying lipstick on herself and obviously trying to imitate the makeup her mother had, the second page had the words, 'She Makes It Look Easy' on top, followed by the start of the article.

_The Penny who changed Hollywood has been the topic of men and women alike as she took the industry by storm with her beauty, her charm and her big heart. It's impossible to not know who she is—she's Penny, the star of the critically acclaimed, Emmy nominated show Halfway There that instantly became everyone's favorite hobby. In the show, she stars as Jane Brunt, a woman who is given a second chance at life that has to correct her wrongs as well as help other lost souls such as herself move on to the afterlife. Many agree that the blonde gives the character a real feeling to it; she makes us, the viewers, relate to her struggles of correcting her mistakes and try to understand why things happen for a reason._ _**"Jane is just like everyone else,"** _ _Penny says about her character,_ _**"she makes mistakes, regrets them, and wants to fix them. But unlike most of us, she gets a second chance, and that's what's so cool about the story is that she gets what everyone wants but never gets!"** _

_But outside of the television, Penny is something even bigger than the critically praised character—she's a mom to twins!_ _**"At the end of the day, I'm not a girl who died and lived again, or an actress doing her job, I'm a mom who comes home to the best kids a mom could ever have,"** _ _gushes Penny of her twins,_ _**"their names are Andrew and Madison, but I call them Andy and Maddie because they still aren't able to pronounce their names. They're amazing kids, even if they are just toddlers, and I must say that everything I do is for them."** _ _Penny,_ _**26** _ _, rose to fame barely a year ago when her show premiered to a whopping 15 million viewers, and they get bigger with each episode. She already had her adorable twins by then, and we asked her what her kids thought of their mom, the most talked about actress around._ _**"They don't really get the idea of celebrities, but they're really happy when they see me on tv. They even yell, 'look it's mommy' in baby talk, and I just get moved by the emotion because of it."** _

Sheldon turned to the next part of the article, and felt his heart clench at the next picture of the twins and Penny.

Penny was wearing a floral sundress, sitting on the lowest step on a set of outdoor stairs, laughing as she blew a giant bubble, that the camera captured excellently. The sunlight gave the bubble an attractive array of colors, that he found very nice to look at. On the highest step was Maddie in a colorful polka dot dress, with her own bubble wand; her face captured in a blowing expression as she blew bubbles along with her mother. And on a lower step was Andy in a sailor outfit, laughing as he held up a toy plane, angling it towards the bubbles that were up in the air, as of he was going to pop the bubbles that surrounded them. The three of them looked so... happy, and something unexplainable stung in his heart as he continued to stare at the picture. It was an odd feeling that he was akin to when Maddie slept beside him as he worked on his laptop. It was warm, and fuzzy, and made him long for  _something_  he didn't know. Shaking the feeling off, he continued reading the article about his former neighbor.

_With just a season of her show, Penny became a superstar, and we asked her on how she juggled her sizzling hot career, and motherhood._ _**"Oh, it's really hard, I have to admit. They're still babies, and I really believe that that is really important to be there for them all the time,"** _ _she starts,_ _**"they're only just grasping everything, and I want to be the one who teaches them what they need to know. Wanting to be a full time mom and being an actress is stressful, but I just learned how to manage it. I normally bring them on set, and we even made a makeshift daycare for them! There's toys, and beds for their naps, and the crew is just really wonderful and considerate like that. I'm a single mom, but I'm lucky that I'm not alone in raising them. There's the crew, Mr. Fleming, the cast—everyone chips in, and I am just so blessed to have them. We're one big family, my twins and everyone involved in the show."** _ _Regardless of her high profile celebrity status, Penny manages to keep her private life a secret. There have been many talks and rumors about the twin's father, and Penny was more than happy to answer questions about him._

_Q: Penny, a lot of people are curious on who your twins' father is, and you have been quoted to saying that he isn't anyone from the industry. Will we ever hear about him?_

**Penny: The twins' dad is a very private person, and isn't used to the spotlight. I know a lot of people want to take a good look at him and squeeze out some gossip from him, which is why I never mention him. We should all respect his privacy, and he doesn't deserve to be stalked by paparazzi just to ask about what he thinks of me.**

_Q: There are rumors saying that you are dating your co-star from Hindsight, and some say that you're secretly dating James Franco. Are they true?_

**Oh, I hear those a lot! [Laughs] I'm not dating James Franco, the date everyone is referring to was actually a meeting between us and the director of the movie we shot. I'm not dating him, but James is a really nice guy and is super funny. And to make things clear, I'm really not dating anyone right now. I'm more focused on shooting my film, season 2 of** _**Halfway There** _ **and being a mom to my twins. I'm too busy to be dating.**

_Q: Then what about the twins' father?_

**He's a really good friend of mine, and he's very active in the twins' life. He takes care of them when I'm off shooting a movie or for our show, and we see each other whenever I'm free. He's a great dad, and we are lucky to have him.**

_Q: If you were to date, what are you looking for in a guy?_

**Well, they'd have to go through my twins, first! Maddie is very snooty to strangers, and is very picky. She even does this thing where she scrutinizes someone with this look and it makes me and Andy laugh all the time! I'd want a guy who'd accept my twins, and I know that some people think of women with kids as a turn off. I've even seen some of the comments about how me having kids makes me less desirable—and that's okay with me. My kids are my world, and no one can compare to them. But if I were to date, I want someone who's taller than me because I love heels! [Laughs] And I want him to be intellectual—he doesn't have to super intelligent, but I love a good conversation. Me before the twins hated deep conversations, but when their smart selves came into my life, I decided that I gotta keep up.**

_Q: You're twins are considered as Hollywood's new favorite kids—there's a video in the internet of them perfectly reenacting the scene in the season where St. Peter sends you to a trial, and they're barely two years old!_

**Yeah, I've seen that! It was Bailey [Mckenzie] who took the video. We were about to shoot the next scene when we saw the twins doing the scene word by word and we just had to get it on camera! They pronounced a lot of words wrong, but the fact that they memorized the scene by just watching us rehearse makes me really proud. They're really, really smart, and I have to admit that it doesn't come from me. But I'm really proud of them! One time, during rehearsals, I forgot a line and it was Maddie who reminded me that I had to say 'ack' after arguing with Bailey's character. Then, on a different day, Andy came up to me and said, "mommy need to wook sad!" He placed his tiny hands on my lips and turned it to a frown, and we all started laughing because a one year old was teaching me how to act! It's funny and sad at the same time.**

_Q: I was just talking to them as they did your makeup, and I have to say that they're such nice and friendly kids! And they were born for the camera! Do you have any plans on entering them into the business?_

**Nope, not at all! The celebrity life is very tedious, and complicated. Not only do you have to focus on your career, but there's the constant tab on you and your everyday activities and relationships that really makes it look unappealing. But being an actress does have it's perks, but the cons are the ones that I don't want them to experience. But, if it's what they want, then I will be nothing less than a supportive mother. Andy and Maddie reenacts scenes from our show, all the time, and Andy loves getting his picture taken. I won't be surprised if he enters the business one day, but I'm not so sure about Maddie, she likes to think.**

_Q: After this photoshoot, will you be open to appear on more covers with them?_

**I'm not really sure, cause I don't want to expose the twins to the public, too much. They already get seen enough when we go out, and I'd like to keep them a bit private. They're still babies, so they don't really understand my job, yet, and they practically ignore paparazzi. But, I guess I'll be okay with them on another cover. Andy's been giggling the entire time after he saw the final version of the cover, so I'm guessing that he really enjoys it. [Laughs]**

_We were halfway through the interview when the twins decided to join in on the conversation._

_Q: As a successful actress and single mom, what can advice can you give other aspiring actresses and single moms out there?_

**P: Well, I'm really thankful for all the wonderful things that have been happening to me and I have to say—**

**Andy: [In baby talk] Mommy the best! Mommy look at camera and look very pretty!**

**Maddie: [In baby talk] Mommy take pictures!**

_Q: They're loving the camera! Hi! What do you want to say to your mom?_

**M: Mommy! Maddie love you!**

**A: Mommy, Andy love you, too! Take pictures, again, peas!**

**P: [Laughs] Thank you! I love you two, too! I'm sorry I'm laughing, but I just laugh whenever they try to say please and it comes out as peas. I'm sure you've quoted it as peas, but keep it like that! My twins are such loving children and I'm very lucky to have them.**

_Q: Your twins are literally carbon copies of you! It's like you were cloned, and made smaller—you don't look like a mom, you look like their older sister!_

**M: Mommy very pretty.**

**A: Mommy the prettiest!**

**P: Thanks, twins! I know, they really look like me! But I think it's cause of the blonde hair—their hair was the exact shade of my hair when I was a kid before it transitioned to a dirty blonde color. In my opinion, Andy looks exactly like me, cause when my mom showed me my baby picture, I thought that it was Andy! Maddie looks like me, but she looks exactly like her daddy. The only thing she got from me is her hair, and her smile—her eyes are just like her daddy's. But you won't see it until you see their dad. If you only know me, you'd say that Maddie really looks like me, but when you see their dad, it's just the hair and the smile. [Laughs]**

Maddie looks exactly like their father... ?

Who was their father? Was it Leonard? But... Maddie looked nothing like his roommate—but he was sure that it was Leonard! Then that means that they're someone else's children. Were they Kurt? No, looking at the image of Kurt in his mind, he also didn't look anything like Maddie. Was it Zack? Or any other secret boyfriends Penny had while she was dating Leonard? How utterly confusing, this matter was.

Sheldon frowned as he turned to the next page of the article, he'd have to ponder this conundrum later. But when he saw the next image, his frown dropped form his face and was replaced by a look of awe.

The next picture was of Penny crouching down to level with the twins, and on both sides of her was Andy and Maddie, planting a kiss on her cheeks. There was something about the picture that made him want to cry—and he just couldn't understand the feeling. Even though the twins were on facing Penny, he could see the smiles on tugging on the lips as they kissed their mother, who had a genuine smile on her face. He felt the familiar clench of his heart as he reached our, brushing his fingers against the surface of the page that was separating his skin from the happy trio on the page. He didn't know why, but he suddenly wanted to be in the picture as well—which was preposterous, as why would he want to join them? In four weeks, the twins would return to their mother, and he would never see them again. Somehow, that thought made him kind of sad, but that was quickly replaced by the odd feeling he was having because of the picture.

He found himself completely concentrated on the image that he felt like ripping the picture out and framing it on his desk. It was akin to a perfect picture, and it was giving him goosebumps. He felt like an idiot admiring a picture, but he couldn't do anything to stop himself. His hand was still pressed against the image, and he subtly wondered why he was so attached to it. Maybe, because it didn't look like a simple photo shoot, but a happy moment that a camera just so happened to capture. Even with Penny's eyes slightly closed, he could see the way her eyes lit up with happiness. Her green eyes were bright and with the makeup, made them standout. He always found her eyes to be such a nice shade of green, and when she still lived across them, he had seen it change to a light green when she was happy and to a darker shade when she was mad. Andy had inherited those eyes, and he was sure that when it turned green, it would have the same mischief that his mother had. Like what the article said, Maddie didn't get Penny's eyes, but he found her blue eyes nice as well. It also had something... familiar about them that he often wondered where he had seen them before. Shaking off the conundrum, again, and read the last part of the article.

_With her #1 show, her long list of upcoming movies, her Emmy nomination, it isn't surprising to know that Penny is one of the most talked about celebrities today. Everywhere you go, all you'll hear is talk about the Penny that's changing up the scene. Not only did her outstanding acting chops makes us beg for more, but it was also her optimism and the fresh breath of air that she brings along everywhere. Not only is she representing women all over the world for her strength as a single mother, but each and every one of us who has gone through downs, but continued until she finally found her big break._

_Q: You once said in an interview that you worked as a low paying waitress, how was it? How was your struggle into stardom?_

**Penny: Oh, yeah! I was a horrible waitress, and I'm shocked that the Factory [Cheesecake Factory] didn't fire me. They even got me as their new spokesperson! [Laughs] Before I became an actress, I worked there for three years while trying to get a big break. I went to a lot of auditions, and got turned down for the silliest things like; you're too blonde, you're not blonde enough, you look too midwest—and I cried each time. I seriously thought that my career was going nowhere, and even went back to Nebraska where I worked with my dad on his farm. It was nearly a year later when I got the role, and the twins were already my support back then.**

_Q: How did you get the role as Jane, and did you expect your show to be this famous?_

**Before I moved back to Nebraska, I got shortlisted for the role but they gave it to someone else. Then they called me again, saying that the director wanted me for the role and that I was perfect for it. Me, my sister and the twins immediately moved back to California, and I started filming. To be honest, I thought that the show would be panned by the critics and the viewers, because it's not those types of shows that everyone loves. But, after the premiere we got a overwhelming flood of praise and I literally spent a week crying! Gregg [Wilkes] was the one who told me about all the positive feedback and everything continued on from there.**

_Q: What's your favorite part of your show? Mine is the past, present and future scenes._

**That's mine, too! I love how they show the future of the person Jane's supposed to help first, then they show how Jane and the gang meets the person, then it shows the past on why that person turned out that way, then once Jane helps them, it shows the future that the person gets. It's really cool cause first, you'll go oh s/he's a bad person, then Jane meets them in the present, then when you see their past you'll understand why that person lost that way. And it's so amazing because it really shows that everything happens for a reason. Plus, shooting the scenes is jut cool.**

_Q: That's amazing! In addition to your already Emmy nominated role, you just wrapped up your new movie with James Franco that is said to be a potential Oscar winning role for you. Could you tell us about it?_

**Of course! It's about a female scientist who thinks she finds a cure to a new disease that's killing thousands of people, when actually, she only made the disease worse. The story follows her as she deals with guilt she gets as the people she cares for dies, because of her mistake. It's a very heart-wrenching story, and even I felt bad for my character when she had had enough. James [Franco] even shed a few tears at the end of the movie—but I'm not spilling any secrets! [Laughs]**

_Q: You're also working on Hindsight with George Clooney and Scarlett Johansen as the devious, cunning double agent who betrays everyone. How's it like working on an action film, and working with those big names?_

**Action films are hard! I have to train every day for the fighting scenes cause we're all doing our own stunts. We've just finished the California scenes, and are now heading to France to shoot the even cooler scenes! And wow! George Clooney is so handsome in person, and Scarlett is just so awesome. I've loved her ever since I saw her in Lost in Translation, and George has been my crush since forever! They're so nice to me, and I'm there all star-struck before getting into character and betraying both of them. I'm so lucky to work with them, and to be shooting in Paris! It's a real blast.**

_Q: You're also rumored to play as Black Canary in the Green Arrow film. Can you give us a hint about that?_

**[Laughs] I'm really not sure if I'm playing her, but I am honored to even be linked to the project. Who knows, they might get me—and that would be awesome! But right now, I don't think I'm gonna be a superhero. But hopefully I will be in the near future!**

_Q: Thank you for your time, Penny, and twins. The three of you look so fabulous, and we hope that you join us again._

**The twins went on a nap, but they'd be ecstatic to pose for the camera again! And it would be my pleasure to work with you again. You guys are awesome!**

_It's very common to find a lucky penny, but this Penny is rarer than a unicorn with a diamond horn. There are a lot of great actresses here, but Penny is definitely one of the most unique, talented and down to earth actresses out there. We don't have to tell you that, for everyone to see it. Ask for change, and get a Penny, that's what our current motto is._

"Sheldon, what are you reading?"

With a blink, he threw the magazine down on his desk and slammed his folder over and effectively concealing it before looking up at the three men staring at him. He quickly composed himself, raising an eyebrow at his friends. "Hello, you're back early."

Raj adjusted Maddie on his arm and tried to look at what the physicist was hiding. If he wasn't mistaken, it was the new magazine that Penny was featured in. "We had a bit of an accident in the engineering lab and we thought, maybe we could have lunch already?" The other two men silently nodded, and Sheldon stood up form his desk. "Of course. It  _is_  time for lunch, isn't it?"

"And we've definitely got to get the twins into a daycare, or else our budget will be drastically cut." Howard muttered as they walked down the corridor to the cafeteria. None of them disagreed.

* * *

Sunshine Fun Center was somehow... satisfactory. It wasn't a big building, but if Sheldon said it was okay—it was okay. Sheldon didn't approve of the daycares that were held in houses, and that immediately crossed out majority of the daycares nearby. SFC—as they called it—was a pre-school as well as a daycare center, that had excellent reviews on Yelp, and was efficiently located near the university. They even saw some professors who worked at Caltech picking up their children from the daycare.

"At least it's not the Happyness daycare center, you know, like in the Pursuit of Happyness?" Raj joked as the entered the playfully decorated center. The entire lobby was filled with bright colors, life sized cartoon characters and toys (and safety mats) everywhere. The ceiling was even turned to a painted clear blue sky with toy airplanes dangling from various spots. It was a kid's dream- mini playgrounds, one of those floor keyboards that play when you step on it, tube slides that lead to wide ball pits, and TVs that showed all of the children's shows you could think of. Not to mention the fact that there was an ice cream stand at the corner of the room, which made each of them want to be a kid again, except Sheldon—there weren't any comic book heroes or Star Wars characters, therefore everything was idiotic. Especially the annoying cutout of Spongebob who was staring him down.

"It's kind of sad how none of us care about Raj's joke," Leonard commented as Andy released his hand to run up to the mini playground.

Maddie wiggled in Sheldon's hold, extending her hand out to the direction where Andy ran off to. "Maddie want pay, too!"

"You may only play once we enroll you here," he gestured for towards the counter, where an eerily smiling woman was standing at. "Hello, we would like to inquire about your establishments daycare services. The toddler daycare, not the pre-school services."

The woman was still grinning and the four men wondered if it was the actual shape of her mouth. "Hello, to you, too! I'm Brenda, the head personnel here. How old is your child?"

"They're twins at twenty-two months," Leonard answered, lifting Andy up from in front of the playground, and sitting him on the counter. "This is Andy, and that's his twin sister Maddie." The blonde toddlers waved at the redheaded smiling woman, whose smile was still unfaltering. "Oh! Such beautiful babies! Are they yours?" The grinning woman's hazel eyes turned to Sheldon who scowled at her.

Why in the world was the woman staring at him?!

"They're, uh, my sister's," Leonard cut in with a nervous chuckle, looking at Howard and Raj who nodded in approval. "She's out of town and asked me to babysit for her, but with work, I can't fully take care of them. So, I thought of getting them into daycare—I read online that children under two years old are put in the Sunshine program, are they qualified for it?" Brenda—smile still etched on her face—reached into behind the counter then brought out an application form. "Just fill that up, then we'll tour you around the facilities."

Sheldon was about to grab the information sheet when Leonard snatched it from him. "I'll fill this up. Why don't you guys go on and take the tour?" There was definitely something odd with Leonard, and he was going to get to the bottom of it. He shifted Maddie to his other arm as Leonard hid the sheet with his arm. This was beyond suspicious! This was extremely infuriating, and he was going to find out the truth. "Fine, shall either of you be the one to scrutinize the facilities, anything cool will be considered as okay." He looked down on Maddie, who had her head on his shoulder as she watched kids play on the mini playground. "Do you want to see the venue where you shall be spending five days a week at?"

"Pay?" Was the only thing Maddie said, causing Sheldon to sigh as Raj lifted Andy from the counter. "Dudes, I just heard a mom saying that she didn't like the Supremes! How could you  _not_  like the Supremes? It's practically unthinkable!"

Howard peered at the information sheet before moving to where Sheldon and Raj stood, "cause that's important. Come on, let's check out the Sunshine room before Raj charges up to the woman and debates on how she has bad taste in music." He pulled on both Raj and Sheldon's sleeves, dragging them away from the counter. "I'll meet up with you guys, later," Leonard called, barely looking up from the secretive information sheet.

"Andy wike da pace," the toddler happily said as they walked over to where the  _still_  smiling Brenda stood. She looked like a female version of the Joker, except with less makeup. How the twins weren't getting scared, they seriously didn't know. "Hello, again! Are you ready to view the Sunshine room? It's a toddler's dream and anyone who goes in will come out happier than sunshine!"

"Is that why it's called the Sunshine room?" Howard asked as they walked down a long hallway that had several floor to ceiling to windows that showed children of various ages playing with toys. "Yes, each room has a title that symbolizes what we want the kids to experience while they're here. There's the Rainbow room, the Sunny Day room, the Fantasy room," she pointed to various doors, then stopped in front of an arc shaped door that had a mural of a sun smiling down on a couple of kids. "Here we are! The Sunshine room!" She opened the doors, and Sheldon almost had a headache with the brightness of the colors of everything in the room.

"Dis amuh-sen!" Maddie exclaimed, eyes widening at the bright room. "Maddie wike da pace!"

"Your daughter seems to like it here," creepy smiling Brenda remarked, her smile slightly widening. "We'll take good care of your children!" She, again, turned to Sheldon who furrowed his eyebrows, "they're not my—"

"Hey, I finally finished this," Leonard walked into the room, handing the information sheet to Brenda. "I filled everything up, and I placed our information down there."

Sheldon narrowed his eyes at his roommate who angled the sheet so that he couldn't see it. Drat. He knew that his roommate was doing this on purpose—if he wasn't, why was he hiding the sheet from him? He saw what was on the slightly extensive information sheet; it asked about the name of the parents and the children. That was what Leonard was hiding from him! And if he wasn't carrying Maddie, he would have snatched the sheet and read it himself. But not, he would not purposefully drop the innocent toddler just to find out the truth. If he could just see what Leonard placed in child's name, he would see what the twins' last name, therefore, he would be able to get a clue on who their father is! Unless, of course, they had Penny's last name, but according to that magazine, the twins knew their father. Maybe, he could ask them who it was! But they wouldn't possibly know their father's name, and would probably just say daddy, or dad, or papa or something. He wouldn't get answers from simply asking toddlers, but he wasn't going to ask Penny. That would be like throwing down the towel, and he was going to find out on his own. Whether it really was Leonard, or not, he was going to know who it was.

He  _will_  find out the truth.


	7. Interesting Topics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sheldon and Penny have a much needed talk.

In the past week or so that they had been dropping and picking up the twins at Sunshine Fun Center, Sheldon came to the conclusion that Brenda (the head personnel) had a permanent smile etched on her face. And it wasn't even optimism anymore—even when she looked shocked, she was still smiling. The other day, a kid accidentally tripped, and when they turned to look at Brenda, she was still smiling creepily. She looked somewhat deranged—somewhat psychotic—and they often wondered if they made the right choice in daycare. She never stopped smiling and it was giving them the creeps. They had even given her an appropriate nickname; smiling Brenda. Still not in the good way.

"The twins were fabulous, today," greeted smiling Brenda as they entered the Sunshine room to pick up the twins. "They're such smart kids! It didn't even take them a third try to remember Old McDonald, and it really impressed our teachers."

Maddie ran up to Sheldon, automatically lifting her hands up before he picked her up. He would never really understand her love of being carried. "Maddie and Andy say quack!"

Andy nodded as he took Leonard's hand, "and a quack, quack hee and a quack, quack dah!"

They still couldn't pronounce their Rs, but the fact that they already knew the words here and there were a good sign that the daycare was effective. If there was any sign at all that this was a bad center, Sheldon wouldn't need a second thought in pulling the twins out and transferring them to a better one. He saw another daycare center that had equally as great comments, and he was tempted to inquire about their services. However, Sunshine Fun Center was clearly living up to the Yelp comments, and he'd let them go for now. "Are ducks the only animals in the song?" Sheldon asked, raising an eyebrow at smiling Brenda. "I believe that there is more than one animal in that farm."

"They aren't, but your twins seem to have taken a strong liking to the ducks part." Brenda turned around, looking for something before picking up two pieces of paper and handed it to Leonard. "Those are Andy's and Maddie's drawings. They're full of ducks."

"Dat quack!" Maddie pointed out when Brenda lifted the drawings. The first one was of several yellow circles with an orange squiggly line, which was most likely the beak. The second drawing was a bit more specific, there was small yellow circle that had an orange triangle in the middle, and was on top of a bigger yellow circle. The orange crayon wasn't missing this time. "They're very keen on details, and it's impressive as they are barely two years old! We have some kids here that are twice the twins' age, yet still manage to miss key details such as beaks, and fingers. You must be very proud."

Leonard nodded happily as smiling Brenda's smile somewhat widened. She was really scaring him. "Yeah, my sister is really proud of them. They're really smart kids." Brenda thought for a moment, before loudly clapping her hands together, startling both Sheldon and Leonard. "Which reminds me! Will it be okay if we get Andy and Maddie to participate in a small play we will be having next month? They're wonderful actors, and are amazing in memorization!"

"Andy want, peas!" The toddler exclaimed, jumping up and down in excitement. "Andy act wike Mommy!"

"Then I guess it's okay for them to join," Sheldon said when he saw Maddie nod in agreement. "Will it be held here? And what will they be playing as?"

"It's nothing too complicated, just a play that our teachers created. Old McDonald and his animals, and we'd like the twins to play two animals. We'll provide costumes, so you don't have to worry about it." Brenda pointed to the whiteboard that had a sketch of the various animals that would be featured in the play. "It will be very fun, and I hope that all of the parents will be able to make it."

The experimental physicist grinned, wanting to end the conversation as quickly as possible. Brenda had been smiling during the entire conversation, and regardless of how many times they went here, they would never get used to her killer smile. Literally. "We will—we wouldn't miss something as important as that. Anyway," Brenda was still smiling, "we have to go now. We'll see you again tomorrow, Brenda." The redhead blinked—she really didn't have any other expression other than smiling—and gave them a smile that bared her teeth. Which was equally as creepy that the normal smiling expression looked sane. "Alright! We'll see you again tomorrow, Dr. Hofstadter, Andy, Maddie, and Dr. Cooper."

"Bye Bwenda!" The twins waved at the redhead who was waving back at them as they exited the playroom.

Once they had reached the lobby, Sheldon and Leonard finally felt themselves breathe. "Leonard, is it wrong for me to fear that I will have constant nightmares because of that woman?"

"No, cause I'm sure that I'm going to have some of my own, too." Leonard sighed, picking Andy up and walking towards where Raj and Howard sat. "Hey, we're done. Why does Raj look... upset?" Raj looked up, a deep frown etched on his face as Howard simply shook his head. "He overheard two moms talking about Barbra Streisand, and he got pretty pissed." Raj turned to Howard, scoffing before bolting up from the ship shaped bench. "I'm not pissed—I'm offended! First there was that mom disliking the Supremes, now  _this!_  You simply cannot say that Barbra was not a good enough actress in A Star Is Born, and just get away with it! It's the most successful version out there, and Evergreen is still the classic theme song stuck in everyone's head. I wanted to march there and give her a piece of my Streisand worshipper mind, but Howard told me to stop."

"We'd get banned from this place if he continued with his stupid problem," hissed Howard, standing up and gesturing to the exit, "besides, all this bad energy will ruin our image later at Professor Frampton's bachelor party. Now, that he's marrying one of the members of the board, he'll get a bigger access at our research funds, and this is definitely our time to schmooze up to him!"

Sheldon stopped as they reached Leonard's car, "wait, you're planning on going to Professor Frampton's bachelor party? I thought that we were going to spend tonight playing Rock Band 3?" He placed Maddie in her car seat, then lifted Andy up to him in his own. "I thought that we discussed this matter earlier?"

Raj unlocked his car, allowing Howard to get in the passenger side. "Well, yeah, you didn't want to go, we wanted to go, and it's the third Thursday of the month which means," Howard and Leonard both rolled down their windows to say what the day was, "Anything Can Happen Thursday. So, me and Howard are gonna go home and dress up, and Leonard, we'll meet you at the bar?"

"Yeah, I just have to drop off Sheldon and the twins at the apartment, then I'll head there," Leonard reached across, pushing the passenger side door open, "now, Sheldon get in. I still have to get ready." Sheldon glared at Raj and Howard before getting into his roommate's car. "Why was I not informed about this? Didn't we have an agreement that any change in plans will be first consulted? I was not consulted, this is an obvious breach of the agreement, and I say that you all chip in and buy me my own Batmobile. That is the price of this offense."

"Bat-moh-bah?" Andy whispered to his twin.

"Dunno," Maddie shrugged, unsure of what a Batmobile was.

"Okay, first of all, there was no such agreement, and you only just made that up now," Leonard hissed, stopping at the red light. "And second, you can't drive—why would you want a Batmobile?"

"Because, who doesn't, Leonard?" Sheldon shook his head at his roommate's incredulity, "but that's not the point. I still can't believe that you didn't tell me of the change of plans. Who I'm supposed to play with now? Andy and Maddie?"

"Then try and do solo player and try to get five gold stars, or something. I'm sure you could play something else."

"If it were that easy, then I wouldn't be thinking about it, now would I?" Sheldon snapped, sending his friend a glare before turning towards the window. The day simply could not get any worse.

* * *

The problem with being home alone, was that he wanted to play a multiplayer game, and had no one to play with. The perks of being alone, however, was that he got to have some peace and quiet, and got to order the pizza he wanted. But he and the twins could simply not finish a box all on their own, and so he invited Amy to come over. Sadly, the neurobiologist was going to be late and the twins felt like taking a nap, leaving him all alone.

Which was okay, he guessed, as he enjoyed the alone time. He was just a bit used to the noise of the others fighting over an idiotic game, and the twins babbling about something he could barely understand in the background. That was how they lived in the past month, and he had to say that he had gotten accustomed to it. The silence was somehow deafening, and even he couldn't focus on thinking about all of the new problems he could solve. It was like the room was missing something, and it oddly made him sad. Even with the tv on, he still felt lonely, which was shocking, as he never felt lonely. Not when he was all alone in Germany or when he moved to Bozeman for a good five minutes, yet somehow he felt it as he glanced around the empty apartment. He even pushed a disturbing thought back to the farthest corner of her mind—one of creepy Brenda stalking him and ruthlessly killing him with a carving knife while she held on to that psychotic grin of hers.

He flinched at the thought, and decided to think something else.

He stared at his laptop background and checked the time. He still had a while before the pizza and Amy arrived, and the twins would probably only wake up when Amy arrives. Speaking of the twins, he was getting curiouser and curiouser to find out who their father was. He had spent the entire week asking Leonard, Howard and Raj, but they all said that it was someone he knew. None of them said who it was, and all of them said emphasized that it was  _not_  Leonard. He could see it in two ways; one, they were telling the truth, and two, they were lying. He was bad at recognizing his friends' lying faces, and so he was unsure if they were lying. All three of them were excellent liars, and although Leonard had his easy-to-catch times, he was still a great liar, nonetheless. He even tried getting the information record at the daycare, but whenever the attendant asked him why he needed it, he never came up with a good reason. Plus, his face twitched when he lied—he could easily get caught.

He had even re-read the entire article about Penny just to search for clues, as well as googled her to see if there were any hints on who the twins' father was. Alas, his former neighbor was very tight lipped about his identity, and he got the same answers that the magazine interviewer got—that he was a very private mam and that he didn't want to be in the spotlight. It was odd how he was so interested in knowing the twins' identity. Maybe, it was because everyone of his friends knew but him, and no one wanted to tell him. Or because he still felt unsafe knowing that he was allowing Penny and some unknown man's progeny in his if the man was a cold blooded killer, and had thought that they had kidnapped the twins and killed him? If he were to die that way, then he would have died without getting a Nobel. He was not taking that risk, which was why he was dead set on finding out who this mystery man was. He could be anyone from a mass murderer to the richest man in the world, and it would be next to impossible to track him down if he didn't have any basis to start the search at.

Although, he was a hundred percent sure that their father was  _not_  Howard. Because, if he was, then it would be the end of the world, and it was like saying that his mother was not slightly bigoted or racist. In other words, it was impossible, and if he were to be proved wrong, he would jump out the window, and shall he survive, he would make sure to throw away his life by becoming a hobo.

If Howard really was their father, then that would mean two things. One, it would end Penny and Bernadette's friendship, and would cause complete utter chaos. And two, that he would lose the very little respect that he had restored for Penny, because it was Howard. Even though they were engaged, he often asked Bernadette of she was sure that she wanted to marry Howard. He liked Bernadette, even if her job was stupid. She was nice to him, could cook, and could control Howard, and that was good enough for him. Sadly, the engineer was not good enough for her, in his and Mr. Rostenkowski's opinion, which was why he would feel bad for her if Howard really was the twins' father. He would also start on creating the machine that could edit humans, and remove any of Howard's traits from the twins, shall he really be their father. God, he hoped not. The twins were already okay, in his book, and he'd hate that positive outlook to be tarnished by Howard's genes. They were even turning out to be satisfactory human beings.

When he gave them the magazine that featured them and their mother, they didn't rip it, slobber on it, or chew it, as he thought they would do. Instead, they quickly looked for their next pictures, and asked them if it would be okay to frame it. He was impressed that they knew what framing meant, and as a reward, he bought them a second magazine where they would get the pictures from. They cut out the photos with the three blondes on it, and they were now framed and sitting on the end table that resided beside Leonard's bed. The rest of the magazine was recycled, and he didn't care where it went. Originally, he had intended to keep the final image of the photo shoot for himself—but why would he? He had not relation to any of the blondes, and that would make him look insane. Rather than doing that, he went online to the website of the magazine, searched for the unedited image and simply saved it in one of the password protected folder. He wasn't going to tell anyone this, but whenever he looked at the picture, he felt relaxed and hurt at the same time. It was somewhat relaxing, yet gave his heart clench. He didn't understand why, but he chose not to question it, and considered it as a visual stress ball.

Even after a week, he still couldn't understand the pain he felt whenever he looked at the pictures. He'd just look at any of the pictures, and he'd automatically feel his heart clench slightly. It didn't make sense to him; it was relaxing yet painful at the same time, like some sort of masochism experience. Bittersweet was the appropriate word for it, and he wondered if he was going insane. Though, he wasn't crazy, his mother had him checked! But, looking at his problem from a different angle only confused him more. He didn't see any obvious reason as to why he would feel that way towards a picture, much less one of Penny and her children. Something about those pictures kept drawing him in, causing him to only get more and more befuddled. He was at a loss at why he was feeling that way, and he wanted answers. It wasn't like him to stare at a picture, unless it was a signed one or a Where's Waldo puzzle. His train of thought was abruptly broken by his laptop making a dinging sound.

 _Penny Blossom has accepted your request._  Barely a second later, the aforementioned user was Skype calling him, and he hesitated slightly before accepting the call.

A window opened, and he was met by Penny who looked quite startled. "You answered the call."

"I am not sure if that's a question, but yes." The blonde rolled her eyes, and he frowned. Why wouldn't he answer the cal, when it was her who never accepted his request? "Is there a reason why you called? It's about three in the morning, and you're not a morning person. You're not supposed to call until four, there."

"Okay, stop bombarding me with questions," Penny started, she didn't look sleepy or grouchy, but actually looked really energetic. What happened to her eleven o' clock rule? "I called in because Leonard told me that he wasn't home, and that it was just you and the twins. I wanted to say hi." She sent him a small smile, and like Brenda's creepy nightmare-ish grin, his frown did not falter. "I'm sorry to say that the twins are currently napping. They seem to have tired themselves out while they were at the daycare. I suggest you call again in an hour or so, if you can. Goodbye—"

"Wait," Penny called as he was about to click the end button, "why are you in such a rush?"

Sheldon furrowed his eyebrows at the screen. Was this woman insane? They had absolutely nothing to talk about other than what the twins were doing, did, will do. That was the only topic of discussion that they could ever converse about! They no longer had anything in common other than their friends, but he had zero interest in what she and the others talked about. Even when she still lived across from them, they had nothing to talk about, and he didn't like banal chit chat. She of all people should know that. "Penny, we have nothing to talk about, and aren't you supposed to be shooting your film?"

"Actually, we stayed up all night shooting the night scenes, and I drank too much coffee," the blonde nervously chuckled, and he simply shook his head. Penny always had a knack for relying on caffeine when she needed energy. After the nearly three years of mooching off from them, she still has yet to learn that fruits are much better energizers than coffee. "So, I'm pretty much going to be awake for awhile."

"Then I suggest you try to get some sleep or else you will ruin your sleeping cycle—"

"Sheldon, what the hell is your problem? Why are you trying to get rid of me?" Sheldon's frown only deepened, and he thought of ending the call right then and there. He could do that, and he didn't know why he wasn't doing it. Maybe, it was the last ounce of respect he had for her. "Penny, you and I both know that we have nothing to discuss, and that we have nothing else in common other than the people we associate with. Why would you continue to press on when we both know that your efforts will be futile?"

"Is this still because of the birthday gift incident?" Yes, but there were more reasons to that. Penny didn't know what he had to endure due to her absence. It was Leonard crying day and night over her. Anything that could possibly had a memory with Penny—which was practically everything in their apartment—made Leonard cry, and he even briefly thought of kicking Leonard out. Even Howard and Raj got emotional whenever they came over and the three all held discussions on how much they missed the blonde. Bernadette was the only one who he allowed to get emotional, as she was a girl and was Penny's close friend; she didn't get a strike for crying when she saw 4B's door. All three of his friends had to go through his online class five times after all the strikes he gave them. The emotional outbursts were one thing, but the Leonard threats were another one. During the first month of Leonard's grief, he often didn't go to work, which left him a conundrum of how to go to work. Leonard wouldn't move from his bed, and so he had to use the bus. And one horrible time, the bus driver suddenly stopped, and he crashed into the seat in front of him. He got a bloody nose from it, and his new white Quicksilver shirt got ruined because of it.

"Professor Lancaster died last year," stated Sheldon, sounding unhappy, "when he was still alive, and saw us at the cafeteria, he would greet everyone but me. And when we did get a chance to finally speak, he gave the birthday gift incident much emphasis. I didn't apologize, of course—why would I?—and we never talked again. At his wake, his son referred to me as 'the only guy who his dad didn't get a birthday gift from.' And though, the rest of his children called him a spiteful man in their eulogies, I am still very offended by what that old man insufferable man put me through." The light flickered. "And may his soul rest in peace."

"I don't know how many times I have to say it, but I'm sorry," she said, sounding as though she was actually sorry for what she did. "But I  _had_  to leave, Sheldon. I couldn't take anything anymore—my unsuccessful career as an actress, the relationship I screwed up with Leonard." Penny paused for a moment, mumbling something inaudible before continuing, "and if I didn't leave, I would be unhappy. I didn't want to work at the Cheesecake Factory forever, and I didn't want to keep on hurting Leonard. So, I ran away to Nebraska, and tried to find myself there."

"Did you find yourself? Are you happy now?"

Penny smiled softly, and he compared it to the one in the magazine. This was one was the same one as the final image, but there was something off about it. It wasn't a bad thing, but there was something different about it. "Yes, I have to say that I'm really happier than I ever was. My dreams are finally coming true, and I wouldn't have it any other way. Have you ever watched my show?" The physicist shook his head before reaching under the side table and pulling a magazine out. "No, I have not, but I did get this for the twins," he brought up the magazine, Penny's eyes widening in response. "They saw it at the comic book store and asked me to buy it. They wanted to frame the images of the three of you in Leonard's room, so I bought another one." He placed the magazine down on the coffee table, then turned it over. "They have the pictures framed beside their bed."

"I didn't know that that's already out," she murmured, slightly frowning, "did you read the article about me?" Yes, he did, but he didn't care much about it. Instead of reading it, he was somehow more focused on the image that—for some unknown reason—was giving him an odd feeling. He had even went so much as saved it on both his phone and his laptop, because of how enthralled he was with the picture. Due to his actions, he even wondered if he needed to go to Camarillo Mental Institute. "No, I did not, but I saw the pictures. The three of you looked nice."

"Thank you! It was a really fun photo shoot, and I loved working with the twins." Penny had a wider, happier, smile on her face, and Sheldon wondered if she had ever smiled that way when she still lived in 4B. Maybe, she really was happier. "Speaking of the twins, how are they? Are they misbehaving? Are they eating their vegetables? How are they doing at the daycare? Did they get recognized?"

"Penny," he cut in before Penny continued her rambling, "I gave you a complete status report yesterday, but because you are high on caffeine, I will answer all of your questions. They are fine, and are currently napping. No, they are not, and they have not done a tantrum since a few weeks ago. They eat a balanced meal three times a day, and we made sure that the daycare did, too. Surprisingly, the daycare was very strict on what toddlers were supposed to eat, and it actually impressed me. And for the last question," he raised any eyebrow, "only one mom recognized them. It was when we picked them up, and the mom saw them. She even had your new magazine in her hands, and immediately ran up to us asking different questions. We introduced ourselves as your personal team, and the woman said to tell you hi. So, hi."

The other day, as they were picking up the twins, a woman who had the magazine recognized them and ran up to them. At first, they wanted to deny it, but when the woman lifted the magazine next to the twins' face, they could no longer deny it. Like Stuart, the woman went on to take pictures with the twins before trying to pry information out of them. She kept on asking if Penny would ever go to the daycare, and when she would, and where she lived. Raj told them that the mom might have been one of Penny's rabid fans. After taking pictures, the women went on and on about how much she loved Penny's show, and how she already memorized the trailer for Penny's new movie. They all found her creepy, but with smiling Brenda grinning like lunatic at the information desk, she wasn't that bad. The woman them informed them on when she picked up her children, and gave them her number for when Penny comes to the daycare. Not gonna happen.

"She sounds nice," Penny commented, and Sheldon was sure that if Penny met the woman, she would be creeped out, too. Then again, the fanatic mom was much more sane than smiling Brenda. There was an air of silence between them before Penny spoke again. "Look, Sheldon, I'm really sorry for everything that happened after I left. I was a coward for running away from me problems, but I don't regret my actions. But I do regret breaking your trust. You may not know this, but I consider you as my best friend, and to think that you no longer see me as a friend..." Penny gave him a sad smile, and he prepared for any tears. "I know you really didn't forgive me when the twins asked if we were friends. That's why I'm making use of the twins' absence to apologize. I don't want them to just cry and make you say something you don't mean. I really want to be friends with you again, but I'll understand if you don't forgive me, right now—"

"Penny, let me just stop you right there," he interjected, having had enough of Penny's ramblings. If he allowed the blonde to continue, he would have to endure a long while of Penny regretting what she did to him and that would only make him feel guilty. Plus, she was getting it all wrong. "Do not get me wrong, we  _are_  friends. I said that we were, and I do not go back on my words. Even if I said them in such circumstances, there is no need to take it back. So, please stop being all emotional, and do get on with the point."

"We're friends?"

"Yes, we are," he nodded, and resisted the urge to frown when Penny's face broke into a wide grin. "But please bear in mind that does not mean that the remaining strikes bestowed to you will be eradicated. They will be put into effect when you return, and I highly suggest that you take the online classes while you can."

"I'll take those classes when I have free time." The smile Penny had was so wide that he felt as if smiling Brenda had turned into Penny. "So, now that we're friends, are you going to stop being rude to me?" Rude? When was he ever rude to her? If you asked him, he was nothing but friendly! Being rude was if he ignored her right now, and he was doing the exact opposite. He was even so kind as to not push through with his plan to end them to France. "Penny, I do not do rude. I am everything but  _rude_. Can't you not see my natural friendliness and playfulness?"

The blonde giggled and he wondered what was so funny was about what he said. "Yeah, you're the friendliest and funnest person I know, Sheldon. So, how are you? I didn't get a chance to talk to any of you these past two days cause we've been trying to meet a deadline. We just found out that we're going to shoot in Tokyo for a day or two, and we have to finish everything before flying out there."

"If you're going to Tokyo, would you mind if I ask you to buy me some things? If you consider it as a favor, I'll return you a favor by teaching your twins all of the words in the dictionary." He grabbed a piece of paper from the end table and looked at the items needed. "It's just a few video games that were not released internationally, a couple of manga books, and some action figures. I can deposit the needed amount in your account, just give it to me and I'll make Leonard do it."

"No, I'll buy them as a thank you for taking care of the twins. Leonard told me that you're really looking out for them, and I'm really happy that you're getting along with them. They always tell me about how great you are, you know."

Sheldon smirked; merely a month and the twins were already worshipping him. But it was inevitable, as he was such an interesting person. Even if he didn't see the fun side of him at first, they eventually saw it and now looked up to him as their role model. What a good choice, indeed. He knew that hew as leaving a great mark in the twins' life, and he was sure that one day, when they accomplish something mediocre, they'd thank him for changing their future. In a few more months, he would sure that he would be such a great influence that they could even grow up to be a surgeon. Maybe even a rocket scientist if they stayed for another week. It was impossible for them to love him, he was just so amazing. "Of course, they like me—I'm just so likable."

"You didn't answer my question, how are you? You never really gave me an actual answer than you're doing okay. You know about my daily activities, yet I know nothing about you." Penny frowned slightly, and he knew that she was mocking him. She was always mocking him, and he had already grown to used to it. At least she wasn't using sarcasm—he still couldn't understand it, and no matter how many books and articles he read about it, he still couldn't grasp it's concept. "Well, I'm still one of the best physicists in Caltech, and I just got another raise. I'm currently working on a collaboration with Raj on Dark Matter, am doing a lot of progress in my research on String Theory, and have recently published a paper regarding a method of synthesizing a new super heavy element. Other than that, there's nothing new in my life." Sheldon pursed his lips, in though, "oh, and there are two toddlers currently living with Leonard and I, but I'm sure that you know about that."

Penny's smile slightly faltered, unlike smiling Brenda's face that seemed to be stuck in that creepy grin. "What do you think about the twins? Are they okay? I heard from Amy that you're planning on having a baby together."

"Oh, that! No, that is no longer in effect, Leonard put a stop to that plan about a year ago." This time, it was Penny's turn to raise an eyebrow, "Leonard kept on saying how we can't just have a progeny just because we want on. And he suddenly got mad when he discovered that Amy and I had no plans of living together, shall we have a child together. He kept on saying how children were gifts and that they were meant to be loved, not shaped into future overlords that will guide humanity into a better tomorrow. So, after much badgering, I decided to cancel it. Therefore, the future Sheldons will have to wait to wait before they turn the world into their oyster. Your twins can be my future children's right hand trustees. As they have grown on me, I will make sure that they have a secure position in the future world that my future children will establish. I'll even make you head of entertainment, if that pleases you."

"Your future children will make the  _twins_  their right hand trustees?" Penny's face changed from a happy grin, to a look of skepticism. Her face twisting into a small frown while raising her eyebrows.

He nodded, the twins were proving to be future useful members of the community. They would, without no doubt, be beneficial to his future intellectually superior benign overlord children who would guide humanity to be a better tomorrow. He could already picture it in his mind: his powerful children ruling the world while the twins delivered their orders. The twins would be their right hand, who everyone feared, but not as much as his children. Like the hand of the king, or something like that. In the month that passed, the twins were showing signs that they wouldn't grow up to love shoe shopping and that was okay in his book. He didn't expect much from two blondes, but he knew that they had potential—that if molded, would lead into great things. And if mitosis is still impossible for humans, who knows, maybe the twins could marry one of his children. He was really that generous. "Yes, I am  _that_  generous, aren't I? I will also allow them to marry one of my progeny, if they are not already arranged to someone higher. Think about it, Maddie could be the future wife of the second most powerful—I, being the first—man in the world." He pursed his lips in thought before giving Penny a tight grin. "Madison Cooper has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?"

For some unknown reason, Penny started laughing wildly, clutching her stomach as she continued the dissonant chortling.

"What's so funny?" Sheldon asked, his tone laced with sheer harshness as he watched the blonde continue on laughing. If he had a piece of chocolate for her behavior, he wouldn't feed it to her, he would throw it at her. Was this the cause of drinking too much caffeine when you were already drooping with exhaustion? Unless she was going insane, he was going to award her another three strikes for ruining such a generous act from him. "Penny, I demand that you tell my why you are laughing or else I will end this call, block you from my account, and find away to ship your children out to Paris. And do not mistake this as a joke of some sort, as I am dead serious."

The blonde held up a hand as her laughter lessened, taking deep breaths as she tried to calm herself down. How annoying, Sheldon thought. "I'm sorry, I just found the fact that you want  _my_  kids to marry  _your_  kids to be hilarious!" Penny let out a couple more giggles, and he was unsure if this was an insult and if he should be offended. What was so wrong with what he said? He failed to see anything wrong about it, so why was Penny laughing?! "Don't take it as an offensive comment, but it was just really funny. Three or five years ago, you would have most likely ban me from the apartment if I was the one who brought up that idea. Yet, look at you now! You're even planning on setting up an arranged marriage between Maddie and one of your other children. You'd find it hilarious, too, if you were in my position, I swear." She was now grinning, and he was not the least bit impressed. But as he was very kind, he'd giver her a chance to redeem herself. "And I love how you think that Madison  _Cooper_  has a nice ring to it—cause I definitely agree! Can I ask you a question?"

"Seeing as that is already a question, go ahead." Sheldon narrowed his eyebrows at the blonde on his laptop screen and crossed his arms. "What if you wanted Andy to marry one of your intellectually smart super overlord kids? Would you let your daughter take my son' last name, or something?" Where was this conversation even leading up to? He was starting to find Penny's questions as nonsensical, and irrelevant and he was only responding as he wished to see why she found what he said funny. So, far, he only learned that he'd have to be in her position before he could find it funny. He would—in no way—ever want to be in her position. He was happy with his life (though, he would like to finally find a way to invent a time machine) and he had no interest in pursuing an acting career as his former neighbor had. Never in a million years. "Of course not! My daughter will continue to bear the name that is Cooper. I'm afraid Andy will have to change his last name into the proud name that is my last name—he'll be more respected if he does that."

Penny's grin slowly widened, as if she just had a brilliant idea. A brilliant, maniacal and devious idea. She was really starting to resemble smiling Brenda. Well, not really, as Brenda had red hair and hazel brown eyes, while Penny had blonde (natural color most likely a dirty blonde) and green eyes—but the way Penny smiled made them look the same. Like a crazy person. "So, he'll have to change his name into  _Andrew Cooper_ , right?"

"Exactly! He could get Cooper hyphenated, but that matter will be up to Andy." Sheldon solemnly told her, nodding as he unfolded his arms. He was glad that Penny was finally grasping the generosity he was planning on giving to the twins. They were practically going to be the consorts of the future benign rulers, Penny should be lucky that from such an early time, he was already granting her a thrice removed seat on the throne that his children will build. He envisioned a throne akin to the one depicted in A Song of Fire and Ice (not the one featured in the show, as he refused to believe that that puny chair was more than a thousand swords) tall and intimidating—but that would be in a more advanced time, so a futuristic chair would be more appropriate. Maybe, one that hovered, and could teleport, as that would not only showcase their power, but also their greatness as the only ones to have teleporting chairs. Chair, not car. "Can't you imagine it, Penny? It would be wonderful! And with your title as the mother-in-law? I'm sure that my future followers will throw discounts left and right at you whenever you go shop for shoes. Unless, of course, it is the rebellion—that cannot be avoided—who serve you at the mall, then you would most likely be killed. I'm sorry, but I cannot to pay the ransom they'll ask to return you, Penny. That would only be me consenting them."

He shook his head as he envisioned the catastrophe that would stem from Penny shopping without any of the security forces his children would allow the twins to use to protect their mother. Relatives are always the targets of the opposing sides, and if one of the twins  _does_  marry one of his overlord children, then that would make Penny a relative. The bubbly (who might not be as bubbly when the time comes) blonde would want to shop for shoes, and she tells her security to go and eat at the food court, and—BAM! She gets kidnapped for ransom, and the opposing side asks for a large sum of money, and for them to free the rest of the rebels. He and his children would not agree—regardless, of how much the twins beg—as the lives of many will be at stake with the release of the rebels, and they kill Penny. He'd have to make her birthdate a special day for her, and they'd all remember her as that one irrelevant person who became a hero. Unless, the rebels got fed up with her incessant yammering when mad, and decides to set her free as that would be an even better way to torture him. Darn. "I can already see how everything will happen, and I can safely say that you should just stop shopping altogether."

Sheldon lowered his gaze back to the laptop screen and saw Penny watching him with a small smile. What was with women and eerily smiling?! "Why are you smiling as if you want to skin me alive, kill me then feed me to a lake filled with piranhas?"

"Nothing," she replied, resting her the side of face on her palm. The coffee must have finally stopped working—he really hoped so. "I'm just fascinated by your vivd imagination! And I gotta say, it's  _really_  thoughtful of you to not take me back from the rebels. As the mother of your future unnamed progeny's wife-slash-husband, you really valued me right there."

"Sarcasm?" He bluntly asked and Penny playfully winked in return—that was when he remembered something he wanted to ask the blonde since the start. How he forgot about asking her about it, he didn't know. But it was great that his eidetic memory stopped failing him and reminded him about it. "Which reminds me, I've wanted to ask you something for quite a while, now."

"Go on. You've been answering all of my questions, so I definitely owe you some. Isn't that something that you taught me?" Penny smirked at him as she gave him a thumbs up. "Throw the ball and I'll catch it, Sheldon." Ignoring the horrible metaphor that probably wasn't an actual metaphor, he took a deep breath. There was something about what he was about to ask that made him not want to ask it. There was a rather ominous feeling that was telling him that he was not going to like the answer that Penny was going to give him. That whether the blonde lies or tells the truth, he would not be happy with the answer. Why was such a simple and important question starting to seem foreboding? And why was he starting to fear the question itself? How foolish. Sheldon Cooper did not get frightened by irrelevant questions! Only birds, spiders, germs, hospitals, wild bears, lions, crocodiles, chickens and an entire list of things could scare him, but questions could not. He ate seemingly impossible questions to solve for breakfast, and spit the answers by lunch. He was close to solving String Theory, so this should be a cinch. Or something.

"Who are the twins' father?"

There was an air of silence, and he watched as Penny's eyes widened. His palms started to feel unreasonably clammy, and he was getting agitated by how Penny dumbly stared at the her side of the screen. The ominous feeling was back, grimmer and inauspicious than ever. The silence was staring to eat him alive—the answer shouldn't be so hard to say! All he needed was a name, then he'd be done with the conundrum that was bothering him each time he remembered the single missing detail he didn't know about the twins. Not only was he curious to find out, he was  _anxious_  to know about it. A part of him wanted the father to be Leonard, but that was still questionable. He was uneasy at the thought of letting some stranger's children in his house, regardless of the fact that they were also Penny's children, and that he was already more than accustomed to the tykes. They were quickly mixing into his routine, and as a creature of habit, he did not like change. It already took a lot for him to adjust to them being temporarily in his life, and it would take a lot more for him to get rid of them shall they prove to be Zack or Kurt's or some idiot's children. Unlike, Penny who barely took a second to disregard all of them, he realized that it wouldn't be too easy to do the same for the twins.

As much as he didn't want to admit it, they were good kids. There were even times were he didn't think that them being there was a bad idea. It was nice to have worshippers around, even if they still didn't consider him as fun. He no longer got annoyed as much as he used to whenever Andy pestered him with questions while they watched movies. Though he didn't understand her love for it, he had gotten used to Maddie wanting to get carried, and him carrying her. Now, whenever she so much as lifted her arms, he would automatically lift her up. Like a dog to the ringing of a bell, but he no longer resisted it. It really was good exercise for him, and the constant one arm carrying of the toddler made him much better at Trestling. He even managed to beat all three of his weak opponents in barely a second! However, he couldn't say the same with his left arm, but he was working on it. Their routine (since they started daycare) even synchronized and fit perfectly with his. The two of them were even beneficial than he thought them to be, and he wondered if he really would kick them out shall they not be Leonard's children. He wasn't sure.

Penny visibly took a deep breath, her startled expression turning into a serious one. "Sheldon, the truth is the twins' father—"

The blonde was interrupted by four knocks on the door, and Sheldon immediately knew who it was. "Penny, hold that thought," he ordered before standing and making his way towards the front door and opening it. "You're late."

Amy lifted her gaze and cocked an eyebrow, "hello to you, too, Sheldon. I already informed you that I would be late, and I am. Wouldn't you be much more annoyed if I said that I were to be late yet arrived early?" Sheldon frowned at his friend; he hated it when she outsmarted him. This must have been the result of her work with monkeys—being around monkeys was very relaxing, and could possibly help people become smarter. That was actually just made up by him, but if he were to be allowed to work beside a monkey, he might be able to quicken his research and get that much awaited Nobel sooner than expected! Imagine if he got to do his work beside a monkey while being aboard a train! "You are right, I would be much more annoyed if you did show up on a later time than the specific time that you said you would arrive." He stepped back, motioning his arm towards the chair. "Please, do sit down."

The brunette silently nodded, walking towards the leather couch. "Oh, and that reminds me; there is a pizza delivery man standing in the front your apartment and seeing that it  _is_  a Friday—and that it was from Giacomo's—I believe that it was yours." She sat on the farthest from her spot, her head still turned towards the physicist. "And I heard him mumbling that he had zero intentions of walking up four flights of stairs, so I'd reconsider that tip you always give."

"That is completely unacceptable!" Sheldon hissed, marching towards his desk to grab his wallet. "It is part of their company policy to deliver the pizza at the  _doorstep!_  The doorstep is four stories high, then you have to climb those four flights of stairs!" Completely forgetting about the conversation he was having with Penny, he stormed past the brunette and the blonde on the screen and slammed the door behind him. He was going to give this policy breacher a piece of his mind.

* * *

Amy stared at the front door that received harsh treatment merely seconds ago. She wasn't lying about the pizza delivery man not wanting to go up—but she wished that Sheldon didn't just leave her alone in the apartment.

Sheldon was a bit more impulsive than he thought, and that got her thinking of a new research she could conduct via placing electrodes in ones brain to monitor their specific responses to her questions. How much does one really know oneself? That would be the title of her new experiment that would most like create buzz in the neuroscience community. She knew a lot of people who were not aware of some traits they had that they also denied having. Like one of her colleagues in the department who kept on denying that he was manic depressive even when they normally caught him laughing then suddenly crying about how the window got dirty. Although, some have said that he was just south of going insane, but she was going to take her chances. It's just like how people determine if someone has an addiction; they constantly deny it even though they were already caught in the act. Maybe, she could even combine this new research with the current one she was doing with drug addicted monke—

"Amy, is that you?" A voice—that sounded a lot like a certain gorgeous blonde—called out from somewhere. The brunette scanned the room for any sign of another person (or hallucination) and found her eyes locked with Sheldon's laptop. It was her bestie! On the screen! She got to spend another fun day chatting with Penny! "Bestie, hello! How are you? How long have you been online? Is the weather fine there in Paris? Is Paris treating you well? Isn't it almost five in the morning there? Why are you awake? How can you still look so radiant at such an ungodly hour?!"

Penny blinked at the brunette who was now in front of her screen. She didn't expect Amy to turn up, or Sheldon impulsively leaving just to argue with the delivery guy in how he's doing his job wrong. She was  _so_  ready to tell Sheldon the truth—it was hard to keep up with their conversation without blurting out the truth—but it seemed like this wasn't the right time. If there was one thing she learned in her twenty-five years of life; it was that things happened for a reason. It could be for a stupid reason, or a wonderful life changing reason, but a reason was still a reason. That's what she liked to believe; it keeps her optimistic. Then the truth would either have to wait, or make Sheldon find it out by himself. Because this charade was not going to last forever. "Uh, hello to you, too, Amy. I can't really answer all those questions at the same time, so... yeah I'm doing good. What are you doing over at 4A?"

"Sheldon invited me over as the guys are currently attending a tenured professor's bachelor party that Sheldon didn't want to attend."

Oh, another tenured professor that Sheldon didn't do something for. If she somehow becomes the blame for Sheldon not going, she was definitely going to find a way to threaten Caltech's entire tenure committee to never have any event, again. One incident was good enough, and she had no plans of getting involved in another one. She already checked the website Sheldon made for the classes, and with the amount of strikes she had—she was going to have to sit in front of her laptop for quite a while. "I see. Uh, so, how are you, Amy?"

"I'm glad that you asked, bestie!" The brunette's face lit up as she scooted closer to the laptop, "my research on drug addicted monkeys is going well! I finally got them hooked on chewing tobacco, and am now surveying their reactions to replacements like chewing gum." Penny smiled at the ecstatic neurobiologist that was telling her of the new experiments that her department was conducting. Amy was nice—she was a bit odd, sometimes, but she was okay. Based on what Bernadette said, Amy was actually really great once you get to know her more, and that she had started binge watching Halfway There just so she could talk about it with Penny. She also said that Amy and Sheldon had a peculiar (in the good way) relationship, and that they were all betting on when Sheldon would finally ask Amy to be his girlfriend. She didn't know much about their relationship, yet, so she decided not to take part in the betting. It was a shame, cause the stakes were getting pretty high.

"So, Amy hows's your and Sheldon's relationship going?"

"Ah! Gossip! The international language that everyone can speak," Amy adjusted her glasses as she thought. "Our relationship is still on a solid plateau that is slowly crossing the oceans towards our desired destination." Penny looked confused, and Amy continued, "you cannot rush things with Sheldon. Sheldon has great difficulty adjusting to change, and if not brought into it properly, he would be like a proton torpedo going down an open exhaust port—he explodes. Homeostasis is the name of his game, and if you want to change something with him, it has to be slow. Like trying to get monkeys hooked on a different kind of drug, you lessen the old one, and slowly bring in the new one." Like her experimental monkeys, Sheldon was not easily pushed towards change. It took a while before he even acknowledged the budding relationship between them—specifically after the comic book store owner, Stuart, tried to ask her out on a date. Sheldon stalked them to the movie theatre, and proposed that they change their platonic relationship to something a bit more than friends, but it wasn't an actual relationship, either. But she would take what she could get.

Another instance of Sheldon not being able to habituate to change was during the time that she first met him. He was distant, and always had an irritated-slash-far away look on his face. When she talked to (the emotionally distressed) Leonard about it, he said that Sheldon was still irritated by one of their friends just disappeared without so much as a goodbye. He said that even though Sheldon didn't say it out loud he missed that friend of their greatly, and he was having trouble adjusting to not having her around. Thinking about it now, that friend was  _Penny,_  as Sheldon had moments where he would suddenly ramble about how much Penny had ruined their lives by saying hello. She did not know much about the car stopping blonde actress back then, and if she did, she would most likely berate Sheldon for speaking so ill about her. But now that she understood the fact that Sheldon hated change, she could safely say that he was clearly upset when Penny left. The blonde was just so life changing like that.

Then about four months after she had met the guys, Leonard suddenly left Pasadena for about a week, which further distressed Sheldon. With his bespectacled roommate gone, she, Raj, Howard and Bernadette often alternated in driving him to work. Sheldon tried to contact Leonard several times, but his roommate never replied. Sheldon got even more upset than ever, and that was when she started hearing his hatred for Penny. He would say, "if Penny never said hi to us in that hallway—Leonard is equally as guilty—then we wouldn't be in this mess!" When she asked about what exactly the 'mess' was, he said, "if Penny ignored us, then Leonard would have never fallen head over heels obsessed with her. Thus, they would never have gotten into a relationship, she never would have broke his heart  _twice_  by breaking up with him and leaving the state, he would've never turned into an emotional mess that suddenly upped and left leaving me into a very irritated man!" It took a trip to the zoo with Raj to calm him down, and about a week later, Leonard returned.

Leonard's return even made it worse. For some unknown reason, Leonard completely stopped talking to Sheldon. He still drove him to work, bought him food and did the rest of their routine, but he never talked to him. Sheldon got so frustrated with it that he became worried, and tried to buy Leonard sudden dislike for him with various objects. Then, one day after having had enough of Sheldon's incessant asking of why he was mad at him, Leonard had an outburst then forgave him. Everything went back to normal after that, but Leonard disappeared at least once a week for the next six months without any explanation of where he was going. After that, it was Leonard and Raj who started going somewhere that they never told Sheldon about. From what she heard from Bernadette, it was then that they were all meeting with Penny who had just moved back to California with the twins after she had gotten the role in her show. She knew that Sheldon never went with them, as she was the one who was putting up with his whining of them leaving him when the others were out with Penny. Had she known Penny, then, she would most likely choose her over Sheldon.

The most recent instance of Sheldon and change was when the twins came to live with them. Admitted, she only found about the twins when they were at the park, but she had been hearing Sheldon whine about something he found unacceptable about a month before. He was most likely talking about the twins. He never actually mentioned them, but he would sometimes tell her, "don't be fooled by tiny organisms—it only takes one action for them to knock superior beings down without a single thought." She still has yet to understand what he meant by that, but thinking about it now, it was the twins. They were the only tiny organisms in their apartment, unless he was talking about Leonard doing something he disapproved of. That was about two or three weeks ago, and things have surely changed. Whenever she caught up with Sheldon, he would mention the twins at least once in the conversation, and his comments weren't as negative as she thought. Sheldon would say, "the twins are doing excellent progress in solving puzzles. They seem to be a natural," or "Maddie did the silliest thing today; she and her twin wee building blocks when she got frustrated and threw the block at the tower. She missed, and it his Leonard's coffee, causing it to spill all over his futile research. It was hilarious." He sounded like some sort of proud dad, and she couldn't believe how quickly he had adjusted to the twins. It gave her an inkling of hope that the paradigm shift she wanted was possible.

Penny looked like she was deeply thinking about something trivial, with the way her lips were pursed and her eyebrows furrowed. She was gorgeous even when she didn't want to be—and she couldn't believe that she was her bestie! "I see, go slow, huh. Did you ever tell Sheldon that you wanted a relationship form him?"

"No, as if I did, he would only avoid the topic of a paradigm shift even more. The key is to let him figure it out by himself; he's a smart man, he can do it. That's why I drop him subtle hints about what I want from him," Amy winked at the blonde through the screen, hoping that the blonde would understand what she meant. "When we're watching tv, and there's a preview for those romantic shows that he abhors, I tell him that it would be nice to hold hands. Or to enter into emotionally mutual relationship that doesn't only consist of intellectual understanding."

"And did he get your hints?" The brunette shook her head, and Penny sighed. "Not really, as Sheldon has trouble grasping hints, but I'm working on it. I believe that if he gets hinted at often, he'll start understand. It's an experiment, as well as me trying to help him."

"Are you still planning on having children together?" What an odd question, Amy mused. Penny had asked this when they first met, and if she was asking it  _again_  it meant that Penny cared about her well being! How utterly heart warming! "We have yet to talk about it ever since Sheldon cancelled it due to Leonard's badgering. He was saying something about children being loved and not being shaped to become future overlords. I believe that his opinion of it relates back to his troubled relationship with his mother, and her saying that there's no guarantee that if you have kids that you're going to like them. It was straight from his mother's new book, and Sheldon even sent me a signed copy." Amy smiled at the blonde; when Penny returns, she was going to lend her the book so that she, too, could be enlightened by it's wise words. "Leonard has obvious parental issues, and thus Sheldon and I do not take it seriously. But it is still on hold."

Amy watched as Penny crossed her arms, her face still evident of thought. Oh, how she wished that she could take a peak into that beautiful, mysterious mind. "Just curious, but how is Sheldon with the twins?" What an absolutely new question that made her think about it herself. Based on what Sheldon texts her and what he says during the video calls, he was very fond of the twins. Like she said, he sounded like a proud father whenever the twins did something to mess up the others' work. Just the yesterday, he sent her a picture of Howard's invention that Andy had accidentally bumped off the table. Sheldon was shaping the toddlers to become the others' ultimate destruction. How cute. "Well, I must say that Sheldon is excellent with the twins." The blonde blinked, obviously unable to comprehend what she had just said. If she had not witnessed it herself, she would also be skeptical. "It is to my knowledge that Sheldon has a great dislike for children—except the hypothetical ones we talk about—and seeing him with the twins strongly contradicts that. Though, at first, I believe that Sheldon was not too fond of them, but after a while, they're the second most topic he discusses. When we have our daily conversations, he mentions them at least once, and he often sounds like a proud father bragging off to his friends. He talks about how the twins are quickly grasping everything that he teaches them, and how they are absolute terrors when it comes to the others' work. They ruin Leonard's research at least once every week, and I highly believe that it was Sheldon's instructions to do so."

The look that Penny had on her face was very confusing to Amy. It was one that made her look torn, and somewhat unsure of what she said. She didn't look like she was doubting her words—it was completely the opposite of that. She looked as if she just realized that she made a mistake and was starting to regret it. Like in those movies that Raj always make them watch where the woman finds out that the man she loved didn't do anything wrong, and she regrets whatever she did to get back at him for supposedly cheating on her. That was the closest thing she knew of that she could compare to the look Penny had, and she wondered what she was thinking about. "It also amazes me how quickly Sheldon warmed up to them. I'm sure you know that Sheldon strongly dislikes strangers, and he took a while before even considering me as a friend. I believe it took him a year before considering Leonard to be his friend—as with you. He said that it took a lot to accommodate you into his life, which was why he was very upset when you left. He also said that the three years of struggling were for naught. Unlike with the twins, who barely took a month to get him to like them. Seeing him with children he isn't even related to makes me sure that he would be a good father shall he push through with having children."

Distraught; that was the exact word that Amy used to define the expression Penny had, now. What was so upsetting about what she said? This was not good—she didn't want her bestie to be upset! But she couldn't see anything wrong with what she said. Was it because she said that it took a full year before Sheldon considered her as a friend? Would it make her feel better if she told her that it barely took her a minute to call her as a friend, and barely a day to be deemed her bestie? She didn't like seeing Penny frown—they'd only seen each other twice, but she could tell that Penny was a happy person, like her progeny. Bernadette pointed out that Penny was a very friendly and bubbly person, which was obviously inherited by Andy. Maddie was friendly, too, but the toddler was a bit less laid back than Andy, and was often seen reprimanding her twin for being noisy. It somehow reminded her of Sheldon; minus the friendly part, as Sheldon had his own way of doing things. Regardless of how off-putting their first encounter was, she had also warmed up to the twins. They were a bit too happy for her liking, but they were splendid children who never cried. Unlike most children of their age, they could talk and express themselves (even with a limited repertoire of words), seldom cried—and when they did it was just a few shedding of tears—and were very logical. They liked to ask questions, and they didn't forget the answers.

Back to her original trail of thought; Penny couldn't possibly be upset in knowing that the twins were very close to Sheldon! If that was so, then she wouldn't have left them with Sheldon and Leonard. If you asked her, Sheldon and Leonard were her own personal picks as top babysitters! Raj would probably spoil them too much, and Howard and Bernadette would most likely lose them like they did with Raj's dog, Cinnamon. The roommates were the only logical people to leave them with, and that was probably the reason why Penny chose them. If she wasn't upset about hearing that Sheldon and the twins have a good relationship, then what made her upset? This was making her upset, too, and she desperately wanted to make Penny feel better. Maybe, Penny had misjudged Sheldon, and thought that he would turn the twins into robots, or something incredulous. Then, due to her credible opinion of Sheldon being a good guardian, Penny has started to regret doubting Sheldon's abilities. That must have been it! But why would she be upset, if that  _was_  the case? "Bestie, are you upset? Did anything I say insult you in a way? Do you want me to dance foolishly in attempt to make you feel better? Would you like me to fly out to Paris and console you with a comforting hug? Just say it and I'll prepare everything I need."

Penny sent her a sad smile, and Amy felt her heart breaking. It was smile that was riddled with guilt, doubt and regret. "No, I'm okay, I just thought of something that I was wrong about." Her smile perked up slightly, and Amy found herself smiling as well. The blonde's smile was infectious, even when it wasn't a happy one. "I have one last question; what do you even see in Sheldon?"

The blonde was just being the over-protective friend that was skeptical of the other's potential boyfriend! Maybe, that was why Penny was upset—because she was unsure if Sheldon would be an okay boyfriend to her. What a great friend! This was another reason why she already loved the blonde. Although, they only met twice, she was so kind to her! She never treated her like a stranger or how other people treated her, and made her feel like she was an outcast. Penny—who was a very famous celebrity—treated her warmly, regardless of her superstar status. Most people would be creeped out by her actions when they first met, but Penny stuck through their entire conversation without even showing her a single sign that she didn't like her. That was why she liked the blonde so much, she was a great person and she strongly wished that they had met when they were younger. If they did, then she would have had a funner time growing up. But that didn't matter, because now she had the greatest friend she could have ever had (apologies to Sheldon and Bernadette) and she wasn't going to let her down in any way she could possibly do so.

"Sheldon is not as bad as most people think," she started off, sending the blonde a small smile of her own, "he's not used to reaching out to people, so you really have to make an effort to be friends with him. But when he starts considering you as his friend, he'll try to be a good one, even if he doesn't show it too often. When I first entered Sheldon's circle of friends, they grew wary of me as they didn't understand me, yet. And although, Sheldon and I reached an impasse when we both could not successfully refute each others' hypothesis, he still found a way for me to befriend the rest of the group. Raj by surveying his mind to see why he has selective mutism, Leonard by accompanying me to my cousin's wedding, Howard for our mutual love for Neil Diamond, and Bernadette for our general love of all things feminine. And now, he is connecting me with you." Amy's smile widened at the thought of how Sheldon introduced her to Penny, and how he widened his social circle. "He's not aware of what he does, and what he can do. But when he does do something good, it makes it all the more touching. He has a lot of cons that overthrows his pros, but when his pros come into effect, it makes you forget about the cons."

Penny was at a loss for words as she took in what Amy had said. She didn't expect Amy to say something so... deep. She had never looked at it that way, and it made her foolish to not have done so. Sure, Sheldon was one of the most obnoxious, arrogant, condescending person she had ever met, but it didn't mean that he was a bad person. She suddenly remembered how he took the blame from when Leonard lied to her about being unable to attend her version of Rent, and how he put up with her badgering of what to do in Age of Conan, and his attempt to bring her back into the dating scene. Then there was when he gave her that year worth supply of bath products, and the hug that made her cry; when he loaned her money when she couldn't pay rent, and when he helped her with her penny blossom business. And how could she forget the time when he drove her to the hospital, even though he couldn't drive, and eventually led to him being thrown in jail. But the latter was mainly his fault. She had been so unsure of her decision this past month that i stead of trying to befriend Sheldon again, she instead focused on finding more reasons why she should  _never_  tell him the truth. Which was a huge, gigantic mistake, because based on what she heard from all of them—Leonard, Raj, and now Amy—she was definitely wrong. If she had known then... then she wouldn't have put herself in so much trouble, now.

What a mess.

Well, looking back at the conversation she and Sheldon had before Amy arrived, it seemed like he had finally forgiven her. If he hadn't, then he would have ended the call when he wanted to, yet, he still chose to stay. She really missed the whack-a-doodle, and she only fully acknowledged it, now. Hearing the exact opposite of what you wanted to hear was really mind changing. Now, that she was clearly proven wrong, she'd have to make a decision. Sheldon deserved to know the truth, even if he didn't want to know it. Her decision was unfair to him, and Leonard was right from the very start. But, Amy said that things like these were crucial when it came to Sheldon. He had to discover the truth by himself—and she was  _so_  close to telling it, too! If she told him the truth when he wasn't ready, he might not be able to accept it, and reject it completely. She didn't want that, after they had all come this far. She was coming back to California in a month, and she had originally intended that if Sheldon didn't find out by then, she would never tell him, and they would all move on with their lives.

Leonard did not—at all—approve of that idea, and neither did Raj. But it was the most logical decision she had when Leonard first pitched his stupid idea. Now, she couldn't say that she was still thinking of sticking with the plan. It would be unfair to all of them if the truth didn't come out, and they all pretended that everything never happened. But she couldn't tell the truth unless he was ready for it! This was so frustrating! Maybe, this wouldn't be as confusing if she didn't run away. She wished she could picture what could have been if she told the truth way back when, but she couldn't. Even now, she couldn't envision what would happen once she returns. Each time she tried, it was just a blank; nothing came into mind, not even an imagination of what wouldn't happen. It was like something was stopping her from trying to overthink everything, because if she did, everything will spiral down into chaos. She didn't want that, and she agreed to Leonard's idea to make things right. Now, that she had finally matured, she always made sure that she knew what she was getting into, even if it be a simple thought. How would she be able to do that if the only thing she saw in this 'what if' scenario was an irritating blank. God, this sucked, but as the song goes; que sera, sera, whatever will be, will be. Stupid wrong life choices.

"Aun-teh Aye-mee!"

Amy turned towards the hall, leaving the blonde who was deep in thought to continue what she was doing. "Oh, hello children. You've awaken from your naps, I see."

Andy nodded, smiling widely beside Maddie who was frowning. Maddie hated getting woken up from a good sleep—which was each time she slept—and was often grumpy due to Andy wanting her to be awake when he was awake. Andy was not fond of sleeping. At all. "Who Aun-teh Aye-mee talk to?" The make toddler asked as he and his twin made their way towards their couches.

"Your mother," the brunette grabbed the laptop, rotating it to face the twins. "She has been waiting for you to wake up so she could say hi."

"Mommy!" Maddie exclaimed, suddenly snapping out of the sleepy daze she was in and stood in front of the laptop. "How mommy? Wat doing?" Andy stood beside his twin, placing a firm hand on his twins' shoulder to make her step away. "Maddie! Andy talk to mommy, too!"

"I do not understand why people as lazy as that insufferable delivery man are even tolerated and hired in a job where you are required to deliver the pizza on time, and at one's doorstep." Sheldon snarled as he entered the apartment, carrying the pizza box in one hand. "It was a good thing that I brought my phone with me or else I wouldn't have been able to call Giacomo's and complained about the horrible service boy." He placed the box beside the laptop before surveying the scene in front of him. "Oh, the twins are awake. Is Penny still online?"

"I'm still here, Sheldon," Penny called from the laptop, still facing the fighting twins who she really had to talk to when she gets back. They really shouldn't fight, ever. "I can smell pizza!"

Sheldon grabbed the necessary utensils and placed them in front of each of the diners, "Penny, I find that impossible as the internet has yet to develop a sense of smell." He took out the twins' sippy cups from the fridge and handed it to them before taking a seat on his spot.

"When will you ever grow a sense of humor?" The blonde hissed, shaking her head as Amy laughed, "oh, bestie, you are literally the funniest!" Sheldon scoffed at the two women as he sliced the twins' pizza into tiny pieces. Women. "Which reminds me, Sheldon," Penny said once the laptop was turned back to Sheldon, "why are my children wearing superhero shirts?"

The theoretical physicist raised an eyebrow, glancing at Andy and Maddie who were wearing a The Hulk and a She-Hulk shirt, respectively. There was absolutely nothing wrong with superhero appreciation, and it was much better than those hideous dresses and jumpers that Penny packed for the twins. "Think of it as the collection for the month," he smiled smugly at Penny's image on the screen. "These selections of mine are so much better than those things you consider as  _fashionable_."

"Oh no, you did not just insult my choice in fashion." Penny smirked, they were back to the old days when all of their conversations were full of banter; and that made her question her next decisions regarding Sheldon.

* * *

Sheldon stared at the paper, angling it slightly so that he could see the words properly.

_Probability_ _; 0.49999._

"I asked my colleague to run it three times just to make sure," Amy stoically said, handing him three more envelopes filled with test results. "And I must ask, how did you get the samples? You are very lucky that my colleague at the lab agreed to do it without any of the paperwork, needed. Well, that was mainly because Faisal funded the biochemistry department, as well, and they simply cannot say no to me."

"I have my ways," he answered, still staring at the paperwork. Sure, he found a way to get Leonard's and the twins' DNA samples, yet he couldn't manage to figure out who their father was. This was slowly turning into an alley with a dead end. "Are you sure that these results are to be trusted? Maybe, your friend slacked off and made a mistake?"

Amy peered at him through her glasses, an affronted look on her face. "Sheldon, although I do not care much for that colleague, I do not believe that they will give me faulty results that could possibly end their department's entire funding." The theoretical physicist sighed, placing the results back into the envelop. "It seems that you have reached an impasse with this theory you have. May I suggest your next unthought of move?"

"Sure, go ahead. This is a cul-de-sac of ideas, anyway."

"Why don't you just ask Penny? Isn't that the most logical way of finding out the truth? I truly do not understand why you are putting yourself to so much trouble, when there is already a possible solution." The neurobiologist brought out her car keys as they reached her car. "However, knowing you, you will not be satisfied with results that are just handed to you. Which is probably why you're running around in circles." She unlocked her car, and got inside, sending Sheldon a look. "As your friend, I highly suggest that you stop beating around the bush and get the answers you want. That is all, goodnight to you, Sheldon."

He sullenly nodded, waving as Amy drove back home before dumping the envelopes into a trashcan. So, he was wrong all along; Leonard was  _not_  the twins' father, and all of the hours he spent planning on how he was going to show Leonard that he knew the truth were in vain.

If they weren't Leonard's, then who's were they?


	8. Awarded Band-Aids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day of the coveted Emmy Awards have arrived and Sheldon and the gang are invited to a viewing party for Penny.

Sheldon leaned back against his spot—clearly bored—as Penny went on and on about a party he had no intention of attending.

"It's gonna be a private event, so you don't have to worry about anyone bothering you or the twins," the blonde informed them through their usual means of communication; Skype via the tv. "And the dress code isn't too strict, but don't wear anything too tacky."

Raj hummed, placing his bottle of beer down on the coffee table. "Is a sweater vest considered tacky?"

"Unless it's of a solid color, no design whatsoever, it is." Penny answered, causing the astrophysicist to sigh in response. If only she was actually there, then she wouldn't be worried about what her friends would look like. She would just buy the clothes they would wear, and everything would be fine. Although, if she was there with them, there wouldn't be a party at all, and she would be attending the  _Emmys_  like every excited sane person would. Sadly, there was just not enough time for her to fly back, get fixed and attend the awards show, then fly back to Paris to resume all of the lost time she had. Since she couldn't make it to the awards show, the  _Halfway There_  crew organized a viewing party for her, instead of attending the awards show. It was sweet and stupid at the same time, as if their show wins, only the executive producers would be there to accept the award. But, she guessed that they didn't care since  _Modern Family_  practically won every year. "You can bring anyone you want to bring, I already gave your names to my friends. Howard, you can bring Bernadette if you want to."

"Thanks, but there was a chipmunk virus that had a breakout and she had to get back to work." Howard said, a nervous smile on his face. "But, like they say, more viruses, more money."

Penny nodded, unsure if more viruses really was good for humanity. "Oh okay. Like I said, bring anyone you want to bring," her eyes shifted towards the silent physicist who looked like he wasn't even listening to her. They already restored the friendship they used to have (though she was unsure of which year of friendship) and it somehow bothered her how he seemed to not care. Ever since their little chat from last week he had become more friendly towards her. He now joined in whenever she called, and even engaged in minor banal chit chat when he felt like it. It made her feel as if nothing ever changed between them, and Amy was the happiest about it. Something about her bestie and her closest male friend becoming friends forever. Speaking of Amy, "Sheldon, you can bring Amy if you'd like."

"Why would I invite her to a party I have no intention of going to?" The sharpness of Sheldon's tone cut through all of their excitement of attending a party like a knife slicing through a stick of butter, causing the room to fall silent.

The theoretical physicist lifted an eyebrow as he surveyed his friends' reactions to what he said. Leonard choked on his licorice; Howard stared at him in disbelief, Raj took a long sip of his beer and the blonde on the television had her mouth slightly agape. What was so wrong about what he said? They all knew that he had zero interest in affairs such as that, so why did they look so shocked? He may have returned his friendship status with Penny, but that absolutely did not mean that he would engage in such frivolous events such as parties. A costume party, maybe, unless the people in attendance have no clue whatsoever on what the Doppler effect is. Parties were unnecessary and just plain downright stupid, in his opinion. He couldn't understand why his three colleagues became so enthralled with they idea of 'partying' with celebrities. Would Stan Lee be there? No. Would Leonard Nimoy be there? No. Would William Shatner be there? No. Therefore, there was no reason to go. "I ponder on why you look at me with such bafflement, but it does not make me change my mind. I am not going."

"Sheldon," Leonard whispered, gently tugging on his roommate's sleeve, "we're not going just because we want to see famous people—well, kind of—but we're really going so we can support Penny. You should, too."

Support Penny? Wouldn't watching her shows and movies and buying the magazines that featured her be a better way of supporting her rather than just going to a party that basically does nothing to better the lives of the common good? He failed to see how going to a party that had set up a screen that broadcasted the award show would be considered as a way of supporting their former neighbor. It would be more logical to wish her luck (he didn't believe in luck) than to attend that party. Considering the looks that his friends were currently giving him, his obvious refusal to join was not accepted. What did they want him to do? Lie and tell Penny that he would be happy to go? With the way the three men nodded, he guessed that they knew what he was thinking, and that he had no way of escaping this disastrous affair. Darn. "Penny, I highly believe that you will not miss my presence at that party and I am sure that there is a limited number of people who may join. Thus, I shall take one for the team and voluntarily not go."

"I'd be happier if you could go," Penny casually stated, making Sheldon frown. "I want all of you to go, actually. So, that you can meet some of my new friends, and so that the twins can go." Sheldon's gaze moved to the blonde toddlers who were mindlessly playing with their toys in front of the tv. "It's been a while seen my friends have seen the twins, and they've been bugging me about getting you guys to bring them to them."

"I'm sure that these three will be efficient enough to do the menial task of attending the party and taking the twins. I see no need for me there." Penny sighed heavily; you really cannot teach an old dog new tricks. It's not that she  _really_  wanted Sheldon to go, she was just hoping that along with their newfound friendship came a more supportive Sheldon. She always knew that Sheldon had little to no respect for her acting career, but with her rise to fame, she hoped that he would at least have a tiny speck of respect for it. She just wanted him to see that acting wasn't as bad as he thought, that was it. There was no other reason, seriously. "I'm not even sure how I'm even going to try and convince you to go. Knowing you, I could cry and beg all I want, and you still wouldn't join."

Sheldon smirked, crossing his arms once he realized that the others realized that trying to change his mind was futile. "I am glad that you're finally seeing it my way, Penny. In all the years that we've known each other, you have never shown signs of even being able to understand me. This may be the day that you finally understand that you are no match for me." He watched as Penny frowned, her eyes slightly narrowing at his words. She could get upset all she wants, but there really was no point of arguing with him once he made up his mind. It wasn't because he didn't want to 'support' the blonde, it was just his general dislike for frivolous activities. He wasn't doing it to spite her like what the others may think—he just really hated parties. There was really no point of having them (unless it was a viewing party or a costume one that consisted of fictional characters) especially when the people in attendance were those whom he had never ever met. He hated strangers, and they all knew that. He didn't care how many times Leonard was going to tell him that they would only be strangers if he didn't try to get to know them; he hated strangers. Period. "I applaud you for this wonderful achievement, Penny, and I wish you luck on that award, even though I don't believe in luck."

Raj shook his head at his former boss, turning to Leonard who shared the similar look of disgust. "Boy, he sure can be a gigantic ass when he wants to, can't he?" The experimental physicist chuckled, ignoring the look of hatred Sheldon sent each of them and turning back to the screen. "Don't mind him, Penny, he'll go. So, when you say tacky, what  _do_  you mean tacky? I can wear my red corduroy suit and the paisley shirt, right? That isn't tacky?"

The blonde gave him an apologetic smile, "sorry, sweetie, but it's considered tacky.

Why don't you and the others go out shopping, and I'll send you pictures of what you can wear?"

Sweetie, huh. Sheldon briefly recalled a time when Penny called Leonard  _honey_  to distinguish him from those she called sweetie. That was a little after the two upgraded their relationship to one that included carnal activities, before everything crashed and burned for the two of them which now led them to where they were today. It was somewhat nostalgic, but that was not the point that had captured his attention. It was the change of term of endearment that he only seemed to notice, now. Barely noticeable, yet so important. The simple change somehow supported the unthinkable hypothesis that Leonard and Penny no longer had any lingering feelings for each other. But it was more on Penny's part, rather than Leonard's. This proved that Penny now only saw Leonard as a friend, but said nothing about Leonard's feelings regarding the blonde. He could possibly still be head over heels obsessed with her like he used to be, or he could be in a stage where he had finally moved on. Sheldon hoped for the latter, as that would make his life much simpler. If that was how it was two years ago, then they wouldn't be stuck in an idiotic conversation about parties. Penny also wouldn't have to suddenly leave without any explanation.

That thought suddenly brought him to the conundrum that he was currently facing; the twins' father. Thanks to Amy—and her colleague—he had finally put the Leonard issue down to rest. His tiny roommate really wasn't the twins' father. For some reason, he wasn't happy about it yet he was also relieved. But, he was mad, as this only led him to another dead end in this experiment, and he had yet to find another street to walk on. He had been so sure that it was Leonard (though he had nearly zero evidence to back it up) and now that he was proven wrong, he no longer had any other ideas left. His mind had run dry, and even if Leonard did still have romantic feelings for Penny, it wouldn't solve anything. Thinking back to what Amy said to him, it would be wiser to just ask Penny—but, that was the normal person's way of finding out the truth. To wait for someone to get the answers then asking for it. He was a scientist (a proud one at that) and the logical way of getting answers was by finding it out by yourself. But all he needed was the apple that would fall on his head for him to realize gravity, or to notice the way water rose that would somehow lead to him discovering a method of determining the purity of gold. That was practically all he needed; that one nudge that would pave the way to a eureka.

However, he had no idea on when that breakthrough would come.

"—I actually have some formalwear packed for the twins," he heard Penny say to Raj, their conversation now about clothes, "there's a bunch of dresses for Maddie, so that won't be a problem, and you'll find a cute little grey suit jacket that will go great with any shirt. Plus, it would look great with the navy blue colored shorts I packed instead of matching it with the usual slacks. And you can practically get Andy to go for that casual-yet-formal look that I am totally envisioning right now!"

"I think that would look great!" Raj chirped, looking at the three silent men in approval before grinning at the blonde on the screen. "I'm thinking of a grey-cream-navy blue combination? Then Maddie can wear something with the same color as Andy's outfit!"

Maddie paused from making her doll eat dinner as her ears picked up the mention of her name. She placed her doll on the tiny seat then tilted her head to face the adults, "say Maddie name?"

Andy, who was playing with a toy car halted to join in with his twin. "Andy name, too?" He scanned the four adults sitting on the couch before turning to the tv that showcased his mother's face. "Mommy?"

"Oh, I forgot to tell them about the party," Penny mumbled, slightly frowning. "You're going to go and see Uncle Gregg and Aunt Bailey tomorrow." The blonde watched the twins' faces break into a wide grin at the mention of her two friends. "You and your uncles are going to attend a party, does that sound fun?"

Maddie's eyes widened, "dwink wine? Maddie dwink wine, too?"

"Wine?" Leonard asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, it was a few months back when I had to attend this party for one of the executive producers, and I couldn't bring them with me." Penny nodded, chuckling softly at the memory. It was about a month before she left for France, and everyone from the show was invited to the executive producer's fiftieth birthday. Since it was held at a fancy restaurant—that she still couldn't pronounce the name of—she couldn't just bring the twins to a party full of snooty people. So, she called up their usual babysitter to watch over the twins. Then, when she was about to wear her heels, Maddie barged in wearing one of her cocktail dresses (that looked like a  _really_  long floor gown on the toddler) complete with jewelry and accessories. Andy was there, too, but he didn't seem as desperate to come like his twin. When she said that they couldn't come, Maddie started crying and saying that she wanted to drink wine with her mom. She was tempted to bring them along, but she really couldn't. Instead, she stayed a little bit longer to drink grape juice with them before going to the party and she knew that the twins were happy about it. "Maddie started crying when I said that she couldn't go, she kept saying that she wanted to drink wine with me. Now, each time she hears the word party, she associates it with wine; even if she doesn't know what it is."

Maddie blinked, processing what her mother said before smiling when she realized that they were going to an  _actual_  party—with  _wine._  "Dwink wine, too? Pah-tee mean wine! Maddie go to pah-tee!"

"The twins' vocabulary has really expanded," Penny noted, noticing the way Sheldon nodded proudly from his spot. "And yes, Maddie, you're going to go to a party, but you get to drink kiddie wine like last time, okay?"

Andy nodded then twisted his body to face the men, "Sedon go to pah-tee, too?"

"Sedon dwink wine!" Maddie chirped, "Sedon gonna wike wine! It deh-ishas!"

Sheldon frowned at the happy toddlers; their mother would never give them actual wine, and must have given them grape juice. How foolish. "No, I am not going to the party, as I have much better things to do." The happy expressions fell from the blondes' faces as if they were eggs dropped from the top of a building. "Though, I do wish all of you have a great time, and that your mother wins. And that none of you bother me."

Maddie furrowed her eyebrows up at the physicist—this simply could not do! This was the first (ever) party she was going to, and she wanted everyone to be there, as her mother could not. And when she says everyone, she means  _everyone_. No exceptions. This was a big thing for her; she would see her Uncle Gregg and Aunt Bailey and all of the other nice adults from her mother's workplace, and she would get to drink wine! Andy wasn't as ecstatic as she was, but she knew that her brother would agree that Sheldon  _had_  to be there. The three of them could drink wine together! She wished their mother could come as well, but she was far away, making a movie. Maybe she could save her some wine! Her Uncle Leonard had once said that their mother loved wine, so she was sure that she would get sad at not getting to drink wine with all them. Sometimes, she and Andy wished that they could all be together, instead of just talking from the tv. It would be much funner, and she missed their mother greatly.

She wasn't sure, but she thought that their mother would appreciate it if Sheldon went to the party with them. She had understand enough of the adults' conversation to know that this party was for their mother, and that it was for cheering her on for something. Their mother would be happy if Sheldon would cheer her on! While drinking wine! And they could wear nice clothes like dresses! While drinking wine! It would definitely be fun, and she didn't care if Andy did not agree with her—she had to get Sheldon to come along. Her Uncle Gregg and Aunt Bailey would love to meet him, she was sure about that. Then, once they have all become friends with each other, they could all hang out together! Like when their mother hadn't left, except with the addition of; Sheldon, Uncle Leonard, Uncle Raj, Uncle Howard and Aunt Bernadette. And maybe, Aunt Amy.

"Sedon hasta go to pah-tee! Sedon, Maddie and Andy dwink wine, too! At pah-tee." The toddler sent Sheldon a  _look_ ; one that was demanding—not even a little bit considerate—ordering that he go to the party, whether he liked it or not. It made the three men all shudder in fear (Penny couldn't see it as Maddie's back was to her) and Sheldon narrowed his eyes at her. He had seen that look from the toddler many times before, and she had the nerve to do it to  _him_ , now. With a small, huff, he straightened his back and sent the girl the  _exact_  same one she was sending him. He heard and ignored the gasp that Raj emitted, solely focusing on making the toddler's facade crumble. Suddenly, something moved from a spot that was no longer in his line of sight, and he found Andy in front of him. His tiny arms were folded in front of his chest; his eyebrows downcast, his light blue eyes (that were slowly turning green with each week that passed) sharp, and his mouth set in a grim line.

At that moment—he saw himself in the toddler, which made his eyes widen, and made his throat run dry. It was faint, but he saw a striking similarity in the way that he stood his ground. It wasn't much, but it was there, and he briefly wondered how much exactly he had rubbed off on the twins.

"Fine, I'll go," he sneered as the toddlers' cold front disappeared and was replaced by happy grins and cheering. Let this be the last time that he ever gets bested by them. "But do not expect me to exchange pleasantries with anyone, and I surely will not enjoy myself."

Maddie clapped her hands as she and her brother turned to face the tv, "mommy! Sedon go! Mommy happy?"

Penny chuckled softly at her children then at the grumpy theoretical physicist who was mumbling inaudible things to himself. Leave it to the twins to get Sheldon to do something he didn't want to do, like a dirty sock hidden where he would never find it. "Yeah, I'm happy. So, Raj, I'm going to send you pictures of what you guys can wear—and Sheldon, don't give me that look. I promise it won't be your definition of looking like a clown." Unlike before, she now considered the memory of suit shopping with Sheldon as one of her favorites. Even with how he glared at her at the mention of clothes shopping, she didn't find herself at all bothered. Things were going well, and she hoped that they'd someday look back and laugh about all of this.

* * *

Four men entered the restaurant, each carrying a different expression from the other as they stood in front of the podium.

The first man—who looked super foreign—wore a plain dark green sweater over a light gray collared shirt and dark pants, looked the most optimistic of them all. The second man wore dark rimmed glasses, a striped blue button down shirt and grey pants along with a confused look that he directed to everyone as he scanned the vicinity. The third man, who was the shortest of them all, looked smug as he adjusted his purple and pink striped tie that sat atop a powder pink dress shirt which he matched with a surprisingly compatible brown woolen cardigan and dark slacks. The three of them looked okay (general term of the word) and even looked like they fit in with the various dressed guests that filled the restaurant who were roaming about to talk with anyone who was famous, which was most of them.

However, the person that stuck out the most was the tallest one of four. He looked like he absolutely  _hated_  the fact that he was at the restaurant, with the way he frowned. It was like the only expression he knew was to frown. But that wasn't what made him stand out—it was his outfit. He was wearing a dark grey blazer over a pastel green dress shirt on top of tan colored slacks and what may be the ugliest tie the world had mistakenly ever seen. It was a dark purple color, with various colorful superheroes spread across the fabric that would give anyone who would see it a migraine. It was hideous, and was the only thing that screamed I-don't-belong-here, aside from that pessimistic frown on his youthful face. It was a shame, really, had he ditched the barf-worthy tie and the kill-me-now look, he was actually pretty cute.

With a huff, the irritable spectator marched over to the tall man and proceeded to yank off his tie.

Sheldon's eyes widened as the dark haired stranger started loosening his limited edition tie, causing him to secure his hold on Maddie as he bolted away from her. "Stop touching me!" He shrieked when the woman tugged on his tie again, "who are you?!" He extended a hand out to separate him and Maddie from the woman, and he saw dark green eyes slightly lifting to glare at him. He surveyed the appearance of the woman; she was about 5 feet and 9 inches tall, had jet black hair that made her even paler than she already was, and had a certain aura of evil surrounding her. She was to be in his list of people who were not to be trusted. "Don't make me call security."

The dark haired woman snorted, raising an eyebrow as she jabbed a pale finger on his tie. "That, must be the ugliest tie I have ever seen."

Howard sidled over to Leonard and whispered, "I told you it was an ugly tie." Leonard sighed, furtively glancing at the aforementioned tie, "we can't do anything, Sheldon already wore it. It's impossible to get it back from him." The three men nodded, recalling the memory of their shopping trip from the previous day. Penny had sent them the exact names of what each of them were supposed to wear, and they all tried to strictly follow what she told them. The only person unhappy with what she dictated was Sheldon who complained on how he would look like an act in a circus with what Penny wanted him to wear. Personally, they all thought that the picks Penny made were pretty snazzy, especially the outfit that she chose for Sheldon. Like always, Sheldon did not share the sentiment, and started to protest about him looking stupid as he exited the dressing room. Then as they were walking around the department store, Sheldon spotted the superhero tie at the teens section. It was either buy the hideous tie—though, the three men all secretly wanted one, too—or allow him to wear the equally as hideous plaid suit that he normally wore. They contacted Penny, and though she protested, they bought the tie, anyway.

Raj sighed softly, he had forgotten to drink some alcohol. Moving in between Howard and Leonard, he lowered his voice so that the dark haired stranger wouldn't hear him. "That's Bailey Mckenzie, she plays irritable badass Katie, the human that Jane—Penny's character—meets and eventually lives with, and they become best friends." Raj, unlike Howard and Leonard, actually watched  _Halfway There_ , and like the rest of the world, he loved the show with just one season. Not just cause he was friends with Penny, but because it was a really great show. Halfway There was about Jane (Penny's character) who died and was given a second chance at life, as long as she helps a list of people who the Heaven's commander accidentally encoded to go on the wrong path. If Jane corrects all of the mistakes successfully, she would return to the last ten seconds of her life and would be allowed to avoid the accident that killed her. Jane, who is dead-set on getting back to being alive, agrees and she is sent back to Earth and accidentally meets Katie (Bailey's character) who is a depressed, down on her luck woman that allows Jane to live with her.

Jane thinks that they met by accident, when really, she was destined to meet Katie had she lived from the accident. The show's running storyline was that everything happened for a reason, and the two girls' friendship was an example of that. The two of them were complete opposites; Jane, who is bubbly yet logical, was a successful lawyer with a perfect romantic life but never had any family, while Katie, who is irritable, serious and depressed, was an unsuccessful artist who always had trouble with love but had a loving family that was miles away. They immediately click, and become the best of friends. Then it is revealed (to the audience, but not the characters) that Jane's fiancé was actually only using her, and that her parents actually died protecting her from a car crash, while Katie's brother was actually the one blocking Katie from success by badmouthing her to art critics. Unbeknownst to both of them, they were chosen as their traits complemented each other, and that they would be great as partners in trying to help the other lost souls. Each episode started with the future that Penny had to change, then the present, the past that made the episodic character do something bad, then how Penny and her friends helps the character and then the future that Penny changes. "She's actually Penny's best friend in real life, and you'll usually see her, Penny and Gregg Wilkes together."

Leonard turned to the astrophysicist, keeping the level of his voice down. "Who's Gregg Wilkes?" Raj's dark eyes scanned the restaurant, trying to look for the actor. "He's also a lead in the show, and plays the silent yet critical half-angel observer, Charlie, who has to keep tabs on Penny's character and on Bailey's character who got dragged into the mess. They're a great trio, and seeing the chemistry they have, I'm okay with Charlie ending with either of them." Charlie (Gregg's character) was a half human-slash-half angel who was tasked to observe the angels in training as he was not allowed to be an actual angel. After the mistake that happens up in the Heaven command room, he is sent to Earth to help Jane fix the mistakes. Charlie's character usually is the one opposing both girls with his critical, condescending and snarky ways—which reminded him a lot of Sheldon—whenever Jane did something wrong, or whenever Katie had ideas on how to help the next person. But really, Charlie was only like that because he is torn between whether or not he is an angel or a human, which was why he is usually rude to the two, and his general dislike for humans. But somewhere around the sixth episode, he starts to soften up to the girls and slowly sees that humans are okay. All three characters had great chemistry with each other, which was probably why they became close friends. "But, in real life I want Gregg and Bailey to end up together, because Charlie and Katie are the best—Jane and Charlie are okay, but I think Jane will meet someone else—but Gregg's gay, which is such a shame cause he has great bone structure and is a really heartbreakingly handsome dude." Instinctively, both Howard and Leonard stepped away from Raj, and moved towards Bailey, Sheldon and the twins.

"Aun-teh Bay-wee!" Andy chirped from behind Sheldon, toddling over to the tall dark haired lady. He was wearing the discussed outfit; a grey blazer over a cream colored shirt over a pair of navy blue shorts. "Dis Andy!

Bailey tore her menacing gaze from the dastardly tie and shifted it towards the blonde toddler sitting comfortably on the tie-wearer's arm, then to the other one who was waving happily at her. She had been so stupid to focus her attention on that stupid tie, and had forgotten all about the only children she could tolerate! Taking a step back; she roughly yanked the tie from the man's neck, effectively removing it from his outfit before tossing it into the nearby trash bin. God, that stupid thing had been getting on her nerves ever since she laid eyes on it. Now, that it was gone, she could feel herself relax as she took in the features of the man in front of her. He now looked more grown up, and was actually okay. Lifting the scowl on her face, she smiled at her favorite infants. "Maddie, Andy, it's been so long since I've last seen you!" She crouched down slightly, lifting Andy to her hip. "Andy you've grown so much! You're heavier, taller and you're looking more and more like your mother!"

"Wat abaht Maddie?" The blonde toddler asked from Sheldon's arm. She was wearing a green sailor dress that matched perfectly with the color of the man carried her's shirt. "No happy to see Maddie?"

The dark haired actress smiled softly at the blonde toddler. Oh, how she loved these two kids! She normally didn't like children of any age (at all) but when it came to these two, her heart melted like butter. When she first met them on set, she had thought that she wouldn't warm up to them. She was a hundred and twenty percent wrong. Barely a month of the show later, she rivaled Gregg with how much she spoiled them. When she didn't have a scene—which was rare—she would be at the makeshift daycare that the crew made that was right next to the main set which was her character's living room. Only Penny and Gregg knew that she enjoyed playing with the toddlers, and it was the greatest stress ball she had. What her best friends didn't know, was that she also taught them whatever dramatic scenes that they were going to do for the week. Once the twins picked up the lines, she would film them doing the lines, then she would get them on tape and forever treasure how great she is as a teacher. Just don't tell Penny or Gregg that.

"I'm especially happy to see you Maddie," she leaned over to plant a kiss on Maddie's cheek, ignoring the glare that the tall man sent him as she stepped closer to him, "I'm happy to see both of you. The last time I saw the two of you was when your mom was still in California." She stepped back, adjusting Andy on her arm before searching for her best friend, finding him talking to one of the staff. "Gregory! Hey, Gregory! Penny's friends are here!"

There was something about Bailey Mckenzie that Gregg Wilkes never understood. Why was it that such an irritable, rude, bad tempered woman somehow manage to yell like a wanted person getting chased down by the police yet talk like some fictional woman plucked out from eighteenth century set movies on most days? Running a hand through his silky light brown hair and brushing it upwards, he said goodbye to the second unit director before spinning on his heel and striding towards his dark haired co-star. There on his best friend's arm was Penny's cute little son, and behind her, were four men and Penny's cute little daughter. They must be the friends that the blonde was talking about when she called in to say hello. He had to admit, he was expecting different looking people—not in the bad way—than the ones standing in front of him. He had seen all of them before, in pictures Penny had in her dressing room, but seeing them all dressed up made them look like entirely different people. Especially, the tallest one who was carrying Maddie. Based on what Penny said about each of them, this one had to be Sheldon. And Penny told them  _a lot_  about him. "Hi, I'm Gregg Wilkes, Penny's co-star. You must be Penny's old friends, am I right?"

Leonard tilted his head to look up at the tall, debonair-looking man who had great styled light brown hair, dazzling hazel eyes and a charming smile. Raj was right, he really  _was_  heartbreakingly handsome, and he meant that in a heterosexual way of looking at him. "Um, I'm Leonard Hofstadter, this is Raj Koothrappali and Howard Wolowitz, and that's Sheldon Cooper. We're Penny's friends."

Sheldon clucked his tongue at his roommate, "it's  _Doctor_  Sheldon Cooper." His eyes shifted towards the dark haired woman, "you've already harassed me yet I still do not have a name to put down on the information sheet of the complaint I am going to file against you." The tall man dramatically gasped turning to his friend and lightly smacking the back of his hand against her arm. "Bailey! You are ever so rude, you didn't introduce yourself to Penny's friends!"

The dark haired witch—Sheldon's opinion—huffed, readjusting Andy on her hip. "I don't need to introduce myself to those who have horrible tastes." She pointed a slender finger at the trash can, making the four men (minus Sheldon) follow the direction of her finger. "Gregg, do you see that ugly thing poking out of the trash can? That was the tie he was wearing." Gregg shuddered at the sight of the said garment. "Had I not been so kind as to take it from him and dispose of it properly, he would have looked like an idiot." With a small smirk she turned to Sheldon who was glaring at her, "and my name is Bailey Mckenzie. I'm Penny's actress friend that can see ugly clothing from a mile away. The next time you wear something as hideous as that, I'm charging you for my fashion services."

"It's not ugly!" Sheldon hissed, glancing at his now dirty tie then back at the infuriating woman. "That is a limited edition DC superheroes tie that you cannot find anywhere!"

"You can find it in that trash can," Bailey sneered, causing the physicist to get even angrier. "There isn't anything more limited edition than a uglier than crap tie that belongs in the trash that currently resides in actual trash." She gave Sheldon a wide smile, "go on, I dare you to get it from that trash full of god-knows-what and place it back on your body. Do it, and I'll even allow you to lacerate my soul with it."

Sheldon peered down at her with as much venom as he could, "I don't like you."

"On the contrary, I think we'll get along fine," Bailey remarked, winking up at him.

Gregg, having had enough of Bailey teasing Penny's genius friend, placed a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Okay, I think that's enough teasing, Bailes," he said, sighing as the dark haired actress turned to him. "Why don't we first allow them inside the actual party before you go and start teasing Dr. Genius over there." If he didn't interrupt Bailey, it was possible for a bloodbath to occur, if what Penny said was true. Well, there would only be a bloodbath if the said genius really could blow up minds, but as that was impossible, it would just be Bailey being downright rude. Bailey always had a knack for being snarky, and Sheldon was just a target waiting to get shot. Instead of a fun night supporting Penny and her possible win with her friends from before she was famous, their night would turn sordid, where Bailey would pick on all four men while somehow managing to teach the twins their new scripts. To put it simply, it would be a nightmare. "Look! There's shrimp cocktails, and pudding! The twins love pudding!"

"You like pudding?" Sheldon asked, raising an eyebrow at the toddler on his arm.

Maddie nodded, "Maddie wike choc-et wike Andy, but Andy wike van-iwah mostest."

Andy gasped from Bailey's arms, "Andy wike choc-et, too!"

"Maddie say dat!" The blonde toddler sent her twin an annoyed look before turning back to Sheldon. "Eat pudding, peas?"

"Only after you eat dinner," Sheldon mirrored the frown on both of the twins' faces, and was roughly bumped on the shoulder by Bailey. "Oh hush, they can eat all the pudding they want!" She handed Andy to Gregg before grabbing Maddie from Sheldon, "I'll watch over them, so you can just go and be boring somewhere else." She gave him a mocking grin then pulled Gregg into the restaurant, leaving the three men confused at what happened, and Sheldon even more annoyed with the actress.

"She's hot," commented Howard.

"I need a drink," added Raj.

"I definitely  _do not_  like her," snarled Sheldon as they followed after Penny's friends. "She reminds me of Missy. I don't like that."

Leonard chuckled, lightly patting Sheldon's shoulder as he walked beside him. "Get used to her, cause the party hasn't even started yet."

* * *

"So," Gregg drawled as he and Bailey approached the lonesome man who appeared to hate his surroundings, "you're a physicist, huh?"

Sheldon scowled at the two intruders who were adding to his headache from the blaring music. The other three and the twins had flocked towards the buffet where Raj grew fascinated with the gigantic shrimp that they were serving. He, too, liked the rare sized shrimp, but not to the extent that it was the only dish he ate like what his friends were doing. Instead of standing uncomfortably in front of a long buffet table, hogging all of the seafood, he chose to separate himself from his friends and envelop the momentary peace that he would get by sitting alone at the table. He somewhat wished that they leave the twins with him—as he was sure that they were spoiling them with any food they pointed at—but he was glad for the alone time. It allowed him to measure the size of shrimp and decide which order he'd eat them without Leonard telling him to 'cut it out.'

Which proved to be wrong, as now it was Penny's acting friends who were bothering him.

"I am a theoretical physicist, yes, that is correct." He snidely answered, placing the largest shrimp down on his plate. "Might I ask, what is your business talking to me? I do not find any possible topics we could discuss."

Bailey raised an eyebrow while Gregg had a small grin as they took seats in front of him. "We want to get to know all of you, and we decided to start with you," Gregg nodded his head at Bailey who carelessly shrugged. "Yeah, what Sparkly said. We both agreed that you were probably the most interesting amongst the four of you, so congratulations." Bailey reached over to his plate, snatching a piece of shrimp and tossing it into her mouth like it was popcorn. "You're the cooler of the ice packs. You should feel flattered; it's not everyday that I deem someone interesting."

Sheldon threw her a look of irritation before pushing his plate full of shrimp towards the annoying woman. With her touching the shrimp, the chances of the others getting her germs heightened. How Penny managed to tolerate this woman, he didn't know. And he didn't want to know. "Yes, the flattery is implied. I don't understand why the two of you really chose to bother me, but based on what I observed about  _her_ , she enjoys sadism. And it is not hard to see that I do not want to be here, nor want to talk to her." He watched the dark haired wench smirk triumphantly before eating the shrimps that used to be his. "So, what sort of banal chit chat shall we engage in, friends of Penny?"

Gregg held back a sigh; Sheldon was definitely how Penny described him to be. He was a bit arrogant, cocky, condescending, selfish, short tempered, and was kind of rude, but compared to Bailey, he was a piece of cake to get along with. Penny told them many stories about the beautiful minded genius; good and bad ones, and a few... secrets that she only shared with him and Bailey. Based on the vivid descriptions Penny gave them about him, he kind of felt as if he knew the man as much as Penny did. He was turning out to be everything that Penny said he would be, and it was great to finally meet him in person. Like a favorite character straight out of a book coming back to life. He and Bailey never told Penny, but out of the four men she always talked about, Sheldon was their favorite. Bailey didn't show it much, but when Penny told them that they would finally meet the infamous geniuses, she grew excited and was secretly happy to finally be able to meet Sheldon.

In the short year and half that they'd known Penny, they'd heard  _everything_  there was to know about her story. From how she grew up in a farm to the day that she left Pasadena, and up to went to France for her film. Penny had the most colorful story they had ever heard, and at first, they had both thought that she was making everything up. But when she showed the pictures (and a few silly videos of Sheldon) they realized that she had not been lying and that all of her stories were true. Penny often told them about Sheldon; his crazy antics, his odd persona, the memories they shared, and it was obvious that the blonde greatly missed the man. Mainly because she still went out to meet with the other three guys, and never had a chance to meet with this one. The two of them never questioned the relationship between the blonde and the man from her past, as the both knew what happened between them that was kept as a secret locked a million times over. She only told them about the incident  _once_ , and they never talked about it again.

So, when Penny told them that she was going to meet with him again after two years, they each held back a sob. They were never sure if there was anything romantic between the two former friends, but they knew that they were great friends. Episode number eleven was about two best friends that got separated due to a fight, and the girl died when they were about to meet again. They never told Penny, but they both saw her cry when she watched the guest actors do the future scene where the living best friend came to the funeral and regretted fighting with her. Bailey theorized that the storyline for the episode might have reminded Penny of her and Sheldon's seemingly irreparable relationship that grew more and more tainted over the years. She did perk up when the writers revealed the final scene of the episode where the girl didn't die, and somehow, she and the best friend met each other again and forgave each other. Even Bailey spared a few tears at the scene while Penny tried to hold back hers. The episode probably gave Penny (and them) hope that she would one day mend her friendship with Sheldon, and that chance came when she went to France.

Since Sheldon was here, at the party for Penny—it meant that they somehow fixed their friendship. They almost cried at that; which was why their entire focus was to personally befriend Sheldon, and pry out his side of the story from him. Cause they loved gossip, and meddling in Penny's personal life. The other three scientists could wait.

"Well, why don't you tell us something about yourself, then we'll go," Gregg suggested, glancing at Bailey for approval then turning back to the solemn looking man.

A pair of sharp blue eyes narrowed and Gregg cleared his throat. "Alright, I'll go first! I'm Gregg Wilkes—you already knew that—thirty years old, and I work alongside Penny and Bailey in Halfway There. We all met when they screened the three of us to run lines together before the show started," he raised a brow in thought, "which was about a year and a half ago. Hmm... personal information, I have a boyfriend, he owns this fine establishment and we've been together for five years, now." He turned to the dark haired woman who was frowning, "that's all I got. It's your turn, Bailey."

Bailey wrinkled her eyebrows; obviously unhappy with the baton passing. "I don't really see the need of this, but since Sparkly says so, I'll ride along." Her mouth moved to the side before changing into a deep frown. "The name's Bailey Mckenzie, twenty-four years old and based on what Sparkly said, you should know my job. I've never taken a relationship seriously—practically all flings—and I really have no plans on having one," she paused, raking her eyes across the physicist's facial features. "Maybe, if you pack on twenty pounds of muscle, I guess I could give you a shot. Penny might not like that, though."

She sent the physicist one of her famous vexing smirks that caused Sheldon to scowl, and Gregg to sigh. It wasn't that she was flirting with him, she just loved messing with everyone. The physicist wasn't much of her type, but he would be okay—though, Penny would flip a table if she ever found out that she had even considered Sheldon as cute. Had he not worn and defended that disgustingly hideous tie (and if he wasn't the person who he was) she really might consider flirting with him. Sadly, Gregg would tell her that the two if them were too much alike that they would be the dullest couple in the world, and that Penny wouldn't be happy. The latter was the one she agreed with; Penny often showed her disapproval of her way of treating men—she never really had a serious relationship—and would only allow that idea if she actually wanted to do things the right way. Which, she did not, and so she'll just settle with annoying him like an older sister does to her little brother. Though, she was positively sure that the physicist was a lot older than her.

But really, even with the way he was glaring at her as if she was Germany and he was the occupied Poland, he seemed like an okay person. In fact, looking at him was like looking at a mirror; they were both tall, had dark hair and light colored (hers was a darker shade of green, but it still counted as light) eyes, were cunning and brilliant in their own ways. And if there was a topic she found more interesting than herself (narcissism) it was people who were similar to herself. Which was funny as she was already interested in meeting the infamous whack-a-doodle that Penny always talked about, and seeing that they were totally alike, made her interested in befriending him even more! She would never tell either Penny or Gregg this, but she really wanted Sheldon and Penny to be friends again. The stories she told about him really interested her, and she always loved the Sheldon stories like a kid liked bedtime ones. She always found it amazing how the character in the blonde's other stories always seemed robotic and insouciant, but once you heard the ones that centered around him and the blonde, you'd see that he wasn't as stoic as he seemed. Which was why she looked forward to meeting him the most. She really wanted to see if everything that Penny said was real, and so far, it was safe to say that she was going to like the quirky physicist.

"Other than that, there really isn't anything important left to say to you," she cooly said before putting another shrimp in her mouth. She never told Gregg (she actually never tells anyone anything) but she loved the food served here. "I've practically told you more than I've ever told anyone that isn't Penny or Gregg, so spill, Mr. Smart."

Sheldon's scowl was so deep that Gregg swore that his eyebrows were touching. He absolutely  _did not_  like this woman. Not only did he remind him of Missy—except a bit more atrociously snarky—but she also had the nerve to mock him! Gregg, he found oddly charming and comely, but he definitely could not say the same about her. Maybe, just maybe, he could shape her into a more likable person via positive reinforcement such as giving chocolates. He'd have to check back on that one. "I am not really required to respond to this, but as I am sensing that this is partly social protocol, I shall comply." He sent the dark haired woman another hateful look before taking a deep breath. "I am currently a theoretical physicist at Caltech, and am thirty-one years old. Penny used to live in the apartment in front of us, and that's how I became associated with her. I also detest romance, romantic relationships and anything concerning it and still question humanity's need of finding love. You should also remember my name as I will soon win the Nobel, but other than that, I do not see any other information that I should share with the two of you."

"Based on that penultimate statement, Bailey, I gotta say—it's like talking to a male version of you." Gregg remarked, slightly shuddering at the similarities (aside from the physical attributes) between the physicist and his best friend. I.e.; narcissism, general hate for humankind, general hate for the notion of love, condescension, arrogance, insouciance and pessimism. He always flinched at the idea of two Baileys, but it wasn't just an idea, as it has been proven to be real. Bailey and Sheldon were like long lost twins—it was scary and hilarious at the same time. That must have been why Penny had an instant liking to Bailey (who hates  _everyone_ ), as she reminded her greatly of Sheldon. "But, really, it's nice to finally meet you Sheldon."

Bailey nodded in agreement, "true. It's impossible to not find you interesting when all of Penny's stories were about you."

"Penny talks about me?" The two actors nodded. "Favorably?"

"Some were good, some were bad," Gregg answered, pushing the stray strands of hair upwards. He hated it when even a strand of hair was out of place. "But don't worry, the bad ones were hilarious, and the good ones were just downright interesting."

"I am not sure what exactly those were, but I have no intention of knowing." Sheldon hissed, crossing his arms to match his frown. "Penny enjoys the hobby of gossiping; it doesn't surprise me that she would do so with my life, as I am so interesting."

Gregg raised an amused eyebrow, leaning towards Bailey, "are you sure that you're not twins separated at birth?" The dark haired woman smirked at her friend then to her supposed long lost sibling. "Maybe, if twins could have a seven year age gap. So, Sheldon, I heard you and Penny parted on bad terms. Are you two okay, now? Cause I gotta admit, I'm really curious to find out. The two of you sounded like the best of friends right before she disappeared without even a measly goodbye."

"Penny and I have resumed our friendship," the physicist stoically answered, that emitted a soft shrill from Gregg, and caused Bailey to slam her man hands onto the table in shock. They were too overdramatic. "I am not sure as to why your reactions are so exaggerated, but the statement still stands. We are friends, and I have already forgiven her for her disappearance. And as you can see—or heard from Penny—I have even allowed her progeny to temporarily reside at my humble abode." Sheldon watched as Bailey sent a look to Gregg, which he somehow understood and responded with a look of his own. They had their own secret language that only involved the eyebrows and the eyes. He might consider creating one of his own that he could teach Leonard that they could use shall they ever be kidnapped by the secret service. Fascinating.

"Oh yeah, I forgot to ask about that," Bailey piped in, with uncharacteristic perkiness, "what do you think about  _Penny's_  progeny?" Gregg enthusiastically nodded, flashing him a toothy smile. "You know, Andy and Maddie; blonde, blue eyed, smart and might be the cutest children on the face of the planet?"

"They are satisfactory," he absentmindedly mused, his former frown faltering into a thoughtful look. "They remind me of Penny, yet they are nothing like her. They're also making huge progress in development and I am proud to say that I was a big factor in that." He smirked as he scanned through all of the great things that he had done for the twins, and all in just one month. Their vocabulary was certainly vastly expanding, they no longer relied on a bottle to quench their thirst—and now had a better appreciation of one of the greatest fictional works of all time; Star Wars. Just the other day, Maddie was babbling on and on about how she wanted to meet Darth Vader (or Dat Bedah) and Andy was showing great interest in Luke Skywalker. He was incredibly proud that even at such a young age, they were able to see why Star Wars was so great. His future progeny would probably grow up in the newer Star Wars generation, and so he would instead treasure the time time that the only Star Wars he could show learning minds were the original series of movies and a couple of Lego movies. Times were changing pretty quickly. "Other than that, I have nothing else to tell you."

"You really love talking to us, huh?" Bailey quipped, finishing off the final shrimp.

"I detect that that is sarcasm," the physicist stated, his eyes shifting to the actress, "and if it is not, the only thing I can tell you is that I really do not like you." With a huff, he stood and adjusted his blazer. "I'm afraid you must excuse me, as I must get a newer plate of food." He sent them a small nod before turning and walking over to the buffet table where his friends were.

Bailey grinned as she turned back to her best friend, "I like him! He definitely lives up to expectations, doesn't he?"

Gregg chuckled, sensing that the actress wasn't lying. "True. Well, we can catch up with him, later. I have a strong feeling that we'll be seeing him again." He glanced over his shoulder and saw that the screen was now showing the start of the Emmys. "We better entertain the rest of the people—the show is starting." He stood from his seat, helping his friend stand up before offering his arm to her. "Shall we cross our fingers that blondie wins?"

The dark haired actress let out a small, amused laugh as she linked arms with him. "We both know that she doesn't need luck." They smiled at each before laughing all the way to the crowd.

* * *

"Dude, there are like," Raj took a bite of shrimp, then took a sip of his mimosa, "so many famous people! You see that guy? I forgot his name, but he's the best friend in Transformers!"

Howard craned his neck backwards, looking for the said person. "I don't even think that guy's a celebrity, Raj." He scanned the room again and saw Sheldon making his way towards them. "Look, someone finally decided to join the party."

Leonard took a sip from his drink before turning to greet his roommate. "Hey, buddy! Glad to see you finally joining us! Was it lonely being all alone at the table?"

Sheldon quirked an eyebrow, taking a plate from the stack. "No, it was not. I was enjoying my moment of solitude when Penny's friends decided to interrupt me."

"I don't see why you're mad, I'd be ecstatic if Bailey interrupts me—hey!" Howard glared at Raj who was looking away, munching on a danish while pretending that he didn't hit him. "I said  _I'd_  past tense! I have a fiancee, okay? But that doesn't mean that I can't appreciate a hot lady—hey!" He this time turned to Leonard (who smacked him on the arm) and frowned, "I wasn't planning on doing anything! I'm just saying that Sheldon should be glad that a woman as pretty—but not as pretty as Bernadette, yet ten feet taller—is even paying attention to him! Well, unless Gregg's his type, then I seriously cannot relate."

The physicist sent a withering glare that made Howard rethink his life choices. Sheldon was obviously  _not_  in the mood for fun and games. "If you are, again, hinting at my sexual preference, I will not hesitate to make the laser in your laboratory malfunction and somehow get redirected to you." The three men winced, hoping that the one accident he needed was still lightyears away from where they were standing. "I am also ignoring your lewd comments about—who may be—the most annoying woman on the face of the earth, but shall you bring it up again in my presence I shall make sure that Bernadette will hear of all of your past exploits. Now, to clarify my statement, I am mad as they badgered me with nonsensical questions when I could have been pondering the questions that have yet to be answered."

"Like who let the dogs out?" Raj curiously asked, taking another sip of his mimosa.

"No," Sheldon snarled, placing his plate on the table and stepping back to look around. "Where are the twins?" The three men all looked at each other, "weren't they with you?"

Sheldon frowned at all three men; how could they possibly lose track of the twins?!

"The shrimp was just so... big and you know that I can't  _always_  have shrimp."

"I was trying to look for something that wasn't shrimp and dint have dairy... pretty much everything has milk."

"I was looking for chicks that might give Raj a second glance—hey! I have a fiancee and my intentions are pure! Geez, Raj!"

Sheldon sucked on his teeth, making sure that his death glare was able to pierce into the deepest core of their soul, so that they will never think of angering him again. "Drop your food and  _look for them_ ," he hissed, glancing around the room again for any chance that he would be able to easily spot the toddlers. "I will not allow them to catch any foreign germs that they will carry to our apartment. Shall they do that, you will  _all_  suffer." The three nodded, and they all scrambled around the restaurant. Why he even thought of leaving the twins with these three incompetent fools, he'll never know. It was always up to him to correct their mistakes. What if the twins were recognized by an shady person that wants to harm Penny in some way and decides to kidnap them? Like a stalker? What would they tell the already paranoid mother before she decides to tear them limb by limb only to be fed to a community of cannibals that are hungry and haven't thought of eating each other? Though the scientific community would notice the loss of the other three, he would surely be grieved over for forty days and forty nights as they have lost the one person who could make a significant breakthrough that everyone had been long waiting for!

He moved from the private section of the establishment and went towards the bar, where several people were foolishly mingling. The restaurant was jam packed, and two toddlers of three feet were impossible to find merely by spotting their heads with the way people kept moving. He suddenly thought of how the twins could possibly be suffocating because of the overpopulation of the area and quickly maneuvered through the crowd to find them. He was lucky that he was taller than the average person, or else he wouldn't have come to the conclusion that the toddlers weren't there by scanning through the crowd and sorting them via height and hair color. With a relieved sigh, he moved over to the open garden area that overlooked the city. It was also part of the restaurant where many people were eating at. He had to hand it to Gregg's paramour, the establishment was one of a kind. He had never seen a restaurant that had so many choices of dining that it made his head spin. There was the garden area, the bar, the private rooms, and one more place he hadn't went to, yet. Plus, it was very well kept and wasn't as bad as he thought.

Shaking the observations of the restaurant from his head, he walked through the garden area, ignoring the looks that the diners were giving him. He didn't care if looked lost with the way he kept turning his head to find the twins. He had a feeling that they were here; the area was a gigantic garden that had a slightly elevated patio deck where the people ate. Knowing the twins, they'd love any chance of running and playing on the grass. That was why they were always at the park; because the twins didn't like being cramped up in one building where they couldn't play. They were too energetic for their own good. He pursed his lips as he walked down the four steps from the deck to the garden, slightly frowning as the sole of his shoes met with the grass. It was hard to concentrate when there was smidgens of dirt on the tip of his shoes, especially when the classical music was blaring, and was intercepting with his Vulcan hearing. He had heard the sound of young laughter when he exited the main building, and it was what told him that the twins were there.

He kept walking—the garden was even bigger than the deck—frantically turning his head to see any signs of the twins. But it was when the current song stopped, allowing a moment of silence before the next song played, that he heard sniffling coming from a part that was surrounded by bushes.

"Andy, Maddie," he stated as he stood behind the shrubbery, spotting the twins. Maddie was hopping from one foot to the other (a mannerism she did whenever she was nervous and didn't know what to do) while Andy was on the grass, softly crying. "What are you doing here?" Maddie looked up at him with wide blue eyes that were close to tears, and he glanced at the leg that Andy was clutching. There was a small wound on his knee that had started to bleed. It didn't look serious, and he was secretly glad. This was why he was against the shorts thing that Raj kept prodding when he was deciding on what the twins should wear. Had Andy worn pants—like what a normal person would wear—the fabric would have lessen the blow of whatever cut Andy's knee and would possibly be just a harmless scrape.

Sheldon pushed his pants up to his knees to avoid getting it dirty before crouching down to inspect Andy's wound. "What happened to your brother?"

Maddie trotted over to him, worry evident on her cherubic face. "Andy wun, Maddie wun, too! But Andy twip and got booboo!" She pointed a finger towards the wound then started to flail her arms in panic. "Andy was cuh-wying and Maddie scawed!"

Andy sniffed, his lips still trembling as he looked down at his knee. "Dat owie."

Sighing, Sheldon lifted the crying toddler and grabbed Maddie's hand before leading them to the edge of the patio deck. He placed Andy on it and reached for the keychain disinfectant spray that he clipped at one of the belt holes. He should have brought some iodine, too. He had a hunch that something like this would happen, and he was glad that he was prepared. Pfft. He was always prepared. "That part of your body is called  _knee_ , and you have scraped it." The toddlers easily repeated the word, and he continued. "There is a possibility that bacteria might be on the wound, therefore I must disinfect it. Breathe in, as this may sting." Andy nodded—having gone through this before when they were at the park—closing his eyes tightly as Sheldon wiped off the light dirt that surrounded the tiny wound with his handkerchief. It wasn't really meant for cleaning dirt, but he did not trust the staff to give him sterile napkins, so he'd have to make the tiny sacrifice for now. He inspected the wound and saw that it wasn't deep enough to scar—which was a relief as the blame might be directed towards him.

Andy made a light hissing sound when he sprayed the wound, and he somewhat felt bad for causing him pain. Once the liquid had settled down, Sheldon frowned at the wound. It really wasn't big, but it was still possible for it to get infected by bacteria—he had to seal it. But he didn't have any bandaids other than the ones in his pocket. Which were for  _his_  personal use. And it didn't look like there was a pharmacy section or a convenience kiosk in this establishment, which meant that there was no one who had bandaids with them. He really should have brought the baby bag that he always brought along when they took the twins somewhere. If only he hadn't allowed Raj to persuade him into not bringing it; if he didn't listen, then he wouldn't have a problem right now. He slipped his hand into his pocket and slightly pulled the three pieces of bandaids that had little rocket ships on it.

Those were  _his_  bandaids to be used for  _his_  wounds.

But... Andy's wound needed a bandaid, and he would be an irresponsible temporary de-facto guardian if he didn't attend to this dire situation. The more time he pondered, the more bacteria would try to get to his wound!

Mustering up all the self-restraint he could from changing his mind; Sheldon fully pulled a bandaid from his packet and quickly peeled off the adhesive covers. He let out a sharp inhale as he saw the adhesive part of the bandaid and momentarily thought of various scenarios of how he would need all three bandaids before quickly shaking it off. This was the real sacrifice he had to make and he backed it up with the thought of what he'd do if some kind of bacteria infected Andy and got him sick. He didn't want that to happen—at all—which was why it didn't feel as bad when he finally placed the bandaid on top of the wound. God forbid he trip three times and be in need of one extra bandaid.

"There," he uneasily said, tapping the toddler's knee lightly before standing up. "Now, you're all good to go."

Andy stared at the bandaid with awe, gingerly poking it before tilting his head back to stare at the tall man. "Dat Sedon's band-ed," he said as if it was the most obvious statement in the world, which Maddie nodded to in agreement. "It okay?"

Sheldon sighed, placing his large hand on top of the toddler's head, ruffling the mop of blonde hair. He briefly remembered how when the twins first arrived to live with them, Andy's hair was short and thin; now, his hair was thick, reaching up to his shoulder, with the tips slightly curled. Maddie's hair had grown as well, but not as much as Andy's had. To Sheldon, it didn't really seem like they had been lodging with them for almost two months—it was like they had just arrived with the way time flew by. But it also felt like he'd known the twins since before they were born, and for some reason, he felt sad about it. "Of course it's okay. I'd rather you take one of my bandaids than your wound getting infected and in the end results to gangrene, and your leg getting amputated."

Andy face twisted as he tried to comprehend what the adult said, "ampu-tatid?" Then turned to Maddie who had the same look of confusion on her face, "gan-geen?"

"There's an  _R_  in gangrene," corrected Sheldon as he lifted Andy and propped him on the deck. "Are you okay, now?"

"Andy miss mommy," the toddler murmured, his head tilting down slightly. "Maddie miss mommy, too, but no say."

Sheldon turned to Maddie, who had a sad look on her face. It made his heart clench. "Maddie miss mommy, too. Mommy gone foh a wong time, now."

It wasn't strong, but Sheldon felt his heart sinking as the toddlers sniffled. They missed their mother, and for once, he understood their sentiments. He remembered how he was all alone in Germany when he was still young. He didn't know anyone there, and his mother couldn't stay long as she had to attend to his other siblings that weren't as academically gifted as him. Honestly, he somewhat envied the twins in their condition. Although their mother—and possibly, father—was not with them, they still had the luxury of having each other, and had him and the others to accompany them. He had no one other than his co-teachers that treated him with disdain, and the students who questioned his credibility due to his age and often acted in defiance to him. It wasn't lonely, but he was upset most of the time, and the twins might be feeling that, too—they just didn't recognize it due to their youth. However, the circumstances were different with the twins as he was at least sixteen, and the twins are barely two years old.

According to some articles he read, children of that age direly needed to be in the presence of at least one parent. They had none, since Leonard really was not their father, and it was impressive that they were holding up thus far. It was said that children of their age who do not experience the love of a parent often affects them up until adulthood, and had a chance of pushing them towards rebellion. Like getting pregnant early, or doing drugs or becoming a painter. He wouldn't want that to happen. He didn't want to meet the two of them one day and Maddie would have six kids at twenty while Andy would be a drug addict who is constantly in and out of rehab. He wished he had someone who would do what he was about to do next when he was sad and alone in Germany. He wasn't going to allow the twins to spiral down into nothingness while he was around. And he definitely wasn't going to allow them to feel the sadness he felt when he was in Deutschland.

Placing a hand on a each of the twins' shoulder, he crouched down to meet both of their gazes. Even with the curious looks on their faces, he could see their sadness and longing for their mother in their eyes. "I'm not sure what I'm supposed to say that would make you feel better, but I know how you feel. When I was about fifteen times your age, I went to Germany as a visiting professor. I, too, was not with my mother and I found it very difficult to function without her. What I am trying to say, is that you shouldn't feel too lonely, as I know that she is missing you as much as you miss her." Two pairs of blue eyes lit up. "And I assure you, she will return soon, and you will be reunited with her before you even know. Your mother loves you dearly, and it was not easy for her to leave you with us. But, she probably took the job for you—and slightly for her career—and the wait will be worth it in the end. So, please cheer up, as I am not good with these kind of things." He gave them a small smile before straightening his posture, "I'd offer you a hot beverage, but the restaurant we're eating at is on the other side."

Suddenly, two pairs of arms were spreading out to him, and it was Maddie who spoke. "Hug?"

Sheldon's eyes widened at the two toddlers who were expecting him to engage in physical contact with them. He didn't want to, but he supposed that it was appropriate.

With a small sigh, he bent down and hugged them.

And for some odd reason, he felt an overwhelming sense of warmth as his gangly arms encircled their tiny bodies. It was similar to the one he felt whenever he looked at their photo shoot—except it was stronger. It was warm, comforting and familiar, and it made him want to cry. There was just an overflowing amount of emotion that was flooding through his body, and it only made him tighten his hold on the toddlers. They made him feel like he was home, like his mother or his Meemaw was giving him a hug. He could swear that he was on the verge of tears, and he did all he could to hold them back. The warmth of the hug was making his hands clammy, and his heart race, and all he could do was wonder  _why_  he was feeling that way. It was so powerful—much more than when Maddie slept beside him, or whenever he looked at the pictures. He always carried Maddie, and often did, too, with Andy, but he never felt this way before. It was enveloping him, and if he didn't stop, this would bring up questions he wasn't sure if he had answers to.

So, he hastily pulled away and matched the twins' happy grins with a weak one.

"Let's return to the party," he said as he lifted Maddie while trying to regain his composure, "we might be missing your mother's possible win, and I wouldn't want that to happen." Andy took his hand and they casually walked through the curious diners who were watching their every move.

"Which reminds me, what is your position on your mother marrying Leonard?"

Maddie looked up at him with curiosity, "mommy mah-wee Uncah Wenad?"

The physicist nodded as they re-entered the restaurant, turning left at a hallway to avoid entering the bar. "Yes, exactly. Will you be happy about it?"

Andy craned his head back, "why mommy mah-wee Uncah Wenad?"

Maddie shrugged from Sheldon's arm, peering down at his twin. "Dunno."

Then Andy said something Sheldon didn't think he'd hear, "wat abaht daddy?"

"You have a father?" He asked with slight incredulity—ignoring how he sounded so stupid with that question—and was met by the twins' laughter.

"Sheldon, there you are!" Gregg called, brisk walking towards him. "I've been looking for you everywhere! Come on, the Emmys is close to announcing Penny's category!" The flamboyant man then grabbed Andy, then proceeded to grab his arm and dragged him back to the private room.

* * *

"So," Raj started, confidently walking up to Bailey. He had drank two glasses of mimosas, now, and he was ready to talk to some famous women. Starting with the gorgeous dark haired, green eyed, alabaster skinned and two inches taller (six if you included the heels) beauty that was, Bailey Mckenzie. "If all of you are here, who's at the Emmys?"

Bailey raised a fine eyebrow at the foreign man and his two friends who were silently trotting after him. After talking to Mr. Genius, she lost all minuscule interest she had for the other three men. Well, except the short one with the odd hair—she heard that he was Penny's ex, and that made her slightly curious of asking him how his and Penny's relationship was. Mostly because she loved gossip. "Mr. Fleming—our awesome director—is there, but he's leaving after they announce the winner for outstanding actress in a comedy series."

"But you guys are nominated for outstanding comedy series, too," Howard added, turning towards the huge screen that was playing the awards show. "If you guys win, who will get the award?"

"A fine question," Bailey calmly said, smirking at the three men, "you see,  _Halfway There_  was nominated for; outstanding lead actress—that's Penny—outstanding lead actor—that's Gregg—outstanding supporting actress—that's wonderful ol' moi—outstanding supporting actor, outstanding comedy series, and a bunch of technical awards that were given away about a week ago. We won majority of the effects and sounds, so really all that matters is Penny's award." She glanced at the three men who looked absolutely confused by what she said; they probably didn't watch anything that wasn't ended or geeky. "You see, only Penny has a fighting chance to win.  _Modern Family_  will win the series award, like always, so we're not getting our hopes up. We're pretty pessimistic about that award, it's like they only nominated us cause they get a kick at seeing our disappointed faces—which we quickly have to change to a faux happy one for the camera—when they win. Either  _Modern Family's Sofia Vergara_  or  _Julie Bowen_  will win outstanding supporting actress—the one I'm nominated for—like they always do. Then outstanding lead actor will probably be won by  _Jim Parsons_."

"Who's  _Jim Parsons_?" Leonard asked, snacking on a bowl of peanuts.

Bailey stared incredulously at the bespectacled man. Had he been living under a rock or something? These guys really didn't know anything outside being smart and scientific or something. She didn't watch the show (and often forgot the name) but she knew who  _he_  was. "He's the star of that geeky show that never wins at the Emmys. But, he won the award that Gregg's nominated for for two years straight now, and if he wins again, he'll be setting a record. I've only seen a few scenes of his show, but even I know that he's a really great actor."

"Didn't you also say that your show got a nomination for outstanding supporting actor?" Leonard remembered, causing Bailey to frown. This guy had too many questions. "Why didn't you mention him?"

"That's cause the guy nominated is James Watson," Gregg's distinct voice said out of nowhere before appearing from a crowd with Andy on one of his arms and Sheldon and Maddie trailing shortly behind him. "He's a real arrogant douche that thinks he's going to win, when secretly, his character's getting killed next season." Bailey nodded in agreement as Gregg settled beside her, setting Andy on top of the cocktail table. "It was a unanimous decision between the cast and the crew that we kill him off. We all hate him  _that_  much, and we didn't even invite him here, so he's there at the award show."

"Dude," Raj whispered to Howard and Leonard, subtly pointing a finger towards Andy. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that a Sheldon only bandaid that's on Andy's knee?"

Leonard and Howard both titled their bodies to check, and felt their eyes widening as they proved Raj's statement. Sheldon  _never_  allowed any of them to use his personal bandaids even if that was all they needed to save themselves from dying. They also knew that it was impossible that or  _wasn't_  the Sheldon only bandaids, as Raj had refused to allow Sheldon to bring the twins' baby bag that contained everything the twins could possibly need. And Leonard knew that Sheldon didn't like bringing a lot of things unless he had a bag. Therefore, it really was one of the Sheldon only bandaids! They sent each other a look that they all understood; progress was happening!

Gregg grinned as the screen beside the one showing the Emmys turned on, and was now showing a Skype call to Penny. "They're calling Penny up! This is exciting!"

"Mommy?" Maddie asked at the mention of her mother's name. "Vid-yah co-hl mommy?"

Sheldon set her beside her twin, grabbing a glass of grape juice that a waiter was carrying on a tray and handed it Maddie. She'd be happier with the  _wine._ "Yes, they're about to call your mother. They're about to announce who the winner is for the category your mother is nominated for."

"Hey guys!"

Sheldon glanced over his shoulder to see Penny's smiling face on the screen. She was wearing a gray hoodie with her hair up, and she seemed nervous and excited at the same time with the way her green eyes lit up and her brows furrowed. Beside her was—he watched the  _Marvel Cinematic Universe_  movies and most recently,  _Joss Whedon's Avengers—Scarlett Johansen_  (who also starred in Penny's new movie) who was shyly smiling at the screen, commenting about how much Penny's friends supported her, to which Penny responded by joking that she paid all of them to go there. "No, but really Scar, it was Gregg and Bailey who fixed everything up."

Gregg chuckled beside Sheldon, grabbing the microphone stand and removing it from it's holder. "This is all for show, when Penny gets back, this is all going on her tab."

Bailey raised her glass of mimosa towards the screen as Penny mock gasped, "heads up, blondie, I just bought all of your friends a bottle of the priciest champagne they have here, each. The bill is  _so_  going to leave a gigantic dent in your next paycheck!"

The blonde laughed heartily through the screen, causing the Avengers actress to laugh along with her. "Which reminds me! Everyone, I'm sure you all know the lovely Scarlett Johansen, and Scar, these are all of my friends! I'd tell you all of their names, but it might take a day or two and we only got an hour of break."

"Oh my god," Raj stammered as he took a picture of the two actresses on the screen with his phone, "I can't believe I'm actually video chatting with  _the_  Scarlett Johansen! Black Widow! In the flesh! Well, on the screen, but you know what I mean!"

Howard leaned over to check the quality of the picture Raj took, "I actually feel you for once. Hey, send me that photo when we get home! Or tag me on Facebook, that will really look great on my timeline!"

Leonard took a picture of his phone and grinned, "guys, this is such an awesome day. Wait til the guys at the comic book store see this!"

_"And now for the nominees for Outstanding Lead Actress for a Comedy."_

"Guys!" Gregg called, turning to the crowd that had gathered behind them, "it's time to wish Penny good luck!" They all nodded, before yelling 'good luck' at the same time.

Maddie struggled to grab the mic, but got it once Gregg handed it to her and Andy. "Mommy, Maddie wish good wuck!"

Andy snatched the mic from her sister, "Mommy! Andy wish you good wuck, too! Good wuck, mommy!"

Penny smiled warmly at the screen that was filled with almost a hundred people who were wishing her luck. "Thanks, twins, you don't know how calming it is to hear your voices."

One of the staff raised the volume of the speakers to max as the screen finished showing a snippet of  _Tina Fey_  in  _30 Rock_. "It's Penny's turn!"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow as the screen transitioned from one scene of a show to another. This time, it was Penny.

 _"You can't do that, Pete!"_ Penny's character growled; she was apparently up in heaven (it was the clouds that gave him the impression of this) with Gregg and Bailey's characters standing behind her as the blonde marched up to a wise looking old  _man. "You can't just decide to kill her because of what she did! You have to give her a second chance! She needs a second chance! Can't you understand that because of the mistake in the command center, this girl found a new outlook in life?"_  The old man's face softened, and Penny's character sighed in frustration.  _"You said it yourself. Everyone deserves a second chance, Pete. And I am telling you that that girl deserves one."_

There was a round of applause from both the audience in the private room and the ones in the award show as the screen transitioned to the next nominee's submitted episode.

Sheldon's lips formed a thin line as the people around him started congratulating Penny by passing the mic around. He had to admit, Penny was excellent it that scene. Had he been the guy she was calling Pete—which was probably St. Peter—he, too, would be persuaded to give whoever the said girl was a second chance. Penny's acting skills had improved vastly, and he somewhat regretted ever doubting her choice in career. Her sole performance in that scene deserved an award, and even he was moved by it. There was something about how her facial expression changed from one who was demanding something to be done (that the girl be given a second chance) to one that was desperate to change St. Peter's mind. How her tone transitioned from a strong woman who was dead set on getting what she wanted, then to one who had made her mind. That St. Peter was going to give the girl a second chance, whether he liked it or not. It was a powerful scene, and between her and the rest of the nominees, she had the best performance.

"Did you see that?" Gregg asked as the screen showed a scene from one Lena Dunham's show. "She was amazing, wasn't she?"

Sheldon swallowed, glancing at the screen that showed Penny whose attention was no longer at the video call, but was probably at the television. "She's remarkable."

"Do you think that Penny's going to win?" Bailey asked from beside Gregg, her dark green eyes shifting towards him. "Honest opinion, please."

"I," he paused, glancing this time at the twins who were staring in awe at the screens. He didn't have to tell them what he really thought. "I am here to make sure that the twins are unharmed during their stay here, and not for anything else. I do not care about such trivial matters." He felt his eye twitch, and he hoped that none of them noticed that he was lying. Penny was remarkable, and he could not deny that.

Gregg laughed, causing him to frown at the flamboyant man. "You know, Dr. Smart, you've got a long way to go." He and Bailey sent Sheldon a wink before turning their attentions back to the tv where the presenters were opening the envelope.

_"And the winner is..."_

The presenters looked at the envelope, and the room fell silent.

_"Halfway There's Penny—"_

Sheldon nearly lost his hearing as the entire room cheered at the mention of Penny's name. The people were jumping, yelling and some were even crying (Raj and Gregg) while a few opened bottles of champagne and started spraying the others. Raj, Howard and Leonard were hugging each other; Gregg was sobbing while Bailey started nagging him on how he was looking foolish. He felt a tug on the sleeve of his blazer, and turned to see the Penny reminiscent toddlers grinning up at him before standing and hugging him. He wasn't sure of what he was doing, but he placed an arm that reached past both of them and gave their backs a small pat. They may not have known what it exactly meant for their mother to have won, and they didn't care; they were just happy that their mother won. He was, too.

"I won," Penny mumbled in disbelief, her eyes wide with tears forming as Scarlett wrapped her arms around her, and various other cast members from her movie. "I won the Emmy." Several men and women started to hug her as the blonde shed tears of joy.

_"And to accept the award is Halfway There's director, Mr. Clarence Fleming!"_

The screen featured a lively middle-aged man with grey hair and a white beard and was sporting glasses. He stood at the middle of the stage, the trophy in one hand and a piece of paper in the other.  _"Penny couldn't be here as she is in France shooting her new movie, so she sent me here to bear the anxiety we all experience before the winner is announced."_  The audience in the screen laughed, and the director grinned.  _"Penny asked me to read the speech she prepared, so I'm going to get to it before they start waving the flag for overtime."_  He cleared his throat, then proceeded to read off his phone.

 _"Even from where I am, right now, I can't believe that I won. This surreal feeling might never disappear even when I pass on, and I am forever grateful for those to chose me. I'd like to thank my family in Nebraska; my mom, my dad, my brother and my sister who never stopped supporting my career. My Halfway There crew—if it hadn't been for this wonderful show, I wouldn't even be nominated. To Mr. Fleming (_ that's me _), Gregg, Bailey, Grant, the staff, and practically everyone from that show. You guys helped me in everything I did, from my twins to the color of my nails. I'd be lost if I didn't have a crew as great as you. To all of my friends old and new, and to my fans, who if I was without, I would not be here. You all inspired me to follow my dreams, positive and negative comments, and for that I thank you from the bottom of my heart. And especially to my two wonderful kids; Andy and Maddie—and to your dad, too, for giving me the two of you. You are the greatest gifts I've ever received, my motivation, my inspiration and my everything. Without the two of you, I'm not sure if I would still have gotten to where I am, now. My success is your success, and I hope that someday in the near future, when you're old enough to understand what I'm saying, you see this and know that I really am nothing without the two of you. All of this is for the two of you, and I love you with all my heart and soul. Again, thank you for this magnificent award!"_ The director raised the award over his head, and the audience (both the room and the ones in the screen) roared in applause.

"That has got to be the most touching thing I've ever heard," Gregg sniffled as he gave the twins—who had not understood why everyone was crying and only recognized their names—each a kiss on their forehead.

Bailey loudly blew her nose on a handkerchief (which went unnoticed by everyone except Sheldon) and wiped away her tears with her hand. "God, blondie made me cry. James is probably seething with anger cause not only did he not win, but he also was not mentioned in blondie's speech. That's what he gets for being such a prick." The dark haired actress sucked in a shaky breath before hugging the clueless toddlers, "you guys are so lucky to have the greatest mom in the world."

"Dude!" Raj cried, still emotional from Penny's speech, "I just can't stop crying!"

Leonard nodded in agreement, wiping his tears on his sleeve. "I wish I could claim that this is just allergies, but I can't, because that was the most touching speech I've ever heard. If my mom was that great, I wouldn't be as emotional as I am, now."

Howard sniffed as he placed his phone back into his pocket, "Bernie and my mom just called. They said that they heard the entire speech, and that even if it wasn't Penny who said it, all they could hear was Penny. My mom's still crying with Bernie, and Bernie's saying that if my mom continues crying the entire night, our house might get flooded." The other two men nodded, before they all hugged each other as they cried over Penny's speech.

Sheldon clenched his teeth. This was  _impossible_. He was not getting emotional over some speech that wasn't even Penny speaking. He could already feel the tears prickling his eyes, and he was doing all he could to not let them fall. The entire room was a mess; practically everyone—minus him—was crying. Even Penny and the people with her were crying, and for once, he couldn't blame them. All of them were witnesses of how much Penny  _wanted_  this. Even he knew about Penny's desire to be a successful renowned actress. Every adult in the room saw how Penny strived, and knew that this meant everything to the blonde. It was one of the first things she ever revealed to them, and it was constantly the reason why he ridiculed her. If there was something Penny would give her everything to get, it would be to fulfill her dream of being a successful actress. To him, her acting career seemed like an unreachable dream. With the way Penny's career was going back then, the math told him that there was a zero chance of her ever getting her big break. And his calculations were never wrong.

However, he saw it right before him. Today was the day that Penny finally made her dreams come true. He had been wrong, and he was ready to admit it. Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper was wrong about Penny, and he didn't even feel bad about admitting it to himself.

* * *

"I can't believe you didn't congratulate Penny," Leonard softly ranted as he carried a sleeping Maddie in his arms. They had just returned from the party, and was tired from all of the celebrating everyone did. Before they left, everyone except Sheldon personally congratulated Penny through the call. They even got to meet the jolly director who Gregg and Bailey joked that he deserved to win an award for delivering the most unbelievably touching speech in the world.

"There was a line, and I don't like lines and people. Especially people in lines." Sheldon snarled, shrugging off his blazer and hanging it on his desk chair. "Besides, we talk to Penny on a daily basis. I can always congratulate her without having to risk getting germs, thank you very much."

Leonard shook his head; his roommate really was something else. "Well, call her up. Andy's still awake, and won't sleep unless Penny says goodnight to him. Penny promised to answer the call, so don't be afraid to get your throat virtually punched." When his roommate didn't respond, he took it as a yes and proceeded to bring Maddie to his room to sleep.

Sheldon raised an eyebrow as he turned back to his desk and opened his laptop. Once it was on, he opened Skype and invited  _Penny Blossom_  for a video chat. After a few seconds, he was met with a tired, yet happy looking Penny. "Hey, Sheldon, gonna carry me to say goodnight to the twins?"

He gave her a small smile, "yes, well you know that your children simply cannot sleep without hearing your mellifluous voice." He heard her giggle as he lifted his laptop, "I know what that means, now. So, I'm taking that as a compliment."

"By the way, I forgot to tell you," he raised the laptop to meet Penny's inaccurate gaze; this was easier to do through a screen. "Congratulations on the win, you deserved it more than anyone. Leonard informed me that the Emmys is the television equivalent of a Nobel, and that is truly impressive." He watched as Penny blinked at the screen, and he simply continued. He believed that credit should be given where credit was due. Penny deserved his praise and apology, more than anyone, actually. "And I must admit, I knew that you would win. You've finally fulfilled your dreams of being a successful and famous actress, and I apologize for ever doubting you, Penny. You were truly remarkable, and I was foolish of ever failing to see that."

"Thank you, sweetie. That really means a lot to me." Penny gave him a soft smile that was filled with appreciation and genuine happiness. It was the smile that Penny had on in the magazine, and this time, there was nothing off about it. It was the same one he gave her whenever she was having a nice day and the met in the hallway. It was the one she gave him after he hugged her, and after he loaned her money, and after he helped her with her flower beret business. It was slightly smaller than the one she sent him after her pain medication wore off after she slipped in her shower—though, it was the same smile nonetheless. One he hadn't seen in a while. He responded with a small smile of his own—one that didn't channel the Joker, or koalas—it was the rare smile he had that the others barely noticed when he had it on. So rare, that even he didn't notice that he was doing it.

And for the first time in two long years, Sheldon realized that he missed his former blonde neighbor.


	9. Vague Pictures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sheldon and the gang go to a special meet and greet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Steel Samurai, The Jamming Ninja, The Pink Princess, The Evil Magistrate, The Nickel Samurai and co. all belong to Capcom and Phoenix Wright; Ace Attorney.

If there was anything in this world that could get four grown up men to fear their lives like someone cornered by a starving lion, it would be the redheaded manager of Sunshine Fun Center.

Smiling Brenda.

"—it has been decided that Maddie will play the duck, and Andy will play the sheep."

The four men couldn't help but drown the redhead out to focus on how eerie her smile was. Like they always said, she reminded them of the Joker, except an actual one. They didn't really intend to scrutinize the kind woman (seriously) who was actually very nice to them, it was just that her smile was so disturbing. It was impossible to  _not_  notice. Comparing it to other smiles, it really wasn't too different, but once you saw her doing it, it would be inevitable to not get bothered by it. Her normal smiling face was usually a tight lipped one that was probably because her lips were just... naturally smiling. Her smile was actually nice—if she had other facial expressions. Smiling Brenda's facial expressions were divided into two categories; creepy smile and plaguing smile. The creepy smile was the one she had on whenever she was talked to, and when she wasn't talking to anyone. The plaguing smile was actually her cheshire grin that further accentuated the curve at each end of her lips that made it so... creepy. Like the wide smiles that the creepy cartoon cats had. What really made it eerie was the fact that she never stopped smiling.

Leonard theorized that she was just a generally happy person.

Howard tried to point out that smiling Brenda only smiled like that to them, as everyone else didn't seem to be bothered by it.

Raj commented that it really just was the smiling quality that the curve of her mouth had.

Sheldon reasoned that it was the reason of his nightmares, and tried convincing one of them to anger the redhead to see if her smile would falter even for a bit.

They all rejected the idea, as Raj said something about how the happiest people were normally the ones who were dying inside. That brought the four of them to think of various scenarios that would stem from one of them angering the calm lady. There was of smiling Brenda (Leonard's idea) stalking them back to their houses and hiding in their showers with a kitchen knife, waiting for them before ruthlessly killing each of them. Then there was one where smiling Brenda (Howard's idea) would give them each a video tape of something that she was involved with, and once they watched it, they would get haunted by something for seven days before smiling Brenda comes out of the television still smiling on the seventh day. Then there was one where smiling Brenda (Raj's idea) would get furious yet still retain the smile on her face while swearing at them. Then there was one where smiling Brenda (Sheldon's idea) wouldn't react at all—while really seething on the inside—and everywhere they go, hiding in the shadows and making them feel anxious; then when night time falls, smiling Brenda would somehow simultaneously appear from their own shadows, reaching out to turn them to face her—forcing them to see her grin that has blood oozing out from her teeth before stabbing them on the stomach with a rusty knife that will lead to their untimely death.

Though the three wondered how Sheldon even got an idea as horrifying as that, they all found themselves tossing and turning the following night. Dreams of all four of their predictions plagued their slumber, which was what was making them eye the redhead cautiously. She was actually really nice, but their poor judgement wasn't making them see that, right now.

"—we will provide the costumes for the play, so none of you have to worry about anything." Smiling Brenda smiled at them (when did she not) then glanced over her shoulder to look at the whiteboard. "The play will be sometime next week, or so. But, there really isn't anything to worry—the twins are doing great!"

Maddie nodded in agreement, twisting her body from Leonard's arms to turn to the other adults. "Maddie good at quack!" She took a deep breath before imitating the animal she was going to play, "quack! Quack, quack, quack!"

Andy huffed from Raj's arms, crossing his arms, "Andy want to be duck. Andy da seep." He had on a bitter frown as he did his own set of animal sounds, "bah, bah. No fun."

"There's an  _H_  in shee—ow!" Sheldon glared at Leonard who was sending him a look of disapproval.

"If you're wondering," the redhead piped in, "they really won't be doing the animal noises. Their play mostly consists of them doing a couple of gestures along to Old McDonald. They're not really going to do the animal noises, but we teach them the animal sounds, anyway." Smiling Brenda widened her smile, directing it towards the twins. "They've already memorized majority of the routine! Well, it consists mostly of waving Maddie's arms, flailing and waddling, while Andy's steps are practically only of him on all fours and swaying a bit—but compared to the other toddlers, they've really got the steps down pat!"

Maddie folded her arms then started flapping her hands. "Quack, quack!"

Andy grumbled a bit, then swayed in Raj's arms, "bah."

Smiling Brenda's eyes lit up, "see? They've got it down pat!"

Howard leaned towards Sheldon, lowering his voice, "is it just me, or is she just happy in everything she does—in a creepy way?"

Sheldon cocked an eyebrow, surveying smiling Brenda's unmoving smile as she conversed with Leonard and Raj about the upcoming play. "I will not agree nor disagree with what you said as I fear that she might turn to talk to me if I do. However, I do believe that—while doing this in a way that does not mention said person whatsoever to avoid a Beetlejuice scenario—I feel an ominous shiver run through my body each time that said person directs said person's attention towards me." The two men shuddered at the thought of smiling Brenda talking to them when they already evaded the terrifying smile. It was a hypothesis between the two of them, that whenever they mentally mentioned the redhead's name or so much as thought of her, she would turn to them to plague them with her smile. Which was why they were giving zero effort in trying to join in the conversation.

Then something  _miraculous_  happened.

"Oh, Brenda!" One of the teachers called, trotting up to the redhead. "There's a problem."

Smiling Brenda turned her body slightly to look at the brunette, her smile smaller, yet still there. "What's wrong?"

"Remember the air vent that wasn't working that we kept on asking the janitor to fix?" Smiling Brenda nodded. "Well, we asked him to fix it yesterday, but it turns out that he didn't. It's really humid in the Clear Sky room, and it was a good thing that all of the students already went home."

For the first time  _ever_ , smiling Brenda's smile dropped and was replaced with an ominous frown that was absolutely terrifying the four men. "What? I told him to get it fixed yesterday, and he said that he did!" She hissed, clucking her tongue in irritation. "I'll talk to him, don't worry." Her frown lifted as she turned back to the frightened men, sending them a non-creepy smile. "If you'll excuse me, I have to settle something." She gave the brunette a look that told her to follow her. "Bye, Andy and Maddie! See you soon!" With a wave, the redhead spun on her heels and marched past them towards a different hallway.

"Did you see that?" Howard shrieked, struggling to keep his voice low do that no one else in the building can hear him. "She  _frowned!_ "

Sheldon let out a breath, still startled at what had just happened. He gripped the strap of his messenger bag, shifting his eyes to Howard. "I am questioning my sanity if what just happened was real or a simple illusion, but as I can feel my hand pressing against my strap as I grip it, I am not dreaming—nor is it an illusion or a hallucination—therefore that just happened."

Raj blinked ten times, then searched the room for the redhead. "That just happened cause I didn't drink anything, and I was seriously just waiting for her smile to drop the entire time. And it happened! Plus, her frowning is actually scarier than her smile!"

"I have to agree with Raj," mumbled Leonard, his free hand grasping his chin in thought. "Her frowning was so much scarier than her everlasting smile. In fact, it's so scary that I don't even mind her smiling anymore. Her smile even seems pleasant now that we've seen her dark side." The four men all nodded in agreement, causing Andy to send his twin a quizzical look from his position in Raj's arms.

The four men all stood in the middle of Sunshine Fun Center's lobby, probing how terrifying smiling Brenda's unhappy expression was. Though they were creeped out by the smiling woman, they were accustomed to her smile. It was already expected of her to smile all the time, even if it did give them nightmares. With them finally proving that smiling Brenda did have another expression other than smiling, her smiling face seemed less... creepy. It still crawled under their skin, causing goosebumps and shivers to run down their spines, but it no longer made them fear their life. Or the shower. Or the shadows. Now, she was just kinda creepy.

"So," Raj started, tearing each of them from their thoughts regarding the redhead. "How about we go clear our thoughts and get some cookies?" Sheldon sent him a scathing look. "No, no, wait and listen. I was roaming around the internet when I saw this article about this patisserie in Los Angeles that supposedly makes some of the best pastries out there! They first started out in  _Cupcake Wars_ , and after they won, they ventured out to making cookies and stuff. I saw the reviews, and they were great! They were even featured on  _the Today show!_ "

"Hmm," Sheldon hummed disapprovingly, "getting featured in a television show is already discrediting, but joining a televised contest that does not make full use of said patisserie's abilities and over exaggerates the terms of the challenge is much worse. Are you sure that they're supposedly one of the best out there?"

"Well, for one, they made C3P0 cookies for one of the challenges..." Raj mused, raising a curious eyebrow at Sheldon who looked interested. "And they made a Death Star display for the final challenge, which was for a celebrity's Star Wars themed party."

"Det Stah!" Maddie chirped, grinning widely. "Maddie want Det Stah, peas!"

"Is C3P0 the only character they design?" Sheldon questioned.

"Dude, the owner is a major Star Wars fan! There's loads of Star Wars themed food!" Raj nodded happily in response, making Sheldon's frown lift, but not too much. "Fine, but if this proves to not be as good as you thought, I get the right to say I told you so. I am only agreeing to this as I am curious, nothing more."

Sheldon gestured to the exit before leading them out of the establishment.

Howard chuckled to Leonard, "leave it to George Lucas to get Sheldon to do something." The three men all laughed together, until Sheldon barked that they get moving.

* * *

"I told you so," hissed Sheldon as they stood at the very end of the line in front of the store. "If we simply returned home, this wouldn't happen."

Raj sighed, counting the number of people in front of them. "There's only a line because the food is so good! They don't just serve desserts, they have full course meals, too!"

Leonard noticed how Sheldon's eyes ticked, which did not mean anything good. "Sheldon, calm down. Raj's right, there wouldn't be a line if the food wasn't good." The line moved, and three sets of people entered the corner brownstone store. It was actually a pretty nice place; it was the corner store and had it's own outdoor seating. With the way people were flowing in and out, the food must really be good. "Look, the line just moved!" He pushed the twins' stroller and took ten steps forward. There were only five groups of people left. "The line's moving pretty quickly."

Howard stuffed his hand in his pockets as he stood beside Sheldon, "I just saw a lava cake with sparklers on top come out of that restaurant. That has to mean that it's good!"

"But with this line, it will be impossible to enjoy the food whilst thinking about how long we stood here before we even got to get our order!" The theoretical physicist huffed, sending a glare to all five groups in front of them. Had they not chose to dine here, he wouldn't have to deal with a stupid line. He had other things to do that was more important than buying frilly cakes and tea; like solving the questions of the universe that he would one day answer. "Think of this, there are five sets of people in front of us; the first having three people, the second having two, the third having five, the fourth having three and the fifth having two and one infant. Let's suppose that there are around five tables that can seat five people each inside, that means that twenty five people can dine inside. Then there are four table outside here that can hold four people each, and as we can see, are all full. The precious two sets of people had two people each, and as we do not know how many people are actually inside, let's say that they cannot find a table. There is a ten-to-one table ratio, and seeing the pace that people eat, it will take at least half an hour before a table clears up." The three men silently nodded, following Sheldon's train of thought. "Therefore, there are nineteen of us—excluding the twins—and zero tables left, which mea—"

"I thought I recognized that condescending voice," a familiar voice remarked, successfully interrupting Sheldon and causing him to scowl in frustration. Sheldon turned around to see Penny's dark haired friend, smirking as she made her way towards them.

_"Oh my god, it's Bailey Mckenzie from Halfway There!"_

_"Wow, she's so tall in person!"_

_"And she's so pretty! The rumors are true, she looks great even without makeup!"_

_"I can't believe she's standing right in front of me! I'm such a fan of her show!"_

Bailey raised an eyebrow, glancing at the gushing customers then back at Sheldon and his friends. "Wait right there, I just need to do something." Her expression changed from her usual haughtiness to a seemingly genuine happy one as she trotted over to the people in front of the line who kept calling her for photographs.

"How is it that she's nice to them, yet not to me?" Sheldon spat, deeply frowning as he watched the annoying woman happily take pictures with her supposed fans and talking to them nicely. She even dropped her usual snarky tone as she conversed with the various people hugging her and taking pictures with her.

Leonard shrugged, "I think she's nice. She's actually really nice, you know." The theoretical physicist sent him a look of disgust. "I'm serious! You just don't see it cause you react so negatively around her all the time. She even posed for a picture with all three of us twelve times so that we could make a calendar. Anyone who'd have the patience to do that isn't as bad as you'd think."

Sheldon shook his head in disbelief at the experimental physicist who was clearly out of his mind. It might have been a side effect of seeing smiling Brenda frown. He turned back at Penny's friend who was smiling happily as she took a picture with a fan, then gave the fan a hug, then signed the notebook that was held out to her. After a minute or so, Bailey reached the group of people who were standing in front of them in line and proceeded to take pictures with all of them before heading back to them. He found it somewhat amazing how the people recognized Bailey even with her large sunglasses—had he not had an eidetic memory that recalled the actress' voice and facial structure, he wouldn't have known that it was her. He briefly wondered if Penny dealt with being recognized all the time. If Bailey was immediately swarmed by excited fans, then there was no doubt about it that the blonde was, too. Then he wondered if the twins were ever subjected to swarming fans whenever they and their mother were out doing menial tasks. It must have been exhausting for all of them.

"Sorry about that," the actress said, her tone making her sound sincere instead of her usual condescension. "I don't like ignoring fans." She let out a cool breath before smoothing down the bottom part of her black trench coat and readjusting her dark orange scarf that hung on her shoulders. "So, where were we?" Bailey pursed her lips in thought, then raised an eyebrow. "Oh yeah. What are all of you doing here?"

"We're here to try one of the supposedly best pastries out here, as Raj claims." Sheldon answered stoically, jerking his head towards Raj's direction. "They say one of the best pastries, I refute it and say that it has one of the longest, most insufferable lines I've ever had to endure."

Raj pouted moving over to Howard who frowned. "Raj said that you haven't even tried the food yet, and yet you're already so critical." Raj whispered something again. "And that it has to be good for it to have a line."

Bailey blinked, "is that the only reason why Mr. Genius is acting all annoyed?"

The three men nodded while Sheldon growled, "it's  _Doctor!_ "

The dark haired actress nonchalantly smiled, ignoring Sheldon's protest. "Oh. Well it's your lucky day, I'm actually here cause Sparkly asked me to meet him here." She eyed the stroller thar had the sleeping twins in it. "He's been here since an hour ago, and he's pretty mad cause I'm late. I'm sure that seeing the twins will get me a fast pass to forgiveness." She placed a hand on the stroller and gestured for them to follow her, "come on. Knowing Sparkly, he's probably at a table by his lonesome self thinking of what pastry  _won't_  ruin his figure."

Leonard gingerly looked around, trying to check if any of the people in line were mad that they had gotten a fast pass inside. "Uh, Bailey, are you sure it's okay to cut in line?"

Bailey glanced over her shoulder, "yeah. For one, Gregg and I know the owner, plus we're regular customers, so we don't really wait in line when we eat here. They just kind of usher us to a table. And, like I said, Gregg always has a whole table to himself, and I don't think he'd mind you guys joining—he'd actually be ecstatic. He loves company. Oh, and if they were to get mad at you, they should be mad at Gregg for holding up a table that could seat a new group of people for an hour that's effectively ruining the flow of people getting inside to eat then leaving so that new people can sit down and eat." She opened the outdoor seating area's door with her free hand, then pushed the twins' stroller inside.

Howard's mouth fell slightly agape at what Bailey said, then turned to Leonard and Raj. "Remember when we said that Amy was too much like Sheldon?" The two nodded. "Well, we were wrong. It's really Bailey, except she's the much tolerable version of Sheldon."

"She is  _nothing_  like me," protested Sheldon who stopped in his tracks just to glare at them. "If you ask me, she's more like Missy, but she is  _nothing_  like me. I'd have to lose four inches and a handful of braincells to be like her."

"Hey!" Bailey called from the door, a small frown on her face. "Are you coming or not?"

"Demanding," Raj mumbled as the four of them stalked towards the impatient dark haired actress. "Just like Sheldon."

Bailey waited for them to get inside then gestured for them to follow her to a booth at the very end of the restaurant, where a thoughtful Gregg sat, staring down at the menu. "Look at him. He's probably been doing that the entire time that he's been here, which has been over an hour." They moved in front of the table, and Gregg simply ignored them. "See? He's just sitting there, going through the special menu that lists all of the nutrition facts that each pastry has." Bailey stared at Gregg for another moment before snapping her fingers, "Gregory, hey! I'm here!"

Slowly, Gregg's head lifted and instead of his usual charming smile, there was a deep venomous frown on his face.

"Yeah, yeah, you're mad that I'm late," Bailey started, holding her hands up in defense, "but I had to finish that Mexican soap opera that I'm closely following. Miguel just cheated on Anita with Teresa, and Anita's getting back at him by going out with Alonzo. It's pretty intense, if you ask me."

Gregg gave her a look of disbelief then gasped at the sight of the four men awkwardly standing behind Bailey. "Oh, hey! You guys are here." He searched around before noticing the stroller at the front of the table that sat two sleeping toddlers. "And the twins! Bailey, why didn't you tell me you were bringing them here?" He gestured towards the empty seats then patted the one beside him. "Sit! Then order anything you want that you think won't ruin your figure!"

Leonard, Raj and Howard occupied the booth opposite Gregg, while Bailey took a seat beside her friend, leaving the solo chair for Sheldon to sit on.

Sheldon stared at the wooden chair with disgust then grabbed the wipes from his bag, and proceeded to furiously wipe the seat of the chair until it sparkled.

"If what I think he's doing is true," Gregg said, watching the physicist bend down to wipe the chair clockwise. "Then Penny's stories are spot on. He's really interesting!"

The standing physicist dragged a finger down the seat then scrutinized the pad of his finger. Huffing, he sat down on the chair and frowned. "This is less than satisfactory, but I have an inkling feeling that those booths' cushions are far worse than the uncomfortable solid surface of this wooden chair." He wiggled his bottom against the surface, "it is impossible to find a proper spot. How disappointing, but this will do." He gave each of them a forced smile, then pulled the double stroller beside him.

"Okay, now that Sheldon's settled, why don't we order?" Gregg offered, smiling at the still awkward looking men. "Have you guys had lunch? Are you hungry for dinner or just a snack? The food is great, but the desserts are better."

Bailey's eyes scanned the menu before roughly passing it to Sheldon, who sent her a glare. "Gregg and Raj weren't lying. They have great desserts here and have a great variety of it, too. Do you guys have anything in mind? I recommend everything in the menu except their triple chocolate cake. It's so sweet that two bites might get you a shoo in for diabetes." She waved her hand up, calling on a waiter to get their order. It took a second before the waiter arrived, but not before asking the two actors to sign his notepad. "I'll have the blueberry cheesecake, two mini servings of apple strudel—preferably sliced horizontally into bite sized pieces—earl grey tea and Gregg will have the carrot cake. And a bottle of water for everyone." Her eyes shifted to the men sitting in front of her. "What will you guys have?"

"I'll have the slice of apple pie, the special tea," Sheldon stoically said, handing the menu to the waiter. "And the Chewbacca chewy cookies."

Leonard cleared his throat, and did what Sheldon did, "I'll have the apple pie, as well." Raj leaned over to him to whisper. "Raj will have a platter of the Java the Hutt cookies, and what will you have, Howard?" The engineer took one last glance at the menu before sliding it down to Sheldon who gave it to the waiter. "I'll try the brownies—without nuts, please. I'm allergic."

Andy slowly opened his eyes, yawning softly as he took in his surroundings. Once he realized that he was somewhere he didn't know, he turned his head towards his twin, roughly smacking his hand in her arm to wake her up. "Maddie! Maddie! Wake up!"

Maddie—who was cherishing her nap—opened a single blue eye at her brother and grumbled. "Maddie seeping. Go away."

"Maddie," Andy cried, still unable to comprehend why they were in a different place. "We not at sun-sine cen-tah!"

Sheldon ignored Gregg and Bailey's conversation about whether or not carrot cake would ruin his diet and tilted his head down to see Andy desperately waking his twin up. "Andy," he called, getting the restless toddler's attention, "why are you waking your sister up?" The toddler grinned at the sight of their temporary de-facto guardian and lifted his arms up. Complying, Sheldon unbuckled his seatbelt and lifted Andy to the empty space beside Bailey.

"—but I've been going on a strict diet for a week, now, and I think all of these might break that."

"Then why did you ask me to meet you here, in the first place?" Bailey hissed before feeling something tugging on the sleeve of her coat. Turning to her left, she saw Andy staring up at her with happy blue eyes. "Andy, you're awake!" She quickly picked the toddler up and placed him on her lap, "I got you and your sister's favorites! Apple strudel!"

"You like apple strudel?" Sheldon asked to the toddler, who nodded in response. "Aun-teh Bay-wee and Uncah Gwegg ah-ways give Andy, Maddie and mommy ah-pah stoo-dah!"

There was a shuffling noise coming from the stroller, and Sheldon peeked to see that Maddie was awake. Unbuckling the seat belt, he lifted Maddie from the stroller and placed her on the empty space beside Bailey. The toddler's nose barely reached the table, and Sheldon sighed, picking her back up and placing her on his right lap. He normally didn't like either of the toddlers touching him too long, but he did not trust the booster seats or the highchairs in the restaurant. Knowing toddlers that he did not know, they would most definitely had slobbered all over the trays of the highchairs as well as dumping their food on them. Then those booster seats were abused by various children who no longer fit in a highchair who had accidents, and he was sure that the staff never did anything to sanitize them. He was not risking the chance of Maddie (and Andy) getting infected by the bacteria that swarmed those chairs and thus, he would make a sacrifice. He would allow Maddie—this once—to sit on his wonderful lap. Like a child foolishly sitting on Santa's lap thinking that they would get a present if they believed in Saturnalia.

Sheldon barely noticed Leonard, Howard and Raj exchange looks as he shifted Maddie on his lap. "Good afternoon, it seems you've finally woken up," he greeted the still drowsy toddler who had tilted her head all the way back to look up at him through sleepy eyes. If Maddie continued to stay in that position, her neck might get stiff, and that was not good. He gently pushed her head back to it's normal position, and noticed the questioning glances that his friends—Bailey and Gregg were still arguing about the carrot cake—were sending him. He raised an eyebrow as the waiter returned with all of their orders and placed each in front of them. Once the waiter left (and Bailey and Gregg were still arguing) he sent them a withering look before dragging a plate of sliced apple strudel. "Bailey said that you liked this."

"—the carrot cake's already here, Gregg!" Bailey growled in annoyance, taking the other plate of apple strudel and sliding it in front of Andy. "So, eat it or else."

Gregg grumbled, dramatically raising his hand to meld back a stray hair that hung above his eyebrows. "I have to retain the figure, Bailey. I didn't work out all week just to lose to sweets." He protruded his lips as he picked his fork up and shoveled into the carrot cake and took a bite. "There isn't any flavor! I should have gotten the red velvet one. Oh! Screw the diet!" Gregg pushed the plate away from him and stabbed his fork in Bailey's cheesecake and took a bite. "Yup. Bon Voyage diet, and bye bye Steel Samurai costume."

"Steel Samurai?!" The three men gasped in shock, while Raj squeaked.

"Uncah Gwegg da Steh Sam-wai!" Andy chirped before taking a bite of an apple strudel piece.

"You're the Steel Samurai?!" The three men exclaimed, eyes wide and mouths agape while Raj squeaked, again.

Gregg glanced at Bailey who was eating the cheesecake, barely paying attention to the new conversation. "Yeah, I've been playing the Steel Samurai even before I got my breakthrough role in Lies and A Truth. I haven't quit the show, ever since" The four men's—even stoic Sheldon—mouths dropped in awe. "That's why I've been trying to maintain my diet. I'm afraid that I won't be able to fit in my costume, anymore."

 _The Steel Samurai: Warrior of Neo Olde Tokyo_  was a live-action adaptation of a famous anime called Meta Brothers that was a spinoff of a famous visual novel-slash-game. But unlike the original anime, the show was centered around the Steel Samurai and his quest to defend his country from the evil Evil Magistrate. Alongside him was his side kick, the Jamming Ninja, a ninja who had an enchanting singing ability that could get animals to join forces with him, who was also on a mission to save his beloved Princess Misola that the Evil Magistrate often kidnapped. Another lead character was the Steel Samurai's rival turned friend, the Pink Princess that often brought along her adopted younger brother, the Nickel Samurai, that was searching for his long lost metal brothers, Aluminum and Tin Samurai. The show was originally intended to be a children's show, but it turned out to be widely famous to all ages and had garnered a large cult following that allowed the show to expand vastly. Now, there were video games, toys, apparel, board games, food, memorabilia, themed household items and even an upcoming movie.

"Da Steh Sam-wai da best!' Maddie commented, biting down on a big piece of strudel that smeared the corners of her mouth.

Sheldon cringed from above her head and immediately grabbed a napkin to wipe the sauce and the crumbs off of her mouth. It was annoying how much the toddler was like her mother with her knack of disorganization, and eating like a slob. Andy usually ate properly while Maddie often made a mess. She didn't throw her food like what other toddlers did, she was just a really messy eater. Spilled milk from her cereal, spilled juice even from her sippy cup, spilled oatmeal, droppings of pieces of food—it was endless, and like always, reminded him of their mother. Well, Penny did it on purpose to annoy him, and he doubt that Maddie was as taunting as the older blonde. Unless, Penny had corrupted her children beforehand into irritating him by eating messily like she had before—but, he doubted that Penny would be crafty enough to think of doing that. She could have, but there really was no point of making her children do it unless she could see it. "Yes, that's nice. Now, don't talk with your mouth full."

"I can't believe I'm talking to the Steel Samurai!" Howard remarked, a wide grin on his face as he turned to Leonard and Raj then to Gregg who had an amused look on his face. "You don't understand, we're  _all_  fans of the show! Even Sheldon! We have countless merchandise, and we haven't missed a single episode. Anime and live action western version!"

Sheldon looked up from Maddie, nodding in agreement. "Even I appreciate the wonderful work that is the Steel Samurai: Warrior of Neo Olde Tokyo. We've been fans since it became the anime spin off and the live action one you're currently starring in. We have trading cards, costumes, board games, video games, toys, apparel, collectible plastic replicas of the weaponry, and everything else we can get our hands on." He pulled his phone from his pocket, unlocking it and showing Gregg his wallpaper. "My favorite character is the Evil Magistrate. See? He's my wallpaper. You're Raj's." He pointed a finger towards the astrophysicist who was grinning as he lifted his phone that showed his Steel Samurai wallpaper. "Told you."

Gregg laughed light heartedly, ignoring the annoyed look that Bailey was sending him. "I didn't think that you guys—or any adult—would know the show. The set is right next to the Halfway There set, so the twins watch us film all the time." The four men's mouths dropped, again. "Our set can be visited if you take the tour, but it was always parents and their kids. I've never even seen an adult who likes our show," the flamboyant man admitted, rubbing a hand on the back of his neck. "I've seen the articles about the large cult following, but I've never believed that adults actually like our show."

Bailey lifted an eyebrow, taking one last bite of her cheesecake before sending her best friend a bored expression. "I just realized, you never told me why you wanted me to meet you here,"

Gregg knitted his brows in confusion, trying to think of why he really asked his irritable friend to meet him. His eyes wandered towards the twins who were happily eating their apple strudel, and he suddenly remembered what he had forgotten. "That's right! Bailey, I actually called you here to get you to call them here." He raised a hand and gestured to the four men, then turned back to his friend. "And I must ask, how were you able to sense what I wanted and took one step ahead of me?"

"I just saw them standing outside and asked them to come with me," answered Bailey with an uninterested tone, "I didn't really know anything about what you wanted me to do."

Gregg nodded ecstatically, clapping his hands together and turning to the four men. "You see, The Steel Samurai: Warrior of Neo Olde Tokyo, is having this meet and greet event that we're holding at the studio." The four men's eyes lit up in excitement in what they were about to hear. "It's a tour at the set, then a meet and greet with the cast, then a special show will be performed that will be aired as our show's hundredth episode. It's an open event, and is going to be really fun—and I wanted to get Bailey to inform you about it so that the twins can come. Are you guys free to bring the twins at our studios on Saturday? I promise to give you a fun time."

"Are you kidding?" Leonard asked, still in awe at the fact that they were talking to the actual Americanized version of the live action adaptation of the original anime. "We'll make our schedules free! Are adults allowed to join?"

"Of course! Everyone of all ages can come if they want to." Gregg shrugged, combing his hands through his hair and brushing it upwards. "I'll give you guys my number so that we can contact each other." He grabbed a pen from his bag, then scribbled his number on a napkin and handed it to Raj who was close to fainting from sheer excitement. "Can you make it there by ten o' clock? I know it's early, but I have a feeling that there's going to be a long line." Sheldon's excitement quickly dropped off the face of the planet at the mention of the line, and Gregg chuckled. "Relax, Sheldon. I'll make sure that you don't have to go through any lines." The physicist perked up, and continued on eating his pie. "Besides, I think you won't have any trouble getting in the studios. The guards at the entrance actually knows the twins since they've had a few adventures around the backlot, that caused Penny to get paranoid and called the assistance of security."

Bailey sullenly nodded, taking a sip of her tea, "it's happened so many times that there isn't a single security personnel that can't recognize them from a mile away. Now, whenever the twins disappear from the set, they return about ten minutes later with one of the guards. The twins have even made friends with our neighboring sets."

"They've even made uncredited cameos in other shows because of it," Gregg added with a grin. "But anyway, as long as you can get there, I'll handle everything else. I've already talked to Penny about it beforehand, and she gave us herconsent. As long as the twins don't get their hands on the official Samurai hot dogs. Allowing them to eat even one of those will ruin their appetite," the two actors shuddered at the memory, "we learned that the hard way, and let's just say that Penny wasn't too happy." The flamboyant man then wistfully sighed in recollection, and even Bailey looked like she heavily regretted it. "Nevertheless, can I expect all of you to go?"

The three men all stared at Sheldon—who was calmly wiping his mouth—for approval. They knew that even if all three of them wanted to go and Sheldon didn't, no one would be going to the awesome meet and greet. Sheldon, too, was a huge fan of the show (he was the biggest fanboy of them all) but when he didn't feel like it, he didn't feel like it. Like when they had the symposium in San Francisco, and all of them wanted to take the plane. But, Sheldon wanted to take the train, and three against one meant they were taking the train. However, they did get to meet  _Summer Glau_  on that train, even if Howard got his phone destroyed by her—but they still got to meet her. However, there was absolutely nothing good about  _not_  going to the meet greet that would be personally escorted by the actual man who played the awesome badass ginormous fan wielding samurai that was actually one of Penny's best friend, who also happened to be a very famous man. The only good thing of not going would be the possible privilege of gloating when Sheldon realized that not going would be the mistake of a lifetime. It didn't even sound as good as it usually would, compared to the meet and greet.

Sheldon placed the napkin down, and lifted his gaze to meet his friend's anxious ones, and Gregg's questioning ones. Then he felt a hand tapping his shoulder, and he looked down to see Maddie grinning. "Sedon go, peas? Da Steh Sam-wai amah-sing! Fun!"

Andy enthusiastically nodded from Bailey's lap, "da Jam en Ninja, fun, too! Go, peas?"

There was a moment of hesitation before Sheldon remembered his life size usable Steel Samurai fan that was displayed on top of his dresser. Not only was it one of the limited five released that already gave it a high value, but getting it signed by Gregg would further heighten it's value. So will getting his rare Evil Magistrate signed. Plus, the idea of getting his picture taken in front of the various backdrops and sets would look great on his Facebook account, and for a personal calendar.

"We'll go," Sheldon collectedly answered, emitting happy responses from both his friends and the twins. "But we better not endure a line like the one we endured outside."

* * *

Leonard went over the merchandise that was spread across the coffee table as Sheldon appeared from his bedroom, carrying his own Steel Samurai items. The tall physicist was wearing his navy blue Evil Magistrate shirt over a grey long sleeved shirt that matched the yellow Steel Samurai shirt that Leonard wore under his layer of jackets. "Are you getting your Steel Samurai fan signed?"

Sheldon smirked, gently placing the merchandise on the beige armchair and dramatically pulled the fan from a linen bag that came with the fan. He spread the fan with a flick of the wrist then gracefully swung it around, imitating the Steel Samurai's signature move.

"Aerial Swing Number Six," Leonard said as his roommate continued the movement. "Originally known as the randomly named  _chousen nakare hitotsu_ , the Steel Samurai's signature move in battle."

The theoretical physicist did one final swing before returning the fan to it's bag. "Impressive, Leonard. I believe you have studied up since our past blunder in the Steel Samurai Bowl where you mistook ASN6—aka  _chousen nakara hitots_ _u_ —for ASN5 or originally known as  _asare nakara mittse_ , the Steel Samurai's commonly used attack to finish an irrelevant battle." He gave Leonard a tight smile then returned to placing the collectibles in his bag. "We might have a fighting chance in this year's bowl if you keep this up."

Andy watched curiously from their playpen as Leonard brought out a fork like thing (another weapon in the show) and started poking the air. "Maddie, wat Uncah Wenad doing?"

Maddie looked up from her xylophone, furrowing her eyebrows at the scene in front of them. This time, Sheldon brought out a plastic sword that was almost as long as his legs and started swinging it at Leonard, who was effectively dodging it with the giant fork. "Maddie dunno. Dat a big foh-owk."

"Leonard, give up," Sheldon said as he swung the Evil Magistrate's sword of regulation against Leonard's replica of the Nickel Samurai's two tined pitch fork like  _thing_. "We both know that the Evil Magistrate trumps the Nickel Samurai every time they meet. Surrender now, and I—the powerful Evil Magistrate—might even tell you where your lost metal brothers are!" Leonard made a faux struggling noise before pushing the weapon upwards with all his strength, and only moving Sheldon's sword by an inch. "Oh come on! Fine, I give up!" He whimpered placing his weapon down on the coffee table and lifting both his arms in the air. "But let it be known that the Nickel Samurai will one day beat the Strawberry Clan  _and_ the Evil Magistrate."

Sheldon contently nodded, taking a seat on his spot while Leonard went to switch the tv into the Skype call to Penny. "Leonard, what do you think is more suitable—not that I really care about your opinion, I'm just torn—a Jamming Ninja or a Steel Samurai visor cap?" He held both caps in the air, "I have yet to buy an Evil Magistrate one, and both heroes effectively ruin my outfit."

Leonard glanced at the items over his shoulder then turned back to tv and using the Xbox to log on to Skype. "Why would you even wear a visor?"

"For one, it's pretty neat, and it might be sunny." Sheldon simply stated, staring at the two caps before choosing one. "I'll just wear the Steel Samurai one. Knowing Wolowitz, he'd be in full Jamming Ninja themed attire."

"That's true. I heard him talking about fixing an outfit that was the exact colors of the Jamming Ninja. White dickie and all," Leonard told him, starting a call to Penny, which she quickly picked up. "Hey Penny, how—are you sick?"

Sheldon lifted his gaze from his mint condition Steel Samurai Fighting Stance action figure and glanced up at the blonde on screen. Penny was in her hotel room; her face was flushed, with dark bags under her eyes, her eyes looked red and watery while her nose was bright red and a comforter was wrapped around her already temperature appropriate clothed body. She looked like she had gone through hell and back. Like when Leonard was supposed to got the Large Hadron Collider, and she had gotten both of them sick. She did the soup cooking and he did any medical checking. The difference was; he was not sick, and a screen, an ocean and thousands of miles away separated him from her enough to not get him sick. "Penny," he started once he found his voice, "two questions; are you sick, or have you been crying? I'd need to be in the room with you to correctly tell if you're sick, and we all know that I can't physically do that."

The blonde grabbed a tissue and blew her nose, causing Sheldon to automatically back away in horror. "I'm sick with the flu, actually," she lightly rubbed her nose with her hand and Sheldon resisted the urge to tell her not to do it. "I think I got it from one of the production staff. Or cause of all the six in the morning training we've been doing." She sniffed and took a sip from a mug, "either way, I'm sick and took the day off. So, how are all of you? I'm assuming that those things are for that kiddie show Gregg stars in? He called me up yesterday saying that you'd be coming to this meet and greet event."

"Penny," Sheldon stated, still somewhat disturbed by the fact that the blonde was sick. He knew that it was impossible to get infected through a screen, but he just couldn't help it. "The Steel Samurai: Warrior of Neo Olde Tokyo isn't just some kiddie show!" He glanced at Leonard who was subtly nodding in agreement. "It's a live action spinoff-slash-adaptation of a critically praised anime that is an adaptation from a famous gameboy and DS game, that deals with the everyday struggle of the titular hero—and his useless sidekick that does nothing but sing—in defending his city and sometimes his country from the devious, yet cunning, Evil Magistrate. Not only does the show have great effects that most live action shows fail to do, it has a realistic feel that differs it from the anime, yet still gives it it's own identity. There is a reason why it has a large cult following, and most of them are the reason why I am a fan."

"Leonard, did Sheldon really just say all that to say that he's a fan?"

The experimental physicist nodded, walking towards the playpen and unlocking it to allow the twins to talk to their mother. "Well, not in that sense. He mainly did that to refute you claim of it being some kiddie show."

"Oh. Well, he could have just said so in the first place instead of adding to this stupid headache I have." The blonde sighed, rubbing a hand at the back of her head as the twins toddled up to the camera. "Good morning, Andy, Maddie."

Andy tilted his head to the side, slightly frowning at the groggy quality of his mother's voice. "Mommy, sick?"

Penny weakly smiled, "yeah, I have the flu. But I'll be healthy again in no time—I just have to rest—and as Sheldon would say—drink plenty of fluids."

Sheldon raised an eyebrow at the screen, "of course I'd tell you to drink plenty of fluids. Why would I suggest that you drink gasses, solids or ionized plasma? Has your sickness already affected your brain, Penny?" The blonde frowned, but it didn't have the intimidating quality it used to have whenever she did not like what he said. It looked more like a tired frown, than one of disapproval. "If so, I suggest you go see the doctor immediately. I'm sure that you can search for the French translation of 'help' on  _Google_."

"I think I can do fine by myself," commented Penny, who tiredly shook her head. "I got a check up from the on-set doctor, and she said that all I needed was rest. Something about fatigue lowering my immune system. So, I'll be fine."

Maddie gasped, shaking her head in disapproval. She may not know what 'fatigue' or 'immune system' meant but she knew that her mother was sick. And that meant one thing. "Mommy sick," the toddler proclaimed, gesturing for her twin to stand closer to her. "Andy and Maddie sing sof' kitty."

"Halt." Sheldon ordered, his voice stern and commanding. "Though I still am unsure of how exactly you children know that song—I do assume, however, that it was your mother who taught it to you—we must establish something vastly important." Both toddlers turned to him and Leonard groaned from the beige armchair. Penny had a weary expression on her face, one that told him that she didn't need his rant right now. It wasn't one of annoyance like it normally was, it was one of actual exhaustion. He then remembered her current health, and quickly back pedaled his thoughts. Suddenly, he recalled the two times that Penny took care of him when he was sick. It gave him an odd sense of nostalgia with how his eidetic memory flashed all of the memories of Penny in his head. This had started a week ago, after Penny's win, when he mentally acknowledged that he missed his former neighbor. It was sudden, but the feeling never left him.

In the two years that he hadn't seen Penny, he never so much as missed her. Kind of. He remembered her often—what couldn't he remember?—each time they played HALO or Age of Conan, and sometimes when they ate dinner and one of the three mentioned the missing presence of the blonde. Mostly, he thought of Penny when Leonard blubbered on how much he missed the blonde that Raj quickly joined in with. However, he never felt a sense of longing in any of those instances. He only  _actually_  missed her after their short conversation. Now, whenever he did something that had a tiny connection to the blonde, he couldn't resist reminiscing about the days when the blonde still forcefully inserted herself in their daily life. Laundry night, HALO night, mooching off of them, mooching off of their wifi, mooching off of their cable, her nonsensical questions and topics of discussion—and most of all, driving him to work when Leonard was either unable to, or was mad at him about something trivial. He had to take the bus whenever Leonard mysteriously disappeared, and when he came back furious at him.

He even missed the Cheesecake Factory and it's terrible service. Immediately after Penny upped and left, he proclaimed that they would  _never_  eat at the restaurant, again. The only reason they ate there was because Penny was their waitress, and only she could touch his food. There was a time when he found Bernadette okay, but then she quit and became a microbiologist that earned more money than the peanuts Howard made. Since then, he had his Tuesday burger at the quaint restaurant that Raj found, where they also bought the twins' food from. Although they had better burgers than the Cheesecake Factory (they always remembered to put the barbecue, bacon and cheese on the side, and no tomatoes) he sometimes missed having his barbecue bacon cheeseburger there, and reprimanding Penny on forgetting the menial task of not adding tomatoes in it. The Green Project did his food so well that he never had a chance to criticize it. It was impressive and saddening at the same time. Plus, they had excellent service that never slacked off.

Life without the blonde was actually easier than Leonard claimed it to be—minus the having to ride the bus to work. Their apartment no longer suffered the likes of  _Jersey Shore_ , or  _the Kardashians_ , or Penny's silly antics such as dancing. Their pantry no longer got scrounged by the blonde's mooching ways, nor did their fridge. Though, Leonard got all mopey (which was one of the main reasons why he grew a dislike for the blonde) he no longer designed his futile plans of getting Penny to fall in love with him. Or get back together with him. Raj could now speak without difficulty when at their apartment, except when Amy came over. He now became the undefeated HALO champion, and had a peaceful time at playing Age of Conan. He really didn't see the 'missing thing' that Raj and the others kept on pointing out, but looking over the past two years, again, he did notice how it was a little less lively without the blonde. Plus, when he got sick, he had to take care of himself since the others were all unreachable. He had to sing soft kitty to himself to get better, and it didn't sound as comforting as he thought.

Sheldon heaved a heavy sigh as he glanced at the twins' unsure faces, then at Penny's sickly appearance. He was growing too soft. "I—soft kitty is  _only_  for when you're sick." The twins stared up at him, waiting for what he was going to say. "Clearly, your mother is sick. Which means that you have to sing soft kitty to her."

"Sof' kitty!"

"Mommy, Andy sing sof' kitty!"

"Really?"

"What's soft kitty?" Leonard asked, his eyebrows slightly furrowed.

"It's a song for when you're sick. Don't pay much mind to it," Sheldon quickly answered, handing Leonard the rare collectible Jamming Ninja iconic red guitar that they bought together. "Should we get just the Jamming Ninja to sign this, or the whole Magatama gang?"

Maddie cleared her throat and counted to three before singing along with Andy.  _"Sof' kitty, wahm kitty, 'itah bah of fuh, happy kitty, seepy kitty, puh, puh, puh."_

Sheldon tuned Leonard out, and listened to the mispronounced version of his sick song. He saw Penny smile warmly at them from the screen and sighed, again. He really wasn't happy that someone other than him knew the song—much less, Penny—but he supposed that he could let it go for now. He tore his gaze from the screen and caught up with Leonard's reasoning on who they should get to sign the guitar. "I must admit, you are right, getting all of the actors to sign will make it's value heighten."

"Hey, Sheldon," the blonde called, sounding much chipper than before. "Thanks for letting me hear soft kitty."

"Don't be ridiculous," the theoretical physicist huffed, handing the rest of the items to Leonard. "You are sick, and the song is befitting. I also had nothing to do with it as it was your children who sang it to you." The smile on Penny's face was irking him. "I suggest that you go and rest to further recuperate."

The blonde nodded through the screen, a smile still on her face. "Alright. I'm feeling much better now, but I'll listen to tour suggestion. I can tell that you're excited to see Gregg's show and I'm stalling you guys." She waved at the screen, and the twins waved back. "Thanks for the song, guys. I'll talk to you, soon." She sent them one last smile before disconnecting the call.

Sheldon stared at the screen for another moment before picking up the mint condition Pink Princess action figure and handing it to Leonard. "Don't forget this one. Signed Pink Princess toys are worth much more than the male warrior ones."

"Hey guys," Raj greeted as he walked through the front door, Howard trailing behind him. "Are you ready for some Steel Samurai?"

Howard grinned, gesturing to his themed outfit that consisted of a white dickie underneath a blue long sleeved shirt, over navy blue pants and red shoes. "The real life Jamming Ninja is here!" He swung the iconic red guitar from his back, and started strumming on it. "Song of Hearts; reprise!"

"Wow, you guys are really dressed up," Leonard commented, glancing at Raj's outfit that was in the colors of the Nickel Samurai. "Sheldon and I were thinking of doing that, too, but we remembered our shirts. But we got the twins to wear the Pink Princess and Jamming Ninja shirts we bought them yesterday." He zipped the bag filled the collectibles and slung the strap over his shoulder. "Sheldon, you ready to go? This is gonna be a  _big_  day!"

Sheldon stood from his spot, grabbing his own bag of items then proceeded to carry Maddie. "It's not just a big day, this will be the day that we will fight alongside the Magatama!" The four men enthusiastically raised an arm and did a battle cry that only confused both of the twins.

* * *

Bailey clucked her tongue in slight annoyance as she stood beside Gregg in front of the Steel Samurai: Warrior of Neo Olde Tokyo's studio. She did not have any intentions of going with him to the meet and greet, and instead planned to spend the day catching up to all of the shows she watched. Sadly, at nine sharp, the flamboyant man appeared in front of her doorstep—like a wild Ratata or Tentacool from  _Pokemon_  that no one wanted to encounter—excitedly demanding that she get ready to join the 'fun.' Since she was so nice, she obediently complied, but not without mocking the show he starred in.

"Do you think that they got lost?" Gregg worriedly asked, fixing a stray hair that had separated from the moussed light brown hair that was stylishly brushed upwards. Gregg  _was_  known for his great hair. "I told the guards beforehand to bring them directly here at the studio. What if they arrived early, didn't see us and went back home?"

The dark haired woman raised an eyebrow, "Sparkly, you're overreacting. It's only been ten minutes, we're not late. You're too anxious, today. You haven't had coffee, yet, have you?"

Gregg's hazel eyes flared, and Bailey sighed; whipping her phone out to text one of the staff to get her friend a cup of coffee. Whenever Gregg didn't have his early morning coffee, his dramatic perkiness died out and was replaced by dramatic crankiness. "Well maybe if you didn't take half an hour to choose an outfit from your wardrobe that consists of all black, maybe we could have gotten here earlier!"

Bailey glanced down at her outfit; a black jacket over a black turtleneck, over a pair of dark jeans. Since everyone knew that the only colors she wore was black, it meant that Gregg was getting paranoid with the way he freaked out over her choice of clothing. She changed the order of a cup of coffee to three; two for Gregg, one for her. "Hey don't put the blame on me, I'm not the one who needed to apply makeup even though he doesn't even need makeup."

"Maybe if you put some makeup on you wouldn't look like that ghost girl from  _the Ring!_ " Gregg snapped, running an agitated hand through his styled hair. He then started pacing, until the Halfway There staff member arrived with the coffee that calmed him down. After two cups, Gregg relaxed and brought out his phone. "Oh, they just texted me saying that they're here."

"You are so weird," Bailey plainly said, taking a sip of her coffee as a go,f cart arrived with the aforementioned people. "I told you we weren't late," she took one last sip before dumping the styrofoam cup into the trash. "Well, good morning to all of you," she greeted as the men hopped of the golf cart one by one then placed the stroller filled with the toddlers on the ground. The twins waved at her and Gregg, and they both waved back before she stepped towards the men. "Is there a particular reason why you're fifteen minutes late?"

The three men stared accusingly at the mute man who had a sheepish look on his face.

"We just had to stop over at a convenience store," Sheldon dully answered, glancing at Raj. On the way to the studio, Raj realized something very important; there was a big chance that a woman might talk to him—like a production assistant who might ask him for his information that would be needed in order to join the official Magatama club that was now also open for adults. After countless tries of insisting that they get him at least a can of beer, Sheldon agreed and they stopped over for Raj's drink. They took a little bit longer because the twins wanted snacks and they had to scrutinize which would be okay for an infant with a very strict mother—who was also intimidating and could easily kill them, shall they give them junk food—to eat. In the end, they got them fruits and fruit juice that they made sure wasn't artificial. Then when they arrived at the studios, Raj supposedly saw the star of something called  _'Pretty Little Liars'_  and insisted that they go after her. Which turned out to be a random woman who was touring the studio, and in turn nearly called Raj a pervert. Luckily, they ran across a security guard who recognized the twins, and brought them here. "That was it."

"I'm glad that you're finally here," Gregg smiled, crushing the cup in his hand before tossing it in the trashcan. "I thought that Bailey's indecisiveness had caused us to arrive later than you, causing all of you to leave." He wiped his hands on a napkin that Bailey handed him, then glanced at the various life sized replicas that the men were carrying. "Are you getting to get those signed?" The four men eagerly nodded, and Gregg handed him a stack of post-its and a pen. "Then, we should head over to the studio. The rest of the cast is already there, rehearsing for the show later. I can get them signed for you while we wait for the meet and greet to start. Put your name on those papers and attach it to the items that you want to get signed. Don't want to get a mix up." He motioned for one of the guys who was driving the golf cart to come over, then gestured to the items. "Could you get those to the dressing room and tell them to sign it for me? Then tell them that I'll be with them after a bit, and that I just have to finish things." The guard nodded, carefully taking the items from the guys and placed it in the golf cart before driving off.

"Watch Jam en Ninja, now?" Andy asked from the stroller, a hand gripping a bottle of apple juice.

Maddie swallowed the cracker she was chewing on, and snatched the bottle from her brother's hand and drank it down. Once she washed the cracker down, she sent her twin an affronted look. "Maddie no want Jam en Ninja. Maddie want Steh Sam-wai! Da Steh Sam-wai da bestest!"

Raj faked coughed, "The Nickel Samurai is the best," then avoided the glances the rest of the adults were sending him.

"You're all wrong," Sheldon stated, folding his arms over his chest. "The Evil Magistrate is clearly the best, or else someone would've beat him by now." He saw Gregg raise his eyebrows, and he cleared his throat. "No offense to Gregg, of course. Your portrayal of the lovable—yet gullible, as always—hero is remarkable, but there is just something about the Evil Magistrate that makes me biased."

Howard leaned over to Leonard, "must be the one accident waiting to happen that's talking to him."

"Or the dark side," Leonard suggested, causing him and Howard to stifle a laugh.

"Oh, it's okay," Gregg chuckled, gesturing for them to follow him to one of the studios. "My personal favorite is the Pink Princess—cause there's just something so dramatic about her that I like. I do love my character, of course. But I'm just one of those people whose favorite isn't the hero—or anything canon—and prefer the one that isn't everyone's favorite. Plus, the Pink Princess costume is so much lighter than the Steel Samurai's." He stopped in front of a set of double doors and grinned, "everyone, hold your breath—except Bailey cause oxygen is the only thing that keeps you lively—because we're about to enter the world of Neo Olde Tokyo!"

With a push, he opened the doors and revealed the various realistic ancient Japanese architecture—and the line that formed due to the people taking pictures.

Sheldon frowned, turning to Gregg, "you said that there wasn't going to be a line."

Bailey looked around, scanning the line that spanned from one of the makeshift towers to a plaza to a forest to a paper house to a green screen, and back. "Mr. Genius—"

"—it's  _Doctor_ —"

"Yeah, yeah,  _Dr. Genius_  here is right," the dark haired actress pointed out as Gregg placed a hand on his forehead. "The show starts at eleven, but seeing that line, I doubt that they'd be able to take pictures here and get to the performance area in time for your fancy little special episode."

"We can wait in line," Howard insisted, even though he found the line to be as long as the Great Wall. He saw the others cringe—and Sheldon mentally shoot lasers from his eyes at the people—and sucked in a breath. All three men sent him different messages by simply looking at him. Raj's said, "what the hell, dude? Are you freaking crazy?" Leonard's said, "you have got to be kidding me!" And Sheldon's said, "if you think you will subject me to, again, enduring this irrelevant line, then you are wrong. This is beneath me, and shall you force me to do such, you will be awarded a hefty number of strikes that will permanently affect your guest record. Tread lightly."

"Yeah... we can wait in line."

There was a series of muffled protests, followed by Sheldon vehemently shaking his head. "No. Absolutely  _not!_  Have you seen that line, Howard? That line is longer than the one at the Avenger's midnight premiere!" The theoretical physicist waved his lanky arms to gesture at the line then did the Evil Magistrate's Rejection Swipe that consisted of swiping the arms across the air, making an X then pointing upwards. A couple of the people in line clapped once Sheldon finished the move, then he barked at the people to mind their own business. Had they not been at a place filled with people who knew what the hell he was doing, he would have looked crazier than he already was. "Gregg! You promised that there wouldn't be any lines. What is your excuse?"

Gregg narrowed his hazel eyes as he searched the room, clucking his tongue before frantically waving his arm to call on a production assistant. "Mr. Wilkes! I heard that you were finishing something first before heading over here."

"Aren't we holding people off from the actual set until the meet and greet?" Gregg asked, panic evident in his pitchy voice. "I was planning on touring my friends around the set cause I thought that the picture taking activity was to be held outside at the makeshift set for the show. Why is everything going all wrong?" He dramatically asked, turning to Bailey who was sending him a look of embarrassment. "Sparkly, you're getting too overdramatic. The set doesn't leave—you know that—and they can easily come back another day to take pictures. I think that the meet and greet is more important than this."

"We're sorry Mr. Wilkes," the assistant started, scribbling something on her clipboard, "a fan somehow got in the studio and led the rest inside. It's out of control, and we're doing our best to handle it. We've been thinking of moving the meet and greet earlier so that the fans will divert their attention to that. For now, I hope you and your friends don't mind waiting at the makeshift set," the woman lowered her voice, cautiously turning her head to make sure that no one would hear, "cause that's where the meet and greet will be at."

"Fine," Gregg exasperatedly sighed, "I'll just tour you here some other time. At least, that wouldn't have any lines, and you'd even get to try the green screen." The four men perked up while Bailey still frowned. "We'll head to the makeshift set. Oh, and could you please put my friends at the start of the list of the meet and greet? Bailey, here, won't be happy if the twins get smothered by people."

The production assistant nodded, moving over to the four men and handing them the clipboard. "Write in your names so that I can personally get you when the meet and greet starts." The adults complied, writing their names down and handing the clipboard back to the lady. "Alright, then. I'll fetch your friends when the meet and greet starts, Mr. Wilkes. And don't forget to get in to costume right after the meet and greet—the show starts right after it." The lady sent Gregg a smile before walking off.

"Wait, I thought that you got their things beforehand so that the cast can sign their things? If you and their collectibles aren't there during the meet and greet, what exactly is it?" Bailey inquired, checking on her plum colored nails.

"Good question, Bailes," Gregg said, placing a hand on the twins' stroller and leading them out to the makeshift set outside the studio. "You see, the difference between the meet and greet and me personally getting their things signed is that the meet and greet signatures are only the character names, whilst mine is getting the actual actors to sign it. The meet and greet is practically just a photo op with the costumed body doubles, and a chance to hug them." They exited the studio and stopped at a clear space that had the same backgrounds and rows of chairs in front. "Welcome to where the special show will be held. Pretty cool, huh?"

Maddie gasped from the stroller, her eyes going wide at the newly built set. "Maddie no go dah be-foh!"

"Dis new pace," Andy added as he scanned the wide set that replicated the one inside the studio. "Dat da Jam en Ninja house!"

Howard dug through his pocket to get his phone, taking a picture of the set. "This is so awesome!" He turned to Gregg, excitedly grinning at the actor. "Is it okay for us to pose and take pictures there?"

"Yeah, of course! Take as many as you want," Gregg watched as Raj pulled out a retracted monopod—from somewhere he didn't want to know—extending out and attaching a camera on top of it. Raj placed the camera in the middle of the audience seating then giddily ran back to them. "Guys, I downloaded an app on my phone that let's me control the camera's timer from my phone! We can take as much as we want!"

Leonard and Howard grinned at Raj, then took the twins out of their stroller with full intention of including them in the pictures. "Sheldon," Leonard called, adjusting Maddie on his hip, "aren't you going to come with us?"

Sheldon's eyes slightly narrowed, sending his roommate a scathing look. "That is a makeshift set, therefore it is not the actual set where the show is filmed, thus making it irrelevant." He frowned completely when he realized that his words were not being understood by his friends, and that their excitement had not died down. "I'll pass. I'd rather wait to go to the actual set than take pictures in a set that will be torn apart after the show."

Leonard blinked, then grinned at his roommate, "okay, then! We'll see you later!" The three of them waved before hurriedly making their way to the temporary set, excitedly chattering on how the pictures would look so cool.

"So," Bailey hummed from beside Gregg, who was watching the others in amusement, "want some coffee?"

Sheldon stared at the dark haired actress for a moment then shrugged. "I don't drink coffee. I do, however, drink tea."

* * *

"So, Sheldon, did you know that I have a boyfriend?"

Sheldon looked up from his tea filled styrofoam cup, raising an eyebrow at Gregg's statement. "Yes, you informed me of it when we were at Penny's award show party. If I'm not mistaken—which I'm not—he owned the restaurant that we ate at."

Gregg happily nodded, "that's right! We've been together for five years now, and we're thinking of either adopting or having a kid. What's your thoughts about that?"

"I've thought of having one via in-vitro fertilization and a surrogate up until Leonard said that I shouldn't." He still considered the idea of having progeny via the scientific way regardless of Leonard constantly telling him that he shouldn't. What Leonard's problem was about it, he didn't know. It wasn't like there was something wrong about it. Though his mother would reprimand him for 'not doing it the way Jesus told them to do it' he was sure that she would be ecstatic to have a grandchild. In contrast to his roommate, his mother had been prodding him to 'give' her grandchildren ever since Junior gave her one. It really was a win-win situation—his mother getting a grandchild, and him not doing it the messy way—and he would surely go through with it in the near future. Maybe, a little after he won the Nobel so that his progeny would be inspired by his success. "You should ask Penny to be your surrogate—her broad hips and corn fed vigor will surely house your offspring well."

"Oh, she'd house it well, alright," Gregg quickly answered before giving Bailey a look that Sheldon once again did not understand. "Anyway—you seem to think that Penny's a good choice for a surrogate. Why don't you get her to be your surrogate?"

"Why in the world would I choose her as my surrogate?" Sheldon squawked, clearly affronted by the question.

"Cause you suggested it, genius," Bailey snarked, placing her cup down on the empty seat beside her. "And hey, what's wrong with getting Penny as a surrogate? She's a bit too bubbly for my taste, but even you admitted that she's remarkable."

"Penny already has two children of her own," replied Sheldon, taking another sip of tea. "Asking her to bear another one that isn't one of her own seems to be a bit unreasonable." The two friends shared another knowing look that was getting on Sheldon's nerves. These two had their own language that was built mainly on widening the eyes and moving the eyebrows. What he wanted to know was if they were talking about him. They could have been planning on killing him and he didn't even know it. "And, that was a simple observation-slash-opinioned suggestion for you, not me. You did ask me for my opinion, did you not?"

Gregg smiled slightly, leaning back onto his chair. "True—but, let's change the topic. Bailey and I were talking the other day and we noticed that the twins are very fond of you." The three of them glanced towards the stage where the makeshift set and the others were. Raj was at the front, adjusting the camera on the monopod while Leonard and Howard were practicing the poses they would do. At their side was Andy and Maddie who were imitating what the adults were doing. Andy turned to do the swinging move that Leonard was doing, but stopped when he saw the three adults staring at them, tapping his sister's shoulder then waving happily at them. "It's  _really_  interesting cause the twins actually dislike strangers."

Sheldon turned to the flamboyant man, sending him a look of confusion and Bailey continued. "What Sparkly said is true. The twins really don't react well to strangers unless Penny was the one who introduced the stranger to them. It took them about a month before they got used to us."

What the dark haired woman said was true; the twins really did not react kindly to strangers. Looking back at it now, the twins never warmed up quickly to any of the strangers he introduced to them. They barely spoke when Mrs. Gunderson was talking to them; meeting Amy was one of the awkwardest scenes he and Bernadette had ever seen, they barely acknowledged Stuart, and it took a while before they got used to smiling Brenda. Kripke, however, was a different story, as they somehow connected due to their misuse of the letter W. Though they were usually energetic, happy and friendly infants, but that did not apply to strangers. Maddie even went as far as stopping Andy from talking to Kripke when they first met him. But, if they didn't like strangers... why didn't they shy away from him? He was considered as a stranger—as they never met before—yet they liked him from the start. Well, he really was such a likable person.

"How long did it take for them to get used to you?" Bailey faced him, a curious look on her face.

"They didn't. They liked me from the start," he answered, recalling how from the very first week, the twins often tried to get his attention, which led to Andy and Maddie's stumble in the apartment. "But it isn't surprising, as I am truly an amazing person."

Gregg chortled, causing Bailey and Sheldon to glare at him. "It's so entertaining how narcissistic the two of you are! You're really long lost siblings!" The flamboyant man dodged the punch to the shoulder that Bailey was about to do as the costumed Steel Samurai characters came out of the studio, followed by the previous production assistant walking up towards them. "Mr. Wilkes! The meet and greet is about to start—we've told the audience about it, too." She glanced down at her clipboard then settled her gaze on the physicist beside the two actors. "He's one of the guys on the list, right? We've placed you at the start of the list. Please follow me."

"You should take the twins with you," Gregg suggested, standing from the chair and glancing around the area. "The audience might be flowing from the studio any minute now. You should get going."

Sheldon frowned at him before silently standing up and making his way to the stage where the others were. Knowing his friends, they'd rather take photos for their Facebook rather than taking a picture with the actual costumed characters. He stopped in front of the posing adults who were ignoring him as they took pictures, and turned to the twins. "The meet and greet is starting, and I'll be bringing you along with me."

The toddlers grinned at each other, jumping up and down in excitement. "Andy want pic-cha wid Jam en Ninja!"

Maddie raised her hands up to Sheldon, and he lifted her up. "Sedon! Take pic-cha wid Steh Sam-wai too, peas!"

"We're going to take a picture with all of them," Sheldon stated as they walked down the steps, grabbing hold of Andy's hand as he jumped on each step. "Andy, you really have to be careful. Your mother won't be happy if you get hurt again." The toddler simply let out a giggle, stopping at the second to the last step and taking one big jump to the ground. "Andy not get hurt! Cos' Sedon no make Andy booboo!"

"I didn't really understand anything you said, but I'll take that as a compliment," he gave the two toddlers a small smile before walking towards the production assistant. "Okay, you're the first here so you can start the meet and greet with any characters you like. The pictures will be given once you've taken one with each character." The lady gestured to the start of the line and unhooked the rope from the post. "Enjoy, and I'll meet you at the end to give you your pictures."

The first character was The Jamming Ninja who Andy immediately approached, which the mascot responded by lifting the toddler up for the picture. After Andy—Maddie didn't like the character and refused to take a solo one with him—Sheldon took a picture with the mascot while the toddlers went up to the Nickel Samurai. They each took a solo picture with the mascot, then moved on to the Pink Princess which Andy refused to take a picture with, saying that he didn't like pink. When they reached the Evil Magistrate, Sheldon took four solo pictures with him before the photographer told him to move on to the last. He originally wanted to take twelve (to make a calendar) but four was good enough, and with the number of pictures he got with the other characters, he could make a Steel Samurai: Warrior of Neo Olde Tokyo calendar instead. All that was left was the Steel Samurai.

"Andy take pic-cha Steh Sam-wai, wid Sedon, peas?"

Maddie nodded from his arm, "Maddie, too! Maddie and Andy no pic-cha wid Sedon!"

The Steel Samurai mascot—which wasn't Gregg as he was talking to Bailey—waved to them, gesturing for them to stand beside him. Sheldon sighed, grabbing Andy's hand as they moved closer to the mascot. "Sedon," Andy called, tugging softly on his hand, "Andy up, too?"

"You want me to carry you?" The toddler nodded. "I thought that you weren't an infant, and only infants want to get carried." Andy blinked, barely understanding what he had said, and raised his hands towards him. Sheldon wondered why the mini Penny suddenly wanted to get carried. He never wanted it before, and always chose to walk (toddle, skip and stumble) beside them. The only time he didn't walk by his own was when he was in their stroller, or when one of the others chose to carry him. But the big question was, could he really manage to carry both of the toddlers?! Leonard had done it before, but it took five minutes before he grew weak and set Andy down. Howard could only carry one of them and he never saw Raj carry both of them. If he does break his back, let it never be said that he refused the pleas of an innocent toddler who simply wanted to get carried. Penny owed him for this.

Heaving a sigh, he secured his hold on Maddie and bent down to lift Andy with his free arm. Once he straightened back up, he blinked and glanced down at the two toddlers that were on each of his sides. He succeeded in carrying them! And he didn't break his spinal cord in the process! Maybe, he really was a superhero!

"Okay," the photographer said from behind the slightly outdated camera that he had been using the entire shoot. The photographer claimed that they were using that so it would match the traditional Japanese theme of the show, but not having a camera and painting portraits would be more appropriate. "Smile for the camera!"

Sheldon preferred to do the signature Steel Samurai pose, but due to the circumstances of the twins that were sitting on his arm, all he could do was make a small smile. "That was amazing!" The photographer grinned from the camera as the printer buzzed from beside him, producing the pictures that the assistant took. "Thanks for the pictures! Next, please!"

The production assistant led them out the area, and back to the front of the stage. "Here are your pictures," she lifted the handful of pictures as Sheldon placed both of the toddlers on the ground then took the pictures. The ones with only him and the mascots—except the Steel Samurai—were amazing! It would look amazing as a calendar, and glancing at the  _long_  line that formed at the entrance of the photo op, he doubted that they would get pictures as great as the ones he got. Then when they returned for Gregg's tour of the set, he would take more pictures that consisted only of him and the backgrounds while wearing the themed costumes he had!

The woman glanced down at her clipboard then at Sheldon who was staring at the pictures in his hands. "Oh which reminds me, in celebration of the Steel Samurai's hundredth episode, we're opening the Magatama club for kids and parents to join for free. It includes set visits, automatic inclusion to any events the show will be holding and much more. Would you like to join the kids in it? There's no age limit, even you can join."

Sheldon absentmindedly nodded, still awestruck at how amazing the pictures looked. The others would be so envious of him!

The woman sent the seemingly busy man a small smile before crouching down to level her gaze with the toddlers. "Can I have your names? It seems that your guardian is a bit busy."

Maddie grinned, nodding happily. "Maddie and Andy Coopah!"

Andy turned to Maddie with a frown, "Andy fuh-st!" Maddie harrumphed, facing the opposite direction in annoyance. "It  _Andy_  and Maddie Coopah. Andy fuh-st."

Coopah—  _Cooper._

Sheldon's eyes widened as his mind processed what the twins had just said. He suddenly felt his heart stop as he lowered the photos, glancing down at the twins and the lady who was scribbling the names down on the clipboard. His hands started to get clammy, and his throat had run dry. What did they mean by  _Cooper?_  Penny's last name wasn't Cooper, so it was impossible for the twins to have that last name if they took Penny's. Maybe Penny's nameless man that is also the twins' father had Cooper as their last name. That's right! Cooper was such a common name—he knew a lot of Coopers! But, why was his heart suddenly racing? That and why was he getting an ominous feeling?! It was nerve wrecking, and as he glanced down at the photo he held—he saw that it was the one of them and the Steel Samurai.

"Okay," the lady said as she finished scribbling the names down and glanced back up at the twins. "And who's the man behind you? He's kinda busy, so I hope you can fill me in. I need to write down a guardian's name who will give consent."

Maddie placed a hand at the side of her mouth to whisper—not realizing that her voice was still loud. "Dat Sedon Coopah, Andy and Maddie's daddy!"

_"Dat Sedon Coopah, Andy and Maddie's daddy!"_

Their… father?

No! It was absolutely impossible! There must have been some kind of mistake! Surely, Penny knew who her children's father was! His felt his head spinning, and he had the strong urge to vomit—this just couldn't be happening. The others might have just told the twins to say that to mess with him! That's right! Howard told the twins to say that he was their father so that he would get mad, and they would all laugh! How would he be their father when they called him Sedon, right? If he really was their father then they would have called him so! This must be just a really cruel joke that they organized to mess with him. Or maybe the twins just decided to consider him as their father as he was so amazing, and the most influential male adult in their life right now! They might have just remembered that his last name was Cooper, and decided that they were Coopers, too! Because, really, it was impossible! How in the world could he be the twins' father when he and Penny never—

"The Chancellor's Award night," he shakily whispered to himself as he felt his hand shaking.

_"Hey! That's mine!" The blonde hissed, wobbling a bit as she stood up, "and you're not at the hotel anymore, you dumbass! You're at home!"_

_Sheldon extended his arm upwards, putting the bottle out of the blonde's reach, glaring down at Penny. "I need more alcohol, Penny. I'm losing my confidence."_

But, that was a dream! He convinced himself that it was a dream, and that it wasn't real as he was heavily intoxicated that night! He only remembered fragments of that night, therefore, it was a dream. An alcohol induced dream that did not happen, like he kept telling himself. It was just a dream! It was just a dream… right?

_Sheldon rubbed his thumb against Penny's palm glancing at her hand for a second, then directed his gaze up to meet her eyes. "Thank you for being more than a wonderful friend, Penny. You don't understand how much you've helped me, and I wouldn't know what to do if you weren't here."_

He placed a hand on his forehead where a vein had started throbbing, tightly closing his eyes as his mind whirled. He wanted to scream, but he couldn't find his voice. All he could manage was a dry croak that made him want to bang his head on the pavement. His eyes were getting blurry, his head was spinning, his heart was racing in an alarming rate—it was all too much, and he couldn't handle it anymore! He couldn't hear what the lady and the twins were talking about—nor could he see their faces clearly—and all he could hear was his blood drumming as the memories of the Chancellor's Award night flashed in his mind so quickly that it was becoming painful to even try to stop thinking about it.

_"Sheldon, where did you get the scars?" Penny asked, lifting her gaze to find Sheldon's face reddening as he jerked his arm away. "I'm not sure," he answered, glancing at his arm, "I might have just hit something and didn't notice it. Now, weren't you going to talk to Leonard and fix things?" Penny opened her mouth to speak, then closed it again._

Then, he opened his eyes and glanced at the hand that was clutching his forehead.

It was still there—the scars that Penny left to make sure that he wouldn't forget about that night he always tried to forget. They were an inch long, dark, ugly and were out of place with his pale skin, but it wasn't as horrible as it looked in his memories that started flooding in his mind. The Chancellor's Award, Penny coaxing him to drink, the two of them returning to the apartment, the night that he refused to believe happened, the morning after when he saw the deep gouges that decorated his wrist downwards, Penny inquiring about it, Penny and Leonard breaking up, and the day that Penny left. It came crashing quicker than he thought and he felt like he was suffocating. It was too much; he couldn't take it, anymore. It was like he was stuck in a nightmare that didn't want to end. Nothing and  _everything_  was making sense.

Sheldon looked back down at the picture and felt everything crashing down on him like a piano violently falling down on someone in a cartoon.

This was the first time that he had ever seen him and the twins in someone else's perspective. He had always only seen them as Andy and Maddie or Penny's twins, and he had never noticed the striking resemblance that the twins had with him. They were a blonde version of him and Missy when they were toddlers! Like what Penny said in the magazine, Maddie  _did_  look like him. Her clear blue eyes were the exact same ones that he and Missy inherited from their mother, that she inherited from Meemaw. That was why her gaze seemed familiar, why it was as intense as it was, because it was  _his_  gaze. Andy had the same smile as his, but was also mixed with the natural happiness that Penny's smile had—which was what Maddie inherited. The picture alone gave him answers that he had been searching for since the first day that they arrived to live with them—they looked like a real family, had he not known who the man in the picture was. The matching themed shirts didn't help in convincing him that he really wasn't the twins' father.

Everything became clear to him—all of those questions that were unanswered were slowly being answered. The reason why they acted so comfortably to him, a stranger, when they first met was because they already knew that he was their father. They were far more intelligent than children of their age and grew an instant liking to Star Wars because of him. It was why seeing them cry made his stomach drop and him want to do everything they wanted, as long as they stopped crying. That was why he reacted so strongly when they said that he wasn't fun. Why he couldn't seem to get mad at him as he normally would when they made him miss  _William Shatner_ , and had accidentally destroyed his Lego Death star. It was why he felt a sense of loneliness when he saw the magazine they were featured in, and the happiness that he was missing out. Why he felt so relaxed when Maddie slept beside him, and he didn't even reprimand her for stepping into his comfort zone. Why Penny laughed at him when he told her that he would allow his future progeny to  _marry_  the twins, and when he said that Andrew and Madison  _Cooper_  sounded nice.

It was why he felt a strange sense of responsibility over everything they did. Why he knuckled under toddlers he had never even met, or knew existed until they appeared at his doorstep almost two months ago. Why he didn't even try as much as he usually would to find a way to get them back to their mother. Why he wasn't offended when Maddie refused to eat the pancakes and ordered him to make a new one. Why he quickly grew accustomed to their presence in their apartment compared to when he was still getting used to Leonard being his roommate. Why he wasn't bothered by carrying either of them and holding their hands even though he hated personal contact. Why it felt natural for him to take care of them even if he strongly disliked children and the concept of children. Why he felt a certain kind of warmth and comfort when he hugged both of them, before. Why Leonard refused to tell him anything about the identity of their father, and why even after a few weeks, having them around felt like the most natural thing in the world.

But this was still impossible—and he refused to believe that this was true until there was actual  _proof_  that they were his children.

Snapping out of his troubled thoughts, he shoved the pictures in his messenger bag and grabbed both of the twins; abruptly cutting their conversation with the production assistant. He ignored their questions as he marched towards the makeshift set where his friends were still taking pictures.

Leonard saw them from the corner of his eye and said something to the guys before turning to greet him. "Hey, how was the—"

"Be quiet," Sheldon snarled, placing the twins gently on the ground then strode down the tiny stage causing his friends to worry. He didn't care about them, right now. What he care about was getting answers,  _now_.

"Sheldon, where are you going?" Howard called from the stage as Leonard trotted after him. "Sheldon! Hey, what's wrong?"

Bailey lifted her gaze from her phone as Sheldon skimmed past her and Gregg. "Dr. Genius! Where are you going? The show isn't over!" Gregg stood from his seat, watching as Sheldon passed through the various rows of chairs. "Sheldon! The hundredth episode hasn't started, yet! Where are you going?"

Sheldon ignored them, focusing on leaving the place to find the answers he was looking for. He was stopped when he felt a hand on his arm, and turned to see Leonard panting. "Sheldon, what's wrong? Where are you going?!"

Jerking his arm back, he stepped back from his roommate and sent him an intense glare that made Leonard flinch. "Don't touch me!" He snarled, an arm in the air just in case Leonard tried to touch him again. He wasn't going to tell them the truth since none of them did that for him. They all acted as if the gravity of the situation was nothing to worry about. Like he'd just cheer and throw confetti around all of them when he discovered that he was possibly the twins' father, and they'd all play HALO as if they didn't do anything wrong. He asked them countless times about the truth, but all they ever answered him with was vague hints. He had never felt so angry at his friends as he was now, much more than the North Pole incident, and all of their mistakes combined. He was even angrier at Penny, but that would be settled when she came back. For now, he was going to find the answer to this conundrum.

He was going to find out the truth.

He  _needed_  to know the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To see how the hell everything happened, read; Alcohol Leads to Cicatrix.


	10. Hundred Sides

**#01 - Da Ag-eeh-met**

"—how is it possible that they do not have scheduled bowl movements?"

Leonard stared at his roommate in disbelief. "Are you even listening to yourself? They're barely two!"

Sheldon shook his head in disapproval and scribbled something down on the draft.

"Truly unacceptable, but what do you expect?" He drew a long line across  _bathroom schedule_  and sighed before turning to the two toddlers sitting on the floor. "You two practice your signatures while I finalize this. I'll be back in a moment." He swiveled his chair back to his desk and started typing.

Maddie took a long glance at the words Sheldon wrote, then grabbed a crayon and proceeded to copy the letters. "Maddie wike da ag-eeh-met!"

Andy hummed softly, then looked up at Leonard. "Wat bohl oomet?"

* * *

**#02 - Can Be Considered As Non-Fiction**

"Andy no seep," the toddler whispered, rubbing a hand against his eye.

Leonard softly sighed, glancing at Maddie who was fast asleep. "Why don't I tell you a bedtime story?" Andy nodded, snuggling closer to his blanket.

"Once upon a time, there was a very smart boy with an IQ of 187 who wanted to solve the mysteries of the world..."

* * *

**#03 - Invaded Like A Kingdom Without A Wall**

Sheldon eyed the mysterious creature that invaded the kingdom he found, grew and cultivated. For many years, only he ruled the kingdom and he never allowed any other mysterious creature to enter the walls of his haven.

Except today.

"Move."

"No."

"Move."

"No."

Sheldon huffed, turning to his should-be-demoted right hand man. "Leonard, make the brat move!"

Leonard glanced over his shoulder, "Andy, that's Sheldon's spot."

Andy folded his arms over his chest, "no."

"Do something about it, Leonard, or else!" Sheldon shook his head before marching into his room. London Bridge has fallen down, indeed.

* * *

**#04 - Do Not Do Unto Others**

"They have  _names_ , Sheldon!"

"I know that, and I refuse to call them that."

"What if I call you praying mantis, huh? Would you like it?"

"What if  _I_  call you garden gnome? Or stump. Take your pick."

"Not even hobbit?!"

"No."

"Fine." Leonard placed the dirty sock in the plastic bag. "But you're going to stop calling them those annoying nicknames, and as brats. Deal?"

"Deal."

* * *

**#05 - First Side of the Cube**

Maddie watched quietly as Sheldon worked on his whiteboard. It was something he always did, and she often wondered what the things he was writing on it meant.

Like the objects on the whiteboard, she often didn't understand what the adults conversed about, but sometimes, she knew that they were talking about her and her twin.

* * *

**#06 - Crunchy Goodness**

Leonard was strolling down the cereal aisle when Sheldon returned with his laundry supplies.

"Is that everything you need?" He asked, eying the possible brands of cereal that he would by for the twins.

Sheldon placed the supplies at one corner of the cart—making sure not to mix the food and the laundry products—then turned to what Leonard was staring at. "Yes. I saw Raj and the twins at the produce section and told them to meet us at the cashier. What are you staring at? We still have cereals at home."

"I'm getting some for the twins," Leonard replied, grabbing a box of  _Fruit Loops_ and _Cinnamon Toast Crunch_. "What do you think? Or should I get  _Cheerios_  or  _Frosted Flakes_  or  _Appla Ja_ —"

Sheldon grabbed both of the boxes, returning them to the shelves and took a box of  _Fruity Pebbles_. "All of the brands you mentioned are too hard for the twins to chew, and allowing it to soak in milk will ruin the flavor while  _Cheerios_  is just too bland for them." He placed the box in the cart and gave Leonard a knowing look. "I would have gone for  _Rice Crispies_ but  _Snap, Crackle and Pop_ annoy me to a great extent. Plus,  _Fruity Pebbles_  is not only delicious, easy to chew but also features the nostalgic  _Flintstones_ family members. They will praise me for this."

With a smirk, Sheldon grabbed the cart and left, leaving Leonard with a goofy (and foreboding) smile.

* * *

**#07 - White Flag Down**

"Dis ameh-sing!"

"Get dat one!"

"A swohd!"

"Dat gows!"

"LEONARD! WHY ARE THE TWINS IN MY ROOM? NO ONE'S ALLOWED IN MY ROOM!"

* * *

**#08 - The Force Is Not With You**

"Whoosh!" Andy swung the toy that was nearly as tall as he was and smacked it against the similar toy in Maddie's hands. "Andy! Ook, da man yoh fadah!"

"No!" Andy dramatically threw his sword to the side and fell on his knees. "Noo!"

"LEONARD! WHY ARE THE TWINS PLAYING WITH OUR LIMITED EDITION LIGHTSABERS?!"

* * *

**#09 - The Third Time's The Charm**

Maddie picked the green garment up and handed it to her twin brother, then picked the red one for herself. "Dis nice!"

Andy nodded, holding up the green shirt before wearing it over his pajamas. "Andy Sedon!"

"Maddie Sedon!" Maddie laughed, twisting her body as she walked around with the bright red shirt on. Andy followed after her until he accidentally stepped on the hem of the shirt that was way too big on his twin and tripped. "Dis fun!"

"LEONARD! WHY ARE THE TWINS WEARING MY GREEN LANTERN AND FLASH SHIRTS?!"

* * *

**#10 - Run That By Me Again**

Sheldon grumbled as they walked around the store. It was foolish to have agreed to Raj's idea of shopping in Los Angeles; everything was overpriced and unnecessary. Plus, there were no themed sets as Raj had promised. And this was only the first of three stores Raj suggested that they shop at.

"This is tiring," he announced as they walked along an aisle that seemed to have no end, "may we please just ask someone to lead us to where we can find them as you say, baby proofing items?" Leonard nodded, trying to call the attention of one of the personnel as Howard and Raj carried each of the twins and talked about what awesome  _Star Wars_  themed merchandise they could get for them.

"Yes, how may I help you?" The lady asked.

"Uh, we're looking for things to baby-proof our apartment for twins," Leonard said, a small smile on his face. Sheldon nodded, "that's right, we're looking for security gates and those outlet covers for our apartment, it is mandatory that we keep everything injury proof, right Leonard?" Leonard raised his eyebrows in response.

The lady grinned, crossing her arms, "That sounds wonderful, is this your first time in having children?"

Sheldon smiled, "Why, yes it is. I find it pleasant that you noticed! We have no experience in children at all."

She clapped her hands together, pointing her thumb over her shoulder, "That is really wonderful, just follow me, we'll find everything you'll need for those angels of yours!" Leonard called on Howard and Raj before following the woman to a farther aisle.

Raj furrowed his eyebrows, shifting Andy to his hip. "Guys, I think the lady thought that you were roommates in the not so heterosexual way."

Leonard shook his head, "That's impossible; I think she's just being hospitable, right, Sheldon?"

"I agree, Leonard. She seems really nice, shall there be any tip jars around we shall leave a hefty tip in her name."

They stopped at an aisle with racks left and right, filled with corner guards, outlet covers, latches and pretty much 90% of what they were looking for. They were in various colors and designs, but Sheldon was out to find ones in; train, monkey, superheroes or scientists themed ones, though Leonard assured him that they wouldn't find any.

"So what are the genders of your twins?" The girl happily asked, "It can help with choosing the right covers and locks."

"A male and a female," Sheldon answered, while both Howard and Raj decided to stand a few feet from them. They were both carrying children; they might be confused as a couple, too.

"I see, it must be great to be fathers of twins of opposite genders!" She giggled, handing them a simple grey corner guard.

"No—we're not like that, we're just roommates!" Leonard explained, his eyebrows raised and his eyes wide.

"Don't be ashamed! I think same gender couples are wonderful; I was raised by two gay dads! There's a couple states where gay marriage is legal, and love  _is_  love."

"You don't understand, it's not our twins!" Leonard continued, the pitch of his voice rising.

The lady raised her hands up, "it's okay, I understand. I'll leave you guys here, happy shopping!" Leonard watched in awe as the giddy woman skipped out of the aisle, singing a happy tune. Leonard turned around to find both Howard and Raj walking towards them while laughing, "What?"

"We told you so!" Howard teased.

Sheldon grumbled, "we're leaving!"

The twins didn't understand anything, but Raj and Howard only laughed harder.

* * *

**#11 - Across the Pond**

Penny sighed heavily as she plopped down on her bed. Shooting a movie was way more exhausting than she had thought. Everything had to be right, everything had to be perfect, and since it was going to be released in 3D, they had to make it great because the studio apparently had faith in it.

The only thing she was looking forward to was talking to her kids.

Taking a deep breath, she sat up and went to her desk and started up her laptop. Even at two in the morning she had something to look forward to. She loved hearing about what the guys had taught her kids and just seeing the whack-a-doodle. Though, she was usually annoyed with Sheldon, she still missed him. Regardless of how he acted as if she was the reincarnation of the devil or something. But, whatever, she'd have to deal with him if she still wanted to give the twins the one thing they wanted.

She opened up Skype, and saw that Sheldon had added her as a contact, again.

She ignored it; it wasn't the right time. He still hated her, and until he didn't, she wasn't going to accept him. Even if she really wanted to.

* * *

**#12 - Good Ol' Grandma**

"Howard Joel Wolowitz how could you?!"

"Ma, I didn't do anything wrong!"

"Didn't do nothing? How could you not bring the twins back here until now? Do you even know how much I missed them?"

"I didn't because I didn't want to scar them for life! Them staying with you before was already traumatic enough, I didn't want them to get even more scared!"

"That's nonsense! They love me, and you know it!" Mrs. Wolowitz grabbed the platter of freshly made brownies off the counter and brought them to the living room where the twins and Howard's friends were sitting. "Here ya' go ya' cute little babies. I can't believe that Howard took so long to get you to visit me again! I loved babysitting you, before!"

Howard skipped down the stairs and returned to the living room. "Like I said, I don't want them to get traumatized by you."

"What a horrible thing to tell your mother! Is this because I didn't drive you to the dentist?"

"No! Why would you even think that?!"

"Just because I love you doesn't mean that I have to do everything for you! I had to go out with Jenny from my water aerobics class. I'll take you to the dentist tomorrow."

"But I don't want to go to the dentist!"

Sheldon turned to Leonard with an eyebrow raised, "the twins have met Howard's mother, before?!"

* * *

**#13 - Monkey See, Monkey Do**

Maddie never understood why Sheldon always sat at the exact same spot on the couch. She had never seen anyone else sit on it, and when Andy sat there, Sheldon got mad and kept telling Uncle Leonard to make him move. Andy resisted at first, but eventually moved when Sheldon lifted him from the spot and placed him back on his own couch.

So, she thought, why shouldn't she do that as well?

"Move."

Andy glanced up at her twin who stood in front of him. "Dis Andy spot."

"No." Maddie stated firmly, crossing her arms. "Dat Maddie spot, now."

Andy stared up at his sister then sighed, standing and moving to the next chair so that Maddie could sit in his. "Dah. Dat Maddie spot, now."

Maddie grinned in content as she plopped down on Andy's couch. This would definitely be her new spot.

* * *

**#14 - Fun With Missing Letters That Make A Word Sound Bad**

"Wat Sedon doing?"

Sheldon glanced over his shoulder as he set up the camera. "I'm preparing to shoot another episode of my online show, Fun with Flags." He watched Andy nod in understanding then returned back to setting up the camera. This episode was going to be an interesting one, as it was going to feature all of the Asian flags and it's—

"Wat dat?"

He turned to see what the toddler was pointing to and saw that it was the Cambodian flag. I'm going to feature it in today's episode of Asian flags."

"Andy join, too?"

Sheldon stared at the blonde toddler who was staring up at him with pleading eyes. Well, it wouldn't hurt to include the twins and allow them to learn more about flags. They could even say the title of the show with him!

But… they often ignored the letter L which would make it fun with—

Never mind.

* * *

**#15 - Superheroes Lesson One: Ayn Man**

"Who dat?"

"Tony Stark."

"Who dat?"

"Pepper Pots."

"Who dat?"

"Iron Man."

Andy tilted his head to the side in thought, and Maddie merely shook her head. Her twin brother was always so noisy.

"Who Ayn Man?" Andy asked and Sheldon sighed, "He's Tony Stark."

"Who Toh-nee Stahk?"

* * *

**#16 - How Can He Not See It**

"Sheldon, Andy wants to show you something!"

The theoretical physicist hissed in annoyance before turning his chair to face his roommate and the blonde toddler. "What?"

Andy nodded, and went to work with his blocks. He grouped each by colors; the greens, the blues, the yellows, and the reds. Then he placed them neatly to the side and grinned proudly up at Sheldon.

"What do you think?" Leonard asked with a smug grin.

"I don't know. Good job at not making a mess?" With a shrug, Sheldon turned back to his desk and continued his work.

"Damn," Howard mumbled to Raj from the couch, "he is so blind."

They all turned to Andy who looked upset, while Maddie was arranging her own set of blocks. "I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree," Raj added then watched as Maddie laughed as she destroyed the blocks and started tossing them around. "And keeps on rolling farther."

The three men all nodded in agreement.

* * *

**#17 - Wonderful News**

"Hello? Who is this?"

"It's Dr. Leonard Hofstadter, President Siebert. Good morning!"

"Yes, yes. Now, why exactly are you calling three hours before I actually get up to go to work?"

"It's about Dr. Cooper."

"And what about Dr. Cooper? Don't tell me he got you to convince me to put up that confounded suggestion box again! I tell him time and time again, no one wants a suggestion box, and what everyone suggests is that he take a vacation! Sometimes, I wonder if he really is one of the university's most valuable assets."

"Uh, yeah, about that. Dr. Cooper told me to tell you that he's going to be using up seven days of his pending vacation days."

"Really?!"

"But if you disapprove, I'll tell him right awa—"

"Are you kidding? Why the heck would I disapprove? This is better news than when they said that the supposed greatest mind in physics was going to work for our university! Are you sure that he doesn't want to use the other seven pending days? I can even give him another seven if it means that I'll get to spend a day without him contacting me about that darn suggestion box. Or him wanting to put a replica of himself in front of the university!"

"No, he isn't going to use up his other vacation days. Just a week. But if he changes his mind, I'll tell you."

"Well make him change his mind! Don't disappoint me, Hofstadter!"

"Uh, yeah. Thanks President Siebert."

"No, Hofstadter, thank  _you!_ "

* * *

**#18 - Aftermath of Returning to Normal**

"So… you're still going to take care of the twins, right?"

"When have I ever backed down from a challenge, Leonard?"

* * *

**#19 - Lost In Translation**

"%#€£¥ $&?"

"%^*+=€£¥!"

"¡$& #^!"

"$ &€^%#!"

"What are you two even talking about?!" Sheldon shrieked as he swiveled his chair to face the twins who were conversing at their couches.

Maddie blinked, turning to Andy then back at the adult. "Bues Coos."

**#20 - In Which She Is Her Daughter Sign No. 1**

* * *

Sheldon placed a plate filled with a slice of cake in front of the twins, then handed them a fork designed for infants. "Don't make a mess."

Andy nodded, grabbing the fork and digging in to the cake made especially by Mrs. Wolowitz. Ever since the Wolowitz matriarch met the twins, she had been sending Howard to bring them food nonstop. If they didn't moderate the twin's Mrs. Wolowitz's specially made food intake, the twins might turn obese like Howard predicted. "It deh-ishas!"

Maddie cautiously stared at the dessert, frowning slightly as she did so.

Then she slammed her hand on the slice—causing the icing to splatter on the coffee table—and grabbed a handful of cake before eating it with a laugh.

As Sheldon wiped the icing that flew to his face, he had no doubt in mind that Maddie was Penny's daughter.

* * *

**#21 - Dirty Work**

Sheldon strapped on his rubber gloves and took a deep, deep,  _deep_  breath before turning around to see the job he had to accomplish.

"No want bath!" Maddie yelled, slamming her hand against the water and effectively wetting Sheldon. "Maddie no duh-ty!"

Andy watched Sheldon slowly wipe the water off his face before crouching down in front of the tub. With a laugh, Andy splashed more water at the fuming adult.

Wiping the water off his face (again) Sheldon realized that he should have  _never_  provoked Leonard.

* * *

**#22 - There's No Difference**

"Dat. No, dat! ... Dat. No, dat!"

Sheldon resisted the urge to groan as they stood in front of the display filled with open tubs of ice cream. He was holding Maddie on his hip while Andy ran back and forth from the start of the display to the end of it. "Maddie, just choose."

Maddie glanced up at him, "da choc-et and da ookies and ceam wook deh-ishas…"

Sheldon looked up at the employee and sighed, "she'll get both."

* * *

**#23 - In Loving Memory of…**

"And who should I write this to?"

Leonard turned to Raj and Howard who frantically nodded. "Dr. Sheldon Cooper."

"Oh," Howard brought his phone out and handed it to Leonard, "and could you please call our friend? He'll die from envy cause he missed you, but I think calling him will make it up to him. Unless he dies from hearing your wonderful voice!"

William Shatner chuckled, taking the phone to call their friend.

* * *

**#24 - Compensation Can Also Be Seen As A Gift of Some Sort**

"You will no longer be allowed to use your bottles," Sheldon firmly said, dumping the bottles into the black trash bag as the twins sniffled back a sob. "But, I got you something in return."

He took the plastic bag off his desk and pulled the contents out. "I got you sippy cups!" He handed each of the handled cups to the happy toddlers, then pulled out the last of the bag's contents. "And these Flash crochet dolls." The twins happily took the dolls and grinned up at him. "Those are exactly the same, so no need to fuss or fight."

"Tank yuh Sedon!" Maddie chirped in appreciation while Andy lifted the red colored doll and swung in around. "Da Fas fy!"

"It's the  _Flash_ , he does not fly," he corrected, walking back to his desk. "And you're welcome."

* * *

**#25 - Snooze You Lose**

"Your turn, Andy."

"Okay!" Andy frowned in concentration, searching for a loose block to remove. Maybe, he could take that o—

"Andy, wook! It Do-uh!"

Andy turned towards the front door and heard a thump followed by blocks crashing down. "Juhn-gah! Maddie wins!"

Sheldon sighed as the siblings argued, Maddie was too much of a sore loser to not cheat.

* * *

**#26 - The Right Way to Grovel**

_"I—was wrong to doubt you. I just got lost in the anger and I," the girl sighed heavily, dropping to her knees and her face near the ground. "Please forgive me, I still love you…"_

Raj sniffled, grabbing a tissue from the tissue box that Andy held for him and blew his nose. "She really loves him, you know. That's the right way to say sorry." Andy stared at the adult then placed the box back on the empty seat beside him, and continued watching the show.

* * *

**#27 - Simultaneously Unseen**

Penny adjusted the scarf around her neck as she exited her hotel.

She refused to believe that Sheldon actually got sad about her twins saying that he wasn't fun. It was like saying that his spot was open for everyone, or something. It might have been a mistake to leave her children with Sheldon. Maybe, he didn't need to know the truth—he didn't seem too happy about the twins living there, anyway.

"Penny! Hey, how are you liking Paris?"

Fixing a smile on her face, she shook away her thoughts of Sheldon and the twins. She'd deal with that whack-a-doodle later.

* * *

**#28 - Abstract-ish**

"Dis Mommy!" Maddie announced, lifting the clay that looked like a thin potato. She placed the  _thing_  on his lap then grabbed another clay… thing. "Dat Sedon!"

Sheldon lifted the clay thing that was supposed to be him yet looked like a crooked banana. If that was possible. "Uh, yes—thank you."

Maddie proudly grinned, stepping back so that Andy could step forward, holding up another…  _thing_. "Dis Sedon!"

* * *

**#29 - A Package Finally Delivered**

"Dear Meemaw,

This fragile item I sent you is the Lego Death Star. This is not the one that I made in six days as that one was destroyed by someone who I shall not name. This one was created by Raj and Howard who were both partially at fault in the destruction of my masterpiece. In lieu of that, I hope you like this one. I know it's not as great as mine was, but that's practically how it would look like. Without the greatness. Please be careful with it. I shall write to you again, soon.

Love, Moonpie."

Mary raised an eyebrow at the letter, then at her mother then at the circular thing that her son sent. "Is this one of those stringy things?"

Missy pursed her lips, poking the thing. "Naw, momma. It's from one of those science-y shows that Shelly loves. Pretty neat, actually."

Meemaw smiled at her grandson's friends' creation. "I think it's great. Why don't we put it over there where everyone cou—"

_CRASH!_

"Momma!" Missy groaned as her mother quickly stepped back from the scattered blocks. "What have ya' done? Shelly's gonna kill us!"

Mary sent her daughter a scathing look, "I was just liftin' it to put it on the shelf. I didn't expect it to fall."

Meemaw sighed. "Now, now, let's not fight, dearies. Missy, why don't ya' go on that technology thing you and Shelly love and get the manual for this? It looks like we're going to be busy fixin' this one."

* * *

**#30 - It's More Afraid of You Than You Are of It**

"Sedon!"

"What now?" The theoretical physicist swiveled his chair to see Andy and Maddie standing at the start of the hall, panic evident on their faces. "Did you finally realize that there really is no use of having those asinine blankets and dolls and are planning on throwing it out the window?"

"Dah a ahdah!" Andy exclaimed.

"A what?"

"A ahdah!"

Grumbling, Sheldon stood and followed the twins into the room. "A what?"

"Dat!" Maddie pointed towards the windows, where a spider sat silently on the curtains.

"LEONARD!"

* * *

**#31 - Play Hard, Logically and Truthfully**

Leonard grumbled as Sheldon waved the card in front of his face. "You're supposed to pay me ten times more than what you placed in the electronic banker."

"But I'm going broke! You have two hotels on Park Place, and I'm one person! Why do I have to pay the price of two rooms when I'm only staying at one?!"

"Forget that," Howard hissed, glaring at the grinning astrophysicist. "He's been cheating! Even the game version of him is, and none of you are seeing it!"

Raj rolled his eyes, placing the card on the used deck. "Hey, it's not my fault that I inherited so much money. My daddy and mummy just really love me."

Howard clucked his tongue, eying his best friend's moves, "I'm sure you just killed all of your relatives!"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow, rolling the dice and getting a nine. "That must be why he keeps on landing in jail." The three men all nodded in agreement at Raj's game version's illegal ways of getting money.

* * *

**#32 - The Single Letter Alphabet**

Andy hopped from the walkway to the the grass. "Dis gas!"

"There's an  _R_  in grass," Sheldon corrected, walking over to the grass while adjusting Maddie on his hip.

"Dat geen," Maddie pointed out, looking down at her twin.

"There's also an  _R_  in green. Can't you pronounce R right? Don't you use W for it?"

The twins shook their head and Sheldon sighed for the four hundredth thirty-sixth time since the twins arrived. "As long as that's the only letter you can't pronounce, I'll allow it."

"Da paygoud!"

"Pay at paygoud, peas?"

Sigh number four hundred thirty-seven. "There's an  _L_  in please, play and playground. We'll be working on that."

* * *

**#33 - Aliens… Or Something**

"Oh my god! I think an alien landed here, or something!" Neanderthal Number One yelled as they saw the burnt ring of grass that had some melted metal on top of it.

Neanderthal Number Two turned to his friend, "do you think that that creepy guy did this?!"

"It could be possible! Let's get out of here!"

* * *

**#34 - Maybe, Just Maybe**

Bernadette smiled as Howard lifted Maddie and swung her around in the air. The twins were really the only reason she was considering children of her own. Now that she and Howard were engaged, she had a feeling that she should start thinking of starting a family. Plus, Howard would be a great dad.

She could see it now; magic tricks with Howard and their son (or daughter) with her acting as the assistant. Observing fungi with a mini Howard or a mini version of her. Their kids playing with the twins who would be acting like older cousins to them. Howard's mother forcing them to stay at her house so she could spend time with her grandchildren and somehow managing to emotionally blackmail them into living with them—

Okay, she might not be that eager to have kids just yet. But she definitely would, someday.

* * *

**#35 - Like Helen**

Amy was living the dream—she was finally best friends with the most popular girl in school. The one who was friends and looked up to by everyone; that was drop dead gorgeous with perfect blonde hair like in the movies even though the actress was a natural brunette. Granted, they had just met, but she had a strong feeling that they were going to be the best of friends. Bernadette might be blonde and likable, but she was sitting in the geek's table when compared to the flaxen beauty.

"Is your hair naturally blonde?" Amy asked, curious to see if this was really straight of a high school based show.

Penny raised an eyebrow through the screen, lifting a handful of hair and examining it. "It was, but now it's more of a dirty blonde due to all the hair dye I did when I was younger. Platinum blonde dye can really ruin hair color, you know."

The brunette grinned happily—she really was living the dream! Even better than the high school based shows as her bestie was actually blonde! "Oh, bestie, I knew that your hair was naturally fair! Your beauty is unquestionable and can truly change the world! I'm so glad we met!"

The blonde smiled warmly at her, and Amy automatically knew that she'd do everything for her new friend.

* * *

**#36 - Color Me**

There was a snapping sound followed by a tiny fire starting.

"Sheldon, what the hell are you doing?" Bernadette shrieked as she saw what the quirky physicist was up to. He was standing in front of a stainless lid that had something  _orange_  burning on top of it.

"I'm not letting either of the twins touch that germ infested crayon," he casually explained, pointing a finger at the now melted crayon. "I was supposed to turn it into a candle, but found it too small to be one."

"You do know that because of what you did, even if you buy ten of the biggest crayon sets, you'd still be one orange crayon short?"

Sheldon sent the tiny blonde an annoyed look before marching over to the blanket and grabbing something. "You're right." He tossed the box of sixty-four (three since the orange one was now wax) crayons into the fire, causing Bernadette to jump in shock as the fire grew with the addition of the cardboard box. "You're absolutely right. We'll just start from scratch and buy a new set."

* * *

**#37 - Thirteen Years Later Side A**

Andy raised his eyebrows as his sister went through the pile of absolute horror and pulled out a pair of tennis shoes. "How did you even know that that was there?"

Maddie shrugged, placing the shoes near her door then stood beside her twin, surveying the mess. "It's actually way easier to keep track of where your things are when it's messy than when you organize them. I knew that my shoes were somewhere near my bed and thanks to that pile, it hasn't moved."

"Why would shoes even move, Maddie?" Andy incredulously asked, stepping back as one of the piles moved towards them. "If that's not Bowser Jr. I swear I will burn your Pooh doll and throw it out the window!"

He was so going to get a DNA test—Maddie couldn't possibly be related to him.

* * *

**#38 - Rethink Your Life Decisions**

"How about this?" Raj suggested, lifting the pink shirt that was in Maddie's size.

"Absolutely not!" Sheldon spat, grabbing the shirt and neatly placing it back in the pile. "Maddie is not wearing something so… foolish as Hello Kitty!"

* * *

**#39 - Step Back and Take A Look At the Big Picture**

Leonard placed two unopened boxes in front of Andy, hoping that he would finally like it.

Andy lifted both of them then scowled, "dis Big Bahd and Eh-mow. Andy want Os-cah da ga-ouch. Ookie Mahn-stah okay, too."

"How can he even tell the difference?" Raj inquired, searching the aisle for a  _Cookie Monster_  or  _Oscar the Grouch_  one. Now, he understood why Sheldon and Howard chose to buy pretzels over getting the sippy cup that Andy wanted. The  _Winnie the Pooh_  one for Maddie was easy, but all the  _Sesame Street_  ones consisted of  _Elmo_  and  _Big Bird_.

"Have you met his father? Of course he'd know the difference." Leonard mumbled, gabbing the boxes and returning it to the shelf. "Let's just hope that they don't inherit the cons, or else we'll have a trio of super villains waiting for that one accident to happen." The two shuddered, and returned to looking for an appropriate sippy cup.

* * *

**#40 - The Omniscient One**

Stuart leaned against the counter in thought as he remembered the group of geniuses—and two toddlers—that visited his store. He had finally finished doing inventory, and now had time to think about things.

After a few moments of thinking, he concluded that Andy's smile really was from Sheldon, and Maddie looked a lot like the genius physicist. Then he wondered if the others knew, if Sheldon knew and if the stray cat would come visit him tonight.

* * *

**#41 - Get It Right**

Barry Kripke was not just a great physicist, but he was also a great teacher.

"Kip-uh-keh!" The male toddler called once he spotted him entering the cafeteria, waving frantically from his chair. "Hey, spwout! Watcha doing?"

"We're obviously eating lunch," Cooper hissed, slicing the brisket that Mrs. Wolowitz made for the twins. "We'd appreciate it if you do not bother either of us."

"Hey, he cawwed me," Kripke raised his hands up in defense as he walked towards their table. "So, femawe spwout, do you know how to pwonounce my name cowwectwy, now?"

The female toddler slowly lifted her gaze—like she did when they were in Cooper's office—from her juice box and sent him another withering glare that was the exact replica of the glare that Cooper was sending him right now. "Kip-key."

"It's actuawwy—"

" _Kip-key_ ," the female toddler firmly repeated and Kripke nervously chuckled. Maybe, he wasn't as good a teacher as he thought.

* * *

**#42 - Second Side of the Cube**

Andy sat quietly as the adults discussed about Sheldon and something called progress. He could sense that it was a grown up thing, but like his twin, they often wondered what they were talking about. Maddie said that the adults often talked about them, but could never understand what they actually meant.

All he knew was that if Sheldon didn't make big 'progress' someone wasn't going to tell him something. They hoped that it wasn't about their Mommy—because they wanted Sheldon and their Mommy to be friends.

* * *

**#43 - It's A Required Taste**

"—I don't know, I'm not much of a music fan, but I'm not a fan of  _the Supremes._ "

"That's true. I like  _Diana Ross_ , but  _the Supremes?_  Not too much. I'm more of an  _Abba-Carpenters_ fan."

Raj clenched his teeth as Howard vice gripped his arm, preventing him from lunging at the two women. "Let go of me, Howard! I have to defend my soul sisters! They are one of the greatest girl groups in the history of girl groups! Practically all of their songs were hits! You can't just insult them like that!"

"Are you crazy?" Howard hissed, pulling Raj back, "if you go all crazy on them, we'll get banned and that would mean Sheldon getting angry! And besides, it's not like you can even talk to them!"

Raj digressed.

* * *

**#44 - Silent Yet Deadly**

In the six years that she had been working at the Sunshine Fun Center, (smiling) Brenda had never seen a group as odd as the ones that came with Halfway There's Penny's children.

There had been various children that came from prominent families that were taken care of by their center, but this was the first time that the actual children were mysterious. She had seen those toddlers various times on television before, especially as she was a huge fan of Halfway There. It was impossible to not know the twins if you were a fan.

Penny never told the paps the identity of the twins' father, only disclosing him as a very private man. So, when she saw the group and the twins enter their center, she suddenly discovered something no one else knew. What made everything odd was the tall man (Sheldon) denying that the twins were his children, she wasn't sure if she should be offended or surprised. The resemblance between him and the twins were striking, especially his and his daughter's. Anyone who'd see them side by side would know that they were parent and child.

But, she guessed that what Penny often said was true; the twins' father was a very private man.

* * *

**#45 - That Went Better Than They Thought**

Sheldon and Leonard spent hours and hours reading articles online about what they needed to do. It was something everyone had to so various times in their lives and they had to admit that it seemed scarier than they thought.

It was the twins' first day at the daycare.

They made sure that they thoroughly explained what a daycare was, then fed them the best breakfast they ever made (Sheldon made sure to put the blueberries  _in_  the pancakes) and made sure that they were relaxed the entire time.

"I know you're going to dislike the change," Sheldon started, crouching down and placing a hand on each of the twins' shoulders. As he was the guardian they preferred more, he was the one who had to ease them up on the idea of going somewhere without them. "But I thoroughly checked this center's background to ensure that you get only the best services. I'm sure you'll miss us, but you must remember you'll see us agai—"

"Okay kids! Time for class!"

"Bye Sedon," Maddie chirped, removing Sheldon's hand from her shoulder. "Bye Uncah wenad!" With a wave, she ran off towards one the mat and took a seat on the floor.

Andy glanced at his twin then back at the two adults, waving slightly. "Bye."

Sheldon frowned as he stood, watching as Andy settled beside Maddie, listening closely to what their teacher was saying.

Leonard whistled, earning a glare from his roommate. "That went way different than I thought it would."

* * *

**#46 - Tropes and Those That Go Along With It**

"Hmm…"

Leonard glanced up from his book, turning to Raj who looked like he was in deep thought. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing really," Raj started, looking at his phone then back at the bespectacled man. "It's just something I noticed while I was reading fanfiction that bothered me."

"Okay," Leonard awkwardly drawled; he didn't really care much for fanfiction, but since Raj was his friend, he'd listen to his conundrum. "What's the matter?"

"It's not really a problem, just a tiny realization. You see, the two characters I ship from this show none of you ever bothered to watch have a lot of fanfiction with them starting a family, and I've read practically all of them."

"Go on."

"Here's the thing, I noticed a pattern in the appearances of their future children." Leonard nodded, urging him to continue. "The guy is blonde with green eyes, and the girl is a brunette with blue eyes. In every single story I read—save a few—they always have a daughter, but there's nothing wrong with that because I love it when the emotionless guy warms up to his daughter."

The bespectacled man mentally groaned as the astrophysicist had a dreamy look on his face that somewhat creeped him off. "Just get on with the explanation before Sheldon comes out from the bathroom and awards us strikes for engaging in banal chit chat, much less catches us talking about something he would consider as completely asinine."

"Fine! So, like I said, I noticed a pattern in the way the authors decided how the genetics worked out. The two characters' son always has the girl's blue eyes—his hair actually differs with each story—while their daughter always gets the guy's green eyes and the girl's dark hair. I've read a few where they have more than one kid and one of their sons gets the blonde-green eyes combination, but never a daughter that had her mother's eyes or her father's hair. It's like a rule, or something."

"What exactly bothered you about that?" Leonard asked, turning back to his book.

"I just re-read the fanfiction  _I_  wrote and saw that I, too, described the son to have blue eyes and the daughter having green eyes and dark hair. I feel like such a cliche writer." Raj sighed wistfully then placed his phone on the coffee table. "How about we play some Rock Band?"

* * *

**#47 - The Single Animal In Old McDonald's Farm**

If there was one thing that the twins learned from spending time with the guys, it was that if they were ever forced to choose between something, they should choose the best among all of them.

"Okay, everyone, I want you to draw as many animals as you can remember from Old McDonald's farm."

Both Andy and Maddie knew which one that was.

The wonderful  _orange_  beaked duck.

* * *

**#48 - The Reflections Tell Me Something Else**

Sheldon extended his arm up as he opened the clear umbrella in his hand. "If you're thinking of jumping, stop right now."

Andy paused, his foot hanging in the air as he turned to look at the man. "No jump?"

The theoretical physicist nodded as he covered the toddlers with the umbrella, relieved that he got the twins to wear the raincoats he bought them. It was currently drizzling, and he was not letting them risk their health by jumping on the puddle and getting exposed to the rain. "No jumping."

Maddie blinked at him then stared down at the puddle that was reflecting the three of them. She turned back at the frowning adult then laughed, and took one giant jump onto the puddle.

* * *

**#49 - Superheroes Lesson Two: The Fash**

"Da Fas in da x men?"

"There's an  _L_  in  _the Flash_ ," Sheldon corrected, raising an eyebrow at Andy who sat next to him as he read his Flash comic book. "And no,  _the Flash_  is not from the  _X-Men_. He's  _DC_ , they're  _Marvel_."

"Da Fash in da an-jahs?"

"It's  _Avengers_ , and no, he is not. Again, he's  _DC_ , they're  _Marvel_."

"Da Fash in da fan-stik foh?"

"It's  _Fantastic Four_ , and once again, he is not. They are also from  _Marvel_ , while he is from  _DC_."

Andy paused to think.

"Ayn Man in da jus-tas eg?"

* * *

**#50 - If You Only Listened**

"Drink."

"No."

"Drink."

"No."

"I said drink."

"No!"

If only he could go back in time and stop this annoying occurrence from ever happening. Sheldon hissed as he held the spoon in front of Maddie's mouth. The toddler had gotten sink after that little stint under the rain. Now, she had a small fever and he was not letting it get worse.

He shifted at the edge of Leonard's bed as Maddie leaned back against the pillow and turned her face away from him. The stubborn little thing. "If you drink, I'll give you a free lesson about physics."

Maddie's head turned slightly, "stowy?"

"Yes, a story."

The toddler turned, opening her mouth wide as he fed her the medicine. He quickly handed her the sippy cup filled with water to wash it down before she spits out. "There! I told you it didn't taste  _that_  bad."

"Stowy?" She asked, shifting to her side and hugging her  _Winnie the Pooh_  doll.

Sheldon sighed, "it is there in ancient Greece that our story begins. It's a warm summer evening in circa 600 BC…"

* * *

**#51 - Did Your Parents Even Teach You Anything**

"—I mean, she's a good singer, but did  _Barbra Streisand_  really have to act? She sucked at  _A Star Is Born_ , and  _The Way We Were_  was just confusing."

"Don't forget all of the Fockers movies. But I think she was okay in  _Funny Girl_."

"Howard, let me go!" Raj hissed, struggling to break free from Howard's grip on his wrist. "I need to give them a piece of my Streisand worshiper mind! Evergreen is still everyone's favorite song, and  _The Way We Were_  moved me! You cannot just insult the Streisand and just get away with it! Like what  _Fran_ ,  _the Nanny_  said, if  _Barbra Streisand_  and my mother were on a sinking ship, and I only had one life vest left, I'd give it to my mother." Howard raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "Because Barbra can walk on water!"

"We both know that you won't be able to talk to them, so calm down," the engineer commanded as the two women left the center. "They're gone. Stop trying to get us banned from here." Raj pouted, plopping down on a bench as Howard snorted. "Besides, the Streisand is so much better than they'll ever be, as my mother would say about those who mock  _the_  Barbra."

* * *

**#52 - The Clock Ticks, and Another Penny Is Wasted**

Penny's schedule as follows;

 **4 A.M.**  - Wake up, have some coffee and mentally prepare yourself for another grueling session of martial arts and close combat class.

 **5 A.M.**  - Head to the gym (oh god) and endure martial arts and close combat classes (ugh)

 **6 A.M.**  - Pick yourself up and have some actual breakfast or else you'll die. And don't forget to call the twins to say goodnight!

 **7 A.M.**  - Say goodbye to that comfy chair and get your butt over to the set location to work! Don't forget to run some lines!

 **1 P.M.**  - Lunch! Finally! Feel free to stroll around if you aren't glued to your chair!

 **3:30 P.M.** \- Back to the set!  **M W Th**  - Drifting lessons for chase scenes (fun!)

 **8 P.M.**  - If you're still breathing, go get some dinner and sightsee or something. Shopping can work, too. Don't forget to call the twins if you haven't done it earlier!

 **10 P.M.**  - You should be back at the hotel by this time so that you can collapse on your comfortable queen bed! Six hours of sleep is just not enough.

Repeat for  **M T W Th F S**  if you survive the combat classes! Good luck!

* * *

**#53 - Dance Like No One's Watching**

Howard took a sip of his drink as the three of them stood at the very corner of the venue. "I actually had high expectations."

"I didn't," Raj remarked, frowning down at his barely alcoholic orange juice. "I only went because I have to schmooze up to the tenure committee for that tenure position, and cause he's marrying one of the members."

"What can you expect? Professor Frampton's fifty years old," Leonard snarled, taking a sip of his soda. "It's not like his bachelor party was going to be held at a bar or a club or something."

The three watched as various middle aged people danced traditionally on the 'dance floor' and they all winced when the professor's sisters asked them for a dance.

* * *

**#54 - Watch What You Say**

The idea of Sheldon's future kids marrying the twins made Penny laugh.

The fact that it actually came from him, made it even more hilarious than it already was. If only she could just tell him right there and then that he was the 'neanderthal'—Leonard said that that was what Sheldon called the mystery man—he kept on squawking about whenever the issue of who the twins' father was was brought up. She'd love to see the look on his stupid face when he found out that he was the exact person who he kept on insulting.

And when Sheldon did a  _Beetlejuice_  moment and asked about the twins' moment, she found herself pause and internally thank Amy for saving her.

* * *

**#55 - Third Side of the Cube**

Leonard drank the complimentary water as he watched Professor Frampton and his daughter dance together. This was the first time he had ever been to a bachelor's party that had women in attendance, but he guessed that there was a first time for everything.

"Dad, I just want you to know that I'm happy for you. You deserve all the love and happiness in the world."

For a moment, he envisioned a grown up Maddie dancing with an older Sheldon and found himself smiling. Years ago, he would have volunteered to babysit the twins for Penny's sake—when he was still hopelessly in love with her. That was no longer the case, now.

Now, he did everything he could to help Sheldon realize the truth by himself for the sake of the twins. Those two toddlers held the softest spot in his heart, and he hoped that years from now, they'd remember why he was their favorite uncle.

* * *

**#56 - Vive La France!**

On Sundays (Penny's day off) there was nothing she loved more than sleeping in and having an un rushed room service breakfast. Then once she felt like it, a sightseeing trip around Champs Élysées, or wherever her feet brought her to. She had been to Lourdes, Cannes and Monte Carlo with the rest of the cast, and she was planning on exploring France a little bit more before they flew to Japan to shoot for three unbelievable days. They were actually just going to shoot a few scenes there, but it was the travel time that made it longer.

She was loving absolutely everything about France; the food, the atmosphere, the scenery—the mimes! When she first visited the Paris casino in Las Vegas, she thought that she'd already seen Paris, when in reality, she had seen nothing yet. Kinda made her excited to visit Italy one day, since the Venetian was such a fun experience.

But, there was one thing she hated about France—she couldn't understand anyone.

* * *

**#57 - Slackers Need Not Apply**

"Dude, you live on—like—the fourth floor. That's too high!"

Sheldon glared down at the lazy teenager who was definitely not getting a tip from him. "You have one job, and that is to deliver my order at my doorstep."

"That's two jobs!" The boy protested, and Sheldon was close to vaporizing him.

"Expect the worst customer review you will ever receive when you return to the restaurant." He handed the money to the annoying teenager and snatched the boxes from his hand.

The teenager looked at the money, then frowned up at him. "What, no tip?"

"You'd have to do the second job to get a tip." With a huff, Sheldon turned and marched up back to his apartment.

* * *

**#58 - Thirteen Years Later Side B**

"I had a feeling this was here," Andy mumbled as he held his—now dirty—watch in the air. "Couldn't you at least have cleaned it?"

Maddie looked up from the pile of clothes she was sorting. "I didn't even know that I still had it." The blonde teenager shrugged at her twin, returning to the mess. "I recall giving it back to you yesterday."

"You never did that, and you have an eidetic memory."

"Right. Then I guess I returned it in my dream."

His sister was definitely a piece of work.

* * *

**#59 - Reluctance At It's Best**

Sheldon held the manila envelopes behind his back as Leonard plopped down on the couch. He was torn between asking Leonard the truth and finding it out by himself. "So… how was the bachelor party?"

"It was so horrible that I wished I went back here with you. I would have had more fun playing Rock Band than the party."

He'd find out the truth by himself.

"Well, I told you so. Goodnight."

* * *

**#61 - Foreboding Or Something like That**

"Damn! I got a paper cut!"

Andy looked up from the drawing he was working on and turned to Uncle Howard. They were currently at the park, and they had just finished having lunch.

Sheldon, Uncle Leonard, Uncle Raj and Uncle Howard were all sitting at the bench they normally sat at, reading the books that they always read. He could vaguely remember what they called it, and instead focused his attention on his funny Uncle who was frantically waving his hand in the air.

"Sheldon, do you have any band-aids?"

Sheldon didn't even look up at Uncle Howard, "the ones in my pocket are for my personal use, only. You of all people should know that."

So, Sheldon's band-aids were only for him. Mommy usually placed band-aids on their booboos, and he and Maddie had their own band-aids. The one with the dinosaurs were his, and the Dora ones were Maddie's—like Sheldon! How interesting!

"I'm not asking for yours," Uncle Howard replied, blowing on his booboo. "I'm asking if you have some in the twins' baby bag you always bring."

"Oh. You should have said so in the first place." Sheldon grabbed the gray bag that he always brought when they went to the park, and handed Uncle Howard a band-aid.

"Next time, bring your own band-aids, as there will never be a day that I shall give someone one of my personal band-aids. I repeat,  _no one_."

* * *

**#62 - Superheroes Lesson Three: Da An-jahs**

"Dat Hak?"

"It's  _Hulk_  and no, that's Loki."

"Dat Cap-tan Aka?"

"It's  _Captain America_  and no, that's Iron Man."

"Who dat? Hak? Oki? Cap-tan Aka? Ayn Man? It dat An-jahs?"

"That's Thor; it's  _Avengers_  and one character cannot be the entire group, Maddie."

"Noob!" Andy laughed from his spot, earning a look from Leonard, Howard and Raj.

Leonard snapped his head to Howard who was looking away, "really?!"

* * *

**#63 - A Day In the Life Disc One**

Penny woke up to the feeling of Andy gently shaking her arm. "Well, good morning to you, too, sweetie."

The toddler smiled up at her then pointed a finger at the door. "Maddie no wake up. Andy want eat." She sat up, stretching her arms before standing and lifting her son. At fifteen months, Andy (and Maddie) stood up to her thighs, and she had a strong feeling that there would come a day that she'd have to crane her head back just to look at her twins' eyes. Another thing she noticed about her son, was that he looked exactly like she did when she was his age—except she had longer hair. "It must be hard for you with the way me and Maddie love to sleep, huh?"

"Andy no want seep," her mini me stated as they reached the second bedroom, "Andy want pay!"

"And you're so energetic, too! You should know that you didn't get that from me." Penny chuckled, setting him down and approaching the crib that Maddie was sitting in. She was already up, but still looked half asleep. "Good morning!"

Maddie scrunched her face up in distaste before yawning and standing in front of the bars. "Moh-nin, mommy."

She lifted her daughter out of the crib and held Andy's hand as they made their way to the kitchen. "I know you don't like mornings but we have to get up and have breakfast!" Maddie grumbled. "Then we get to go to the set and play with Uncle Gregg and Aunt Bailey!" This time, Maddie grinned as she placed her in her highchair then proceeded to put Andy in his. She grabbed her apron from the rack and walked towards the counter.

"So, what do you kids want for breakfast?"

* * *

**#64 - Trust Me On This**

"Bailey! Bailey! Come on, we gotta talk about this!"

The dark haired actress paused—groaning—then turned to face her frantic best friend. She was planning on heading home to catch up on her Mexican soap operas and playing the new  _Pokémon_  game she just bought. It was her original plan for the day until the director called on them to come to the set to discuss the possible storyline their characters would be getting for the second season. She didn't want to go, but she had to. Work was work.

"What is it, Sparkly?"

"Penny's Emmys party?" Gregg raised both of his eyebrows as if what he said was the most obvious thing in the world. "Remember?"

"Oh, I remember," she mumbled, "what do we need to talk about exactly?"

"The party and the guests, of course! I'm thinking of having it at the restaurant, but I don't know who else to invite." The flamboyant man looked down at his phone. "I've invited the writers, the production team, the technical crew, all of the stylists, our co-actors and even the guards. Who else should I invite?"

Bailey pursed her lips, trying to remember anyone they missed out on. "What about Penny's friends from way back when? I've seen them way before, but I can't remember their names except the Sheldon guy that she's always talking about."

"You think they'd come?"

"Of course! They're Penny's friends and the twins are currently staying with them. Anyone who'd let the twins stay with them must be close friends with Penny."

Gregg blinked, "or must be the twins' infamous father."

Bailey's quirked in amusement before she laughed along with Gregg.

* * *

**#65 - A Day In the Life Disc Two**

"Morning Penny! Morning twins!"

"Morning everyone," Penny greeted as she and the twins walked into the studio. They were going to shoot Halfway There's two part season finale today where St. Peter and her character, Jane, was going to have a big confrontation about one of the subjects whose life changed for the better because of the mistake in the Heaven Control Room. The writers said that if she did this scene well, it would be a potential Emmy nod and win. So, she was going to give it her best shot.

"Morning blondie," Bailey said when she entered their dressing room. The dark haired actress was reading her script while Gregg was laying on the couch at the side of the room. "If you're wondering, Sparkly's taking a morning beauty nap. Something about maintaining his skin, or something."

"Uncah Gegg sick?" Andy inquired, staring down at the sleeping man.

"Sing sof' kitty?" Maddie asked, turning to Penny with an unsure look.

"No, you're Uncle Gregg is just sleeping." Penny sent her twins a small smile before settling into her chair and grabbing her script. The confrontation scene with St. Peter was a big one and was going to need all of the emotions she could muster up. "Isn't this a bit heavy drama?"

Bailey flipped to the page that Penny was talking about, "it's not even light drama, and I know drama. I've watched a lot of them."

"Scenes one to five rehearsal! Penny, Bailey and Gregg to the set!"

"And off to work," Penny grinned, placing the script on the desk and gesturing for the twins to follow her. "Off to daycare!"

* * *

**#66 - Fourth Side of the Cube**

Howard, Raj and Leonard ate quietly in the cafeteria. Sheldon had decided to skip lunch to finish solving one of the equations that popped into his head that could possibly be the answer to another scientific breakthrough. With his dark matter research, his multiple worlds theory nearing conclusion, advancement in his string theory research and the recent discovery of the new super heavy element, Sheldon was on a roll. He had been working hard in the past two years and they all agreed that he deserved all the success he was getting.

"He's kinda a rockstar, huh?" Raj started, adding ketchup on his burger.

"Something like that." Howard added, pushing the peas to the corner of his plate.

"Honestly, why do you guys have so little faith in Sheldon finding out the truth?" Leonard groaned, placing his fork down on his plate. "He's going to find it out on his own, I'm sure of it. And he's not going to throw them out the window like you said they would when he finds out. He's already warming up to the twins! Haven't you noticed how lax he is with them?"

Raj hummed, "it might be his inner daddy senses."

"Or his inner dark side trying to recruit and mold his offspring to continue the family business of being one accident away from turning into a super villain."

Raj and Leonard stared at the engineer who raised an eyebrow back at them.

"What?"

* * *

**#67 - Half A Year Ago in the Eyes of the Oblivious One**

"Did you hear that Penny's really famous now?"

Sheldon lifted his gaze from his food container and shifted it to Raj. "Didn't I tell all of you to  _never_  talk about her in my presence? Must I award you a strike for you to learn you lesson?"

Raj shook his head, "I just wanted to update us all about your former neighbor. Her show just premiered in the primetime slot for the fall lineup of shows, and the first two episodes are creating a buzz online. Critics everywhere are praising it and Penny's acting. She's already a breakout star, you know. You should watch it."

"Why would I watch it?" Sheldon snarled, poking a piece of chicken with his chopstick.

"It's actually good," Leonard quietly commented, picking up a dumpling and dipping it in soy sauce. "The three of us watched it, we're hooked."

Sheldon quickly snapped out of the trance he had fallen in and looked around the apartment; Leonard and the twins had already went to bed. He was busy working on his research on the infinite worlds that he had yet to finish and had lost himself along the way. Why he had somehow time traveled back to that day nearly a year ago, he didn't know.

With slight reluctance, he minimized the window of his word processor and opened his browser and searched for the words 'Halfway There.' There were various articles and links about it, and it even had it's own Wikipedia page.

The second season had just started and was watched by nearly twenty million people and had a rating of four point five stars out of five.

He'd give it a chance some other time.

* * *

**#68 - Curiosity Killed the Cat and Will Get the Toddler Banned From Watching TV**

"Maddie get dat!"

"No! Get dat!"

"Dis one has da fash!"

"Dis one has da An-jahs and Ayn Man and da Hak!"

"Dat one has da Fan-stik Foh!"

"LEONARD!" Sheldon screamed once he saw the door to his room opened, and the twins sitting in front of his bookshelf with various comic books on the floor. "WHY ARE THE TWINS TOUCHING MY COMIC BOOKS?! That's it! No tv for all three of you!"

* * *

**#69 - The Law of No Choice**

Leonard picked up a pair of gray pants and compared it to the picture Penny sent him. "Is Penny sure that these match?" He glanced at the blue and dark blue striped button down then at the pants. "It's kind of clashing."

Raj appeared from the dressing room, wearing a dark green sweater over a light gray dress shirt over dark pants, and grinning proudly. "Dude, those match. I look like a model," he lifted his arms then spun around. "Penny does have great taste doesn't she?"

Howard tightened his purple and pink tie in front of the mirror. "I have to agree with Raj. Who knew that pink looked so great on me?" He gestured to his powder pink dress shirt and grabbed the brown cardigan that sat on the rack. "Bernadette would so dig this on me."

The bespectacled man stared at the mirror again, then smiled slightly. "I guess it looks good on me. Yeah, Penny does have great taste."

"Wrong," Sheldon's voice boomed as he appeared from somewhere they didn't notice. He was wearing a pastel green dress shirt under a dark grey blazer over tan colored slacks. "I look like an even bigger clown than I did during the Chancellor's Award night. This is a terrible color combination!"

"Says the man who wears the brightest, blinding colors the world has ever seen," whispered Howard to Leonard.

"Dude, you look great, trust me." Raj assured, pointing his fingers like a gun at Sheldon.

"I can't trust you ever since I caught you whispering to your life sized cardboard cutout of  _Da_ _enerys_  that she should just quit the game of thrones and marry  _Jon Snow_." Raj groaned. "But, there is one thing that will make my outfit look wonderful." He lifted his hand and dangled a dark purple tie that had the  _Justice League_  members flying all over the fabric. "Allow me this or else I will be very hard to deal with during the entirety of this party you are planning on dragging me to."

The three men all looked at each other then sighed. It was Raj who spoke.

"Fine, but if Penny asks—you're going to tell her that you chose to get that and that we weren't involved in choosing that. Oh, and could you get each of us one, too?"

* * *

**#70 - A Day In the Life Disc Three**

"Okay, Andy you'll be St. Peter, Maddie you be your Mommy's character, okay?"

"Okay!"

"And action!"

Maddie took in a deep breath before marching up to her brother. "Yuh no do dat Peet! Yuh caht duh-sad to kuh hah buh-cos of wat she do! Yuh hafta guh-eeve hah a sa-coon chas! She need a sa-coon chas! Caht yuh un-stah dat buh-cos of wat yuh do she gots a new ot-lok! Yuh said it yoh-sef. Eri-one duh-sab a sa-coon chas, Peet. Am say dat dat guh need a sa-coon chas."

Andy turned a way and sighed. "Jehn, yuh mus' un-stah, dis da best foh eri-one. Yuh no do an-ting abaht dat."

"I didn't understand anything but you two were great!" Bailey cheered ending the video on her phone and running over to the twins. "And you have a great memory, too. How about we do the next line?"

"Bailey," Penny called, stopping as she passed the makeshift daycare where her dark haired friend and twins were. "What are you doing?"

The dark haired woman shoved her phone back into her pocket and stood straight, nervously chuckling down at her best friend. "Uh… nothing. I was just taking pictures of one and two, here! Why don't we all have some dinner? My treat!"

* * *

**#71 - In Which She Is Her Daughter Sign No. 2**

Maddie watched silently as Uncle Leonard and Sheldon shuffled around the apartment while Uncle Raj and Uncle Howard lounged on the couch while watching tv.

"Sheldon, wear the blazer." Uncle Leonard said, holding a jacket out to Sheldon.

"It's itchy and it makes me look like a clown!" Sheldon complained, grabbing the jacket and putting it on. "I'm only wearing it because I get to wear the tie. Don't forget that."

You don't look like a clown, Maddie thought to herself as Sheldon grabbed something from the closet. She liked what Sheldon was wearing; it was the same color as the dress she was wearing! She loved matching clothes with Mommy, and Mommy always had great taste in clothing. Andy normally couldn't match clothes with them (dresses and such) but usually wore the same color instead. Mommy said that it was being 'fashionable' so that they would look good when they go out since a lot of people saw them.

Looking at the four men, they were wearing nice looking clothes that Mommy normally chose for Andy. She was wearing a dress that matched Sheldon and she loved it. She didn't see why Sheldon was unhappy with his clothes cause he looked great! Mommy would most likely approve of what he was wearing if she was there with them.

Then, Sheldon placed something around his neck that she definitely  _did not_  like.

It was a purple thing that was long and had the characters of the  _Justice League_  on it. If Mommy was here, she would definitely say no to it! It was very ugly, and even Andy did not like it—cause he was fashionable like her and Mommy—with the way he was frowning at the thing!

"You're seriously wearing that?" Asked Uncle Howard who was putting on his brown jacket. He was dressed in pink, and although she didn't like the pink couch that Uncle Leonard originally bought her, she liked pink in her clothes. Pink looked great on her and Mommy—and Uncle Howard, too!

"Of course I am," Sheldon walked over to her and picked her up. "I bought it for that specific use."

"No," she stated with disapproval as she eyed the purple thing. She really didn't know what it was called, but she'd seen it many times before. A lot of the adults at the place where Mommy worked wore it, and Uncle Gregg normally wore a black one when they 'acted' and nicer ones when they went out.

"Excuse me?" Sheldon said, looking down at her with his eyebrows furrowed.

"Dat not fa-sha-nabah!" Maddie poked the purple thing then scrunched her face in disgust. "Ick!"

"Wow, even a baby knows that that tie is ugly." Uncle Raj said to Uncle Leonard who added, "but cool." Her two uncles each sniffed before going around the room to take their things.

Sheldon raised an eyebrow at her, and she knew what this meant. She would not win the fight. How horrible. Mommy wouldn't like the thing, but she tried her best to make Sheldon fashionable.

"Do you want me to take this off?" He tapped the thing with his free hand and she nodded. "Dat not nice!"

The adult carrying her snorted, "you really are just like your mother."

In the end, she still couldn't manage to get the thing off.

* * *

**#72 - A Wish (Kind Of) Granted**

"Maddie wine, peas?"

Howard chuckled, "sorry, kid, not today."

"Maddie wine, peas?"

Bailey placed the glass out of the toddler's reach. "I don't think there's anything wrong with wine, but I don't think your mom and I share that opinion."

"Maddie wine, peas?"

Leonard stared down at the toddler and handed her a grape. "That's kinda like wine."

"Maddie wine, peas?"

Raj paused in chewing the shrimp in his mouth, then swallowed before talking. "Your mother might not be happy if I did that. How about some shrimp?"

"Maddie wine, peas?"

Gregg raised an eyebrow, "I'll have to ask Penny about that but I promise to drink the night away with you when you turn eighteen. Oh god. I'd be forty-six by then!"

"Maddie wine, peas?"

Sheldon lifted the toddler and placed her top of the table before grabbing a glass that he had ordered earlier. "Here," he handed the startled toddler the glass. "I had a feeling you'd ask me last, and so I got that for you."

The blonde stared at the glass filled with purple liquid the glanced up at the adult. "Maddie wine?!"

"Yes. That's for you." The toddler grinned then started drinking the wine. It really was just sparkling grape juice, but she didn't need to know that.

* * *

**#73 - You're Not the Only One**

"Who are they?"

"I don't know them. Do you?"

"I've never seen them before."

Raj proudly smirked as he held his plate filled with shrimps. "Dude, I think those girls are talking about us. It must be our cool clothes and undeniable charm!"

Leonard furtively glanced at the women behind them and giddily ate another piece of shrimp. "Wow, I didn't think it would be possible but it is! I'm glad I went to this party. This might be the day that I get another girlfriend!"

Howard chuckled, dipping the shrimp into the sauce. "I may be taken but I'm willing to act as your wingman. I'd gladly help all of you be romantically happy like I am with my Bernie." The three all happily chuckled, happy at the attention the women were giving them.

"Actually," came a stern female voice, "they're not talking about how you look." Bailey stepped in between them, grabbing a plate of dinner rolls. "They're talking about how you three are hogging all of the shrimp."

* * *

**#74 - A Word From A Friend**

"So… this Sheldon guy you keep talking about. Did he hurt you, or something?"

Penny looked up at her dark haired co-star who had entered their dressing room. They had just finished shooting the cliffhanger scene of the season finale and were taking a break before redoing scenes that Mr. Fleming decided to change. "Oh god no. Sheldon was condescending most of the time—which is kinda like you—but he was a good friend. He may seem a bit robotic and everything, but he was a great guy once you get to know him."

"Did you hurt him?"

"I—I don't know."

Bailey watched as her normally cheerful and bubbly best friend bowed her head down and close her eyes with a small sigh. Eager to break the blonde's gloomy trance, she spoke again. "Well, if Maddie or Andy is anything like him then I guess he must not be half bad. Come on, why don't we get some apple strudel from that patisserie Gregg and I always go to? My treat!"

* * *

**#75 - Fifth Side of the Cube**

It was finally the day; the day of the  _Emmys_.

Penny was feeling excited and nervous at the same time. After twenty-six years of dreaming, and twenty-four episodes of Halfway There and hard work, the day of the coveted awards show had finally arrived. She was both nervous and excited, and even though she was oceans away from where it was going to be held, she felt like she was actually in California.

Whether she won or not, this nomination was one of the biggest achievements in her life. Getting nominated alone was a big achievement, and when the night ends she was still going to be proud. No longer was she the Penny that only saw a future of her managing the Cheesecake Factory—which was so surreal, because it seemed like it was just yesterday when she regularly donned the mustard yellow uniform that she hated. Now, she was their spokesperson and all that jazz.

It was safe to say that her life was perfect right now. A top rated show with universal acclaim, a movie about to premier, one she was currently working on and another one in line. Her bank account (and her wallet) was filled and she was even close to finally buying that house that Mr. Fleming (HT's director/executive producer/creator) was thinking of selling, so that the twins would have a big yard to play at instead of the small balcony in their condo. Even her parents were stable back in Nebraska, and they had even expanded the farm using the money she sent them. She had some money saved for the twins' trust fund. And she had this awesome new car that was so great that even Sheldon wouldn't complain if he ever saw it.

And there was Sheldon and the twins. She had seen (and heard) it with her own eyes that Sheldon wasn't as robotic to the twins as she originally thought. Although he had a rough start with them, she saw how much he cared for them even if he didn't have a single stupid clue that they were the progeny that would eventually rule the world that he kept on blabbing about. How Sheldon missed it—especially with Maddie bearing a striking resemblance to him—she didn't know, but she hoped that he would see it soon enough.

Cause if he doesn't, then there wasn't anything else she could do.

* * *

**#76 - Twelve Times With One Actress**

Bailey raised a fine eyebrow at the three men in front of them. She didn't really understand what they were asking her to do, but it did interest her. "Wait, what exactly do you want me to do?"

"Pose twelve times with us so we could make a calendar."

The dark haired actress hummed. Halfway There's official website/store actually sold a shirt bundle for christmas that included a cap and a special calendar that came with a code that would unlock the special wallpapers that could be downloaded—and she absolutely hated the final versions of her parts in the calendar. She looked like a ghost. Literally. But, there was a philosophy that Mr. Fleming taught them; never ignore fans. Plus, the Raj guy was actually a fan. He had been talking to her and Gregg about the possible storylines that the second season would have. The Howard guy kept on telling her that his fiancee, Bernadette—she didn't tell him but she already met the tiny blonde years ago—was a big fan. And the Leonard guy was one of those fans who watched the show but wasn't as obsessed with as Raj.

Plus, she couldn't say no to Penny's friends.

"Do we have a theme?" She asked, and the three men perked up and started to discuss all the poses they would do.

* * *

**#77 - The Toddler Magnet**

"Dude, there are like so many pretty girls here. I wish I could have the courage to talk to even one." Raj sighed, wistfully glancing at all the pretty guests. He was getting tired of being single.

Howard took a bite of shrimp—they didn't hog the entire platter this time—and watched his best friend watch a brunette exit the private area. "I know how you feel, buddy. I was you, once. Now I'm engaged to the greatest girl in the world and am willing to help out my main man because I'm so happy."

Raj's eyes lit up as he turned to the engineer. "Really?! You're going to help me?"

"Yes—but, it's not me who's going to help you." The engineer bent down and lifted Andy. "He is. Everyone loves babies, and are the biggest chick magnets in the world. Even Bernadette can't resist the charm of this little future heart breaker." He grinned at Andy who was ignoring him, and focused on eating his bowl of vanilla pudding. "Go on. Take Andy and just watch the women flock to you. Don't worry, I'll be watching from the sidelines."

Raj took Andy—who was still ignoring them and eating his pudding—and gave Howard an unsure look. "Are you sure this is going to work?"

"Yes! Just walk up and say hi. The conversation will quickly be about Andy, then you can talk all about him and Penny! It's a foolproof plan."

Raj nodded, taking a deep breath and heading off. He chose a crowded place to the right of Howard and approached a lady who was standing all by herself. "Hi, I don't think we've ever met."

The lady turned to him, her eyes widening. "Andy! It's you!"

Raj blinked while the toddler lifted his head and grinned at the lady. "Kawen! Make dess up, peas?"

Then the lady—Karen—took Andy and brought him to a group of people who all gushed about how big he had gotten since the last time Penny was at the studios.

Howard walked up to Raj, who was still dumbfounded about what had just happened. "You should really get pointers from Andy. He's going to be one big ladies man in the near future! And he isn't even trying!"

They both watched as Andy was fawned over by the men and women alike and wondered just how popular the toddler would be one day.

* * *

**#78 - Two People No One Ever Bothered To Ask**

Somewhere in Glendale…

"I feel as if I'm being left out of something incredible," Amy mused, looking up from the dinner she made. "Must not be anything important."

Somewhere in Pasadena…

Bernadette looked around her empty apartment and dropped her coat on the couch. They had found a solution to the chipmunk virus earlier than expected and was allowed to go home early.

"Howie?" She called, glancing around before sitting down on the couch. "I wonder where he went…"

* * *

**#79 - Thirteen Years Later Side C**

Andy shuddered in disgust once he dropped the dirty clothes into the laundry hamper. "Why don't you ever remember to put your dirty clothes in the hamper? We have it for a reason, Maddie."

Maddie peeked out of her closet, "I do! Like I said, it only got this messy cause I was looking for Pooh!"

"You disgust me," Andy teased, holding back a laugh. "If you're looking for  _Pooh_ , you're looking in the wrong room."

He finally laughed when one of Maddie's other stuffed dolls hit him square in the forehead.

* * *

**#80 - There Are Just Some Things That Can't Be Not Awkward**

Sheldon stared at the blonde on the screen for another moment before heading towards the hall.

Following his realization of missing their former neighbor, he suddenly found himself at a loss for words. To put it simply, they fell into awkward silence. Penny was checking her nails in silence and he was walking to Leonard's room. Uncomfortable silence it was.

"So…" he looked down at the screen where Penny was staring at him. "Did you have fun at the party? I saw some of the pictures on Raj's Facebook. You guys looked great."

He resisted the urge to scowl at Penny's statement. When Penny left, she removed them from all of her social networking accounts. She had only accepted him on Skype, the week before, and had only just followed him back on Twitter. Though, it was great to be followed back by someone who had six million followers (which was growing with each day) he was irked by the fact that she added Raj back on Facebook but not him. He couldn't even search for her since she blocked him, yet she accepted Raj back. How annoying.

"It was satisfactory, and the shrimp was excellent." He answered, placing his free hand on the doorknob, "and a lot of germ infested strangers surrounded me. Other than that, there's nothing left else to say." He pushed the door open and found Andy and Maddie trying to stay awake while Leonard searched through his dresser for his pajamas. "Children, your mother is here to say goodnight to you."

He glanced at the screen and saw Penny seemingly wanting to say something, but opted not to. With a tight smile, he placed the laptop on the edge of the bed and exited the room.

How uncomfortable.

* * *

**#81 - Something Forgotten**

Gregg sighed happily as he walked through the restaurant. The party had ended about half an hour ago, and everyone had left except him, Bailey and the staff who were busy cleaning up. He was at the lobby when he saw Bailey conversing with one of the staff.

"Snarky, what are you talking about?" He asked as he strolled towards his dark haired friend.

"Mr. Wilkes, good evening," the staff greeted, "and congratulations on the success of Miss Penny and the party."

Gregg smiled, sidling next to Bailey who was scowling. "Thank you! So, what are you and Ms. Mckenzie talking about?"

The staff raised a gloved hand, holding up the purple tie that Sheldon was wearing. "I was asking Ms. Mckenzie what I would do with this."

Bailey huffed, still glaring at the tie. "I was telling her to burn it, but she said that the owner might be looking for it. Who would have thought that I didn't get it  _in_  the trashcan?"

"Actually, I know who owns that," Gregg said, causing Bailey to send him a look of disbelief. "Would it be okay if I asked you to get it clean? I'll stop by to get it when you're done. I still have to return it to someone."

The dark haired actress shook her head and walked out of the lobby, leaving Gregg and the staff to discuss about how the tie should be cleaned.

* * *

**#82 - In Which She Is Her Daughter Sign No. 3**

Sheldon stepped into the twins' (Leonard's) room and found himself close to screaming.

The room was messy—there were clothes scattered everywhere, toys out of place, the blankets had fallen off the bed and all he could do was silently weep for humanity. He glanced at Maddie who was sitting on the floor and was shoveling through a pile of clothes.

"What are you doing?!"

The toddler looked over her shoulder and blinked, "ceaning."

It was like Penny never even left and was turned into a toddler.

* * *

**#83 - The Color Orange**

If there was one thing Andy and Maddie loved about daycare, was the animal time. They loved meeting the new animals such as the Elephant and the Hippo, and loved practicing for their Old McDonald play.

Today, Mrs. Green (the twins found it cool how her name was a color) and Brenda were going to tell them who would play who in Old McDonald's farm. It was actually an expanded version of the farm that included animals that really wasn't in the farm. Like the lion.

"Who Andy wanna be?" Maddie asked as she took a bite of the sandwich for their snack time. They loved snack time, too. And play time. And song time. And nap time—except Andy. He hated naps.

"Andy wanna be da duck!"

There was an awkward silence that fell between the siblings that was felt by everyone in the room.

"Maddie wanna be da duck!"

"No! Andy da duck!"

"Maddie da duck!"

Clearing her throat, Mrs. Green held up the sheet of paper. "Okay… I'm going to announce who's going to play who." The twins tore away from the glares they were sending each other to listen to Mrs. Green's announcement.

"Chase will be the lion. Sarah will be the pig. Jacob will be the cow…"

Andy and Maddie glared at each other until they heard their names. It was the moment of truth; who would be the coveted duck.

"And Andy will be the sheep and Maddie will be the duck."

"No!"

"Yay! Maddie da duck! Maddie get tah use da oh-wandge cayon!"

Mrs. Green raised an eyebrow, "Maddie, ducks are yellow."

Maddie turned to their nice teacher and lifted the toy duck that sat near her and her brother's desks. "Da beak oh-wandge. Duck oh-wandge. Maddie da duck."

Andy grumbled beside her and Mrs. Green pretended to understand what the toddler meant.

* * *

**#84 - A Day In the Life Disc Four**

Gregg always loved first days. First day of school, first day at a new house, first day at work and first day of shooting!

They had just finished filming the first episode of the second season of Halfway There, and were taking a break to shoot some scenes of the second episode. With Penny leaving for France in August and coming back in October, she was going to be gone for the initial start of shooting. So, Mr. Fleming decided that they start filming the first five episodes in July—since the show comes back in September—and resume shooting when Penny comes back.

"Uncah Gwegg!"

He stopped, turned and found Penny's adorable twins waving at him from their dressing room. "Hey, you guys!" He walked over to them with a grin. "Aren't you supposed to be in your daycare place?"

"Mommy say dat Andy Maddie stay hewe!" Andy answered as Gregg sat both of them on the makeup table.

"Uncah Gwegg pay?" Maddie asked, tilting her head to the side. "Pay Steh Sam-wai!"

"I have a better idea!" Gregg searched through the makeup box and grinned when he found what he was looking for. "Why don't we play pretend that we're characters from Halfway There?"

"Okay!"

"But first," he reached for a makeup pencil and leaned back to examine the twins' face. "We have to give you two some eyebrows." The two toddlers barely had any eyebrows, and coupled with their blonde hair, made their thin eyebrows look almost nonexistent.

Uncapping the plastic cap, he lifted the eyebrow pencil and started drawing over Andy's thin brows. The darkness of the lines were a bit out of place with his blonde hair—considering the fact that the pencil was Bailey's, and she bought the darkest shade to match her jet black hair—but the Penny mini me look strangely aggressive, yet better at the same time!

Happy with his work on Andy, he moved on to do Maddie's.

"Gregg?" He paused when he heard Penny's confused voice fill the room. "What the heck are you doing?"

* * *

**#85 - The Pasadena Tea Party**

"Ebi-one, say hi!"

"Hello!"

"I don't understand why I must partake in such an—OW! Leonard, you didn't have to hit me!"

"And you don't have to be so condescending! Just be nice and play along!"

"Fine. But this is definitely going on your roommate report for the month."

Maddie did a sound close to clearing her throat, then lifted the plastic teacup and tapped her spoon against it. "Okay! Maddie gonna intuh-duce ebi-one." She gestured to the stuffed doll beside her, "Pooh, dat Uncah Wenad, Uncah Waj, Uncah Howad, Sedon and Andy."

The aforementioned people—excluding the yellow bear—waved.

"Andy," Andy pointed to himself then to the cowboy doll beside him, "dat Woody. Woody, dat Sedon, Uncah Howad, Uncah Wenad, Uncah Waj and Maddie."

Raj grabbed the Malibu Raj that he made using the 3D printer that he, Howard and Leonard bought. "Is this some kind of getting to know you tea party? Cause I'm so in!"

Howard slid a glance at his best friend who started talking about his doll and himself, then turned to Leonard. "This feels more like an AA meeting than a tea party to me—OW! That hurt Raj!"

* * *

**#86 - Which Reminds Me…**

Amy curtly nodded as Leonard handed her a food container before taking a seat at his armchair. "As I was saying, Ricky has taken an interest into smoking while listening to rap music.  _Eminem_ ,  _Jay-Z_ ,  _Kanye West_ —he's more calmer when they're making my home a target for thugs and gangsters. But, it's a small price to pay if it means that he'd stop throwing his feces at me."

"I'm sorry," Leonard started which Amy responded to by opening her container, and he lowered his voice. "Sorry I asked."

Sheldon hummed nonchalantly. The twins were at Raj's for the day, and the peace and quiet relaxed and bothered him at the same time. "I see. I'm glad that your research has been returned ever since you threw it back at Ricky. As for my weekend, we didn't do much other than attend this cockamamy party for Penny."

Amy flared, her hostile gaze shifting from Sheldon then to Leonard that caused them to wince. "Yes, about that party in which you all forgot to invite me to…"

* * *

**#87 - The Ships and the Ships That Sail With It**

"What are you watching?" Leonard asked Raj as he entered the living room. He had just brought Maddie into his room for a nap, and was going to get Andy to do the same. Sheldon was at the comic book store, and he didn't have to pick him up since Howard was there with him. "Is that cartoons?"

Raj looked up from the top of Andy's head. "Yup.  _Jimmy Neutron_. It's a classic, and I used to love it when I was younger."

Leonard sent Raj a look and took a seat beside him. "That show wasn't on when we were younger, Raj."

"When I say younger, I mean a few years younger." The astrophysicist shook his head and raised the volume. "Must you really be so critical?"

"So, what's this cartoon about? I saw my nephew watching it before, but didn't bother to watch it with him."

"It's about the daily life of Jimmy Neutron, who is a boy genius, and his friends Carl and Sheen." Raj pointed to an odd looking character who was talking to a blonde. "That's Jimmy—the guy with weird brown hair and big blue eyes—and the blonde he's talking to is Cindy. That's the girl he always argues with, but secretly they like each other. They even get married in the future. It's pretty cute, to be honest. They're those type of couples—or ships, as we fanpeople call it—who bicker all the time but eventually fall in love with each other, if they haven't already. Or in fanfiction, if they aren't canon."

Raj smiled at him, and Leonard stared back, unable to follow him. "You know? Like Gregg's character Charlie and either of Penny and Bailey's characters? Like  _Ross_ and _Rachel? Chuck_ and _Blair? DiNozo_ and _Ziva? Puck_ and _Quinn? Booth_ and _Bones?_ " Leonard still stared. "Okay, if you're not familiar with tv shows, I'll go with the anime we watch.  _Ichigo_  and  _Rukia? Inuyasha_  and  _Kagome? Miroku_  and  _Sango? Ed_  and  _Winry? Katara_  and—though it's been murdered by the new  _Avatar_  series, LoK— _Zuko? Ash_  and  _Misty? Naruto_  and  _Sakura_ , if you don't like  _Sakura_  and  _Sasuke_  or  _Naruto_  and  _Hinata_? Every single shoujo manga out there?"

Leonard opened his mouth and closed it again.

"Like  _Hermione_  and  _Ron_?"

"Oh!" Leonard replied, finally understanding what Raj meant by 'ship.' It meant two characters who were romantically involved, or paired up even if they were platonic. "I didn't know people did that—ship characters who are just platonic."

"Hey! Just because they're platonic—and the writers will keep them that way forever—doesn't mean that they can't happen!" Raj huffed, clearly affronted by what Leonard said. "We canon-slash-non-canon-slash-no relationship fans are very passionate about our ships! That's why we have fanfiction!"

Leonard scooted away from the fuming astrophysicist. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't know that people do that. I don't really care about those 'ships,' I just go with whoever hooks up on the show."

"Well, you should! Shipping is fun and very life changing. And controlling." Raj stated, turning back to the television. "Plus, there are a lot of good fanfiction out there.  _Fifty Shades of Gray_  started out as one for  _Twilight_. I write fanfiction of my own, remember? And I'm sure that Jimmy and Cindy have some as well! The genius and the pretty blonde he always argues with—I love those types!"

"Genius and pretty blonde that he always argues with, huh?" Leonard mused, rubbing his hand on his chin as he watched the two characters continue to argue. "You know… those two kind of remind me of someone. Brown hair, blue eyes. Blonde hair and green eyes. It feels like I've seen them before." He hummed as the Jimmy character left with his two best friends and entered a lab of some sort before the credits rolled. "I don't know where, but it seems too familiar. The bickering, the appearances. Gah! Sheldon would probably know who I'm talking about."

Raj shrugged, "I strongly doubt it. You know Sheldon hates shows like this. He might even throw us out the window if he catches us watching it. Penny watches it, though. Andy seems to recognize the characters. You should just think about who those people are, and I'm sure you'll remember."

"No, I'm good. I'll remember who they are some other day," Leonard replied, grabbing the remote and flipping the channel.

* * *

**#88 - Thoughts That Can Make Someone Oblivious**

Penny shoved her hands in her pockets as she stared at the Eiffel Tower. She wasn't really planning on going there today—she was originally planning on shopping—but somehow, she just brought herself to the giant structure.

Her recent win at the  _Emmys_  had been keeping her buzzing, but it was her recent talk with Sheldon and Gregg and Bailey that got her all sentimental. What was crazy was that it wasn't about her win at the  _Emmys_ , it was about Sheldon. She was still torn about Sheldon and the twins—his time to find out the truth was almost up. She was coming back to California in less than two weeks (after their day trip to Japan) and based on what her two friends said, Sheldon didn't have a single clue about the truth. At first, she had a strong feeling that he'd realize it from the moment she left, but as the weeks went by, he still didn't have a clue. Or a feeling.

It was why she was torn; should she tell him, herself, or should she just let him be and move on with his life? They could do that! She could move on with her life with the twins, and Sheldon could have those progeny that would rule the world that he always kept on babbling about. He could live without the twins! But… Gregg said that Sheldon and the twins were close, and if you didn't know them, you'd see two kids and their cranky father. But Sheldon used to keep on telling her that the twins were 'nuisances' and that they were some random guys' children. Even Bailey said that he was okay! And that was Bailey, the girl who hated people who were; rude, annoying, egotistical, stupid, foolish, too nice, too fake, too bubbly, too dramatic, lazy, and pretty much everyone in between. If she said that Sheldon was okay, then it must mean that he  _was_.

She sighed, stopping at the middle of the pavement as people murmured her name. In just a week and a half, this was all going to end, and she didn't know what she was going to do when that happens. She continued walking—ignoring the people who were talking in French—and barely noticed the rain falling on her head.

* * *

**#89 - Superheroes Lesson Four: the Non Superheroes**

"Mistah Spok in An-jahs?"

"No.  _Spock_  is from  _Star Trek._ "

"Kuhk in x men?"

"It's  _Kirk_  and no, he's also from  _Star Trek_."

"Bihbo in da jus-tas eg?"

"It's  _Justice League_ , and no,  _Bilbo_  is a hobbit from the  _Lord of the Rings_."

"Doktah Who in da hobbit, too?"

"No,  _Dr. Who,_ is _Dr. Who_."

"C twee pee oh in da stah feet?"

"It's C3P0, and no, he's not from the Star Fleet. He's from  _Star Wars_. You must remember these kind of things, Andy."

…

"Stah Wahs in da stah feet?"

* * *

**#90 - A Day In the Life Disc Five**

"I don't understand why we have to watch him do his stupid kiddie show," Bailey grumbled as she walked beside Penny and the twins towards the Steel Samurai: Warrior of Neo Olde Tokyo's studio set. She peered from the top of her DSi and saw Gregg hopping across the set. "He looks stupid, and this is taking away my  _Pokémon_   _Heart Gold_ time. I'm trying to level up my Quilava, and this is seriously getting in the way."

Penny chuckled at her best friend who was immediately back to focusing on her game. "Sheldon and Leonard plays those games, too.  _And_ , we're here to get the twins. Gregg took them for the day and now we're getting them back."

"CUT! That's a wrap! I'll see you guys again, tomorrow!"

People started shuffling around, greeting the two actresses as they passed them until Gregg came, removing the head of his costume. "Hey, girls! The twins are with some of my cast members if you're looking for them. I'm sure that you're not here for me cause it's Bailey's game time." Two people ran over to Gregg and took his costume apart, leaving Gregg in a plain white shirt and shorts. "God, that costume is literally an oven. Great exercise, though."

"Mommy!"

"Mommy! Maddie got da Pink Pin-cess sina-toh!"

Penny smiled as the twins waved at her, each holding a poster of the characters of the show. "Hey twins! It looks like you had a fun time." She watched the twins run to the set, placing the posters on a prop box. "I'd thank you for entertaining the twins, but you holding this role up is really getting in the way of shooting."

Gregg grinned, placing a hand over Bailey's DSi and blocking her view. "Well, that's nothing compared to someone who's going to France and ruining two months of our shooting time." He winked at Penny who stuck out her tongue, while Bailey hissed. "God, Gregg! Thanks to you, I lost the battle! I'll never level up at this rate."

"Don't mind her," Gregg chuckled, "it's game time. Which reminds me, Penny! My show is going to have this big meet and greet episode on the sixth of October in celebration of our hundredth episode and I was wondering if you want the twins to be included. I could easily get them in, but it's just in case there's a really long line."

"Oh damn, shooting wraps up on the ninth, and we're flying back on the tenth." Penny groaned, furrowing her eyebrows. "But I'm leaving the twins with my friends, so they might be the ones who'll take them if you remind me."

Bailey raised an eyebrow, holding down the A button. "When you say friends, you mean that Sheldon guy, right?"

Penny nodded, "yeah. Actually, I'm leaving them with his roommate."

"The Sheldon guy's gay?" Gregg gasped, fixing his hair that had fallen due to the heat of his costume.

"No, he just has a roommate. Anyway, I'm not even sure if he already knows that the twins are gonna be staying with them."

"You have that much hope, huh?" Bailey stoically asked, still concentrated on her game. "Why don't you just tell him the truth? Who knows, you might even be one big happy family—that is, if you had romantic feelings for each other which you've been denying. You could be like  _Bruce Willis_  and  _Demi Moore_  and be happy co-parents, or something."

"Snarky is right, blondie," Gregg commented, "I know you want him to find out by himself, but how will he be able to do that if he's never even met the twins before? Kinda a hard challenge, if you ask me."

Penny sighed wistfully, "I know. It's just that—I don't think that he'll even be glad. I'm sure that he'll doubt it and won't believe me if I just tell him. That's why I'm leaving them with him. So, he can find out by himself."

"You're digging your grave, blondie," Bailey remarked, "and are asking for a world of turmoil. My Bailey senses are telling me that this won't be good, but it's also telling me that it won't be bad."

"Am I doing the right thing? I'm so confused."

Gregg placed a hand on his co-star's shoulder and smiled. "If you won't go through with it, you character Jane would most likely be sent to help you push through with it. And besides, Bailey said that it won't be bad, and you know that her senses are practically never wrong."

"Damn right it's not," Bailey smirked, saving the game and turning her DSi off. "Why don't we have some cupcakes? Gregg's treat!"

* * *

**#91 - The Rant That Has No Subject**

"You know what confuses me about Disney movies?"

The three men all hesitated to look up at the astrophysicist who was having another one of his rants.

Leonard heaved a sigh, placing his sandwich down. "Fine, what?"

"Well, they always take these not so happy stories and turn them to something so unrealistically happy. Don't get me wrong—I absolutely love the Disney movies, I just don't understand why they gotta make it so happy." Raj explained, biting off a piece of carrot.

Sheldon snorted, "those Disney films you're talking about are all intentionally aimed for audiences of ages twelve and below. It is not appalling to know that they changed the original endings to make it more suitable for children such as Andy and Maddie. Penny—or any other sensible parent—would not be happy if Disney made  _Aladdin_  akin to a movie such as  _A Clockwork Orange_. Or  _Battle Royale_."

"What I mean is, why do they gotta make everyone happy?" Raj asked, brows nearly touching his forehead. "If the world was that happy, no one would be starving. Like in the  _Little Mermaid_ —I refuse to believe that her father just allowed her to run away with a guy she barely knew! Again, don't get me wrong, I think it was true love, but really? And didn't she die via sea foam in the real story? Then there's  _the Hunchback of Notre Dame_  where Quasimodo was supposed to commit suicide by jumping of the top of the cathedral after Esmeralda was killed. He didn't die in the movie—no one died! Except the priest! Loved  _God Save the Outcasts_ , though."

"What is this discussion even about?" Sheldon asked, raising an eyebrow at the astrophysicist.

"I'm just saying that they should make movies that are a lot more realistic. I mean, really, how could they have not realized that  _Mulan_  was a girl? I loved all of the songs, but come on! Then in  _Pocahontas_ ,  _John Smith_  and her never had any type of relationship. Well, they did get it right when she married  _John Rolfe_ , which is the most realistic part of the sequel, but really—they should stop stretching the truth. Then in  _Cinderella_ , how could the slipper not have fit anyone else? I'm sure she was a size eight, and I strongly doubt that no one else had the same shoe size! Then in  _Up_ , where did he even get all of those balloons? And isn't it scientifically impossible for a thousand something balloons to lift a house attached to the ground and be able to carry it all the way to South America? Then and don't get me started on  _Cars_ —" Raj looked around and found that the three men had all left.

"Guys?"

* * *

**#92 - Trending Topics**

"I must admit," Sheldon started, placing the piece of the bitten cookie down on his plate. "These Chewbacca chewy cookies are splendid. And so are the Java the Hut Walnut ones. Raj, good job."

Raj grinned from the end of the booth, and held up at thumbs up.

"That's the reason why Bailey and I keep coming back," Gregg took a sip of water. "Their desserts are to die for! However, Bailey is right about their triple chocolate cake. It's one sweet tooth that assures you a spot on the diabetes express."

"That sweet?" Leonard asked, shoveling in another forkful of apple pie.

Bailey hummed, scrutinizing the last piece of her blueberry cheesecake on her plate. "Yes, sweeter than all of these combined." She took her fork and stabbed the bite sized piece and brought into her mouth. Then she took her cup and took a sip of tea then lifted her gaze. "So, Sparkly and I never did get a chance to talk to all of you. What was Penny like before we met her? I'm sure she was all sorts of bubbly with rainbows surrounding her and the occasional dark nimbus clouds that are enough electricity to kill someone."

Howard blinked, "yeah, she's pretty much how you described. She's usually the sunshine in our group that contrasts Sheldon's dark skies."

"I am not a dark sky, nor do I have clouds of my own." Sheldon snarked, sending Howard a glare. "If you shall associate me to some kind of weather aspect comparison, I would be the starry sky that is just so full of mystery and excellence that no one can compare to. I am not a dark cloud ready to produce rain and thunder."

"Yup, he really is the dark cloud that Penny always talks about." Gregg remarked with a wide grin. "Penny talks about all of you all the time on our breaks. Mainly because Bailey never tells anyone anything, and I'm just one big open book ever since I starred in Lies and A Truth." He saw Raj's eyes lit up, and instantly knew that the mute guy was a fan. "The single truth of the show is that they really do love the person they're paired up with." Raj dramatically placed a hand over his heart and grinned. "Kinda romantic, huh? Anyway! Leonard, I heard from Penny that the two of you dated briefly. Why did you break up?"

Leonard opened his mouth to speak but Sheldon beat him to it. "Because he said that he loved her, and Penny was unable to do the same. Then that cretin Wil Wheaton manipulated Penny into forfeiting our bowling tournament which also lead to Penny moving out and never showing up again. Kind of the story of Leonard's life."

"Hey! He was asking me," Leonard hissed, then looked down. "But Sheldon's right. That's how it all went down. But we've been friends ever since."

"Ah, the premature phrase that makes everyone run in fear—or joy—like Slenderman standing behind you." Bailey solemnly remarked. "Understandable."

"Uh, is Penny seeing anyone, recently?" Leonard asked out of curiosity. Sheldon frowned at him, Howard and Raj looked at each other and the two actors raised an eyebrow. "Not that I'm interested in getting back together with her! Don't get me wrong! Just curious."

Gregg smiled, "to be honest, even the two of us aren't sure. We know that some famous guys are interested in dating her—like one of her co-stars in Hindsight, but she never really said anything. Do you know anything, Bailey?"

Bailey shrugged, "honestly? I know she went on a date, once. But that's practically it. Although, I know that there's this one guy that she's really been thinking about it." The dark haired actress smirked, and Gregg caught the innuendo. "I'm not really sure if it's of a romantic nature, but he's all she's thinking about. She even said that she was torn about some kind of decision she's gonna be making. So, no. She's not seeing anyone."

The three men all sighed in relief while Sheldon simply snorted.

"Uh, Raj is saying something," Howard said after the moment of silence. "Gregg he's asking if your hair is considered as dark blonde?"

Gregg glanced upwards at the strands of hair that strayed from his hair that was brushed up. "Honestly? My driver's license says it's fair, but I consider it to be light brown. I mean have you seen my eyebrows? They're of a dark brown color, and I've never dyed my hair. Ever. It's always been that beautiful, shiny shade of dark gold that I spend so much time trying to maintain…"

Bailey threw a piercing glare at Raj then turned to Sheldon. "Never get him started on his hair. He'll never stop talking about how the shade confuses him."

* * *

**#93 - A Song Can Affect Thoughts, Didn't You Know**

This was what she got for ignoring those fans at the Eiffel Tower.

And for not bringing an umbrella.

And for choosing to walk all the way back to the hotel as it rained.

Penny quickly grabbed a tissue and blew her nose—she felt horrible. She had a fever, a cold and she was delaying production. They had a week left of shooting to finish before they had to fly to Japan to shoot a scene, then back to California to finish the rest of the film. They had already given her a day off for her Emmy win, but she felt bad about having to stall all the scenes she was in. Which was practically all of it.

But! She was actually feeling better because Sheldon allowed the twins to sing soft kitty to her. Honestly, she had hoped that Sheldon would be the one who would sing it so that they could sing it in a round, but her twins' voices were enough. Those few seconds of the song actually reminded her of all the times that she heard soft kitty. The first time when Sheldon got sick, then when he got locked out of his apartment, and when she dislocated her arm. It was such a special song to her, and she had once wondered if the rest of the guys knew it. Which was answered when Leonard asked what soft kitty was. It was so nostalgic, and she wondered how it would be when she returned.

Would Sheldon realize the truth? Would he still go out of his way to meet with the twins if he did? Would anything change?

Without finding any answers, she drifted off to sleep and dreamt of her life back before she screwed everything up.

* * *

**#94 - Persistence Is Key Especially If Unexpected**

Bailey internally cheered as her s'mores flavored pop tarts finished toasting and placed it on her plate.

Today was going to be a great and relaxing day; she was going to catch up with all the shows she watched. From  _telanovelas_  to asian dramas to anime to some other shows that she had lost track of. Then she'd end the day by importing her Pokemon from the gameboy games and playing her newly bought  _Ghost Trick_. Best of all, she didn't have to deal with her flamboyant best friend who always found a way to—

_Ding dong._

She quirked an eyebrow and placed the plate down on the table then glanced at the wall clock. It was nine sharp, and too early for anyone to be visiting. Which was odd, since she didn't hear her call box ringing, nor received a text from anyone that they were coming over. The security was pretty tight at her condo, so it wouldn't be anyone who was trying to kill her. She had a strong feeling that if it was a criminal, she had a bigger chance of killing them.

Grabbing the kitchen knife that she used to slice ham, she stalked towards her front door and peeked through the eye hole.

It was  _Gregg_. Oh, damn it.

She slowly backed away and crossed her fingers that the flamboyant man would go aw—

"Bailey! I saw your shadow, let me in! It's time to get dressed and go with me to the studios!"

With a huff, she swung the door open and found Gregg happily smiling at her. It was sickening how vibrant he was. "What the hell are you doing here? And how did you even get in?"

"The doorman just let me in. Well, I've been coming in and out of this building for a year, now. I doubt that they'd stop me. They seem to be fans of the show." Gregg eyed the plate of pop tarts and fake coughed. "Calories, Bailey. Anyway! You're going to tag along with me and Penny's friends to the studio! Aren't you excited?" Bailey stared at him. "You are? Good! Then get your butt into your room and get dressed. This is going to be a big day!"

"Someone just kill me," Bailey groaned, placing the knife back in the holder.

"I will if you don't start moving. We're gonna be late!"

Today was going to be a long day for all of them.

* * *

**#95 - Because One Isn't Enough**

" _Charlie's Angels!_ "

"Ooh! Ooh! How about Kung fu poses?"

"Now, let's do  _Power Rangers!_ "

"Dude, now let's do classic  _Star Trek_  fight scenes!"

"But this is Steel Samurai. Not  _Star Trek_."

"Right. How bout  _Phoenix Wrights'_  objection pose?"

"Okay, but in Steel Samurai-esque ones!"

"Now, sexy glamor shots!"

Leonard grinned as he pushed his glasses up. "How many pictures do we have?"

Raj checked the camera, "two hundred."

Howard adjusted his Jamming Ninja guitar, "that's too little! Let's take some more!"

* * *

**#96 - The Moment Passing In Between People Who Have Nothing In Common**

Sheldon silently thanked the assistant who handed him the styrofoam cup of tea and took a seat on the chair that was two away from the actors.

Bailey took a sip of coffee and watched the three men who were running around the set, doing various odd poses.

Gregg rubbed his nose, trying to hold back a sneeze and succeeded. "So…" he started, getting the attention of the two who were possibly separated at birth. "Fine weather today, huh?"

"I guess so."

"It's satisfactory."

"You know," Gregg said, grabbing his companions' attention. "It takes a while before all of the pieces of the puzzle comes together. It may be hazy, now, but it will be clear, soon."

Bailey snorted, "the weather's not hazy, Gregg."

"That is true," Sheldon agreed.

The flamboyant man sighed, deciding on focusing on his coffee.

* * *

**#97 - The Humble Opinion of the Snarky One**

"—I'll give him his tie back," Gregg happily said, dangling the tie in the air. "I got it cleaned and everything, and even forged an apology letter from you."

Bailey shook her head as she watched the lanky man take a picture with another costumed person. "Yeah, yeah. Hey, look at Genius, over there. He looks like a dad who's even more excited to meet a costumed cartoon character than his children."

"Isn't he not?" Gregg quipped, glancing at the meet and greet area. "Penny's coming back in a week or so. Do you think he's gonna find out by then? Cause the thought of Sheldon not finding out and Penny not telling him saddens me. It's actually really heartbreaking."

"He will," the actress confidently stated, crossing her arms. "My Bailey senses are  _never_  wrong, Sparkly. Trust me on this."

Gregg smiled and watched with Bailey as Sheldon and the twins moved over to the Steel Samurai.

* * *

**#98 - A Feeling That Won't Be Dealt With Until Later On**

Mary Cooper was standing at their porch when she felt an odd feeling pass by with the cool air of the night. It was telling her that something was going to happen. Not an ominous kind of feeling, but more of a big, life changing one that she couldn't understand. It was odd, but it suddenly reminded her of her Shelly. It had been a while since she had last talked to her son, and she wondered how he was doing.

"Ma!" Missy called, running out to the porch, "I was watchin' the news, and I saw that Shelly's friend blonde friend, Penny, won the award!"

"That's great! I always knew that she was goin' places." Mary commented as she and her daughter re-entered their house. She'd have to talk to Shelly, later. "Have you finished preparin' dinner?"

* * *

**#99 - Thirteen Years Later Side D**

"—I just don't understand why you're such a slob!"

"I am not a slob! You're just too neat!"

"What's wrong with being neat? Look at my Woody doll! He still looks like he did when mom bought him. Look at your actual  _Pooh_. From everyone's favorite bear, to the toilet's favorite thing!"

"I told you, Pooh took a tan! We live in California, tans are normal. Except on you, cause you're paler than a ghost!"

"Look who's talking? We have the same skin color! If I'm a ghost, you're equally as ghost looking."

Penny poked her head in her daughter's room and raised an eyebrow. This was yet another one of those days where her twins fought over the silliest things. Nothing a little talk couldn't handle. "What are you fighting about, now?"

"It's Andy's fault!"

"It's Maddie's fault!"

In her thirty-nine years of life, Penny had never seen a room as messy as her daughter's room. Well, that was kind of a lie since her apartment used to be so much dirtier but that didn't count. Maddie's messy nature wasn't much of a surprise since she was sure that she got it from her. It was kind of funny that while Maddie was extraordinarily messy, Andy was one big neat freak. He organized everything, cleaned everything, and would get mad at them if they were messy. Andy even occasionally sneaked in her room just to reorganize her closet. Had he been someone else, she might have punched him. She took a step inside the room and looked around. "What happened here?"

Andy quickly strode towards her, ready to tattle on her twin sister. Andy was usually very calm when it came to her twin sister, but she knew that when he had had enough—he had had enough. "It all started when Maddie accused me of taking her stupid doll! Then she asked me to help clean her room up, and now she even has the nerve to argue that I'm cleaning her room, wrong!"

Penny mentally sighed as she tilted her head to look into her son's similar green eyes. At fifteen, Andy now stood at five feet eleven, and Raj already told her that her son would get even taller in the years to come. The math told them that Andy would be about six foot three at the most, and six feet one at the least. She was glad that her son was so tall, but he was also very gangly and was horrible at sports. Then there was the athletic Maddie, who also had also outgrown all of them. Her daughter wasn't as tall as Andy (thank god, or else heels would be nonexistent) but stood at five feet nine—which Howard and Leonard normally cried about whenever they came over. They said that it was possible that she'd get taller, but they all hoped that she wouldn't. She remembered a time when it was the twins who had to crane their heads back just to look at her, now, the tables have turned. And talking to either of them would one day cause her to get a stiff neck. "I'm guessing that Maddie misplaced it while she was looking for it?"

Her son frantically nodded his head, then pointed to the third blonde in the room. "Yup. Now, she's telling me that I'm trying to control her life! Mom, put some sense in her, please. Or else I will break her favorite tennis racket!"

"You can't even break a pencil," Maddie quipped from the corner of her room, looking for something under another pile of clothes. "Much less my racket."

"Maddie, you should thank your brother for helping you clean your room." Penny calmly said, walking towards where her daughter stood. "We both know that Andy's the only one who's willing to clean between the three of us. And we can't always rely on Sheila to clean your room. This house is far too big for her to clean this mess up."

Her daughter was silent for another moment before turning and gazing down at her. It almost shocked Penny how Maddie's eyes were the exact shade of blue that their father had; a light blue that matched the sky of a good day for kite flying. "What do you have there, sweetie?"

Maddie blinked, looking down at the paper thing in her hands then extended her hand out to her mother. "Mom, when was this?" Andy moved behind Penny to see what his twin was talking about, and grinned once he saw it. "Ha! I was so much cuter than you were, Maddie!"

"Oh shut up! We looked exactly the same—but I was cuter!"

"Yeah, right. Look at my face! I was so much cuter than you."

Penny gingerly took the picture from her son's hand, and found herself getting emotional. It was a picture of Sheldon carrying the twins, smiling happily beside the character that Gregg used to play.

Taking a deep breath, she turned her back and walked towards the door. "Maddie, you should get ready for your game. Your Uncle Raj said that he'd pick you up at one. I just have to stop by the studio to get something, then I'll follow."

"Mom," Andy called, sending his twin a worried look, "are you okay?"

Penny looked over her shoulder and sent her children a weak smile. "I am, don't worry."

* * *

**#100 - Sixth Side of the Cube**

Sheldon felt like it had been days since he had last breathed. The realization that had hit him earlier had metaphorically sucked out all of the oxygen from his system.

Everything was just wrong—all of it, and he felt so  _stupid_  to not have seen it earlier. How could he not have seen all of the similarities that he and the twins had? He had even called himself a neanderthal! Though, he was still unsure if he really was the twins' father, but if he really was, then everything would start making sense to him. All of the questions he'd had since the first day they arrived at their apartment would be answered.

Why didn't anyone tell him the truth?! He wasn't sure if Koothrappali or Wolowitz knew, but he was sure that Leonard knew. And he was most definitely sure that  _Penny_  knew. The nerve that that women had to not tell him about them! If they really proved to be his, he would be inexplicably infuriated with her. They were  _his_  progeny, too! He had already missed a year and a half of the twins' life and was stripped off of all of the obligations and rights he had! Like what their names would be, and how they would grow up! If Penny had allowed him to be in the children's lives from the start, they would already by talking in coherent sentences by, now! They wouldn't be clinging to such foolish things such as those dolls that Penny got for them.

Penny never even bothered to think of how he would feel regarding all this!

He was a father; he was responsible for the lives of two children and he didn't even know that he was! Did Leonard and the others just expect him to laugh about it and dance with them while Penny tossed flowers around them? He would not! He was  _beyond_  outraged! He was even angrier than when Penny left—no, that was the understatement of the year! He had  _never_  been this angry in his entire life. This was even worse than the North Pole incident. He could always get another chance at winning the Nobel—he was actually already close to achieving that—but he would never be able to partake in the first moments of  _his_  progeny's lives! He didn't know when they first managed to walk, or when they first talked and what the word was. Although, he was sure that they did it at an early age as he was a prodigy, and they already proved to be much more advanced than children their age. But! They could have been even more advanced in life if they were allowed to be in his life at an earlier date.

Come to think of it, the others had been in touch with Penny since a year ago… which meant that they had known of the twins' existence since then! And they never even told him! And he would not believe any explanations of them saying that they didn't realize it—Maddie and Andy looked like a blonde version of him and Missy! Even though Andy looked more like Penny, the resemblance could not be denied. He was too blind to see it, and now all he wanted to do was scream.

He no longer had a clue of what he was supposed to do.

Sheldon hissed as the bus took a stop, causing him to slide slightly on his seat. If they really were his children (which was very likely) how would he act in front of them? He was never the type of person who would coddle his progeny like Penny did. He always envisioned his children to grow up knowing what to do, and automatically worshiping the ground he walked on. The twins didn't even call him his rightful title of father, or parent, or daddy since they wouldn't be able to pronounce the first two. How was he supposed to act around them? Was he supposed to feel the need to carry them everywhere and kiss them like what other parents did? Because he absolutely could not see him doing any of those. He could carry Maddie, sit them on his lap, but he just could not see him happily putting them on his shoulders as they ran through a field of flowers.

He never saw himself playing baseball or football with his progeny. Or taking them to whatever lessons Penny had enrolled them in. Or arranging playdates with the neighbor's children like his mother had done for him and Missy. Whenever he thought of going through with the in-vitro way of having children, the only vision he saw was him and his progeny talking about their latest research. They would build robots together, and ruin Kripke's children's career—and they would all be celebrated scientists, each dedicating their life to outdo the other. That was what he saw whenever he thought of being a father. He could not see either of the twins doing that with him. Ever. They were so… normal, and he guessed that it might have been from Penny's genes. He wasn't saying that the twins were dumb—they were definitely intelligent, now that he looked at it—but they didn't seem as scientific as he and the others were when they were younger.

He had been solving math problems since he could remember. Leonard was trained to make science journals and dissect his siblings' papers since he was young. Raj had supposedly discovered the moon when he was five, which inspired him to study astrophysics. And Howard was said to be tinkering with various household appliances when he was very young. The twins—regardless of how intelligent they were—were not showing any interest in science, and instead seemed more interested in following the footsteps of Dora and voyaging around the world without her parent's consent. The only science related thing they liked was Star Wars, and that was mainly because they found the lightsabers and the Death Star to be cool. If they didn't like science, what would they talk about in the future? What would they bond over? What would his part be in their lives other than being fifty percent of their DNA, since Penny did not give him the luxury of choosing their names?

Huffing, he stood from his seat and exited the bus. He had finally arrived at his chosen destination, and here, he was going to finally find out the truth.

The rest of his questions could wait later.


	11. Aftermath Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sheldon finds out the truth and gets answers from Leonard.

_Probability; 99.99999._

Sheldon read over the paper one last time before putting it back in the folder that Amy gave him to put it in. He was unsure of how he was supposed to feel—he hadn't since he stormed out of the backlot—and took in a deep breath.

So, it was true. He really was the twins' father.

It had been nearly seven hours since he hopped on the bus to get to the laboratory that Amy worked at. He didn't even care about how unsanitary the seat he sat on was, or how the bus driver kept on stopping without reason. All he cared about was getting to the lab as quickly as possible. He would have hailed a cab, but for some reason, none passed during the entire time that he stood outside the studios. Then he saw Leonard and Gregg running after him, and it made him muster up all his strength to run to the nearest bus stop without allowing them to catch up to him. He was somewhat fortunate as when he reached the bus stop, the bus was already there. He couldn't recall how long it took to get to the lab, but what he  _did_  know was that it was not fast enough.

When he reached the building, he immediately found Amy at the lobby, heading out to get her lunch. He stopped her, of course, and demanded that she get her biochemist friend to run one last test (or however many he or she would be willing to do) but this time, using his DNA. Amy was stoic the entire time he prodded her to do one last test, and agreed after the fifth try, telling him to follow her and that he consider it as a favor. It took approximately five minutes before Amy found her colleague—who was in the middle of having lunch—and asked for the test to be done as quickly as possible.

Then, the three biochemists appeared from the lab and handed him three different tests that had the same results.

While he anticipated the outcome of the tests, he had lost himself in thinking of the various scenarios of how he would react. On the negative side, he saw himself having a huge wave of relief washing over him, and calling it a day of overreacting. Then, on the positive side; he saw various reactions he would have. The first scenario was of him fainting, and falling on the floor as the scientists gathered around him—probably because they recognized him. The second scenario was of him getting angry, and wanting to throw one of the chairs at the wall. He would somehow get superhuman strength that was enough to lift the metallic chairs that were stuck the ground, and throw it at the biochemists as Amy tried to calm him down. The last scenario was of him, happy that he was their father. That was it. Nothing followed that thought.

What he actually felt when he saw the results, was nothing. He felt a certain emptiness that crept under his skin and made him want to bash his head against the wall. He didn't vomit, he didn't faint, he didn't cry nor did he scream. He just felt empty— _so_  empty that it was like his body had become hollow. His limbs felt numb, and he couldn't find his voice to speak. He didn't even have the strength to question whether or not the results were trustworthy, and were not fabricated. He just felt empty, as if his entire soul was ripped from him, and he was left as a shallow skeleton. He didn't know why he lacked a reaction, or why he didn't react the way he thought he would, but he couldn't do anything about it. He was just numb; mentally and physically, and calmly asked Amy to drive him home, since it was already late. It was laundry night.

"It has come to my knowledge that most men cry out of happiness when they discover that they have fathered a child." Amy said solemnly, parking her car in a free spot outside of their apartment. "Or in your case; two children."

Sheldon closed the folder and turned to his friend. "If you are mocking me, I suggest that you refrain from doing so, as it is not working." He quickly unbuckled his seatbelt and exited the car, causing Amy to do the same.

"I wasn't mocking you," the brunette clarified as they entered the lobby, "I was just stating an observation I made after watching soap operas. Though, there were a few where the man got mad and kept on denying the fact that he was the father of the child." She glanced up at the silent physicist who climbed the stairs beside her. "Are you one of those men?"

"Science does not lie, Amy, they give explanations to questions that are hard to answer." The theoretical physicist answered as they reached the second floor landing. "And I honestly doubt that you'd lie to me, or else this mistake will ruin your laboratory's credibility."

Amy hummed, "true. Like I told you, I highly doubt that they'd risk their funding by giving you faulty results. Also, you're not answering the question. I've been watching you for hours now, and I have neither seen you smile nor frown. Are you alright? Does the addition of this new information somehow change your perspective towards Penny's—I mean,  _your_  children?"

They stopped in front of apartment 4A's front door, and Sheldon sighed, tucking the folder under his arm. "Yes, I am fine. And I must admit that I do not have an actual answer to your second question. Though, I am aware of what I had just learned, it seems that it has yet to sink in. My mind is still unable to comprehend that I have been a father for nearly two years, now, and I didn't even know it. Like having a disease of some sort."

"Are you associating the feeling of discovering that you have fathered two children to the feeling of having a terminal disease such as stage four cancer?"

"That's not what I meant," he hissed, taking his keys from his pocket. "I am just saying that—oh, never mind. You will not be able to understand what I'm going through as you are neither a parent nor a sick person. Even I don't understand what I'm talking about."

"Though, I must say, I did not expect you to produce such incredibly aesthetically pleasing offspring." The brunette commented, raising an eyebrow at the physicist. "Much less be able to seduce the blonde goddess that is Penny. But I am shocked to know that it took you  _this_  long to find out. And you call yourself a genius."

Sheldon paused and turned to face the brunette, "you knew?!"

She nodded stoically, pushing her glasses up. "Only someone with terribly bad eyesight would miss the striking resemblance between the three of you. I've had my suspicions when I first saw them, but only confirmed my theory when Penny asked me questions concerning your relationship with the twins, and if I thought that you would be a good father. Rest assured, I only spoke the truth about you; that you were close to the twins, and would be a splendid father. Had Leonard not interrupted our initial plans of producing children. Come to think of it, he only might have done so because he already knew of the twins' existence."

Penny conducted questions of his credibility as a possible father? She had the nerve to somehow hint at him being the twins' father to Amy, yet not to him? Did she ever even considered telling him that he had children?! How could she tell  _everyone_ —he had a hunch that Gregg and Bailey knew about him, too—except him? Was this some sort of plan of hers to further ruin his life? What the blonde did was unfathomable, and he found himself getting angrier and angrier with her as he continued thinking about it. Was him having children supposed to be this big surprise that she would give him when she returned to further make him  _loathe_  her? And he had even restored the trust and friendship he had had once with her!

It was so foolish of him to ever forgive her! It was foolish of him to even miss her presence in his life. Back then, she was just a nuisance that loved mooching off of them and picking on him until she drove him to ban her from the apartment. Now… he didn't even know a word that would properly describe her. She wasn't necessarily a liar—since she never lied to him that he wasn't the father—but she was certainly a bad person for not telling him about the truth! How hard was it to tell him about it before she carelessly dumped the twins on him? And she had the nerve to get mad at him!  _He_  should be mad at her—and he was! He would never be able to get back the one year and nine months that he missed in the twins' lives. He didn't even know how he was supposed to tell anyone that he was a father!

He was going to have to declare the twins as his tax dependents, and in his insurance, too!

… How was he going to tell his  _devout_ , slightly bigoted and somewhat conservative born again Christian mother that he had children out of wedlock?! How was he going to justify that by adding that it took him so long before he knew that he had children—which, would only be adding fuel to the fire! Then, she would realize that he had 'sinned' and would get even angrier! He could not see any scenarios that his mother would be saying 'thank ya' Jesus' with what he had to tell her. All he could see was her beating him up with a bible, then drowning him in holy water whilst spoiling her grandchildren—that was practically the only positive thing that he could see his mother doing. While she continued berating him and shoving religion down his throat, he had no doubt that his mother would rejoice at the knowledge that she finally had grandchildren!

Then, there was Meemaw—she would be so disappointed in him. His loving grandmother always encouraged him to 'find love where he would be happy' and that as long as he didn't hurt anybody in the process, she would understand. She also told him that if he would ever have children, he should be in their lives from the moment that their mother showed signs of being pregnant. He was neither there when Penny first vomited, nor knew that she was even pregnant. That was where his Meemaw would get sad; she would tell him that it was irresponsible for him to get someone pregnant and not be there. How would he be there when no one ever informed him?! Was he just supposed to furrow his eyebrows and have a feeling that he was a father? Although… he was sure that his grandmother would be so much more forgiving than his mother would be, and that gave him a sense of relief.

Then, there was the him of yesterday. The Sheldon that planned on procreating via in vitro fertilization via petri dishes in a lab and getting a surrogate that would carry the future benign overlords that would guide humanity into a better future. Well, Penny could be considered as a surrogate of some sort, so he guessed that he got that done. But, what he didn't do right was choosing the egg donor that was intellectually superior than most and would complement his own intelligence. Instead, he followed Penny's stupid advice of drinking and somehow foolishly chose her. Sheldon from back then would vaporize him, right now. Then, there was the fact that instead of procreating via the scientific way of using in vitro fertilization, he engaged in… he wasn't even going to continue that thought, because the memories of that night still haunted him. He was so disappointed in himself for ever relying on alcohol (which Raj once quoted to be the biggest traitor of them all) to boost his confidence. Look where that got him.

For some reason, he couldn't get himself to say that the twins were a mistake. He had seen many dramas of Raj's that often had the father complaining that his children were a mistake, and wished that he never got the children's mother pregnant. Although a small part of him judged him for getting the one person that was opposite of everything he wanted in choosing a mother pregnant; he did not wish for the twins to not have been not born. Even if he had a time machine (that worked) and allowed him to change that single moment, he wouldn't. First of all, since the twins existed in  _this_  universe, it meant that they existed in  _all_ of the universes and that even if he changed the past, he would still end up having the twins with Penny. Second, now that he found the missing piece of the puzzle, he had finally realized that that warm feeling that he felt whenever he interacted with the twins was l… lo— familial attachment.

He found himself taking back what he had told Leonard—approximately six years, eleven months and three days ago—at the high IQ sperm bank that he wouldn't love his children if they didn't know whether to use an integral or a differential to solve for the area under a curve. Mainly because he knew that the twins weren't dumb (at all) and already proved to be rather intelligent even without him being in their lives from the start. If a Godzilla like creature ever invaded Pasadena, he wouldn't leave the twins as they couldn't run, and would most like find away to bring them with him. Within a month and two weeks, he realized that he cared far more for the twins than he did for Leonard or the others. A week later, he discovered that he was their father, and it only solidified that attachment he had with them. Now, they weren't just two toddlers that Penny had with some (he truly regretted saying this)  _neanderthal_ ; they were two toddlers that Penny had with his lightyears-away-from-being-considered-as-a-neanderthal self. Maybe, he really was a neanderthal for only realizing that he was their father, now. And for unknowingly referring to himself as a neanderthal, beca—

"Sheldon, there you are! We've been looking for you nonstop! We've all been so worried that I got the Wolowitzes to babysit for a while. Where have you been?!"

Then—as if it was magic—all of the 'emptiness' that Sheldon felt was quickly replaced with uncontrollable rage that almost got him to strangle Leonard, had Amy not restrained him from doing so.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?!" Sheldon exclaimed, still being held back by Amy from behind. "Why didn't any of you ever tell me that I was the twins' father?"

Leonard instantly paled, glancing at Raj who had appeared from the apartment, looking like he had just seen a dead body. "Sheldon, I'm sorry—I've always wanted to tell you! But, it's not really my decision and Penny said—"

"Penny said  _what?!_ " The theoretical tried to break free from the brunette's hold, but even with all of the anger building up inside him, he couldn't shrug her off. He had such a strong urge to vent out all of the anger, the frustration, and the uncertainty that had finally decided to appear. At the very moment that he heard his roommate's voice, something in him just snapped and reminded him of all the anger he had with every single one of his friends. They hid something so… important from him; something that he was supposed to know from the start. This was definitely a hundred times worse than the North Pole incident. He had never felt so deceived and lied to, until now. He felt so betrayed—how could they even keep this from him? They were his friends! The situation they had at the North Pole was so much more different than him being a father that he could not see any plausible reason as to why they never told him about this.

Then it hit him—it was Penny who didn't want him to know about the truth. Which made sense, because if she wanted him to know, she would have told him herself! She had more than one chance to tell him the truth, yet she didn't. She didn't even  _try_  to tell him about. All she did was mock him for suggesting the idea of incest and berate him for not treating the twins well. What did she even intend to do by leaving the twins with them without him knowing that he was their father?! Did she just expect him to one day open his eyes and find the connection that he and the twins had? Because it wasn't that simple; he wasn't even sure if that (dreaded) night he had with her was real until he associated it with the scar on his wrist!

Was Penny just expecting him to be happy about all of this?! Because he certainly was not! He might have been happy if everything went according to his plans where  _he_ would select the egg donor, the surrogate and what he was going to have. He never planned on waking up as a father, much less a father of practically two year old twins! The idea of being a parent still had not sank in, but the idea of his friends never telling him, had, and he was not happy. He wasn't even sure about who he was angrier at; Penny, Leonard and the others or himself. He really would never forgive himself for being so blind and utterly stupid to not have seen what was right under his nose. Literally. He had suspected everyone from Howard to a complete stranger on being the twins' father but it never occurred to him that he might be the person he had been looking for since the start. He couldn't even blame it on him not being sure of the night of the Chancellor's Award. Even Amy saw the resemblance, and he was smarter than her.

"Was Penny the one who decided that I not know about my being a father?!" He roared, taking a step forward as Leonard and Raj flinched. "The twins had been in this apartment for nearly two months, now, yet  _none_  of you ever bothered to tell me about the truth! I've been asking you again and again on who the father was, and all you said was that it wasn't you! The twins are turning two years old in a month—did any of you ever even thought of telling me about them within those two years?"

Raj blinked while Leonard simply opened his mouth, then closed it again.

"Answer me! You all have something to say to me, right? Then, tell me why none of you ever bothered to tell me about them!" He felt Amy flinch from the vehemence of his voice and took it as an opportunity to shrug her off before taking one big step forward, and roughly shoving Leonard. "You knew! You knew about all of this and you  _never_  told me! You're supposed to be my best friend, and yet you allowed it to take  _this_  long?"

Leonard nervously glanced up at him, wincing once he saw how angry Sheldon was. "I'm s-sorry… Penny—"

"After all this time, is Penny still the only person you put in top priority?!" Sheldon gave his roommate another shove before both Amy and Raj each grabbed an arm. "I don't care about how much you are obsessed with her, she is not the only one involved in this! Whether you knew about the truth two years, or two months ago, the only information I want to know is  _why_  you people ever thought that keeping this from me would be a good idea. Leonard Hofstadter, you do not understand how absolutely  _outraged_  I am right now, and I suggest that you tread very, very,  _very_  carefully."

The experimental physicist held an arm out to separate himself from his roommate, taking a step back and swallowing the lump in his throat. "J-just give me a chance to explain. I know you're mad, but you have to listen to me—" Sheldon almost lunged at him, but Raj and Amy successfully pulled him back, "—I've always wanted to tell you, but you have to understand that this is mainly Penny's decision. Even if I wanted to tell you, I had to respect Penny's choice of not telling you. I still don't understand Penny's reason of why she chose not to, but I respected it. Because Penny is my friend, and it was her call. I know how much she struggled, Sheldon, and just this once, I'm siding with her."

Sheldon gritted his teeth, and mustered up all the strength he had to  _not_  hurt his roommate. " _Her call?_  Leonard are you not aware that the twins are my children just as much as they are Penny's?! Do you not fully understand the concept of procreation, because I am sure that you do. I've lost almost two years of my progeny's lives! There are so many important milestones that I have missed and will never be apart of. There are so many decisions that I was never allowed to make—like what their names should be, as 'Andrew' and 'Madison' are definitely not my first picks of names for my progeny. I fail to see why you are so calm about this—do you find this whole occurrence funny?"

The bespectacled man frantically shook his head.

"Then give me an acceptable answer that isn't full of cockamamy reasons such as the ones you gave me!" He tried shaking off the grips on his arms, but still found himself unable to break free. "You and I both know that there is not a single answer out there that can be considered as 'right' in this infuriating, unfitting game of charades that we are playing! And I am suggesting—and am giving you  _one_  last chance to redeem yourself—that you tell me the truth  _right this instant_  or else I  _will_  hit you so hard that even my older brother would be proud of me." Sheldon looked Leonard dangerously in the eyes and knew that he had gotten to the point with how his roommate broke the eye contact. " _Now._ "

"Penny didn't want any of us to tell you because she thought that you wouldn't believe her, and that you wouldn't accept the twins. Then, when she agreed on leaving the twins with us, she still didn't want us to tell you because she wanted to see if you would find out and if you would be a good father to them—and if you didn't find out by the time she came back, she was never going to tell you about the truth."

Sheldon stilled, comprehending what Leonard had said.

Penny didn't want him to know the truth because she thought that he wouldn't believe her, and that he wouldn't accept the twins into his life.

Penny left the twins with them so that she could gauge his capacity of being a good parent.

Penny secretly gave him two months to find out by himself, and if he didn't, she would  _never_  tell him and would continue on with her life as if her twins didn't have a father.

Penny really didn't want him in  _their_  offspring's lives.

"And you just allowed her to decide for the twins?" For the first time since he encountered Leonard; his tone became less angry and sounded weary. There was a certain twinge of tiredness that laced through his stern voice that caused him to suddenly be aware of what was happening. He had felt nothing for seven hours now, and within the span of ten minutes, that emptiness changed into anger, then to exasperation. He was tired of searching for answers that he couldn't find. He was tired of running down an endless road. For nearly two months, the mystery of the identity of the twins' father had bothered him nonstop. He wondered about it when they first appeared with their former neighbor, and it annoyed him each time he had time to think about it. And today, that age old question had finally been answered—like a riddle that was hard to solve. The box with a question mark was now opened, and inside, was a picture of himself.

Which brought up even more questions.

He was  _so_  exhausted.

"I do not fully understand why it never occurred to  _any_  of you to tell me the truth, but I am willing to listen." Sheldon tiredly sighed, placing a hand on his forehead as Raj and Amy released his arms. "This entire day has been so exasperating that I will give you a chance to tell me  _everything_. My confusion grows with every second that passes, and the idea of finding answers on my own is no longer as appealing as it used to seem."

Leonard lowered the arm he held up in defense, "we have some tea inside. This is going to be along story."

Sheldon closed his eyes and sucked in an irritated breath. Maybe, he  _should_  have punched Leonard. "I don't care. All I want is to get the answers. And some chamomile tea," he turned to Raj who quickly nodded and ran back into the apartment. "Will you be staying with us, Amy?"

The neuroscientist calmly shook her head, "I'm afraid that it is getting late, and I have yet to feed Ricky." She placed a hand on his shoulder, softly patting it. "Maybe, some other time. This is something you have to listen to on your own, Sheldon. I wish for your level headedness during the duress of this discussion. Goodnight." With a slight nod, Amy turned and left, leaving Sheldon and Leonard standing in the middle of the hall.

Leonard gestured towards the apartment and Sheldon went inside to take a seat on his spot. "Where do you want me to start?"

Raj handed the cup of tea to Sheldon, then scurried out of the apartment with a wave. "You will start at the actual start."

The experimental physicist nodded, taking a seat on the beige armchair. "It all started in late August, two years ago…"

* * *

**August 2010**

* * *

"If you do not stop with all that sighing, I  _will_  throw this stapler at you, Leonard."

Leonard turned his head to look at Sheldon, "I'm sorry. I just—I just can't forget about her."

Sheldon snorted, sliding a glance at him then back at his laptop. "It has been four months since that traitor left, I believe that it is ample time to 'move on.'"

Four months, one week, and two days since Penny left Pasadena without a single goodbye. It had been that long since Penny broke up with him and decided to leave. He never understood why she had to leave, and why she left, but he always thought that it was what she needed. He always knew that Penny wanted something… more in her life, and she still had yet to find it. It hurt a lot to know that she didn't love him as much as he loved her, but he always guessed that Penny just needed time. Everyone needs time to find themselves at one point, and this was hers. Raj once said that it was 'soul searching' and that Penny was just doing her own version of  _Eat, Pray, Love_. Bernadette even said that this change in Penny's life might be good for her, like a breath of fresh air. Penny had been chasing her dreams for five years, now, and other than that production of  _Anne Frank_  above the bowling alley, she had not gotten an acting job.

He always heard her talking about an audition she was going to go to, and that it was going to be her big break. Like what any good boyfriend would do, he simply smiled and told her that she was going to do great—even if he knew that it would be yet another one of those failed auditions she cried over. He never told her, but he counted each audition that only further upset her; she had already gone to a total of thirty two auditions that was never the big break that she was looking for. Before she'd go to the audition, she'd text him about how excited she was, and how confident she was that she'd get pick cause all of the other girls all looked fake. Then roughly an hour later, she'd send him a single text saying that she didn't make it. Then when he got home, she'd tell him all about it, and he'd try to comfort her, and Penny would tell him about how she dreamt of being an actress.

Penny always wanted to be one of those types of actresses, and it showed in her dedication of going to audition after audition. She applied to be a waitress at the Cheesecake Factory so that she could support her strive to become an actress. She had supposedly moved out to California with Kurt—who planned on being a stuntman—just to follow that dream of hers. It was foolish and reckless, but Penny told him that a lot of actresses started out as a waitress. That one day, she was going to get rid of that hideous yellow uniform and replace it with gowns made by famous designers that she would wear at her premiers. He might not have supported her dream as much as she expected him to, but he did respect it. Which was why when she left, he reasoned it out that it was because of her unsuccessful acting career. That she just needed some time off.

If he believed that that was the  _real_  reason she left, he wouldn't get hurt. He wouldn't have died a little on the inside when he and Sheldon found her apartment empty. He wouldn't have tried everything to track her down, and to get her back. He wouldn't have had cried himself to sleep during the night that she left. He wouldn't have spent the last four months crying at night, and hugging the pillow she used to sleep on and pretending that it was her. Because she had hurt him far more than he allowed her to hurt him. Everything in the apartment building reminded him of her, and it was hard to move on from her if that was the case. Everywhere he went, all he saw was Penny with him. It was like a curse of some sort that was eating him alive. He had never felt as heartbroken as he had felt with her, and he couldn't understand why she had left him.

She didn't understand how much she had hurt him by leaving him. He would have accepted it if they had just broken up like every other couple in the world did, but allowing her to slip through his fingers killed him. It was as if he did something wrong that drove her away—he just loved her! What was so wrong about loving someone? He knew that Penny had commitment issues, but he didn't expect her to get deceived by Wil Wheaton that easily! He didn't expect her to break up with him over her being uncomfortable of him being at a different pace in their relationship than where she was! He didn't expect to come back from work with Sheldon, only to find out from their landlord that Penny had cancelled her lease on her apartment. He didn't expect to see an empty apartment when he used their emergency key to check if she really was gone. He didn't expect himself to feel so empty when it finally sank in; that Penny was gone.

In the first two weeks, he had been in denial that Penny left, even with how Sheldon constantly complained about how he wasn't able to buy a gift for Professor Lancaster. He told himself that Penny was just taking a vacation for a week or so, and when he came home from work, he would see Penny. He would see her luscious blonde hair, her sun kissed skin, her bright green eyes and her beautiful smile greeting him once they meet at the lobby. He didn't care if they weren't together, as long as he got to see her and talk to her, he'd be okay. He often daydreamed of him sitting alone in their apartment, then Penny would arrive and would declare that she loved him. He even hoped that it would happen; he was  _desperate_  for it to happen—he would give anything for it to happen!

But, it never did. Penny never greeted him in the lobby; nor burst in their apartment to declare her love for him, nor returned to Pasadena. She didn't go on a vacation like what he forced himself to believe, and she never returned. It was a little after that that everything finally sank in, and that his heart finally broke. He couldn't help crying, and singing along to sentimental songs that often was of the singer's heartbreak—because that was what happened to him; he was heartbroken. He was depressed, and all he could think about was  _why_  Penny left. Why she broke up with him. Why she didn't find him good enough for her. Why his love wasn't good enough for her. Why she didn't even say goodbye. Why everything was even more painful than when Penny got up and left the bowling alley. It was a million times more painful, and he was shocked that his body hadn't given up from all of the pain.

Nothing changed for him during the next months of Penny's absence, if not for a giant part of his heart missing. Everything was as gloomy and depressing as it always was, and Sheldon was even more annoying than ever. On the third month mark of Penny leaving, Professor Lancaster died, and Sheldon discovered that the old man referred to him as the only person who didn't give him a birthday present. Sheldon spent the entire day writing a list of every bad thing that Penny ever did to him, and for once, he didn't berate him for doing it. What he did was sing along to the comforting music of  _Alannis Morissette_  and various singers of the 80's and 90's who seemed to be experts on heartbreak. Like  _Toni Braxton's Un-break My Heart_. He couldn't even argue with Sheldon when he started declaring all of Penny's strikes. He didn't have the will to do anything, actually. He was that hurt.

There was just something that died in him when the blonde left, and he noticed that everything in his life had missed something vital. Life was just less lively when she left… like he was just living for the sake of living. Penny was a black hole that sucked the life out of all of them—everyone, except Sheldon. Unlike Raj and Howard who usually got sentimental while they ate takeout, and played HALO, Sheldon always whined on how they were making the apartment gloomy. Whenever the three of them reminisced about Penny, Sheldon always threatened to give them strikes. Sheldon also never failed to point out the fact that his life was better without the blonde; whether it was because of no one mooching off them, or not watching the reality shows that Penny loved. It sometimes offended him at how ill Sheldon spoke of his ex-girlfriend, but then he remembered how much Sheldon hated change.

Sheldon hating on Penny was just his way of coping with Penny leaving. With everyone single one of them (even Bernadette) practically mourning over Penny's departure, it was only Sheldon who did not cry. It was always Sheldon who snapped them out of their troubled thoughts, and reminded them that they had other things to do. Regardless of the cold front his roommate put on, he knew that on the inside, Sheldon was really hurt on how Penny didn't say goodbye. While they cried, Sheldon leaned on hating on Penny to avoid missing her. But, there were times when he caught Sheldon staring at 4B's door, as if he was waiting for Penny to appear. Then when they played and lost to Sheldon in HALO, he didn't seem as happy as he did when he fought against Penny. And whenever they ate dinner, he'd pause for awhile, like he was waiting for someone to enter the apartment, looking for food.

Penny's absence made all of them miserable.

He released another sigh—causing Sheldon to grumble—and pulled his luggage to the side of the door. "That's why I'm taking a vacation. So, I can clear my head to think."

"I do not understand your need to leave," Sheldon said, standing and grabbing his jacket. "Who's going to drive me to work? Buy me food? Commit foolish mistakes for me to correct?"

"I already got Howard and Raj to drive for you, and to watch over you. They'll be here all the time, and you can always get Amy to accompany you. And I'm just a phone call away."

Leonard chuckled softly at his roommate's childishness. He was going away for a week, just so he could clear his mind. He had hated how mopey and depressed he had become, and decided that it was time for him to get over Penny. He originally thought of just going to Disneyland or some science observatory, but Raj suggested that he get some R&R somewhere far. So, he decided to stop by his parent's house before heading to New York for a half a week of exploring the city, hoping that he wouldn't get mugged. He even had an offer to do a guest lecture at Princeton and NYU, that he was thinking of taking. It would be nice to have his mind off Penny and inspiring more grad students to join the field of experimental physics, but he still hadn't given them an answer. He wasn't sure if he was going to stay in New Jersey longer or fly off to New York. He had a whole week to waste, and he could do anything in between.

"But, where are you even going?"

Leonard glanced over his shoulder as he leaned down to check his email. "I'm not telling you where exactly, but I will stop by our house to catch up with my mom. It's been a while since I've seen my siblings, so I might spend a day or two there. Then I'm not sure where I'll fly off to," he had one new email, "but I can assure you, I'll be back in a week."

"You should! I've already had to adjust to one change in my life, don't add another!"

The email was from Penny.

Checking to see if Sheldon could see, he opened the email and resisted crying.

 **SUBJECT:**   _Hi_

 **FROM:**   _Pennyblossom_

 **TO:**   _LeonardHofstadter_

_Hey Leonard,_

_I know it's been a while since we've last talked, and saw each other, but I was wondering if you could meet up with me here in Nebraska? I saw the monthly email that Sheldon sends everyone, and he mentioned it there that you were taking a vacation to New Jersey. I know it's a bit out of the way, but I hope that you can so that we can talk. I'll understand if you don't ever want to see me again, and just ignore this if you do._

_Wishing you well,_

_Penny_

"Raj is already here to pick you up," Sheldon informed, putting on his windbreaker. "Let's go before I stop you from leaving."

"Yeah, why don't you go ahead? I just have to fix my laptop then I'll follow."

Sheldon stared at him for another moment before nodding, "alright. But hurry up, I'm not waiting for anything longer than ten minutes." He glanced at the luggage then exited the apartment.

 **SUBJECT** :  **Re** :  _Hi_

 **FROM** :  _LeonardHofstadter_

 **TO** : Pennyblossom

_Hi Penny!_

_You don't know how much I missed you, and how much I've been waiting for you to finally reply to any of my messages. This might be the first time I've ever been glad that Sheldon did something. Of course, I'll meet up with you! Just send me where we'll meet up, and I'll be there._

_Looking forward to seeing you again,_

_Leonard_

_P.S. There will never be a time that I didn't want to see you, Penny. I mean it._

* * *

**Lincoln, Nebraska;**  one day later.

* * *

Leonard hastily wiped his sweaty palms on his pants as he looked around the street.

He was so excited in meeting Penny again, that he once he reached the airport he bought a one way ticket to Nebraska and disregarded the one he had for New Jersey. He didn't tell Sheldon or Raj about it, and told his mother that he was going to Chicago, first. No one had to know that he was going to see Penny again, and that he was going to try to convince her to get back together. Even if she had hurt him far more than anyone had ever hurt him, he still loved her—he might even love her more than he had ever loved anyone. Relatives included. There was just this spark of hope that told him that this trip was going to mend his broken relationship with her. It told him that Penny wanted to see him so that they could talk about their relationship, now that she had finally had time to think.

But, his nervousness had rivaled his excitement, which was why it took him a full day before telling Penny that he was going to meet up with her. He was in his hotel room for an entire day, practicing on how to greet her. He even watched countless videos on Youtube on how to properly greet and ex that would somehow give them a hint that he was still interested in seeing her. Then it took him another few hours to pick what he was supposed to wear; was he supposed to wear a suit, or something a bit less formal, or something more casual—in the end, he chose his normal clothes. Apparently, acting like you had moved on was more attractive, and he was going with that. Even if he'd beg on his knees just for Penny to take him back. And cry until Penny decided to love him.

Taking in a deep breath, he entered the restaurant.

The place she picked wasn't too fancy, but it wasn't shabby either. It was filled with people who were eating and chatting, and he quickly started his search for Penny. The restaurant was actually big, and it took him a while before he reached the far part of the restaurant that was mostly full of booths. The restaurant was pretty casual, and he was glad that he didn't wear anything too over the top that Penny would disapprove of. This was his second chance with her, and he didn't want to screw it up. He spent an entire day trying to get everything to be perfect, and he wasn't going to fail, now. For four months, he had done nothing but imagine how he and Penny would meet again, and how she'd finally say that she really was in love with him, and that it was stupid of her to ever leave. Then, at the farthest booth in the restaurant, he found two blondes who were talking to each other. The blonde that was facing his direction looked like an older version of Penny, and based on the pictures in her apartment, was most likely her older sister. In front of her was Penny, who had her back to him; then her sister noticed him, and pointed towards his direction.

It was like his world went into slow motion as Penny turned to face him—the sunlight from the window accentuating her beautiful face—and smiled.

That single moment nearly took his breath away, and he felt his heart hitch in his throat. It reminded him of why he fell in love her, and why he loved her. He saw all the beauty she had—inside and out—and it only made him die a little more inside when he remembered that he had lost her. That this was his only chance to have the future he always wanted to have with her. When he first met her, he had fallen in love with the idea of being that nerd who ended up with the beautiful girl who would never had so much as looked at him in school. He drooled at the idea of all of those guys who beat him up in high school wishing that they had the life he had; successful career, financial stability and the blonde bombshell that could get any head to turn for her. It was any  _geek's_  dream, and it was his reality when she finally went out with him.

However, when he got to know her, he saw that there was so much more to her than being a pretty face. She was this person who took a chance on them—even if they embarrassed her most of the time—and treated them like how a normal person would. She went out of her way to get to know each and every single one of them, and often tried to get them out of the shell they hid in. She treated Sheldon and Howard with patience and understanding, even though she snapped at them often, and was the one who found a way to get Raj to talk via alcohol. Unlike the stereotypical women in his university days, Penny didn't tease him or make fun of him; she treated him with actual kindness that made him love her, even before they got together. Penny was such a dream come true to him, that her absence turned everything gray. But, seeing her again instantly colored the grays, and he didn't even realize that he was already walking towards her.

"I'll be at the next table," he heard Penny's sister say, standing from the booth, "you'll need to do this alone."

Leonard gave the older blonde a small smile—which she returned before moving to the next table—and stood in front of the table, unsure of what to say.

"Leonard, I'm not sure how I'm going to tell you this, but I will."

He watched the blonde scoot over to the end of the booth before slowly standing up to stand in front of him. Her hair was longer, but everything else was the same. Her beautiful sunshine like smile, her sun kissed skin, and her gorgeous green eyes that always reminded him of spring and summer. He took in her beauty for another moment, before he saw the single difference in her appearance.

"Y-you're pregnant?!" He took a step back to look down at her stomach where the little bump was starting to show, pushing against the satin fabric of her dress.

Penny nodded, placing a hand on the bump. Had he not  _been_  with Penny and knew about her taut body, he would never have noticed it. "Yup. I'm twenty-three weeks pregnant."

Leonard opened his mouth, then closed it. He couldn't explain how he felt; it was shock, excitement and happiness rolled all into one big emotion. He was going to be a father! An actual father, with Penny as the mother! This was everything he had wanted since the first time he had ever laid eyes on the blonde. Inside Penny was  _their_  smart and beautiful progeny that he was already excited to meet. This was why Penny called him, because she wanted to get back together with him to start a family. They were going to have a  _family!_ Even if they don't get married, or ever end up together (he hoped not) they would always have this wonderful creature that would bind them forever. When this little one is born, there will be a living proof of the love that they had shared, and will share. He didn't care if it was a boy, or a girl; he just wanted to meet him/her as quickly as possible.

"I'm…" he blinked, readjusting his glasses, "going to be a—"

"You're not the father," Penny calmly interjected, "I'm sorry."

"What…?" Leonard shakily asked, feeling his heart breaking into a  _billion_  pieces. "What do you mean that I'm not the father? That's impossible—I'm your boyfriend! And twenty-three weeks ago was a little before we broke up… did you cheat on me?"

He painfully watched as Penny closed her eyes and breathed in. When she opened them again, he saw the sternness in her eyes and felt his stomach drop. This was real, this was happening, and it barely took a second for Penny to shatter his dreams. "Yes. I cheated on you a week before we broke up. I'd have to be twenty-two or twenty-four weeks pregnant for you to be the father, and we didn't have sex during the entire week that we were preparing Sheldon for that award of his."

He placed a hand on his forehead as he took everything in. Penny—the love of his life—had cheated on him, before breaking his heart. He hoped that he would just wake up, already, and call it a nightmare. But no matter how much he dug his fingers against his forehead, he wasn't waking up. He wanted to be angry, but all he felt was sadness. Sadness that was even more intense than the one he felt when she left. Because now, he knew why she left him, and why everything was so painful. It was if she grabbed a knife and drove it to his heart, twisting it until his heart gave up. He had the strong urge to cry, but the tears just weren't coming, and he didn't know why. All he knew was that he'd give everything for this to not be real, because it hurt too much.

Penny broke his heart for the third time.

"If it's not me… then, who's the bastard that you cheated on me with?!"

The blonde had a torn expression on her face, and she protectively placed a hand on her stomach, as if he was going to hurt her. He'd never hurt her like how she hurt him. "I know you're going to be mad, but you need to know the truth. The father is…" Leonard held his breath and hoped that it wasn't anyone he knew. "It's Sheldon. The night of the Chancellor's Award, the two of us got really drunk and one thing led to another—but I didn't mean to do it. I wouldn't cheat on you on purpose, you know that."

He felt the color drain from his face as he repeated what Penny had said in his mind. He wasn't the father of Penny's unborn child, and it was  _Sheldon_. His quirky, condescending, rude, arrogant, insouciant, cocky, selfish and childish roommate that couldn't even ride the bus without dousing the seat with alcohol and attaching his own set of bungee cords to act as a seat belt. The one who would rather jump off a cliff than engage in any type of physical contact that could possibly get him sick. The one who had always chided him on saying hi to Penny on the day that she moved in. The one who never failed in expressing his disdain towards her, and how he hated the fact that she was in their lives. The same man who—not long ago—said that he hated their former neighbor, had gotten her pregnant.

He chuckled loudly and saw Penny's sister cautiously moving close to them. "You're joking right? We're talking about  _Sheldon_ , here, Penny. He hates germs, touching, the idea of romance, and—once upon a time—you! It's practically impossible that he had sex with you, much less get you pregnant!" He smirked at her, despite the fact that he wanted to scream and cry and vent out all of the anger that was boiling up inside him. He was already tired of getting hurt, that it seemed better to pretend that he wasn't hurting. If he didn't show her his real feelings, she wouldn't know what his weakness was. She wouldn't know that if she told him to jump, he'd jump. That he felt as if his world was crumbling around him as his mind processed the fact that she cheated on him with his best friend. It was if he was a character in one of those shows that Raj loved. "There's still a big chance that I'm the father! I mean, they have a weird way of knowing when the baby was conceived, right? So, it could still mean that I'm going to be a dad!"

He felt so pathetic.

Penny bit her lip and grabbed something from her purse and handed it to him. "I'm pregnant with twins, and there are no twins in our family."

He sucked in a breath as he looked at the sonogram of two figures that already looked like little babies. Even if it was kind of impossible to tell, he saw that one of the faces already looked like his neurotic roommate. This was when everything in his mind shut down due to all of the pain and anger that was stuck in his system. There was little to no chance that he was the father. It was heart crushing, and he already felt a tear slide down his cheeks as he comprehended the situation. It wasn't a nightmare, nor a dream—this was real. He wasn't going to get the happy ending that he always wanted to have with her. He wasn't going to get the second chance that he so desperately wanted. He wasn't going to have the smart and beautiful babies that were already slowly making their way into the world. Instead, it was Sheldon who was getting a chance at what he wanted, and he didn't even know how lucky he was. Damn bastard.

"I—if Sheldon's the father, then why didn't you tell him?" He asked, once he finally found his voice, and the strength to speak. "Why did you ask me to go, and not him?"

He saw a flash of pain and fear flash into Penny's green eyes and had the urge to grab a chair, take it back to Pasadena and bash it on Sheldon's head. He was angry at his roommate for taking everything he dreamed about, and for never telling him that Penny cheated on him with him. And for the hurt yet guilty expression that Penny had when he mentioned Sheldon—she never had that expression when she talked to him. "I didn't tell him because I was scared… scared that he wouldn't believe me, and that he wouldn't accept the situation. Sheldon doesn't like change—you know that, and this is one big change that he's definitely not going to like. He'd call me a liar and say that I'm just doing this to mooch of off him. You know him better than I do, and you know that Sheldon and as a father are never used in the same sentence. He might love a robot more than these children in me."

Penny sighed, looking out the window while deep in thought. "I know I'm not ready to be a mother, nor am I even slightly mother material, but I'm not giving these children up. I fell in love with them from the first moment that I saw them on the monitor, and when I heard their heartbeats. I'm going to do this even without Sheldon, and I called you here because it was killing me to keep it a secret. Someone had to know—anyone that wasn't a part of my family." She turned back to him, and the sunlight hit the tears that had rolled down her cheeks. "I chose you because I knew that you'd understand, and because I thought that we needed a proper way of having closure. Because I want to apologize for all the pain that I've caused you, and the next ones I'll cause whenever you remember me. I'm trying to change, you know. For these two little ones."

"Did you love him? … Sheldon?"

The blonde laughed lightly and for a moment, Leonard felt all of the pain disappear. "I do, but as a friend. All of you are very close to my heart, which is why I had to move back, here. I have to find myself, because I no longer feel whole. I no longer felt like I was still the same ambitious girl that you met at the hall, and found it hard to find happiness. And I'm sorry that I'm making it seem like it was because of my relationship with you—cause, it's not. This was something I had to do for myself, and the twins were just the surprise that was waiting for me. I've stopped drinking ever since I discovered that I was pregnant, and am never going back there again." Penny had a wistful smile on her face, and he wished that it didn't hurt this much to know the truth. "I felt like I didn't know myself, but slowly, I'm trying to change my life. I'm going to be a mom soon, and two children are going to be relying on me for quite a while. I have to fix myself for them."

The honesty and the sincerity in her answer made him wonder what he was going to ask next. He was going down a road that was going to make it impossible to turn back, but he was going to continue anyway. "Did you love me?"

"I did, don't ever question that."

"D-do you still love me?"

The sad smile she had, alone, told him the answer to his question, and it made his heart sink even farther. It was game over for team Leonard, and all he could do was stop himself from breaking down in front of Penny and her sister. "You'll always have a place in my heart, Leonard. You'll always be the guy that changed it all, but now, the ones with the biggest spot here," she tapped a finger on the middle of her chest, "are my children. But never doubt the fact that I loved you just because I couldn't say it to you. I wasn't ready then, but I am, now. The only problem is that it's gone, and I'm sorry for breaking your heart. I don't know how much I hurt you, but I know that I did, and I hope you forgive me. It doesn't have to be today, or tomorrow, but I just hope that you do, one day."

For some reason, her words made him cry. He couldn't hold the tears back anymore, and he just allowed them to gradually flow out. It was the day that he really lost Penny, and it hurt so much. When she left, he thought that it was the worse she could do to him. The scan photo in his hand was the proof that it was the end of the line for his love for her, and it hurt more to know that Sheldon was the reason why he was feeling so much sadness. But, he couldn't get himself to hate Penny, nor the twins inside her. Instead, he felt an odd sense of responsibility that stemmed from his responsibility over Sheldon. He couldn't allow Penny to suffer because of what Sheldon did. He wasn't going to allow those innocent kids to get neglected—but, he didn't want Sheldon to know about them, yet. It was selfish, but he was angry, and hurt and confused. He didn't even know what he was supposed to do next.

"I'm going to deposit money into your account that you can use for your check ups and the vitamins you'll need." He said once he cleared his tears. He noticed Penny about to protest and he quickly shook his head. "There's still a chance that they are mine, and I'm not just going to abandon that possibility. And if they really are Sheldon's, then consider me as the person who'll stand in for Sheldon. He won't be happy if he finds out that I didn't do anything to ensure the wellbeing of his progeny."

"You don't have to—"

"I don't, but I will, Penny." He sent her a sad smile and raised the picture, "I'm going to keep this. Please regularly update me about how the babies are doing, and I'll try to visit at least once a month. I still have the same contact information, so don't forget to text me about everything." He placed the picture inside his bag and took out his checkbook. "I'm going to see this through with you, and you can't do anything about it."

Penny blinked at him, and sighed again. "I won't stop you, but just so you'd promise me that you won't tell Sheldon. I'm not ready to tell him, yet."

Leonard nodded, handing her the check he made out to her. "Here, use that for anything you want to. Sheldon won't be happy if he ever discovers that I didn't do anything to make sure that his children will have everything they need. And don't worry, I won't tell him unless you tell me, too."

Penny smiled, and this time, it was an actual smile of hers. "Thank you for everything, Leonard."

He spent the next twelve hours venting out his anger at an arcade that was near the restaurant, and wishing that he never left Penny alone with Sheldon during the night of the Chancellor's Award.

* * *

One month; that was how much time had passed since he met with Penny again.

It was also the exact duration of how long he had been ignoring Sheldon.

Ever since he came back from his trip to Nebraska and New York (he still went through with that) he suddenly found himself inexplicably angry with his roommate. He noticed every single annoying thing he did, and it took everything he had to  _not_  snap at his roommate. Each time he looked at Sheldon, all he saw was how he betrayed him and how he ruined the happy ending that he and Penny was supposed to have. How he was the reason why he wasn't happy right now, and why he still felt so hurt after what Penny did. What made it worse was how Sheldon still kept on talking badly about Penny, as if nothing happened between them. Like he didn't betray his trust by sleeping with  _his_  girlfriend. Like he didn't do something so unforgivable, that most men would have killed him by now.

Each time he thought of doing something bad to his roommate, the image of the fetuses would pop into his head, and he didn't want them to be fatherless. Even though he hated the idea of Sheldon fathering Penny's children, what's done was done, and he had to accept it. He may have told Penny that he still believed in the small possibility that he was the father, but he knew that it really was Sheldon. One of the fetuses already looked like him, and it would be a lie to say that there were twins in his family. There was none, and the only person he knew who had a twin was none other than Sheldon. It really was infuriating, and there wasn't a day that he didn't want to throw Sheldon out of the window for taking everything he wanted. Sheldon may not be in love with Penny, but those two unborn children would be the living proof that there could have been something. Those children would bind the two in ways that he would never experience with Penny.

Which started his cold shoulder act on Sheldon, and why he chose not to interact with him. At all. He hadn't even talked to him since he came back from his vacation, because he knew that if he did, he wasn't going to hold back. Somehow, he expected Penny to hurt him, one day—but he never expected Sheldon to hurt him. Heck, he didn't even thought that Sheldon would be capable of doing that to him! He was supposed to be the last person to  _ever_  hurt him in the way that he did! He'd always expected Howard or maybe Raj to somehow steal Penny from him (he strongly doubted it, though) but not Sheldon. Not his innocent, somewhat gullible, childish and number one Penny hater, Sheldon. There was no hint that this would ever happen, and that's what made him even more mad. Because he couldn't really get mad at Penny—or her unborn children—for cheating on him, because he loved her so much.

What made him even more furious, was that he couldn't get himself to get mad at Sheldon.

It was crazy, because any sane man would get pissed and get all angry if his girlfriend cheated on him with his girlfriend. And that was exactly what happened to him! When he first got home, he imagined himself punching Sheldon while yelling loud enough that he would admit to what he did. Instead, he just gave him the silent treatment; one, Penny asked him to not tell Sheldon, and two, he really couldn't get angry at his roommate. Sheldon was many things, but he knew that he wouldn't intentionally hurt him. That was how much he knew and believed in Sheldon, and it he hated himself for not being able to get mad at him. He had been his roommate for  _ten_  long years, now—that was the longest time he'd live with someone who wasn't his family. Actually, in all honesty, Sheldon  _was_ his family—in the heterosexual way, of course.

Sheldon didn't show it much (or at all) but he knew that he cared about him, in his own way. Like when he lied to Penny about not being able to her version of  _Rent_ ; Sheldon went out of his way to conjure up a brand new lie that would further make him look good. Even if Sheldon was annoying most of the time, he was more of a sibling to him than any of his actual siblings were. Sheldon was the brother he never had—or asked for—and he was the person whom he trusted the most. Even now, that he knew the truth, he still trusted his roommate more than anyone else in the world. Even if he was bat crap crazy, condescending, selfish and incredibly annoying, he was already used to him and wouldn't change anything. Give or take five traits—but if he couldn't, then he'd be okay with Sheldon. Just as long as he didn't multiply into two Sheldons… well, there were already two on the way, and he sincerely hoped that they only got Sheldon's good traits (like height and his ultra intelligent brain) and got everything else from Penny.

… Sheldon and Penny were going to have twins.

Thinking about it actually hurt more than he thought.

"—Leonard, I have been talking to myself for nearly half an hour, now! Will you quit daydreaming about Penny, and listen to me?"

Leonard quickly snapped out of his thoughts and turned to face his roommate who was fuming on his spot. He didn't know why Sheldon was so mad, when he hadn't talked to him since before he left for Nebraska. "What?"

Sheldon snorted at him, "honestly, has that traitor damaged you that much that you are no longer unable to process people talking to you? I told you that talking to that woman was a mista—"

"Stop talking to Penny like that!" Leonard groused, bolting from his chair. "Penny is your friend, and friends don't talk to each other like that! What did Penny even do to make you so mad at her, huh?" He noticed how Sheldon stilled, and he continued, "what even makes you think that you have the right to get mad at her?! If  _anyone_  should be mad at her, it's me! Not you!"

The theoretical physicist blinked, looking startled at his sudden outburst. "Penny was no longer my friend the moment that she left this city. You know how I suffered during Professor Lancaster's birthday, Leonard. You know how  _I've_  suffered throughout the years of Penny being in o—"

"Penny has done  _nothing_  but understand and care for you!" He growled, not wanting to hear what his roommate was about to say next. "She's been nothing but kind to you, and this is how you treat her?! After everything you've done to her, that's how you treat her? After how the two of you hurt me? Are you really that heartless? Is it so hard for you to just be normal for once and act responsible for your actions? Is my misery causing you so much happiness that you even have the audacity to pour salt on my wounds?!"

Sheldon clenched his jaw, and Leonard saw the brief glint of hurt that flashed across his face. "I'm not sure on why you're so mad, but I do not know of what you're trying to imply. Nor do I know of how I hurt you." The lanky man stood, staring at him with confused eyes, "Penny and I will never be friends, again. And though I never approved of your relationship with her, I do not find happiness in your misery. I may be glad that I predicted the outcome right, but I am not happy that you were hurt. It confuses me how you claim on me doing so."

It dawned to him that Sheldon didn't know anything about the night that he shared with Penny. He didn't do it on purpose, nor did he do it to hurt him—and he had not a single clue of what that gap in his mind had done to Penny.

"I'm sorry, Sheldon," Leonard muttered, running a hand through his hair as he sat back down on his chair. "I—you know how much I got hurt after what Penny did, and I'm sorry for venting my anger out at you. You didn't do anything wrong, I'm sorry."

Sheldon was watching him closely before heading to the kitchen. "Apology accepted, and I must warn you; if you do that again, I will award you two more strikes." Leonard groaned, he already had two strikes. "Now, you are clearly upset. Would you like chamomile or earl grey?"

* * *

**November 2010**

* * *

In the past three months, he tried to visit Penny in Nebraska at least once a month.

Leonard always left on the weekends, taking a day trip to Omaha to check on how Penny was doing. Sheldon often questioned him on where he went—he had started talking to him, again—and he always replied that he was taking a day off. His quirky roommate wasn't happy of course, but ever since the outburst he had, Sheldon chose not to press on more about his affairs. It was a bit pricey to keep up this little monthly trip out to check on Penny and the unborn mini Sheldons, but someone had to take responsibility of them. Plus, unbeknownst to Sheldon (and he doubted that he would get mad if he does find out) he took a few of his surprisingly  _big_  paychecks to pay for anything that Penny and the twins would need. He also gave her some money from his own pocket, of course. He wasn't going to allow Penny to have problems during her pregnancy, especially if he could help.

Penny updated him on everything about her pregnancy, and he fell in love with the two unborn children with each check up that they went through. He also grew guilty of not telling Sheldon with each day that passed. He really, really,  _really_  wanted to tell his roommate, however, Penny begged him not to tell him. She reasoned it out that if Sheldon finds out the truth, he wouldn't accept them and would only make it worse. He tried convincing her to allow him to tell Sheldon, but she wouldn't let him. And he didn't want to tell him without her permission, even if Sheldon deserved to know about her pregnancy. He often wondered what Penny's real reason of not telling Sheldon was, but she often changed the topic when he asked her about it. He didn't really understand her decision, but he respected it, and he hoped that Sheldon would find out someday soon.

He really didn't want to let the twins grow up without a father, and although he'd  _kill_  for it to be him, he couldn't.  _Sheldon_  was their father, whether he liked it or not. Well, he did accept that, now, since he wasn't angry at all—but there was still a part of him that wished that Penny would be wrong. He still had hope that there would be a miracle that they were his, and them being twins was just a happy surprise. If he was really their father, he'd do anything for them. He would leave everything and everyone in Pasadena to move out and be with Penny in Nebraska. He'd be there for them from the start—which, he already had—and he wouldn't let anyone or anything hurt them. He knew that he would be a great dad, and it still hurt him to know that it wasn't him. It also hurt him that the twins wouldn't get to know their real father anytime soon.

Even if he wasn't their biological father, he was more than willing to step up and  _be_  their father. He'd take complete responsibility—he'd even marry Penny if she wanted to! But, Penny kept on telling him that she didn't want them to be a burden in his life, and that it would be cruel of her to pretend that the twins  _weren't_  Sheldon's. He could pretend that they were his, he really could! he had been in their lives before they were even born, and he had already loved them. He didn't care if they came out with Sheldon's big head and signature condescension, he'd love them either way! He loved them even though he knew that they weren't his, and the only thing about it that made him sad, was that he loved them more than he loved Penny. He wasn't staying for her, he was staying for them—even, if it was until they met their real father.

"Leonard, there you are!"

He turned his head into the direction of the voice and adjusted the bouquet of flowers and giant teddy bear in his hands before walking towards Penny's older sister. "How is she? How are the twins? Are they okay? Aren't they a bit early?"

The older version of Penny smiled softly and gestured for him to follow her. "They're all fine. Penny was originally due to give birth on December five, but since twins tend to come early, she was said to go into labor anytime after November ten—which was two days ago. But on the eight, Penny's water broke and we immediately brought her, here. She went into labor, and gave birth to the twins a little after midnight." They rounded a corner and continued to walk down the hall. "They're a day early, but the doctor said that they were healthy little babies, and that there are no problems." They stopped on front of a door, and Penny's sister gave him a smile. "They're inside."

Leonard grinned as she opened the door for him, and he stepped inside. He found two bassinets, with one baby inside, that was beside Penny's bed. "Hi."

Penny tore her attention from the little baby in her arms and turned to him, a smile gracing her even more radiantly beautiful face. "Hey, Leonard. Ready to meet your god kids?" The godparent bit might have hurt him before—effectively killing off any chances that he was the twins' father—but today, it didn't seem so bad. He gingerly nodded and placed the flowers and the bear on the table before walking over to the bed. Penny extended her arms to him and he reached down to take the baby into his arms. He held back a sob as he stared at the baby wrapped in a blue cloth that was in his arms; he never knew that newborn babies were so beautiful and heart touching. This baby had thin blonde hair, striking light blue eyes and a face that was most definitely Penny's. He had the same shape of her eyes, her nose, her ears and he could already tell that this one was going to look like a male version of her when he grew up. "What's his name?"

"I named him Andrew Charles," Penny happily said as she picked up her other baby. "Andrew; because I want him to be called Andy and have a Woody doll—from  _Toy Story_ —when he grows up. Mainly because we were watching  _Toy Story 3_  before I went into labour and thought that it would be cute if I got him all of the toys from the movie. And I chose Charles, because of  _Professor X_." Leonard sent her a look of confusion, and Penny smiled at him. "Isn't  _Professor X_  Sheldon's favorite  _X-Men?_  I would have gone with either of  _the Flash_  characters, but their real names didn't sound good with Andrew."

"Are you sure you didn't name him after the princes of England?" Leonard asked with a small chuckle before placing little Andy into the bassinet beside Penny's bed. "So, where's my other godchild?"

Penny gently lifted the pink bundle and handed the baby to Leonard. "Her name's Madison Lois. The Madison is from the movie,  _Splash_  cause I love  _Tom Hanks_. Then the Lois is from  _Lois Lane_  who is my favorite damsel in distress. Though, I'm hoping that my Maddie will be more of a superhero than the damsel."

"With Sheldon being her father, there's a bigger chance of her being a super villain than a damsel in distress."

Leonard smiled down at the little baby. She was so precious—not that Andy wasn't—and he wondered if his dream children with Penny would have been this perfect. She had a full head of blonde hair, piercing sky blue eyes that he recognized as Sheldon's and a small frown on her cherubic face. He placed his thumb on her soft cheek and sighed; this one was a pretty, blonde version of Sheldon. She had the exact same eyes that he had, the same pointy nose that wasn't as pointy, and a slightly softer shape of face than Sheldon's. The only features she got from Penny was the fine blonde hair and the full lips. She may look more like Sheldon, but he could definitely see Penny in her. She looked kind of like a mix of a blonde Missy and Penny. There was no doubt in his mind that when Maddie grew up, he and the others would have to chase after numerous guys just to get them to stay away from her.

He could imagine it now; him and the guys teaching Andy science while Sheldon berated them for doing it wrong. Playing video games with Andy, while Maddie beat them like how Penny would. All of them protecting Maddie from any possible harm she could experience, and Sheldon ensuring that everything his daughter did was safe. Matching costumes they could wear for Comic Con and Halloween. Penny getting mad at them for taking the twins out past their curfew. The four of them scaring down any boy that even dares to look at Maddie. Penny getting at Howard for teaching Andy methods on how to get girls. Andy and Maddie considering him as their favorite uncle, and Raj and Howard dying from jealousy. Sheldon acting like an overprotective hen clucking at the twins while Penny argued with him that he shouldn't be too strict. He could see so many happy moments in his head of them and the twins, that it pained him to remember that Sheldon still had yet to know about these two perfect humans.

"Did you put Sheldon down as the father?" He asked as he rocked the baby from side to side.

"I was thinking of not naming their father and just letting them have my las—"

Leonard turned to her, and sent her a pleading look. "Penny, I'm begging you, at least give Sheldon that. They deserve to know who their dad is, and Sheldon deserves to know his children."

Penny sighed, "I know, Leonard. Just hold your horses, I'm not done talking. I was originally planning on not putting Cooper down on their birth certificates, but I decided to go through with it. I haven't finished all of the paperwork, though."

The theoretical physicist grinned, "Andrew and Madison Cooper sounds better, you know. Don't worry, I'll help with the paperwork—I can be someone named Sheldon Cooper. I have his signature down pat, plus I have a fake ID saying that I am him prepared for today."

He looked down at little Maddie and found her doing something close to a smile; and he was reminded of how Sheldon looked when he was happy.

* * *

**April 2011**

* * *

The best thing about being an uncle was that he got to spoil the twins rotten.

The bad thing about being an uncle to  _Sheldon's_  children that he didn't know of, was that he had to hide everything.

In the last five months, he had been continuing his once a month visit to Nebraska to see the twins. It was hard to hide baby items and toys in their apartment, and it was even harder to sneak out from Pasadena without Sheldon tracking him down. His roommate had been constantly interrogating him on why and where he went to on his mysterious weekends. He always told him that he just had to get some time off, and lied that he went to visit a city he never been to before; like Murrieta and Ojai. He wasn't sure if Sheldon sensed that he was lying, but he might have since he kept on looking for a souvenir of some sort. Sometimes, he'd get him something form a comic book store that was far away from Stuart's and lied that it was something he got from a comic book store in one of those cities, and Sheldon was contented with it.

He kept up to date with the twins via email from Penny, and her Facebook posts. After Penny left, she removed (and blocked) all of them from all of her social networking sites, but after they saw each other again in August, she added him back. He loved seeing what the twins were up to, and seeing how they much they grew while he was gone. He also loved buying random infant things for them, and seeing the happy looks on their faces when he visited them. Those two infants held the softest parts in his heart, and it was safe to say that he was doing all of this for them and not for Penny. He still loved Penny, but now, it had changed into the familial love instead of the romantic one that he held on for so long. The moment that he saw Sheldon in the twins, was the time that he finally realized that he had moved on from Penny.

He had finally come to terms with accepting the fact that his relationship with Penny had finally reached it's inevitable end. It sometimes made him sad, but he was happier that they managed to stay close. Now, all he cared about was the wellbeing of those two babies that he loved more than his actual nieces and nephews. He loved being in their lives and strongly wished that Sheldon could be, too. Sheldon was missing out on the first moments of his children's life, and he felt guilty of it. Penny still insisted that he not tell Sheldon about the twins. She said that she still wasn't ready to have Sheldon enter their lives, and she was afraid that he would reject them. Something about how Sheldon would merely consider them as nuisance, and that he would doubt that the twins were his.

He found the latter practically impossible as the twins looked a lot like him, and because they didn't really know how Sheldon would react. A part of him told him that Penny was right; that Sheldon wouldn't believe her and would pretend as if he didn't know about them. It was possible, since Sheldon was such a selfish and arrogant person, but another part of him said that they might be wrong. That Sheldon might not act as violently as they imagined him to act and would actually be happy that he was a father. Sheldon was also kind of mysterious in the case of his reactions; one second he'd be acting childish, then on the next he'd be a serious adult that had no room for any silliness. It was confusing to try to guess what his actual reaction would be and was hard to keep track of it. As long as Penny said not to, he wasn't going to.

Speaking of Penny, about a month ago she received a call from her agent telling her that a famous director was interested in casting her as the lead role in his new show. At first, both of them thought it was a scam—Penny even thought that it was for porn—but then the director personally called for Penny to fly back to California to meet him and they realized that it was real. After a week, Penny flew to California to meet the director to discuss the show. It was a dramedy called  _Halfway There_  that was about this girl who dies and is given a second chance to live as long as she fixes a couple of mistakes that gone wrong. Both Penny and her manager thought that it was a good deal, and Penny signed with the show. A few weeks later, Penny, the twins and her sister moved to California so that she could shoot the show. So far, the pilot was extremely well received and the network ordered a full season of the show. Some even said that the show was very promising, and would most likely rack up awards if the writers played their cards right.

Today, he was going to meet up with Penny and the twins since he had some free time with Sheldon hanging out with Amy. He and Penny agreed to meet at lunchtime, and he was walking towards Penny's table when someone roughly grabbed him by the arm and pulled him back.

It was Raj.

"Dude, what the hell are you doing here?" The astrophysicist curiously asked, still gripping onto his arm. "We were supposed to have lunch when you suddenly cancelled. I tried to ignore it, but I've been so curious on why you've been disappearing once a month that I stalked you here."

Leonard jerked his arm away and hid the bag full of toys behind his back. "Why would you stalk me? I'm not doing anything wrong!"

Raj snickered, glancing over his shoulder. "Cause it interests me why you're hiding a bag from  _Babies R' Us_  behind your back."

"Actually, those toys are for me." Leonard turned and found Penny standing near them carrying both of the twins. "Hey Raj, long time no see."

In an instant, Raj discarded his confident facade and started sobbing uncontrollably. He moved closer to Leonard and whispered, "it's Penny! With children! And one of the babies looks just like Sheldon!" He wiped his tears on his sleeve and approached Penny, releasing a happy squeak as Maddie turned to look at him.

"I'm glad to see you, too, Raj," Penny gave him a bright smile and handed Maddie, "this is Maddie, and this is Andy. Judging by your reaction, I think you already know who their daddy is."

The astrophysicist nodded, lifting Maddie and grinning up at her.

"Raj said that Maddie looks just like Sheldon," Leonard said, calling on a waiter to get Raj a beer; he had no intentions of becoming Raj's interpreter. They took a seat at the table and waited for the beer to arrive.

"You look even more stunning as a mother," Raj commented once he took a sip of beer, placing the infant on his lap. "There's something about you that's so radiant, and I am seriously mad that none of you ever thought of calling me; their future favorite uncle!"

Leonard turned to Raj and scoffed, "you, their favorite?  _I'm_  their favorite uncle!"

"If you think you're spoiling them rotten, then think again!" Raj lifted Maddie up to level with her blue eyes, "hey there! I'm your Uncle Raj, and I'm gonna spoil you rotten!" The baby happily gurgled in response, placing a tiny hand on Raj's face, "i told you! I'm her favorite already! So, Penny, what are you doing back here in California? Staying for good, I hope."

Penny placed Andy in the stroller and scrolled down the menu. "Well, I got the lead role in this new show that's going to air in the fall."

Raj tore his gaze away from the blonde Sheldon and looked up at Penny with wide eyes. "No way?! Are you talking about this Halfway There that I keep on hearing about?"

"Yup! I'm playing the role of Jane, the lead character," Penny chirped, calling on a waiter to get her order. "Taping starts in August, but we've already shot the pilot. I moved here a month ago with the twins and my sister. I'm sorry I haven't told any of you, but I was unsure of how you'd react."

Raj waved a hand dismissively and bounced the baby on his lap. "I'm not mad, but I am upset that you didn't tell me about those two angels! Or that you and Sheldon had a thing—wait, does Sheldon even know?!"

Penny shook her head, "no, he doesn't know. If he knew, you'd probably know by now."

"But he should know! I'm carrying his mini me right now!" Raj raised his eyebrows as he turned Maddie to face him. "If you know Sheldon, it takes one look at this one to have no doubt in your mind that she's his daughter. She's just a prettier version of him thanks to her pretty mommy!"

"That's what I've been telling her for months, now," Leonard added with a small groan. "Maybe, you can talk some sense in Penny—go ahead and try."

"I just don't want to tell him yet, okay?" Penny sighed, waving a hand at a waiter that passed. "I'm not ready to tell him and I don't think he will be, either. I don't want to ruin his life…" Leonard saw a frightened expression flash across Penny's face and it made him curious of why Penny really didn't want to tell Sheldon. That question had been bothering him since the first time that he saw Penny again, and he doubt that he'd ever know the answer. "But, I will tell him someday—I promise."

Leonard watched as Raj slowly nodded in understanding and pulled his phone out. "Will it be okay to tell Howard and Bernadette?"

"Well, not really, but I—"

Raj held up his phone, abruptly cutting Penny off. "Too late! Already texted them, and they're coming here! This is gonna be fun, I love catching up with people I haven't seen in a while!"

Penny raised an eyebrow and glanced over at Leonard, "next time, don't let people follow you."

Leonard shrugged with a small chuckle; wondering if it was wrong of him to allow Raj (and Howard and Bernadette) to know, but not Sheldon.

* * *

**July 2012**

* * *

It had been nearly two years since he had flown to Nebraska to meet Penny, again, and it was safe to say that the past two years had been the best.

He, along with the others, were enjoying all the time they were able to spent with Penny and the twins. Since the fateful day that Raj stalked him after work, Howard and Bernadette had gotten back in touch with Penny, as well. They often had lunches together, and whenever Penny was busy for press conferences for her show, they volunteered to babysit for her. The twins were growing with each day, and were absorbing knowledge like a sponge. Raj taught them about the stars, Howard showed them his inventions, Bernadette showed them how to take care of yeast and how to stay clean—though, with them being Sheldon's children, they doubted that they'd be able to endure being dirty—and he tried to teach them as much physics as he could. They all doubted that they understood anything, but he knew that their early lessons would be a big help in the future.

Raj took the liberty of filming every action that the twins made, important or not. It was kind of fortunate that the twins did most of the film worthy—which, in Raj's eyes, were everything they did—things while they were around. Raj got everything from the first time they ever attempted to walk (Maddie tried it first, and he was sure that Andy was extremely jealous) to when they actually learned to walk, to their first tries at talking (it was also Maddie who did it first) and when they spoke their first word at an early age of eleven months. For once, it was Andy who said the first ground shattering, tear jerking word that made Raj run for the camera and coax Andy to say it again, while Maddie mustered up everything she had to say a word even more complex than the one her twin said. It was friendly competition, and Raj caught all of it on tape, for future reference. Even with all that,  _he_  was still their favorite uncle, much to both Raj and Howard's dismay.

When Halfway There started filming four months after Raj followed him, their lunches with Penny lessened and turned into weekend dates while their babysitting jobs increased. Due to Penny's growing popularity, she found it hard to find a daycare that wouldn't exploit the twins. She was even finding it hard to go out with the twins without paparazzi swarming them, which led her to ask them to babysit when they could. She had gotten a trustable babysitter, but the sitter was often unavailable when needed. It was Mrs. Wolowitz (of all people) who babysat on the more hectic days where neither of them could watch the twins. When Penny had to go to the studio on weekends, it was them who took over, and it was fun for all of them. They loved spending time with the twins, and every moment of it was worth the strikes that they got from Sheldon for not sticking to their original plans. They often told Sheldon that they were going to to meet with Penny, and he instead would spend his time with Amy.

It's not like they didn't  _try_  to get Sheldon to go with them. They did that  _a lot_ , even if they knew that Penny would go all junior rodeo on them if they succeeded with their plan. During the days that they weren't with the twins—which was getting more and more often with the studio making a makeshift daycare for them—they would tell Sheldon about what their plans were and would try to interest him in joining. Sheldon would always berate them for even bringing up the idea of meeting with the 'corn fed shoe shopping traitorous blonde' that was Penny. Raj even flat out asked him to come with them, regardless of the fact that Penny specifically asked them  _not_  to tell Sheldon. It was practically suicide, but their conscience was eating them alive at the fact that  _they_  knew and spent time with the mini Sheldons, while their progenitor had never even heard them! It was causing them to get paranoid of what Sheldon's actual reaction would be, and how he'd react when he finds out that  _he_ —specifically—knew about them for years, now.

Before, when he thought about it; Sheldon only missed a few months in their lives. Now, he missed nearly two years of progress that spanned from the moment they were born to their first steps, first word and their first birthday. He was missing  _everything_  in their lives, and that thought alone was one big guilt trip on him. How would he continue being their favorite uncle—he would never allow Raj nor Howard to get that coveted title that he loved so much—if he didn't do anything for them to meet their father in person, instead of the phony letters from Sheldon and fabricated voice mails they made by manipulating into saying the words they wanted him to say? Even the twins must be tired of only hearing about their father via stories, pictures, videos, fake letters and planned monologues. While Sheldon was already getting suspicious at them asking him to roleplay fanfiction they made that actually was a message to the twins that they intelligently hid in the dialogue.

For their first birthday, they got Sheldon to say a sweet—and totally robotic—message that was; "Andy, Maddie, happy birthday. I'm sorry I haven't been around, and that I couldnt attend your birthday party, but I've been very busy with my work. But do not worry, as I'll be visiting you soon. I love both of you very much."

That entire message was actually the manipulated version of a monologue Raj wrote that they said was a poorly made  _Avengers_  fanfiction scene they whipped up that actually had no connection to the franchise. It went as; "The name of the  _S.H.I.E.L.D._  agent who betrayed you was  **Andy**  Coppers, and the one kidnapped was identified under the pseudonym of  **Maddie**. The victim was taken during the suspect's  **birthday party**  while they were singing  **happy birthday**." Then the next dialogue was a  _Game of Thrones_ one with Sheldon playing  _Jon Snow_  talking to  _Tyrion_. " **I'm sorry I haven't been around**  much,  **but I've been**  watching from the top of the wall to check for any intruders. Sam must be  **very busy with**  the sparring you ordered him to undergo.  **But do not worry** ,  **as my work**  is not done yet, and  **I'll be visiting you soon**.  **Both**   _Sansa_  and  _Arya_  are about be married to the ones they  **love**. It bothers me  **very much**  that they are young, but to even get advice from you is honorable. They are very impressed with  **you** and  **of**  everything you've done so far."

Of course, Sheldon condescendingly reprimanded them for making such horrible dialogue, but they had to do it. In the end, Howard was able to cut and rearrange all of the clips to sound like an actual heartfelt (which sounded a bit like  _Steven Hawking_ ) message from a father to his children. They played it at the intimate party at Penny's condo that consisted of them and Penny's family, as the Halfway There staff threw a surprise party during one of the shoots. Andy and Maddie were both very happy to finally hear their infamous father's voice that it got Leonard thinking if it really was right to abide by Penny's plea to not tell Sheldon about it. It's not like Penny didn't talk about Sheldon to the twins—she talked about him  _a lot_. Their bed time stories consisted of nostalgia ridden memories of Sheldon that Penny had, and the three of them never stopped telling them about their genius father's crazy antics. The blonde never hid the identity of their father to them, which was why he found it so confusing that she  _still_  didn't want Sheldon to know.

Like there was something… she wasn't telling him about Sheldon.

It was upsetting, really, because when the twins started to understand more, they started looking for Sheldon. Together with their newfound skill of learning to talk, they kept asking where he was; why he wasn't in pictures, why he wasn't around and why he never visited them. Neither he nor Raj and Howard ever answered their questions clearly, and merely told them that Sheldon was working abroad. He wasn't sure what Penny's explanation was, but it might have worked, since the twins didn't seem as sad as he expected. That, and the fact that they made letters and pretended that it was from Sheldon to read to the twins. Plus the birthday message they fabricated. Ever since then, they tried making messages like that for the twins—so, that they wouldn't question Sheldon's absence too much. Which actually worked, as the twins now simply assumed that their 'daddy' was somewhere in Europe, trying to prove String Theory. And with each month that passed, he was getting more and more guilty of the crime of not telling Sheldon, who had every right in the world, to know about his children.

Because sometimes, someone had to make a big step before change happens. Plus, you'll never know until you try—even if it's practically two years too late.

Leonard took a sip of his iced tea, tearing his mind off his thoughts and concentrating on the blonde talking in front of him.

"We're going to be shooting in France first, then we're going back here." Penny stated as the waiter placed their orders in front of them. "It's kind of a hassle, if you think about it."

"Wouldn't it be easier if you shot here in California, first, then to France than vice versa?" He asked as Penny sliced thin strips of chicken before placing it on the twins' plate. They were currently having lunch at one of the restaurants that Penny liked to eat at. With Penny leaving before the show started taping, the director decided to tape the first few episodes in July then pick up where they left off when Penny returns. "It kind of sounds impractical to do it that way."

"It really is," the blonde chuckled, returning to her grilled salmon. "I'm not sure what our director plans on achieving with that kind of schedule—but, I don't mind. It's going to be shot in France, plus the paycheck I'm gonna be getting will allow me to finally have enough to buy that house Mr. Fleming's selling that I'm planning on buying."

Leonard grinned; two years ago, Penny barely had enough to get by with the money she made as a waitress at the Cheesecake Factory. Now, with all the money she made from her show which was now syndicated worldwide, the two films she completed and the film she was about to shoot, she apparently had enough to buy a—most likely posh, as her director was very famous and successful—house. Two years had definitely changed Penny, and was extremely kind to her. She was no longer the struggling-to-get-by aspiring waitress she used to be, and was now one of the most buzzed about celebrities out there. Even with her growing fame, she was still the bubbly woman he fell in love with; the only thing that changed, was that he no longer loved her romantically. "That's great news. I'm sure the twins are sick of running around your apartment. Which reminds me, are you bringing the twins with you when you go to France?"

"No. I've seen our schedule, and it's pretty hectic. It'll be nearly impossible to keep an eye on them and work at the same time. My free time is going to be spent on martial arts and drifting classes. I even doubt that I'll have time to look around." Penny sighed, glancing at Maddie who had mashed potato all over her mouth and leaned over to wipe it off. Leonard found it endearing that the Sheldon mini me was as messy as her mother, instead of being a neat freak like her father. "I'm going to leave them with my parents back in Nebraska, cause the last babysitter I got stole some of my things and sold it on eBay. I'm scared to find my house ransacked and exploited on a website."

Something in Leonard's mind shifted when he heard where Penny was leaving the twins, and an inevitable thing happened.

"Why don't you leave the twins with me?"

"What?" Penny turned to him with confusion on her face. "Are you serious?"

Leonard nodded, "Penny, I know you don't want Sheldon to know—but, the twins are turning two years old in a couple of months, and they'll soon be aware of everything. They're already wondering about him, and he deserves to know about the twins. It's been too long, and my conscience will kill me if I don't do anything to tell him. It's unfair to him, you know."

The look Penny had on her face was practically unreadable; it was either a look of disagreement, or of uncertainty. She looked like she was really thinking about what he said, and he crossed his fingers that she would go with it. If he didn't do anything about it, now, two years would turn into five, that would turn into ten, that would turn into fifteen—then, then next thing they knew, it would be too late for them to ever build a proper relationship. He didn't want the twins to grow up without a father, and they had pretended long enough that it was time to give Sheldon a chance. They really wouldn't know if they didn't try, and experiments were the foundation of proving theories. He was an experimental physicist; his job was to conduct experiments. They would never get an actual answer until they did something about it.

Sheldon had to meet his children.

Sheldon  _was_  going to meet his children.

"Fine," Penny calmly stated, wiping some barbecue sauce that smeared Andy's face. "But on one condition; that Sheldon finds out by himself."

"Penny, he  _needs_  to know—"

The blonde held a hand up and frowned, "you and I both know that I have a bigger chance of winning a Grammy than Sheldon accepting my children with open arms." Leonard wanted to disagree, but couldn't. "I know it was wrong of me to not tell him from the start, but I have my reasons. You don't know how scared I was when I first learned that I was pregnant, and I knew that Sheldon wouldn't believe me if I told him. Which was why I asked you not to tell him—but, when the twins started getting curious, I became guilty for not letting them meet their father. You don't know how many times I wished that everything would be easy, and Sheldon would just accept everything. I've never hidden the truth about Sheldon to the twins, and I don't want their first time meeting their father to be a bad one. I don't want to mess up our lives by possibly allowing the twins to know that Sheldon is unwilling to be a part of their lives."

This time, Penny's expression changed from uncertainty to a melancholic one that made his stomach drop and his heart hurt. "I don't want to ruin his life, Leonard."

"There's a fifty percent chance that he'll react favorably," Leonard said, reassuringly. "We'll never know unless we try, and I'm sure that it will barely take a second for Sheldon to realize that the twins are his. Maddie's like the pretty version, of Sheldon!"

Andy lifted his gaze from his plate and turned to the conversing adults. "Talk abaht daddy?"

Leonard grinned, "yes! While your mommy is away, you're going to stay with me and your daddy."

Maddie gasped, turning to her twin then to Penny. "Mommy, dis tue? Stay wid daddy?"

Penny sent her twins an unsure grin that they probably didn't understand. "Yes, you're finally going to meet your daddy." The twins started cheering, and Leonard saw Penny's smile drop slightly. "But, there's one problem. Your daddy can't remember you."

"What?" Leonard incredulously asked, furrowing his eyebrows at the blonde.

Penny glared at him before turning back to the clearly ecstatic twins. "He can't remember any of you, so you can't call him daddy, yet, okay? But, I'm sure that he'll remember you soon enough."

The twins looked crestfallen, and Leonard cursed himself for only doing this, now.

"Why daddy no know Andy Maddie?" Andy sadly inquired, his blue eyes full of innocence. "No wub Andy Maddie?"

"Daddy say daddy wub Maddie Andy!" Maddie cried, frowning in confusion. "Why no 'membah?"

"Because he's so busy with work, that he forgot?" Leonard lamely added, hoping that the twins don't press on further. They were just like Sheldon with the way the pried for information. They weren't going to stop until they got the answers they wanted. He didn't want to lie to them, but as long as Penny gave Sheldon a chance he would take it. Even if it meant lying to the twins that Sheldon had a random lapse of some sort that was probably impossible due to his eidetic memory. "But don't worry, he'll remember you, and this will be like a game of guess the animal! Your daddy loves the two of you very much, you know."

Andy and Maddie grinned, then turned to each other to converse about their father.

Penny placed a hand on her forehead, causing Leonard to grow even more suspicious about her reasons of not telling Sheldon. "You're really going to let them meet Sheldon?"

"I'm still not a hundred percent positive that this will end well, but I've already told the twins. I can't change my mind, now." She closed her eyes for a moment, thinking about something trivial before continuing. "The twins have been asking about him nonstop, and it hurts me when they get sad when they realize that he's nor here. I know it's my fault, but my conscience is eating me, too. I really can't just drop the proverbial bomb on Sheldon—especially one  _this_  big. He doesn't like change, and I have a nagging feeling that this will not end well."

Leonard furrowed his eyebrows; did Penny really have that little faith in Sheldon being a father? Well, sure he had some growing up to do, but he wouldn't be a bad father! He would probably be extremely overly protective of them, making sure that they didn't bring in any germs from the playground, or that they don't chew on their toys. Not that the twins did that—they already had a nearly full set of baby teeth—and they were very advanced babies. They could already talk well (though, not so well as they still couldn't pronounce their Rs or Ls) they could walk, they were partially potty trained, and they were really smart! Sheldon would be impressed with how smart his 'progeny' were! Well, he wouldn't, and would probably get mad at Penny for not including them in their lives, causing them to not be as smart as they could have been.

It's not like Sheldon would throw his the twins out the street once he realizes that he's their father. There was a small chance of that happening, but he was staying positive with the possibility of Sheldon not reacting negatively. Like being shocked and outraged at him for not telling him that he had fathered children. Then Sheldon would probably act awkwardly around the twins when he finds out the truth, and when he reveals that Sheldon 'remembered' them again, they would start calling him daddy and they would be a happy family! Then once Penny comes back, they would be a happy little dysfunctional family that would have to work out a lot of issues before actually becoming happy. Like Sheldon's hatred for Penny, and Penny being a famous celebrity with paparazzo chasing her everywhere while asking if Sheldon was the mystery father of the twins.

The idea of Sheldon, Penny and the twins becoming a family didn't even bother him. Instead, he found satisfaction at the thought that he was the reason why their impossible family had a chance of becoming real.

He really was going to be the twins' favorite uncle.

Those two infants held the softest spot in his heart—and like what he always said to himself—two years ago, he would have done all of this because of his love for Penny. Now, it was for the twins who just wanted to meet their father. Call him crazy, but he might be the happiest of them all when Sheldon finally acknowledges the twins as his children. Because that would be the moment that Sheldon finally grew up, and all his hard work would be done. His conscience would finally set him free from the guilt of not telling Sheldon, and he could finally move on with Penny. As long as Penny and his roommate didn't see eye to eye, he would still be attached to Penny; trying to find a way to keep her and the twins happy. He was just the proxy while Sheldon was supposedly in Switzerland working on his String Theory research and had momentarily gotten amnesia. His job would soon be ending, and he knew it.

"All he needs is a chance, Penny. And I have every faith in Sheldon that he  _will_  find out by himself. What will you do if he finds out and doesn't act as negatively as you think?"

"Then, we'll talk something out, or something."

"What if he doesn't find out before you come back from France?"

Something told Leonard that this plan of his would fail with the way Penny's eyes hardened, and he hoped that he wasn't wrong in take this chance to finally correct the wrongs.

"Then, we'll live on like we always have," Penny said stoically, her eyes focusing on her lunch. "Doing this is a risk—both to me and my children—but I'm going to give him a chance because they need to know who he is. How he acts around them will tell me if he'll be a good father, cause that's what the twins need. But, if he doesn't find out on his own, then we'll just pretend that this whole thing didn't happen." The sternness in her voice always made Leonard wince when she spoke again. "And you're  _not_  going to tell him, do you understand? You're going to let him find out by himself."

 _This is a risk_ , Leonard thought,  _but risks are supposed to be taken._

"He's going to do it," Leonard confidently said, "I'm sure he will."

Penny gave him a sad smile that got him thinking about the truth. "I do, too."

* * *

 **Present date:**  October 2012

* * *

"… so Penny agreed to leave the twins with us, and you know the rest."

Sheldon frowned down at his feet as he took in everything that Leonard said.

Leonard knew about the twins since Penny was twenty-three months pregnant, and yet he never even bothered to tell him. Looking back at it, now, that was around the same time he went on a vacation and came back angry with him for no absolute reason… Which means that the reason of his sudden outburst was due to him finding out about the twins! Well, then that means that he had to retract those waiting strikes that he had mentally awarded him after he got all mad without a single reason. So, that's why he kept on barking at him about Penny; because he knew  _all along_. Maybe, he should return those strikes he had just retracted. That would be a kind punishment for hiding the truth from him. In the ancient times, he would have had Leonard beheaded. In  _Game of Thrones_  he would have had his head on a spike.

Along with Leonard, Howard, Raj and Bernadette all knew before  _he_  knew about his children. If they were there at the twins' first birthday, then that meant that they met with Penny again, a little after Leonard said that she moved back to California. Maybe, they deserved to get strikes to. Or a beheading. None of them ever so much as hinted that Penny had kids, and the only hint Raj ever made was that he and Penny were friends. That was it. Though, they did invited him out to join them numerous times, before, but he didn't know that they were meeting with his children! All he knew was that they were going out to meet with their traitorous blonde former neighbor that had an outstanding number of impending strikes. If he had known that  _his_  progeny was there, then he would have gone with! How would he find out if they never even told him that Penny had children?!

Then there was what Leonard said about him having faked his identification for the twins' birth certificates! That was fraud, and Leonard should be arrested for that! Then, there was the one where he stole his unopened paychecks and gave it to Penny! Well, he couldn't get too mad about both of those, as they were for his progeny. If Leonard didn't give Penny his money during her pregnancy, his children might have lacked nutrients or something. They might not have had a comfortable life if Leonard didn't do it, as Penny only got her supposedly high paying job as the lead actress in her supposedly number one show one year ago. And it wasn't like he needed the money—he had a lot of money, especially with all of the raises he got from the successful progress of his researches. Plural. He was such a valuable asset to the university that he could already smell tenure.

He didn't mind the part with Leonard committing identity theft to ensure that the twins had his last name. Though, he didn't understand why he had to go through such lengths, he guessed that it was to make sure that Penny wouldn't change it or something. He really couldn't hate his roommate for it, as he did it with good intentions. Because of what he did, the twins were Coopers, and he wouldn't have found out that they were his kids at the meet and greet if they weren't. And if Leonard didn't do that, the only way he would be able to give the twins his name was to adopt them. He found the idea of adopting the twins to be too tedious given the fact that he really  _was_  their father. He no longer doubted it, and it seemed like Penny didn't, either.

He couldn't understand why Penny didn't want to tell him, yet never hid his identity to the twins. Leonard said that Penny talked about him all the time about the twins, and that they were often looking for him. They even made him read those horrible fanfiction that was actually a well hidden monologue that they made as a message for the twins' first birthday. His children had been longing for him from the start, and all they could tell them was that he was supposedly in Switzerland working on String Theory, and had a strange case of amnesia. Which was preposterous as he had an eidetic memory, and he had not suffered any hits to the head that would cause a loss of memory. His children were fed with poorly thought of lies, and if only he was there from the start, they might not have been foolish enough to believe it.

Leonard had planned this entire scenario from the start—he was the one who suggested that Penny leave the twins with them. He even got Howard to lie about his mother possibly overfeeding the twins if they stayed with her, even though Mrs. Wolowitz had babysat the twins long before he met them just so that he would take care of the twins on his own. Which, he was actually thankful for, as if he didn't, he would never have had a chance to learn the truth. Penny had no intentions of ever telling him, and if he didn't find out about the truth earlier, Penny would never tell him. She had no plans of involving him in the twins' lives. If he hadn't discovered the truth earlier, in a week, Penny would return to take the twins and he would still be oblivious that the twins were his children. He would have lost the chance to be a part of  _his_  children's life, and he couldn't help but be mad at Penny for being so inconsiderate. The twins were fifty percent of him, and Penny had no right to say that he wasn't allowed to be involved! Well, she might, but she has to have a good enough reason as to why she did so.

There was a reason why Penny didn't want him to be in the twins' lives, and even Leonard didn't know about it. But, he will—in less than a week's time.

"Why did you have a fake ID proclaiming that you were me, and how is it that you managed to imitate my signature?" He asked, once he had gathered all of his thoughts.

"We all made one for fun, really, but Howard was the one who thought of it. It was one of his connections who made it, so I'm not sure if it's even fake." Leonard answered, shrugging slightly. "In all the years that you made me sign our annual revision of the roommate agreement, I've managed to memorize your signature—it's not really hard to do you know. I even memorized your social security number, though I'm sure that you know mine, too."

"Was that how the twins became Coopers without my knowledge? You pretending to be me when Penny filled up their birth certificates?"

Leonard nodded, a sheepish look in his face. "Yes. I was desperate to ensure that the twins at least got to be Coopers, cause if I didn't, my guilt would eat me alive. Don't tell me you're going to get me arrested for fraud or som—"

Sheldon pursed his lips while shaking his head, stopping Leonard from continuing. "Though, I am unhappy with you stealing my money, committing identity theft by pretending to be me, and not telling me about the truth when you should have," he started, glancing at the look of relief on his roommate's face. "I am grateful that you took good care of my progeny, and that you convinced Penny to leave the twins with us. Also for lying that you were me just to ensure that my progeny got my last name. Had you not done that, I would have never heard Maddie saying that their last name was Cooper, and I would never have learned the truth. If I discovered the truth any minute longer than when I had, I would have taken too much time. And Penny would never introduce the twins as my progeny."

"You're my best friend, and it was wrong for me to never have told you. Even if Penny said so, I still should have informed you about the truth." Leonard gave him a small smile, "I was mad at you at first, you know, but I had to think about the twins. If I stayed mad at you and Penny, they might never have had a chance to meet you. I knew that you wouldn't intentionally sleep with Penny to hurt me, and neither would she. You wouldn't, right?"

Sheldon stared at his roommate, "why would I even engage in coitus, Leonard? My night with Penny was an alcohol induced haze that I vaguely remember, and do not wish to remember. If it was up to me, Andy and Maddie would be fertilized in a clinic via test tubes and petri dishes, and would be born by a surrogate that I specifically chose. They also wouldn't have the names that they have, now." He scrunched up his face in distaste, "Andrew and Madison? What kind of names are those?"

"Why? I think they're great names. What would you name them if Penny allowed you to?"

"Well, for Andy there's; Isaac, Albert, James T. Kirk, Luke, Anakin, Charles, Logan, Barry, Wally, Bruce, Peter, Tony, Johnny, Reed, Pietro, Victor, Hank, Steve, and handful of other superhero names." Sheldon mused, tapping a finger on his chin in thought. "Then for Maddie, there's; Marie, Leia, Padme Amidala, Lt. Uhara, Dinah, Selina, Susan, Raven, Cassandra, Natasha, Pepper, Jean, Gwen, Mary Jane, and more superhero names. It seems I have more ideas for male progenies than female ones. Interesting."

"Actually, their names are Madison Lois, and Andrew Charles." Sheldon raised an eyebrow at him. "Andrew is from  _Toy Story_ , and Penny chose Charles cause she knew that  _Professor X_  was your favorite  _X-Men_. Madison is from some movie she liked, then the Lois, is from  _Lois Lane_  who is supposedly Penny's favorite damsel in distress. She went DC and Marvel for you."

Sheldon hummed in what Leonard suspected was of delight. "I am happy about the Charles, but I would be happier if his name  _was_  Charles. I've long guessed that he was named Andy for the character in  _Toy Story_ with his collection of merchandise from the movie. But I am not pleased with Maddie's name as I neither know of what movie you didn't name, nor is  _Lois Lane_  my favorite damsel in distress. Though, I doubt that I can do anything about that, now."

Leonard chuckled, smiling at Sheldon. "What are you planning on doing, now? Are you going to tell the twins that you 'remember' them? Are you going to tell Penny that you know?"

What  _was_  he going to do, now?

He woke up today as a single, successful, respected physicist and now he was still the same physicist, except he was now a father of twins. He had no idea of how to be a father, and he doubted that what he did in the past two months was even close to what a father was supposed to be. Now, that he knew that he was the twins' father, he felt as if he was a stranger to them. Everything he knew about them had been thrown out the window, and was replaced with new questions and problems that he couldn't answer. It was confusing and troubling at the same time, but he had made up his mind.

"I'm unsure of what I'm supposed to do, but I  _will_  tell the twins that I know of their existence. I doubt that I'd appreciate them calling me Sheldon, now, that I know of my real role in their lives. But, I won't tell them about it, yet." Sheldon stood, moving to his desk. "And as for Penny, she'll know of me knowing the truth when she comes back."

"That's in about two or three days," Leonard stated, heading over to his desk and grabbing something from a drawer.

"I know," Sheldon glanced over his shoulder, a stern look on his face. "She has a lot of explaining to do."

Leonard pulled out a black white photo and handed it to Sheldon. "This was the sonogram of the twins at twenty months that Penny showed me when I flew out to Nebraska. I asked Penny if I could keep it, and now I'm giving it to you. It's two years too late, but I hope you appreciate it."

Sheldon took the picture and resisted looking at it. "Leonard?"

"Yeah, buddy?"

"I may not be as angry as I was earlier," Sheldon said looking up at his roommate, "but I still have not forgiven you. Or any of you, for that matter. We will deal with this on a later date when my mind has recovered from all of this madness. I'm not happy with  _any_  of you right now."

Leonard sighed, "I know. I hope you know that I'm sorry for taking this long. I would've done it sooner, but, I guess I wasn't smart enough to do the right thing, then. I'll talk to you later." He gave Sheldon a small nod before heading into his room.

Sheldon stared down at the picture of when his progeny were yet to be born, and felt the familiar clench of his heart as he placed it on his desk. He was having the same feeling he had whenever he looked at the photo shoot pictures, and it made him resist the urge to cry. He had missed so much in the twins' lives, and he decided that from now on, he wasn't going to miss anything else.

He was going to be a part of the twins' lives whether Penny liked it or not—and there was nothing anyone could do to stop him once his mind was set.


	12. Prolonged Encounters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything changes with Penny's return.

**The future;**  thirteen years later.

* * *

"I think I'm going to vomit."

"What? You're going to be fine; you've won three junior division titles straight, now. There's no doubt in my amazing mind that you're going to win." Andy gave his fidgeting twin sister a reassuring smile as she started pacing in front of him. "And you look great in all that white you're wearing! It kinda makes you look like a ghost, but don't fret—ghosts don't have blonde hair. Or blue eyes. And when they do, there's blood oozing out of it."

Maddie shot her overly energetic brother a look, "you're seriously not helping. If I lose the game, I am going to  _kill_ you!"

Andy raised his hands up in defense, taking a step away from Maddie. "Hey, no need for violence! I'm just trying to make you calm down, you know." His twin sister was always like this before her matches; she was extremely nervous (nearly vomiting) and always expected the worst. Yet, after every game that she thought she would lose, she won without even allowing her competitor a single point to their name. She was undefeated for three years straight now, and was known as one of—if not,  _the_ —the greatest tennis players of their generation. She was that great. Though Maddie excelled in several sports—soccer, swimming, baseball, basketball, golf, martial arts—it was tennis that she loved the most. Not only was she an athletic prodigy, but she was also famous for her angelic face that caused him to make a barricade around her.

That, and her contribution to science by helping Aunt Bernadette find a cure to a deer virus that had crossed the species barrier and could infect humans. It was what made the scientific community recognize her as one of the most valuable minds of their time. Her IQ of 185 was no laughing matter—except when compared to  _his_  of 186; but, Maddie didn't like to bring that up, or else she would threaten to tell their mom about the working laser he built that accidentally made a hole in their garage. Maddie was actually close to what most people considered as perfect; naturally blonde, blue eyed, athletic, smart, tall and not to mention, beautiful. The only problem with his almost fictional twin sister was that, not only was she terrifyingly disorganized, she was also insouciant, unfriendly, a bit of a loner and had the shortest temper he had ever experienced to feel the wrath of.

She also had zero motor skills, and was unbearably tone deaf—but that was a taboo topic in their household. But really, his twin was actually a really awesome person, and he just loved messing with her. She was just too serious that he took it as his job to make her lighten up a bit as her personal body guard and jester. Maddie was always either studying or assessing scientific problems, and it was great that she found sports to be her past time. Now, ever since their mom enrolled them in a sports clinic when they were five, Maddie added sports into her routine. It was now; study, science and sports. The three S's. She was so great at everything that it shocked everyone to know that she—for some unknown reason—had a difficult time learning how to ride a bike, and that she was tone deaf. Well, she was great at playing the piano, but she couldn't carry a tune to save her life. Which, she probably got from their mom.

He placed a hand in his chin in thought, then snapped his fingers. "I got it! Why don't I serenade you? You're neither my beloved nor am I standing under a window, but you're my sister, so that might mean something. I'll even go Disney for you cause I know how much you love them!"

"That's not going to help at a—"

_"Let's get down to business, to defeat the Huns! Did they send me daughters, when I asked for sons?"_

"—you're making it worse—"

_"Be a man! You must be swift as a coursing river! Be a man! With all the force of a great typhoon! Be a man! With all the strength of the raging fire! Mysterious as the dark side of the moon!"_

Maddie hissed, lightly smacking his arm, "cut it out! It really isn't helping, and  _Mulan_  isn't my favorite! It's  _Beauty and the Beast_  or  _Frozen_. You claim to be smarter than me, yet you can't even remember that!"

"You love all of the Disney princesses!" Andy grumbled, rubbing a hand on the spot that his sister's man hands had assaulted. "And I'm not claiming that I'm smarter than you—my GPA speaks for itself. Besides, me singing is much better than you singing!" He grinned as his twin threw him a glare at the mention of her pitch deafness that she inherited from their mother. In contrast to Maddie's extreme athleticism, he was musically inclined. He could play nine different instruments solely by ear; the piano, the violin, the cello, the clarinet, the saxophone, the harp, the guitar, the drums, and the trumpet. He also sang very well, and starred in various musicals that their school had; unlike Maddie, whose singing was akin to the screeching sound that a microphone made when it was dropped. It was that bad.  _"Well, you only need the light when it's burning low. You only miss the sun when it starts to snow. Only know you love her when you let her go. Only know you've been high, when you're feeling low. Only hate the road when you're missing home—"_

"Could you not sing a song from thirteen years ago? It's 2025 and there are nearly a billion songs in the world, now." Maddie snarked, bouncing the tennis ball on the ground. "If you're going to sing, at least make it a good one."

Andy frowned at her, then crossed his arms. "I'll just sing the song that mom used to sing as a lullaby when we were younger! Don't tell mom, but this is going to be a better version." The tennis champion groaned as her virtuoso brother cleared his throat and started to sing.  _"But of all these friends and lovers, there is no one compares with you. And these memories lose their meaning, when I think of love as something new. Though, I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them; in my life, I love you more."_

"That was horrible," she said, shaking her head. "My tennis racket's strings are snapping because of your voice!"

Andy scoffed, "yeah right! I've starred in ten musicals at school and am about to star as—the blonde version—of  _Link Larkin_  in this year's remake of  _Hairspray!_  A lot of people would pay good money to hear me sing, yet I'm letting you hear it for free. You should be happy! I shouldn't even give you the family discount, yet, I'm doing it for free."

Maddie stared at her twin brother in disbelief and sighed, "I'm not even going to justify that with a response. When did you even get so obnoxiously arrogant?"

"Only cause I want to cheer you up," Andy placed his hand on the top of his sister's head, "you're going to win and become champion—for the fourth time—and are going to place that trophy in the living room where mom puts all of our awards! Like next to mom's two Oscars, four personal Emmys and my class valedictorian medal that shines so much brighter than your salutatorian one." Although, Maddie was considered smart, he was said to be even smarter. Like his twin, he was also involved in the discovery of the cure to the deer virus and they both shared the credit for it even though it was  _he_  who successfully made the antidote for it.

Another taboo subject in their house was the fact that he graduated with highest honors, while she only got salutatorian in high school. The fact that they graduated at  _fourteen_  slightly softened the blow to Maddie, but every time she saw the medal, the unreasonable accusations aimed at him would start. His twin had always been a sore loser, and she was lucky that he was very laid back when it came to her temper. It also wasn't his fault that the same ivy league universities wanted him as well—they hadn't even submitted their applications when the letter from Harvard came—and it was a good thing that their mom didn't want to let them go off to college until they were at least sixteen, or else Maddie would kill him if he even thought of going to whatever prestigious school she was thinking of going to.

Which really wasn't much of a problem (he hoped his mom wasn't listening) because he really didn't feel like going to college, yet. They still had a whole year before they could do anything, and while Maddie joined (and won) various tournaments; he entered the world of entertainment, as he was already getting offers to act way before he even thought of acting. Acting was really just a hobby when he was a kid—mainly Aunt Bailey and Uncle Gregg filming them while he and Maddie reenacted the scenes from Halfway There—but, he never really thought of doing it as a profession like their mom did. Like his twin, he loved science, but he found out that he loved acting, too. There was just something so amazing about watching their mom act that it eventually caught his interest when they were six years old. It wasn't a big role—it was just a scene in their mom's new movie, and he was going to steal her bag. That was it; but he loved it.

Unfortunately, their mom didn't want him to quit school, so he only did roles that were shot in California. He never had  _any_  troubles with school, and that made their mom allow him to continue acting. He mostly did movies, because that was what their mom said he could. But, when they graduated last year, the offers suddenly started coming, and since he really wasn't doing anything, he accepted some. His first actual job was the lead in a Disney (he and Maddie would always love Disney) teen movie about a famous singer from New York that got lost in California, and met a girl that hated his guts. Then, he had just wrapped up filming of the teen version of  _Hairspray_  that casted him as a blonde  _Link Larkin_ , and was set to premiere in a month. He also had offers to play  _Alex_  in the  _A Clockwork Orange_  remake (their mom wasn't going to say yes) and to play a teen version of the  _Barry Allen Flash_ —not  _Wally West_ —in the new  _Justice League_  movie.

He also got an offer to play  _Quicksilver_  in the new  _X-Men_  reboot, but there was a catch; Maddie had to play  _Scarlet Witch_. He really wanted to get that role—which was funny, as their mom played and reprised  _Black Canary_  in several DC films—the only problem was, Maddie had no interest whatsoever in acting. She was a great actress and even became an extra in three of their mom's films with him, but she wanted to pursue a career in either medicine or professional tennis. Or do both at the same time, if that was even remotely possible. If he heard her correctly, she wanted to be neurosurgeon, and was already looking into going to Harvard— _if_  their mom would be able to comprehend that her princess would be on the other side of the country. While he—he really had no plans of going to college, yet, and he knew that he was going to be under serious fire because of it. Instead of thinking of whether he should go to Harvard, Yale, Stanford, or Oxford, he was thinking of what roles he'd accept, and if he'd take the lead in the Disney show that was offered to him.

He was  _so_  going to get killed for this.

"When I graduate as summa cum laude, I swear I will shove all of your obnoxiousness down your throat, and make you choke from it." Maddie hissed, roughly prying her twin's hand off the top of her head. She always hated it when her twin stepped into her comfort zone. If only she could successfully build the optimizer machine she was drafting in her head—then, she'd be able to make adjustments to her annoying brother's persona. "Then I'm going to sneak up into your room and perform brain surgery on you to remove all of the undesirable traits that make you so annoying."

Andy chuckled, grinning widely down at his sister. "Don't forget to locate the part of my brain that contains my skill at cleaning and find a way to transfer it to you. It might help you out a bit."

"You are really going to taste what junior rodeo feels like—"

"Okay, cut it out! No need to kill your brother, Maddie! He meant well."

Maddie huffed—Andy thanked the cosmic forces that saved him from Maddie killing him—and stepped back, bouncing the tennis ball on the ground to calm herself down. "I'm sorry, Uncle Raj. It was just that Andy was getting on my nerves!"

"When do I ever  _not_  get on your nerves, blister?"

Raj winced, quickly placing himself in between the two tall blondes before there was any bloodshed. "Like I said, no need for fighting. Andy's just trying to cheer you up, Maddie. Right, Leonard?"

Leonard nodded, holding up a paper bag that made Maddie grin. "Your Uncle Raj is right. You're nervous, but that isn't anything that some ice cream can't handle!" He handed a cup of ice cream to each of the twins. "It's your favorites! Cookies and cream and classic chocolate. So, relax, Maddie. You're going to win your fourth title in a row, and he's going to see every second of it. I know you're afraid that he might not come, but he will."

"That's what I keep telling her!" Andy complained, neatly opening the ice cream cover and throwing it in the recycling bin. "I even sang for her, but she wouldn't listen. Three songs. All for free, and not even a single thank you."

Maddie ignored her twin then looked down at Leonard with uncertainty in her sky blue eyes. "Are you sure, Uncle Leonard?" The two tenured physicists nodded frantically and watched as Maddie regained her composure. "I guess you're right. I'm just going to eat this, then I'll be back." She turned to her brother who already finished half of his ice cream, "hey, let's get back to the stands and watch the game. It's good to see my potential rival for next year, and it looks like an interesting one." Andy nonchalantly shrugged, waving at the two scientists and trotting after his twin.

Raj grinned as he watched Andy and Maddie make their way to the other side of the court. "Do you think Sheldon's going to come?" Raj asked, watching the twins make their way to the stands before glancing at his friend and colleague for twenty five years, now. It was shocking how much time had flown by.

Leonard raised an eyebrow at his fellow tenure, and glanced at the entrance. There was still ten minutes left before the championship game started.

"I know he will."

* * *

 **The present;**  October 2012.

* * *

"—I just do not understand why everyone must suffer just because some kid's parents can come to the play. We are not like dominoes where when one falls, everyone must, too."

"Well, it was the parents who personally asked smiling Brenda to move the date. It's not the kid's fault that his parents are busy."

"Leonard, the play was moved to November, when it was supposed to be tomorrow. Didn't you see how upset the twins were when smiling Brenda told them that the play would be postponed? I highly doubt that getting Howard and Raj to take them to Scryer's to get some ice cream will be enough to cheer them up."

Leonard hummed in thought; the twins did seem pretty upset when smiling Brenda announced that the play would be moved to November. Apparently, one of the kids in the twins' class' parents were both busy on the day of the play and wouldn't be able to make an attendance, and the parents that it be moved to when their schedule was clear. A lot of parent complained at why it had to be moved to suit those parents' schedule, but smiling Brenda simply asked them to understand the parents. She said something about how they were just two parents who wanted to be there for their kid, but unfortunately, was stuck with work. A few parents didn't mind, but most were infuriated—like Sheldon. He started a protest of sone kind about how it was unfair to the rest of those who could attend that it be moved just because two parents couldn't. He even gained supporters because of the rant.

He glanced at his tall roommate as he shifted two boxes under his arms. "And you think push and racers for both of them will?" Sheldon demanded that they make a detour to  _Toys R' Us_  before going home without so much as an explanation to why. When they got there, Sheldon started searching for something and even stared at a big playground set before moving on to the infant section. He kept on trying to ask why they were there—not that he didn't know that it was something for the twins, he just wanted to hear it straight from Sheldon's mouth—but his quirky roommate ignored him and continued his searching. About twenty minutes later (thank goodness the twins took forever to eat ice cream) they saw a kid riding one of those  _Little Tikes_  push and ride racers. It came in a bright red, yellow and blue one, and a pastel pink, yellow and blue ones. Sheldon bought one of each.

"My progeny are upset," Sheldon stated knowingly, holding the door open for Leonard. "They are my progeny, not my friend, thus the only social protocol I know for dealing with someone who is upset does not apply to them. I highly doubt that they'd appreciate a hot beverage to make up for the postponement of their much awaited play, and I would have bought them an  _iPad 2_  each—but you said that that wasn't appropriate. Nor was a  _Wii U_. Or a  _PSVita_. Or a  _3DS_."

"They're two years old—they're not going to have fun with a  _3DS_ , or an  _iPad_ , and much less a  _PSVita!_  And we don't even have room in the apartment for an actual table, how are the twins going to play with these?"

"It's for when we're at the park, not here in the apartment. If they used it here, it would be considered as bumper cars with all the dead ends they'll run into."

"Is buying toys you're attempt at cheering them up?" Leonard asked once they reached the second floor.

"When I was a kid, my Meemaw would buy me a new comic book—or one I didn't have—whenever I was upset. It cheered me up greatly, and I don't see why I shouldn't try that approach with the twins." Sheldon replied, furrowing his eyebrows slightly as he thought. "Then, when I was a bit older, my father's bottled blonde girlfriend tried to buy my affection with action figures. It would've worked if the  _Boba Fett_  action figure she got me was green instead of the grayish-blue color that it was."

"Are you trying to buy their affection with toys?" Leonard asked, slightly shocked once he connected what Sheldon was doing to what he experienced. "Cause really, the twins already—"

"I'm not buying their affection with toys, Leonard," Sheldon interjected, shooting him a glare. "I'm simply trying to cheer them up. I already know of how the twins see me—and this is no ploy whatsoever."

"Why don't you just tell them that you 'remember' them, already?" Leonard blurted out, causing Sheldon to stop and turn to face him. "It would make them happier if they knew that you knew. Don't you want to see how they'd react? Or hear them stop calling you  _Sedon_ —and be called daddy, or something?" He watched as his roommate frowned at his words.

It had been four days since Sheldon found out about the truth that he was the twins' father, and yet he still hadn't told the twins that he knew. Sheldon kept saying that he wasn't going to tell them until Penny came back from France, because he wanted to talk to her before he did anything. Raj said that Sheldon was still in the denial stage, where he was still looking for answers before he actually accepted the situation he was in. Which in this case; was Sheldon being a father. With the way Sheldon found out, Raj theorized that he was in a state of shock, and it was only Penny who would be able to answer the questions that bothered him, as she was the one who was involved. Discovering the truth was too much for Sheldon, and they all knew that—honestly speaking—he still wasn't ready to be a father.

But, it wasn't like a lot had changed between him and the twins after the found out. The only change they noticed was that Sheldon was  _so much_  more kinder to the twins than he ever was. He no longer had any negative comments about them, and even interacted with them more than he did before. Now, he was the one who fed them, gave them a bath, put them to sleep and practically took care of them. The twins didn't notice, but all of them did. Sheldon wasn't the kind of father (still not acknowledged) that spoke in baby talk to the twins, or coddled them as they thought he would. He was just Sheldon, except with children. He acted the same way around the rest of them, but he was a bit more softer with the twins. He listened to what they said, played along with their games and even watched the so called 'inane children shows that do nothing for a child' with them when he could.

Well, to anyone who didn't know Sheldon, they'd think that he was just someone who was fond of the twins. However, they  _knew_  Sheldon, and everything he was doing was so out of character that Raj even cried that he was slowly changing. Within two months—specifically, one month and twenty-four days—Sheldon drastically changed from someone who absolutely  _loathed_  the idea of children that weren't made clinically to an inexperienced father who was desperately trying to be a good dad was. Kind of. He really was trying, and they knew that he was struggling to do it. If they were to give him a grade on how much he had changed since the first day that the twins came, they'd give him an A+ for effort and amazing progress. None of them (even Leonard) had expected that Sheldon would embrace his new role as quickly as he actually did.

"There is a proper time in doing such, and it is not now," Sheldon said, huffing before continuing up to the fourth floor. "Though, I would like for them to already know the truth, there is still a lot that I must discuss with their mother. I'll tell them soon enough."

Leonard grumbled as Sheldon stood in front of their apartment door, reaching into his pocket to take out his key. "Well, soon is not soon enough, Sheldon—and you know it! I hesitated in telling you, and I've regretted it ever since. Think about how you felt four days ago when you realized that I could have told you but never did. That's how they feel, too."

Sheldon raised an eyebrow and turned to face him, "are you questioning my decisions, Leonard?"

"Maybe, I am. But I'm only doing it because I want to help you, Sheldon!"

The theoretical physicist snorted, unlocking the door then turning to Leonard. "Two things, Leonard; one, I did not ask for your help nor your opinion on this matter. This concerns me and me  _alone_. You've spent the last four days smothering your 'help' in my face and I am getting tired of it. Second, I do not need you help with this. At all. I have my own reasons as to why I'm doing this and you have no right to weasel yourself into it."

"I'd be happy to help you out with whatever your problem is—if you ask."

Sheldon snapped his head towards the direction Leonard was staring and where the voice came from and found Penny smiling up at them from the middle of the couch.

"Penny, you're back!" Leonard exclaimed, dropping the boxes he held and rushing over to where the blonde was. "Why didn't you tell me that you were back? I could have picked you up from the airport or something! Raj is even planning a welcome back party for you!"

The blonde actress smiled, "well, filming wrapped up ahead of schedule, so the director decided that we fly out to Japan earlier than planned. We finished everything within a day, and now all that's left for the movie is the ending which will be shot here. I got back about two days ago—but, I didn't tell you cause I was preoccupied with something that I had to fix. I was planning on surprising you guys yesterday, but I was called on to the set for a briefing." Her grin got wider as she turned to see Sheldon frozen at the doorway then made her way towards him. "Sheldon! You know, I didn't realize that I missed you until I saw you," with one big step she crossed the doorway and wrapped him up in a tight hug. "The last time we saw each other, we were too busy fighting that I didn't even get to hug you. I'm glad that we're friends, again."

Sheldon blinked as Penny continued on hugging him. He felt  _extremely_  uncomfortable, and resisted the strong urge to push their former neighbor off of him. He had not expected this to happen so soon—he was prepared to meet Penny again in a day or so, not today. Regardless of what he said to Leonard, he really hadn't thought of a way to approach this new shift in his life. He may have told his roommate that he had a certain way of doing things, he really did not have a single clue of how he would handle it. He didn't know how he would tell Penny and the twins that he knew of the truth. That was why he was so reluctant to tell the twins that he 'remembered' them; he was unsure of how to do it. No matter how hard he thought about it, he couldn't come up with a right way of doing it.

He felt Penny release him from the vice grip to step back, her bright green eyes meeting his. It was making him feel guilty of something he didn't do, and he wished that she would just direct her attention elsewhere. "What? Are you so happy to see me that you're practically speechless?" Penny grinned, lightly poking a finger on his chest. "Haven't seen you this quiet since you congratulated me for winning the Emmy. Let me guess, you're trying to blow my mind telekinetically for breaking into your apartment?"

Sheldon stared down his nose at her, a small frown forming on his face. "No, I am not risking the cleanliness of my apartment just because of that." He pried the finger off that was still in contact with his shirt and brought her hand away from him. "How exactly did you get into our apartment?"

Penny pouted at him, "aww, guess you're not  _that_ happy to see me, huh?" He raised an eyebrow and the blonde giggled, pulling out something from the inside her jacket. It was a necklace with a key on it. "I used the spare key you gave me. I've never returned it, and I'm glad I didn't." She held up the key for another moment before placing it back under her jacket. She titler her head to the side and stared at the stiff man in front of her, "why are you suddenly so quiet? Two months ago, you were all snark and bite that I'm actually shocked that you're so quiet. Are you okay?"

The theoretical physicist opened his mouth to speak but Leonard beat him to it. "He's just surprised to see you, Penny. It had been two years since you acted nicely in front of each other, and I'm not sure if he's happy or confused."

"Oh," Penny softly said, "yeah, I guess it really has been that long. Sorry, if I annoyed you, I just really missed you. You don't really miss someone until you find yourself eating Thai food on a Monday in France." He heard Leonard chuckle from the kitchen and watched as Penny grabbed a black duffel bag that he didn't notice was sitting on his spot. "But! I got you everything you asked me to buy." She pulled out a plastic bag then four small boxes and handed it to Sheldon who silently took it. "I got you that  _Gyakutan Kenji 2_  game, those magazines filled with comics—something jump—and those build your own robot things. I got something from everyone, actually, but those toys are for you!" She gestured towards the bag then raised an eyebrow once she saw the two boxes that had been forgotten on the floor.

"What's this?" She crouched down, gently picking up the box. "Are these for the twins?"

Sensing that Leonard would take any given opportunity to inform Penny that he knew the truth, Sheldon spoke. "Leonard bought them in compensation for their play being moved to next month. They were very upset, and he decided to buy it in an effort to cheer them up." He saw Leonard sending him a look of confusion from the corner of his eye and quickly sent him a look that told him to go along.

"Yeah, I thought that it might cheer them up," Leonard said, going along with Sheldon's lie while picking up the aforementioned toys. "I'm just going to put this inm my room. Please, don't kill each other." Ignoring Sheldon's glare and Penny's confused look, Leonard retreated back into his room.

Sheldon moved inside the apartment and closed the door while Penny stood and made her way towards the couch. "So, Sheldon, how have you been? I haven't heard much from you since the meet and greet, and I'd love to catch up." He placed the things Penny bought him on his desk and took a seat on his chair, maintaining a distance between him and the actress to avoid any unnecessary hugs. "How's work? I heard from Raj that you're about to prove String Theory, and that you're the rockstar of science with all the progress you're making on your research. Congratulations on your contribution on finding that new super heavy element, Dr. Rockstar."

The smile she was sending him was irking him to no end. It was as if she was just waiting for him to casually answer all of her questions that would eventually lead to him blurting out the truth. It was so natural and familiar that it seemed as if they were transported back to a time where he wasn't hiding the fact that he knew about the secret she hid from him. His conscience—aka Leonard—was winning on making him want to tell her, but he still had self control. He would tell her that he knew that he was the twins' father on a later date; once he'd prepared all of the questions he would ask her. Because he knew that this wasn't the day—like what  _Syrio Fore_ _l_  of  _Game of Thrones_  said;  _not today_. "What Raj said is true," he said, looking away from the smiling Brenda-esque grin that Penny was sending him. "I'm almost done with my research—just a few finishing touches, as they say—then, I'm going to publish it. I can already smell the Nobel from here."

Penny's smile faltered as if he had just said something wrong. "Are you okay? why are you acting all—distant?" He watched her furrow her eyebrows in concern and he leaned back against his chair, just in case she decides to go near him. "Are you still mad at me? If you're, then I'm sorry. I want us to start fresh and be friends again, Sheldon. It kinda sucked to not hear your condescension for two years."

If only she knew why he was acting 'distant' to her. If only she had a feeling that he knew—cause she didn't. Penny was so sure that he wouldn't find out, that she was already trying to get on his good side before she took his progeny and pretended that he never met them. Well, she didn't want him to know in the first place, so, he knew that she'd whisk the twins away the moment that she thinks that he didn't realize the truth. Unfortunately for her, the twins slipped (metaphorically) and that led to him discovering the secret that every single one of them skillfully hid from him.

For some reason, he wasn't even mad at the blonde. Okay, he was  _kind of_  mad, but not ultra mad. He was more… unsure of how to react than angry. He was still plagued by a hundred different questions that he had yet to answer, and it was the reason why he was so troubled. He really didn't know what he was going to do with the new change in his life. It was funny how he was  _so_  close to solving the biggest mystery in the world, yet he couldn't decide on when he would tell Penny that he knew that he was the twins' father. He didn't even know how he was supposed to tell his family that he had children! Or how he didn't know until now! The only thing he did—so far—was adding the twins as beneficiaries in his insurance and declaring them as his tax dependents. That was practically the biggest step in his being father that he did, and he had no clue where to go from there.

"Those issues are in the past, Penny," he said as he turned to face his laptop, effectively hiding the way his face started ticking. "I have metaphorically forgotten about that, and I suggest that you do, too. We are in a new version of our friendship, and to maintain that, we must exonerate each other's faults and start anew." Lies, but he had to go along. "Therefore, I am reducing your strikes from nineteen to two. Congratulations."

"That's great news!" Penny chirped from the couch, "I'm happy that we're friends, again, Moon pie. You really don't know how much I missed you."

Sheldon snorted mentally; if she really felt any sort of longing for their friendship, she would have told him the truth. "Penny, please remember that  _only_  my Meemaw is allowed to call me that." He swiveled his chair around to face her, and found Penny giving him some sort of wistful smile that he could not understand. "I may have restored our friendship, but it does not mean that you can just call me any appellation that you want that you are not allowed to use. I am only my Meemaw's Moon pie, and hers alone." He watched her let out a soft laugh that made him raise his eyebrows at her response. "I know—I just wanted to mess around with ya."

Before he could reply, the door flew open, and Raj, Howard and the twins appeared.

"Mommy?!" The twins exclaimed in shock as they stared at the blonde sitting on the couch.

Penny tore her attention away from him and smiled at her (their) children, "hi, twins. Mommy's back." Sheldon watched closely as Andy and Maddie blinked, their eyebrows slightly furrowing before sobbing uncontrollably as they ran over to Penny. They never had such a reaction when they first saw him—and thinking about it, now—they should have greeted him like this when they first met. The only thing they did was poke him in the arm and talk about him behind his back. Not the emotional meeting he deserved since they had never seen him in person before. How infuriating; they preferred Penny over him (though, it was logical) he would have to do something about that. There was no way he was going to be their second choice when he hadn't even had a chance to prove himself.

"Mommy," Andy started, sniffling as he hugged his mother's knee. "Andy miss you! Andy miss you, wots!"

Maddie nodded as she wiped her tears on the sleeve of her tan colored jacket. "Maddie miss you wots, too! Maddie miss mommy's kisses, and mommy's hugs and mommy's stowies! No go, again, peas?"

Penny fought back a few tears as she lifted both of the twins and sat them on her lap, wrapping her arms around them. "You're talking so well, now! I can't believe it's been two whole months since I last saw the two of you—I missed you two so much."

Howard sniffed while Raj sniffled beside him, "I can't believe Penny's back! Bernie's gonna be so happy, and so will the twins!"

Sheldon frowned at the scene in front of him then turned back to his laptop. He was  _not_  going to be easily swayed by unnecessary emotion. Even if seeing the twins cry—even out of happiness—upset him.

* * *

There were two things that bothered Sheldon with Penny's return. One; it seemed that everyone was much closer to her than they were two years ago, excluding him, of course. And two; motherhood had completely changed Penny's outlook in life.

It was safe to say that Penny was now more… refined, and seemed less and less like the blonde he knew. She no longer talked of nonsense like shoe shopping, and gossiping about people she never even met. She didn't even say 'like" as much as she used to. She now dressed so un-Penny like; a light blue cardigan over a gray v-neck shirt and jeans in compared to her former usual outfit of tank tops and skimpy shorts. She seemed like she had quit excessive drinking and partying with the way she brought herself. He didn't have definite proof, but he could tell. She also seemed strict with the twins, and herself, and stuck to a routine of some sort that dictated what they would eat and do. There was even this air of sophistication that surrounded her, that wasn't present when she still lived across from them.

As if the Penny from years ago was completely imaginary with how sophisticated she was. She was still the bubbly, overly energetic (which, Andy seemed to inherit) and engaging woman she was before, and wasn't at the same time. Unlike her old self, she didn't mooch off of them—considering the fact that the two movies she starred in the year before surpassed a hundred million in the box office—and even offered to pay for the takeout he ordered Raj and Howard to get. When she exchanged gossip with Raj, she actually knew the 'celebrities' she was talking about instead of just basing her opinions on pure assumptions. She now had a successful career instead of waitressing at the Cheesecake Factory, and (apparently) had a safe, well maintained car that did not have a blinking check engine light.

"Wow, it's getting pretty late," Penny said as she glanced at her wristwatch, "I think it's time that we should go home."

Maddie sharply turned her head towards her mother, abandoning the tea session she started with her  _Winnie the Pooh_  doll and the  _Totoro_  doll—the Japanese counterpart to  _Winnie the Pooh_ —that her mother had brought back for her. "No go home. Maddie wanna stay wid Sedon and Uncah Wenad!"

Andy nodded in agreement, looking up from the  _Pikachu_ doll that he got. "Andy and Maddie wike da apaht-meht! It fun hewe—why not Mommy stay, too?"

"Dat good idea!" Maddie exclaimed, standing up and toddling over to Leonard at the armchair. "Uncah Wenad! Mommy stay hewe, too, peas?"

Leonard reached down and patted the top of her head, "of course, your mother can stay here! Penny, you're always welco—"

"No, no, no," Sheldon hissed, turning his chair to frown at his roommate. "Leonard, do you even hear yourself? We do not have house guests—the twins are an exception—and frankly, if I didn't value your companionship, I would have kicked you out by now." He saw Leonard open his mouth and he cut him off, again, "also, our earthquake supplies; we have a two man, two toddler, two day kit. So, if there's an earthquake, and the  _five_  of us are trapped here, we could be out of food by tomorrow afternoon. Do the math, Leonard."

Penny stifled a laugh, causing his frown to deepen. "Oh sweetie, I promise that if we run out of food, I won't eat you. Or any of you. Besides, an earthquake didn't happen the first time I stayed over here, and I doubt that it would. Don't worry about me resorting to cannibalism, okay?"

Sheldon mentally snorted, like he'd allow her to eat him or the twins. If they did have to sacrifice someone in the scenario of an earthquake, the only logical person to eat would be Leonard. Eating the twins was completely out of the question, and he knew that they wouldn't be happy if either he or Penny were subjected to cannibalism. This entire conversation subtly reminded him of when Penny decided to sleep over about six years ago, due to her friend Chrissy (the whore of Omaha) soiling her apartment with the now soon-to-be married Howard Wolowitz. They had all been disgusted by the pair's activities that Penny decided to sleepover. It was also the same day that she somehow found a way to defeat him in HALO.

How nostalgic.

"Sedon, mommy seepovah, too, peas?"

With an eyebrow raised, he looked down and found Andy staring up at him with hopeful light blue eyes. He hated it when either of the twins did that. Before, when he didn't have a single clue of their real identity, he still had strength to resist their pleading faces. Now, it barely took one look form them and he wouldn't be able to say no. He didn't understand why gave in so quickly, but he knee that he would rather see the 'peas' face—as Raj called it—rather than them crying. He had never liked seeing anyone cry, and he most especially did not want to see the twins cry. It was upsetting and made him want to blow up someone's head for causing his progeny to get distressed. "Your mother will do whatever she wants, whether I stop her or not."

Andy stared at him for a moment—probably comprehending what he said—then glanced over his shoulder to yell, "seepovah wid mommy!"

"Mommy seepovah and have tea pah-tee!"

"No, mommy pay wid Andy fuhst!"

"No! Mommy pay wid Maddie fuhst!"

"I actually want to take a nap, if you don't mind."

"You can take my bed—that's where the twins are sleeping. I think the three of you can fit, as long as you don't mind."

"It's alright, Leonard, I'm sure the twins don't mind sleeping beside me. Don't you twins?"

Sheldon rolled his eyes and ignored the chaos, turning back to his laptop to work on his paper. He would get nothing out of the conversation that the others were having—paying attention to it would only distract him from achieving what he had to achieve. Today, his job was not to look after the twins' every move, ensuring that they would not get hurt in any way—which he would still be doing, just not at that exact moment since Mademoiselle Coddle was there—but to continue his temporarily abandoned work on the multiple worlds theory. He had been so focused on his nearly concluded (and was about to be passed to Gablehauser and the scientific community for testing) paper that would disprove Loop Quantum Gravity, that he had momentarily forgotten about the other ground breaking research he was doing.

With his now published paper about the technique for creating a new heavy element actually helping a group of Chinese scientists discover the new super heavy element, he had enough time to follow it up with a second (and third) breakthrough. The second being his paper that would disprove Loop Quantum Gravity, and the third from his work on the multiple worlds theory. He had worked on all of them nonstop for two years, and he wasn't going to allow anything to distract him from it. He was finally close to actually achieving his lifelong dream of getting the Nobel, and although he got a bit off track with his constant worrying about how his life would change with the twins being his progeny, Penny's return would allow him to get back on track.

With Penny back, she would be taking the twins back with her.

… Which actually didn't sound as pleasant as it seemed, two months ago. Ever since he discovered about their true identity, he had often wondered on how everything would work out after he tells Penny that he knew of the truth. He thought of the different scenarios on how his life would change with them entering it. The twins would surely live with Penny, and that meant that he'd have to go out of his way to spend time with them. They'd also have to agree on a schedule on with whom the twins would stay with. He would probably get them on the weekends and the holidays, as he doubt that they'd live with him. He would also have talk to Penny on his financial contributions for their education, regardless of the fact that Penny was now rich. However, none of the aforementioned might not happen if Penny has a—

"Sheldon, buddy. Are you okay?"

He quickly snapped out of his troubled thoughts and noticed that the entire apartment was now dark. He glanced at his word processor that was filled with all of the points he planned on including then behind him to see Leonard sitting up on the couch. "Yes, Leonard? What is your problem?"

Leonard rubbed the side of his head, squinting at the bright light that the laptop emitted. "Uh, the glow of your laptop and the sound of the keyboard clicks are keeping me awake."

Sheldon blinked at him, then saw at the corner of his laptop's screen that it was forty minutes past midnight. He didn't even notice that he had been typing nonstop for two hours, now. It was actually kind of impressive how he was able to type everything he had to add even though he was lost in his thoughts. It was past his bedtime, and he had yet to take a bath! This whole surprise fatherhood was really taking a toll on him, and he had to do something before it completely disrupted his routine. Not sticking to it was bad for him, and was already showing it's effects with the way he often lost track of time without even noticing. As if his mind had gone on into autopilot. "I apologize for the noise, I was just about to finish up for the night." He saved the file and shut his laptop off. "Where are Penny and the twins?"

"They went to sleep hours, ago," answered Leonard with a small yawn. "You're the only one who's still awake." The theoretical physicist nodded, standing from his chair and looking around. There was no sign of the toys he bought for the twins. Leonard might have placed it in the closet. He gave him a tight smile in the darkness, and he heard Leonard plop back down on the couch. "I see. Well, I shall be retiring, now. Thank you for reminding me of my sleeping schedule."

"You should really tell Penny that you know." Leonard said once he had reached the hall, causing him to stop. "The twins were going on and on about you, awhile ago. Then, they asked Penny why you still didn't remember them. I told them that it was because you were just busy on your work, and Penny agreed. You're lucky that that the twins are too young to realize that we were lying. If you don't, Penny might not let you in the twins' lives even if I force her to."

"I know, Leonard," Sheldon mumbled, walking away from the living room and towards his room. Of course he was going to tell them! It was just that, he still couldn't find the right time to tell them. It wasn't like he was enjoying everything that was happening; he just needed some time to think things through. He had already made up his mind that he would be in their lives, and he wasn't going back at that. His tiny roommate really had to stop nagging and actually mind his own business for once. Though, he appreciated everything he did from Penny's pregnancy to now, he did not need his help in this. He had his own way of doing things, and he could handle the situation on his own. He was an adult and was now partially responsible for two lives; he had to learn to stand on his own feet to show Penny that she was wrong in not allowing him to get involved.

He grumbled in annoyance before stopping in front of Leonard's door and mentally debating on whether or not he should take a peek inside. He always checked up on the twins before he went to sleep, just to ensure that they were sticking to the carefully planned sleeping schedule he made for them. Maddie was unbearable when cranky, and Andy staying up all night meant that he would be asleep for majority of the day. Both were unrecommended, which was why he took it upon himself to at least take a peek to see if there were any problems. But, he found it somewhat inappropriate with Penny also being in the room. There was no ill intention whatsoever—he just wanted to check on the twins. That was it. But, something was telling him that it wasn't the greatest of ideas, and that he should just continue on to his room.

Ignoring it, he opened the door as quietly as he could, and poked his head into the room. He looked around the lampshade lit room—checking if there was any chance that someone had gotten in from Leonard's window—before glancing down at the bed in the middle of the room. He saw Penny sitting upright against the headboard, sound asleep, with both of the twins's heads resting against her arms. Penny must have been telling them a bedtime story when the twins fell asleep, which seemed shortly before the oldest blonde followed after them. He could tell by the way she was softly snoring that she had been asleep for at least an hour, now. She didn't even bother to fix their places before drifting off—how annoying. If only he wanted to, he would fix their bothersome arrangement. It was most definitely an uncomfortable position, but as they all seemed okay with it, he would let it go.

As he reached out to turn off the lamp beside Leonard's bed, he noticed Maddie turning slightly and opening an eye to look at him. "Daddy, night night?"

Sheldon's eyes widened at the toddler's slip of tongue—her sleepiness might have caused her to accidentally call him daddy—and he couldn't help but feel a sharp pang of guilt for hesitating in telling them that he knew. "Yes. I just wanted to check in and say goodnight. Goodnight."

Maddie closed her eyes and yawned, "night night, daddy."

With a sigh, he switched off the light and trudged to his room. The more he stalled, the harder it would get for him to tell them the truth.

* * *

_"Oh my god, is that Penny from Halfway There?"_

_"I think it is! She's so much prettier in person!"_

_"I had a feeling that those adorable twins were the ones I always see on tv and on the internet! Why didn't I realize it before?"_

_"Mom, listen—no, nothing happened to your grandson—Penny from Halfway There is here at the daycare!"_

_"I want to take a picture, but I'm getting so nervous! I never thought that I'd actually see her in person!"_

Sheldon frowned deeply as Penny walked in front of him and Leonard, carrying Maddie while holding Andy's hand. Their former neighbor had insisted that she 'tag along' with them when they dropped the twins off at the daycare so that she could see it for herself. He had tried convincing her not to go—as he was aware of the possible commotion her presence would cause—but, she didn't listen. Now, everyone from teacher to parent was fussing on how 'pretty' she was in person, and how they wanted to take a picture.

"I told you it was a bad idea to allow her to come along," he hissed to Leonard who was doing something on his phone. "Look at all these people—their lives are being disrupted by their need to take a picture with her! Someone might have even missed a vital appointment!"

Leonard rolled his eyes at him, "will you cut it out? It's their choice if they want to fawn over, Penny. She just wants to check the place out, Sheldon."

Sheldon huffed and felt Penny sidling up to him with a mocking smile, "Leonard's right. You gotta lighten up a bit, I just wanna see the daycare you chose." She hoisted Maddie to her hip before letting go of Andy's hand, allowing him to run off to another part of the lobby. "And so far, it's safe to say that this place is so much better than any daycare I ever checked. The twins seem to love it, too."

Maddie happily nodded, "Maddie and Andy wike it hewe! Dis pace da bestest!"

"It's the  _best_ , not the bestest," Sheldon corrected, earning a small glare from Penny. "I am merely trying to help the twins improve their speech. Had it not been for me, they would not be as advanced in their speech as they are, now. Most toddlers their age barely even speak in a full sentence. You should thank me." He raised an eyebrow at her, and wondered if he caught the innuendo he so cleverly added. She might not have, with the way she was still glaring at him, but he knew that Leonard caught it.

"Yeah, yeah, you're the best," Penny scoffed, looking around the lobby, "you've been pointing that out to everyone since the first day I met you. You haven't changed a bit, Moon pie."

"For the fifty-seventh time, Penny, only my Meemaw can call me that." She matched his frown with a cheeky grin, and he truly regretted the day that Leonard said hi to her five years ago. "Do it again, and you'll be getting a strike. "

"Mommy!" Andy energetically called, dragging a lady behind him. "Andy intoh-duce someone to you!"

Penny turned from Sheldon and faced the redhead, "and who do we have here, sweetie?"

Leonard shoved his phone into his pocket and stepped forward. "Penny, this is Brenda. She's the head personnel here, and she also sometimes teaches the twins."

The blonde extended her free out to the redhead, "hi! I've heard a lot of great things about you from my kids, and I'm glad to finally meet you in person. Please call me, Penny."

Smiling Brenda stared at Penny's hand for a second before letting out a small squeal. "I can't believe you're standing right here in front of me!" She grabbed the blonde's hand and started shaking it. "I am a  _big_  fan of your show; I loved  _Four Rules to Live By_ , my kids and I watched  _Super Secret Ninja_  about five times when it came out and my husband and I are dying to watch both  _The Truth About Life_  and  _Hindsight!_  I am really one of your biggest fans!" Penny blinked at the giddy redhead and glanced at Sheldon who was shaking his head while smiling Brenda sighed happily. "I humbly apologize for inconveniencing your busy schedule with the twins' play getting postponed—I didn't want to, but I felt bad for the parents who wanted to be there for their son. I hope you don't mind."

Penny chuckled softly, smiling at the redhead. "No, it's alright. To be honest, if it wasn't postponed, I wouldn't be able to watch it. I only got back from France two days ago, and have been busy handling something ever since. I would've hated it if I missed their play. They're really looking forward to it."

"Both Maddie and Andy are doing excellent in the play! They actually memorized all the steps weeks, ago."

Penny raised an eyebrow at Maddie who nodded, placing a hand in front of her mouth to act as a beak. "Maddie da duck, mommy! Quack, quack! Andy da sheep, but he no want. He not happy."

Andy crossed his arms, turning away in annoyance. "Andy da sheep and no want—Andy wanna be da duck, but Maddie got to be da duck. Andy not happy, but Andy can do nothing!"

Sheldon hummed, turning to Leonard as Penny and smiling Brenda continued walked towards the hall leading to the Sunshine Room to drop off the twins. "I have never noticed how well the twins' speech have improved. They might be able to speak coherently after a few more lessons. My progeny are truly remarkable."

"Well, they're your children," Leonard mumbled with a shrug, "it's not surprising to know that they're freakishly smart. And would you please stop calling them your 'progeny?' It makes it sound as if you built them in a lab with intentions of making them takeover the government and rule the world as you always wanted. Can't you just call them your kids or something? They'll still be able to become benign overlords that will guide humanity to a better tomorrow if you call them your kids."

"Don't be silly, Leonard," Sheldon chastised with a knowing look, "both Andy and Maddie will become intellectually superior benign overlords that will guide humanity to a brighter tomorrow regardless of whether or not I refer to them as my progeny. I am only using it as the word  _children_  still doesn't sound well, in my opinion." He glanced over his shoulder to see if Penny had returned from the Sunshine room—various parents were blocking the entrance—then faced his roommate. "And will you stop meddling into my affairs? You're acting as if everything I do is wrong—please, enlighten me on how I'm supposed to do it right."

"I'm not trying to chastise you, Sheldon—I just want to help." Leonard explained with a roll of his eyes, "I don't want you to screw anything up with Penny. We've come this far, and I'm not going to let my efforts go in vain. Nor, will I let the twins lose their chance of getting you into their lives. So, you better do your best."

The theoretical physicist clucked his tongue, noticing that Penny had finally emerged from the hall and was taking pictures with the other parents. "This is not a game, nor a challenge. I will do this  _my way_ , and the only thing you need to do is support me. Your efforts will not be taken in vain, Leonard."

"Sorry, I took too long," Penny said once she reached them, finally done with all of the pictures. "A lot of the parents wanted a picture with me, and Mr. Fleming always tells us to never ignore a fan." She smoothed down her pale linen coat and grinned up at the grumpy Sheldon. "Don't worry, I just wanted to check this place out. It's actually pretty nice, and I promise to never ruin your schedule, again. Though, I have another favor to ask of you."

"—oh what fresh hell is this—"

Leonard lightly elbowed Sheldon, forcing him to shut up. "Of course! Anything for you, Penny. What is it?"

"Well," the blonde drawled as they exited the center, shoving her hands in her pockets. "I was wondering if you guys—and hopefully, Howard and Raj—could lend me about an hour of your time after work? I need your opinion on something, and I'd be really happy if you could."

Sheldon shot his roommate a look, which he ignored. "Yeah, sure. We're not doing anything important today, so, there's no problem. I'm sure Howard and Raj would be happy to come. Where and what time should we meet up?" They stopped in front of their cars, and Leonard took out his car keys.

"About three thirty, or something?" Penny said, getting in her car, "just text me when you're ready to go, then I'll fetch you guys at the university. And don't worry, Sheldon, I know it's Giacomo's today—my treat." She gave Sheldon a cheeky grin before waving at them. "I'll see you then!"

Leonard waved as Penny exited the parking lot while Sheldon hissed, "must you always say yes to everything Penny says?"

"I don't!" His roommate replied, getting in the car, "this is the first time you'll ever get to hangout with Penny. This might even be the day that you tell Penny the truth."

Sheldon loudly slammed the door; if Leonard meddled one more time, he'd be awarding strikes. "Just drive us to work, Leonard, before I blow up your head."

* * *

Rajesh Ramayan Koothrappali was usually not a sentimental person (in his opinion) but, he couldn't help getting emotional when he and the others stepped outside of the university to find Penny driving a bright red Range Rover that was lightyears ahead of her old, beat up red Volkswagen that was always close to dying out on her.

It was the exact moment that he suddenly realized how much his friend's life had changed in the short span of two years. Looking at her now, there was barely a trace of the down on her luck girl that she used to be, back then. Not that fame caused her to become arrogant and egotistical like how some celebrities got—she was still the same bubbly, friendly and grounded blonde that they all knew and loved. From close-to-depressed waitress—slash—never-got-an-actual-audtition actress, to one of the most talked about celebrity out there—slash—Emmy award winning actress—slash—the actress who was rumored to star in practically all of the pre-production movies. In just two years, Penny's world had completely turned around and was getting even better with each day that passed.

He was the self appointed president of the Penny Blossom—it was Howard who suggested the name in reference to her one business venture—fan club that also included both Howard, Bernadette and Leonard. They created the fan club after they met up with Penny again and before the show started. At first, the fan club (and Facebook fan page) only had roughly ten members who were mostly them and Penny's relatives. But when Halfway There premiered, the numbers of people wanting to join doubled, then tripled then was now close to two million members—because everyone else started their own. Penny's Facebook fan page reached twenty million likes the other day, and her twitter was close to reaching ten million. It was undeniable that Penny was getting more and more famous with each day.

So, when Penny drove around the coveted Caltech neighborhood filled with multi-million dollar mansions and pulled up in front of a large electronic gate that was sandwiched in between two tall ivy covered (probably) concrete walls—he was only  _slightly_  confused.

Howard pressed the window button, making it go down and poked his head out. "Whoa, what's this place?"

Leonard squinted his eyes and adjusted his glasses. "Are we going to meet a friend of yours? Someone really, really rich must live here. Look at that fence—I can't even see anything other than the top of the trees."

Sheldon huffed from the passenger seat, glancing at Penny beside him. "If you are simply planning on wasting my time by waiting for the owner to let us in, then I ask for you to make this quick. I have other things to do."

Penny smiled, turning to them at the backseat then to Sheldon. "Actually, I don't think that the owner will mind us going inside." She lowered her window then punched a four digit code into the machine, causing it to beep and the gate to open. "Guys, welcome to my new house."

Once the gate opened, they drove through a short tree canopied lane that lead to a circular driveway with a fountain that was connected to the detached double garage. The actual house itself was a beautiful, two story stately Mediterranean styled house with several french doors and balconies that decorated both floors of the beautiful of the house. The house was surrounded by a landscaped garden that contained various dark potted plants and trees and had a stone walkway that disappeared into the side of the house.

Penny parked in front of the entrance and got out, urging them to follow. "This was actually one of Mr. Fleming's—Halfway There's director, creator, executive producer and the coolest man alive—three houses here in California." She explained as she led them through the wrought iron encased glass front door, that led to the a dramatic entryway with a sweeping marble staircase. "He found it too tedious to have three houses and decided to sell this one, since he preferred his house in Calabasas—which is seriously gorgeous."

Sheldon looked around the room, furrowing his eyebrows as he turned to the blonde. "Penny, this house appears to be a well maintained example of Pasadena's long and well respected architectural history. That being said, I wonder—when exactly was this house built?"

Penny hummed, slightly curious on why Sheldon was asking the question. "Well, this house may seem like it's old, its not. This house was designed, built and complete in 2010! Pretty cool, huh?"

"If this was you director's former home, doesn't that mean that you bought this  _with_  his old furniture? Are you not aware of the possible germs and diseases that—"

"Actually," Penny interjected raising her eyebrows at him, "I bought this unfurnished. I didn't like Mr. Fleming's taste in furniture, so we placed all of his old things in a storage. That's why I was busy these past two days, I've been looking at various furniture stores to see what I can buy for the house." Leonard did a silent 'oh' while Howard and Raj simply nodded. "The only rooms I've completely furnished are my room, the twins' room, the kitchen and part of the living room. I'm still working on everything else."

Raj leaned towards Howard who talked for him, "Raj said that if you ever need help in looking for things, he'd be happy to volunteer."

"Thanks, Raj! I actually planned on showing the house  _after_  the twins' birthday, but I thought that it would be better to move in already. The twins are already sick of the apartment I used to rent, and that's practically why I bought this house. Mr. Flaming was even awesome enough to reduce the price—big time—for me. So, now I just have to furnish everything." Sheldon snorted at her—causing Penny to tilt her head in confusion—then Penny started the tour around the beautiful (partially empty) house.

They started with the step down, formal living room where guests could be entertained then to the library which she was going to turn into her office. They passed through the loggia which spanned the whole length of the house, that had multiple sets of casement french doors that led to one the four furnished rooms; the living room. It was normal sized room with a fireplace on one side, a  _giant_  flat screen television that seemed so great to play video games with, a  _Bose_  speaker system and a gray sectional that had two lilac colored throw pillows on it. Other than a stylish modern Asian floor lamp, a wooden coffee table and a CD stack; those were the only items in the living room.

From there, they moved to the second furnished room; the expansive gourmet kitchen. It was big with white walls and American walnut floors, with white Calcatta d' Oro (Raj recognized it) marble counter tops over dark counters and top of the line, stainless steel appliances. In the middle of the kitchen was a large counter island with a set of bar stools along one side, and a wide kitchen sink on the other. There was also two seemingly custom made high chairs that matched the bar stools that sat on the third side of the square island. The kitchen was probably the most furnished among the rooms on the first floor—excluding the two bathrooms—as even the dining room was stark with only a crystal chandelier handing in the middle of the room.

"There are four bedrooms up here," Penny stated as they climbed up the wide staircase, "one being my bedroom, and two being the twins'. But, for now, I'm putting them in one bedroom—the one next to mine—and I'll eventually give them their own rooms when I grow up. There's a guesthouse outside, too, if any of you ever feel like staying over. The three of us might get a bit lonely in this giant house." She stopped in front of a set of white double doors and opened it, "and this is my room!"

Penny's bedroom was a big one—probably as big as the formal living room—with cream colored walls and light wooden flooring. There was a fireplace (practically every single room had one) on the right side of the room, where Penny placed two armchairs facing it. In the middle of the room was a large, modern styled king-sized bed with white and gray bedding, and beside it was a similar style end table that displayed pictures of her and the twins. Across the bed were two french doors that led to the balcony; between them was a table full of various pictures (Raj noticed some of them were them) then, above it was a flat screen tv and TiVo that they all presumed was for her reality shows. There was also a large, en suite bathroom with a nearly room sized walk in closet filled with clothes, dresses and—Sheldon snickered at this—rows and rows of shoes.

After the master's bedroom, they moved to the door beside it. "This is the room I've been designing for weeks, now, and it took two whole days to finish it. I literally pulled out all of the creativity I have to make this happen." With a wide grin, Penny opened the door and led them inside the twins' room.

The room was of a light, sky blue with simple white painted clouds every now and then above white oak paneling and the same wooden flooring Penny's room had. On one corner of the room was a white colored wooden tree styled bookshelf that stuck to wall that had painted birds flying off the top. Beside the tree-shelf was a white armchair and floor lamp that they all guessed were for story reading. Next to the area of the reading area was a long white board that replaced the regular paneling on the wall, and a low table filled with various markers and whiteboard erasers. At the end of the room was a one step platform that had railings on both sides that were connected to the wall. On top were two twin sized mattresses that were pushed next to the wall and were separated from each other by a french door—which led to a balcony overlooking the backyard like Penny's—that was being blocked by a low end table. There were also hanging painted cardboard ornaments above each bed; a set of planes and stars on the bed that seemed to be Andy's and a set of birds sitting on a branch and clouds on the one for Maddie.

Raj had to hand it to Penny; she definitely had great taste in furniture.

"So, what do you think?" She asked, watching as the three men looked around the twins' room. "I even consulted with an interior designer friend of Gregg's that was known for nurseries and children's room, but most of the room is based ofd my ideas."

"It's really awesome, the twins will love it!" Leonard.

"Hey, if I had a room as cool as this—add a tv and an  _Xbox_ —I'd never leave my room." Howard. "And Raj is saying that you have magnificent taste in designing."

Sheldon raised an eyebrow as he stepped out of the bathroom, turning to the blonde. "Penny, did you know that rugs are dust hazards and could possibly cause an asthma attack if not cleaned regularly?" He poked the tip of his foot on the colorful rug and frowned, "this is too thick to be able to avoid dust from gathering."

The blonde blinked, looking down at the rug then up at the physicist. "Uh, I got someone to come in and clean twice a week. I don't think it will take long before any dust that gathered will be removed."

"Those markers—did you make sure that they're  _non toxic?_  Though little, there is a chance that the twins might put those markers in their mouths. They can be easily poisoned and killed if those are not non toxic."

"They're non toxic, okay? Why the hell would I even get anything that could possibly harm my children, Sheldon?!"

"When you chose to design this room, did you ever think that that single step could possibly an accident prone area? Either of the twins can get hurt if they don't notice it. They could get a bone broken—or worse—get killed."

"My children are not stupid, Sheldon! They won't just trip out of no reason, and that platform isn't that hazardous!"

"Did you even think about how the twins could possibly get hurt by this room, Penny?" Sheldon clucked his tongue and Raj swore that Penny's eyes twitched out of anger. "It's as if you don't even care about the twins' wellbeing!"

Penny—already having had enough of the condescending physicist—marched up to Sheldon and growled. "Okay, Sheldon, I've had enough of this. Why the hell do you even care about the choices I make for this room?"

The theoretical physicist straightened his back and peered down his nose at the blonde. "Because I am concerned for  _my_  children's safety, Penny."

Holy crap on a cracker, Penny thought as she stared at Sheldon with wide eyes. Actually, that was practically the only thing that flashed in her mind as Sheldon clucked his tongue at her. "Are you surprised that I know? I must admit, it was a crafty game you set up for me, but it was also foolish to have thought that I wouldn't find out. It took a while, but I did."

"Uh, Penny," Leonard started, breaking the silence that filled the room. "We're going to get the twins—can I borrow your keys?" Penny wordlessly handed him her car keys and turned to Sheldon to continue staring at him.

Howard chuckled, "Penny might get pregnant again if we leave these two alon—ow!" Leonard grabbed Howard by the dickie and dragged him out of the room. "We'll be back in a bit! Don't kill each other."

The two remaining adults heard the other three rush out of the house and was met by another beat of silence.

Sheldon cleared his throat and folded his arms across his chest. "Did you not expect me to find out, and that you can just put the twins in my life only take them out again without even telling me?" Penny furrowed her eyebrows at him. "You seem startled; must I spell everything out for you, Penny?"

"How did you find out?" Penny managed to croak out, once her voice returned.

"Well, it was during the Steel Samurai: Warrior of Neo Olde Tokyo meet and greet," he answered, walking towards a picture of Penny and the twins that hung on the wall next to the door. "A production assistant was asking for our names and the twins kindly filled me out. After that, I went to Amy's laboratory to get a—slightly illegal—paternity test, and it turns out that I am, indeed, a father of twins. Quite the surprise, if you ask me."

Sheldon watched Penny glance down at her shoes before looking up at him with an unsure expression. He didn't expect that today would be the day that he would tell Penny of him knowing the truth. He thought that it would be sometime before the twins' birthday, or a date earlier than that. He wasn't ready for this conversation, but he had gone on to the point of no return. There really was no use in hesitating when he was the one who broke his own plan of telling Penny when she decides to take the twins out of his life. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"I—I didn't tell you because I was afraid that you wouldn't believe me and that you would think that I was just trying to mooch off of you." Penny confessed with a small sigh, "I didn't want to ruin your life, either. A little after I found out that I was pregnant, I saw that you were making a lot of progress in your research and I didn't want to get in the way of that. Then, 'soon' became five months, then turned into a year, and here we are now. I'm sorry if I didn't tell you earlier, and I'd understand if you hated me for it."

There was a sort of broken quality in her voice that made Sheldon stare at her, noticing that her lower lip was trembling as if she was refraining from crying. Some signal went off in the back of his mind that was telling him to change the subject as he had said something wrong. But, looking back at it, he hadn't done anything wrong. This was a conversation that they were bound to have, whether they liked it or not. As much as he wanted to break free from the uncomfortable air that surrounded them and avoid seeing Penny cry, he had to clear things once and for all. For four straight days he wondered why Penny didn't want him to know, and even though she gave him an answer, he had a feeling that there was so much more about it that he needed to pry.

"Though, it pains me to say this, I must admit that I was at fault as well." He calmly said, looking away as Penny glanced up at him with wet green eyes. He would never react well with tears. "I had forced myself to believe that what happened between us was a simple nightma—dream, and soon, I believed it." He took in a deep breath (apologizing was not his forte) before turning back to her. "In the short time that I knew of the truth, it has never occurred to me how me—getting you pregnant—has vastly affected your life. Instead of simply worrying about yourself, you were forced to worry for their lives as well. And for that, I apologize."

Penny wiped her tears on the sleeve of her long sleeved shirt, causing Sheldon to take a step back. Did his words make things even worse? He really could not deal with tears, much less Penny's. "I, uh, whole heartedly apologize for that mistake and thank you for not thinking of having the twins aborted. Though, I am not as religious as my mother, I do not sit well with abortion." He placed his hands behind his back and avoided her confused gaze. He also did not do well with 'touchy' subjects. "I will understand if you hate me."

"You know, when I first found out that I was pregnant, I hated you then I hated myself." The blonde admitted, taking a seat on the platform. "I hated you for getting me pregnant and I hated myself for getting you drunk. I couldn't even take care of myself, much less two kids that would rely on me for eighteen years. But, as time went by, I realized that I had to change for the twins. Soon enough, the twins were the ones who made everything better—a little after they turned four months old, I got the call for Halfway There, and everything changed after that. They were the reason why my life is so great—and that's why I can't hate you."

Sheldon glanced down at her, and met her gaze. "Honestly, you gave me the greatest gift I ever received. Without the twins, I would still be an alcoholic and a low paying waitress somewhere in Nebraska. They're the real reason why I give my all in acting, and why all of this became possible." Penny smiled softly up at him and looked as if she had something to ask him. "Sheldon, I didn't tell you because I was afraid that if you knew, you wouldn't stick around for them. I know that you're not really a kid-lover, and I'll understand if you'll choose to forget about all of this. Two kids are hard to handle, and I'll be very mad at you if you suddenly decide to walk out of their lives once they've gotten used to you."

"Penny," he called, hoping that she would allow him to speak. "I know that what I'm about to say will be hard for you to comprehend, but I'll say it anyway." Penny nodded, urging him to continue. "At first, I often protested to Leonard about the twins' presence but after a bit, I quickly grew accustomed to them and can safely say that I do care for them. Now, that I my real role in their lives, I have decided that I will be present in their lives starting now." Penny blinked at him, obviously doubting what he said. "Though, my father was not—what you call—a horrible father, the two of us were not close. We did not have much in common other than being father and son, but we did care for each other. I do not want the twins and I to have the relationship that my father and I shared."

His mind briefly recalled a memory of him sitting silently in their truck while his father rambled on about how Junior was better than him. Then, when he would get upset, his father would buy him a remote controlled car and expected him to just forgive him. He doubted that his father even knew much about him other than the basic information. He didn't want the twins to think of him the way that he thought of his own father, which was why he was having this rather difficult conversation with Penny. Because he wanted to be  _nothing_  like his father. "I may not be able to play actual sports with them or act like how other fathers do, but I can assure you that I will be the best I can be in regards of being a father. If you'd allow me to."

"Do you love them?"

"What?"

"Do you love them?" Penny repeated, standing up from the platform. "The twins?"

Sheldon frowned slightly; he found it annoying how Penny was not able to perceive what he meant in his previous statement. He always had to spell it out to her. "Yes, I do. They are my progeny and though, we got off on a rough start, I cannot deny the fact that I care—" Penny raised an eyebrow at him, clearly unimpressed with his choice of words. "—I meant that I l—love them. I was shocked when I realized it, but, I do. Do not question that."

Suddenly, Penny leapt (literally) towards him and wrapped him in a tight embrace that reminded him of the day that they first met. After Leonard foolishly agreed to get her tv back from her troglodyte boyfriend Kurt who—so kindly, note the sarcasm—pants-ed them. He sighed as she (unexpectedly) started crying, her tears staining his shirt.  _Why_  exactly she was crying, he no longer had a clue. She seemed to cry whether he said something good or bad. It was as if anything that came out of his mouth would make her cry. He gently patted her back as she sobbed—him cringing as she did—and buried her face in her shirt. "Penny, as rude as this may sound; why are you crying?"

"I—I just didn't expect you to react this way," she sniffled, tearing her face off his shirt but still had her arms wrapped around him. "All this time I've been thinking that you wouldn't believe me and you wouldn't accept the twins and you would choose to never see the twins, again!"

He never expected Penny to be  _this_  emotional—nor to bury her face in his already damp t-shirt, again—and simply patted her back. "There, there. Please, stop crying; your tears have already dampened my second shirt, as well."

"See? I told you, leave them and something  _miraculous_  will happen. Penny's probably crying cause she's pregnant—ow!"

Sheldon turned his head towards the door—ignoring Penny's continuous sobbing—and saw Leonard, Howard, and Raj standing there. He lowered his gaze and saw the twins staring at the two of them with wide blue eyes. "Someone,  _please_  get her off of me. It's like a boa constrictor trying to kill me."

Andy looked up at Leonard, his tiny hands gripping the straps of his green turtle backpack. "Uncah Wenad, why is mommy cwying?"

Maddie glanced around, "what we doing hewe? Is mommy okay?"

Penny took a deep breath and finally tore herself from the pouting physicist, turning towards the others. "I'm not crying, and I'm okay." She crouched down beside Sheldon, causing the twins to walk over and stand in front of her. "I'm going to tell you something, okay?"

The twins blinked, waiting for what she was going to tell them. Whenever Penny said that 'she had something to say to them' it usually meant something big. The last time she said that to them was when she announced that she was leaving for a while. "Remember when I said that your daddy couldn't remember you?" They blinked while Sheldon snorted. "Well, he remembers you, now."

Andy gasped dramatically (something he picked up from Gregg) and stared at his mother with wide light blue eyes. "He wemembahs?! No fohget?" Penny placed a hand on his head, smoothing down his mop of blonde hair. "Yes, he remembers you. Sheldon, say something."

Sheldon raised an eyebrow at Penny who was sending him a look then crouched down beside her. "Yes, it seems that I finally  _remembered_  you after suffering from a case of unexplainable temporary amnesia." He tittered, and was met by the twins staring at him with wide eyes. "I, uh, do not expect either of you to call me 'dad' or something akin to that, and I will understand if you choose to call me by m—"

"Daddy!"

"Daddy wemembahs!"

He found himself getting toppled backwards as the twins rushed over to him—both crying like how Penny was—and both snuggled against him. Instead of getting annoyed that his shirt was getting even wetter than before, he placed a hand on both of their backs and attempted to comfort them. It hadn't hit him so strongly before; that he was a father. In his mind, it didn't seem as  _big_  of a deal as he had suddenly realized now. He was now officially responsible for raising two humans that still had a lot to learn. For at least eighteen years he was going to have a say in everything they did, and how they grew up would be reflected on how he was as a father. Even if he had not a single clue on what being a father was, or how he was going to adjust with this change; but he wasn't going back on his word that he would be there for the twins.

"Yes, I remember everything," he glanced up form the top of the twins' heads and saw Leonard and Raj giving him a thumbs up while Howard leaned on the door frame with a grin. He turned slightly and found Penny smiling warmly at him, and he guessed that he would be able to this whole 'parenting' thing right. "I promise both of you that I won't forget either of you, again."

Today was the start of his life as a father.

And it didn't seem as bad as he originally thought.

* * *

 **The future;**  thirteen years later.

* * *

"—well, there's really no doubt in mind that you're going to win, blister." Andy reassuringly said, toying with the zipper of his maroon colored hoodie. "I don't even get why you're nervous."

Maddie stopped pacing, sharply turning to her brother to glare at him. "Is there even a reason to  _not_  be nervous? Why don't you try standing in my shoes and let's see if you won't get nervous!"

Andy swallowed in fear as his twin started pacing again, the side of her tennis racket getting dragged against the floor. "Hey, calm down, Maddie. We still have a few minutes before the game starts—he's going to come." He glanced over his shoulder and found Raj and Leonard rushing towards them. "Uncle Raj, Uncle Leonard, any updates?"

Maddie clucked her tongue as her twin brother continued chatting on with their uncles.

She had no plans of losing when  _neither_  of her parents were present.

This was the first match she ever played that her parents might not attend. In the last ten years of her entering (and winning) every sports tournament, her parents had never missed a single game. Which was why she  _always_  won; they were her lucky charms—well, them and her beloved Winnie the Pooh doll that she had since she was born. The only time she ever lost was during the school chess tournament two years ago, where—for some unknown reason—she had gone up against none other than, Andy. They were the two greatest chess players in the entire school, and they were fighting for who would go through to the International Chess Championship Tournament, which was formed ten years ago when the board of directors changed.

Sadly, her annoying brother won, and she was the one who laughed the hardest when he only placed in third. While her brother went to the ICCT, she represented the country in the International Spelling Bee Competition—practically everything changed and became international in the year 2015—and she placed second. Which was so much better than Andy's third, but of course, Andy wouldn't allow her to get the last laugh. Their parents were present in all of the matches and were very supportive, which was they always won. It was the common denominator in all of her wins, and with how things were going, she had a strong nagging feeling that neither their mom nor their dad would be present. She would have loved for all of them to pose together in a picture as she carried her trophy. If only it was that easy—

"I heard from a certain blonde actor that you're getting nervous." Maddie turned around and was met by a tall, youthful looking man who could easily be thirty as well as forty-three. "I had to make sure that you wouldn't get too nervous."

"Daddy!" She strode towards the suit clad man and pulled him into a tight hug. "I thought that you wouldn't come!"

Sheldon chuckled, hugging his daughter back before pulling away. "I told you I would come. I just had to fix some things at work before heading off here. Have I ever missed a match?"

Maddie furrowed her eyebrows, "well, not really. But, I really thought that you wouldn't come. I'm glad that you did—you're my lucky charm, even if you don't believe in luck."

Andy trotted up to them with a grin, placing an arm around Maddie. "Daddy! You don't know how much Maddie was panicking, earlier. If you were even a bit late, she might have blew up this place."

The tennis champion shrugged her brother's arm off her shoulder and snarled at him. "Daddy? What are you, five? You can't call him daddy!"

"What? Why can't I? That's what I used to call him, and I call him anything I want. He's my dad, too, and I don't think he'll like me calling him pops."

"Cause you're a boy, and boys don't call their dads 'daddy!' Call him something else! You calling him daddy makes him sound bad—and I'm the only one who can call him daddy."

"I think I can call him whatever I want to, Maddie."

"But you're a fifteen year old boy—only kids call their dads daddy. And girls, of course, because I'm dad's princess."

"In what rule book did you read that boys over ten can't call their dads as daddy? You're not the boss of me! And I'm his partner—even better than a princess."

"Oh, I am  _so_  the boss of you, bother! We all know that I'm older than you, and that princesses are better than partners!"

"No, if you check our birth certificates, I was born six minutes  _earlier_  than you were. You and I both have an eidetic memory—we both know that I'm older than you."

"Yeah well, I'm smarter than you! And don't you bring up the whole IQ thing because I will  _seriously_  shove this racket down your throat."

"Violence doesn't make you better than me, Maddie!"

"But it will ruin your voice, making it hard for you to sing when you guest in various shows to promote your movie."

"You wouldn't dare!"

"Try me."

Sheldon sighed as his children bickered in front of him. He never really understood why the twins made fighting their hobby, but it seemed like a natural thing for them to do. Ever since they were toddlers, they always fought over the simplest things, and it didn't surprise him that they were arguing over whether or not Andy should call him daddy. He should have seen this coming when they fought over that dastardly orange crayon, thirteen years ago. Now, it was about missing watches, missing cakes, missing stuffed animals and the nonsensical fights that occurred in between. He just hoped that their fights would never lead to Maddie drowning her brother in toxic waste while Andy made his custom built robot chase after her sister.

There was already enough chaos as is.

"Where's Howard? And did you manage to get the laser to stop moving right when it's about to fire?" Leonard asked as he and Raj walked over to him, still wearing the clothes they wore when Howard's experiment malfunctioned. He could still see the parts of their jackets that got singed. As the department chair, he would have punished them for the damages they made in the engineering room. As their friend for more than twenty years, and an accomplice to the crime, he simply made each of them to chip in to get the holes fixed.

The two time Nobel laureate for Physics dusted off the ashes that sat atop his dark blazer and hummed. "I told Howard to park my car while I tried to get here on time. And for the laser, we found a way to fix it by opening it and tightening the bolts inside. It now works perfectly."

"That's a relief," Raj chirped, grinning up at him. "I don't want to be booted from tenure—if that's even possible."

"The holes are currently covered with faux schematics that Howard designed, and he told me that it will be fixed on Monday. If no one tattles, no one loses the tenure."

"I honestly thought that you wouldn't come, with everything that's happening." Leonard admitted, shrugging off his double jacket that no longer fit in with the fashion trends that Maddie kept updating him about. "Maddie was worried that you'd still be stuck at work—you being here really calmed her down."

Sheldon smiled, "I wouldn't miss my daughter's fourth title even for a third Nobel." He heard Leonard chuckle and saw Howard waving at them, "now, let's get to our seats. Maddie's game is about to start."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Penny's house is actually based on this house -1466 San Pasqual St. Pasadena, I would've put a link but links aren't allowed here and I'm not sure if the house is still on the market. But, yeah just google it and you'll see it, I hope. And, if you'd like a rundown of Penny's money, just say so. She has a lot of money.


	13. Reason Recollection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Penny's missing years.

**April 2010.**

* * *

_Knock, knock, knock._  "Penny."

 _Knock, knock, knock._  "Penny."

 _Knock, knock, knock._  "Penny."

Penny threw a glare at the door, hoping that he would go away if she didn't move.

"Penny, I know you're in there. Your car is still parked outside."

With a grumble, Penny put on her brown jacket and left her room to meet her neighbor. It had been about a week since her cruel break up with Leonard in the bowling alley, and two weeks since the whole dream about Sheldon. She felt so bad about breaking Leonard's heart, and even worse for cheating on him with Sheldon. Leonard told her that he loved her, and she couldn't even say it back. What was worse, was that she allowed Wil Wheaton to play with her mind—she could even hear Leonard's sobbing from her apartment. She also often hear Raj and Howard talking in the hall about how heartbroken Leonard was, and she just couldn't forgive herself for what she did. She was so pathetic, and she was a coward. That may have been the lowest thing she had ever done in her life.

That was why she was avoiding 4A, it's residents and it's visitors altogether. She felt so bad about what she did that she couldn't show her face to them. She was a horrible person, and she didn't deserve their friendship. The moment she walked out of the bowling alley she broke Leonard's heart and Sheldon's trust after he went through so much effort to get her back on the team. He would even kick Leonard out if she wanted to. The problem was; being around Sheldon was even more uncomfortable than with the weepy Leonard. Each time she saw the lanky physicist, all she could see was that dreaded night of the Chancellor's Award, and that she should  _never_  drink alcohol, again. She wasn't even sure if Sheldon knew that it happened—and if he did and pretended that it didn't, then that was great.

The scars on her hip had healed, but she could still feel them reminding her off all the evil she caused.

"Hey, Sheldon," she greeted, sounding distant as she opened the door. "How can I help you?"

The tall man raised an eyebrow at—probably her messy appearance—her and cleared his throat. "Hello, Penny. I am here to ask a favor of you."

She leaned against the door frame and looked up at him; wishing that he would just go away already. All she wanted was some quiet time before she had to go to work then to an audition for a lead role in a new show. She needed to compose herself if she wanted to finally get an actual acting job. "What favor? And I thought that you didn't like favors cause it meant that you would to do something for me in return?"

"Yes, that is true, but drastic times call for drastic measures." He tilted his head to the side in thought before glancing back at her. "I need you to accompany me to the mall in pursuit of finding a suitable gift for a tenured professor at the university's birthday. I do not trust my choices, and believe that you will be able to help me."

Wow, this must have been the first time that Sheldon ever thought that she was good at something. What a surprise. "I'm sorry, sweetie, but I have to work until four then I'll be going to an audition, and I'm only free after that. Today's HALO night, right?"

Sheldon's eye twitched briefly and he sighed, "yes, it is. But, the party is tomorrow, and if I ever expect to be given tenure I have to—metaphorically—suck up to him. Everyone else has a gift, and I'm the only one who doesn't. I'll pay for both of our dinners?"

She really didn't want to go with him, but he had on this… pleading look that was just begging her to say yes. Her original plans for the day were to go to work, go to the audition and if she didn't get it, sulk back at home for the rest of the night. It she got it, she would party back at home for the rest of the night. Both led to her returning back to her apartment, not going shopping with the person she wanted to avoid the most. But, since she knew that she had a soft spot for the whack-a-doodle, "fine. I'll go with you." She watched him perk up and immediately questioned her sanity. "I'll text you when I'm done with the audition."

"Of course! I thank you, again, Penny!" He chirped as she made her way down the stairs.

Why he was so happy, she really didn't know. But, it was safe to say that she was  _not_  happy with her day at all.

Her whole day at the Cheesecake Factory was a gigantic mess. Two waitresses didn't come in so she had to cover  _both_  of their tables because the assistant manager—the actual manager was out—said so, then she had to come in for the bartender as well, cause the assistant manager said that she wasn't doing anything. Then, one of the servers got  _three_  orders wrong and two of the tables got mad at her for it. Then, there was a problem with the cashier, so it took longer for the bill to be processed, causing the customers to get impatient and to not give her a tip. Then, during her lunch break she accidentally dropped her fries and the manager (again) thought that it was for a customer and told her that it would be deducted to her paycheck.

Then, during the last thirty minutes of her shift, there was a table with a cranky looking mom, an aloof dad and an overly energetic kid. Unfortunately, they were sitting on one of the tables that she was forced to take. It took the dad five minutes to decide whether or not he wanted cheese on his burger—the wife nagging him the entire time—while the kid kept kicking the table and wiping his snot on the side of her skirt. When she was about to give them the bill, the kid kept jumping up and down and  _vomited_  all over her uniform. And for some,  _stupid_  reason the mom even had the nerve to blame her. Her. The woman kept saying that  _she_  placed something in her kid's food and that was why he vomited—and not because her kid just couldn't sit still for even a second.

If they ever came back, she swore that she would spit on their food.

The audition was for the lead role in a new show called 'Halfway There.' Based on what she read on the script that an assistant handed her, it was about a successful woman who was accidentally killed and was allowed to live again  _if_  she helps with a problem. The woman is then transformed to look like the younger version of herself—the role she was auditioning for—and is given an entirely new identity; Jane. There really wasn't a specific appearance that they wanted for the character, since they had yet to cast the older version, but based on what she heard from the other hopefuls, this was the third time they called for an audition for the character. Apparently the unnamed director was not happy with any of the women that the executive producers (they were the ones who picked for this show) picked, as they usually picked the pretty ones who couldn't act—but could do 'favors.'

"You're next," the casting director said, and Penny felt her getting even more nervous as they walked down the hall. "Is this your first acting job? It says here that you've done a few local plays."

"Uh yeah, it is. Getting pretty nervous actually." The man chuckled and scribbled something on his clipboard. "Um, is it true that it's the executive producers who are choosing, and that they're only picking pretty ones?"

"Honestly speaking, that's true. I'm not sure why, but they don't really care much for talent—all they want is a pretty face. Not that you're not pretty, but they're looking for the ones who can be their girlfriend. They think that a pretty face alone can make it work." He sighed, peeking through the little window in the door, "the director is really frustrated about it, that's why he kept on holding auditions. If the show doesn't find an actress soon, it might get scrapped. Which is a shame, cause it has a  _lot_  of potential."

A kind of happy girl exited the room and the man gestured for her to go inside. "Good luck, and do your best."

The moment she stepped in, she saw about four old men staring at her like she was a slab of meat. Dirty old men, god. There were a few more decent looking people, but based on everything she heard, it was all up to those men that could be older than her dad. Where was this so-called picky director when you needed him?

"Okay, Penny, can you please read scene thirty-four, Jane and Peter part five."

She took a deep breath and glanced down at the script in her hands. She could do this. She would do this. If she got this, it would be goodbye Cheesecake Factory and goodbye unsuccessful streak as an aspiring actress.

"What? What do you mean that I can't be me?" She snarled, pretending as if she had a clue on what this Jane girl was mad about. "You can't just kill me by accident, then tell me that the only way I can live again is by fixing  _your_  mistakes and that I can only do it if I become a whole new person! That's not how it works!"

The casting director cleared his throat and read the next line with her. "Calm down. That is how things are done here, and if you want a second chance, you have to do it. Don't you want to live again?"

"I want to live as  _me_ ," Penny hissed, tapping a finger on her chest, "not as me when I was pathetic! Why can't I continue living on as myself when you already admitted that it was your mistake! And I don't give a single damn if this is 'good for me' the only person I can be is me, now, not the me that was naive and stupid!"

"That was excellent!" The casting director said, smiling wildly as he applauded along with the other staff in the room. With the way they clapped and cheered, she had a good feeling that she was going to get the part. Even she knew that she did great, because she gave her all in those two lines. "What do you think?"

She turned and found the four men frowning at her, seemingly unimpressed. In the short time that she acted, she had forgotten all about those four men that would decide on whether or not she was good. Dammit. Dammit. Dammit! She could already tell that they didn't even listen to her with the way one of them was staring at her chest. She was auditioning for a role in a show—not for Playboy!

"Hmm, I don't know." One man said. "I think she could have done better."

"I envision Jean—"

"It's Jane," the casting director corrected.

" _Jane_ , to be a bit taller. With a smaller face."

"It says here that she has green eyes," one of them said with a lisp, eying her face. "Are green eyes even possible? I've never seen anyone with green eyes."

"Me neither. How can she even have green eyes?"

"That's true, I don't think she fits the part. She should have blue eyes. Green doesn't look natural."

The next thing Penny knew, she was sitting in her car, crying because she had unnatural looking  _green_  eyes. She didn't even want to have green eyes! She was just born with it—and it wasn't that she didn't like the fact that she had them, she just couldn't understand why out of all the possible reasons, it was her eyes that caused her to lose the audition. She would understand if it was her hair, or her figure, or the way she talk or she was a bad actress or something. She could do something about all of those! She could dye her hair, she could lose weight, she could practice an accent and she could take up acting classes if her budget allowed her to! But she just couldn't accept a reason as crappy as her having green eyes! What kind of an explanation was that?! She was great, and they knew it!

She was just so sick of all the failure and the bad luck she was getting. Her life was going nowhere, and it was getting depressing. This was the thirty-third audition that she didn't get, and it was exhausting to keep positive. She was getting exhausted with all of the rejection and the disappointment she was getting. Was it so wrong for her to want to be a successful actress or even get a decent acting job, even? She couldn't understand why the universe was so against her being happy—was it karma for breaking Leonard's heart and cheating on him with Sheldon? She didn't expect herself to those things, and if she could, she would take it all back! She would fix all her mistakes if she could, if they would just let her.

She had had enough of everything that was happening to her. It was as if the universe and karma had teamed up and was out to get her. Maybe, it was because of all the boyfriend stealing she did when she was younger, or all the underage drinking she did, or all the sleeping around, or the misbehaving, or the breaking Leonard's heart or for forcing Sheldon to drink. It could be either of them, or all of them. She didn't know, and she would probably never know. Because now, her mind was blank and all she could see was that there no reason left for her to stay in California. She had lost her boyfriend, her job was a dead end road and her one chance at her dream was shattered because of the color of her eyes.

So, like what any depressed person would do, she decided that it was high time that she left.

_Hey Sheldon, I can't go with u. Sorry._

* * *

**Omaha, Nebraska**.

* * *

What Penny hated about being depressed was that she loved eating without reason.

From fish to chicken to pork to beef with bread, mashed potatoes and slightly inappropriate mac n' cheese. Then, there were the less healthy ones like every brand of chocolate that she could get her hands on; from Twixx to Snickers to M&Ms to Reeses butter cups to Hershey's to Crunch to cereal without any milk. She also grew a strange dislike with the scent of cinnamon—which was why they threw out the Cinnamon Toast Crunch—but she was okay with everything else as long as it was edible. Comfort food or not, as long as it seemed good, she ate it.

The bad thing about eating all of those food at the same time (eating roast chicken with melted chocolate on the side) was that it seemed to  _greatly_  upset her stomach. She'd be eating one moment then vomiting the next, then eating again. Because she suddenly loved eating that she already felt as if she was becoming so fat. She really didn't care, though, it wasn't like she had to maintain her figure. She wasn't getting an acting job anytime soon, so she guessed that she could let herself go. Nobody loved her, anyway, and no one would care if she went from blonde bombshell to military tank in ten minutes. She didn't have anyone to impress—and had no intentions of getting a boyfriend—so, it really didn't matter what she did wither her life.

On one particular day, Penny was lounging on their couch using her laptop. It was a habit of hers to stare at the new message option in the mailing sites, thinking if she should send the guys an email explaining why she left. She spent a lot of time thinking of what she'd write to each of the guys, actually writing something before deleting it without a second thought. She knew that they were all worried about her, and it showed in the three times a day email that Leonard sent her that she directed to her spam folder. It used to be via text and calls, but she made sure to change her number so that she would stop getting guilty of what she did. She blocked them on all of her social networking accounts, but she kept her email because she at least had to had that.

Another person that seemed to remember her was Sheldon. Aside from the monthly email he sent to everyone, she was surprised to find out that he sent her a personal email daily. Each one told her about what happened in each week and how Sheldon had to deal with Leonard caterwauling over her absence. Each one also told her about how he was annoyed with the changes that were happening with her gone. How he had to take the bus because Leonard didn't want to go to work; how he had to do various menial tasks on his own—like grocery shopping—because Leonard didn't want to leave his filthy bedroom, how he actually  _got_ a driver's license so he could drive, but Leonard wouldn't lend him his car, nor could he actually drive.

She didn't understand why he was emailing her each week, or why she kept reading them, but she did. The emails made her feel as if she was still in their circle of friends—that she hadn't screwed up her life. Unlike Leonard's, she didn't put Sheldon's emails in the spam folder, and she read over them whenever she missed the guys. She normally ignored the parts where he complained about how she broke his trust by not going with him to the mall, and she was often tempted to send him an apology. She didn't, because she wanted to be fair to everyone. She wanted to completely remove them from her life, but she just couldn't. It was as if no matter how hard she tried, she still yearned to be back in her old life.

Penny was snacking on a bag of Cheetos when she realized that she hadn't read Sheldon's email from the previous week. Placing the bag on the side she grabbed her laptop and opened the new email.

_**SUBJECT:** _ _Weekly Update_

_**FROM:** _DrSheldonCooper_ _

_**TO:** _ _Pennyblossom_

_Salutations,_

_As you know, it has been nearly two months since you left Pasadena with no explanation whatsoever. Not much has changed since my last email, and Leonard is still weepier than ever. He seems to prefer songs from the nineties, now and Raj is not helping by lending him DVDs of depressing movies._

_The other day, Leonard was watching Titanic and kept on singing a horrible, cringe worthy version of Celine Dion's My Heart Will Go On. He kept saying that you were 'Jack' and he was 'Rose' and that one day you would be together, again. In my opinion, I believe that he considers you as dead to him, and that he is a young, attractive woman who has strayed from her family just because she foolishly in love with a dirt poor man that, unfortunately, died. Raj thinks it's romantic, but I do not see what exactly was romantic about it. I strongly believe that Leonard needs a checkup with a doctor, just to check if he has lost his mind._

_Raj and Howard have slightly drifted apart with Bernadette's inclusion to our group, and Raj has now opted to bother me each time he can. He seems to enjoy prodding me to joining him and Leonard's movie marathons. I would, but as they are watching foolish romance movies, I shall not. One can only take so much while watching the movie called Notting Hill._

_Ever since you left, Leonard declared that we would never eat at the Cheesecake Factory, again. As Bernadette no longer works there, and I do not trust any of the remaining staff, I ordered Raj to find a suitable restaurant to have my Tuesday burger. Surprisingly, he found an acceptable one called 'the Tomato Project' and their barbecue, bacon, cheeseburger is even better than the Cheesecake Factory's. They also serve a large variety of food that Howard is nagging me to try. I might, but there's no room in my carefully planned schedule for a new food day._

_I am unsure of why I am updating you of our daily lives, but Raj said that it's social protocol to do so. I am still very furious on your sudden exit, and have awarded you nineteen strikes for what have you done. My mind will never be able to erase the embarrassment I got when I went to Professor Lancaster's birthday without a gift. The only way you will get to remove the strikes is to come back and fix Leonard before he becomes too unbearable._

_That is all for now._

_Dr. Sheldon Cooper._

She stared at the email for another second before bolting up from the couch and rushing to the bathroom to—god, she hated it—vomit everything she ate.

"Penny," her older sister, Barbara, called, standing in front of the door. "Just curious—when was your last period?"

Splashing her face with cold water, she counted back—

Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.

She was so, so, so, so,  _so_  very screwed.

"The thirteenth."

"Of?"

"March."

The bathroom door opened and her sister shoved a rectangular box in her hands. "I thought so. I didn't want to say something at first, but you're eating everything in this house. Go pee on it."

Penny furrowed her eyebrows; this could  _not_  be happening. "Fine, I will but this won't be proving anything."

One stick later, she did not like the positive sign on the thing that was laughing at her. Her sister handed her ten more after that, and all ten either gave her a blue line, a positive sign and all of them told her that she was—in fact—pregnant.

"Congratulations," Barbara sarcastically said as she dropped the boxes into the trash. "I'm going to be an aunt." She sent her sister an  _I'm-going-to-kill-you_ look before choking back a sob because she was so screwed. She couldn't take care of herself, and now, she had take care of another person! She didn't even have a job, and she was pregnant! She didn't even know how to react!

Just to make sure, she and Barbara went to the doctor to confirm if she really was pregnant. Her name was Dr. Faraday and she had seen her before with Barbara. The woman was Barbara's obgyne and friend and Penny liked her until she said, "congratulations, Penny! You're twelve weeks pregnant!" She paled at that, and the doctor continued, "and there's more! You're pregnant with twins! Would you like to hear the heartbeat?"

What she really wanted to say was; what do you mean that I'm twelve week pregnant? You're just joking! And how could I be pregnant with twins? I'm not pregnant those are just all of the junk food I've been eating! What she actually said was, "yes, I'd like to hear the heartbeat." And she did, and she cried when she heard the thumping because of two reasons; one, she was pregnant and two, she really was pregnant.

Right after the check up—she was slightly accepting the fact that she was pregnant—they ate a nice restaurant that Barbara paid for, because what they were about to do was something very, very important.

"What do you mean you're twelve weeks pregnant with twins?" Her dad's voice boomed, causing her, Barbara and their mom to cringe from their spot on the couch. As much as she didn't want to tell her parents, Barbara told her that she  _had_  to tell them. Well, it really wasn't that she didn't want to tell them, it was more like she was afraid of how her dad would react. When she returned home, he kept on nagging to her on how it was stupid of her to move to California in the first place, and that she should have just stayed with them on the farm. How he always knew that Kurt was one of her worst boyfriends, that he was nothing but trouble. He never really was supportive, in the first place, so, she wasn't startled by his reaction. "How could you be so stupid?"

She flinched at the intensity of his voice and looked away from his angry brown eyes. She had memorized his moods by just the shade of his eyes. When he was happy, it was a soft light brown; when he was emotionless, it was a dark brown and when he was  _furious_  it was so dark that it seemed like he had black colored eyes. "I… didn't expect this to happen, dad, believe m—"

"I'm sure that that Leonard guy you're dating will take responsibility, right? He's the only seemingly decent guy that you ever dated, and from the looks of it, he'd drop everything to be with you. He probably won't even question if it's his.

Penny glanced at Barbara who nodded reassuringly before turning back to her dad. "Uh, actually dad, I broke up with him. That's why I moved back here." She felt her mother start to cry and her dad's face became unreadable. Which meant one thing; he was really, really,  _really_  angry. Maybe, the angriest she had ever seen him in years.

"I can't believe how irresponsibly you are!" Her dad exclaimed so loudly that she was sure that the animals in the barn could hear his voice. "Your mother and I raised you better than this, Penny! Well, call up that Leonard guy and tell him that you're pregnant with his kid!"

She took a deep breath, holding back the tears and her eyes and said what she resisted telling them. She knew it in her heart that Leonard wasn't the father, and that lying that he was would be another one of the bad things she'd come to regret in the future. She spent half of her life doing bad things, and she'd do something right at least once. "Leonard's not the father, dad."

"What do you mean he isn't the father? He's your boyfriend, right? How are you so sure that he isn't—unless you screwed around with a different guy! You did! i can't believe this!"

If Penny could rate the intensity of her dad's anger on one to ten, she would say that he was a twenty point nine.  _This_  was the angriest she had ever seen her dad and she was shocked that his voice wasn't powerful enough to blow the walls off from the house. His voice bounced off the walls and she was sure that it turned into knives, stabbing her from every direction. It was then that she realized how much of a disappointment and a failure she really was. She was such a horrible person, and she couldn't help but cry as her dad stormed out of the house and started taking his anger out by chopping wood.

What if… what if she told Sheldon? Sure, he was going to doubt her at first, but once he gets a paternity test and sees that he really was the father, he would probably do everything for the kids. She didn't really care about herself—she would manage—all she cared about was the two humans growing inside her. She didn't want them to be deprived nor become uneducated and she was sure that if Sheldon  _did_  care, he would want his 'offspring' to be raised properly. Heck, knowing him, he would probably teach them physics before they would understand and it would seclude them in a life full of science. But, if it meant that they would be raised well, she had no objections.

When everything died down, she went up to her room and tried to calm herself by eating more junk food. Barbara (and their mom) told her that starting tomorrow, she would start eating healthy as she was not eating for just one, but for three. Then, they would be fixing up her room to include a nursery as well. Their mom and Barbara promised to be there for her along the way, and ensured her that their dad would calm down, eventually.

Before she slept, she saw that she had a new email from Sheldon.

_**SUBJECT:** _ _(no subject)_

_**FROM:** DrSheldonCooper_

_**TO:** _ _Pennyblossom_

_Woman, you do not understand how much trouble you are causing in you absence. Ever since you left there has been nothing but chaos in my life. Leonard has opted not to go to work on most days, causing me to take the bus and sometimes walk. My schedule is ruined with the removal of the Cheesecake Factory as my Tuesday burger, and although the Tomato Project is better in terms of food and service, it is not the Cheesecake Factory. With your apartment vacant, there had been various interested people who checked it, but I do not like any of them and drove them away._

_Do you know how much effort it took for me to accommodate you into my life and schedule? A lot, Penny. And you know that I absolutely detest change. I have spent two years overlooking your cons and getting accustomed to your presence and it barely took you a day to disregard all of the hard work I've done._

_Just yesterday, Leonard threw a hissy fit over you. Yes, you. He saw one of your shirts that you had left behind and started wailing on how you would someday realize that you did love him and that you would get back together with him again. I told him that there was a small possibility of happening and he had a sudden outburst. He started throwing our things, and destroying various collectible while yelling about how wrong you were for leaving him. Words cannot describe how outraged I am on what he did. It took me years before I attained some of the things he destroyed, and I will never forget how he screamed 'Why can't Penny just love me back?' as he smashed my mint edition Nightcrawler action figure against the wall._

_Why is it that you are always the cause of all my misery and all of the embarrassment I've ever endured? If Leonard never said hi to you in the hall three years ago, a lot of the bad things that has occurred in my life would have never happened. I wouldn't have been pants-ed by your neanderthal ex-boyfriend and be forced to walk all the way to the other end of the street while being half naked. I wouldn't have gotten sick the first time. Howard wouldn't have been upset enough to not care about M.O.N.T.E. when we needed him. If you hadn't led Leonard on for the cheap price of coitus and the small possibility that you would reciprocate his pathetic love for you, he wouldn't have betrayed me by ruining my experiment and causing me to become the biggest laughing stock of the university._

_If you didn't play with Leonard's emotions, he would have brought me to Switzerland instead of you. Even when you knew how much going to the Large Hadron Collider meant to me. If you hadn't gotten me sick as well, I would have been the one that Leonard took instead of Raj. If I hadn't saved you from you little slip, I wouldn't have missed Stan Lee nor have a record on my nonexistent driver's license. If you didn't coax me to drink, I wouldn't have become the laughing stock of the university for the second time. If you hadn't stormed out of the bowling arena, our team wouldn't have lost and cause us to be humiliated by dressing up as female superheroes counterparts. If you had at least helped me pick out a gift, I wouldn't be the laughing stock of the university for the the third time. If you didn't break Leonard's heart, living with him wouldn't be unbearable._

_My life wouldn't be as problematic if you weren't in it._

_Is my misery the cause of your happiness?_

_However, regardless of all of that it seems that I do miss_

She stared at the abrupt end of the message before bursting into tears. That alone was already a sign that she shouldn't even bother to tell him that she was pregnant. He already made it clear that he hated her guts and that he wished that he had never met her. She didn't care if there was more to the message that wasn't showing up, there was nothing that could make her feel better about it. She was the cause of his misery, and she felt bad because it was true. Everything she accused him of was true, and that was why she cried herself to sleep that night.

If she got him involved, she would only be ruining his life, again.

* * *

She honestly hated being pregnant.

She had all of these uncontrollable mood swings and she kept peeing. She had to pee each time she didn't want to pee, and even when she already peed, she still had to pee. She was often tired even if she didn't do anything other than lie on the couch and her bed. Like she had been working in the farm all day, when really her mom told her not to do anything too strenuous. She found it hard to move around the house and she sometimes had lower back pain that made her feel old. At seventeen weeks pregnant, she already felt like she was as big as a blimp and all the food cravings weren't helping, either. She grew an affinity for lots and lots of meat and suddenly grew annoyed with the smell of butter—anything with butter made her want to throw up.

The only good thing was that her morning sickness had stopped, and she didn't have to rush to the bathroom just to puke out everything she ate. Although, in place of that was her peeing every minute, but that was definitely better than puking. She really hated vomiting, even if she grew slightly used to doing it when she hadn't found out that she was pregnant. That, and the fact that she was being treated like a princess cause she apparently was not allowed to get too stressed or else it would affect the babies. She also had to eat healthy. She often missed McDonalds and their breakfast meals, but the smell of the McMuffin made her want to kill herself.

She also became a bit more solemn with each week that passed in her pregnancy. She wasn't sure if she would be a good mother to the twins. She really wasn't mother material, and wasn't all that great with kids. Yeah, she was close with her sister's kids, but that didn't necessarily mean that she would be crowned as mother of the year. She didn't even have a job, and was just relying on her dad for all of her medical needs. How was she supposed to raise two kids all by herself?! Telling Sheldon was already removed as an option, and each time she thought about it, her mind would drift back to the email and she would cry endlessly.

"Penny, are you okay?" She heard Barbara ask as she entered her room. They had already fixed her room to turn a part of it into the nursery. Her bed was now pushed next to the wall to make room for the changing table while the two cribs sat on the opposite end of the room. All of the furniture was from her sister and she was grateful that she was there for her. "I heard you crying and I wasn't sure if it was over a simple thing or something serious. What's up?"

Penny sighed as the older blonde sat down beside her on the bed. There really was no use of keeping her problems all to herself. "What if I won't be a good mother? What if they hate me?"

"They might hate you if you sing, but as long as you love them and want the best for them, they won't hate you." Her sister placed an arm around her and pulled her close. She and Barbara weren't really the closes of sisters when they were younger since there was normally competition between them; but when Barbara got pregnant in her late teens, she suddenly changed. The unspoken rivalry between them disappeared as Barbara matured, and she had been a supportive sister ever since. Barbara had always been their dad's favorite cause she was blonde and perfect—sans the fact that she got pregnant at eighteen—so, their dad wasn't as mad when she told that her boyfriend (now her husband that she accidentally shot) got her pregnant.

That was when Barbara's persona changed dramatically from her former I'm-so-much-cooler-than-you to the prim and proper one that she was, now. She became the one who defended her from their dad whenever he got mad at something she did. She was the one who helped her with her math homework and helped her sneak out to go to a party. Barbara was also the one who brought her along to the movie premiere in the city where she realized that she wanted to be an actress. It was also Barbara who told her to follow her dreams because she ruined her future when she got pregnant. It wasn't surprising that it was also Barbara who was helping her out, now. She was such a good sister to her. "Besides, we're all here to help you out, you know? I know dad isn't showing it, but he's really excited to have more grandkids. He doesn't care about the gender, as long as they're healthy."

"I've been thinking about abortion—"

Barbara turned to her with wide green eyes, "don't you dare finish that sentence!"

"Relax," Penny said, blinking at her scary looking older sister. "I was just thinking about it realized that I would never do it. Even if I can't take care of them, I just can't end their lives." Her sister sighed in relief and she continued. "But, I am thinking of having them adopted."

"What?" Barbara exclaimed, her expression darkening again. "Why would you even think of doing that?! Those are my nieces or nephews or both—they're a part of our family, and no one is going to be sent away to live somewhere else."

The younger blonde played with a loose thread on the hem of her shirt. "I don't know—I don't think that I'll be a good mother. I don't think I'll be able to give them a good future, and I don't want that. I thought that, maybe, if I put them up adoption, they might get a good family that will love them and give them everything that I won't be able to give."

"They won't need anyone else more than you, Pen." The blondes turned away from each other and found their father standing at the door, eavesdropping on their conversation. "Barbara, can I have some time to talk to Penny?"

Barbara nodded, letting go of Penny's hand and stepping out of the room while their dad took replaced her beside Penny. "Listen, I know I reacted a bit too violently, before, and I hope that you forgive me if you were frightened by my actions. I didn't really mean to get that angry, I was just really shocked. Penny, you are my youngest child, and I wanted you to become better than any of us ever were. Neither your mom or I finished college, and Barbara ruined that chance by getting pregnant at seventeen. Then, there's Mark, but we all know that drugs just isn't something you should mess with."

Her dad paused for a moment, obviously contemplating the words he was going to use. "I'm not happy about any of the various wrong decisions you've made, or that you got pregnant by someone who isn't your boyfriend—but, it doesn't mean that I want you to give up my grandkids. I'm not very good with these kind of talks, but I'm really trying," he said with a small chuckle, and Penny noted that his eyes were of a soft shade of brown. "I don't show it much, but I'm really excited to have more grandchildren, and I already love those two that are growing inside of you. There's no need to think of giving them up because me, your mom and your sister will be helping you along the way."

Penny held back her tears as her dad placed a hand on her head like he used to do and patted her gently. "I said a lot of bad things to you, and I didn't want to hurt you. I'm sorry about all of them, slugger. I just wanted you to know that I love you a lot, and that I'm going to be here for you forever. Even though you're about to give me grandchildren, you'll always be my little slugger who I used to play catch with. Except now, you'll be adding two more sluggers to the family roster."

"Oh dad," she cried, hugging her dad as she cried. She had always waited for the moment that her dad would call her slugger, again. When she went through puberty, she felt as if her dad didn't care about her anymore. He always wanted another boy, and it was an open secret that he was disappointed when she turned out to be a girl. There was just something so comforting about her dad's words that she just couldn't help but cry. "I love you, too."

Her dad pulled away and gave her the bright smile he used to send her whenever they played catch. "I love you, too, slugger. Now, why don't we go tractor racing with Barbara like old times?"

* * *

One thing Penny did not like about being pregnant—other than being as big as a whale—was the having to go to the doctor's appointment or else front that everyone in her family had whenever she was too lazy to get up from whatever she was lying on.

Apparently, this was the 'big scan' at twenty weeks that her mother, father and sister kept gushing about. They pretty much got excited over every little thing—she did, too, but they didn't need to know that—and would cause a commotion whenever one of the babies moved. One of them would yell, calling the others, and they would all crowd around her waiting for the baby to move, again. The other day, Barbara's family tagged along with her, and her sister kept on telling them about it that one of her nephews stared at her stomach for ten minutes, waiting for movement.

She didn't show it much, but she herself felt giddy whenever there was some sort of progress. She loved listening to the file that the doctor sent her of the heartbeats, and daydreaming about how they would look when they came out. She still wasn't a hundred percent sure that she would be the greatest mother alive, but she was looking forward to it. She was excited to dress up a little girl or two, playing sports with the boys, and the girls if they became athletic. She sometimes wondered if they would become geniuses, and envisioned herself raising two ingenious kids that would possibly be smart enough to rule the world. It was a bit scary to think about it, but she would love them whether they were smart or not.

But, she still did not look forward to the checkups. Dr. Faraday's gel warmer always stopped working and both she and the twins hated the feeling of the icy cold gel. There were times when it was warmed up, but it was more often than not cold enough for the twins to feel. Fortunately, the gel warmer worked and then Dr. Faraday went to work. The five minutes that passed as the doctor took measurements and clicked on the keyboard every now and then was the longest five minutes she had ever endured. Both Barbara and Dr. Faraday were silent, and only the sound of the air conditioning and the occasional clicking sounds filled the room.

Finally, Dr. Faraday turned to her with a bright smile.

"And there they are," the doctor said as she turned the monitor to face them, "your babies at twenty weeks."

And Penny fell in love with two beings that were yet to be born.

Penny stared in awe at the black and white image of her twins. They were so… beautiful, and she had never ever seen something as perfect as the creatures growing inside of her. She had always questioned why her family got all excited whenever she had a checkup and why couples were often happy when they discover that they were about to have a child. But, now she understood the warm feeling that all of them had. She watched as the white-coated woman give her a guided tour of her unborn children and knew that her entire world had shifted. Everything she held important had shifted down a notch to make way for the two little people inside her. She was going to be a  _mother_ , and she couldn't help but smile at the thought of it. Maybe, she could pull this off. Maybe, she really could become a good mother.

She barely took in what Dr. Faraday said, just registering the little fingers and toes on the screen. She could already tell that the one on the left was going to look like her, while the one on the right already looked like Sheldon. Well, he or she didn't look  _exactly_  like him, but she had a feeling in her gut that this one was going to be a mini Sheldon. She was going to have a Sheldon and a mini version of her own.

"Beautiful, huh?" Dr. Faraday suggested, printing out a set of the scan photos—Barbara made it clear that they all wanted a set of their own—and handed it to her sister. "So, Penny do you want to know the genders?"

Penny curtly shook her head and smiled at her sister's friend. "No, not really. I'd actually like it to be a surprise."

Barbara tittered beside her, "my sister loves surprise. She says that it would be better if she didn't know what their genders are. I, for one, would love to know if they're two boys, or two girls or one of each, but they're not mine… so."

Dr. Faraday chuckled as Penny stood from the chair, "well, all I can say is that you'll be pleased." With a confused look, Penny made her way to the bathroom to change. She'd find out the twins' genders soon, anyway.

* * *

**November 2010.**

* * *

In Penny's twenty-three years of life—turning twenty-four in a few weeks!—she had experienced so many surprises and unexpected turn of events that she didn't expect to get surprised by another one.

She was turning twenty-one when she moved to apartment 4A and met two guys who changed her life. She was twenty one when she thought that her career would finally take off, which really didn't happen. She was twenty-two when she realized that she liked Leonard and took a chance on him. She was twenty-three when she made one of the biggest mistakes of her life; making Sheldon drink alcohol and having a drunken one night stand with him. It was a week later when she realized that she couldn't tell Leonard that she loved him, causing her to break his heart in the worst way possible. It was the week after that when another realization hit her in the face—that she would never become an actress, ever. It was two months later when she got the biggest surprise of her life; that she was pregnant with twins.

So, when Dr. Faraday told her that she was due on December 5, she expected that she still had a month before she finally gave birth. However, since twins (supposedly) tend to come early, she was told that she could go into labor after November 10. Which was actually great, cause she was getting real tired of being a whale that waddled, the side effects, and waiting for when she would finally get to meet her twins. She loved the thought of bringing new lives into the world, but she seriously hated the swollen ankles; the practically always sore back, the need to always be lying down, standing becoming some sort of cruel challenge and the mood swings. She often snapped at her dad for being too overly excited over his grandchildren—she apologized all the time—and cried thinking that her mom was lying whenever she said that she was beautiful.

Dr. Faraday had briefed her of everything that she'd be experiencing during her pregnancy when she had her first check up. What Dr. Faraday didn't tell her, was that she could really give birth anytime.

It was two days before her earlier due date that she felt her water break. They were out in the town having lunch when she began feeling cramps. It was mild, disappearing quickly—before coming back. Her dad decided that they would just finish their lunch then they would go to the hospital. Sadly, nothing ever goes as planned, and halfway through her peach cobbler; she had her first real contraction, immediately followed by her water breaking. She even screamed a bit, and she was sure that she looked like she had peed her pants with the way the bottom of her dress was soaked. Luckily, the restaurant staff came to their aid, helping them rush to her dad's truck to get to the hospital. Her mom's hand was really abused during the whole happening.

Barbara arrived at the hospital with her husband (and boyfriend since high school) Hank about twenty minutes later, and her sister kept panicking about something none of them understood. She guessed that her sister was just really invested in her pregnancy. Frustrating as it was, the doctors told her that it might take several more hours before she would be ready to deliver.

A little after midnight (finally!) she was placed on a gurney and was wheeled into the delivery room. After a long discussion—five games of rock, paper, scissors—it was her mom who went with her. Barbara wasn't too happy, since she was her self proclaimed 'coach,' but once their mom made a decision it was final. She was actually glad that it was her mom instead of Barbara, because she was so close to strangling to her antsy sister who was a bit too involved in her pregnancy. She and her mom wasn't as close as she and her dad were when she was young, but she really loved her mom. Her mom was the only sane one in her family during her pregnancy, and was the one who actually lifted her spirits whenever she got frustrated over her dad and sister.

It was around one in the morning of November 9 when she gave birth to her son, and her daughter followed six minutes later. When Dr. Faraday told her that she would be having twins, she immediately assumed that they would be of the same gender. She had never took in the fact that Sheldon and Missy were not of the same gender—but, she doubted that that had something to do with the gender. Both were very healthy babies, even though they were born a bit early.

When she finally held both of them, she couldn't stop crying for some reason. There was just so much love in heart for them that she still couldn't believe that she had given birth to two beautiful babies—Barbara even wondering if she had a case of postpartum depression, which she did  _not_  have—and couldn't help but stare in awe at them. Her son had thin light blonde hair, light blue eyes and they all noticed that he looked like she did when she was a baby. Barbara even joked to her that their dad finally had a male version of her like he had always wanted. Her daughter had a full head of golden blonde hair and the exact same piercing sky blue eyes that Sheldon had. It actually felt like she was staring at a blonde, female version of Sheldon with the striking resemblance that he and his daughter had. A mini Sheldon and a mini Penny; how cute.

"So, sis," Barbara started as she fumbled with her husband's video camera. "What are you planning on naming them? If you don't have any ideas, I have a list you might want to see."

Penny hummed, placing her spoon down on the plate. "Well, I was thinking that I'd name him Andrew; so that he'd be called Andy, and he would have all of the  _Toy Story_  toys with him. Then, I'd name her Madison, cause  _Splash_  just really makes the name sound great. I just love everything Tom Hanks."

"If the Sheldon guy was here, what would he name them?" Her dad asked from the table at the corner of her room. "Doesn't he have some kind of preference?"

"Well, knowing Sheldon, he'd either name them after superheroes or sci fi characters. Since, I don't want them to be called Luke or Leia, they'd probably have superhero names." She tapped a finger on her chin as she thought. "His favorite superheroes are  _the Flash_ , and  _Professor X._  There are two versions of  _the Flash_  that he likes, and that's  _Barry Allen_  and  _Wally West_ —but, I think he like Barry more so… Andrew Barry." Penny wrinkled her face in distaste and tried again. "Andrew Wally. Hmm, it doesn't sound nice. Andrew… Charles. Yes, that sounds nice!" She turned to her dad and sister. "What do you think of Andrew Charles?"

"The names of princes of England, but it will do," Barbara remarked as their dad nodded. "How about my niece, then?"

Penny glanced over to the bassinets where both of her children were sleeping and smiled at them. "If I'm going for a superhero theme, then I'll go with Madison Lois."

"Your favorite damsel in distress, right?" Her dad asked with a small smile, and Penny nearly cried at the thought that her dad remembered. Their relationship had really changed within the nearly nine months that she had been back home, and she couldn't thank the twins enough for being the ones to mend their broken relationship. Well, she really should be thank Sheldon for getting her pregnant with the twins, but she wasn't really going to do that. "I remember you constantly asking me to get you a  _Lois Lane_ costume when you were six and me and your mother not having a single clue who that was. You kept saying, she's my favorite damsel in distress and I'd love to be her! In the end, you went as  _Sleeping Beauty_."

They all laughed at the image of her as one of the Disney princesses before her dad spoke again. "Slugger, it's not that I'm interfering—but, I just couldn't help but wonder. Are you even planning on telling this Sheldon guy that he has kids?"

Penny's happiness died down and she sent her father a weak frown. "No, I'm not. Sheldon isn't a fan of children, so I doubt that he'd even care. Besides, I'd be ruining his life if I did. He's considered as one of the greatest minds of the century, and two kids he didn't even want would only drag him down. It would be wrong for me to force him to accept the twins, especially if would just see them as nuisances. The three of us will manage without him, anyway."

"I respect your decision, Pen," her dad sighed, grabbing an apple from the fruit basket Hank got her. "But remember, even if it won't be good for either of you, the twins deserve to know who their father is. It would be unfair if you don't give Sheldon a chance to know them, and the twins to meet him. One or both of them will get hurt."

She wanted to ignore her dad's advice, but he was right. Sheldon deserved to know, and the twins deserved to meet him. Though she felt bad, she forced herself to ignore it.

Three days later, Leonard arrived with various IDs claiming that he was Sheldon Cooper.

* * *

**March 2011.**

* * *

"This praying mantis looking man right here," Penny tapped a finger at the middle of the photo, "is your daddy. Can you say daddy?"

Maddie laughed happily while Andy cooed in response. The twins were seated on her lap as she flipped through an album that mainly consisted of all the pictures she took during her stay in 4B. "Of course, you can't say daddy yet. But, I'm sure that you'll be saying your first word in no time," she planted a kiss on each of their heads then flipped to the next page. "See that? That's your daddy trying to blow up Uncle Leonard's head. Remember Uncle Leonard?"

The twins started babbling, probably remembering the name from somewhere.

"I'm guessing that you do. Wow, I'm having this odd feeling that the two of you are going to be super smart. You should know that you didn't get that form me, okay?"

"Penny, I have to tell you something!" Barbara excitedly said as she sprinted into the living room where the blondes were. "There's some guy on the phone looking for you, he says that he's a casting director from something called halfway there?"

The younger blonde's green eyes widened, and had the twins not been sitting on her lap, she might have bolted up from the couch. She gently lifted the twins and transferred them to the play yard that was at the side of the couch. "You two play nicely, okay?" They stared at her. "Mommy's just going to check if something big is going to happen." A second later, they directed their attention to the turning mobile above them, as if they understood what their mother had just said.

"God, they're smart," Barbara muttered, "now, come on. I doubt that they'd wait forever." She followed her sister into the kitchen where the phone was face down against the counter. Taking a deep breath, Penny pressed the loudspeaker and lifted the phone. "Hello, this is Penny speaking. Who am I speaking to?"

_"Penny, finally! I'm not sure if you remember me, but I'm the casting director at that horribly ended audition you went to. Do you remember me?"_

Of course, she did, especially if this call was for what she thought it was for. God, if this was really happening—then, she was  _soooo_  thankful that her body returned to its former shape before she got pregnant. She was afraid that she would no longer be able to revert to her former body, but it didn't take long before she did. Well, she also had to thank the daily morning run she did, but thankful, nonetheless. "Yes, I do. The only ones I tried to forget were those old men. So… what's up?

" _Well, let me start off by saying that due to some disagreements, those men you tried to forget left the show_." Penny paled, instantly thinking that she was the reason why the men left.  _"But, the good news is that management brought in new executive producers, and now the show is back on the original road it was supposed to walk on! Now, the reason why I'm calling is because we were wondering if you're still interested in the role of Jane."_

"Oh, I am! When all of you clapped and cheered, I seriously thought that I got the ro—" Penny paused, a dark thought filling her mind. "Uh, wait, is this real, or is this just a trick of some sort? Like for pornography or something?" There was a short mumbling sound and Penny regretted getting her hopes up. She shouldn't even have went further into the call—she had a strong feeling that this was just some sort of cruel joke. They weren't even sure if this was really the casting director, or just one of the staff that got her personal information to prank. It was depressing to think about, but it wasn't impossible. It had been nearly a year since the auditions, and it seemed improbable that they would still be casting the characters after a year. This was definitely just a practical joke; she was so stupid.

Right as she was about to hang up, a deep, sophisticated yet jolly voice that kind of reminded them of Santa Clause started talking.  _"Good afternoon, this is Clarence Fleming, creator, writer, director and main executive producer of Halfway There."_

Penny froze and turned to Barbara who had the same startled expression. They knew who Clarence Fleming was; he was a world renowned director that directed many blockbuster and award winning movies. He was considered as one of the greatest directors of their generation, and was known for his unique, yet powerful movies that normally raked in various awards for its quality.

 _"I'm calling because I saw your audition tape and was very impressed with how you acted and because one of the actors strongly recommended you."_ Whoever that actor was, Penny would thank him/her with all of her heart.  _"If you are interested, I will make arrangements for you to fly here so that we can discuss your contract. Are you okay with this?"_

Penny nearly dropped the phone as she realized what this meant. "Uh, yes! I'd be more than happy to fly in to discuss the role!"

_"Wonderful! I will email the tickets to you—as a proof of how serious we are that we want you to play Jane—and I look forward to working with you. Farewell."_

The next thing Penny knew, she and Barbara were on a plane to California.

"For some odd reason, I still think that this isn't happening," Barbara commented as they followed a production assistant into the studio. "My sister is going to be a star."

Penny chuckled, sending a text to their dad asking how the twins were doing. Her new manager—Mr. Fleming suggested that she get a new one, as he was confident that she would become a star—was already at the studios, and they were going to meet there. "I'm not going to get my hopes up, but this is real, sis." They entered a long hall before stopping in front of a room. "Is this the place?" The woman nodded and opened the door for them.

"Ah, so you really would show up," a familiar voice said, "I told you, Mr. Fleming, she'd be perfect for the role."

"Bailey?!" Penny gaped, staring at the dark haired woman that was walking towards her with a smile. "You're the one who recommended me?"

The dark haired woman shrugged and Penny pulled her in for a hug. Bailey used to work at the Cheesecake Factory with her during her first year in California. She and the snarky former waitress used to be close friends before Bailey left for work. They used to be partners in crime at the restaurant; they mixed alcohol into the other waiters' drinks, messed with the others' tables, took other people's tips and various other bad things that they would probably laugh about, now. When Bailey left, she was in the middle of her breakup with Kurt and had just moved into 4B and hadn't had a chance to contact her. Which was why she was moved to tears when she found out that it was her who had recommended that she get the lead role.

"What the hell happened to you, Snarky?" Penny asked as Bailey handed her a handkerchief to wipe her tears on. Even after three years, Bailey still had an affinity for dark colored wardrobe.

"I got a role on a Broadway play, and that's where I worked for two years before Mr. Fleming discovered me." The jolly old man behind her waved. "He casted me in 'Conclave' after he got impressed with my acting. And since I was so great, he gave me the role of Katie, your show best friend. Sad thing was, we had the worst executive producers in the face of the planet. A few months ago, Mr. Fleming canned them, remade the show, and here we are now."

The jolly old man—who seriously looked like a thinner, younger Santa Claus—walked up to them and grinned. "Bailey and the audition tape are enough to tell me that you are perfect for the role of Jane. If you'll accept, this will be your contract," her new manager bolted from the table and handed her a stack of bonded papers. "If you have any disagreements, just say so and we'll do something about it. Then, when you're set, let's try a test run to check your chemistry between you, Bailey and Gregg, okay?"

Penny looked at Barbara who was starstruck at the sight of the director then turned to the happy man. "What if the three of don't work?"

"Then, team building exercises!" He said with a chuckle. "The three of you are the exact people I'm looking for in this show, and I'm not letting any of you go."

"Okay," she said to her new manager who looked a bit like Bernadette, except with reddish-brown hair. "Let's sign."

Two days later, Penny actually  _read_  her contract and almost fainted at how big her paycheck was, and at the deal that if the show gets more seasons, her salary would get even  _bigger_. She also discovered that she and Bailey were working with Gregory Wilkes, the former star of  _Lies and a Truth_ and a very, very famous man. Their test runs were perfect, and soon enough, she and Barbara found an apartment and flew back to Nebraska to get the twins and their things.

One day, while she was walking around the mall, something caught her eyes that she knew would be perfect for the twins.

Side by side were a classic Winnie the Pooh doll, and an actual Woody the Cowboy doll.

* * *

**October 2011.**

* * *

Sometimes, Penny wondered if—like the recurring theme in her show—things really happened for a reason.

Halfway There had premiered a month ago, and was met by universal acclaim and skyrocketing ratings. None of them really expected it to become so successful, especially as it was stuck in development hell for a whole year, and thought they'd get cancelled after the pilot. But, everything went opposite as they thought, and there were already talks of renewing the show for four more seasons—and they had yet to air their  _fifth_  episode. The past two months were crazy with filming, and everything got crazier when the show started, and she became the newest 'it girl' of Hollywood. It was something about how she changed the dynamics with her being a single mother, and now she was constantly chased by paparazzi. Which was totally awesome, until you get tired of trying to ignore them when you're out with your friends.

She really didn't really expect the show to make her famous overnight, but, she was really grateful for everything that was happening. She already had three movies lined up for her to do; a comedy movie called Four Rules to Live By about four strangers who meet on a bus and decide to become friends, an animated film called Super Secret Ninja about a ninja—her—who accidentally gets recruited by the CIA and becomes a secret agent and a drama with  _James Franco_  called The Truth About Life that was about a scientist—also her!—who thinks she discovered a cure to a spreading disease when actually she was making it worse. Her manager was really awesome, and is she didn't tell her that she needed time to breathe, she would have even  _more_  movies lined up for her.

Today, she was sitting on the floor next to her eleven months old twins while her friends roamed around her apartment.

Maddie slowly got up, snatched the Woody doll from Andy and awkwardly toddled over to her mother. She handed her the doll and let out a squeal of mirth at Andy's obvious frustration with not being able to toddle as fast as her. For some unknown reason, the twins were oddly competitive. Especially Maddie. Must have got it from their father.

"I got all of that on tape!" Raj squealed—he took a sip of beer before deciding not to help with cooking—as he lifted the camera up. "Ooh, Andy's gonna get his doll back!"

Penny raised an eyebrow as Maddie sat herself on her lap while Andy toddled over to them, trying to retrieve the doll from his sister. "He always does. Maddie seems to enjoy taking it away from him."

Maddie lifted the doll away from him, causing Andy to frown and Penny swore that he was going to cry. He did something shocking, instead.

"Ah… ahd… ady!" Andy said, pointing to the doll as both Raj's and Penny's jaw dropped. "Ady!"

"ANDY'S SAYING HIS FIRST WORD!" Raj yelled, and a second later, Howard, Bernadette and Leonard appeared from the kitchen.

"What did you say, Andy?" Penny softly asked gently taking the doll from her daughter and handing it back to her son. "Were you saying Andy or Maddie?"

Andy blinked, looking down at the doll, then back up at her. "Daddy."

Of course he'd associate Woody with Sheldon! The first thing she told them when she bought the doll was that Woody was just like their daddy. It shouldn't have shocked her that he referred to a doll as their daddy. "Oh my god, you're speaking."

Maddie—probably unhappy with the turn of events—stood, snatched the doll back and handed it to her. "Mommy!"

Andy gasped, toddling back over to them and playing tug o war with his sister. "Daddy!"

"Are you getting it on tape?" Leonard snapped to Raj, "make sure that you're getting it on tape!"

"I've been filming for half an hour, now, of course I'm getting it on tape!" Raj answered, focusing the camera on the twins.

"The two of you are so noisy!" Howard hissed.

Penny felt Bernadette crouch beside her with a sad smile. "I really think you should tell him, Penny. The twins seem like they really want to meet their daddy who's supposedly in Switzerland."

Penny watched Andy hug the doll away from his sister and sighed, maybe, it was time to tell Sheldon about them.

* * *

**November 2011.**

* * *

_"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, happy birthdaay, happy birthday to you! Blow the candles!"_

Penny happily lifted the cakes and placed it on the highchairs for the twins to blow the candle. It was the twins' first birthday, and they were celebrating it back at her apartment since the twins were already tired from the birthday party that the Halfway There crew set up for them. It was hard to believe that a year had past since she had the twins, and that in just half a year, she had fulfilled her dreams of being an actual actress. And really, she was sure that none of this would happen if the twins never came into her life. So, yeah, special thank you to Sheldon, as well.

"Blow the candles," she said, bending down to watch as the twins each blew the number one candle on their respective cakes. They all clapped and she planted a kiss on their heads, "happy birthday, twins!"

Maddie turned to her brother, "happah badah, Andy!"

Andy nodded, grinning at her, "happah badah, Maddie!"

"Time for the gifts!" Raj announced, and the five of them shuffled around the living room. Raj lifted a big box that was wrapped in bright colors that caught the twins' attention. "This is my gift! It's something called the 'Laugh and Learn Learning Home' from  _Fisher Price_  and I thought that it was really cute."

"This one is from Howard and me," Mrs. Wolowitz said, lifting another big box, "Howard, what did you call this, again?"

Howard snatched the box from his mother and placed it in front of the twins' highchairs and smiled at Penny. "It's the 'Peek-A-Block' set thing that we saw. Mom got the 'Incrediblock' thing, too, even though it's practically the same!"

"If it was the same, it would have the same name, Howard!"

Bernadette pushed past the bickering mother and son and gave Penny a small smile, pushing another big box—her friends really went all out—towards them. "I actually bought my gift a few months back when I saw it. It's a 'Musical Lion Walker' which is practically useless cause they can already walk."

Penny grinned at her friend and hugged her, "it's not useless! The twins love anything with sounds, you know that. Thanks, Bernadette!"

Leonard appeared a moment later with a large box, his laptop and a smaller box. "Uh, sorry it took a while, I had to set something up." He pushed the smaller box first, "that's from me, it's a 'Rockin' Tunes Giraffe.' If you haven't noticed, we all bought our gifts at the same place and at the same time." The others grumbled, annoyed that Leonard had to reveal that. "And this—" he pushed the bigger box forward then placed his laptop on the table. "Is from Sheldon." He pushed a button and Sheldon appeared on the screen.

"Andy, Maddie, happy birthday. I'm sorry I haven't been around and that I couldn't attend your birthday party, but I've been very busy. But, do not worry, as I'll be visiting you soon. I love both of you very much."

Penny cringed each time that a part of the audio jumped; she wasn't a techie, but even she knew that the message was just cut up videos of Sheldon reading those faux scripts that Raj wrote. It was like those murder messages with the magazine and newspaper letter clippings, except robotic and in video.

"Daddy membah!" Andy happily said, turning to her sister who was grinning. "Membah bahdah!"

Maddie nodded, clapping her hands in delight that they finally got to see and talk to their father. "Bes' bahdah!"

"I don't know about you, but that video was horribly made." Mrs. Wolowitz said before patting her son's head. "Good job, Howie. You made these little babies very happy!"

"There are, uh, from Sheldon." Leonard said, gesturing to the two big boxes. They're twin strollers—cause the twins are getting bigger and it just seems more efficient. Happy birthday from your daddy, twins."

Penny smiled sadly as the twins asked Leonard to play the video again, saying that they want to see their daddy again. Even if she didn't want to, she had to tell Sheldon, one day.

* * *

It was a cold Thursday afternoon when Penny decided to take a break from shooting  _The Truth About Life_  with (the amazing) James Franco, and take a stroll around the street filled with restaurants.

The twins were at the Wolowitzes while she shot the movie, and they didn't have to come to work at the studios since they were still on Christmas hiatus. She still hadn't asked Leonard to tell Sheldon, but she was seriously thinking of finally telling him. Ever since their first birthday party, the twins had grown more and more curious about their father. She normally lied—she hated the word but it was the truth—that he was just really busy trying to make progress with his research in Switzerland. Even though, she knew that he was just two cities away from them. Raj even volunteered to make more of the videos, but she told him that it would only be making it worse.

It was an internal debate, but she decided that she needed time to think about it.

She was eating her meatball sub while being dressed in—what may be—the greatest disguise ever when she heard an incredibly familiar voice.

"—I agree. However, how are you so sure of this theory of yours?"

"Isn't it obvious? Our IQs are the only ones compatible enough for it."

Curious, she fixed her disguise—hat, black hair wig, large expensive sunglasses—and crept towards the familiar voice because speak of the devil. There, at the other side of the restaurant was  _Sheldon_ and a brunette that she never heard of. Was she her girlfriend or something? Leonard nor the other never mentioned anything about Sheldon having a lady friend. Ever. All they talked about was how he was really making great progress in his work and that he was being deemed the 'Rockstar of Science' because of his greatness. Howard even said that if things went well, he might prove String Theory, which was really impressive. And more of a reason why she and the twins would only be ruining his life.

"Alright, explain." Sheldon said to his friend. She noticed that he hadn't changed much in the year that passed; his hair was still nearly kept—though, a bit longer—he was still wearing the colorful shirts over a long sleeved shirt and chinos outfit that he'd been wearing since he was like… five, and he still brought himself like he was better than the rest of the world. Which, he probably might, but that would be inflating his ego. The only thing that kind of changed was that he was a bit thicker than the last time she saw him—which was actually good, cause he didn't look as sickly as he used to. He actually looked nice.

"Between the two of us, our genetic material has the potential of producing the first in a line of intellectually superior benign overlords to guide humanity to a brighter tomorrow." The woman monotonously said, earning a nod of agreement from Sheldon. "Since I know of your dislike of physical contact, we may do it via in vitro fertilization. What do you think?"

"Interesting," Sheldon hummed in thought, "I have no objections to it. Our child will not only be intelligent but superior enough to rule the world."

Penny nearly dropped her delicious sub at what Sheldon said. He was going to have a baby with someone, which meant that they were probably going out. If she told Sheldon about the twins, that might ruin his chance of having a real relationship with someone—and she didn't want that. The twins would only cause problems between Sheldon and his girlfriend, and that would only cause him to hate her even more. She would  _really_  be ruining his life if she told him. And even if he did agree to, like, become a father to them, she knew it in her gut that he would be one of those dads that are never there and just give financial support—which she really  _does not_ need with how  _high_  her manager negotiated her salary for her new movie—that always happened in television.

He probably wouldn't even love the twins as much he would love the first in the line of really smart dictators or something. He probably wouldn't even love the twins if they weren't smart—not that they weren't, they were incredibly smart even without his help. They were managing without him, and she was sure that she'd be able to raise them all on her own. Then, Sheldon could go on his merry way to get a Nobel and have kids via in vitro or something. She could be a single mother—she  _was_  one—slash award winning actress, too. The twins didn't need a father who wouldn't love them, or would walk out of their lives. They needed someone who would stay, and would love them as much as she loved them. Having a kid just for the sake of them being smart was not okay in her book, and never would be.

So, she made up her mind that her lie of telling Sheldon would only be ruining his life was true. Sheldon didn't need to know, and would never find out about the twins.

Little did she know that she would change her mind, five months later, when she needed to fly to France to shoot her new movie.

* * *

 **Present;**  October 2012.

* * *

"—and that's the twins saying their first word."

Sheldon nodded silently as Penny played the video of the twins fighting over the doll, and Andy associating the doll with him. They were currently in Penny's living room, watching the many home videos that Raj filmed while Leonard transferred all of the twins' belongings that were in their apartment to their room. He didn't know how much he missed in his proge—children's lives until Penny offered to show him the videos. He would have even cried if he was as emotional as Leonard and Raj, but since he was much more evolved than them, he just found himself at a loss for words.

"None of us really expected them to talk, but they did." Penny said with motherly pride dripping off the tone of her voice. He really couldn't judge her, though, he was equally as proud. "They're really smart babies, you know. Most of the people who meet them think that they're about two times or three times their age—especially with how big they are—and they're always surprised when I tell them that they were just a year old. You should be proud."

He nodded, licking his lips as he tore his attention away from the cacophony of his friends fighting over the angle of the video. "I am very proud of them. They are more intellectually advanced than the four year olds in their daycare. They also have amazing analytical and problem solving skills. Have you seen them play with puzzles or play Tetris?"

Penny laughed softly beside him, "yeah, they're amazing. They can also play chess, too." Sheldon raised an eyebrow at her in surprise. "Raj thought that it would be great to teach them at an early age, and they're amazing! They even beat Leonard and Howard!"

Sheldon smugly grinned, noticing that Andy had stopped playing and was making his way towards them. "Of course! No child of mine is ever too advanced in anything." He felt Andy place something on his lap and looked down to see the Woody doll. "Hello."

Andy pulled a string at the back of the doll and it spoke.  _"Howdy, partner!"_

"Your doll speaks?" He asked in bemusement as Andy clambered up to sit in between the two of them. The toddler nodded then tapped a finger on his chest, "Andy is Andy," then he tapped a finger on Sheldon's chest, "Daddy, you Woody. Andy yoh pahtnah!"

"Penny, why is he associating me with a cartoon character?" He asked, turning to Penny who was suppressing a laugh. "Well, I told them that you look like Woody. Cause you have a big head, brown hair and are a real cowboy!"

Sheldon shook his head; he didn't understand what was funny about it. "Alright,  _partner_ ," he said the latter with difficulty, but eased up when he saw Andy happily smiling up at him. "Why don't you go play with your sister while your mother and I discuss something?"

"Okay, daddy!" Andy slid off the couch—but, not before grabbing the doll—and scurried back to where Maddie was playing with a dollhouse that was even bigger than her. Penny had added a play area in her living room for the twins where a lot of their toys were. There were four (Barbie) dollhouse complete with people; train and race tracks with actual moving vehicles, an entire toy box filled with Legos and boxes and boxes of various toys. Those were just for the play area, and the ones in their room was different than the ones here. It seemed a bit much, but he was glad that his children never felt deprived of anything.

"Penny, I've been meaning to ask this question ever since I confronted Leonard about the twins." The blonde nodded, urging him to continue. "Is there another reason why you didn't want to tell me about the twins?"

Sheldon watched as Penny's eyebrows rose, her eyes widening slightly before furrowing her eyebrows. "Well, like I told you before; it really was because I didn't want to ruin your life. I didn't think that you liked kids—and that you would even believe me—so, I just decided not to bother you. That's really it," she admitted with a small chuckle. "I'm sorry for having such a lame excuse. If I had told you before, you might not get all the success you have, now."

He stared at her and noticed that she was avoiding his gaze. That meant that she was hiding something from him—which was obvious with how horrible her excuse was. He had a strong feeling that there was more to this than Penny was letting on, and that she probably would never tell him about it. Still, it made him curious of what Penny's  _real_  reason of not telling him was. He refused to believe that Penny wouldn't telling him because of all the progress he made in physics—that had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that he had children living somewhere. He wasn't sure if either of the guys knew, but he had a strong urge to find out. He wouldn't be contented until he got all of the answers he needed. "There is little to no possibility that I wouldn't get the success I'm having now if I knew of the twins, Penny. I'd still be the same brilliant man, except for the fact that I'd be a father as well."

She sighed, "that's why I'm really sorry for never telling you. But, I'm really glad that you didn't run away like I thought you would." Sheldon sent her a look of dissatisfaction and she smiled up at him. "Aw, lighten up. We all make mistakes, and it was really wrong for me to not tell you. But, you forgive me, right?"

Sheldon narrowed his eyes at her, causing Penny to laugh. Maybe, she really was insane. "You gotta forgive me! I gave you those two adorable kids! Do you think that they'd be that cute if I wasn't their mother?"

Yes, because physical appearance mattered so much to him. Note the sarcasm. He was definitely going to have to get her checked, if she wished to linger close to him. "Penny, I hardly care about what my progeny look like, and you know it. You will obtain forgiveness once you take my online classes for all of your impending strikes." Penny pouted at him—as if she thought that doing so would make him change his mind—and groaned when she finally realized that it wasn't working. "Fine, but only because I value our friendship!"

"Also, it has come to my attention that the twins call me daddy. I have decided that they really do not have the need to call me that—they can simply call me Sheldon if they want. So, that when you remarry, they will not be confused on who their father is."

Penny laughed at him—again—and gave him a light smack on the arm. "What are you talking about? You're the only father they're ever going to acknowledge and know, silly. So, just sit back and enjoy it before they call you pops, or something." Sheldon was about to respond, but was cut off by someone's footsteps getting louder.

"Hey Sheldon," Leonard called, entering the living room. "I've finished moving all of the twins' things to their room. Are you ready to go?"

Sheldon nodded, standing from the sectional and placing the CDs of the twins that Penny copied for him in his bag. "Yes, I am. Penny, twins, it seems that it's time for us to leave."

Maddie—comprehending what her father just said—quickly stood from her spot in front of her Barbie dollhouse and rushed towards the adults that stood around the couch. "Daddy gonna go?!" She exclaimed with confused blue eyes. "Daddy not gonna stay hewe?"

Andy stood beside her and frowned up at the adults; his greenish-blue eyes starting to tear up. "What! Daddy no seep hewe? Why? Daddy no want us?"

Penny's heart broke, Leonard wanted to tell them that they'd stay and Sheldon bent down to face them. Someone had to explain things to them, and who better than him? "It is not that I don't want you, I am only going to live in a different house, but, I will visit both of you as much as I can." The toddlers both started to sniffle, and Sheldon gave them an awkward hug. "There is no need to cry, as I promise to pick you up from daycare everyday as your mother and I agreed to do. Then, if your mother permits, you may stay over at our apartment like you had for two months, now."

"Daddy no fohget us, again?" Maddie asked, sniffing as she wiped her tears on her arm.

"No, I'm not going to forget about you, again, nor will I be going to Switzerland for some unknown reason. I will just be in our apartment while you stay with your mother. This house is too spacious for one person, alone." He patted their heads before standing up and smiling softly down at them. "You two behave for your mother, okay?" The twins nodded as they sobbed, and the three of them made their way towards the front of the house.

Before Sheldon stepped out, he stopped and turned to face Penny. "I seemed to have forgotten to tell you something," he grumbled as the blonde stared at him. "That email with no subject you received was not meant to be sent, and was only created as a means of catharsis. I did not intend to hurt you by it—nor that you see it—and I deeply apologize for hurting your feelings with it." He gave her a sad smile then got into Leonard's car and went home.

In reality, the email that hurt Penny was actually meant to express how much he had missed her presence in all of their lives. It was Raj who suggested that he try telling Penny that he considered her as a close friend, and he thought that it might have changed Penny's mind and make her come back to fix Leonard. Had his roommate not arrived home, drunk and miserable about Penny's departure, he would have been able to finish the message properly, and she would have seen what it was supposed to convey. That he missed her and their friendship much more than he let on.

Regardless, he decided that there was no need for Penny to know about that.


	14. Confident Suits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Second Chancellor's Award.

Penny often wondered if 2311 North Los Robles' building manager was really just busy with whatever he did in his spare time, or he just  _really_  hated everyone who lived in the building in general.

Cause really, how hard was it to get a stupid elevator fixed, or checked, even?! Seriously!

Nevertheless, she had no choice but to use the stairs—like she had been doing since she first moved in. It was a good thing that her new house only had two stories, or else she'd definitely install an elevator, even a manual elevator if it meant that she didn't have to climb four flights of stairs while carrying one of her twins, their overnight duffel bag and help Andy climb it without stumbling because he—for some odd reason—did not like being carried. Since there really was no other way of getting up to 4A; she slung the duffel bag on one shoulder, hoisted Maddie on her hip, held Andy's hand and guided all three of them up the stairs—all at once! Multitasking was something she learned a little after she had the twins, and she was a bit surprised with how good she was getting at it.

She had to finish a bunch of errands in exactly an hour and a half, because if she didn't, Sheldon would eat her alive. Now that they were doing the whole 'co parents' thing, they (she) had agreed to split the twins' time with them. Weekdays were for her, and weekends were for him. She would be the one to drop off the twins at the daycare—the entire Halfway There crew mourned over the fact that the twins would no longer be staying at their makeshift daycare—since she passed by it on the way to the studios; then the guys would be the one to pick them up since they got out of work earlier than her and then she'd pick them up on her way back home. Holidays were to be discussed, and the twins would also stay over whenever she was out of town or really busy. This was the first time that they'd try it, and she really hoped that it would work. She didn't want anything close to  _Kramer vs Kramer_  happening.

Today, she was dropping off the twins at the guys' apartment cause it was a Friday and Fridays were included in their definition of weekends. Well, Friday nights were included, but since Gregg and Bailey demanded that they sleep over at her new house; she decided to bring them over early. The twins seemed like they really missed Sheldon, even though they still saw each other everyday. She guessed that it was because they were together for two whole months, and they were no longer used to him not being there. They talked about him nonstop and constantly asked her why he couldn't just live with them since they had such a big house and everyone in the entire planet could fit. Not wanting to hurt them, she told them that Sheldon was just really busy with work and that it was more efficient for him to stay at the apartment than with them.

Which was a total lie, because her house was just three houses down from the Caltech campus. Literally. It was about a ten minute walk from her house to the parking lot where she often dropped him off at. 1466 San Pasqual st. go ahead, google it. Regardless, she could (absolutely) not tell them that she and their father had no relationship—other than platonic—whatsoever between them, and that there was a low chance of all of them living under the same roof. It was mainly because her relationship with him was still… she couldn't even find a right word to describe it. He was always distracted, and looked like he was in his own world. He would be staring into space with a frustrated look on his face, and he would barely notice it if someone talked to him. She didn't notice it until two days ago, but when she did, she couldn't help but wonder if it was because of her.

She tried asking Leonard why his roommate was acting that way, all he said was that Sheldon was being bothered by something and that it had nothing to do with her. Which, she didn't believe because he was acting so distant—but! Since she was no quitter—no siree, she was not—she would still try to reach out to Dr. Genius (as Bailey dubbed him) because she had gone this far, and there was no backing out. If she was a soldier on the battlefield and Sheldon was the enemy that really wasn't and all she needed was to befriend him; the first thing she'd yell was 'for the twins!' Because really, the twins were the one who really needed him, and she didn't want to put him out of their lives now that he had entered it. She would be horrible if she did, and she already saw how happy the twins were when they were with Sheldon.

Nothing was more important to her than her children's happiness.

She shook herself out of her thoughts as she placed Maddie on her feet and noticed that the door was unlocked. She really had to remind them to double check the locks if they didn't want something like the Bozeman move—as they called it—happening again. She'd have problems with the twins' living arrangements if he moved somewhere that wasn't in the LA county or in California in general. The twins would be getting those million miles achievement before they turned ten, if he did. With a slight shake of her head, she pushed the door open and stepped inside. "Guys? We're here."

She closed the door behind her as the twins scurried over to their toy filled playpen before looking up to see Sheldon staring at a whiteboard full of odd symbols with Leonard standing right beside him. She quietly placed the twins' bag at the side of the couch then noticed something very,  _very_  wrong with Sheldon; he was wearing only one layer of clothes and it wasn't one of his graphic shirts. Instead, he was wearing a simple gray and white raglan shirt without any kind of shirt over it. His hair was slightly disheveled—a few stands hanging over his forehead and some sticking up at every direction—he had a troubled look on his face, and had she not knew him; she would have thought that he had just gotten home from an awkward one night stand and was getting confronted by his roommate about it.

Not that the great Dr. Sheldon Cooper did one night stands—it was best not to drag her into this—he just seriously looked like he had gotten drunk, fooled around, woke up, left and was now hungover. Again, she had nothing to do with this. "Hello, anybody home? You guys, okay?"

Leonard turned his head to face her, his eyebrows slightly raising in surprise, then nudged his silent roommate. "Sheldon, snap out of it. Penny and the twins are already here."

Sheldon barely paid attention to Leonard and scribbled another set of symbols on a free space on his whiteboard. "This can't be happening, again… this should not be happening, again."

Penny furrowed her eyebrows and took a step closer to him. He looked like he was so distraught that he forgot to check his appearance in the mirror before he left for work; which was troubling, because this was  _Sheldon_ —and he was the most hygienic person she knew. He didn't even smell like baby powder or his Luke Skywalker shampoo that smelled a bit like citrus; he kind of smelled stinky in Sheldon standards. He even had this (extremely) light five o' clock shadow going on, and it actually didn't seem too bad. He was always clean cut, and his entire appearance didn't look so bad as it did. She had to admit; he actually look… good. But, Sheldon looking like this was not good. "Sheldon, sweetie, are you okay? Did Leonard do something to break you? Like whistling in front of him?"

The theoretical physicist's sky blue eyes sharply landed on her, and she noticed how his eyes weren't as bright as they used to be. They looked dull, as if he had been staying up all night thinking about something. "Penny, I am neither broken, nor can I be." He huffed and turned back to his whiteboard, breaking the eye contact. "I am simply contemplating about something that has absolutely nothing to do with you. Please, stop bothering me."

With a grumble, Penny sat herself on the middle of the couch. The twins were still busy messing with something at the playpen, and that meant that they would be pretty preoccupied until they got hungry for dinner. "Well, that sucked," she scooted over to his spot. Sheldon would immediately award her a strike if he saw her—but, he didn't really care right now. She wouldn't get in trouble—she already took four of those stupid classes of his during her breaks—with Sheldon all busy. "Any answers for me, Leonard?"

Leonard was at the kitchen, opening the fridge to get two water bottles before closing it and tossing it to her. His throwing skill was getting better, she noted. "Dr. Gablehauser called on Wednesday, informing us that Sheldon won this year's Chancellor's Award for Science." Penny's eyes widened in remembrance of what a Chancellor's Award was; what exactly happened that night, and she swore that Sheldon muttered 'oh god' or something like that. She didn't have volcano… vulcan (she remembered!) hearing like Sheldon did. Now, she understood why Sheldon was so distraught. It was bringing back bad memories. "The committee really didn't want him to win, but due to his current contribution to science, they had to. Their hesitation was mainly due to what happened two years, ago."

She suddenly felt a sharp pang of guilt as she glanced at Sheldon who was drawing lines and connecting the various symbols with each other. He seemed like he was in a different world, far away form where they really were. And she knew that he was troubled by everything that he didn't remember from that night. It was undeniable that the humiliation he received was because of her, and that it was one of the reasons why he held a grudge against her. Had she not suggested that he try drinking his fear away, none of this would have happened. The memories of that night—whichever he  _did_  remember—must have traumatized him big time if he was getting this distracted. He hadn't even gotten over his speech from when he was young, and now he had this to add on to his problems. If only she could buy him ice cream (after dinner, of course) to cheer him up like how she did with the twins.

If only she could go back in time to stop him from drinking all that alcohol.

If only it was  _that_  easy.

"The terms are still the same, he has to make a speech or else he'll forfeit the award. But, he's banned from drinking any type of alcohol during the ceremony, and they're going to check if he drank before the event." Leonard walked towards the beige armchair, and sighed. "He's been like this ever since Chancellor Morton reminded him that it was make a speech or else, and his mother told him to accept the award. Something about Jesus giving him another blessing, He's been restless ever since. It's kind of sad cause he really deserves this award."

"Can't we do anything to help him?" Penny asked softly, a small frown forming on her face. "Like reforming the C-Men, or something? There's got to be a way to help him."

"I wish we could, but you know Sheldon. And I know that you think that this is all your fault, but it's not. Sheldon just has stage fright and that's it, it has nothing to do with what happened that night."

Yeah right, she grumbled to herself. She might just believe that if Sheldon didn't look like his soul was ripped out of his body. She didn't want to help him just to make up for what happened before—kinda—but, she wanted to help as his friend. She wanted the two of them to have a good, strong friendship for the twins and for the salvation of her soul. The other day, she was checking her email when some sort of glitch happened, and she was transported to the cursed no subject email that Sheldon accidentally sent her. When she was pregnant, she read the email every time she hated herself. Now, she read it to remind herself that she had to make it up to Sheldon. Not meant to be sent or not, what he said in the message was right, and she did cause him a great deal of misery.

If only she could just find a way to get rid of his stage fright that didn't compose of forcing him to buy a suit or to drink. Her character (or the writers) would probably know a way of how to help him, but the only help she could think of was making a banner and putting 'Go Sheldon' on it like how they did during the games back in school. She had always been pretty confident her whole life, so she never had an instance where she got stage fright. Mr. Fleming once told them that having people you care about helped. If you didn't know anyone in the crowd—probably what happened to Sheldon during his valedictorian speech—you'd think that everyone was pressuring you, and that caused stage fright. But, if you had someone close to you that you could focus your attention on, then the chances of stage fright would lessen since you trust that person and that he or she wouldn't judge you like how strangers would.

That kind of worked for her, since the twins often watched their scenes and she always felt confident and comfortable whenever they did. There was just something about them that took all of her inner nervousness away.

Maybe, that would work with Sheldon…

"I know, I just really want to help him." She confessed as Sheldon pushed his sleeves up and wiped the writings on the whiteboard with his arm. "Sheldon, are you alright?"

Sheldon slowly turned to face them, his expression still unreadable and distant. "I have decided to reject the award." His narrowed gaze fell on her, sitting on his spot, and he frowned. "I am most  _definitely_  not going to accept the award. Penny, you're in my spot. Move."

Leonard hissed from the couch, sending his roommate a dirty look. "You're being rude, Sheldon."

"Am I?" The theoretical physicist asked in monotone, taking a seat on his spot after the blonde scooted over. "I haven't noticed. What I have noticed, is that there is no possible outcome of me not getting humiliated, again. Thus, I came up with the conclusion of simply not accepting the award. I won it once, I don't need to win it, again. Especially as we all know that I am  _very_  close to winning the Nobel. That's the only reason they're honoring me, because they want to be able to say that they saw my life changing contributions before the Nobel committee saw it. Regardless, that no longer matters as I no longer feel the need to accept it." He raised an eyebrow at Penny who was gaping at him and looked around. "Where are the twins?"

"They're at the playpen," Penny said as Sheldon looked over the couch to see the blonde toddlers playing with the three hundred piece puzzle he bought them. She saw him absentmindedly smile at the twins, and she wondered if the twins could be the answer she was looking for. "Hey, Sheldon, are you alright?"

Sheldon snorted as he returned back to his seat and stared down at the black and red smudges on the back of his arm. "I am quite fine. I was merely distracted by a seemingly unsolvable problem." He grabbed a container filled with wet wipes and started cleaning his arm. "Now, that I have found a plausible conclusion, my mind may now cool down. I do not need that award anyway, that award is nothing compared to what I'm about to get."

"Sheldon, an award is an award. You shouldn't reject it just because you can't make a speech," Leonard chastised from his chair. "Look at Penny! She wasn't even here in California when she won the Emmy, but she still accepted it. Speech or not."

"Leonard, you seem to have not paid attention to what happened. Penny won, and the director accepted the award, as well as read the speech she made for her." Sheldon corrected, sending a knowing look to Leonard. "If you're going to oppose me, at least get your facts straight. Besides, Chancellor Morton made it clear that you cannot read my speech for me, and that I cannot do it via VTR. I've already double checked any possible ways of me not having to stand in front of an audience enough to trample me, and there is none. Therefore, I shall not accept the award." He glanced at Penny, who looked as if she had something to tell him. "It's only logical. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must order our dinner. Keep quiet."

Penny frowned as Sheldon took the phone and started dialing Schezuan Palace's number. She was definitely going to intervene with this little problem of his—it was the least she can do.

* * *

"So, I was reading  _A Dance with Dragons_  the other day—cause I really can't wait for the show—and I decided that Danaerys should really get the throne." Penny said, grabbing a napkin and wiping Maddie's sauce smeared mouth with it. "But, her choices have really been pissing me off, and now I think that she'll never sail back to Westeros like what she's supposed to do."

Leonard chuckled, "I originally wanted Robb as king, but now that he's dead, I'm going for Jon. Dany is too happy as Mhysa to go back and claim the throne, she's already lost all of her soldiers—she'll never get back. Everyone else thinks she's dead, anyway. Plus, her nephew is alive, she has no claim, anymore."

Penny scrunched her face up in distaste, "Leonard! You could have at least warned me about that. I'm not at that part, yet—I only read the Danaerys parts; no one else's."

Andy turned to his twin sister who was eating messily, "Maddie, wat a dah-nah-is? Is dat food?"

Maddie shrugged nonchalantly, grabbing a dumpling and biting down on it. She had no time for her brother's silly questions. "Dunno."

"—shouldn't just read her parts. You have to read the entire book to understand what's happening around her." Leonard continued, waving his chopsticks in the air as he explained. "If you only read her parts, you'll never understand what else is going on. You won't see how her, Tyrion and Arya are all close to each other. You'll have zero knowledge about the white walkers, and why Jon deserves to be the king." Leonard shook his head as Penny mumbled about how hot Jon Snow was and took the second to the last dumpling. "I actually think that Danaerys and Jon will meet cause he needs the firepower, and when he defeats the white walkers, he'll be king. I'd like to believe that he's a Targaryen, as well."

"What? No way! He's not going to be king, Danaerys is—a queen that is." Penny stated before turning to the man sitting beside her. "What do you think Sheldon? Who should sit on the iron throne?"

Penny frowned as the man who always had something to say quietly nodded, pushing a piece of chicken around in his container with his chopstick. Ever since the odd discussion they had about an hour back, he had been nothing but silent. After he ordered the food, he simply told her and Leonard to pick the food up. Then, when she said that she would pay for it, he didn't have a snide comment that was related to her mooching off of them for years. He just shrugged and returned to writing odd things on his whiteboard. Which—if you knew Sheldon as much as she did—was totally causing warning signals to go off at the back of her mind. This was so un-Sheldon like that she was getting really worried about him. The last time he was even close to how he was now was when he got stuck on that problem and worked at the Cheesecake Factory.

"I am going to retire, now," Sheldon announced, standing up before dumping his container into the trash can. He stared at it for another second before turning to see four pairs of eyes staring up at him. "Please, do not bother me. Goodnight." He curtly nodded then walked off to his room.

"Is daddy, okay?" Andy asked with concern. "He no wook okay."

Maddie nodded in agreement, pointing to the container filled with dumpling at the middle of the table. "He no get da wast dumpwing."

"I'm going to talk to him," Penny announced, placing her container on the coffee table before standing up. "This has been bothering me ever since we arrived."

Leonard sighed, taking his and her's containers and dumping them in the trash. "I don't know if there's anything you can say that will cheer him up. Unless you're going to introduce either William Shatner or Leonard Nimoy to him?"

"No, I'm not—but, I'm working on that. I know that this is about what happened two years, ago, and that the only person who can fix this is me." She gave him a stern look and he shook his head, "wish me luck, Leonard." She heard Leonard mutter something inaudible and chose to ignore it before making her way down the hall to Sheldon's room. Luckily, the door was unlocked and she let herself in.

Sheldon was lying down on his bed with his back to her. It oddly reminded her of when she tried talking to him after he found out that Leonard messed his experiment up on purpose just so he could see her again. It was sweet but stupid at the same time, and she bet that her from then would have laughed if she knew that she would have kids with Sheldon. She might even die from laughter if it was then; now, it was reality and she had to help him before this got worse. Though… it was kind of funny how everything happened. She had always thought that it was Leonard who she would settle and have kids with. Apparently, what she really got was just the having kids part because there probably was no way that she'd get—

"Penny," he lifelessly called, and Penny briefly wondered if this was the Sheldon they knew and loved. His superior-than-you tone was nowhere to be found, and was replaced by a soulless automaton. Like Wall-E, except without love. "People can't be in my room. Please leave."

"I've been in here before on more than one occasion, sweetie," she said as she closed the door behind her. This was actually the first time she entered his room since—well, two years. "But, cause I don't want anymore strikes, I'll cut to the chase." She took a seat on the edge of his bed and he simply ignored her. "Am I the reason why you don't want to accept the award? Cause I got you drunk enough to humiliate you, and—I don't want to bring this up, but I have to—got you to have sex with me?" She saw him wince and wondered if she was supposed to be offended by that reaction. That topic was now filed under 'taboo.'

"Not everything is about you, Penny," he snarled, sounding like the Sheldon she knew. Regardless of the slight joy she felt that he was back to hissing about her again, she was kind of annoyed with his comment. But, she'd ignore it for now. "I am still not comfortable talking in front of a big crowd, and with the dastardly alcohol out of the question, I have no idea of how to deal with this problem. I can still perfectly picture the afternoon of my valedictory speech—mainly due to my eidetic memory—and how terrified I was before I fainted. However horrible that is, I am fortunate that I cannot remember majority of the embarrassment I experienced during the awarding one year, six months and three weeks ago. I would lose my mind if I was able to recall  _every single_  part of that night."

Of course that didn't seem as much of a slap to the face as it seemed. She may have not wanted things to happen the way it did, but she never thought that it would sound so… bad when someone else talked about it. Time to move on. "You know, people didn't trample you the first time, and the only way they will is if you insult everyone, again. Without alcohol, I don't think you'll make a fool of yourself, sweetie."

"Don't be preposterous, Penny," he snapped, his gaze still fixated on the wall opposite him. Well, he might have his eyes closed, but she had a hunch that he was just staring at the wall. "Without alcohol, I'll pass out and I'll make a fool out of myself once more. I told you; there is no possible scenario that will end without me embarrassing myself. It's inevitable."

"What's with the pessimistic attitude? How are you even going to accept the Nobel if you can't even get pass a simple awarding ceremony?" He turned to face her and she smile. "I mean, think about it; you're going to have to make an acceptance speech when you win, and tons more after that. Then, you'll be invited to speak in front of thousands of people all the time—you can't faint each time! You're going to have to man up and show them why you won. Because you're the rockstar of science, and cause you did what no one else did. Now, that's something to be proud of." Her smile widened as she noticed that he was contemplating what she said. "I'm sure that this time, things won't be as bad as it was last time. Don't make the committee give the award to Kripke—or worse—Leslie Winkle!"

Sheldon stared at her for another moment then turned away from her and sighed.

"Fine. I'll go."

* * *

There were two things that Sheldon noticed ever since Penny returned from her trip. The first one was that the apartment felt extremely lonely with the twins living with her again. He had gotten to accustomed to their babbling; their arguments, their yelling and their crying that he no longer knew what the meaning of 'peace and quiet' was. To him, it was confining himself in his room while the twins terrorized the other half of their apartment with whatever was their toy of the day. It was also the time when the twins were already fast asleep, and he could hear himself think without them trying to talk to him about what the annoying letter of the day was. He knew that Leonard felt it, too, and they were both secretly glad that Penny agreed that they be the ones to pick them up from daycare while she was at work. The hour and half wasn't much, but it was enough.

The second thing he noticed was that Penny was exerting a lot of effort in trying to befriend him, again. Not that they weren't friends—he was not lying when he said that they were—he just found her presence a bit too… unusual. Sure, he was used to seeing her everyday with her living across from them, but that was two years ago. A lot had changed and he didn't even bother to check if someone was living in her old apartment since he chased off most of the people who were interested. He was just not used to her being all friendly to him again, and especially with all the meddling she had been doing. It had only been less than a day since she dropped the twins off at their apartment, yet she had spent practically the entire time annoying with texts that told him to get the award. Had he not needed her number in case of emergencies, he would have already blocked her number.

In all honesty, he was unsure of what her little pep talk actually did to change his mind. He was still fifty-fifty on whether or not he should accept the award, and the constant thinking was getting more and more frustrating with each minute that passed. A part of him didn't want to expose himself to any more embarrassment that would never be taken off Youtube and the humiliation that he would get from everyone in the audience. He had enough of that in one lifetime. While another part of him agreed with Penny that he was being a coward, and it would be pathetic if a future Nobel laureate couldn't even give a lousy speech. Penny was right; when he won the Nobel, he was going to have to deliver a lot of speeches in front of four times the amount of people that could trample him. Every speech he would make would go down in history, and would be used in various future inspirational speeches.

"—dude, you'd be crazy not to accept the award!" Raj said, moving his yellow piece into the library of the  _Cluedo_  board game. He looked at his cards with a scowl then hummed. "Okay, Mustard, in the library with the noose." Howard showed Raj a card and he grumbled, slumping back against the couch. "But, seriously dude, this might be the silver lining for a Nobel! You've waited ten years for this, you shouldn't reject it."

Howard scribbled something down on his notepad then rolled the dice before moving his piece into the kitchen. "Peacock, in the kitchen with the gun." Leonard showed him a card, and the engineer sighed. "Raj is right, stage fright is such a sissy award to not accept it. This time, I actually care about your piddly ass little problem and I highly suggest that you accept the award." He crossed something off on his notepad and grinned at Sheldon. "Besides, if you screw it up again, the twins might get siblings!"

Sheldon threw him a dirty look as he stared down his cards, "please, as if that—"

"We gonna get a bwo-dah?" Andy exclaimed as he tore hid attention away from  _Yo Gabba Gabba_. "No sistah, pwease! No want 'nadah Maddie!"

Maddie huffed from her couch, turning her head to look at their father. "No want a bwo-dah wike Andy, too! He no good. Maddie want bettah one."

"Wat? Andy good, Maddie da one not good!" Andy said while pointing to himself then to his twin. "Dat why Andy no want a sistah."

"No," Maddie dragged out, glaring at her brother, "Andy no good. Maddie da bestest, you no good."

"Okay, okay, calm down," Raj softly ordered, turning away from the board game and leaning down towards the bickering siblings. It wasn't a normal day unless the twins didn't argue over something. "You're not going to get siblings, okay?" The two toddlers both grumbled, and Raj wondered if it was because they were disappointed that they weren't going to get another brother or sister, or because no one won in their argument. "Your Uncle Howard was just joking about that."

Howard tittered, "but, if you want one, just give your parents some alcohol then—ow! Raj, I was kidding!"

Maddie huffed, turning back to the tv. "No want a bwo-dah and sistah, anyway."

"It good dat we not get 'nadah Maddie. One is good." Andy sighed in relief before turning back to his show and concentrating on it, again.

Sheldon—who chose to not pay attention to the whole 'getting another sibling' discussion—landed on a ten and moved his piece into the living room. "Plum, in the living room, with the trophy." Raj showed him the card for the trophy and he hissed, crossing off trophy on his list of clues. "This game is more intense than I originally thought. Leonard your turn."

Leonard grabbed the dice, shaking inside his hands then dropped them on the board. He always had an odd way of rolling the dice. "Hey, Sheldon, I was wondering… would it be alright if Penny and the twins could go with us? The twins would love to see you getting the award." He moved his piece to the living room and checked his list. "Scarlet, in the living room with the trophy." Raj showed him the card for Scarlet and he hissed. "I thought I finally got it. Drat."

"Hmm… my mother informed me earlier that they wouldn't be able to go, again. I heard the sound of something crashing down on the floor, breaking into at least a hundred pieces and decided not to press on further." Sheldon informed as Raj started his turn. When he called his mother to tell her that he was going to refuse the award again, she didn't tell him to listen to 'Jesus Take the Wheel' like she did last time and simply told him that she would just send another letter. Then, he asked why they wouldn't be able to go, and he heard something crashing in the background and Missy hissing a stream of expletives that he was uncomfortable of repeating. In fear of pressing on and feeling his twin sister's wrath, he politely ended the call. Looking back at it now, the sound he heard was like Legos crashing on the floor. "I guess it would be alright for the twins to be of attendance as a support group of some sort. Are children allowed?"

Raj nodded after he (again) declared that it was Mustard, in the library with the noose and was disproved by Howard, again. "Yeah, I don't think there's anything saying that kids can't attend. Besides, they're your children—though, they don't know that—and are official members of your C-Men!" Both Leonard and Howard groaned while Sheldon happily grinned at the thought that he had his own X-Men. "We won't let thirty-six adults or seventy children trample you! Unless, of course, you make a fool out of yourself in front of the committee, again, then that's where we draw the line."

They all looked up when the front door opened and Penny entered with a wide grin on her face and a hand hiding something behind her back. "Hi guys! Whatcha doing?" She happily asked as she closed the door and stood in front of it to hide whatever was behind her.

"We're playing Cluedo," Leonard informed her as Howard contemplated on where to move his piece. "And don't you have to go to the Hindsight taping on weekends?"

Penny nodded, glancing over to the twins who had their full attention on the dancing… things on the screen. "Uh, I do, but I finished all of my scenes early and got to go home early. So, I decided to hang out with you guys. Anyway! I stopped by here cause I have something for Sheldon."

"Is it another kid?" Howard joked as he moved his piece into the living room. "I'd be getting a lot of money from these two losers if it was."

"I'm going to ignore that," the blonde cringed and moved closer to the coffee table. "Sheldon, I got you this!" She pulled her hand out from behind and held a plastic covered suit. "Pretty nice, huh? And it isn't just one color, like how you like it!"

Sheldon stared at the tan suit jacket, black shirt inside and the dark slacks; what was with Penny and buying him formal wear? He was perfectly fine with the ones he had—his checkered suit—and could not understand why Penny always felt the need to get him a new one. He still had the black one he wore before (though, the pants were gone) and the one she ordered Raj to make him wear for that party for her. He'd never understand Penny and the need to keep buying unnecessary clothes. He was supposed to reject the suit that (knowing Penny) was a total waste of money, but the way she was beaming at him made him backpedal his decision. He was too troubled to care. "I—I appreciate the thought, Penny, but the suit you made me buy did not work the first time. What makes you think that it would work, now?"

The blonde's smile was unfaltering and he knew that there was no way that he could avoid this. "You just have to trust me on this, Sheldon. I have a feeling that that suit will definitely give your confidence a boost." She shook the plastic covered suit with glee before draping it over his desk chair. "Not only are you gonna rock that stage with your awesome speech, but you're gonna look great as well!" She spun the chair around before taking a seat on it.

Leonard showed Howard a card then turned to Penny, "by the way, do you want to go with us to the awarding ceremony? Sheldon would love to have you and the twins there."

Penny blinked before turning to Sheldon with wide green eyes, "really? I get to go, too?"

"I see no need why you shouldn't," Sheldon nonchalantly stated, checking his cards one last time before grabbing the envelope filled with answers. "It was Plum, in the living room, using the dumbbell." He opened the envelope to see what was inside and pulled the three cards out, "I win." He placed the cards on the table as the three men all grumbled on how he beat them to it, and glanced at Penny. "As I was saying; I see no reason why you can't be invited—unless you have prior engagements, of course—I would like the twins to be present and it would be wrong not to invite you, too."

Howard fixed the board for a second round, "what Sheldon here is saying is that he'd like you to go. Are you gonna go?"

Penny nodded eagerly, smiling at each of them. "Of course! I'm still part of the C-Men, so, I'm definitely gonna go, too!"

The three men all cheered while Sheldon simply rolled his eyes. It's not like her presence would be of any help with his stage fright, and he had a feeling that her being there might even make it worse. Nevertheless, he had already said that she could go, and there was no going back on it.

* * *

"So, I was wondering…" all three of the men at the table groaned as Raj started another one of his odd discussions, "why was the Chancellor's Awards moved to October when it's normally held in end March or at the start of April? I don't see any other awarding ceremonies jumping dates whenever they want. They're always held on the same month that they're always held. Isn't it a bit fishy?"

Howard scoffed, "I don't know, someone must have moved it to make it fit into their schedule or something. Are you really supposed to think about those kinds of things, right now?"

"Hey, it's something to think about!" Raj defended, taking another sip of alcohol. "You should be aware of everything that's happening around you, and this is one of those. Still, aren't you curious on why they moved it? Someone must have wanted to unrealistically change the date just so that it would work. How selfish."

The engineer shook his head while Sheldon sighed for the fifteenth time since they arrived at the venue. "What if I get frozen on stage and faint? I'll become an even bigger fool than I was the first time! Is it truly too late to go home and just play Wii Resort? That is more relaxing than this nerve wracking event we are currently at." He paused and blanched, his gaze turning to the bottle of alcohol sitting in front of Raj. "I think I'm going to be sick."

"Remember, you're banned from drinking anything with alcohol," Leonard warned, slowly moving the bottle away from Sheldon's vision. "Alcohol didn't help you the first time, and I strongly doubt that it would, this time. Just drink your Mountain Dew."

Sheldon frowned at his roommate, clucking his tongue in annoyance. "I am not planning on drinking, Leonard. I am merely expressing my woes, and am expecting that my C-Men will do something to help me."

"I thought that we were going to think of a new name for that?" Raj asked, cringing at the sound of their 'team' name.

"Weww, weww, weww," a familiar voice started, causing all of them to turn around to see Kripke smugly smirking at them. "If it isn't the wosah bwigade."

"Kripke," Sheldon snarled as the aforementioned man stalked closer to their table. "Funny to see you here, since you're never even considered to win."

"Hiwawious, Coopah, you don't heaw it, but I'm waughing." Kripke sneered, grabbing the bowl of nuts on their table. "Awthough, thewe's something even funniew than me not getting considewed fow the Chancewwow's Awawd." He pulled his phone out from his pocket and played a video, "and it's you embawassing youwsewf two yeaws ago!"

_"Alright people, let's get down to the math; it is only three dimensional thinking that limits our imagination. Can I take my pants off over my head? Of course not, my body's in the way. But, if we had access to higher dimensions; we can move our pants, around our bodies through the fourth dimension and our days of dropping trousers would be over! Now, for the astronomers in the audience, get ready to see the dark side of the moon—here's Uranus!"_

Kripke started laughing wildly while the others tried to suppress their laughter. "Wook at you making a foow of youwsewf, Coopah! I have this saved in my phone, and I gotta say, everwytime I'm upset, I just watch this and I wemembah how much of a wosah you awe! Now, I am so weady fow you to make a foow of youwsewf, again!"

Raj stood and glared at the physicist, "Sheldon's not allowed to drink alcohol—he's not going to be an embarrassment! So, why don't you record someone else, cause Sheldon's not going to make a fool of himself like we all think he will!"

Howard grabbed Raj's sleeve and pulled him down, "Raj, you're really not helping!"

"What? I'm just defending our leader's honor! We gotta stand up for him; he's our Professor X, remember?"

"I know that, but you don't have to make a fool of yourself in the process!"

"Okay, both of you, cut it out," Sheldon hissed, standing from his seat and making his way to where Raj and Kripke were standing. "Save your ridicule for when your experiments fail, Kripke, because the only one who will be embarrassed is you; not me." Kripke opened his mouth to say another smug laced comment but he was cut off by a commotion at the entrance.

_"Isn't that Penny from Halfway There?"_

_"It is! What's she doing here?"_

_"I can't believe that she's actually here; her upcoming movie The Truth About Life was said to be scientifically accurate, and all of the critics are saying that it's going to be one of the best movies of the year!"_

_"I have to ask her to take a picture with me, but I'm too shy to ask her!"_

_"Oh, and her kids are here, too! Is she related to one of the awardees?"_

_"Those kids are cuter in person than on tv! I love her show!"_

Sheldon frowned as people crowded around the entrance and glared at Leonard. "I told you that there was a huge possibility of this happening. Now, everyone will be too awe stricken by her to listen to me getting awarded."

"You didn't even want to accept the award in the first place," Leonard pointed out as Penny tried to breakaway from the crowd and started making her way to their table. "Wouldn't everyone being too distracted to listen to you actually help your stage fright problem?"

"That is true, but still," Sheldon hissed, his frown deepening as the people fawned over Penny. "This is supposedly a night to honor everyone who won—not just me—and I feel for those students who will be overshadowed by her."

Howard glanced over his shoulder and grinned, "although, they might get overshadowed by the fact that the four of you are wearing matching outfits."

Sheldon narrowed his eyes as he saw Andy's outfit which composed of a tan suit, a black dress shirt and crystal blue tie that was the exact same ones (only toddler sized) that he was wearing. Then, he glanced at Penny and Maddie who were wearing matching black dressed that had white and—he tried not to roll his eyes at this—the same crystal blue stripes across the fabric. This was an  _awarding ceremony_  not a fashion show—what was even with Penny and clothes?! Maybe, it really was her superpower; telling people what to wear. Yes… it  _was_  her superpower. While the world crumbled around her, she would be busy thinking of what each panicking citizen should wear when they die a horrible death because she didn't do anything to help them but fix their outfit.

"Aha! I told you you'd look great in that!" Penny commented as she stooped in front of them, Maddie on her hip and Andy grinning up at him. "You look better than you did the last time!"

Maddie reached her arms out to him and he instinctively took her from her mother's arms. "Fashanabah!" She chirped in agreement as she tapped his tie, and grinned up at him.

Penny lifted Andy up to her hip, and beamed at Sheldon. "Look at you and Maddie—you two look so cute! I want to take a picture but I didn't bring my phone. Ah! I just wanna frame you up!"

Sheldon scowled at Penny's giddiness. There was nothing 'cute' about this, and he would ignore her had he not been carrying Maddie, and if everyone wasn't staring at them like they were the a pot of gold. "Penny, was matching outfits really necessary? More people are crowding us than the amount needed to trample me. The attention is unnerving, and the idea of the four of us wearing similar clothes is bothering me to a great extent."

"Aww, you're such a party pooper! You look fine, and the people won't trample you, okay? Besides, if only me and Maddie matched, Andy would feel left out. So, I got the two of you to match!" He would never really understand Penny and her need to be fashionable. "Is that why you got me this suit? So that Andy and I could match?"

The blonde nodded and he resisted the urge to sigh. "Yup! I was out shopping with Gregg and I saw yours and Andy's outfit in one of those suit stores and I just had to buy it. I know, you take Andy—I'll take Maddie—and let's take a picture!" She turned to Raj who quickly pulled his phone out and stood. She handed Andy to Raj, then took Maddie from Sheldon who took Andy then sidled up next to Sheldon. "Raj, make sure that we look great!"

"Do we really need to take a picture?" Sheldon whined, glancing down at Penny who was standing a bit too close to him. The only people he allowed in his personal space was his mother, his Meemaw, (not that he could do anything about it) Missy and the twins. Penny was still not allowed anywhere near his person, even though he would allow her in his tree fort if he ever had one. He also decided to that she would let her inside his bomb shelter-slash-anti zombie underground hideout as he knew that the twins wouldn't be happy if she would not survive the invasion. But, that didn't mean that she could just lean next to him as if he was a wall! He had no problems with taking a picture, but that did not mean that he was okay with feeling her breathing next to him! "And must you really stand so close to me?"

Penny nudged his side with her elbow and laughed as he hissed at her. "Of course! The four of us look great, so we have to take a picture!" She glanced up at him and matched his scowl with a bright smile, "you really gotta lighten up, sweetie! You're gonna do great tonight—now, smile for the camera or else I'm going to poke you until you do."

Sheldon sighed in defeat; there was no use of going against the blonde as he knew that she wasn't going to stop annoying him until he agreed. When he was done getting nervous about his speech, he was definitely going to give Penny a strike or two for making him go along with this. He was taken out of his thoughts when he felt two tiny fingers pushing the corners of his mouth upwards and found Andy grinning up at him with his index fingers next to his mouth. "What are you doing?"

"Make daddy say cheese!" He happily said, retracting his hands from his face. "Say cheese and take picha!"

"Dude, hurry up and smile!" Raj called, lowering his phone slightly, "my arms are getting tired from waiting for you to get in the picture!"

"Fine, but this will be the last time I'm ever doing this." He muttered as he felt Penny's elbow poking his side, again. The longer he stalled the longer he'd have to suffer.

"One, two, three—cheese!" Raj tapped a button as the four grinned—a small smile for Sheldon—and took another one right after that. "You guys looked great! Look!"

Leonard felt his smile faltering when he felt someone tapping on his shoulder, "what is it, Kripke?"

Kripke blinked, glancing at the four then back at the experimental physicist. "I didn't want to ask this, but does Coopah and Woxanne have some sowt of wewationship going ow something? They wook wike a fweaking famiwy!"

Howard chuckled from his seat and poured more wine in his glass. "You know, Kripke, none of us really know."

* * *

The general rule of thumb stated that either thirty-six adults or seventy children would be enough to trample him. Glancing around, he wondered if eighty-three adults—minus his friends and Penny—would be enough to kill him.

It was safe to say that this was the most nerve racking experience he had ever had to go through. The incident from two years ago was just humiliating, and he thanked his mother's god that he barely remembered what happened that night. The anxiety he was feeling was  _nothing_  compared to how he felt when he had to make his valedictory speech. That was child's play—this was just one big nightmare that he couldn't wake up from. Back then, he was just a plain threat to them with him being fourteen and them being in their twenties. Most of them were not happy that a child was better than them, but he knew that they respected him in their own way. Even though he didn't have a lot of acquaintances at the university—much less friends—a lot of the students in his classes congratulated him when he became summa cum laude.

This time was so different; instead of thinly veiled contempt, the people currently surrounding him barely tried to hide it. He could hear them whispering at how embarrassing he was the last time and that he should have been banned from ever getting an award. He also heard some of them asking why he was being honored  _again_  when most thought that he was crazy. He wasn't new to the skepticism regarding his intelligence—he got that all the time when he was in university. His peers often refused to believe that he was smarter than them with him being only eleven. However, that was a different story, and it bothered him how they still refused to see his contributions to the world of science. Some of the dignitaries were (loudly) whispering on how he didn't even deserve the award and it made his confidence wither with each insult.

"I have a bad feeling about this," he muttered, sighing softly as his friends turned to face him. "It is something akin to foreboding—is it too late to leave?"

Raj raised his eyebrows and wiped the alcohol from his mouth. "What? You can't just leave. You're going to go up on that stage, make the best speech ever and you're going to be great!"

Howard nodded, scrutinizing a thin piece of bread. "Yeah… and we promise to clap for you."

"You shouldn't get nervous, buddy. You're close to solving one of the biggest mysteries in the world, this is going to be a piece of cake." Leonard added, reassuringly from across him. "Think about it; Nobel laureate Dr. Sheldon Cooper has stage fright is a horrible headline. It should be; Dr. Sheldon Cooper—future Nobel laureate—accepts first of many awards he's going to get for his great contributions to science."

Andy looked up from his plate of mashed potatoes, "Maddie, wat a wow-iyat?"

Maddie turned to their father and tugged on his sleeve. "Daddy, wat a wow-iyat?"

"It's  _laureate_ ," he corrected, turning his attention to the two toddlers sitting on booster seats beside him. "It is a person who is honored with an award for outstanding creative or—in my case—intellectual achievement. If my research produces the result I think it will produce, I will be recognized and will be awarded the Nobel Prize for physics. Thus making me a Nobel laureate."

"Oh," she chirped, "daddy win, yet?"

He shook his head and patted her head when she frowned. "Not yet, but I will soon. I'm about to publish my paper, only after that can we know if I will win. I'd be very happy if I did, though."

Andy hummed from beside Maddie and grinned up at him. "Andy know dat you gonna win, daddy. Mommy say dat you da smahtest man in the uni-vas!"

"Andy wight, daddy," Maddie nodded, giving him a thumbs up that he was sure was from Raj. "You gonna win and get da low-iyat! Maddie knows so."

Sheldon softly smiled at the two toddlers' words and felt guilty at the same time. The twins had now become his favorite people in the world—tied with his Meemaw—and it made him feel bad for not telling anyone about them, yet. The only people who knew about them were the guys and Amy, and no one else. He didn't even have the courage to tell his family in fear of getting a bible smacking from his mother. He had been wanting to tell them since the day that he found out, but he was always unable to do so once he heard his mother's voice on the phone. He was a coward for it, and he knew that he had to tell them soon. He didn't want to be like Penny with the not telling anyone bit. The more he hesitated, the more his mother would get angry at him for not telling her. He also had a feeling that even his Meemaw would be disappointed in him.

Leonard often told him that he would only make it worse by stalling, but Penny simply told him to tell his family when he was ready. She said that this was something big, and that he couldn't tell them in the same way that he would if he bought a new shirt. Surprisingly, he found sense in what Penny said and it only got him even more bothered. How was he even supposed to tell his mother that he had children and that he didn't know of their existence until recently? She would his him with a sizzling frying pan if he wouldn't be able to answer her properly, and he really did not want that to happen. He still had to win the Nobel before he would allow anything bad to happen to him—i.e. his mother drowning him in holy water or dropping a ton of bibles on his head, enough to kill him. It wasn't unlikely with the way their mother overreacted.

But, he'd deal with that later as he had other things to stress about.

"Sorry I disappeared," Penny said as she appeared from somewhere he didn't see. He didn't even noticed that she was gone. "There were a couple of paparazzi outside who were tipped off by someone here trying to pry information on why I was here. I had to do damage control and told them that I'm here to support my friend, like what I really am doing." She returned to her seat beside Andy and raised an eyebrow. "Is everything alright? You look paler than usual."

"I do believe that it's impossible for him to become paler, but yes, he is a bit pale."

Sheldon blinked at the familiar voice and turned around to find Amy standing behind his chair. "Amy, I thought that you would be unable to attend due to the symposium in Long Beach that you had to attend?"

The brunette nodded slightly, glancing around as she spoke in monotone. "I was supposed to attend, but there was a minor problem with the other speakers' schedule so, I—" she paused, her eyebrows furrowed as she turned to the blonde two chairs down from him. "I—is that… Penny?" She quickly rounded the table and took a seat on the empty chair beside Penny, "oh my—you're here! In the flesh! In front of me! With your golden hair, green eyes and sun kissed skin—pinch me, am I dreaming?!"

Penny's eyes widened as Amy extended an arm towards her and started pinching to see if she was asleep. "No, you're not dreaming and it's nice to finally meet you, A—"

Amy leaned forward, pulling the blonde into a tight hug as she suppressed a high pitched squeal of joy. "My bestie! My bestie and I have finally met—this is a dream come true! Somebody take a picture of me and my bestie!" Her gaze landed on Raj who quickly pulled out his phone and took a picture. "Yes! I have a picture with my bestie—you better send me that. Wait, bestie, do you have a Facebook account?" Penny nodded. "Wonderful! I'll just add you and we can be besties on social networking sites!"

_"And now, to welcome our next awardee; Dr. Leonard Hofstadter!"_

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen, I'm Dr. Leonard Hofstadter and it is my great honor to introduce the winner of this year's Chancellor's Award for Science and my best friend; Dr. Sheldon Cooper." The people applauded and Sheldon felt himself sink more and more into his chair. "But before I do, I'd like to share with you a letter from Sheldon's grandmother who couldn't be here tonight. Dear Moonpie, words cannot describe how proud I am of you…"

"Oh sweet suffern' jesus," Sheldon hissed as Leonard read his Meemaw's letter. "I'm next—Raj, feel my hand, does it feel clammy? I think I'm going to faint, I can already feel the bile rising up in my throat. This is bad, really bad. Can't we just leave?"

Sheldon saw Penny opening her mouth to say something but was cut off by Amy talking. "Sheldon, I can tell by the rate of your fidgeting that you are—indeed—very nervous. I believe that you will do fine, and I suggest that you consider this as your first step in taking over the world. It always starts with a motivational speech." The brunette gave him a small grin, and he felt himself smiling, as well. Leave it to Amy to cheer him up; the neurobiologist always knew the right things to say—that was why he had originally planned on having benign intellectually superior overlord progeny with her. It was like talking to himself, except with longer hair. "Thank you, Amy, that was very helpful."

Amy curtly nodded, "of course, you are my friend, and I am here to support you." She turned to the blonde beside her who looked like she was deep in thought. "If you ever need my support, just ring me up and I'll be there in no time, bestie."

Penny blinked at her before chuckling in response. "Uh, yeah, sure."

"—love and support, congratulations, Meemaw." Leonard cleared his throat as he returned the letter back into the envelope. "Well, that was touching… I wish I could get a letter as sweet as that. But, I digress." He placed the envelope inside his coat and smiled, "and now, ladies and gentlemen, our guest of honor; Dr. Sheldon Cooper."

Sheldon swallowed the lump in his throat as he rose, the sound of his heart beating drowning out the applause. He slowly made his way up the stage—Leonard gently smacking his back as he passed him—and stared out into the crowd. They were all staring at him, and that was when he felt his entire body go numb.

* * *

"Oh my god, he froze," Leonard pointed out as he saw Sheldon open and close his mouth like how a fish would. "Should I go up there? He might faint!"

Raj frowned as he listened in to the audience's comments, "this is bad. Maybe, we should have given him at least one drink!"

"Are you crazy?" Howard retorted, glancing around to see what people's reactions were to the motionless physicist. "They checked his breath for any sign of alcohol at the door. That idea would have gotten him to forfeit the award. Besides, it's too late for that now."

Amy shook her head as she looked up at her friend, "shouldn't we do something about this? Knowing Sheldon, it won't take long until he faints, or makes a fool out of himself."

Penny sighed in regret at the sight of Sheldon looking like a deer caught in headlights; she shouldn't have forced him to accept the award when she knew that it was hard for him to fight the stage fright. She just wanted to help him out—she didn't expect him to get petrified when he seemed to be okay minutes ago. Which was a total lie, because she could see how nervous he was when he realized that he was about to go up on stage. She regretted not doing anything other than giving him poor advice and buying him clothes; they really weren't helping. This was all her fault, and she didn't know anything that could hel—

"Mommy," Maddie called, gently tapping her arm and tearing her out of her thoughts. "Yes, what is it, sweetie?"

The toddler tilted her head to the side in thought before pointing to the empty seat beside her. "Andy missing."

_THUMP!_

Penny immediately glanced up at the stage as Andy started crying due to him tripping on the last step of the stairs. She could hear the whispered conversations and the debates throughout the room as they all stopped to question who the kid was. Some were wondering why 'the super famous actress' son was on stage and what exactly Sheldon's relationship with the toddler was. She already had a feeling that however this scene would play out, she knew that Sheldon's privacy would be ruined forever. She could already imaging the paparazzi stalking the mysterious man who was the twins' father that she never spoke about. God, she hoped that none of the people here would spill about this.

She was about to rush to the stage when Sheldon did something unexpected; he seemed to have broken out of his trance before stepping away from the podium and walking over to where Andy was sitting. He didn't even noticed that the microphone was still in his hand as he crouched down and spoke to him. "Are you hurt?"

Andy sniffed, pointing to his knee. "Andy fall down—it ouchie!"

Sheldon reached his hand out to pat his son's head before lifting him up as an attempt to calm him down. Andy wiped his tears on Sheldon's jacket—which cause several people who knew Sheldon to gasp—and looked around the room with wide eyes. "What we doing?"

"I am currently about to give an acceptance speech for winning this year's Chancellor's Award for science." He calmly told him, looking as if he hadn't just frozen in front of all of them due to stage fright. He looked confident and Penny wondered what exactly got rid of this problem. It was like he wasn't even nervous mere seconds, ago.

"Daddy win?" Andy asked with interest, which caused the whole room to—dramatically gasp—at what the toddler revealed. Penny even heard a few murmurs on how they were sure that Sheldon was either gay or crazy, and she felt proud that they were wrong about Sheldon. They all looked absolutely perplexed to know that Sheldon had a son that she was resisted the urge to laugh at their face. She was so proud that she didn't even notice that people were whispering on how Sheldon was 'dating' a famous celebrity; aka, her. "Andy happy dat daddy win!" Andy turned to look at the audience, searching until he found his twin waving at him. "Maddie, daddy win da awahd!"

"Howy fwakk!" She heard Kripke—who moved from the other table to theirs—exclaim to Leonard who was grinning proudly at his best friend. "Coopah is the spwouts' fathew? How did that happen?"

"Easy," Howard started, "coitus." Raj, Leonard and Howard all laughed at Kripke's dumbfounded expression while Amy simply chuckled.

Penny saw Sheldon smirk—probably finally noticing how everyone's jaws literally dropped to the floor—as he walked back to the podium, still carrying Andy with one arm and she felt an odd sense of happiness at the sight of them. She knew that Sheldon was still afraid to inform his family that he had kids, and what she had just witnessed told her that he no longer had that problem. Plus, he looked like he had gotten rid of his stage fright. It was hitting two birds with one stone, and she couldn't help but smile at the fact that she (kinda) actually helped him out for once.

"Yes, like what my son said," Sheldon started, confidence dripping off from his tone and how he stood, "I am this year's recipient of the Chancellor's award and unlike before; I'd like to thank my friends, Penny, my children Andy and Maddie, as well as the committee for choosing me—again—and for recognizing my contributions in the field of science. Science is moving forward; faster than the speed of light and more so than ever. Thank you." He gave them a small smile as the people applauded and he carried Andy back to their table; the toddler still babbling on how happy he was that his daddy won.

Penny met him in front of the table with wide, amazed green eyes as she comprehended what Sheldon had said in front of everyone. He actually thanked her and the twins in his speech—because how could not be shocking and touching at the same time?! And not only did he lose his stage fright, but he also lost his uncertainty on claiming that the twins were his. She just couldn't help herself from grinning at him as he and Andy reached their table.

"You did amazing! We're all so proud of you, sweetie, and thank you for including me in your speech." She pulled him in for a hug and winked at him once she stepped back to take Andy from his hold. "You were great up there, you know."

Sheldon gave her a tight smile as she placed Andy back on his chair, Maddie lightly scolding him for not telling her what he was going to do. "Thank you; it was only right to mention you as well, had Andy not been there, I might have been stuck up there. I believe that credit should be given where credit is due, and you deserve it." There was a moment of silence between them as the show continued on, then she noticed that he suddenly had a serious expression on his face.

"Hey, are you okay?" she asked before he said something that she didn't expect to hear anytime soon.

"Penny, I believe it is time that I tell my family about the twins."


	15. Cooper Territory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sheldon, Penny and the twins take a trip down to Texas.

Leonard was playing an intense game of four-on-four online Grand Theft Auto 4 against three other people he never met before when the front door suddenly flew open, followed by Penny entering the apartment while talking to someone on her phone.

"Can't you do something to stop it? I'm sure that you can make something happen to stall it…" she said as she bent down to kiss the both of the twins—whom he had forgotten were in the room as he concentrated on playing an inexplicably violent video game that they were attentively watching—on their foreheads. "Yes, out loud. I don't know—eighty? Eighty-seven? Do you honestly think that I'd even care to count all— fine. No, I'm just worried about how they'll react to it."

Penny turned to face the door, a hand on her hip, and Leonard took this as an opportunity to forfeit the game, turn of the PS3 and change the channel to something a bit more kid friendly before the blonde realized that the twins were watching him mercilessly shoot one of his opponents with a machine gun. "Of course! You know them, they'll take whatever they can get, then they'll twist it and make into a good buck or two. Or forty thousand—I don't know how much they make for this. Right. I understand. Make sure that there won't be anything more to it until I say so. Okay. Thanks, I'll talk to you later. Bye." She huffed before stuffing her phone into her pocket, ending the fall and turning to face him. "Didn't I tell you  _not_  to play anything violent in front of the twins?"

He sent her a sheepish smile as she sat down on the armchair. "Sorry, they were taking a nap when I started playing and I hadn't noticed that they were in the room. It won't happen again," he placed the controller on the coffee table as Penny fumbled with something on her phone. "So… that phone call seemed a bit serious." The blonde turned towards him and he swallowed at her hostile glare. "Rough day at work?"

"Work was fine," Penny assured in a light tone before grumbling, "what's rough is how word got out about Sheldon's speech."

"Sheldon's speech?" Leonard echoed, changing the channel to Nickelodeon to distract the twins. Their hearing and comprehension skills were getting sharper with each day, and he didn't want them to hear something they weren't supposed to hear. "What about it?"

"Apparently, someone at the event told a few of the paparazzi that Sheldon is the mystery dad that I've never named," she explained with a small groan, causing Leonard to furrow his eyebrows in confusion. "Now, those same paparazzi have been trying to spread this tidbit of information like wildfire and I've been talking to my agent about it. So far, only a few of them have published the story about Sheldon on their blogs and most of them are just rookies. None of the credible paparazzi sites have picked up on it, yet, but that might be because they're all supposedly new. Thank god they weren't from TMZ or else we'd be in big trouble."

Leonard frowned slightly, "what's wrong with them finding out about Sheldon? I mean; he  _is_  the twins' dad, so I don't see anything wrong with it. Is this some kind of… celebrity status or reputation thing?"

Penny stared at him in disbelief before shaking her head. "God, you, too?" She muttered something inaudible before sighing. "Why do all of you think that I'm doing this because of my reputation? If I was, then I wouldn't have attended in the first place."

The experimental physicist winced at the annoyance mixed with disappointment in her voice and automatically wished that he just kept his mouth closed. It wasn't that he was thinking badly about Penny, he just didn't understand why she would want Sheldon's identity being kept secret when he really  _was_  the twins' father. As far as he knew, Penny wasn't dating anyone and Sheldon's true identity being revealed didn't mean that he was dating her, either. It just meant that Penny didn't get knocked up by someone she didn't know—like what some rumors said that really got on their nerves—and that she wasn't lying about her being friends with their father. Honestly, he didn't see anything wrong with any of it. "Uh, you kinda sounded like you did moments, ago—"

"Can't you imagine what will happen if word gets out about this?" Leonard cluelessly shook his head and Penny hissed. "If this spreads even more, you can just forget about Sheldon having any privacy. The paparazzi have been on my tail since my show premiered, trying to get so much as a hint on the twins' father's identity for the sole reason of bombarding him with questions about me and other things I can't even imagine. When news breaks out that the twins' father is actually some… super genius, the paparazzi won't stop in trying to get information from him—at all costs." Her words finally sunk in, and he paled at the thought of what would possibly happen. "They'll be digging up information about him; where he's from, what he's done, what he does, how we met, where he lives—and with Sheldon being the 'rockstar' of science, it's not unlikely for them to find out that he works at Caltech."

The actress paused, frowning as she thought of something before continuing. "As long as the paps have a name—along with a face to match it, they can pretty much find out anything they want to about Sheldon. And you know Sheldon; he doesn't like strangers being close to him… much less a handful of guys with cameras, prying on whether or not we're together and his opinion on the rumors about me." Her expression softened, and Leonard could see concern written all over her face. "I'm not sure if Sheldon will be able to handle that, and I don't want him to go through any of it. My agent has already gotten several phone calls this morning about the issue, asking if it's true. She told them that I wasn't going to comment on it for now—and because of that, I am a hundred percent sure that this is going to garner a lot of unnecessary attention."

She was right; based on what he saw on those rumors shows that often featured her, he knew that those paparazzi could dig up any information on anyone they wanted to. Famous or not. Just the other day when Raj was watching the 'TMZ' show; they were talking about some celebrity who had a new boyfriend who wasn't a celebrity. With just a name, one of the people there found out his job, where he lived, where he was from and even showed a picture from his Facebook account. He thought it was terrifying how they were such good stalkers, and just thinking about it happening to Sheldon made him feel horrified. His quirky roommate couldn't even handle having his haircut done by his usual barber's nephew, much less being swarmed by people he never knew.

"So, what's going to happen now? Are you going to deny it?"

She sent him a patronizing stare that she must have picked up from the man they were talking about. "Of course not! He's the twins' father and even if I don't want to drag him into the dark side of my fame, I'm not going to lie. I've decided that I'm going to confirm it as simply—and with as few explanations as possible—when a paparazzo brings it up; which, they will. I'm going to say; yes, he's their father and I hope that you guys respect his privacy. Then, I'll flash them a smile and go on my merry way. They'll press more into it, I'm sure, but as long as I beat them to it, the Sheldon-badgering will lessen. Think it'll work?"

Leonard gave him an unsure smile, "I'm not sure. Raj is the expert in all things gossip—after you, of course. I might be able to answer you if you ask about physics, though." They both shared a laugh before the door unlocked and Sheldon appeared.

"Penny, you're here—perfect," Sheldon started jovially as he dropped his keys into the bowl then gave each of the tv focused twins a pat on their heads—which, Leonard noticed, was his roommate's way of greeting them. "I've been meaning to talk to you."

The blonde in question grinned up at him, as if there wasn't a big problem that she had just been worrying about moments, ago. "Heeey, Sheldon, you seem happy to see me. Is it because you finally realized that me dressing you up is a good luck charm or something like that?"

Sheldon stared down at her and raised an eyebrow, "don't be silly, Penny, I don't believe in luck." Penny chuckled as he removed his messenger bag then his windbreaker and took a seat on his desk chair, turning it to face them. "What I was going to tell you was that I am going to visit my family."

"That sounds like a great idea," Leonard remarked, nodding in agreement while the blonde blinked. "And you should take the twins with you if you don't want your mother to kill you."

"Yes, I've thought about that and realized that it would benefit my life more if I were to formally introduce the twins to my mother instead of just telling her about them over the phone." He swiveled his chair towards Penny who was still silent. "Which brings me back to what I was supposed to tell you. Though, I absolutely do not feel—nor see—the need to do this, I shall as Raj told me that this was the correct protocol in doing so. Penny, will it be alright for me to take the twins along to Texas tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow?" Penny repeated, looking like she was considering something.

The theoretical physicist nodded, "tomorrow. I have already asked for vacation time earlier—which is primarily the reason why I arrived late and why I asked Raj to drive me back—and Dr. Gablehauser already approved my request to have the rest of the week off." Sheldon hummed, his eyebrows knitting as he did so, "and for some odd reason, it barely took him a second to approve it. He must have understood my need for personal time off to settle some unfinished business—and now, I'm officially on paid leave. If you agree, we'll leave tomorrow and return on Friday evening at the least."

"Yeah, okay," she answered, causing Sheldon to grin and she raised a hand, "on one condition."

"What?" Sheldon asked, narrowing his eyes. "What condition?"

"That I come along," Penny firmly answered, standing up and walking over to the fridge to get a bottle of water. "And before any of you ask, I'm going cause your mother won't be too happy if I'm not going to be there. I already tarnished her son, had kids out of wedlock and it would be a bit disrespectful if I didn't appear as well. So… count me in."

Leonard quietly watched as Penny returned to the armchair to see Sheldon deeply scowling; obviously unhappy at the turn of events. He must have not expected her to tag along. "Fine, but if you're going along, I will not be held responsible for any more delays on shooting your show or for my mother forcing you to pray and ask for forgiveness. I cannot promise any warm welcomes once I drop the proverbial bomb on them. And we're going to take the train."

"Mr. Fleming will understand why I'll be gone, and I don't think it would be fair if you're the only one who experiences your mother's wrath." She stated with a small shrug, "like I said, it'd be wrong for me not to go—the twins are mine just as much as they are yours. And, too bad for you, we're going to travel by plane cause it's faster."

There was a mini glaring contest between the two of them to decide on whether they'll take the train or the plane, and after five minutes, Sheldon sighed in defeat. "Alright, but the airline company must be of my approval or else we're all taking the train." He turned back to his desk and booted up his laptop. "And due to Raj informing me of the commotion I caused by announcing that I am Andy's father; I have decided that I shall fly out first so that the paparazzi won't see me with you."

Penny and Leonard shared a look, and they both wondered if Raj—they were both going to have to talk to him on shutting his mouth—really told Sheldon about the 'issue' about him or if he overheard their conversation before they arrived. Sheldon didn't sound like he was lying, but it wasn't impossible that he heard them. It was Penny who broke the wordless conversation between them and stood, walking over to Sheldon to see that he was already booking a flight. "I'll leave in the morning, then you and the twins can leave after that. That way, none of us will be seen together."

"Don't be silly, Sheldon," Penny said, lightly bumping his arm to make him move so that she could use the laptop. "We're going to fly out together, and there's nothing you can do about it." She glanced down to see him frowning up at her, and Leonard simply chuckled.

Things didn't look as bad as he thought it would be.

* * *

"Daddy, wook! Dat a cwoud! Wook, wook! It big!"

Sheldon resisted the urge to groan as Andy repeatedly tapped his arm. His son was a bit too energetic for his tastes, but he guessed that he got it from his mother. "Yes, I can see the cloud. It's very nice," he gave Andy a smile before tugging on the collar of his jacket in irritation.

"What's with that face, Sheldon?" Penny asked from the opposite aisle; Maddie still sound asleep on the seat beside her.

"I'm fine. I just don't understand why I must wear the attire you told me to wear," he grumbled, glancing down at the itchy jacket and pants that Penny forced him to wear. Before they left the apartment, Penny gave him—he rolled his eyes at this—a set of clothes to wear and simply told him to trust her when he complained. "Why must I wear sunglasses and this ridiculous outfit?"

The blonde raised an eyebrow at him, "it's cause I don't want you to get recognized."

"If you didn't want people to know about my connection to you, you should have just allowed me to fly by myself." He huffed; Raj had briefed him about the whole issue about him being the twins' father and how Penny was a famous celebrity and such. He didn't really care much about those things, and only wanted to visit his family with his children in peace. He did not expect her to tag along. "I would have been fine by myself."

Penny chuckled lightly, "you sound ridiculous, you know." He frowned at her—he was  _not_ ridiculous. "The only reason I'm making you do it is because I want to protect your privacy. If they see your face, the paparazzi are going to stalk you everywhere you go. I've been keeping your identity as a secret for your own protection—those guys will do anything to get a scoop on you. I don't want you to hate me for allowing five to ten strangers to follow you around while asking you questions about me that have nothing to do with you." She gave him a small smile that didn't annoy him as much as he wanted it to. "Not when we've become such good friends, again."

He clucked his tongue at her and she laughed in response. "If you're going to make me wear clothes that aren't to my liking, at least make sure that they are comfortable. This outfit is just too itchy."

"Hey! I specifically got that outfit cause I thought that you'd look good in it. I wouldn't get you something that wasn't good," she admitted, noticing that Maddie had woken up from her nap. "How was your nap, sweetie? It seemed to be a good one."

Maddie nodded sleepily; clutching her Winnie the Pooh doll to her chest as she rubbed her eyes. "It okay. We at tesas, yet?" She yawned before fully opening her bright blue eyes. "Maddie wanna meet Meema and Aunteh Missy and Gammy and Uncah Junyah aweady."

Andy—having picked up what his twin said—turned from the window and clambered over to his father's seat. "Andy wanna meet dem, too! Andy no go to tesas, yet."

"It's Texas, not tesas," Sheldon firmly corrected, stopping Andy from crossing over to his chair and running off. He shouldn't have removed the seatbelt right after they had become airborne—now, Andy wanted nothing but to run down the aisle and explore the rest of the aircraft. "And I am unsure if they'll be excited to meet either of you, given the fact that they will only be informed of your existence, now. But, I can assure you that they will be shocked."

Penny sent him a scathing look. "Do you really have to tell them that?"

"I am merely telling them of my opinion that may also be a fact." He nonchalantly shrugged, handing Andy his sippy cup, "I do not see why we must lie, Penny. Who knows? I might be wrong."

"Oh, you're  _so_  going to be wrong," she replied, her expression faltering back into a smile. "You were wrong with the whole flying thing; which means that you'll be totally wrong about their reactions."

Sheldon sighed before turning to her, "as much as it pains me to say it; you are right. I expected this whole experience to be terrible, yet I stand corrected. Though, it only goes for first class—I saw how cramped coach is. I am—in no way—letting a complete stranger sit  _that_  close to me without going through proper precautions."

Penny grinned proudly up at him, "I'm glad that you liked it. Consider this is as a thank you for all of the times I've mooched off of you in the past and for the possible trouble we'll get into when we land. I've got a strong feeling that your mom might poison me for what I've put you through. And for not telling them soon enough." She paused, her eyebrows shooting up as she realized something. "Crap, your mother is  _so_  going to kill me."

"I strongly doubt that my mother will do anything to hurt you physically," he told her, assuringly, "she has been coaxing me to give her grandchildren for years, now. There is a possibility that her joy of having grandchildren will overshadow the many frustrations she will have with our situation. Don't be too complacent, however, we will never know how she will actually react." He sent her a small smile that she returned by widening her grin. He didn't understand why Penny was happy practically most of the time and wondered how she could keep it up with the possible violent reactions that they might receive. Only she could be giddy during a serious situation. "Nevertheless, I am sure that we will return to California in one piece. Or so, I hope."

"Daddy, Mommy," Maddie called, getting the two adults' attention, "what a cwap?"

* * *

Sheldon grumbled to himself as the light turned green; it was utterly frustrating how  _so many_  people swarmed them (Penny) once they got out of the airplane.

Everywhere they went at the airport, people crowded to try to get a picture with her. There was so many people at the baggage claim that she even got separated from them—disappearing into the crowd as she yelled at him to go on—leaving him to guard the twins from any unnecessary attention while waiting for the twins' stroller and their luggage to appear on the conveyor belt. What pissed him off was the people (loudly) whispering around him, asking each other if he really was the twins' father. That, and the people badgering Penny about him. Then, once he managed to put them all on the cart and get to the car rentals, they had to wait another ten minutes before Penny finally appeared; looking apologetic for ruining his perfectly made itinerary.

Leonard warned him that this would happen, and he hated that he was right—and that he didn't listen. The whole scenario was just exhausting, and he was glad that they were finally away from all of it. The bad thing was that they had to go through it all over again when they went back home, unless he'd be able to convince Penny to allow him to fly alone. Which had a small possibility of happening.

"—and it had floor warmers, too. Why would I even want floor warmers, right? Well, it sounds pretty awesome, but not for the price they were asking for." Penny chattered in the driver seat, talking about something he absolutely  _did not_  care about. "It was a good thing that Gregg told me about Mr. Fleming selling his house, then I would've bought a house that was two million more expensive, yet uglier and older. Good decision, right?"

He stared at her for a moment before staring back at the road. "Why are you telling me this, again?"

Penny glanced at him and blinked innocently, "cause the twins are asleep and you're the only one I can talk to without sounding crazy. I've been driving for a while, now, and talking keeps me entertained."

"If we are to converse about trivial matters, I suggest that we discuss the various outcomes of what we're about to do, and how my family will react." The blonde shrugged, urging him to continue, "to use as a reference of some sort, how did your family react to you being pregnant?"

Another red light; there was one more before his house, and before he had to face his fears. "Hmm… to be honest, everyone got really emotional. My dad was furious, my mom and I were crying and my sister couldn't do anything to defend me. Looking back at it now, we would've looked like we were on a reality show or something."

"What was your father angry about?" He asked out of curiosity since Penny didn't fill him in about her family's reaction. All she told him was that they weren't too happy about her getting pregnant out of nowhere; nothing else. "And please refrain from glancing at me—I have no desire to die from a fiery vehicular accident anytime soon."

"Well…" she drawled, keeping her eyes on the road like he ordered her to. "My mom and my sister had the same reaction the entire time, it was my dad who changed his reaction like some sort of mood ring. He kept on asking about Leonard and when I told him that he wasn't the father, he got so mad that his voice could be heard all the way to the barn. It was kinda terrifying, but I managed." Sheldon's expression dropped as he turned to the blonde; he didn't expect Penny's father to have a non-physical violent reaction to her pregnancy. He thought that her entire family accepted it with open arms—he had been mistaken. How foolish. "Everything was tense at first, then it all died down. It really doesn't sound as bad as I'm letting it on to be."

There was a moment of silence—which was mainly because they both knew that she was lying about the intensity of her father's anger; but, he didn't press on. "I apologize for causing you to recall that unpleasant memory, I, however, assure you that my mother's voice isn't loud enough to reach any barns in the radius. She might be angry, but not as angry as I imagine that your father was." He told her as they reached another traffic light; the last one before the street to his house. "She might have some demands, though."

"Like?" Penny asked, drumming her fingers on the steering wheel as they waited for the light to turn green.

"She'll make me marry you."

There was another beat of uncomfortable silence that was quickly broken by the light turning green and Sheldon loudly clearing his throat. "But of course, that will not be happening as the 'you have to get married' protocol is only put into effect if the woman is pregnant; not when the children are about to turn two."

"How exactly do you know that you're only supposed to get married when the girl is pregnant?"

He looked out the window and recognized the house they passed; it was the house that Junior's girlfriend used to live in. "I know that because that's the reason why Junior got married to his wife." He was forced to fly back for the wedding when his mother informed him that Junior got his girlfriend—now wife—pregnant. They now lived at the front part of their lot, while their mother and Missy moved into the back part of their house which Junior turned into a separate, yet attached house. "My mother will try to do that what she did to Junior to us, but that will not happen. We are far too late to do so, and my mother cannot do anything about that. Me marrying you is now out of the question. The most she can do is give me a rather harsh bible smacking."

"Well, whatever happens, I promise to save you from any possibly bible smacking." She smiled as she parked the car in front of their house. "And we're here. I gotta admit; your house looks nice. Didn't you once say that your house was made of aluminum?"

Sheldon furrowed his eyebrows as he and Penny glanced at the blue colored, two story house. "It was a trailer home, and we had long moved out of it after tornado season. I haven't lived long here, as I moved to California after I had finished traveling around Europe as a visiting professor and am not knowledgable on the whole house—especially after they split the house into two when my father died." He unbuckled his seatbelt and opened his door. "They seem to have changed the paint, though. It used to be green last time I visited." He got out of the rental, staring at the house and bracing himself for what was to come.

"Why don't you go ahead?" He heard Penny say as she exited the car and made her way to the backseat to unbuckle the seat belts on the twins' carseats. "I still have to get the twins to wake up. I'll get the luggage for you."

"Fine, but done take long. I want to tell them as quickly as possible." She nodded in understanding and he turned around, making his way to the back where his mom lived. He could feel his palms getting sweaty from the uncertainty and he wished that what he was about to do wasn't as hard as it seemed. Once he reached the blue painted door, he took in a deep breath; this was it. He rapped his fist on the surface nine times and patiently waiter for someone to respond.

"Missy, someone's at the door! Get your butt out here and fix this while I get the door!"

There was a shuffling sound before the door opened, and he was face to face with his mother whose blue eyes could possibly not get any wider. "Shelly? What are ya doin' here—why didn't ya call to say that you were vistin' us?"

Sheldon blinked down at his mother who didn't look as happy to see him as he expected. "Hello to you, too, mother. I decided to have a surprise visit for once, and here I am." His mother continued to stare at him, and he fake coughed to clear the air of discomfort between him, the slightly opened door and his mother. "I came here with Penny—do you remember Penny?"

Mary nodded, still not fully opening the door. "Of course! That sweet blonde neighbor of yers that's really famous. Where is she?" His mother poked her head out of the gap and looked around for any sign of the blonde. "Is she invisible, now?"

A second later, they heard footsteps making their way to them and Sheldon stepped back as Penny appeared. "Hi, Mrs. Cooper. It's been quite a while, hasn't it?"

"Why yes! Yer even prettier than the last time I saw you!" The door opened slightly and Mary stepped out to hug the blonde. "What brings ya here, dearie? A show, perhaps?"

Penny smiled as she pulled away from Mary and looked at Sheldon for confirmation. "Actually, I'm here to see you."

Mary's smile dropped and she glared at her son, "what did my son do this time?"

Sheldon shook his head while Penny walked back towards the side of the house. "I—uh, let's wait for Penny to come back." He swallowed the lump that formed in his throat as his mother turned her gaze to the side; her mouth dropping in shock as Penny pushed the twins' stroller towards them. "Mom, I would like you to meet Andy and Maddie." Mary looked up at him with wide anticipating eyes, and he sighed. "They're your grandchildren."

"DID I JUST HEAR SHELLY SAY THAT YOU HAVE GRANDCHILDREN?" Missy yelled from inside the house, quickly appearing beside their mother before joining her in gaping at the two sleeping blonde toddlers in the stroller. "Well, I'll be damned. Shelly has children."

"Mom?" Sheldon muttered with concern at his mother's lack of reaction, and before they knew it; Mary Cooper fainted.

* * *

"—I moved back to Nebraska and had the twins there, then after a year, I got the role and moved back to California." Penny explained in front of the Cooper family which consisted of; the now conscious Mary, Missy, Junior, Meemaw—who wasn't really a Cooper, but she figured that she'd just consider her as one—and Sheldon who was silently staring off into space. "I didn't tell Sheldon until two months ago, so please don't get mad at him. It's really my fault why you haven't heard of the twins until, now, and I'm sorry for it."

Meemaw—Sheldon didn't correct her, so she guessed that she could call her that—smiled warmly at her, and she couldn't believe how kind and welcoming Sheldon's grandmother was. "My, haven't ya gone through a lot because of my Moonpie? But, I can't be mad at ya. Now, I have two more great-grandchildren and I can't be happier."

Missy hummed in thought as she tapped a finger against her chin. "I had'a feelin' that the news about the two of yas was true. I shoulda gone with my first hunch—who knew that I was correct?"

Junior—who was a burlier, tanner and manlier version of Sheldon—simply whistled; his dark blue eyes still wide with astonishment. "Wow, who'da thought that our Shelly would have kids, much less have them with a super famous actress like Penny. I shoulda bet more money on him during that bet, years ago."

Mary was still emotionlessly staring at her, mouth still slightly agape. She had been quiet the entire time, and hadn't spoken since she fainted from their news. They had no idea that she would react that way, and honestly; she was expecting the worse reaction from the Cooper matriarch. "Jesus… I don't know where to start," she mumbled, finally looking up from her trance and looked the blonde in the eyes. "How could the both of ya keep this as a secret? Do ya know that you have sinned? No grandchild of mine will be born out of wedlock!" She whirled around and lightly smacked her son on the arm. "How could you not have known that you got Penny pregnant?!" She hit him on the arm again, and Sheldon winced. "Now, ya can't marry her or else ya'll ruin her career!"

Penny avoided Sheldon's pleading gaze as Mary continued to smack him on the arm while releasing angry remarks towards him. That was better than bible smacking and Mary forcing them to get… married. It was a good thing that she wasn't mad at her, or else she'd be dead. "Dear Penny here said that she left my grandbabies with ya for two whole months," Mary hissed, Sheldon moving away from her in fear of another smacking, "how is it possible that ya didn't realize that they were yers?"

Sheldon furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, "I d—didn't think that—"

"Sheldon Lee Cooper," Mary sternly said, causing a terrified shiver to run down everyone except Meemaw's spine at the evident anger in her voice. Penny made a note to herself to never anger Momma Cooper. "I want you to take a long, hard look at those two adorable grandchildren of mine and tell me that there is not a single clue on their angelic faces that they are yours!"

The physicist timidly nodded and turned to gaze at the twins who were still sleeping in their strollers; tired from the long journey they went on. "I… uh, yes, mother, they do resemble me—"

"Resemble?" Mary's voice boomed, causing everyone to wonder how the twins still managed to stay asleep. "They look just like how you and Missy did when the two of yous were at that age." She grabbed a frame that sat on the side table beside the couch and handed it to her soon. "Look! They look just like you and Missy—except for the blonde hair. And some definin' features from Penny, but I do not see how you missed it."

Sheldon stared at the image of a young Junior, Missy and him then at the twins. How was he the only one who failed to see the resemblance between the three of them right after their first meeting? "I apologize; I had only noticed it recently, and that led to me discovering the truth." He placed the frame down on the coffee table before Penny took it. "That is why Penny and I went here, to formally inform you about them."

"They've been dying to meet all of you," Penny commented, earning a happy grin from each of the Coopers. "They're just a bit tired from the flight and the drive, but they'll be waking up soon." She quirked an eyebrow as—as if on cue—Andy stretched his arms before yawning and opening his eyes and blinked at all of the strangers in the room. His eyes widened as he stared at them and turned to his twin, shaking her arm to wake her up. "Maddie! Maddie we at tesas, now! Meema, Gammy, Aunteh Missy and Uncah Junyah hewe. Wake up!"

With a grumble, Maddie sat up, rubbing her eye before opening it to see everyone staring at the two of them. "Hi. I Maddie," she pointed a finger to her brother, "dat Andy. We mommy and daddy's kids."

A second later, both Mary and Missy were carrying a twin each, happily chatting with them as Sheldon noticed something… familiar on top of a circular table. "Is that my Lego Death Star?!" He shrieked as he bolted towards the now triangular object and glared at his brother who had an uninterested look on his face. "Dear god, it's been a month since I sent and it still hasn't been fixed! Junior! What did you do to my Lego Death Star?!"

"What?" Junior hissed, marching up to his younger brother. "I didn't do nothin' to it! Why do you always blame me, you little runt!"

Penny stared in awe as the four Coopers went their own ways, and she felt Meemaw chuckling softly beside her. "Aren't they entertainin' to watch? They're all different, yet all the same."

"Yeah, they are," she agreed, watching as Mary brought out a bunch of photo albums for the twins to look at, "Sheldon told me that they'd act differently than they did."

"That grandson of mine does have a knack of exaggerating things," Meemaw remarked. "You know, you're in Cooper territory, now." Penny turned to her with a confused look that she returned with a soft smile, "the two of us are the only ones who aren't Coopers, ya know. Kinda sad, isn't it?"

Mary Cooper; George Cooper Jr., Missy Cooper, Sheldon Cooper, Andy Cooper and Maddie Cooper. Meemaw was right, everyone inside the house—including Junior's family that she had yet to meet—was a Cooper except her and Meemaw. But, she knew that as Mary's mother, Meemaw was practically a Cooper herself. It was actually sadder than she originally thought with the twins being Coopers—it kind of made her feel left out. It sounded silly, but there really was nothing she could do about it. She suddenly felt Meemaw pull her in for a small hug, and looked up to see Sheldon's beloved grandmother smiling down at her.

"But don't be sad, dearie," she said as she softly patted her head, reminding her of her own grandmother, "you are the mother of my great grandchildren; that means that you're an honorary Cooper—like me! And you'll always be accepted here."

Penny broke out into a smile and pulled the old woman into a tight hug. "Thank you, Meemaw. Sheldon was so right about you being the best grandma in the world."

For a moment, she felt like she was home.

* * *

Mary Cooper prayed to Jesus for a lot of things; that Missy finally finds a nice man to settle with, that her mother lives longer, that Junior's children will grow up fine and for her Shelly to find someone who will love him and would give her grandchildren.

Without her knowing, her last prayer had already been answered, and what she got was even better than what she asked for—praise Jesus!

"Ya see those pretty faces of yers," she lightly tapped both of the twins on their noses, "Jesus was the one who made that possible."

"Mom, what are ya even talking about?" Missy asked, staring down at her mother who was sitting on the floor with the twins. "Shelly's gonna kill ya if yer tellin' them that science isn't real."

Mary sent her daughter a knowing look, "yer brother won't be able to kill me even if he tries. And my grandkids should know that there is a creator—cause if there wasn't, we'd never get the miracle of him actually havin' children."

Andy watched as Missy attached another Lego block to the Death Star that was finally looking… normal. "Daddy say dat da univahs stahted wid a big bang."

Maddie nodded in agreement, "a big, big bang, Gammy!"

Mary smiled warmly down at her grandchildren as she patted their heads in delight. They were just as smart as Shelly and that was another bonus that Jesus added in for her. "Yes, but that's cause God said so. There wouldn't be anythin' if it wasn't for him."

"Shelly's really gonna kill you," Missy muttered, glancing down at the manual that her brother gave him. "It's a good thing that he's out with Penny to get that thing he said he was goin' to buy."

"I like Penny," Meemaw commented from the couch, "she's very nice and pretty, and I can tell that she really cares for my Moon Pie."

Missy grabbed another Lego piece and scrutinized it, "I told ya' long ago that there was hope for Shelly in her. I'd die for her to be my new sister-in-law—her bein' a super famous celebrity is just a bonus."

"Of course, we want her to be a part of the family," Mary said with a shake of her head, "even I can see that she's the best thing that has ever happened to our Shelly!" She turned to her grandchildren who were watching them with curiosity. "Do you want yer mommy and daddy to be togetha?"

"Momma!" Missy hissed, stomping over to them, "ya don't just say that to two year olds! They might not understand what ya said and might get the wrong idea!"

Andy glanced at his sister, "mommy and daddy no togedah, yet?"

Maddie frowned in response, "mommy and daddy togedah! Daddy just no stay wid us, but mommy and daddy togedah!" Her frown softened and she looked up at their grandmother, "wight, gammy?"

"I told ya!" Missy chastised before sitting down in front of the twins, "don't listen to momma. Why don't we get some ice cream while we wait for yer parents to come back?"

"We shouldn't let this opportunity pass," Mary announced while Missy got the twins a bowl of ice cream. "Penny's the best daughter-in-law I can ever get for Shelly—she even flew down here with Shelly! That's a sign—can't you do anythin', mom?"

Meemaw softly chuckled, "I'm afraid not. This is somethin' that I'd like them to handle on their own. You can't force love, Mary."

"I think the love is there and it just needs a shove or two," Missy happily pointed out, handing a spoon to the twins, "it's not romantic love, but it's something and they just gotta see it. I got it! Why don't I talk to Penny about it? That'll definitely make her think about it."

Mary smiled at her daughter who wasn't as dumb as they all claimed, "yer right. That might be a good push for them, Missy. I can see it now—a nice, simple wedding and the three of us smiling proudly the whole time!"

"As much as I wanna say that yer wrong, I already love Penny," Meemaw admitted, causing her daughter and granddaughter to cheer. "But, ya better not use the twins as a reason, Sugar Cake, cause it's never good to use the children as excuse."

Missy smirked, she knew exactly what she would do, "of course not, Meemaw. I'll just make Penny open her eyes, then we'll be getting a new addition to the family in no time!"

The three women all grinned at the thought, causing the twins to simply shrug; they didn't understand a thing that the adults said.

* * *

The one thing Penny didn't like about the Cooper house was that there was only one bathroom, and that meant that she had to wait for Meemaw to finish before she could take a shower.

So, she decided to have some tea while she waited; thinking about the past two days they spent in the house. It wasn't as bad as she thought, and she loved the food Mary cooked, the stories Meemaw told, meeting Junior's family and seeing all of the embarrassing photos of Sheldon that Missy practically shoved towards her. She could also tell that the twins were enjoying themselves, as well. All three of them loved hearing about how Sheldon was when he was a kid, while the aforementioned man sulked as he rebuilt his Lego Death Star that his mother had ruined by dropping it. Going with Sheldon to Texas was a better idea than she originally thought.

"Hey Penny, Meemaw told me that she's almost done," Missy said as she entered the kitchen. "But knowin' Meemaw, it'll take about another ten minutes or so."

"It's fine, I'm still having tea—do you want some?" The blonde grabbed the box filled with tea bags, reaching it out to the brunette who politely declined. "Naw, it's alright. I'm already so full. How are ya liking our house? It's not fancy nor big, but I hope that ya like it either way."

Penny took a sip of the tea that took half an hour for Sheldon to look for the other day, "it's great! I've been so used to it only being me and the twins in our house that you guys are making me want to live here forever. I miss having more than three people under one roof."

Missy raised an eyebrow at her, "why? Doesn't Shelly ever visit this house of yers?"

The blonde shook her head as Missy took a seat on the chair opposite her, "no, not really. We're actually never together—we only see each other when I pick the twins up from his apartment. Other than that, we don't really hang out cause of my busy schedule. This is actually the first time that we all went somewhere together."

"Like a family?" Missy suggested, testing the waters.

"Uh… yeah, I guess," Penny slowly nodded into her mug; she guessed that this  _was_  some sort of odd family vacation. She just didn't want to bring it up—it was a bit too awkward to talk about it in front of the Coopers who might already be planning on how to get Sheldon to marry her without knowing it. "It's a bit weird to call us a family with our circumstances. We might be considered as a dysfunctional and unconventional one, though, not like those typical happy ones."

The brunette stared at her with the same blue eyes that Sheldon and Maddie had, "I'm just gonna go straight to the point—do you like my brother?"

Penny nearly choked on her tea, "what? Uh, he's my friend, so of course, I like him. But, we were never together, if you were wondering. It was just a drunken night that neither of us can barely remember—don't tell your mom!"

Missy raised her hands up as she laughed softly, "I won't tell her, don't worry." She sent the blonde a small smile before her expression turned serious. "What I meant was, did you ever like him? At all?"

Penny's eyes widened at the question, causing her to cough wildly. "Uh—well, I, uh… kinda had a small crush on him when we first met, then I got together with Leonard. Why?"

The brunette shrugged, "nothing really. None of us ever expected that the day that Shelly would actually have kids—that weren't made in a lab—would actually come. We always thought that he'd just grow old, and I'd have to take care of him. Momma thinks that yer Jesus' reward for her being so good all these years, and for her not putting glass shards in dad's meat loaf." Missy chuckled at the memory while Penny reminded herself to  _never_  make Mary Cooper angry. "Momma, Meemaw and I were talkin' earlier, and we all agreed that Shelly really loves yer kids. I could see it in the way the he looks at them. I once saw the three of ya on tv, and I had an odd feeling about them—but, I never expected it to be because I'm their aunt. Anotha' thing I saw on tv was that yer dating yer costar—s'that true?"

Penny shook her head, "no, it isn't. Well, I went out with him once, but I don't think that'd count as an actual date. He's nice, though. And yeah, Sheldon really loves the twins, and it makes me regret not telling him sooner. I love watching the three of them together—it just really makes me happy."

Missy nodded, resisting the urge to squeal in delight at the fact that Penny wasn't dating anyone. Now, her brother had an actual chance—and their mother would be forming a prayer circle for all of this to happen. "I heard from Momma that Shelly is seein' a girl named Amy; how's their relationship?"

"Uh, yeah… I'm not really sure if they're actually dating, but they're okay. They're a pair of really smart cookies."

"I see… last question; can ya see you, Shelly and the twins becomin' an actual family?" It was a good thing that Penny had finished her tea, or else she would have spit it all over Sheldon's twin sister. She was  _not_  expecting her to ask her the question that Gregg and Bailey (and practically everyone on Halfway There) teased her about. "I know for a fact that you care for our Shelly, cause if you didn't, you wouldn't have gone with him. Aaand, I know that Shelly really cares for ya—even if he has a super odd way of showin' it—cause he wouldn't have brought ya along if he didn't want ya here. He knows lots'a ways to get what he wants, ya know."

Penny placed the empty mug down as she cleared her throat that had run dry; the air suddenly becoming very uncomfortable. "Wow, that's a really tough question. It kinda makes me feel like I'm on Dr. Phil or something." She nervously chuckled, looking up to see Missy's anticipating gaze before sighing. "A lot of my friends at work ask me that question, and I really don't have an answer for that. I'm open to it, but me and Sheldon aren't really the best of friends. If it's for the twins' sake, I'd be okay with trying."

"Meemaw said that's it never good to use the children as an excuse," Missy confidently stated, "I have a hunch that my brother likes ya, deep inside those blindingly bright layers of clothin' and that metal shield he claims that he always has on. I can see it in the way he looks at you—under that scowl he always has on, of course, cause that's how he looks like whenever he likes somethin' that he says he doesn't. He only does it to me and Momma—and now, you!"

"Penny, dear," Meemaw sweetly called, right when Penny was about to respond, "I'm sorry I took a while, but I'm done. You can take yer shower, now."

Penny quickly stood up as Meemaw appeared, a warm small on her face. "Oh, okay, thanks." She glanced at Missy who gave her a look that said 'remember what I said' before exiting to the bathroom. She was going to think this one through.

"Did our plan work?" Mary asked from behind the door, finding her mother and daughter grinning at each other. "I didn't hear much, though."

Missy turned to her mother and smiled, "give it some time, and it's going to work. You'll be getting a new daughter-in-law in no time!"

The three Texans cheered silently; they already considered Penny as family, and would love for it to be official.

* * *

Sheldon had finally managed to get the twins to fall asleep when Penny returned from the bathroom. They were forced to share his bedroom—due to his mother getting angry at the thought that they would stay at a hotel rather than at her house—and he (at least) had managed to get two more beds in the room so that none of them would have to share one. He had no plans of sharing an overtly cramped twin bed with anyone. "Was your shower satisfactory?"

"Huh?" Penny dumbly asked, drying her hair with a towel.

"I was trying to engage you in pleasantries," he said as he moved to his bed on the other side of the room. "I thought that it was appropriate."

The blonde blinked at him, looking as if she hadn't comprehended what he asked. "Oh yeah, it was refreshing. You guys have a nice bathroom." She plopped down on her bed—which was on the opposite side of the room—and looked as if she was deep in thought. "So… your family had a better reaction than we originally thought. They're already planning on having us here during the holidays if they can't come to California."

Sheldon stared at her—checking to see if she was showing any signs of being sick—then grabbed his phone to check for new messages. "Kindly turn them down as I have no plans of spending any of the festivities, here. I moved to California for a reason, Penny, please keep that in mind whenever you consider going here for the holidays."

"Your Meemaw was the one who brought it up," he sharply turned to look at her and realized that she had been staring at him. She still looked deep in thought, and he had a feeling that it was—somehow—about him. Odd. "I've long decided that Meemaw should just spend the holidays with us—not the other way around." She was still staring at him. "Penny, you seem tense. I still have my elementary required flute in that desk behind you; would you like me to play some music in order to help you relax?"

Penny (finally) snapped out of her trance and looked around, "no, I'm fine. I just had something on my mind… so, this is your old room, huh?"

He frowned; this was their second—and final—night at his old house. Why was she asking such an asinine question that he didn't need to answer as it  _was_  his old room given the fact that he already has a 'new' one. Was it social convention of some sort? "If it isn't obvious enough, yes, it is. Though I feel that I shouldn't, I must ask; what is stuck on your mind that is keeping you from comprehending everything that I'm telling you? You look awfully distracted."

The blonde simply shook her head before swinging her legs on the bed. "Nothing, really, just something about the show." He saw her settling into her bed and was forced to prepare for sleep, as well. He knew that Penny didn't like having any type of illumination when she attempted to sleep, and would wake up if the lights were turned on. "Oh, and I was thinking that this was fun and that we should definitely do it again."

"Do what?" He asked, about to turn off the lamp.

"Bonding, duh," Penny said in the darkness, "I think we should have regular family bonding activities like this, from now on."

"Family bonding activities?" He stressed out the word 'family' because why would she even bring up something so random that only Raj—or his mother and sister—would use as a topic of discussion.

"Yup, family bonding activities and stuff," he heard her yawn, and resisted the urge to yawn as well. "Like going to the park, and wearing matching clothes or something. It would be nice, and will be good for the twins if we beca…"

Sheldon shifted to his side as he waited for Penny to continue, but was met by her light snoring. He thought about what she was chattering on about and wondered what she meant by all of it. Family bonding activities? Did she expect them to do what typical families did; like going to the park for a picnic and doing recreational activities together? Somehow… he couldn't see himself partaking in any kind of activities akin to that and decided to let it go. There was no use in pondering about such trivial matters when he could just be thinking of what to get the twins for their near birthday.

Unless… his mother had gotten to Penny and was forcing her to marry him!

But, that was a bit unlikely since she was the on who pointed out that him marrying Penny was of no use, and would only interfere with her career. It was highly improbable that that was what Penny was thinking about, and he shrugged the thought off. She was probably just thinking about what pair of shoes she was going to buy or something. He didn't care—them being an actual family was out of the question and was just his mother's delusional demand that he marry her to 'correct' his sins. Aside from being co-parents—and friends, he guessed—there would never be anything between him and the blonde.

… Or something.

* * *

"Their second birthday is next Friday—here's the invitation," Penny handed Mary the themed invitation as she shifted Maddie to her hip, "and I hope that all of you can come. The details are all there, but if you need to ask me about it, feel free to call me up. "

Mary grinned, handing the invitation to Missy as Sheldon dragged their luggage out of the house. "Of course I'll come—but, I think I'll be the only one who can. Meemaw is goin' to watch over Junior's kids while he and Kelsey are at Oklahoma for a business trip, and Missy here has used up all her day offs."

Missy grumbled beside her, "I'll try to go, but that might be hard with my boss always chewin' me out for bein' late most of the time. I can't even go on a date without that grumpy woman reprimandin' me that I can't jus' take a day off for a date. But, I'll try to find a way."

"I can't argue with your boss with how tardy you are," Sheldon hissed, grabbing Andy who was skipping around them. "You didn't even go to work during the entire three days that we were here—I'm surprised that you're not out of a job, yet."

Meemaw immediately moved in between Sheldon and the now seething Missy, "now, now, let's not embarrass ourselves in front of Penny, shall we? I'm sure that Moonpie didn't mean anythin' by what he said, Sugar Cake." Missy stepped back and Meemaw hugged Sheldon and Andy. "I'm sorry I won't be able to go, Moonpie, but I promise to make it up to ya."

Sheldon's frown softened as his grandmother softly patted his cheek, "it's alright, Meemaw. I just hope that you can spend some time with us, again."

"Andy wanna be wid Meema, Gammy and Aunteh Missy, again, too!" Andy happily exclaimed as Meemaw planted a kiss on his forehead. "Tesas da bestest!"

"It best, not bestest," Maddie corrected from their mother's arms, reaching her arms out to Meemaw, "and Maddie gonna miss Meema and Gammy and Aunteh Missy and Uncah Junyah and Aunteh Kesey and Phip and Oksie!"

"Visit us, too, pwease?" Andy added, grinning as their aunt and grandmother moved to give both of them a hug and a kiss. "We gots a big house—we stay togedah, again!"

Mary placed a hand on her grandson's head, smoothing his blonde hair down. "I promise to visit the both of ya, soon, and we can all stay together in that big house of yers."

Meemaw gave her grandson a small smile, "Moonpie, you are a father now, I hope that yer goin' to take good care of Penny, here, and the twins—or else I'm not goin' to make you cookies, okay?"

The physicist nodded obediently, "though, I'm sure that Penny can perfectly handle herself on her own, I will do my best to take care of the twins. Please don't stop making cookies. They're my favorite, and even the twins and Penny loved them."

"And that's why I made you a batch for the road," Meemaw grabbed a plastic box and handed it to her grandson, "I made them extra special jus' for the four of ya. Now, why don't ya go and put the rest of yer stuff in the car while we ladies talk?"

"Oh alright, but just because you made me cookies," Sheldon happily sighed, putting Andy down, taking Maddie from Penny and dragging the last of their luggage out to the street where the rental was parked.

Mary walked over to the blonde and gave her a tight hug, "thank ya for giving me grandchildren, Penny, dear. Ya don't know how much I prayed to Jesus for that to happen," she smiled at her as she stepped back, "I never expected it to be you, but I'm glad that it's you. Yer the living proof that Jesus gives ya more than ya ask for!"

"I'm not really sure if that's a compliment, but thank you. I never thought that I'd have kids with Sheldon, too, if that helps," Penny said with an unsure smile. "It just sorta happened."

"A lota things sorta just happen," Missy offered, smirking as Penny remembered their talk from the previous night. "Just give Shelly some time, and I'm sure that he'll come around. If he doesn't, I'll deal with him."

Penny drew her chin back at surprise as the three Texans mischievously grinned at her as if they had some sort of devious plan already in progress. "Uh, I don't really like—"

"Nonsense, Penny, dear," Meemaw interjected, waving a hand in dismissal, "I can see it in the way ya care for my Moonpie, and I'm happy that he has someone like you to shake him every once in a while. I hope that ya don't give up on him anytime soon—he's a piece of work, but he's worth it in the end. He jus' needs time."

Mary pulled the blonde in for one last hug, "and you should come back anytime. You're a Cooper, now, and you can just call me momma."

Penny blinked, stepping back once Mary released her from the hug. When Sheldon first told her that he was going to tell his family about the twins, she expected them to all hate her and be angry at what she did. Instead, they all assumed that she was the slightest bit in love with Sheldon—and vice versa—and she had no idea how she was supposed to tell them that he practically hated her. Seriously. "I'm not really a Cooper…"

"But you will be soon enough," Missy added in, smiling brightly at her. "Trust me on it, Penny. My hunches are  _never_  wrong."

"Penny, the twins are already in their car seats and our plane leaves at one," Sheldon announced in annoyance as he returned from the car, "if we don't leave now, we might get stuck in heavy traffic. Apologies for interrupting, but we really must go." He gave his mother and grandmother a hug then simply stared at his twin sister, "I hope to see all three of you at the twins' birthday, and I shall notify you once we reach the airport. Now, Penny, lets go—I don't want to be late."

Penny quickly gave each of the woman a hug before Sheldon gently grabbed her wrist, "uh, thanks for allowing us to stay here! See you guys, soon!"

The three women all watched as Sheldon nearly dragged the new (soon) addition to their family out to the rental with a smile.

She was going to become a Cooper soon enough, and all they had to do was wait for it to happen.


	16. Royal Questions

_"So, Penny has been spotted in LAX with her twins and their mystery father." A guy with dreadlocks started, the screen switching to a picture of Penny with Sheldon and the twins behind her._

_"Did we finally find out who he is? We've been trying to know for the longest time now." The main host asked, leaning over his desk._

_The first man nodded, reading something on the paper he was holding. "A source told me that his name is Dr. Sheldon Cooper. He's a physicist and considered to be one of the smartest minds alive. He's seriously smart, it's scary."_

_"So we have a name and a face. What else do you have?"_

_"Well, they were spotted in the DFW hours later and we managed to ask some questions." The screen switched to a camera shot video of a big crow gathering around Penny who was taking pictures with fans._

_"Penny! Penny! Over here!"_

_"Hi guys," Penny greeted, stopping to sign a few autographs._

_"Is it true that the guy you're with is the twins' father?"_

_"Yes he is, and I hope that you respect his privacy, okay guys? Thank you!" She gave the cameraman a smile before moving to the next fans who wanted a picture then the screen turned back to the studio._

_"Who would have expected the twins' to be the Einstein of the 21st century? I thought that he was some random dude." The main host chuckled, scribbling something on his clipboard._

_"Can't it get any more random than a genius and an actress?"_

_"Whatever you say, I think they look great together." A woman piped in, "I'm all for happy families and all that jazz. Everyone seems to be breaking up these days, and I'd like someone to get back together before the balance is ruined!"_

_"Isn't Penny dating Collin Harris?" A guy asked, looking at a piece of paper. "They were seen out together in Paris while shooting Hindsight." The screen showed a picture of Penny and her costar eating at a restaurant. "See? They seem happy."_

_"Can't friends be happy and eat together?" The woman suggested, causing cheers to emit from some of the other reporters. "I think they're just friends and that she's really dating the Sheldon guy."_

_"No, she's with Collin," another man interjected, "several sources have been saying that she is."_

_"Maybe she dated him while they were in France, but that doesn't mean that they're still together! She's with this new guy, I'm telling you."_

_"This is the first time we've even heard of them! There's been rumors of Penny and Collin for months now!"_

_"You haven't heard of him because Penny has been keeping his identity a secret for his privacy! Not everyone is a celebrity, and not all celebrities end up with celebrities"_

_"No, no, they end up with other celebrities—then they get divorced and marry non celebrities. It's a trend."_

_"Okay, lets finish the discussion here!" The main host cut in, "or else there might be a bloodbath and we don't need that. So, what do we have on Jennifer Lawrence?"_

* * *

Mary Cooper stared at the television for another moment before turning to her grumpy son and smacking him on his arm. "See what ya did! If ya only married Penny in time, there wouldn't be any trouble!"

Sheldon frowned at his mother, "why are you taking Penny's side? I'm your son—and I'm not the only one who caused this. It was Penny who forced me to fly out with her and that she reveals my identity! I have nothing to do with this and am the victim, here."

"It's cause ya never even made an effort to contact Penny and allowed yer anger to take over yer sweet friendship," Mary huffed in indignation.

"Actually," Leonard started, grabbing a handful of lace, "Sheldon emailed her every week for an entire month but Penny didn't want to respond because she thought that he hated her."

Mary turned to her son and hissed, "why did ya make my future daughter-in-law feel like ya hated her even though ya don't?"

The theoretical physicist sucked through his teeth, attempting to stay calm. His mother had been in town for two days and had been talking non stop on how he should marry Penny. It was getting frustrating and there was just so much badgering he could take before he got angry. "Penny is not your daughter-in-law and she will never be your daughter-in-law. Please stop saying that I'm going to marry her as Leonard growing another six inches is more probable than that happening."

"Penny's actually supposedly dating someone—like what they said on tv. His name is Collin, I think," Leonard piped in, handing his roommate a water bottle. "They say that it's been going on for months, now."

"Ya don't know that," Mary confidently stated, causing her son to roll his eyes, "those nosey roseys only know gossip that has little truth in it. I have a feelin' that Penny's in love with our Shelly. Or something."

Groaning, Sheldon stood from his spot and marched towards his desk. "Why must you keep insisting on such an idiotic and impossible matter? She is not, and I do not like Penny like that."

"Yer crazy if ya don't like her, Shelly"

"I'm not crazy— _you_  had me tested," he corrected, opening his email. He loved his mother—he really did—but at the rate things were going, he might have to kick her out of the apartment.

"Yes… but we didn't take that follow up test in Houston, remember?" Mary reminded, sounding thoughtful.

Sheldon snarled, clawing the edge of his desk before turning to his mother, "you know what—"

"Okay, let's all calm down!" Leonard interjected, jumping in front of the fuming Sheldon. "Why don't we all take a deep breath and take a look at our finished costumes!" He grabbed the rack where their handmade costumes hung and pulled it towards the mother and son. "Sheldon, I've fixed the chain mail on your knight costume, so now it doesn't bunch up together and make that scratching noise you hate." He took the dark colored knight costume and handed it to his roommate then lifted up the dark orange dress, "here is your noblewoman costume, Mrs. Cooper, suitable for the mother of the greatest knight that ever lived." He handed her the dress then pointed to the similar knight costume, "and me as one of Sheldon's loyal knights. The party is in two hours, instead of bickering why don't we get ready?"

Sheldon eyed his costume and scowled, "I don't know… we're not even sure if the theme is medieval or renaissance—I should change my costume for something more neutral."

Mary placed her costume on the armchair, "ya should have just gone as the king. Yer the twins' father, that means yer the king."

"I am a  _knight_ , mother," he corrected, placing his costume beside his shield and sword. It took him a whole week to make his costume, and had Penny not joined in his trip to Texas, he would have been able to continue it there. Sadly, she had, and he had to ask Leonard to fix the chain mail for him. "I am a knight and nothing more."

Leonard chuckled from the side, "yeah, but knights don't get huge discounts in renting the entire tournament park for their children's birthday, then there's you. Kinda sounds royal to me."

"I am the greatest knight in the entire country," Sheldon snapped at his roommate who was grinning at him, "it's not novel for me to get discounts from the university. Now, wipe that smirk off your face and get ready for the party."

This was going to be a  _long_  day.

* * *

Sheldon had to hand it to Penny; she had a knack for planning parties. Even if he still wasn't sure if the theme was medieval or renaissance.

"You've really got hand it to Penny," Howard the colorful—and somewhat fitting—jester remarked as they stood in the middle of the party grounds. "She got all of this made even though you guys were in Texas. There are like ten bounce castles, an archery area, party tents that I'm dying to check and there's going to be a fire juggler, too! This is even better than the renaissance fair we always go to."

Raj—another one of Sheldon's loyal knights—nodded in agreement, stabbing his sword down on the grass. The ale that one of the organizers gave him and his awesome outfit made him feel like he really was in the medieval-slash-renaissance period. "Not to mention that long ass table filled with food! Did you see how  _big_  that turkey is? How long until we realize that we aren't in 2012 anymore?"

Bernadette fixed the bells strapped on the waist of her gypsy outfit and hummed, "Penny's actually been planning this party even before she went to France. It's pretty amazing to finally see her visions come to life."

"That's right," Amy added, smoothing down the skirt of her noblewomen (or princess with the shiny tiara on her head) costume, "this is truly the best birthday party I've ever been to. And it's pretty awesome how I'm at a celebrity's party—and with all of the security guarding this place, I kinda feel like a celebrity myself. Sheldon, have you complimented Penny about this?" Amy turned and found Sheldon a few steps away whispering something to Leonard. "Sheldon?"

"Huh?" Sheldon glanced over his shoulder while gesturing something to his roommate. "Oh, no, I haven't spoken to Penny, yet. She might still be getting ready." The darkly dressed knight frowned, placing his real looking sword on his shoulder. "Or she might be here. Or something. We'll see her eventually."

Raj raised an eyebrow at Sheldon's distractedness but shook it away once he saw someone approaching them. "Hey, there's Penny right now! Ooh, and she's so pretty! Hi Penny!"

Penny grinned as she made her way towards the group, "hi guys, I love your costume!" She fixed the golden crown on top of her flowing blonde hair while checking their outfits. "You guys look awesome."

Leonard lifted his wrist to check his watch and whistled, "uh, drat. I forgot my gift at the apartment—is it okay if I go for a bit? I'll come back right away."

"Yeah sure, the party doesn't start in an hour in a half, anyway." Penny said, looking at Leonard's watch. "Just be back before the twins make their big entrance! It took me two whole days to organize the way the arrive. It's gonna be awesome!" The experimental physicist waved at them before scurrying out of the park.

"Okay question," Raj started, pulling the toy sword out of the dirt as a handful of burly men surrounded the area. "Why are there so many security personnel? They're so big that it's scary!"

Penny turned to the entrance where the security—who were dressed up as steel armored knights—team were setting up. "Well, there are gonna be a lot of celebrity friends who are coming. There's everyone from Halfway There, Hindsight, the Truth About Life and other friends I've made. My agent told me that the security are here so that no paparazzi will be able to get in. There's security scattered around the whole Tournament Park and around the neighborhood just to make sure.

Amy made a strangled shriek before leaping towards Penny and hugging her. "Oh! I feel like such a celebrity! Thank you, Penny!"

"I have a question, too," Bernadette said, raising a hand, "why is there an inflatable halfway sunken Titanic slide?"

"Yeah… that," Penny murmured, "that was supposed to be a dragon slide, but something went wrong with the order and they gave me that. It's a bit too off theme, but I kept it anyway. If I wasn't the queen, I'd be trying it out." She shrugged before glancing at Sheldon and noticing his dark colored outfit. "Why the dark outfit, Sheldon?"

The theoretical physicist glanced down at his nearly all black knight costume then back at the queen. "I'm the dark knight, if it's not obvious."

Amy nodded, moving from beside Penny to stand next to Sheldon. "I actually convinced him that we should go as a knight and a noblewoman with a secret. He said yes, then he thought that it would be 'cooler' if he was a dark knight, a reference to the dark knight. So… he's the dark knight and I'm just a pretty noblewoman—that's secretly a princess from a far off land—passing by, my queen."

Penny furrowed her eyebrows as Amy bowed slightly, smacking Sheldon on the arm so that he would bow, too. "Uh, you guys don't have to bow—I'm not really a queen, and we're all friends here." She placed her hands on Amy's arms and helped her straighten her posture—Amy beaming and muttering that she was such a kind queen—then moved to Sheldon who was sending her a scowl. "Perk up, sweetie, I promise to give you the award for best costume."

Sheldon rolled his eyes while he dusted off the imaginary lint on his arm. "Of course, I'd get best costume. Only I had the clever idea of becoming the dark knight in the dark ages. Or renaissance—whatever theme you chose."

"Ah! Penny!" Mary called, one hand lifting the end of her gown and the other carrying a plate full of food. "There's my daughter-in-law!"

Amy turned to Sheldon with wide eyes, "daughter-in-law?"

Penny could barely react before Mary pulled her into a tight hug, "hi Mary, I'm sorry I haven't visited you arrived back. I've been so busy with the party planning that this is the first I've actually relaxed in weeks."

"Well, all yer efforts weren't in vain, this party is amazin'!" Mary complimented, handing her plate of food to Howard, "I took a head start on the buffet table and I must say; ya have great taste in food!"

Raj moved next to Bernadette to whisper, "I knew that the food was delicious. There goes my diet."

"I'm glad you liked it—actually, Mary, I was meaning to tell you something," Penny said as she pulled away from the Texan's embrace, "my dad is here, and I'd really like you to meet him." Penny turned towards the dark clothed knight and frowned, "he wants to meet you, too. Just a heads up." She took her phone out of her pocket and her frown deepened, "and he's on his way here."

Bernadette plucked a strip of turkey and took a bite on it before stepping beside Howard and Raj. "Why don't we make a bet, boys."

"A bet?" Raj asked curiously.

"Yeah, let's bet on whether or not Penny's dad will like Sheldon or not. I'm betting two hundred bucks that Sheldon and Penny's dad will be the best of friends."

Howard hummed, "a bet on whether or not Penny's dad will kill Sheldon or not. Guess I'm in; three hundred dollars that her dad will kill him. Metaphorically, of course."

Raj glanced at Penny who was talking to Mary about something and Sheldon still looking deep in thought while Amy fixed his costume. The physicist had been extremely less annoying the whole time, and it made him wonder what his problem was. It probably had something to do with Penny and the twins, and he hoped that it wasn't too big to solve. Not only was he the president of the Pence fan club, he was also the captain of the SS Sheldon and Penny. "Penny's not gonna let her dad kill him metaphorically or literally. I bet five hundred dollars that this is going to end well."

"Deal," Howard announced, shaking the others' hands, "I am so gonna be rich after this. Now, Bernie, why don't we go check those really anachronistic carnival games over there? I'd like to get that giant knight." Bernadette shrugged and followed the colorful man to the tents filled with games; leaving Raj with the others.

"—Sheldon, relax, my dad's not gonna kill you," Penny reassured as Sheldon paced in front of them. "Not with me around."

Sheldon grumbled, stopping and whirling around to frown at the three women. "I am not afraid that your father will kill me, for your information. I am an esteemed physicist and something as silly as your father confronting me will not frighten me at a—" he paused once he felt a heavy hand on his shoulder and gulped as the person behind him spoke.

"So, you're this Sheldon that never even bothered to be in my grandchildren's lives," Wyatt gruffly said frowning down at Sheldon. "You have some nerve showing up here."

Penny groaned before making her way towards her father, "don't scare him, dad. He's here cause I told him to be here and he wants to be here."

"That's a start," Wyatt snarled, extending his hand out to Sheldon. "So… nice to meet you."

Sheldon eyed the hand and nodded timidly in response, "yes… I've heard very little about you, but it is nice to make your acquaintance." He gestured to Mary then to Amy who was waving at them, "this is my mother and my friend, Amy."

Mary stepped forward and shook Wyatt's hand. "I'm Shelly's mother, but ya'll can just call me Mary. It's nice to meet the both of ya."

Wyatt stared at the Texan; observing her for a moment before grinning. "It's nice to meet you, too, Mary. My wife was looking forward to being here and meeting you, but there were some problems with our son, Mark, in rehab, so she had to stay back. She would've loved to see the twins' second birthday."

"I'm pretty excited, too," Mary admitted with a small chuckle, "this'll be the first time that I'll be able to attend my grandchildren's birthday and it just makes me bubble up with glee. I blame my Shelly for me not meetin' my sweet angels from the start!"

"I blame him, too!" Wyatt chortled, causing Sheldon to scowl from the side, "you shoulda seen the twins' first birthday in Nebraska, Mary! You'd love it—my wife made the cakes and the pies and it was just a blast. Have you tried the food, here? It's nothing compared to my wife's cooking, but you'll like it!" He gestured to the buffet table before guiding Mary towards it.

Penny stared dumbly as her father and Mary started chatting happily at the buffet table. "Okay, what the hell just happened?"

"I believe they instantly got along," Amy answered, watching as Wyatt pulled out his wallet to show Mary pictures of the twins. "

"It must be a grandparent thing," Raj noted, glancing around the park, "talking about grandchildren is already an ice breaker—think about how much of a discussion they'd have when they have the same grandchildren."

"Interesting… my mother saved me from your father badgering me on how I supposedly ruined your life," Sheldon sighed, loosening the ties of his cape, "maybe miracles do happen."

"Don't be too sure of that, sweetie. The party's barely started and my dad isn't going anywhere with him having two full years of issues that he wants to discuss with you." The queen warned the knight who winced, "in other news, guests are arriving! The party has officially started!"

Sheldon shook his head as Penny her way to the entrance, "it's official, I hate parties." He took in a wistful breath as Amy patted him on the back; the party had barely started and he was already exhausted.

* * *

"Okay, that's me with George Clooney, Scarlet Johansen, Angelina Jolie, Khloe Kardashian and that kid from the kid show on Nickelodeon." Raj said as Amy peered over his shoulder to look at his phone, "I haven't got the courage to ask for a picture with anyone else, so I was hoping that you could help me."

Amy handed him her phone and snorted, "you already have five pictures with celebrities—I barely even had the chance to get one with Penny. All I have is a picture with the Kardashian girl. What is she famous for, again?"

"For being fabulous," Raj replied, putting his phone back into his pocket as Sheldon returned to the table. Sheldon hated anachronisms unless they were for spot the difference games, and he'd flip if he saw his phone. "Heeey, Sheldon, where have you been? You missed tons of celebrities."

Sheldon crossed his arms over his chest, "where have I been? Well, for the past twenty minutes various people have been asking me nonstop if it was true that I am the twins' father. And those celebrities you're talking about? They pestered me, too. It's all 'hey, are you really Penny's boyfriend?' and 'wow you're taller in person, nice outfit—so, you're the twins' dad, huh?' It's exasperating and had this not been my progeny's birthday, I would have left already." He huffed, readjusting his cape before sitting down on the picnic table, "the worst part is that some people didn't even bother to dress up, and eighty percent that did are either a prince or a princess. How annoying."

Amy sent Raj a look before taking a seat opposite the grumbling knight, "cheer up, Sheldon. Everyone's having fun and it's a great party, I'm sure that the twins are going to enjoy it more than you think. Plus, with all these celebrities passing by and interacting as if we were all normal people, it's impossible to not have fun."

Raj nodded, resisting the urge to show Sheldon the pictures, "dude, if I had a camera—which I don't cause there were no cameras at the time except for that one at the photo booth—I would've gotten pictures with everyone. Shame that I don't."

"I saw you taking a picture with Scarlet Johansen on your phone," Sheldon snarled, scowling at the astrophysicist. "And with those other people I don't know that kept badgering me about Penny. Stop lying. Although, you're not the only one who is forgetting that we are set in a time where electricity hadn't even been invented, so I'll let you off the hook." He brought a hand up to his forehead and started massaging his his temples, "we've barely been here for an hour and now I really want to leave."

"Dude, relax. You're here for the twins, not anyone else." Raj reminded him, pushing a plate full of corn towards him, "have some corn! I'd offer you some mead, but you don't drink."

Amy grabbed a cob of corn and offered it to Sheldon, "Rajesh is right; you shouldn't get too worked up over simple things. The twins aren't even here yet, and you already want to go home. You should just focus on being here for the twins rather than everything that annoys you. Like how that Titanic slide is  _so_  out of place."

Sheldon heaved a sigh, seeing his mother approach their table at the corner of his eye. "I guess you're right. I am here for the sole purpose of finally being of attendance at my progeny's birthday, not for anything else." He gave Amy and Raj a small smile as Mary plopped down in front of him, a goblet of what he guessed was ale in her hand. "Mom, I see you're enjoying yourself."

Mary raised her goblet and winked at him, "ya bet I am. Those harp players are amazing, those fire eaters are goin' straight to hell and the food is lovely—and I can have as much as'a want! I shoulda thought of somethin' like this for the three of ya's birthdays." She took a sip of her drink and grinned. "So, Shelly, where's Penny?"

"She went back to the trailer to check on the twins," Sheldon answered uninterestedly, pondering on whether or not he should have some corn. "They're a bit cranky and they have to arrive soon. The guests are all here."

"Oh, alright," Mary chirped, taking a piece of corn and biting down on it, "and where's this Collin guy everyone's whisperin' about?"

"I don't know who Collin is, mom," Sheldon hissed, wishing that his mom just stayed in Texas, "please leave me alone."

Amy pulled her phone out of her pocket and showed it to Mary, "I've been researching him for a while now, and this is what he looks like."

Mary gasped, "he's pretty good lookin'! Shelly, come over here and see the competition!"

Sheldon glared at the three who were sitting side by side to see the picture, "this is the medieval-renaissance period! There were no phones, or google, or actors then! Put that away!"

Raj raised a skeptical eyebrow as Sheldon started grumbling inaudibly while Amy and Mary gushed over how 'dreamy' Collin was. If he hadn't known better, he would think that Sheldon was showing even the slightest hint of jealousy. But since he had known the guy for practically ten years, he knew that Sheldon was irritated by everything around him. Regardless, he was really hoping that he wasn't right—Leonard, Bernadette and Howard was going to make him richer if the 'shenny'—as they decided to call them—was going to end up together. About two thousand dollars richer, if things went as well as he hoped.

"Sheldon!" A familiar voice called, causing Sheldon to flinch before said voice practically hugged him to death.

"Gregg, get off of him," Bailey monotonously said as she appeared behind the flamboyant man. "Penny will kill you if you kill him."

Gregg immediately stepped back from Sheldon and fixed his—for the first time ever, Raj noted—floppy light brown hair. "I'm sorry, I was just really happy to see our dear friend Sheldon. Especially with him all dressed up like that." Gregg stared at Sheldon then at Bailey's dark themed gown. "Wow, you guys really are twins. I'm a handsome prince from a far off country while he two of you are like the grim reaper duo with all that black and gray you're wearing."

"And what exactly are you supposed to be?" Sheldon asked, eying the typical dark colored clothes (gown) that the dark haired actress was wearing. "This is a second birthday party, and Halloween was last week."

Bailey snorted, picking up an apple in the centerpiece and taking a bite off of it. "Hardy har har, you're looking a bit dark yourself, grim reaper. I am a witch, cause I had a feeling that no one was going to be a witch. It's a bit fitting, to be honest."

"She loves to be the antagonist, you know," Gregg chuckled, pushing back his hair that flopped over his eyes before noticing two brunettes staring at him. "Hi, I'm Gregg Wilkes, and this gloomy person beside me is Bailey Mckenzie. We're Penny's friends." He extended a hand out to Mary who smiled at him. "Hello, I'm Mary, Shelly's moth—"

Mary was quickly cut off by Amy leaping from the other side of the table and lunging towards Gregg. "You're Gregg from Halfway There! You're bestie's bestie!" Amy excitedly exclaimed, hugging him before moving to Bailey. "And you're Bailey—wow, you're so much prettier in person! After an entire month, I finally get to meet both of you! Can we pose twelve times to make a calendar?!"

Bailey wheezed as Amy hugged her tightly, her eyes falling on Sheldon who was deeply scowling. "Someone… get her… off me… I can't… breathe!"

"Uh, Amy, dear, let go of her."

"Bailey you're turning blue! This is the first time I've seen you in another skin color other than pale and sickly!"

"Oh my god, Amy, let go off Bailey! You might kill her!"

Sheldon cursed inwardly as his mother, Raj and Gregg started to make a commotion over Amy suffocating Bailey with admiration. How was he going to be able to get some peace of mind with everyone either pestering him or annoying him to no bounds? He didn't know why he was in such a bad mood, but it was there and he was getting frustrated with every second that passed that he didn't know what was troubling him. It was nerve wracking and he was doing his best not to make a scene.

With a huff, he stood from the table and walked off to a quieter part of the park. He couldn't think with all the madness going around.

* * *

The party still hadn't started when Sheldon found a quieter part of the park. It wasn't far, but due to it being unused, there was practically no one in the area.

Which was exactly what he wanted, because barely an hour and a half into the party, he already wanted to leave. He was getting sick and tired of the random strangers asking him foolish questions about Penny that had absolutely  _nothing_  to do with him. They asked questions that ranged from whether or not he was dating Penny to what he thought about Penny's new movie. Ever since they were seen in Texas together, he was stalked and pestered nonstop by people he never even met and it made him regret ever agreeing to taking Penny along to Texas.

He had absolutely no problem with Penny—she was actually more tolerable now than two years ago—and actually enjoyed her presence. What he hated was all the attention he got that he did not ask for. He wanted to be known for his incredible contributions in the world of science, not as the 'mystery guy' that went to Texas with Penny! Even the people at the university started inquiring about his relationship with the blonde. President Siebert even gave him a bonus for giving the university additional exposure with his name getting brought up every time those inane gossip shows mentioned Penny's romantic life!

Ever since their Texas trip, he was recognized by everyone everywhere. The other day while he and Leonard were grocery shopping, an elderly woman went up to him and smacked him with a rolled up newspaper. Then she scolded him on how he was horrible for not being supportive in Penny's career and helping her with the twins. He didn't even know that he had children until two months ago! How was he supposed to be supportive when he didn't have a single clue about anything? The jeering he got constantly was making him want to move to a country that had no idea on who Penny was and just start a new lif—

"Hey, Sheldon!"

He seriously  _could not_  catch a break.

"What are the two of you doing here?" He spat as Penny's annoying (they would never not be) sat beside him because they seemed to enjoy his misery. "Aren't you supposed to mingle with your other celebrity friends instead of annoying me to a great extent?"

Bailey snickered, "how charming. It's like he never wants us to leave,"

Gregg poked his friend before turning to the brooding knight, "don't mind her, she's rude because she likes you! Anyway, we're here cause we thought that you might need some company. You look a bit lonely, Mr. Genius."

"It's  _Doctor_  Genius, and just for today I am  _Sir_  Genius." Sheldon corrected, scooting away from the intruding actors. "I am also not in need of any company—you may return to whatever activity you were doing before deciding on doing your favorite hobby; annoying me."

The flamboyant man blinked at him and awkwardly cleared his throat. "A bit harsh, but I was expecting that. We just wanted to catch up with you and try to cheer you up. You look a bit down, and we'd love to do something about it."

Bailey grimaced at her friend's words, "that sounded… oddly wrong. Don't do it again." She patted Gregg on his shoulder before transferring to Sheldon's other side. "Listen, Penny had to go back to the trailer because of something her dad to and asked the two of us to watch over you and we did. By asking your friends to watch over you. Sadly, your roommate is nowhere to be found, the happy couple are too busy watching the magic show while your mother and Penny's number one fans are all hogging the photo booth—which left us with the task of watching you. So… how are ya?"

"I was fine until you bothered me," Sheldon snarled, prying Gregg's hand—that mysteriously started to pat his head—off of his person. "Where is Penny and why aren't the twins here yet? The party started an hour and a half ago, they should already be here."

"I already told you," Bailey interjected, lightly flicking Sheldon's shoulder, "she's at the trailer because her dad asked her to go. Something about his costume. I thought that you had eidetic memory and Vulcan hearing? Doesn't seem like it to me."

Gregg quickly bolted form his spot and moved in between his two dark haired—and this was based on his own opinion—friends before they killed each other with the way Bailey was teasing Sheldon and the murderous glint in his eyes. "Digressing from that little joke, why don't we talk about you!"

Sheldon groaned, muttering almost inaudibly, "how unsurprising."

"So, what's the deal with you and this Amy girl?" Gregg interrupted, grinning widely at the scowling knight. "She seems nice, and she's pretty! How did you meet? Are you together? Do you love her? Are you getting married? Will you invite me and Bailey to the wedding? Will you invite Penny to the wedding?"

Literally  _everywhere_  he went the only thing people got curious about was gossip and even more nonsensical gossip. This day was getting worse and worse. "Though, I owe you no explanation whatsoever on anything regarding my personal life, it occurs to me that the only way that I will be able to get you to stop pestering me—as I strongly believe that if I do not answer your question clearly now, you will take any chance you get to ask me again—is to give a response and end this incessant game of twenty questions that everyone I encounter seems to enjoy so much." Sheldon watched Gregg nod obediently while Bailey simply clucked her tongue. "Alright, then. My answers are as follows; we met via Raj and Howard setting us up in a dating site, no, we are friends, no, no and no. Are you happy, now?"

Bailey and Gregg exchanged a look then turned back to respond at the same time, "nope."

"Fine. I'll allow you one last question."

"Is she really just your friend?" Gregg asked, doubt evident in the tone of his voice. "I mean; it seems like she really likes you, you know."

Sheldon pinched the bridge of his nose as an attempt to lighten the headache that had started to appear. "Amy Farrah Fowler is my friend, nothing more. We are just intellectual colleagues that have compatible IQs that allows us to interact better with each other that with anyone else. There is no romantic connection like what you are implying—let this be the last time that we discuss this."

"Crappy answer, but I just checked my phone and Penny texted me, looking for you," Bailey informed them, typing away on her phone. "I told her where we are and she's on her way here. The trailer's actually not far from here." She placed a hand over her eyebrows and looked around as Sheldon continued to grumble about how the day could not get any worse. "And there she is! Penny, over here! The stupid greatest knight in the entire land is sulking over here!"

Penny waved at them before lifting the end of her skirt and skipping towards them, a bright grin that Sheldon swore was practically blinding. "There you are Sheldon! I've been looking for you everywhere—it's a good thing that Bailey has her phone, or else I'd never have found you." She stopped in front of them, releasing her rich, emerald skirt that seemed fitting for the role of a queen. Queen Penelope, AFK. How nostalgic. "What are you doing all the way over here? The party's over there," she pointed to the middle of the park where the people roamed about; adults either eating or chatting about all of the celebrities present while the children played about in the bounce castles. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, please do not worry about me," he answered, scooting backwards so that his and both Bailey's and Gregg's shoulders wouldn't touch. "The number of people surrounding me was suffocating, so I decided to have some air over here where I can see everything going on without having to be near all those… people. Then these two thought of bothering me, and now I'm suffocating again."

"Rude, rude, rude, but since you're my friend, I'll let it pass!" Gregg chirped, laughing happily. "We're here to entertain you, okay?"

Bailey winced, moving to the other side of the bench, "I already told you, Gregg, stop with the odd phrases."

"Anyway, I came here to tell you that the twins are almost ready and I want you to stand beside me while they make their big entrance. I got the security knights to all stand opposite each other while raising their swords as the twins arrive. And we're," she gestured to herself then to Sheldon, "going to walk behind them cause that's how royalty appear. Doesn't it sound great?"

Sheldon frowned, "why exactly must I be there?"

The blonde drew back a little, her previous perkiness immediately dying down. "Cause we're their parents and it would be cool? I thought that you were going to go as the king or something, but Sheldor the Conqueror is still awesome." She sent him a small smile which he didn't return and Penny sighed. "You know? Like in Age of Conan when we were Queen P and Sheldor? We kicked butt there, and it's kind of the reason why I chose the theme. Except now I'm the active queen instead of the ruthless runaway queen that can kill a group of Europeans who have been playing for years at level thirty-seven and you're the badass knight-slash-vigilante guy. Cool how things change, huh?"

So, that was why Penny suddenly chose the medieval-renaissance theme for the twins' party; because it reminded her of her Age of Conan addiction days. It was oddly touching how she remembered those dark days when she bothered him nonstop on how to finish quests while forgetting the fact that she had a life outside the game. He didn't think that Penny would even find that occurrence somewhat sentimental. How… unexpected. "Yes, it is what you call 'cool' with the extreme changes between then and now. Regardless, I believe I will decline your offer as I am happier way up here than down there where it's all cramped and claustrophobic. I have a great view up here."

Penny stared at him with wide eyes as Gregg dramatically gasped beside him. "What? What do you mean that you don't want to go there with us? Sheldon, this is  _your_  children's birthday, too! Can't you at least make an effort to join in with us? They've been dying to have you here and you'd rather sit here than pretend—even for a minute—that you're part of this?"

The dark armored knight avoided her angry gaze, directing his attention down to the grass. "Penny, you know very well that I detest crowds with more than fifteen people in it. There are around a hundred guests—hundred fifty if you include the children—present. It is not that I don't want to take part, I simply refuse to be surrounded by a hundred strangers that may trample me if I don't answer their questions correctly." He glanced up to find Penny sending him a venomous glare that he had only seen once; when they were in the middle of the infamous war of '08. "The twins know that I'm happy to be here, even if I don't turn myself into a fool."

Penny hissed at him, "god, Sheldon, you are seriously the biggest jerk in the world. I don't know why I even try, but what I'm sure is that you suck." She shook her head before storming back to the party grounds where some of her colleagues immediately approached her.

"Good job, Mr. Genius," Bailey sarcastically said, earning a dirty look from Sheldon, "you just angered the queen. It's a bit surprising that she didn't revoke your knight status; I would have—it we really were in the medieval ages. Or renaissance, I'm not really sure what Penny really had in mind with this. What the hell is your problem?"

"My problem?" Sheldon repeated, standing from the chair and frowning at the two of them. "My problem is that instead of my original plans of simply being a happy father celebrating his progeny's birthday, I became a person everyone suddenly became interested in because I was seen with Penny. Do you know how many people asked me today on what my real relationship with Penny was? All of them excluding my friends. And it isn't just here—it happens everywhere and I'm very upset on how a handful of nosey men keeps on stalking me and waiting in front of the university just to get a story from me. Even my colleagues have forgotten my accomplishments in science in favor of me surprising them that I'm not 'asexual' and how I managed to 'date' a celebrity! Do you know how irritating that is? Especially how Penny and I aren't even together?"

Gregg furrowed his eyebrows, fully understanding what was upsetting his friend. "As a celebrity, we know how you feel with your privacy disappearing, we've actually gone through much worse than that. And as your friend—don't deny it—i think that I should tell you that Penny's sole reason of keeping your identity a secret was to protect your privacy so that you wouldn't go through what she goes through everyday. The only reason that she revealed the truth was because she didn't want you to think that she was hiding it because she was ashamed of you. Those security guards are all here because she wanted to make sure that the paparazzi wouldn't get to you, and cause she's guilty for all the trouble she caused you."

"Sparkly's right," Bailey agreed, nodding solemnly, "Penny's been simultaneously working nonstop to make this party perfect within two weeks  _and_  finding a way to get the media to stay away from you. She's aware of what you're going through and she wants to fix it, too. She isn't doing all of this to make you mad, you know. She just wants you to be part of the twins' lives like how you're supposed to."

Sheldon opened his mouth to speak but found himself speechless and simply licked his lips in thought. He didn't know that Penny was trying her best to help him, and he felt somewhat guilty for being so rude to her. He never even thought about how Penny had to deal with ten times the intrusion compared to what he was going through. It was slightly foolish how he was feeling resentment for his actions. There really was a lot that had changed between them in the last two years. Or months. He wasn't sure where he was supposed to start counting. "I apologize. I didn't think my words through, and I had no intentions of hurting Penny. It was foolish."

"You should apologize to Penny, not us," Gregg pointed out, standing up as he saw the guests crowding around the entrance. "And I think the best way of apologizing is to go do that silly royal entrance thing that Penny wants you to be a part of."

Bailey stood and gently pushed him forward before walking beside them towards the entrance. "He's still right. Penny cares, you know. She just had a hard time showing it."

"And now, ladies and gentlemen," the host announced from the stage, a simple rolled up cone enhancing the volume of his voice. "We welcome your highnesses; Prince Andrew, Princess Madison together accompanied by their mother, Queen Penelope!"

Trumpets and drums started playing as the security knights formed two lines in front of the entrance; creating a path with a bright red carpet in between. After approximately thirty seconds of the band playing, the knights started raising their swords one by one and Sheldon felt Gregg and Bailey pushing him towards the end of the carpet as Penny appeared from the entrance. The blonde was smiling regally as she slowly made her way down the carpet—she looked like an actual queen joining the people in festivities—while the guests cheered like townsfolk.

He met Penny's surprised gaze as he stood at the end of the walk, offering her a small smile once she reached him. "I apologize for my inappropriate outburst, earlier. It was rude, and I'm sorry."

Penny smiled up at him, standing beside him as the band started playing again as an indication that the twins were about to make their entrance. "It's alright, sweetie. I know that you've been stressing out lately with all the attention the media has been giving you. And I apologize for not even bothering to ask your opinion on anything about this party. I just wanted to make this the best birthday ever, and I'm sorry."

There was a long trumpet intro before the knights lifted their swords again and the twins appeared from the door. Andy was wearing a prince costume in various shades of blue while Maddie wore a red gown and matching golden crowns on top of their heads. They were both smiling as they walked down the carpet hand in hand—not fighting for once—and their grins widened as they noticed their parents side by side at the end of the walk; everyone cheering 'happy birthday' the entire time.

"Dat daddy?!" Andy exclaimed, his hand shooting up to his mouth.

Maddie toddled over to them, tilting her head back to stare up at her father. "Daddy weawwy hewe?!"

Sheldon bent down to pick Maddie up as Andy rushed towards them. "I wouldn't miss your birthday," he calmly replied, bending down to level with Andy. "Happy birthday."

Andy and Maddie both stared at each other before grinning at their father. "Happy batday, too, daddy!"

Penny watched happily as Sheldon got attacked by the twins hugs and she loved how it felt like they were the only ones there at the party. Even if she was still annoyed by Sheldon's reaction earlier.

* * *

"—and she said that I'm going to have one big blunder before finally getting happiness. What's your opinion about it?"

Bernadette raised an eyebrow, "Amy, I thought that you considered psychic readings to be fraudulent."

Amy vigorously shook her head, holding up a scroll with her readings recorded. "It's tarot reading actually, and it was amazing how she guessed about my life without even asking me questions like how the fake ones do it. It's awesome."

"Only Jesus can tell what will happen," Mary piped in, pouring gravy over her plate of chicken. "But, I'm sure that that fake is right about you having a good life. You're a nice girl, Amy. Odd, but nice, and Jesus loves nice children."

"Mother, stop smothering Amy with religion," Sheldon spoke up, Andy and Maddie sitting on his lap as they ate, "neither of us care for it, sadly."

Andy turned to face his grandmother, offering her a piece of the meat pie. "Gammy want some pie? It dewishas!"

Mary sighed before taking the piece from the toddler, "thank you, sweet pea. I hadn't tasted this one yet."

Maddie tore her attention from her giant piece of turkey to look up at her father. "Daddy, why no cake?"

"It no batday widout cake," Andy said, breaking off the crust of the pie and shoving it in his mouth. "Dis no cake, daddy."

Sheldon grabbed a napkin and started wiping at Andy's meat stained mouth. "You don't just look like your mother, you're starting to eat like her, too." He placed the napkin back on the table and glanced over his shoulder to look for Penny. "Why don't we ask your mother where your cake is?"

"Okay!" The twins agreed as Sheldon lifted both of them before heading off to where Penny was.

"He's getting used to being a father," Bernadette pointed out as the three of them watched Sheldon and the twins search for Penny. "Two months ago, he absolutely hated the idea of children. Look at him, now."

Amy nodded, settling back into his seat. "That's true. Back when the twins had just started living with them, he was always complaining about how they were bossy and annoying. Now, he does everything without even asking them what they want."

Mary smiled softly; it filled her heart to know that her son was finally growing up and embracing his responsibilities as a father. The thought of Sheldon having children was always vague to them even if they all wanted it to happen. Missy even said that if he ever had children they would be robots he built in a lab. But, the twins were far from robots and she loved that he proved everyone wrong. "Shelly might not say it much, but I know that he loves the twins. I can see it in his actions. I'm actually very proud of him." The three women silently agreed with each other as a commotion started near the entrance.

"Who's that?" Bernadette asked as Penny suddenly appeared—Sheldon and the twins at the other side of the party grounds—near the entrance where a man arrived. "He seems to be famous with the way that everyone is crowding around him."

Amy stood, squinting her eyes to look at the new guest. Curly auburn hair, charming face, and friends with Penny… "That's Collin Harris, the guy Penny is supposedly dating! He's actually handsomer in person."

Mary frowned as the Collin fellow—who was dressed up the  _king_ —hugged Penny while happily talking to her. He seemed a bit too close to her, and she did  _not_  like it. "I don't like him. He's too close to Penny. Datin' or not."

"Have any of you seen Penny? We've been looking everywhere for her," Sheldon said, the twins hoisted up on both sides of his hips. "She is literally nowhere to be found when we're looking for her."

"No cake, yet," Andy chirped, munching on piece of bread.

Maddie hummed, "batdays ahways has cake."

Bernadette rounded the table, placing her hand on Sheldon's arm and turning him to face the entrance. "She's over there."

Sheldon scowled as he saw the new guest—who had the nerve of dressing up as the  _king_ —interact with Penny, who was the queen. How charming. "Who's that?"

"That," a deep voice drawled, clapping a hand on his shoulder, "is supposedly the guy that my daughter's dating." Wyatt snorted beside the knight, "and he even has the nerve of dressing up as a king! I'm the only who can be king, here." The two tall men both glared at the intruder—in their opinion—who was already making his way towards them.

"Everyone," Penny called once she reached them, "this is Collin; he's also in Hindsight and was the one who helped me learn how to drift drive for the movie. This is my dad, Wyatt, that's Sheldon and his mother Mary, my friends Amy and Bernadette and the twins."

Collin—whom Sheldon noted was  _not_  as tall as he expected him to be—smiled at them, extending his hand out. "It's nice to meet all of you—Penny has told me a lot of stories about all of you."

Wyatt raised an eyebrow at his hand and simply crossed his arms. "Yeah, sure. Thanks for coming to the party."

"Dad," Penny chastised, frowning up at her father, "stop being rude."

"It's alright," Collin assured before moving to Sheldon and reaching his hand out to him. "I've heard all about your contributions in science, and I gotta say; you really have an amazing brain, dude."

Sheldon scrunched his face up in distaste at the gesture of hand shaking and nodded his head towards the twins that was on his hips and were both frowning like their father and grandfather. "As you can see, I am unable to shake your hand as my children are here. But even if they weren't, I wouldn't shake your hand." He saw Collin draw back and he continued, "if I may ask, why exactly did you think that you could dress up as a king when you're not from our kingdom?"

Penny sent him an annoyed look while Collin scratched his head, "uh, I just thought that I could dress up as a king. Can't I be a king from France or something?"

"No," Sheldon spat, peering down at the auburn haired man.

Collin furrowed his eyebrows in confusion then bent down to level his gaze with the twins who were still scowling at him. "Hi, I'm Uncle Collin. Your mom always talked about you when we were in France and I've been dying to meet you ever since. Happy birthday!"

Maddie turned her head in the opposite direction while Andy blinked at him, then looked up at their father. "Daddy, who he?"

"Your mother's friend," Sheldon replied, ignoring the glare that Penny was sending him. "Say hi."

Andy turned back to the still bent down man and scowled, again, "no thanks."

"Uh, Penny," Collin stood back up, glancing at Penny who looked apologetic. "Could you take me to where the Hindsight cast are? It's been a while since I last saw them."

"Sure, why don't you go ahead," Penny said, gesturing for Collin to go first. Once Collin was away from the table, Penny snapped her head towards Sheldon and Wyatt and hissed. "You are unbelievable!" She jabbed both men on their chests before marching after Collin.

There was a moment of silence before Amy spoke, "I didn't even get to say hi."

* * *

"You know, the first time I found out that my slugger was pregnant, I wanted to find you and kill you without even a second thought."

Sheldon looked up from the meat pie he was eating and found Wyatt standing in front of him with a goblet of ale. He quickly took a sip of—the not so time appropriate—iced tea and swallowed the food in his mouth. "Uh, would you like to sit down?"

Wyatt shook his head, taking another sip from his extremely watered down ale. "Nah, I'll just stand. Confrontations are better that way."

"This might sound rude, but, are you drunk?"

"I'm not drunk, this isn't even actual alcohol," Wyatt sniffed the contents of the goblet, "yup, this really isn't alcohol. Anyway, I just thought that since I have the chance, this is the perfect time to vent out the two years worth of frustration I have with you. Do you know how much Penny pain went through when she was pregnant? She was already so depressed and for about five months all she thought about was how she wasn't good enough to be a mother. You don't know how much it pained me and her mother to see her suffering. If you were a decent man, you would have at least found a way to find out that you have children."

Sheldon looked down at his boots, avoiding the menacing glare that Wyatt was sending him. "For nearly a year, I told myself that you were a bad person. You were the reason why Penny broke up with Leonard, and why her self esteem nearly vanished. I'm not saying that it's all your fault, it's just that you're a big reason why she felt that way."

"I apologize if I—"

"I'm not done talking!" Wyatt snapped, angrily stomping his foot on the grass. It was a good thing that Sheldon chose the table far away from the main party grounds, or else he would've caused a scene. Penny was already mad at the two of them, and he didn't want that to get any worse. "What I was saying was that it was wrong for me to blame you when you're not the only one at fault. I'm not here because I want to here you apologize and beg for forgiveness; I'm here because I'd like to give you a chance to fix my opinion of you. You don't really seem as bad as I thought you'd be."

Sheldon jumped when the 'former' king heavily placed his foot down on the empty spot beside him; finally realizing that he was slightly afraid of the older man. "What exactly do you mean by chance?"

"Well, what are your plans for my grandchildren? Are you going to stay in their lives or are you just going to let Penny handle everything?"

This day just couldn't get any worse. All he wanted was to be a part of the twins' birthday in peace, not to be interrogated be every single person in this party. His friends were the only ones who weren't trying to pry information from him, and he was thankful for that. "I have no plans of abandoning them and am more than willing to give anything they ask for. If it was possible to buy a planet, I'd buy them ten if they want. Penny does not need to get any papers for me to give child support, if that's what you're wondering about. We had already agreed on a suitable arrangement that works for the both of us. Would you like to see the agreement?"

"I don't mean that!" Wyatt groaned, obviously frustrated. "Look, the twins don't need money—Penny has enough money to support them for the rest of their lives. If it were about the money, I would've just told them to live with me. What my grandchildren need is a father who will be there for them; no matter what happens. I need to know if you can be that person."

The physicist turned knight heaved a sigh, he had gone through this before. "I already told Penny my answer to that, but since I fear that you'll hit me, I will answer that question again." He took a deep breath before glancing up at the older man in front of him. "I have promised both Penny and the twins that I will never miss another important event in their lives. To them, I've been absent for nearly two years and had I known the truth, I would have done something about it. I am not going to disappoint my progeny anytime soon."

Wyatt hummed, satisfied with the answer he gave him. "Okay, then what are your plans for my daughter?"

"Plans for your daughter?" Sheldon repeated in surprise, his eyes widening slightly. "Penny has no need for me in her life, but I am her friend. And Raj told me that friends are always there—that may also apply with Penny if she wishes."

"My slugger might seem tough," Wyatt started, turning to look at where Penny was. She and the twins were sitting on the giant throne that was on top of the stage, taking pictures with her friends. "But she feels lonely on the inside. Everything she does is for the twins, and with all of us living in Nebraska, she probably feels like the twins are all she has. You being in their lives would really help her, you know. I'm not an expert on my daughter, but I know what's good for her. And my instincts are telling me that that Collin guy isn't right for her." He removed his foot from the bench and sat down beside the knight. "I'd rather have you as my son-in-law than that little prick."

Sheldon gaped as Wyatt placed an arm around his shoulders, "your son-in-law?! Good lord, you sound like my mother to Penny!"

Wyatt grinned down at him, and it reminded him of Penny's smile that was always full of mischief. "Your mother and I have already agreed to it! So, you better not screw this up, son!"

He  _really_  had to talk to his mother about her baseless assumptions.

* * *

Mary hissed in frustration as Raj and Howard split half a roasted chicken. "I simply cannot allow this… intruder to just waltz into my baby boy and my dear Penny's life!"

"Mom, will you please stop this?" Sheldon cried, loosening the ribbon of his cape. "There is nothing between Penny and I—please remember that whenever you feel like dragging me into this fantasy of yours."

"Don't be rude, Sheldon," Leonard reprimanded, causing Sheldon to turn his gaze away. "Your mom is just concerned about you. I think?"

Amy glanced at the physicist who suddenly appeared, "when did you get here? You've been gone for nearly two hours."

Leonard shrugged, "I just had to finish something. What's important is that I'm finally here. That Collin guy looks different in person than on tv."

"He's even more annoyin' in person," Mary hissed, angrily biting off a chicken leg.

"I think he's okay," Bernadette remarked, munching on a bowl full of grapes. "He's nice, I guess. A bit too cocky, though, but nothing compared to Sheldon."

"Hey! I find it offensive to be compared to that ninny who parades himself as if he owns this place," snarled Sheldon, throwing a glare at Collin's direction. "How dare he even dress up as the king."

Gregg chuckled loudly, throwing a balled up napkin square on the scowling knight's forehead. "It's so cute how Shelly here is jealous. Bailey, tell him that he's jealous!"

Bailey rolled her eyes, concentrating on her slice of lemon cake. "Please, don't drag me into this. I have no intentions of getting Sir Genius, here, mad. I saw how good an aim he has over at the archery pen—he can kill us all with all that anger he has for poor Collin. The guy isn't even going to stand a chance." She smacked Sheldon lightly on the shoulder and sent him a small smile, "I'm with you on this one, as long as you don't kill me."

"Shelly's not gonna kill ya, Bailey, dear," Mary grinned, placing a hand on Sheldon's head and ruffling his hair. "He might build one of those lasers and shoot ya while yer not looking, but he ain't gonna kill ya with an arrow. It reminds him too much of his daddy and Kmart bourbon. He doesn't like associatin' something with more than one thing' don't ya, Shelly?"

Sheldon gently pried his mother's hand off of his head and grumbled. His mother and Wyatt was becoming the best of friends and were even sharing the same idiosyncrasies. Which was why he decided that they would never be allowed to meet, again. "No, I don't. Is it too hard for all of you to direct your attention to something other than me for more than thirty minutes? Everywhere I go in the park, people badger me with nonsensical questions and I'd appreciate it if none of you added to—"

"Hear ye, hear ye! Noble men and fair ladies, your majesty—the Queen Penelope—humbly requests your presence here at the town square!" The town crier (aka the host) called, dramatically waving his arms around as he called out to the guests. "May you all please make your way near the stage!" Everyone started crowding around the stage while Sheldon was forced out of his seat by Howard and Raj who nearly dragged him to the side of the stage.

"This is causing me to get claustrophobic," Sheldon grumbled, moving away from a guest that was standing to close to him. "There are more than enough people to trample me—must I really be here?"

Amy shook her head up at him, "Sheldon, the queen is calling for all of us to stand around the town square. Cooperate."

"She's not even a real queen—ow! Was the smacking really necessary, Leonard?"

Leonard gave him a patronizing stare that he recognized was his, "you're the one who kept complaining that everyone isn't blending into the theme yet you're the one who doesn't want to play along. We're in the middle ages, you're the supposed greatest knight in the land, I'm your idiot right hand man and Penny is the queen who somehow stumbled in your bedroom and gave birth to the royal heirs. Go with it, or else I'm going to ruin your gift to the twins."

Sheldon drew back his chin in surprise before narrowing his eyes at his roommate's threat. "You're blackmailing me! And you can't possibly do that, with all of the hard work I put into it and your effort to make it happen!"

"Try me," Leonard smugly said, a smirk forming on his face that Sheldon had the urge to lacerate. "Fine, but you're not getting away with this, Leonard."

Once literally everyone was near the stage, Penny and the twins stood in front of the throne while the town crier started jumping around along to the playing harpists. "Everyone's here! Wonderful! The queen has asked all of you here to be a part of the ceremonial blowing of the candle! May we request the presence of the king on stage?"

The guests started whispering to themselves as Wyatt sidled up to Sheldon. "They mean you, not me, bud."

"When did you get here?" Leonard inquired, staring at his ex-girlfriend's dad in surprise. "I didn't know that you'd be here, Wyatt."

Wyatt raised an eyebrow, "you're the one who suddenly appeared, I should be the one who should be shocked. Anyway, Sheldon, you should get up there before I kick you all the way there."

Sheldon furrowed his eyebrows, noticing how Penny was staring up at him from the stage. "Why must I even go up there? I'd faint with the number of people, here."

"Dude, you handled the second chancellor's award like a pro," Raj piped in, nudging him in his side, "you can do this."

The town crier scratched his head then mouthed something to Penny before lifting the out of place microphone up to his mouth. "Again, we're calling for the king?"

"I'm here!" They all turned to where Collin was, climbing up the short steps of the stage. He grinned as he reached the three blondes who were all staring at him with wide light eyes. "Sorry, it took a while. I was over at the restrooms."

Wyatt roughly pushed Sheldon forward, "there is no way in hell that he's the king."

"I told ya, Shelly, he's no good!" Mary hissed.

"Wait who is that guy?" Leonard asked.

"Wow, he really has some nerve presenting himself up there," Howard commented.

"They called and he was the only who responded, what do you expect?" Bernadette stated.

Sheldon watched silently as Collin crouched down and smiled at Maddie. "Is it okay if I carry you?"

Maddie stared at him for another second before stepping away from him. "You not daddy!" She huffed—clearly affronted by the gesture—then toddled over to the other side of the stage where Sheldon was standing. "Daddy, go up, too, pwease?"

Everyone turned to face Sheldon, waiting patiently for his response while Collin left the stage out of embarrassment from the toddler's rejection.

"Alright, but only because it is your birthday." He gave his daughter a smile before his friends nearly shoved him up the stage; Andy and Maddie immediately grabbing each of his hands and dragging him towards Penny.

"Mommy, daddy hewe!" Andy exclaimed as the older blonde lifted him up. "Dat guy not daddy."

Sheldon hoisted Maddie to his hip, her hand grabbing Andy's crown and placing in on top of the knight's head. "Daddy da king, wike Gampa! Cep' he dat badah, too!"

Penny chuckled softly, gesturing to the town crier with her free hand and taking a step closer to the crowned knight. "Did you really have to wait for Maddie to call you before you thought of going up?"

"I'm not a king, I'm a  _knight_ ," he corrected, removing his crown and returning it on Andy's head. "There's a difference."

"I don't think there's much of a difference, you know," Penny sent him a wink and turned to the side of the stage where the caterers were carrying two giant cakes. "There's your birthday cake, twins."

Andy gasped as a giant castle cake—complete with a fire breathing dragon flying on top with a tiny version of him sitting on top of it—was placed in front of him. "Da cake! It big!"

It took the caterers a minute before getting Maddie's cake—that made everyone gape in both confusion and wonder—on the stage.

It was a giant Death Star with a tiny Maddie standing triumphantly on top of it.

"Maddie has a det stah!" Maddie dramatically shrieked at the giant cake.

"Isn't the theme medieval-slash-renaissance?" Sheldon asked Penny, an eyebrow slightly raised. "Why is her cake the Death Star?"

"Cause she really loves Star Wars, just like her daddy." Penny happily replied, sending him a smile that he quickly returned.

"The royal family is now complete—now, it's time to blow the candles!" The town crier clapped his hands then a band version of 'happy birthday' started playing along with the guests singing.

"Told you they look great together," Gregg grinned, nudging Bailey.

Bailey snorted in response, watching as the twins blew out their candles. "Who said I didn't agree with you?"

"It's official, Mary," Wyatt cheered, turning to the Cooper matriarch, "we're going to get more grandchildren!"

Mary vigorously nodded, clapping as the four on stage took a picture together. "You got that right, brother! I can already smell weddin' bells from here!"

"Did you hear that? Penny's dad like him!" Bernadette pointed out, hitting her fiancé on the arm. "Pay up!"

Howard grumbled as he pulled his wallet out and handed money to the blonde then to Raj. "I hate making bets with you, you're too competitive."

"I'm just glad that I chose the right side," Raj hummed, counting his money.

"Wait, why wasn't I included?!" Leonard cried, glancing back at forth between the three.

Amy frowned slightly as she watched the happy family up on stage, a part of her hurting at the sight of them. As much as she loved her new bestie, there were just some things that she couldn't give up without a good fight.

* * *

"It's official," Penny announced, glancing up from her clipboard. "I'm going to donate about ninety percent of the gifts to charity. The twins  _do not_  need ten different cars, twenty leap frog thingies, eight doll houses, twelve bikes and a bunch of other thoughtful—yet seriously unnecessary—toys that would make a lot of children happy."

Leonard grinned, happy at how thoughtful his friend was. "That sounds great! I'm sure that the twins wouldn't mind sharing their toys with other kids. Right, twins?"

Both of the twins shrugged while Andy looked up at their father who was busy folding his costume. "What daddy's pwesent?"

Sheldon and Leonard both shared a look while Penny nodded, "that's right. You've mentioned that gift about twice during dinner and I still haven't seen it. Why is that?"

"Well, no one ever brought it up," Sheldon said with a smile, standing up and gesturing to the doors that lead to Penny's backyard. "It was Leonard's job to ensure that none of you notice it until it was ready. It is, now." He opened the french doors and stepped out, happy that the outdoor lights were turned on.

Penny helped the twins out the living room and found her mouth dropping at the sight of Sheldon's gift that occupied the corner of their backyard. "Oh my god… that's amazing!"

"A det stah!" Maddie gasped as she and her twin saw the Star Wars themed playground. The giant Death Star was the fort where there were various ship shaped slides and a sci fi themed jungle gym that connected to the second base where the Millennium Falcon was used as the roof that led to an array of swing sets. "Maddie in stah wahs!"

"Happy birthday," Sheldon greeted, patting both of the twins' heads before they scurried off to play on it. "Leonard made sure to install the rubber mulch so that the twins won't get hurt if they ever trip or fall. It's a hundred percent baby proof and is the only one on the planet like it."

The blonde blinked, turning to the playground then to the man who made it happen. "How were you able to get all of this done?"

"It took a while to get the manufacturers to make it, but once I offered to pay more and guided the construction of it, it was done within a month. Then, Leonard used the spare key you gave us and supervised—and tested—the set up while we were at the party." He sent her a proud smile and glanced at the twins playing happily at the playground. "Our progeny deserve only the best, don't they?"

Penny felt tears pricking her eyes at what Sheldon did and pulled him in for a hug. It was just a playground—it really wasn't much, actually—yet she could feel her heart swell up with unexplainable emotions at the simplicity of it all. She didn't know why, but it cleared all doubt she had of his capability of being a good dad.

"There's hope for you, after all."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to see this chapter expand a bit more, I recommend you read 'Live by the Sword' by Raquel Beth over in Fanfiction net, which is pretty much this chapter come to life. Awesome story, I promise.


	17. Internal Struggles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sheldon and the gang take a trip to Big Sur.

"—to fetch a pale of water, and on the way to the hill, they saw Little Red Riding Hood!"

Two children stopped in the middle of the stage, glancing around before the hooded girl appeared. "Jack and Jill! How nice of you to join me in visiting my grandmother!"

The chubby little boy nodded, "we're actually going to fetch water."

The little girl who played Jill turned to him and whispered loudly, "Billy! That's not the line!"

"Oh! Sorry!" Little Billy said as the audience filled with parents laughed lightly.

"Did Jack and Jill really go to Little Red Riding Hood's grandma's house?" Penny asked, glancing at the frowning man beside him. "I don't think I've read that one."

Sheldon quirked an eyebrow and wondered if she was being sarcastic. They were currently at the Sunshine Fun Center for the twins'—much anticipated—portrayal of the sheep and the duck in their age group's exaggerated rendition of Old McDonald. "As I am uncertain on what you meant by that; I don't know, either. It seems to me that they're aiming to put a twist into several of these classic stories by doing crossovers. I, for one, don't like it."

The blonde pursed her lips in thought, "hmm… I think it's a bit refreshing. I loved how they handled the Hansel and Gretel meets Jack and the Beanstalk! It was smart how they incorporated the idea of the two kids eating the beans to defeat the witch."

"Does that also apply with the Three Blind Mice meets the Three Little Pigs play that we had to suffer through, earlier?" He suggested, cringing at the memory of the unrealistic story. "I fail to see anything good about mice and pigs running around. Both are dirty."

Penny nudged him in the side, causing his frown to deepen. "Hey! I thought that it was a nice story about helping each other. It was so cute how the three blind mice chased the wolf away, I never thought that wolves were afraid of mice." She chuckled softly, avoiding the questioning stares that the other parents were sending her. "And you gotta admit; the one with Humpty Dumpty and Goldilocks and the Three Bears was genius!"

Leave it to Penny to be entertained by such silly and frivolous plays. He guessed that someone had to be the silly one between the two of them, and he'd rather it be her than him. "How are you even enjoying this? I wanted to leave when Goldilocks thought of  _eating_ him—are young children even supposed to know about cannibalism? And how exactly does  _friendship_ —which I strongly doubt, exists between that mooching thief Goldilocks and those three scary bears—help in putting a cracked egg back together."

"You're such a party pooper, you know," she said with a teasing grin before poking him in the rib—which, he mentally noted, he was going to award a strike for. "You've gotta cut loose a bit. These are just kids, and what matters is that they're having fun! Would you rather have the twins do something—" she brought her fingers up to make quotation marks in the air "—logical than something they enjoy?

It's not that he didn't want the twins to be completely stripped off of fun, he just wished that even one of these plays would make sense. They'd been at the daycare for about an hour—mainly because he insisted that they be there early in case there were changes in the play—and he had yet to see a play that he could say was even somewhat… educational. So far, the only play that made sense was the crossover (what wasn't?) between the Ugly Duckling and the Princess and the Frog where the swan encouraged the frog to be confident in what he was. Silly, but it had a point that he failed to see. "Can't they do both?"

"Of course! And I'm sure that this play is both fun and educational. Like Sesame Street!" She lifted Andy's Cookie Monster backup to his face and shook it. "Not only do the twins learn a cool new word—which really isn't as cool cause you teach them super smart crap all the time—but they have fun at the same time! They even taught me all about the word  _habitat_  from the episode they watched. See? Fun and educational."

He placed a hand on top of the backpack and pushed it down, "isn't that what I just said?" He took the bag from her hands and placed it on the plastic chair assigned to them, turning back to watch the play.

"—and right before Jack fell down, Little Red Riding Hood took his hand and saved him from falling. And the three lived happily ever after, the end!" The parents—not including him—started applauding as the cast members all took a bow and the next teacher went up on stage. "Our next performance is Old McDonald's Farm by the Sunshine class students!"

Sheldon turned back to Penny who was shuffling through her bag, "Penny, the video camera."

"It's here!" She took out the camera and turned it on, leveling it with her eyes just as the kids started lining up on stage. "Damn, it's taking forever to load!"

"I specifically told you  _not_  to turn it off or else it'll take a while to turn on, again. Why can't you just listen to me for once?"

"It's already on, okay? See?" She tapped the screen as the music started to play. "It's recording."

"—a dog, E-I-E-I-oh! With a woof, woof, here and a woof, woof there! Here a woof—"

"That's a bad angle—you won't be able to get the background if you don't fix it."

"It looks okay! And hey, if you want to do it your way, be my guest!"

"—a farm, E-I-E-I-oh! And on that farm he had a pig, E-I-E-I-oh! With an oink—"

"Must I remind you again on who told me to just leave my camera at home because she 'had this covered?"

"I already told you; I'll just send you a file! Why can't we just agree on this?"

"—Old McDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-oh! And on that farm he had a cow—"

"Because you're shooting at a wrong angl—oh! Never mind," he grabbed a hold of the back of her hands and lifted it upwards before letting go. "That's the right way to go."

"I'm sorry, it's not my fault that I'm not as tall as you!"

"If you'd just let me do this—and change the settings—we wouldn't be arguing right now."

"You can't just change the settings! It took forever for me to—"

"Miss Penny and Dr. Cooper," Smiling Brenda called, a worried (and not so creepy) smile on her face. "I'd hate to interrupt, but your children are up next." The two parents shared a look before the blonde handed the camera over and allowed him to do it his way.

"—Old McDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-oh! And on that farm he had—" Sheldon tightened his grip on the camera (Penny used her phone) as Maddie appeared in her duck costume that he made himself because he was not going to allow the twins to wear something mediocre "—a duck E-I-E-I-oh!"

Maddie bent her arms at her side, flapping them like a duck while hopping from one foot to another along with the song. "With a quack, quack, here and a quack, quack there! Here a quack, there a quack, everywhere a quack, quack! Old McDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-oh! And on that farm he had a sheep, E-I-E-I-oh!"

Andy crawled from behind the line of toddlers, his fluffy sheep (also homemade) costume bouncing each time he moved forward. "With a bah, bah, here and a bah, bah there! Here a bah, there a bah, everywhere a bah, bah! Old McDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-oh!"

"Did you see them?" Penny asked in amazement, shaking Sheldon's arm as the lion clothed kid went in front. "They were amazing!"

Sheldon nodded, a small smile forming on his face, "I must admit, they did perform excellently. Had they not been my progeny, it would be quite surprising to know that they are merely a week over two years old."

"Yeah, they really are great," the blonde agreed, motherly pride evident on her grinning face. "I'm glad this thing was postponed—thanks, Brenda!" She turned to the redhead—who had an amazed look on her smiling face—and vigorously shook her hand. "If it wasn't for you, I would have missed this!" She released the speechless redhead's hand and started clapping proudly as the class took their bows. "Come on, Sheldon! We gotta meet 'em backstage!"

"There is no backsta—" the physicist was abruptly cut off by Penny grabbing his hand and dragging him to the side of the stage where the toddlers were. "Must you really pull me?"

Penny glanced over her shoulder, "sorry 'bout that, but in the world of theatre; the family and friends—and fans—normally meet the cast at the backstage. Which is here!" She beamed up at him before waving to the twins. "Over here!"

"Mommy! Daddy!" The toddlers immediately broke away from their class and toddled over to where they stood.

"D'ya watch da pway?" Andy asked as Sheldon lifted him up, removing the sheep headpiece off his head. "Andy da sheep!"

Penny took the duck beak off of Maddie's face and stuffed it into her bag, "yes, we watched both of you—you were great!"

"Dat cos' Maddie da duck," Maddie stated knowingly, causing Andy to grumble. "Da duck da bestest!"

"No, da sheep da bestest, too!" Andy mumbled, frowning at his twin. "Wight, daddy?"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow at him; he cared not for sheep nor ducks. Both were equally as annoyingly noisy. "I… I believe your mother can answer that. Penny, what do you think?"

"I think both are great and that they shouldn't be compared with each other." She sent each of the twins a small grin before nodding towards the exit. "Now, why don't we get some ice cream?"

* * *

One new thing—out of many—Penny noticed about the twins was that they seemed to have inherited (or got infected by) Sheldon's love for talking incessantly about one thing for hours. On and on and on until he was finally satisfied with what he said or else he'd blow up. Metaphorically, of course.

"—da duck is bettah—"

"—da sheep can do wots moh—"

"—da duck oh-wandge, not wike da—"

"—sheep can jump ovah a—"

That was all they talked about since the play ended; which between the duck and the sheep was better. She was totally happy that her two year old children could already speak better than kids thrice their age—she just wished that they could talk about something other than what they were talking about thirty minutes, ago. Like what Dora did, and what Elmo taught them… or shoes.

"No, no, no, no! Da sheep da best!" Maddie hissed, slamming her tiny fist on the tray of the high chair. It was a good thing that there wasn't a lot of people around, or else the toddler would definitely have caused a scene. "Asept it!"

Andy crossed his arms and glared at his sister, "nevah!"

Most people would find it odd—she'd say crazy, but these were  _her_  children and Sheldon would take offense to that—to see toddlers fighting on and on (and on) over something as silly, but she had to admit it that the level on how advanced they were arguing kinda made her proud.  _Kinda_. Now, she was a thousand percent sure that the twins were Sheldon's and no one else's. How reassuring.

"I apologize for taking a while but they ran out of chocolate—which is baffling how they failed to restock given the knowledge that it runs out quickly—and I have no desire to order a different flavor, which caused me to wait for them to finish restocking." Sheldon griped, placing their ice cream in from of them before taking a seat across from her. "As much as I enjoy their food and service, it seems I must  _still_  file a complaint to ensure that this little debacle never happens, again. How utterly disappointing."

"Ookies and cweam!" Maddie chirped as she dabbed her finger into the ice cream and brought it to her mouth. "Dewishas!"

"You have a spoon," he ordered, pointing to the bright yellow plastic spoon that was stuck in the ice cream. "Please, use it."

Andy grabbed his spoon and scooped up a spoonful of ice cream, "da spoon!"

Penny shrugged, ignoring the three, and taking a bite of her ice cream, "wow, this is good! I can't believe I've never been here before!" She sucked on the spoon, sighing happily before meeting Sheldon's scrutinizing gaze. "How come you guys never brought me here?"

"Scryer's opened for business three months after you left," he said in a bored, uninterested tone as he crushed a cone and sprinkled it on top of the twins' ice creams. "We also would not be able to take you here—had you not left—as we only found this place when Leonard went on a drunken run, and somehow ended up here. It's a bit secluded, if you haven't noticed."

There was a certain hint of… resentment in his tone and Penny briefly wondered if he was still mad at her for suddenly leaving. He  _did_  have a knack for holding grudges, and she was on the top of that list at one point. That made her a bit sad cause (come on!) they were already doing so well in the path of friendship, and, and—and she decided to ignore it because she was probably just giving it a hidden meaning that it didn't have that Sheldon didn't mean and that she was just imagining. Great, now she was rambling about the internal struggles of Penny that didn't make sense. "Uh, yeah, it is a bit hidden but that's a good thing."

"How so?" He took a napkin and wiped at the corners of Maddie's—who practically ignored the use of the spoon—mouth that was smeared with ice cream.

"Well, for starters, it would have been a hassle if there were a lot of people, here." She started, taking another bite of her strawberry ice cream. "They would be taking photos, and harassing us for answers and that would've sucked. We'd never be able to eat here, again—but since this place isn't easy to find, we can go here all the time!"

"Dat nice!" Andy said, smiling at her, "mommy and daddy and Maddie and Andy no go out, yet!"

"No," Maddie hissed, "we go-ded to da awahd and to Tesas and to da batday wid mommy and daddy, 'membah?"

Andy blinked, titling his head to the side before shrugging. "Oh yeah… Andy wikes bein' wid mommy and daddy! We gots to be togedah ahways!"

"Maddie tinks dat daddy and mommy and Maddie gots to just wive togedah in da big, big, big house and wive happy evah aftah!"

Sheldon started coughing wildly while Penny felt  _something_  die inside of her at what the toddler said. It really was hard to believe that they just turned two the other day. She thought that the topic of them living together was over and done with when Sheldon told them that they would be together even if they didn't live in the same house. How the hell was she even supposed to explain to them that the reason why their father didn't live with them was because they were never in a relationship and that there was a small—big, no, HUGE—chance that he was in something close to a relationship with someone else?

Penny chuckled awkwardly as the twins flashed her their happy, ice cream coated grins that caused her to take a sip of water to calm herself. She kind of felt silly with how a simple statement—from her two year old daughter, too!—made her uncomfortably nervous. Why exactly, she had no idea. "That sounds… nice, right, Sheldon?" She sent him a 'go with it' look and an uneasy smile.

The physicist gave her a tight lipped smile before the Star Wars theme started playing from his phone. "Hello, Leonard, why are you calling me? Yes, the play is over. Yes, the twins were magnificent. Yes, we caught it on camera—will you just cut the banalities and answer the first question?" Sheldon hissed; his face scrunching up in distaste as he listened to his roommate over the phone. "Of course, I didn't forget about it; I already finished preparing for it last night so that I wouldn't have to do it, tonight. No, I am not lying—why would I even lie? I'm at Scryer's with Penny and the twins. Yes, must I explain everything to you?"

"Daddy mad?" Andy asked her, a small frown appearing on his face.

"Your daddy's not mad," she reassured, patting the top of his head, "that's just the way he talks. He's a bit condescending, but he's a nice guy. Finish your ice cream, sweetie."

"—be back in about an hour or so, then we may talk about everything else. Yes, alright. Goodbye," he removed the phone from his ear and grumbled, putting it back into his pocket.

"So, what was that all about?" Penny inquired, watching as Sheldon stabbed his ice cream with his spoon. "You seemed pretty upset."

He clucked his tongue in annoyance—probably from what he discussed with Leonard—and scowled. "It's this symposium that Raj and Amy forced me to take part in. I, honestly, had no intentions of going, but they somehow tricked me into speaking at the Institute of Interdisciplinary Studies symposium on the impact of current scientific research on societal interactions." He made a strangled noise before huffing, "I have no problems with the crowd—there's six of us—it's the thought of staying at a four star resort, that is probably infested with all kinds of diseases, over the weekend that troubles me."

"Wait, so you're mad cause you're going to spend the weekend at a fancy hotel?"

"Yes, and I can already imagine how dreadful it will—"

"Can we come along?" Penny blurted out, sounding a little too excited than expected. "I have the weekend off, and I can just get a room for the three of us. What do you think, twins?" Andy and Maddie shared a look of confusion before they both shrugged.

He furrowed his eyebrows at the blonde who was beaming up at him with the little twinkle in her eyes that she had whenever she was overly excited about something. Like whenever she was shopping for shoes. He didn't know why she was so eager to join in, but he saw nothing wrong with them tagging along. It would be nice to expose the twins to the various fields of science while they were young so they would know what  _not_  to work for. "Hmm… I suppose it would be okay for the three of you to go. I don't think that any of the others would object to it."

"Great!" Penny clapped her hands together like how a small child would before turning to the twins who were still confused. "Did you hear that, twins? We're going on a vacation together! We should all go shopping for brand new outfits!"

"A vakshun! Andy wants vakshun!" The toddler cheered, happily sipping the melted ice cream from the cup. "Andy tink da vakshun gonna be fun!"

"Vuh-kay-shun," Maddie pronounced slowly, her head bobbing with each syllable. "Vakeshun. It sound fun!"

Sheldon smiled unknowingly as the three blondes all started babbling about how 'fun' the vacation was going to be and he guessed that there would be no harm in bringing them along. He had to admit, their cheerfulness was a bit infectious, and the trip seemed like it  _could_  be fun. Operative word; could.

* * *

Penny had always loved going on vacations, whether it be to the beach or just staying at him, she enjoyed them. She also found vacations with friends to be fun, and had her fair share of group vacations to be able to rank all of her vacation experiences in order of uniqueness, memorableness and fun. And as of 2011, this was the first time she had  _ever_  gone on a vacation as a celebrity. She hadn't even bothered to think about the many problems that would arise with her attending a bunch of science-y lectures with a bunch of geniuses.

Due to Sheldon being the self-appointed travel supervisor, he was the one who made the itinerary which mainly consisted of going to various lectures during the entire two days. He was also the one who decided on who would ride with who, and since Howard borrowed his neighbor's—possibly germ ridden—van so that all of them could ride together; Sheldon made up  _his_  mind that she would bring her car and drive all the way to San Francisco with him and the twins. She agreed after he promised that he wouldn't be obnoxious, which was impossible, cause they left at  _six_  in the morning and she regretted even thinking of tagging along.

Then, after the  _loooooooong_  drive filled with the twins dodging a bullet by sleeping and Sheldon yapping on and on (and on and on and on and on) about various games and other crap she didn't care about, they arrived at the hotel where—unbeknownst to her genius friends—their symposium thingy started, and instead of taking a nap, she withstood an hour and a half of her friends talking like how they did all the time. Except with other scientists joining in and asking questions that was probably about crap she didn't get. Then immediately after that, Sheldon immediately told her that she was going to spend the rest of the day attending  _every single_  lecture with them. The twins were asleep the entire time. So, they did and she actually learned a thing or two from those strangers.

The problem was; what she learned was that she should have put on a disguise before joining in. Everywhere she went, people made a commotion over her, and even went so far as interrupt one of the speakers just to ask for her to take a picture with her. It was complete utter  _chaos_  with the crowds; the speakers getting pissed at her and the others constantly apologizing to the speakers while Sheldon literally barked at everyone to stop ruining the lecture. The hotel staff even sent security to some of the lectures they went—she kinda didn't have a choice in saying no because she promised Sheldon that she'd stick to his schedule—just to control the crowd.

To sum it up, a lot of scientists—including Sheldon—got pretty pissed at her.

On the bright side, her room got upgraded to an executive suite just because she was a celebrity! That was pretty much the only perk of being a celebrity that didn't make a bunch of geniuses hate her. And she didn't cause too much problems with the guys' and Bernadette and Amy's lecture, so that was great, too.

"Hey," she softly said as Sheldon arrived at the table, a scowl becoming a permanent fixture on his face. "Are you mad at me?"

Sheldon placed his plate on the table and took a seat in front of her. "No, I am not. I am merely annoyed that some of those phony scientists had the nerve of telling me to stop bringing you to their lectures and hogging the attention from them." He stabbed his fork down on a piece of bratwurst that Penny oddly felt sorry for. "I can bring anyone I want to to their idiotic lecture. They should be honored that I even thought of attending. Hmph! The nerve of them."

Penny bit her lip, sensing the hateful aura that was emanating from the physicist. "I'm sorry… I didn't mean to attract all of those unnecessary attention. I—I just wanted to follow your itinerary like I promised."

"Why are you apologizing?" He asked in a surprised tone, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion that she didn't expect would be his response. "You didn't do anything wrong."

"Well, I'm the reason why those phony scientists got mad at you…" she stared at his confused face and mirrored his expression. "You're not mad?"

His face softened and he returned to his dinner, "why would I be mad? The math told me beforehand that there was a big possibility of this happening. I am not surprised that people would go to extreme measures—such as crashing lectures—to see you. I already expected it to happen," he admitted and there wasn't even a single twitch on his face. Well, what do you know; she was worried about nothing. "I'm upset because of those petulant wannabes who think they've contributed something useful to science when all they've really done is copy someone's work and dumb it down. Not everything that upsets me is caused by you, Penny."

That was either (a) an insult referring that she was conceited or (b) an odd compliment saying that she wasn't the cause of all the misery in his life. How confusing—and strangely touching at the same time—but since it's Sheldon, he probably didn't mean anything by it. Everything that comes out of his mouth usually confuses her. "Gee, thanks."

"You're welcome," he replied with a smile as the others returned from the buffet table. "Like I said; not everything is your fault."

"Daddy, wook!" Andy called as Leonard settled him into the highchair. He held up his fork that had a piece of octopus shaped sausage on it. "Mistah Oktapas!"

"There's a kiddie section at the buffet that has the most adorable food ever!" Raj chimed in eagerly, placing Maddie in the highchair beside Andy. "There's all sorts of animal shaped food! Like this bear claw!"

Leonard stared at Raj and sighed, "don't mind him, he found some confidence over there by the bar."

Amy took the seat beside Sheldon and turned to him, "your argument with Dr. Richards was impressive, you literally made him speechless."

"I did, didn't I?" Sheldon smugly smirked, "that's what he gets for insinuating that I'm the cause of why everyone chose to fawn over Penny instead of him. It's his own fault for being a subpar physicist. Oh, and I forgot to commend you on your insight in our panel, earlier."

The neuroscientist smiled, "thank you. I know you have limited respect for biology and it—"

Penny took a bite of her steak and quietly observed as Sheldon and Amy started discussing the symposium thingy earlier. She had never noticed it before; Sheldon and Amy's closeness. Up until she saw them together in person, and during the informative panel, she had little to no interest in their relationship. She knew it as a fact, but never really took a step back to look at the big picture. There was this… connection between them that she never paid any attention to, and it oddly reminded her of them before she left. Something about the two scientists just clicked—whether it be platonic or romantic—and she couldn't help but be  _slightly_  envious of their relationship.

Not that she was jealous! She was not! She just wished that she could have that type of friendship the two had, one where they seemed to trust each other completely. Not that she didn't trust Sheldon! She was very fond of the physicist, don't get her wrong, but she wasn't sure if Sheldon still disliked her or not. He may seem as if he no longer hated her, but Sheldon was a very complex man that had about a hundred different doors with various odd locks that hid his real feelings. He might not be lying that he wasn't mad at her, but she just felt as if there was something… off about him whenever it had something to do with her. Like he still hadn't completely forgiven her…

Great, she was rambling off again on the internal struggles of Penny! She  _had_  to stop doing that—

"—would be fun if we try it out, what do you think, Penny?"

"Huh?" Penny snapped out of her troubled thoughts and looked up to see Bernadette giving her a questioning look. She saw Sheldon haughtily shake his head and she regretted even wanting to be closer to him. The jerk. "What were you saying?"

Howard glanced at his fiancée then back at her, "Bernie was wondering if it would be okay for you guys to have an impromptu bachelorette party in your room, tonight. Me and the guys are going to have a mini bachelor party over at the bar, later, so we thought it would be appropriate to do the same with you girls."

"Oh, yeah sure. There's like two rooms—we can each have a party." She shrugged, shifting her gaze to Sheldon who was scowling as if someone had touched his food. "Are you going to go with them?"

Sheldon clucked his tongue, "no. I do not wish to weasel myself through a bunch highly inebriated dimwits that's only goal in life is to engage in coitus."

"Hey!" Raj cried, placing his martini on the table. "It's not just for that! I'm hoping for a chance at love, too!"

"Exactly my point," Sheldon said in distaste causing Raj to sigh. "While the troglodytes party, Einstein studies. I shall stay inside the comfort of my room and enjoy a night of peace and quiet—the true definition of relaxation."

Penny stared at him for a moment before getting an idea, "if you aren't gonna go out, will it be okay for the twins to stay in your room? I don't want to expose them to Bernadette drunk." The microbiologist silently nodded in agreement and Penny continued, "you won't mind, right?"

"Of course not. I'd rather have the twins near me than them getting traumatized by whatever Bernadette might do—no offense." He reached over to Andy and cut a baked potato in half. "I have no objections with them staying over. As long as none of you bother me while intoxicated, I'm fine."

"I guess it's settled, then," Leonard happily said, "we're gonna have some fun tonight!"

* * *

"What he do, daddy?"

"Andy, quiet!"

"But Andy con-fuss!"

"Watch da tv!"

"But Andy no get it, yet."

Sheldon rubbed his temples as the twins continued arguing, ignoring the pay-per view movie that he strongly regretted allowing the twins to choose. He should have just left them to watch Disney channel instead of wasting his money on such a horrible movie about zoo animals joining a circus. "He's trying to get him to do the act he did back in New York, if I'm not mistaken."

"Oh," Andy said, leaning his head back to look up at him. "What a act?"

"It means performance," he informed the toddler who stared blankly at him. "Just watch the movie."

Maddie turned and lightly smacked her twin's arm, "watch da tv, Andy! Awex da wion saying sumtin!"

Andy sighed, picking up his Woody doll and crawling back to the foot of the bed where his twin was. "Okay."

"Just like their mother…" he muttered to himself before he heard someone knock on his door. It was probably Leonard, back from an unsuccessful attempt of trying to find a girl who would offer him love. He stood from the bed and made his way to the door and unlocked it, "I see you've returned from your futile—"

"Hi." Penny greeted, waving at him like they hadn't seen each other hours before. "I just thought that I'd check on the three of you."

Sheldon frowned, leaning forward and sniffing her. "Are you, perhaps, drunk? I don't smell alcohol on you, but that doesn't necessarily mean that you haven't drank any."

The blonde shook her head, stuffing her hands in the hotel provided robe—which, he would not advice that she wear while roaming the halls. Even if this was a four star hotel, there were still some shady people present; not to mention drunken cretins who might think that they would be able to win over her man hands. "No, I haven't drank, yet. The only alcohol in my fridge was beer and Bernadette and Amy don't drink beer, so they ordered some wine. I wanted to drop by while the wine was still being brought up."

He took a step back, opened the door and gestured for her to come in. "Please, come inside before some… sex offender locates you and chooses you as their next target." She offered him a small smile before he closed the door and trailed behind her. "I am assuming that your 'girl's night' isn't going as well as planned?"

Penny raised an eyebrow as she took a seat at the edge of the adjoining bed; the twins still completely absorbed in their movie. "Well, no, not really. Nothing has actually happened, yet, and checking up on the three of you seemed like a good idea."

"As much as I don't want to address this—as I believe that this will simply result into pointless chatter over something trivial; Penny, is something bothering you?" He asked out of curiosity, standing at the other side of the room. He absolutely  _loathed_  banal chit chat—especially about someone else's feelings—but he had a hunch that this feeling of peculiar unease that Penny brought into the room would stay if he didn't do something about it. This was more of Raj's forte, however, he'd take a shot at it for the sake of getting rid of the uncertainty that came with his sudden visitor.

Penny glanced over her shoulder, her green eyes widening in surprise. "What?"

He mentally groaned; this was harder to do than expected. "I asked if something's bothering you."

"I—I don't know," she shrugged, sounding like she actually didn't know why she went to his room. He would guess that their 'girl's night' did not go as well as planned, but seeing as it hadn't even started yet, he decided not to ponder about it. Besides, Penny was like a flag—firmly attached to a rigid pole—she went wherever the wind took her. One day she'd feel like going to the park and she'd just go. Without any respect to anyone she forces to tag along's schedule. With that in mind, he remembered that he still had to check which of their progeny possibly inherited that trait.

"Like I said, I just felt like checking up on you guys." Not surprising, the wind seemed to have directed her here. "Well—actually, I kinda got used to calling the three of you at around this time and it felt kind of… wrong not to check on you. Even when I got back, I picked the twins up from your place at around this time and when I was waiting as Bernadette ordered the wine, I got a bit anxious on how you were. Which is a bit silly, I guess," she was still facing the twins and he had yet to move from his spot from behind the vacant bed. He felt that if he moved, something unnecessary would happen. "Cause I just saw you guys an hour, ago, but, I don't know. I can't seem to relax without knowing that you guys are okay."

Sheldon was about to respond when she whipped her head around to face him, immediately stopping him. "It's turned into an odd habit of mine—seeing what the twins are up to—and I think I'm going through some kind of withdrawal." He stared at her for a moment before she turned back to watch the twins. "I'm just hoping that it'll eventually go away."

A habit that she was withdrawing from? Were they some sort of prohibited drug that he didn't know of? He understood what she meant—she was sticking to homeostasis. Her calling up on them had become a routine for her for two entire months and then that changed into her picking them up at their apartment practically everyday. Recently, she also spent her weekends at their place to join them for dinner. What he just couldn't comprehend about what she said was why she kept on including him into her little conundrum. He failed to see what made her associate him with the premise of it.

She was always confusing to him.

"I'm not an expert in dealing with these types of situations—but, if I may weigh in." He blurted out; stunned that his mouth—curse it for betraying him!—spoke on its own. Well, there was no use of not continuing, now that he had the blonde's attention. Curses. "You're no longer in a far off country across the Atlantic; you're here, now, and that must cheer you up a bit. You no longer need the help of a voice over IP to see what the twins are up to and can interact with them in ways that were impossible through a screen. That must be gratifying for you, is it not?"

Penny looked up and sent him a genuine smile that reminded him of the first time they ever met. It wasn't just nostalgic, it was… unexplainable. That was the right word to define it; because he couldn't find an appropriate word for it. "You know what? You're right, Sheldon. I don't know why I'm overthinking this, but, I'm here, now and that's what counts." Her smile cut through him for another second before her phone pinged in her pocket. "Bernadette just texted me that the wine's in the room and that Amy's threatening to drink it all if I don't get back."

She stood from the bed, planting a kiss on each of the twins' head—which both did not notice—and moved towards the door that he opened for her. "Thanks for letting me stay here, I knew that talking to you would make me feel better."

"Yes, well, your presence is no longer as bothersome as I thought it was and I see no problem in engaging in banalities every now and then." She smirked teasingly at him and they shared a laugh. "The latter is sarcasm, of course, but we can both see that you noticed that. Here," Sheldon grabbed the spare key off the table and handed it to her, "Leonard has a key, and since I have no plans of leaving the room, you should take this to avoid ruining my REM sleep as I can tell that your 'girl's night' will end quite late. Or early—depending on how you perceive it. Please refrain from waking me up when you fetch the twins."

"I know, I know," she chuckled as she placed the key in her pocket and grinned up at him, "I'm not just gonna walk in and ruin your beauty sleep, sweetie. I don't want you bolting up from your bed screaming, danger! Danger! Like how you used to. I'm good with slipping in, watching you sleep like Dracula, then slipping out with the twins. You won't even notice that I was here."

"Yes, well… don't drink too much," he advised, holding the door open with his shoulder. "You in an inebriated state can lead to an indefinite number of cataclysmic scenarios that will be quite inimical for everyone— _specifically_  the three of us that will be left in this room."

His eyes widened as she extended her hand out and gently patted his shoulder. "I just love it when you start talking dirty! But, don't worry, I promise to only take a sip or two, okay?" She gave him one last smile before stepping back towards the hallway. "Well, I'll see you when you're asleep. Night, sweetie!" She did a little wave before trotting down the hall and disappearing around the corner.

Talking… dirty? How she managed to confuse pure, genuine concern for what she called was talking 'dirty' was beyond him. Whatever that may mean. His father was right; women—particularly a blonde actress that went by the name of Penny—were just downright baffling. It would take more than just defeating an expert level boss to be able to understand that blonde enigma, and as much as he loved challenges, it appeared that the notion of trying to perceive Penny's mind was going to be be harder than he thought. The math also suggested that Penny and her confusing ways were going to be the death of him.

He strongly hoped that Maddie wouldn't be as confusing as her mother when she grew up—one blonde enigma was enough for one lifetime. Or twenty.

* * *

"—and I wondered; what if I  _make_  Ricky listen to the fun sounds of the eighties?" Amy explained, one hand holding a glass of wine—probably her tenth—and the other moving animatedly in the air. "So, I played a track and he went nuts!"

"The good kind of nuts or the bad kind?"

"I'm not even sure! I never thought of asking Ricky how he feels, to be honest. I just assume that he likes me as much as I perceive to him to be a nuisance that enjoys throwing feces at me." Amy laughed to herself, the wine spilling from the glass and on to the carpet. "That stupid little monkey! Thinks he's better than me!"

"You're n—not gonna forget about that, huh?"

"Not until I get my—hic—dignity back, no." The brunette poured herself another glass of wined and turned to the blonde who had barely had a drink. "Hey… bestie, I noticed that you're not drinking, why is that?"

Bernadette stared at Penny before adding in, "yeah, you used to drink everyone under the table! Literally! What happened?"

Penny, who was the only one who was sober between the three of them, slowly took the (fifth) bottle of wine from her intoxicated friends—who, were surprisingly talking really well despite being completely hammered—and replaced it with a large bottle of carbonated water. "Well, ever since I found out that I was pregnant with the twins I promised myself that I'd stop drinking since it was what got me into a lot of trouble time and time, again. Now, I'm just a social drinker and I'm pretty proud of it."

"Wow," Bernadette grinned, downing back the last drops of wine and (unknowingly) filled her glass with carbonated water. "I'm re—really happy for you, Penny! That's really impuh… impressive! Good job, Pen-nay!"

Amy clapped a hand behind Penny's back, roughly patting with pride. "She's not just drop dead gor… gees… pretty! She's perfect, too! I feel so lucky to be your bestie, bestie!" Penny gently removed Amy's hand from her back and grabbed her phone, noticing that she had a new text. "Who's that, bestie?"

"Oh, it's just Sheldon," answered Penny, putting her phone back into her pocket. "He just texted me that the twins finally went to sleep. It's a little past their bedtime, and with all those naps they took, I thought that they wouldn't go to sleep. It seems Sheldon got them to sleep."

Bernadette vigorously nodded, raising her hand up to speak. "Who—who'da thunk that our Penny would have kids? It's so amazing how life works!" She took a big sip of the wine (carbonated water) and burped. Loudly. "And Sheldon! That tall, pale, genius man-child—who'da think that he'd be a good dad? He's like a superhero daddy except without the powers or the abs but his powers can be being a good dad! But, I doubt that he can get muscles, or maybe he can. I don't know. Science rocks."

"Indeed, although I always knew that Sheldon would be a good father—that's why I'm looking forward to producing a line of intellectually superior benign overlords that will guide humanity into a better tomorrow with him!" Amy happily slurred, hiccuping the entire time. "I d—don't care what that poopy head Lee—leh—nard says, I'm going to get me some Sheldon Cooper!"

If Penny had so much as drank more than two glasses of wine tonight, she would have just laughed at the not so unfamiliar—and oddly twisted—pang of  _jealousy_  that shot through her body at the mention of the infamous benign overlords. Cause it would be ridiculous for her to be jealous over it! Only a silly drunk would get jealous over something like that about someone who's just her friend that only someone definitely not in their (disappointingly sober) right mind would do.

The problem was, she was still on her second glass of wine, and she hadn't even took a sip of it, yet. Which… probably meant that she was someone who was definitely not in her right mind that was ridiculously getting jealous over something so ridiculous as her friend talking about her excitement over  _hypothetically_  having progenies (Sheldonese) with another friend of hers which also happened to be the twins' fath—

She seriously  _had_  to stop rambling about the internal struggles of Penny.

"—I mean I like him, like him, but he's still a flight risk," Amy garbled on; tilting her glass upside down, trying to make the last drops of wine fall on her tongue. "But, but, I think it's gu—gonna work cause I like him!"

She  _was_  under the influence of alcohol, so that might kinda explain why she wasn't being a good friend by attempting to drown Amy out. About 5% drunk; that's enough to get pulled over. Since she really wasn't drunk, she gave her advice instead. "If you really like him then you can't just give up, Ames. I can see that Sheldon is happy with you, and that's definitely something to hold on to."

Amy gave her a goofy—drunken—grin before throwing an arm to hug her. "Oh, bestie, not only are you jaw duh-roppingly gorgeous but your heart shines as bright as your golden hair. I love you so much, bestie!"

Bernadette nodded drunkenly in agreement. "True. So, Pen-nay, how's-uh—your rela… resh… relationship with the Collin fellow?"

"Well, I'm not really dating Collin—we just ate together during filming in Paris. And he helped me learn how to drift faster, but we're just friends. Contrary to what those rumor shows say," Penny admitted, placing her untouched glass of wine on the coffee table that Bernadette quickly transferred to her glass. "And wow, my last relationship was with Leonard. I didn't even realize that until, now."

Amy gasped dramatically at the mention of the experimental physicist and stared wide eyed at the sober blonde. "Are you puh—lanning on getting back together with him? It would be so cool if we dated best friends, too, bestie! Like a fictional pair of besties! If not, you can hang out with the Collin man. Even if he's not great. S'long as your happy, my bestie!"

"True that." Bernadette agreed, lifting her almost finished glass. She was really enjoying her impromptu bachelorette party.

"Actually, I don't really want a relationship, right now. It doesn't seem so appealing since I'm perfectly happy with just me and the twins." It was true; having a relationship was no longer a huge priority as it used to be since she had the twins. Now, all that mattered to her was that she be able to give them a comfortable, happy life and for her to maintain her successful career. Relationships were just distractions, and they'd have to go through the twins before they get to her. "Motherhood's really changed me, you know. And I'm glad for it."

"Excellent speech! Why don't we make a toast to the best coin in the world?" Bernadette suggested before raising her glass. "A toast to Penny, the guh—reatest coin advice in—spuh—rational speech giver and happy with no man in her life!" Penny laughed as she and Amy both raised their glasses and clinked them together. "And to the best impo… impra… that! Bu—bachelorette party ever!"

"Cheers!"

* * *

It was official; what was supposed to be a toned down and relaxed bachelorette party had turned into one of the craziest nights ever.

Once Bernadette found the other bottle of wine she drunkenly decided that bachelorette parties need male strippers, and so Amy called the front desk, slurring the entire time about monkeys. Then, the hotel staff thought it was  _her_ , drunk, trying to order food, and they brought up a cart full of food on the house. She gave the man a good tip for being nice, and as an apology for Amy coming up to him and screaming, "Sheldon! Must you be so blind!" before vomiting all over him while Bernadette drunk dialed her whole phonebook.

After two mugs of black coffee and a hot bath each—which Penny had to crawl just so that Amy wouldn't drag her with them—the two friends passed out on the sectional in the living room. And she decided to get the twins since Leonard would probably come back from the bar, wanting to sleep. Based on her past experiences in going to hotel bars, it was the appropriate time to retreat back to the room when nothing happens. The same goes for three little geniuses that didn't have Sheldon to hold them back.

Penny unlocked the door and  _quietly_  entered the dimly lit room; she promised Sheldon that she wasn't going to wake him up. She padded inside, seeing the first bed empty and immediately worrying on where the twins were. She knew for a fact that the twins would be sleeping on that bed since their blankets  _and_  Andy's Woody doll were on top! She immediately moved to the second bed and found her jaw dropping all the way down to the lobby at the most precious sight she had ever seen in a long time.

There, in the middle of the bed was Sheldon, sound asleep and also unintentionally recreating an image of Dracula sleeping in a coffin in her mind. Snuggled to his left was Maddie, who was clutching her Winnie the Pooh doll with her right arm, and Sheldon's arm in her left. Then, to his right was Andy; who had the side of his face resting on Sheldon's chest, an arm and a leg draped over him as he drooled on the fabric of his father's plaid shirt. And slowly, a smile crept upon Penny's lips.

She would be lying if she said that she didn't take about ten pictures of them on her phone. The three of them looked absolutely adorable together, when they were all—Sheldon would disagree with the term—cuddled up like that. It was a true father and child moment, and she knew by the warm feeling inside of her that Sheldon had really formed a connection with the twins. Even if she knew that he was still going to have a lot of adjusting to do, but at that particular moment, she didn't care; because this was just too cute for words.

It was also when she realized that she was dead exhausted from their little bachelorette party and opted to take a short nap in the adjoining bed. It was only for a little bit, and she knew that Leonard would wake her up when he returned from their party. Sleep just felt perfect, right now, and the dream she had, that night, was just too good to wake up from.

Fighting crime as a superhero family seemed like an awesome idea; especially when Sheldon didn't force her to wear a dark haired wig.

* * *

The next day, Penny woke up to find Sheldon staring down at her with that pinched expression he always had when he was upset. He was either going to (a) scold her for sleeping in his room without saying so (b) give her a lengthy lecture on how she is a nuisance in his life and that she was getting a strike for this (c) blow her to pieces via his mind or (d) greet her good morning with a smile and offer her breakfast. She kinda hoped it was (d) but this was Sheldon; there was a bigger chance of him rainbows shooting out of his eyes than her getting the latter.

"G'morning, Sheldon," she yawned, stretching her arms out. "Whatcha staring at me for?"

Sheldon frowned his how-do-you-not-know-what-I'm-doing frown that he always sent her. It was a bit too early to look so upset, but, she'd let it pass since she just tagged along in this trip. "You changed your shampoo to coconut."

"Huh?"

"I said; you changed your shampoo to coconut. Stop this madness and switch back to green apple." He plucked a piece of tissue from a box and gently pressed it at the corner of her mouth. "You drool too much. I thought that you'd choke on it in while you were sleeping—it nearly gave Leonard a panic attack because of it. Anyway, get dressed, we're having breakfast in twenty minutes." He huffed his 'impatient with the world' huff and moved out of her vision; the twins sitting at the edge of his bed, watching their morning cartoons.

Well, that went better than she thought. It lacked the smile and the greeting of (d), but, she'd take what she can get. Like the people always say; one step at a time.


	18. Location Withdrawal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sheldon makes a big move.

Today—Sheldon noted—Andy's blue eyes (finally!) changed into a light green that was just a tad bit lighter than Penny's, nevertheless, it was something that reminded him even more of his former neighbor. Personality wise, though, his son was like a miniature version of him—except for the over optimism and friendliness that was something he also got from his mother. Well, that was according to what Raj told him.

Another interesting thing he noticed was that no matter how many times he harangued their landlord, he still didn't change his mind about selling the apartment building. Not even two hundred—rather incriminating—letters did the trick.

Which brought them to their current conundrum.

"—no, no!  _You_  listen to  _me_ , understand? Or must I dumb it down to an elementary school level for you to comprehend this violation you are currently making?" Sheldon hissed; his knuckles turning white from how hard he was gripping the phone. "I do not care if you gave me a notice two months, ago—you can't just terminate our lease like that! No, it does not matter if everyone else in the building understands… no, don't you dare hang!—he hung up."

The sounds of angry mouse clicking filled the room before Leonard broke the heavy silence. "I still can't believe that you didn't tell me that the landlord told you—two months, ago, to be specific—that he was selling the building!" He tore his gaze away from his laptop that showed various apartment listings and threw Sheldon a glare. "If you just told me about it—instead of keeping it to yourself!—we could have at least tried to find some place new to live in!"

Sheldon frowned at him as he redialed their landlord's number, "now's not the time to play the blame game, Leonard."

"Fine! Then, what do you suggest we do?" Leonard turned his chair to face him. "I'm listening."

"We put up a good fight, of course!" The experimental physicist groaned and Sheldon slammed the phone back to its cradle. "The nerve of that man. We should file a legal complaint about him in advanced for the inhuman treatment he will be giving us in two days! If he kicks us out, we'll be homeless! I don't want to be homeless. I'm a universally respected physicist and future Nobel laureate—I  _can't_  be homeless!"

"Then, stop whining and just pick an apartment you like!" Leonard snarled, swiveling back to his laptop. Sheldon stared at the phone for another second before trudging towards his roommate. "Okay, I have three places that are fine with me, are in the price range of this apartment and most important of all, I think would be acceptable with you. This is the first one," he hit a key and an apartment appeared, "it's a two bedroom apartment with one bathroom, the building has a laundry room on the first floor and there are only thirty apartments. It's a bit smaller than this one—and it's just a couple of blocks from the university—but it looks okay."

Sheldon narrowed his eyes after he surveyed the pictures of the apartment. "Nn. Did you see the way the door opens?"

"No, what about it?" Leonard squinted at the image of the foyer. "It looks okay."

"Both the doorknob and the direction it swings open are to the  _left_. We are both right handed, and—after two months of watching them draw—so are my progeny. We can't live in an apartment specialized for left handed people, Leonard. Don't be silly."

Leonard resisted the urge to roll his eyes and clicked on the next bookmarked website. "Fine, here's the other one. It has three bedrooms, one bathroom and one powder room, and a pretty big living room. With the third bedroom, we can finally have that collection room we've always wanted to have. What do you think?"

Sheldon leaned over his roommate's shoulder and scowled. "Leonard, this apartment has a balcony. A  _balcony_. Which is practically a gigantic sign telling marauders to just step right through and repeat the terrible events of 2010—as if we haven't been traumatized enough! Balconies are  _always_  the gateway to easy access robberies, especially if you have long flowing hair—although, that was a window… but, I can see it happening in a balcony as well. Like the ill fated story of Romeo and Juliet."

Nine years of living together with Sheldon Cooper seemed to be enough for Leonard to  _not_  strangle him. "I'm not even going to respond to that. Okay, you're going to flip about this one, but, let me explain first." He clicked on the next listing which was of a dainty two story house that on Euclid Avenue. "This—"

"—Leonard, are you out of your mind—"

"—let me explain first!" The bespectacled man cut in, glaring up at his roommate. "I wasn't really looking for houses, but then this one appeared on the 'agent's other listings' and I considered the pros of living in a house. Think about it; if we have a house, we won't have to worry about new tenants moving under and above our apartment. Without other tenants, we can conduct experiments without worrying that our laser will make a hole down in the Danforth's ceiling. With just the two of us, you won't ever have to deal with befriending other tenants—oh, and you can have your own laundry room and won't have to share it with anyone other than me. Well?"

Sheldon hummed as he considered what the eager looking physicist said. "I  _would_  love my own laundry room."

For a moment, Dr. Leonard Hofstadter thought that he had finally found the right house.

He did not.

"If we are to split rent on a house, whose name will we place on the lease? If we do settle that rather annoying conundrum, wouldn't we face more complicated problems such as befriending  _all_  of our neighbors and their families? Which means everyone living on the street, compared to the mere twenty-nine tenants in this apartment? And which of us will move out when you finally decide on giving up on your career to start a family? Did you even consider the endless problems we will experience if we move into a house?"

Leonard stared long—and hard—at his roommate and wondered if killing Sheldon would be worth the pain that Penny would mercilessly inflict on him. "Forget about it. Here," he clicked on the next bookmarked listing, "here's another set of apartments that you might like." Sheldon shrugged behind him as the front door swung open.

"Hey guys," the intruder (who never bothered to knock) named Penny greeted, tossing her bag on the couch as she closed the door behind her. "The weirdest thing just happened to me as I entered the building. There were, like, ten moving trucks parked outside and about two dozen movers—from different companies—transporting furniture out of the building. Then, everyone was saying goodbye to me and asking for me to never forget them while getting my number." She said from the hall, checking on the twins in their room. "Is something wrong?"

Sheldon ignored the accusing finger that Leonard directed at him and turned to face the blonde who plopped down on the couch. "Three months ago, some undisclosed company offered our greedy little landlord—whom, I shall not name due to my current hatred for his every being—a hefty amount of money to buy this building for unknown purposes and he agreed to sell it. Now, the landlord is giving each of us four months worth of rent while forcing us to move out of here until Thursday, or else." He muttered something under his breath before eyeing Penny and turning back to Leonard to house hunt.

Penny blinked as Sheldon peered over Leonard's shoulder, yanking the laptop and placing it on the vacant part of the desk. So, they needed a place to live, huh… "Uh, I know this is gonna sound crazy—and it totally will—but why don't you guys stay with us in the meantime?" The two physicist both paused and slowly (dramatically) turned to face her; as if she had suggested something so unexpectedly important that none of them thought of that normally led to the protagonists (in crime stories) realizing who the killer was before racing out to find him.

"Elaborate. Now." Sheldon ordered, looking exactly like one of those detectives that—for some reason—could not crack the case. She watched too much crime-mystery shows.

"Well, if you move in with us, you can each have a room of your own. And all of your crap will fit cause I still haven't found the time to go furniture shopping. You won't have to pay rent, just do the grocery shopping for me—I'm too busy to do it, plus the twins always have dinner here at your place, anyway. It's within walking distance from the university—about ten minutes, I guess—so, you can just walk to work if Leonard can't drive you, or you can hitch a ride with me. My house is in an awesome neighborhood and is pretty secured; so, you won't have any problems with getting robbed again or getting mobbed by the paparazzi." She tapped a finger on her chin in thought then snapped her fingers. "Oh! Oh! And I have my own laundry room that can be all yours, Sheldon!"

She sent the quirky physicist a wide smile before he turned to Leonard and started whispering something to him. She found no problems with them moving in; it would be nice to have actual adults around for once. With the twins sleeping half of the time, the house was often lonely to live in. She often missed having to just cross the hall to converse with someone around her age. And her neighbors weren't as friendly as she originally thought they would be; which meant that she had no friends in the area. Zero. Nada. Zilch.

Plus, she could really use Sheldon's awesome cleaning and organizational skills for her closet—as much as she loved Sheila, her housekeeper, no one was better than Sheldon in cleaning. And Leonard made the best coffee, and with the two of them waking up ridiculously early (not that she didn't wake up early to get to the studio or to finish up the last scenes of Hindsight) she was sure that there would always be a cup of joe waiting for her in the morning. Halo night also seemed really fun considering the fact that she hadn't played a good four-on-four game since before she left.

It hadn't occurred to her (until now) that she  _really_  missed her old life. Sucky job, dying car, apartment that always had one utility cut off—it seemed miserable but it was actually pretty fun. Especially when you add in the scheduled meals, HALO night, everyone eating takeout together, the experiments she never understood, more science crap and laundry night. It was a bit hard to believe that she had somehow managed to survive two whole years without any of those. As the saying goes; you never really appreciate something until it's gone. Although, she was hoping that she could do something about it.

"We've come to a decision," Sheldon said, cutting through her thoughts as Leonard grinned beside him.

"Oh, really? What is it?"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow and gave her… some sort of half smile that kinda looked like a happy one. "We'll take it—on one condition."

* * *

Raj lifted the box (with great difficulty) and placed it on the multi-level heavy lifting device—as Howard called his pulley/dumb waiter knock off invention—before wiping the sweat off his forehead. "Dude! What the hell is in this box? It's heavier than me!"

Leonard eyed the words on the box, "it's just my jackets," he tapped the top, "see? Jackets." He walked over to the pulley and pressed the go button; the lift hovering down the stairs. "If this didn't take up the entire stairs, Howard might actually make a fortune off this."

"I know, right?" Howard chuckled, placing a box on the lift down. "NASA's actually planning on putting it up in the International Space Station once I find a way for it to gravitate."

Sheldon walked out of the apartment and loudly dropped a box on the lift. "It is ridiculous how it took us a day to clear out this apartment." He slammed his hand on the green button which caused Howard to wince. That had to hurt. "Nevertheless, we have nearly emptied out the entire apartment, save for a few decorations here and there—which, I will leave up to you as I am sure that the movers that Penny hired are doing a terrible job of just cramming our belongings in that truck." He motioned for Raj to remove the MLHLD and grumbled.

"Wait, what do you mean that you're leaving it to me?" Leonard asked as Sheldon shoved the cables to Howard. "My room's empty, yours is the one that still has items."

"Exactly. Now, that we are moving out, it is no longer my room and can now be entered by anyone. Plus, I don't like doing tedious things—like removing pictures off the wall and checking if we left anything. Which is why I'm going to go down to check the trucks and you'll do the aforementioned activities." He gave Leonard a small smile and clapped a hand on his shoulder. "Good luck. Raj, Howard come with me." Raj and Howard groaned and followed Sheldon down the stairs, taking the MLHLD apart as they did.

Leonard sighed as he reentered the apartment; he knew that Sheldon still hadn't fully realized what they were about to do, thus his decision of moving everything out of the apartment within a day. His quirky roommate did not do well under pressure (of moving out and finding a new place to live) and absolutely did not adapt well to change. Which was why it was so flabbergasting how quickly he agreed to moving in with Penny. It barely even took ten minutes for him to consider it—yet it took him an hour to decide what movie they'd watch.

Maybe, he really was changing and none of them just realized it, yet. He still hated change—which was reflected in how he was acting like Maddie on a bad morning—but it looked like he was a bit more open to it now. Moving to a new house was  _big_  for anyone, especially since they lived in 4A for nearly ten years. Even he still couldn't process the fact that they were moving, but he was just pretending that it didn't bother him so that Sheldon wouldn't blow a fuse when he finally realized what they were doing.

It was hard to  _not_ get emotional when you leave your home of nine years. And that was big, considering the fact that he didn't even feel sad when he left for Princeton—which, was actually just a half hour drive from their house, but that wasn't important. He loved his time in apartment 4A (even with Sheldon's crazy antics) and he had a feeling that everything was going to change, soon.

He grabbed a small box off of the counter and walked to Sheldon's (former) room; stopping at the sight of the blonde who was staring thoughtfully at something on the wall. "Hey, are you alright?"

Penny started, an eyebrow shooting up as she turned to face him. "Oh, hi. Yeah, I'm fine, just… thinking about some things."

Leonard nodded silently while he removed a picture of all of the DC heroes off of the wall. "What's on your mind?" He placed the frame in the box and moved to the Marvel version.

"I just never saw any of this happening," she said with a small sigh, "two years ago, whenever someone asked my what I'd be doing by now, I'd say; I'll be a really famous actress, living in a high end apartment but would still be the same girl that plays HALO with the geniuses that live across the hall. I didn't think that I'd be right—'cept for the apartment, my house is  _way_  better—but I never guessed that you guys would move out of this place. I really thought that you'd live here forever. It's kinda surreal."

"I know what you mean, I thought that I'd live in this apartment with Sheldon forever. Kinda horrifying at first, but he's okay as my surrogate family and it seems wrong to just leave him. Although, we're not really moving out by choice—we're practically getting evicted." He chuckled awkwardly, barely glancing at the silent actress. "Sheldon might seem as if he's okay with this gigantic change happening, but he's really not. He's just not showing it because we'd be homeless if he remained stubborn."

"Well, that's Sheldon for you. Even when you think you've got him all figured out, he does something so un-Sheldon like that it makes you wonder if you ever really knew him."

Leonard smiled, recalling the elevator incident where Sheldon saved him from  _a lot_  of trouble. "Yeah, I agree with you there. He's stubborn and quirky and condescending most of the time, but he really does have his moments." He moved the box to his hip, stepping back to see what the blonde was staring at. "The infamous signed Leonard Nimoy napkin. Nostalgic, isn't it?"

She nodded, her gaze still glued to the frame. "It is. I can still remember walking up to him and asking for his signature. And how happy Sheldon was when I gave it to him."

"Hey," he called, turning to her with a smirk, "I thought that the only thing you'd give him was the napkin, not the healthy ovum? I can recall him talking about needing a healthy ovum and you saying that the only thing you're giving him is the napkin—what happened?" Penny reacted by lightly hitting him on the arm as he stifled back a laugh. "Although, the healthy ovum was for a mini Leonard Nimoy, not a mini Sheldon Cooper. Oh! Oh! When then twins are old enough to drive, you should get them a Mini Cooper since they're mini Coopers!"

There was an amused grin on Penny's face and Leonard knew that he wasn't going to feel the wrath of junior rodeo just yet. It was always nice when you could freely joke about what would have been the giant baby elephants in the room, two years ago as if it wasn't a big deal. "Ha ha, very funny, Leonard. It's not like any of this was planned, you know. But I have to admit, I should have seen this coming." She slowly lifted the frame from the hook and sent it a small, sad smile before gently placing it in the box. "That seemed like some sort of foreshadowing, huh?"

"I'd say that it was ominous, but you might hogtie and castrate me," he joked, laughing softly as the aforementioned man walked into the room, an exasperated look on his face. "You look… tired?"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow at him, eyeing the box on his hip and huffed. "I cannot understand why it took the movers ten minutes to comprehend the instructions I gave them. Thanks to me, the insides of those trucks now look like an expertly played game of Tetris." He tapped the plastic hook, swiping the surface to check for dust. There was none. "With that done, everything is in the trucks and are all ready for transportation. Howard are Raj are already in their car and I have double checked anything we might have forgotten to pack for you. We're ready to go."

The theoretical physicist motioned towards the door, and the two silently complied; giving him a moment alone in his room to say 'goodbye' in his own way. After half a minute, Sheldon appeared from his room, stopping in the middle of the living room to stand beside the nostalgic Leonard. "So, this is it. Nine years of living here and now, we're moving out. Kind of feels like we're getting rid of something that's an essential part of life. It's a bit… emotional isn't it?"

Penny watched as Sheldon's jaw clenched, looking as if he was holding back a few tears. She glanced at Leonard—who was hastily wiping away his tears—then back at the silent physicist. She could tell by his frown that he was reminiscing on all of the moments he had with Leonard (and with his eidetic memory, that meant all of it) and was obviously doing his best not to cry. The whack-a-doodle had always had a problem with showing his true emotions. Even when it was perfectly okay to cry.

"I know it's a lot to take in, sweetie, but it's gonna be okay." She placed a hand on his shoulder in an effort to comfort him, noticing that he didn't even flinch at the physical contact. "I once heard Bailey telling Gregg that the only thing that's constant is change. Granted, it was about Gregg's favorite pasta in some restaurant tasting different, but I think that it's appropriate, now. Besides, even Homo Novus should have a change of pace every decade or so." She gave him a reassuring smile before stepping back. "The location may change, but you're still the beautiful mind genius guy that's gonna win the Nobel and nothing can change that."

He sighed, visibly relaxing (then wincing) as Leonard loudly blew his nose in his handkerchief. "Yes… it seems that you're right. A simple change of address will not alter anything about me—other than my address information, of course. Though, I must admit; it is a bit uncomfortable to think that the place that I considered my home—and where many of us met—will be reduced to a pile of rubble in a couple of days. This could have been the fortunate building where I would have proved String Theory. What a shame."

Leonard smiled at him, his eyes slightly red due to his crying. "I know how you feel, buddy. I love this apartment more than the house I grew up in; it's tough to say goodbye. But, you know what? We'll be alright. This is just another chapter—no, experiment, in our lives that we get to try. This is going to be fun, I'm sure."

"Motivational speeches don't suit you, Leonard," Sheldon said, shaking his head in (mock?) embarrassment. "It only makes things more uncomfortable." He stepped out into the hall, motioning for them to follow after him as an annoying series of honks—Raj's as the moving trucks' horns were even more irritating—blared outside the building. Once the two were out, he moved to close the door and paused; nine years, five months, three weeks and twenty-six days worth of memories of his life in 2311 N. Los Robles flashed in his mind. "It just occurred to me that this was where we first met."

Penny's eyebrows rose at what Sheldon said; Leonard blubbering beside her. Where they first met? Did he mean the two if them, or him and Leonard? They met here in the hall—well,  _he_  was in the hall and she was in her apartment (it was the other way around when he met Leonard) which meant that he was talking about her. Cause really, they met at the hall. There were no buts about it. Even if she didn't have an eidetic memory like him, she could still remember the day that she first met them—

—and she looked up to see 4A filled with furniture and memories.

_"Oh, hi!"_

_"Hi."_

_"Hi."_

_"Hi."_

_"Hi."_

_"Hi?"_

_"This looks like some serious stuff, Leonard, did you do this?"_

_"Actually that's my work."_

_"Wow."_

_"Yeah, well, it's just some quantum mechanics, with a little string theory doodling around the edges. That part there, that's just a joke, it's a spoof of the Bourne-Oppenheimer approximation."_

_"So, you're like, one of those, beautiful mind genius guys."_

_"Yeah."_

_"This is really impressive."_

__"No one can be that attractive and be this skilled at a video game!"_ _

_"Okay, nice and cozy, okay, I'll see you later."_

_"Wait. Will you please rub this on my chest."_

_"Oh, Sheldon, can't you do that yourself?"_

_"Vaporub makes my hands smell funny."_

_"But Sheldon…"_

_"Please, please, please, please, please, please, please."_

_"I can't believe I'm doing this."_

_"No, no, counter-clockwise or my chest hair mats."_

_"Sorry."_

_"Can you sing Soft Kitty?"_

_"What?"_

_"My mom used to sing it to me when I was sick."_

_"I'm sorry, honey, I don't know it."_

_"I'll teach you. Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur, happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr purr purr. Now you."_

_"Soft kitty, warm kitty…"_

_"Little ball of fur. Keep rubbing."_

_Knock, knock, knock. "Penny." Knock, knock, knock. "Penny." Knock, knock, knock. "Penny."_

_"Sheldon, honey, I've told you, it's a small apartment, you only have to knock one time."_

_"Sheldon: Please, please, I don't have a lot of time. Look, Ramona finally dozed off, and I need you to help me get rid of her."_

_"Get rid of her how?"_

_"I don't know, but apparently I'm in some kind of relationship, and you seem to be an expert at ending them."_

_"Excuse me?"_

_"I see man after man leaving this apartment never to return."_

_"Okay, first of all, it is not man after man."_

_"Dr. Cooper?!"_

_"Hide me."_

_"Hide you?"_

_"I formally request sanctuary."_

_"Why aren't you working?"_

_"Um… she distracted me. I told you, Penny, I don't have time for your nonsense, I have important things to do."_

_"Oh, man."_

_"I know what's going on here."_

_"Really? Well, then will you explain it to me?"_

_"You're in love with Dr. Cooper."_

_"Uh, yeah, no, that's not it."_

_"Don't try to deny it. He's a remarkable man, but you have to let him go."_

_"Oh, gee, okay."_

_"I know it's hard, but he's a gift to the whole world, and we can't be selfish."_

_"Yeah, he's a gift all right."_

_"Sisters?"_

_"Um, sure, sisters. Holy crap on a cracker."_

__Knock, knock, knock. "Sheldon!" _Knock, knock, knock. "Sheldon!" _Knock, knock, knock. "Sheldon!"___ _

_"Yes?"_

_"Where are my clothes?"_

_"Your clothes?"_

_"Yes, I left them in the washers and when I went down to get them, they were gone."_

_"Really? Despite the sign that says 'Do not leave laundry unattended'?"_

_"Sheldon, where are my clothes?"_

_"You know, I do recall seeing some female undergarments. Where was that? Oh, yes, earlier this evening I happened to gaze out the window and a brassiere caught my eye. Do those look familiar?"_

_"How the hell did you get them up on that telephone wire?"_

_"When you understand the laws of physics, Penny, anything is possible. And may I add, mwah-ha-ha!"_

_"Get them down."_

_"Apologize."_

_"Never."_

_"Well, then may I suggest you get a very long stick and play panty pinata."_

_"Ah, good, Penny, you're here to exchange gifts. You'll be pleased to know I'm prepared for whatever you have to offer."_

_"Okay, here."_

_"I should note I'm having some digestive distress, so, if I excuse myself abruptly, don't be alarmed. Oh, a napkin."_

_"Turn it over."_

_"To Sheldon, live long and prosper. Leonard Nimoy."_

_Yeah, he came into the restaurant. Sorry the napkin's dirty. He wiped his mouth with it."_

_"I possess the DNA of Leonard Nimoy?!"_

_"Well, yeah, yeah, I guess. But look, he signed it."_

_"Do you realize what this means? All I need is a healthy ovum and I can grow my own Leonard Nimoy!"_

_"Okay, all I'm giving you is the napkin, Sheldon."_

_"Okay, I got a box, but there's no key in here. Just letters."_

_"That's the wrong box. Put it back."_

_"Oh, Sheldon, are these letters from your grandmother?"_

_"Don't read those letters!"_

_"Oh, look, she calls you Moon Pie. That is so cute."_

_"Put down the letters!"_

_"I'm back."_

_"What up, Moon Pie?"_

_"Nobody calls me Moon Pie but Meemaw!"_

_"Why do you have the Chinese character for soup tattooed on your right buttock?"_

_"It's not soup, it's courage."_

_"No, it isn't. But I suppose it does take courage to demonstrate that kind of commitment to soup."_

_"How did you see it? You said you wouldn't look."_

_"Sorry. As I told you, the hero always peeks—"_

"Penny—" she jumped at the hand that was awkwardly placed on her shoulder and she turned to find Sheldon sending her a look of empathy. "You are crying. You know that I do not do well with tears, and Leonard has cried enough for the three of us." He glanced at the experimental physicist who was leaning against the wall, sobbing. "It's pathetic and understandable at the same time."

The blonde blinked—unaware that she was crying—and quickly wiped the tears from her eyes. "Wow, I didn't realize that I was crying… I just have so much fond memories of this place that I couldn't help it." Sheldon retracted his hand and she sighed, "it's kinda hard to believe that this'll be the last time we'll ever get to stand here."

Sheldon looked away as Leonard made an effort to compose himself. "Well, like you said; it is necessary to have a change of pace every now and then. Nostalgia is for those without my eidetic memory—this is merely a place that I used to live now. I was bound to move out someday."

She guessed that he was probably grieving in his own way. Some cried (Leonard), some got lost in the memories (her) and some kept their emotions to themselves; Sheldon. A part of her wanted him to open up about how he felt with this whole moving thing, but that was just how he dealt with it. Which was kind of funny since he was so vociferous (Gregg used that word to define Bailey) with everything he disliked but had a hard time showing his emotions.

He'd always been one of a kind.

"Hey guys," Howard called, appearing at the stairs, "my wedding is in a couple of days—I'm really not supposed to be here. so… chop chop." He jerked his thumb over his shoulder before trotting back down the stairs.

Leonard sucked in a deep, shaky breath then pushed himself off the wall. "Sorry for that, guys. Howard's right; we have to get going soon. It's almost twelve and I'm getting hungry."

"You sure it's not because of all that crying?" Penny teased, earning a smile from the weepy Leonard. "But he's right—we all took a day off for this, and we should get everything done so that we can make the most of it."

Sheldon nodded, glancing at the inside of the empty apartment one last time before closing the door and taking a deep breath. "That's that. We can just get pizza delivered while you arrange the furniture." He sniffed—Penny would be lying if she said that she didn't want to see him finally cry—and made his way down the stairs. "I didn't take an unwanted day off for nothing. Let's go, I still have to plan he emergency escape routes in Penny's house."

"I don't think that that's our priority right now," Leonard replied as he followed after his roommate.

Penny took one last glance around the hall and smiled; this apartment building would always have a special place in her heart. She was going to send the landlord a thank you note later for making her life better by allowing her to rent out 4B.

* * *

"Five steps to the right, two more. Now, a little to the left and… perfect!"

Leonard, Howard and Raj all groaned as they placed the couch in the designated spot; Sheldon hopping off of it and grinning. "I think I may have found my new 0, 0, 0, 0! The angle for conversation and television watching is correct; windows at two different directions for a cross breeze, and—seeing that it is already getting chilly—the radiator and that nonhazardous looking fireplace will be more than enough to keep me warm! Wait, it might be even better considering the fact that there has only been one other family who lived here compared to the ten tenants in 4A before me!"

Howard snorted while he watched Sheldon happily plop down on his spot. "If you love it so much, why couldn't you have just pushed the couch yourself instead of sitting on it—if I may point out, the entire time—while we did all of the hard work?"

"I had to find my 0, 0, 0, 0," replied Sheldon, "the only way I could've done that was by sitting on it, and finding the right metaphorical longitude and latitude of my new abode."

The three men grumbled, each taking a seat on the adjoining sectional as Penny entered the living room. "The twins are napping, and it looks like you've settled all of your stuff," she chirped, taking a seat at the opposite side of the couch, "my house is now about eighty-five percent full. Anyone else planning on moving in?"

Raj shook his head while Howard hummed, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "You know, that offer sounds  _really_  tempting—and that empty guest house just screams Howard!—but with the way the argument between my mom and Bernadette about me moving in with her is going, I'll pass."

Penny returned Howard's grin, "so, what are you guys planning on doing tonight?"

"Despite the change of location, Wednesday night will  _always_  be HALO night," Sheldon told her, a small competitive smirk forming on his face, "and although this is your house—and we are very grateful for you allowing us to stay here instead of a grimy cardboard box on the street—I will spare no mercy in beating you once and for all."

Raj leaned towards Howard, whispering something and causing the engineer to laugh. "I know! My mom has a bigger chance of losing weight than that happening."

"Uh, as much as I'd love to see you try, I can't," Penny admitted ruefully and the room grew quiet. Leonard paused from fixing their games on the shelf beside the sectional; Raj's face fell, Howard stopped laughing and she saw a brief look of disappointment on Sheldon's face. One so brief that she wasn't sure if she just imagined it. "I have to meet up with the Hindsight cast to discuss the scenes that we're going to add and the ones we have to reshoot—but, if we finish up early, I promise to catch up."

Leonard sent her a small smile before he placed the HALO case on the coffee table. "Well, if you change your mind you're free to join us, and there's always a next time. We'll be here for at least a month, there's still plenty of time to team up with us to kill Sheldon."

"If it's not too much, could you please get Scarlett Johansson to make me an audio recording and a George Clooney one for my mom?" Howard asked, throwing her his phone—which, she caught effortlessly. "My mom's been in love with him since—no, Raj you can't get one. Raj said that he wants one from Scarlett, too, as long as it's not from that Collin guy."

Penny quirked a confused eyebrow while Howard snorted as Raj whispered something in his ear. "He's saying that you really shouldn't date him and that he's no good and some other crap that my mind is tuning out." Raj huffed. "Well, if you want to explain it to her, then, do it yourself. I'm good with Scarlett and George. You can even throw in one from you if you feel like it."

"Howard, that sounds wrong," the experimental physicist chastised Howard before turning back to her. "Are you planning on having dinner out or should we include you in our takeout? Sheldon allowed us to order something that isn't pizza in honor of our first day in our new home. We decided on Chinese mainly for the fortune cookies. Right, Sheldon?"

Sheldon shrugged, standing from his spot and walking over to the Xbox. "I don't believe in luck, but it  _is_  amusing when Raj thinks that his will actually happen. Like a puppy about to be played with."

Even though she  _really_  wanted to stay in and play HALO with them (and effortlessly beat Sheldon in his own game) this meeting was extremely important. So important that even the execs were going to be there. Well, that was what her agent said, so it must meant something kinda important. It was really just to discuss the scenes that would be replaced, film and reshot… and for a bit of early publicity. Any kind of publicity was still publicity; even if the movie wasn't going to be released until May.

Maybe, she could find a way to escape the meeting early. She saw that sightly imagined look of disappointment Sheldon had when she told him that she wouldn't be able to hang out with them—he actually wanted her to join! Albeit it was to try (fail) at beating her, she didn't want to let him down. Or any of them down. It had been two and a half years since they all hang out together like they always did. When it was just her and her boys.

Looking down, she saw that she had a message from her agent saying that she had to be at the restaurant in half an hour. When it was her agent and not her assistant who texted reminders of her schedule, it meant that it was as important as it seemed. Ugh. "Hey guys, I have to get to the restaurant in half an hour. Is it alright if I go ahead?"

"Yeah, sure. We'll probably all be here when you get back," Leonard grinned, handing out the controllers for a warm up HALO game. "Take your time and have fun."

Penny mentally sighed as she stood up, "alright, I'm off. Don't forget to get the twins something healthy and don't have too much fun without me."

"We won't!" They—minus Sheldon—chorused, starting the four-on-four game.

She smiled sadly before making her way out of the living room; barely missing the way Sheldon glanced at her as she left.

* * *

If there was one word to describe the meeting they were having, it would be the word boring. Even the awesome food was not enough to salvage the worst meeting she had ever had in her life.

"—then we'll change scene 87 with the new script, does that sound—"

"—we can't reshoot the Paris scenes, it'll move the premiere date and—"

"—to cut scenes 134, 168 and 201 to make way for the—"

The executive producers, the writers and the directors were all engaged in a heated argument on what scenes were supposed to be cut, replaced and added. The execs wanted more action, the writers wanted to give the story more depth and the directors were getting mad that the execs were trying to change the direction that they wanted to go with the movie. For an hour now.

She honestly couldn't care less as she would do whatever they told her to do and there was nothing she could do about it. Both George and Scarlett were on their phones, playing some game that actually looked interesting. The rest of the cast (and crew) all looked bored as hell, and she seriously regretted not staying with the guys. HALO looked so much funner—as it had always been—than this meeting. All they had to do was give them the script and they'd all be on their merry way.

It really wasn't that hard to just hand bonded stack of papers—

"—have you been?"

Penny looked up from her phone to find Collin smiling at her from across the table.

When did he get here? "Uh… I'm good. Never better."

Collin raised an eyebrow—probably realizing that she hadn't been paying attention—and blinked. "Oh. Okay. So, I was watching TMZ a while ago, and they featured about three moving trucks arriving at your house. Are you moving out?"

Drat. She had forgotten all about the fact that that stupid gossip show loved snooping around for any dirt about her. Ever since the whole 'Genius guy is twins' father' incident, the paps had been doing their hardest to get more information about her and Sheldon's relationship. She even turned down a six figure offer for an exclusive interview about it. With that in mind, she should have been a bit more careful with the moving trucks.

Scarlett and a couple of the other people at their table simultaneously placed their phones down and turned to her; obviously interested in an update on her life. Why was everyone so interested in gossip, nowadays? Geez! "No, I'm not moving out. Sheldon—you all remember Sheldon, right?" Everyone nodded; they were all at the twins' birthday party, they should know who he was. "Well, if you knew him you'd know that he's the stubbornest person in the world—so, his landlord sold the apartment building he was living in and he tried to put up a fight until the day that they were supposed to move out came. So, I told him that he could stay with us in the meantime and he moved in this afternoon."

Everyone except Collin aww'ed, like what she did was some sort of romantic gesture that she certainly was not aware of. "Why are you all aww-ing at me like that?"

"Cause that's the sweetest and most romantic thing ever!" Jenny, their main writer chirped.

Crazy. They were all crazy. Especially with all those awed expressions they were sending her. What was so sweet and romantic about what she did? She was really just trying to be a good friend. Honestly. Was it because she forgot to mention Leonard? "Actually, it's not just him—"

"Are you even dating this guy?" Collin (rudely) interjected, interrupting the chattering that the crew and the cast were doing about what she had revealed. Even the execs became quiet at his question. "It's barely been a month since you guys were spotted together—and now he's moving in with you? The paparazzi will exaggerate this story as much as they can. Do you even know him enough to let him live with you?"

"Hey," George cut in, his face stern as Scarlett placed a comforting hand on Penny's shoulder. She didn't realize that she was already shaking in anger at what the auburn haired man was saying. "I think Penny can make her own decisions and Dr. Cooper seems like a nice man. Scary brain, but a good fellow, nonetheless."

Collin scoffed—George didn't seem to like that reaction with the way his frown deepened. "I'm just being a good, concerned friend. Come on, isn't it odd how he suddenly appears once Penny won the Emmy? What if he's just using you for your fame?"

Sheldon using her for her fame? Unless knowing a celebrity was a plus point in winning the Nobel, there was no way that Sheldon would use her for her fame. He didn't even care about celebrities unless they were in a sci fi or superhero movie/show. He just stared at George when she introduced him—he knew Scarlett and was actually very elated to meet her—and once George was gone, he asked Gregg what he was known for. Sheldon didn't care about that—they were friends from even before she was famous!

And how dare he question how much she knew Sheldon. Yes, he was quirky; egotistical, condescending, arrogant, and just a tiny bit crazy—but, that was just him being Sheldon! He wasn't going to kill her while she was sleeping; he wouldn't even want to be in the same room as her when she was sleepy! And what the heck wrong with her letting him move in? It was her house, she could do anything she wanted to do with it! And who cares if she was or wasn't dating him? He was the twins' father, and that was something that wasn't ever going to change—

—she didn't even realize that her nails were doing a number on the wooden table with how angry she was getting with her costar. She should've just called in sick and played with the guys. "Sheldon is my friend, and it's my house. I can do what I want with it, Collin. Why are you being such a jerk?"

"A jerk?" He repeated, incredulity dripping from his tone. "Penny, I'm just concerned. This guy sounds like trouble and I don't want that for you. The paps have been hounding on you ever since they saw you at the airport together. This smells like—"

"Collin, George is right," their director cut in form the end of the table, "Penny can decide for herself. Her decisions have nothing to do with you, and I suggest that this unrelated discussion end now. There are still a lot to discuss and we cannot spend all day raving about something that does not concern us. This is a business appointment not an office water cooler." Collin huffed, crossing his arms as he slumped into his chair.

She really should have just stayed at home; then, she wouldn't have had a strong urge to go all Carrie Gordon—her scheming, conniving, kick ass character in Hindsight—on his annoying self. Maybe she should've allowed her dad to clock him at the party. Too bad it would be too much of a scandal if she hogtied him eight now.

That definitely would've made her feel better.

* * *

"—you ever thought about it? They look like an item—Howard cover my back!—and that's something you should really be worried about."

Howard glanced at the babbling Raj and switched his weapon. "What exactly are you going on about?"

Raj dodged a plasma grenade, gnawing on his lip as Sheldon threw another grenade at him. "I told you to cover my back, Howard! Anyway, I was talking about Collin and Penny."

"What about them?" Leonard asked, eyes still glued to the screen.

"What if after this meeting, Penny and him go on a date? What if something happens?!" Raj paused, cringing dramatically in disgust at what he said. "Eww. I actually do not want that to happen! Ah! Howard I told you to cover me!"

The engineer grumbled as Sheldon and Leonard won, placing the controller down for the time out for eating. "I would've covered you if you hadn't babbled about something stupid. Besides, why would you care about Penny's romantic life?"

Leonard handed out the take out containers, "if I may weigh in, out of all of the boyfriends Penny had, Collin has to be the one I dislike the most. So, I can agree with Raj on that thought."

"Even more than Zack and Kurt?" Howard asked in disbelief.

"That's different."

"Really? Even Kurt? You hated that guy. You even planned on melting his tires when he was visiting Penny."

Leonard huffed, accidentally pouring too much soy sauce on his rice. "I told you it's different! They're their own case. Those guys are just your average neanderthals that fell for the charm that Penny has. Collin is just downright annoying. Did you even see how smug he was when he beat our record at the strength test? It was like one bar higher than mine."

"You sound as if you still like Penny," Raj pointed out, noticing that the game resumed and was changed to a mission battle. "Don't tell me you still do?!"

Leonard vehemently shook his head, his eyes wide in astonishment. "No! Of course not! Penny is my friend, so I have to look out for her. And as her ex boyfriend, I kinda have the right to scrutinize any relationship she's going to have. Kinda."

They all turned to the silent Sheldon, who was now playing an online PVP game with Maddie sitting on his lap.

"How about you, Sheldon?" Howard started, picking up a piece of pot stickers with his chopsticks. "Your dating her, right? What do you think about Collin?"

The theoretical physicist snorted, his scowl deep and unfaltering. "I have no opinion of him and have no intentions of doing so. Now, will you please stop bothering me as I am planning on defeating this noob from Moscow."

Maddie tilted her head back and stared at her grumpy father. "Daddy mad?"

"I'm not mad. I am just in the middle of a very intense game and cannot afford to lose."

Andy—who had been playing at their play area—toddled over to the leather couch and stood in front of Sheldon. "Daddy mad."

"I am not mad, Andy. Now, please move or else daddy will lose the game and then he'll be mad." Sheldon calmly said as the miniature Penny immediately moved; Maddie clambering off his lap and following after her twin. The toddler was far from blocking the way, but he just wanted the inane discussion to be over. "Also, I am not dating Penny. Please, keep that in mind whenever you think of involving me in your silly little game of gossip." He gave a little cheer of triumph when he won the game and placed the controller down so that he could eat.

Raj handed him the tray of dumplings, "it's not really gossip, dude, we just wanted to hear your opinion of him since you're practically the closest thing to a boyfriend. I think?"

Howard tittered, causing Sheldon to glare at him. "You don't have to be on the defensive, buddy. I was just kind of joking. Kind of. Just wanted to tease ya' and see how you'd react. So… when are the twins going to get sibli—ow! What was that for, Leonard?"

"You're really not helping, Howard."

Sheldon snarled as he stared at the container in his hands. "I'm in a conundrum. I'm not sure if I should eat this here in the living room or in the kitchen, as there is now an actual place to eat." He glanced at his friends who all paused, "should we move?"

"I don't mind, the three of us eat here in the living room all the time."

The four men all jumped at the intruder (?) and Sheldon noted that due to the position of the living room—which was at the very back of the house—it was nearly impossible to tell if someone arrived. He'd have to talk to Penny about the security of the house later.

"Why are you back so early?" Howard inquired while Penny took a seat beside Sheldon. "We thought that you wouldn't be back until another hour or so."

The blonde grabbed the untouched container of food that she guessed was hers (screw her diet) and smiled. "It wasn't much of an important meeting—and besides, I'm not going to miss a special housewarming game of HALO. That, and the look on Sheldon's face when I beat him down to the ground!"

Sheldon pursed his lips, eyeing the way that Penny ate her dumpling on purpose. He grabbed two controllers and handed her one before changing it to a twon-on-two game. She placed her container down and prepared for the game. "This may be your home that we're living in and that it is your generosity that we should appreciate, but let it be known that I am not going to be easy on you just because—"

His eyes widened as he barely dodged a plasma grenade and glared at Penny's smirking face. "Oh stop flirting with me, Cooper and dodge this!"

* * *

Two days. It had been two whole days since they moved into Penny's house, and he hadn't been able to sleep as well as he did in 4A ever since.

He theorized that he still hadn't adjusted to his new surroundings. Penny's house was extremely different from 4A. For instance, it took about a minute and sixteen seconds (he counted them) to get from his new room to the kitchen, compared to the mere ten seconds it took in 4A. The several hallways bothered him as well; the one on the second floor, the one connecting the rooms at front and the ones behind. 4A had one hallway, and that was the one going to the rooms.

It also felt odd to not have a front door to lock whenever he went out of the house. Apparently, Penny's house had the state of the art security system that put Howard's contraptions to shame. Plus, the huge electronic gate out front was also an assurance that they would never, ever get robbed. Another thing that irked him was the balcony in his room and how it overlooked the entire backyard. Back in 4A, the view from his room was the building next to them. And a set of fire escapes. Now, he had a pool, the Star Wars playground, a tennis court and a bunch of grass to stare at.

Although, he still had some (a lot) getting used to the house, he discovered that there was actually several perks to having a house. Like his own laundry room that no one but him—and Leonard and Penny's housekeeper—used. He was very impressed with Penny's choice in machines and laundry products and found that he had not a single problem with it. Plus, he loved not having to greet people he met in the lobby and in the halls. With the way the houses were spaced out, he never had to meet the neighbors.

It was also efficient how close the university was to the house. Penny hadn't been lying when she said that he could just walk there. The other day, he had forgotten to bring home a set of research papers thar he got his assistant to print at his office and Leonard refused to drive him. He tried walking, and it only took him eight and a half minutes to get there. Due to it being a good (excellent) neighborhood, there were zero shady people loitering around the area. Zero. Just a couple of afternoon joggers and dog walkers that seemed to be a bit too friendly,

All in all, living in Penny's house was turning out to be a good decision save for his sleeping problems.

Which was why he made himself an odd routine before he tried to sleep; wait for everyone to fall asleep, check on Leonard (who was in the opposite room), check on the twins, stand near Penny's door to listen if she was still breathing, head to the kitchen to have some chamomile tea, wait for him to get sleepy and finally go to sleep. It was a bit tedious at first, but he guessed that that was exactly why it was working. With his surroundings getting expanded, it took more to time to do more than it did before; thus making the routine enough to tire his mind into resting. It seemed to work and that was good enough for him.

Tonight, he was already on the fifth part of his routine; drinking tea. He had already checked on Leonard and the twins, who were all fast asleep and on Penny. He never really checked on her—in fear that the distance between her door and her bed would decrease, thus allowing an easy access for her to kill him—as he had learned from his mistake in breaking into her apartment (to clean) and opted to respect her privacy. Leonard had briefed him beforehand on how generous and kind it was for her to let them stay with them, and that they should behave accordingly in return.

Besides, he absolutely had no intentions of somehow getting punched in the throat (or hogtied or castrated) for breaking some sort of 'don't wake me up in the middle of the night' rule.

And so, he gently pried his ear from her door and made his way down to the kitchen. He accepted the fact that he was slightly homesick—and suffering from insomnia—but it was nothing that a good cup of tea wouldn't solve. It wasn't too late and he still had more than enough time for a good REM sleep. The fact that he no longer had to share a bathroom with Leonard and now had his own cut their travel time into half. Same with the university being at the end of the street. There was no longer a need to rush to work in the morning.

Sheldon stopped in his tracks once he noticed the figure that was shuffling around the kitchen. He found it a bit too late to be having a midnight snack, but given the circumstances, this person never found it too late to do anything. She did, however, seem to have a problem with it being too early. "Penny, what are you doing?"

The blonde sharply turned around to face him, her mouth stuffed with whipped cream and what he guessed was chocolate. He surveyed the mess on the counter; a jar of Nutella, half a can of peanuts, one fourth of a banana and a carton of milk that he knew—mainly due to living across from her for three years—was ingested without the consideration of using a glass. "Again, what are you doing?"

Penny slowly shook her head, swallowing the contents in her mouth before clearing her throat. "I was just having some dessert."

"More like diabetes…" he murmured, making his way to the kettle to prepare some tea. Change made him restless and sleeping in another house that wasn't his gave him insomnia. That was another reason why he disliked hotels. The thought of sleeping in a bed that countless unknown people slept in was far too unnerving for him. Moving wasn't as fun, either. It was good thing that tea always made him feel better. "Are you aware of the extreme sugar content that is present in all of those?"

"I don't know, I just felt like having something sweet," she admitted as she cleaned up the mess she made—something, Sheldon noted, was a bit surprising to see. She finally discovered what the word 'cleaning' meant. "I've been craving for anything sweet, recently."

Sheldon raised a curious eyebrow and reached the new tea box that Leonard got him. "Those symptoms sound familiar… are you pregnant?"

There was a clattering noise and he turned to see Penny gawking at him (in disbelief, probably) while the milk started to puddle at the corner of the counter. "Pregnant?! How am I—it's not even… I haven't… I haven't even had s—"

"Let me stop you right there," he interjected, grabbing a rag and wiping the spilt milk. No use of crying over it, he thought. "It was a suggestion—don't think much of it. Your overconsumption of sugar is already causing you to get paranoid. Drink some water to wash it off." The kettle whistled and he poured the water into his mug.

Penny nodded, getting herself a glass of water as he waited for the teabag to settle. "So… can't sleep, huh?"

Banalities. He'd never understand her love for engaging in banal chit chat, but as he was her mere guest, he'd comply. "Yes. It appears that my mind still has yet to comprehend the fact that I no longer reside in the place I've considered to be my home for over ten years, now."

The blonde nodded in understanding—as if she actually understood the itch in his brain that he just couldn't scratch. "Hmm, I don't really know a remedy for being homesick other than…" she furrowed her eyebrows and sent him an unsure smile, "want me to sing soft kitty for you?"

_"What do you want me to do?"_

_"Sing soft kitty."_

_"That's only for when you're sick."_

_"Homesick is a type of being sick."_

_"Come on, do I really have to?"_

_"I suppose we can stay up and talk."_

_"Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur; happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr, purr, purr."_

Sheldon smiled softly at the memory of him getting locked out of his apartment and staying the night over at Penny's. It seemed that that little occurrence was actually some sort of foreshadowing that was a bit blown out of proportions. Instead of getting locked out, he was forced to move out and live with the same blonde who said that he got locked out of the big ice thingy. How ironic. "As much as I appreciate the offer, I must decline. One can no longer be homesick when their is no home to long for."

"Well, think of this as your new home, sweetie. Mi casa su casa." She offered him a small empathetic smile. "Anyway, I'm just going to lighten the mood by changing the topic! Are you excited for Howard and Bernadette's wedding or what?"

"I have never enjoyed weddings, but as this is said to be a 'big' step for Howard, I guess I am." He shrugged, returning the tea box in the cupboard. "I even bought them a gift as Leonard claimed that it was proper social protocol to do so."

"Ah, the gift. I still haven't thought of one, but I think they'll understand." She placed the glass in the sink before returning to the stool she sat on. "I actually haven't even bought the twins' clothes, yet—which is a big problem, since they're the flower girl and the ring bearer."

In they end, they really did stay up talk. Maybe, he should have just accepted her offer of singing soft kitty—but, he didn't want her to think that it could be sung anytime one wanted to. "Clothes? Why can't you just make them wear the suit and the dress in their closet? I see nothing wrong with them."

"Sheldon," she started, her eyes twinkling at the thought of shopping, "this is a big event, and no child of mine will wear something subpar. I'm a trendsetter, and I would be a horrible mother if they won't look great—" because everyone cared about what two toddlers would wear at a wedding, "—which is why you're going to go shopping with us! No buts and no excuses!" The theoretical physicist stared at her beaming face in disbelief at what she said.

She was definitely the biggest enigma in his life.

"Suit yourself," he snarled, picking his mug up from the counter.

"That's exactly what I wanted to hear from you!" Penny chirped, sounding overly energetic. "Goodnight, sweetie!"

"Goodnight—" he paused under the doorframe, his annoying little flashback continuing where it left off.

_"Penny?"_

_"Yeah?"_

_"Thank you for letting me stay here."_

_"Aww, you're welcome, sweetie."_

Sheldon turned around to face her, noticing that she still hadn't moved from her spot. "Penny?"

She raised an eyebrow and glanced over her shoulder to look at him. "Yep?"

"Thank you for letting us stay here. We really appreciate it."

Penny blinked—trying to comprehend the fact that he was actually saying thank you—and grinned happily at him. The same way she had three years ago. "You're welcome, sweetie. Goodnight, Sheldon."

It was probably the tea that was making him feel all nostalgic. Nostalgia was for those without his eidetic memory. Now, he kind of felt like a cross between Leonard and Raj. How annoying.

"Goodnight, Penny."

* * *

Mornings for Penny were usually made up of her alarm creating a cacophony in an effort to wake her up; making an effort to stand and go to the bathroom, making breakfast for the three of them while her housekeeper, Sheila, was still on vacation, checking her phone and finding a dozen messages about her schedule for the day, waiting for the baby monitor to tell her that the twins were awake and having breakfast with said toddlers.

She often tried to  _not_  be grumpy in the morning for the twins, but when she goes to the twins' room and finds it empty, that was when all hell breaks loose.

"SHELDON! LEONARD! THE TWINS ARE MISSING!" She exclaimed—panicked, distressed, cried—as she jogged down the stairs, trying not to trip and overreact by crying. "THE TWINS AREN'T IN THEIR—"

Penny paused when she found Sheldon cooking something in the kitchen and Leonard and the twins all obediently sitting at the counter, eating their breakfast. "What the…"

"Oh! You're awake," Sheldon murmured, switching the stove off and facing her. "Good morning, Penny."

"Mrrnggh, Pnmmy!"

"Mhhngh, Mohmmmy!"

"Mnnhhnh, Mhm'mmy!"

She took a seat at the counter and was quickly assaulted (in a good way) by the delicious smell that emanated from whatever the hell Sheldon was making. "What are you doing?"

"Making breakfast." Sheldon simply replied, sliding an omelette from the pan into a plate. "I was unsure of what you wanted for breakfast—seeing as you have no food schedule whatsoever—so I decided on just making you a rather simple breakfast."

He placed the plate and a mug of coffee in front of her, causing her eyes to widen in wonder at what may be the best homemade breakfast she'd ever laid eyes on—and her first breakfast in this house that wasn't cereal, pancakes or Hot Pockets—and was about to eat. "Toast… sausages and an omelette?!"

"It's actually a ham and cheese omelette," Sheldon corrected, fixing his breakfast, "there's also some freshly made orange juice—would you like some? Leonard seems to enjoy drinking coffee and juice simultaneously."

She happily nodded and Sheldon poured her a glass, "Sheldon, you don't really have to do this, you know."

Leonard loudly swallowed the food in his mouth—obviously enjoying the rare occurrence that was Sheldon cooking breakfast—and wiped at his ketchup smeared face. "We decided that it's the least we can do, since you allowed us to live in your house. Sheldon here noticed that your freezer was mainly full of ice cream and Hot Pockets—and we all know that you can't live on Hot Pockets alone."

"Hey, I have some other stuff, too!" She said, taking a bite of the omelette and pausing to savor the way it melted in her mouth. "Oh god, this is the best! Keep making omelettes as good as these and I just might marry you."

Sheldon snorted before taking a seat beside her. "Don't be ridiculous, omelettes are only for Thursday mornings. We're having eggs benedict tomorrow."

Penny took another bite and sighed happily, "just keep cooking and I'll keep eating. Have I told you how great this tastes?"

Today, Penny realized that this big house was meant for more than just three people—and that she preferred it that way. She also realized that Sheldon moving in with them was one of her best decisions  _ever_.


	19. Wedding Occurrences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sheldon, Penny and the twins attend Howard and Bernadette's wedding.

Fact: Dr. Sheldon Cooper (B.S. M.S. M.A. Ph.D. Sc.D.) has always hated shopping.

Fact: Penny (sic) superstar actress galore loves shopping.

Fact: Penny will use any (out of this world) reason to go shopping.

Fact: One of those reasons are—supposedly—her (somehow) not wanting her children to not look presentable in what people (she) considers as a very important event.

Fact: Penny possesses remarkable convincing skills.

Fact: She also seems to possess a skill that can be called as the 'go shopping with us, or else' skill.

Fact: Said skill does not work on Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

Fact: The employee at Pottery Barn (somehow) gave him Java the Hut sheets instead of Luke Skywalker.

Fact: Leonard is a traitor for claiming that he couldn't drive him and that he ask Penny.

Fact: Penny is very cunning when it comes to quid pro quo.

Fact: Dr. Sheldon Cooper needs to get a license. Soon.

Fact: Dr. Sheldon Cooper  _is not_  happy.

"Oh, come on, there's no reason for you to be pouting!" The aforementioned woman laughed in front of him, obviously ignoring the fact that she knew why exactly he was pouting. "We're having a blast!"

He snorted. "False.  _You're_  having a blast— _I'm_ suffering from the cursed activity of shopping."

"Cursed—seriously?" She quirked an eyebrow, pausing and turning the shopping bag filled stroller towards him. "You shop all the time." He sent her a frown. "Comic books and those action figure collectible thingies! These new bed sheets! That's shopping."

Sheldon shook his head, "I hardly doubt that New Comic Book night is considered as shopping all the time, Penny." He raised the paper bag he was holding, "and went out to get them replaced—not to buy seven new unnecessary sets of sheets."

The blonde scoffed (rather dramatically) and looked down at Maddie who was holding onto her hand. "Isn't your father the most unbelievable person, ever? You liked the new princess sheets that Mommy got you, right?"

Maddie blinked and glanced at Andy. "What a sheet?"

"Please don't use the children to justify your shopaholic ways, Penny," he said, motioning for the blonde to continue walking. "We've been out for nearly three hours, now, and the only thing we've bought are things that are  _not_  on the agenda. I agreed to joining you in looking for toddler formalwear—in exchange for a ride to Pottery Barn—not accompanying you in buying every pair of shoes you see."

Penny rolled her eyes as they continued down the strip. "I didn't buy  _every_  pair of shoes I saw. I bought five pairs, Sheldon. Stop overreacting."

"Yes, well, who even needs five new pairs of shoes?"

"And who the heck even needs Luke Skywalker sheets?"

…

Sheldon huffed in indignation; it was just like Penny to somehow find a way to make it about him. He should have just settled with the Java the Hut sheets—he still had ten other Star Wars themed sheets. Had he done so, he would be back at home doing something productive instead of having to put up with all this  _shopping_. "Remind me again why we are here; other than for my exchange of sheets, of course."

"Formalwear? I thought you had photographic—"

"—eidetic."

"— _eidetic_  memory? Doesn't that mean that you can remember everything? Like which shoe store I told you to remember for me."

Shoes. It was always about shoes. "Yes, it means that I can vividly recall everything—and that store is that Russian shoe store,  _Sobrat_. It means comrade. You wanted the  _Лапушка_  in maroon, white, cyan and lilac." The blonde grinned uo at him appreciatively. "What I meant was; have you forgotten what our main agenda is? We've been here for three hours, twenty-six minutes and three seconds, Penny. All we have are shoes."

Penny paused, glancing over her shoulder at him. "There's a perfectly reasonable explanation for that." She lifted her hand from the stroller's handle and pointed to the store that they were standing in front of. "This is the store! It was on the other side of the place, so I decided that we should save it for last. Ta-dah!"

He eyed the clothes displayed at the window and the blonde's cheerful expression disappeared. "Sheldon, I've brought you to six formalwear stores, now—as you've forgotten—and you've rejected every single one of them. Don't tell me you're going to say no to this one, too!"

"I didn't forget about the fact that you've brought me to six stores, Penny," he grumbled, letting go of Andy's hand so that he could state up at the window. "I merely ignored it and pretended that you even thought of forcing me to go inside those stores. I am merely making sure of the credibility of the stores you plan on buying from. Who knows? They might be plotting against you." He pushed the door open for her, and ushered the twins inside.

Penny gave him an amused smile as they walked inside the store. "Plotting against me? How exactly?"

He looked around the store; based on the clothes up on display, they only sold formalwear. He guessed that it was… alright. It even had a tiny lobby of some sort that seemed to be well kept. "This particular shopping centre—according to the gossip hungry Raj—is one of the 'go to' places to see celebrities. If that is correct, then that means that several celebrities often shop here. And—if you are following my trail of thought—that means that there are several paparazzi lurking somewhere, waiting to strike. How are we so sure that these people haven't made an agreement to tip said people off whenever a celebrity like William Shatner comes in?"

A hand quickly shot up to Penny's mouth as she tried to hide her laughter, causing Sheldon to scowl. What was so funny about possibly privacy threats?! So much for attempting to care. "You're not taking me seriously, are you?"

Her face shifted from amused to trying-her-best-not-to-laugh and he sighed. "Fine, but don't get mad when I say I told you so. That last paparazzi fellow we encountered during lunch nearly destroyed my messenger bag. I'd blow his mind if I could."

"Aww, don't get all pouty, again, I just found it cute how you're all on defense mode! And I promise that the next time that a photog gets to ya' I'll hogtie 'em and make 'em sleep with the fishes." She gave him a stern face and cracked her knuckles. "I'll be all Mafia and stuff."

"Charming," he said (not understanding the reference) and turned to see one of the store employees—who took  _this_  long to notice that they were in the store—staring in awe at Penny. "This is what I'm talking about. Plots."

The man gaped as she stared at Penny, her hand trembling slightly as she reached out to her. "Y—you're…"

"Hi," the blonde greeted, extending her hand out to her, "I'm Penny and this is Sheldon, and we're looking for—"

"YOU'RE PENNY FROM HALFWAY THERE! OH MY GOD!" The employee squeaked, jumping up and down while shaking the (astonished) Penny's hand.

Sheldon felt a tug on his windbreaker and looked down to see Andy with a confused look on his face. "Daddy, why da wady jumpin?"

"She happy and she know it?" Maddie asked, tilting her head to the side as she observed the scene; the rest of the employees appearing from wherever they were hiding (plotting) and crowding around Penny.

"No. It seems to me that they're big fans of your mother," he explained—not that he was sure that they'd understand, but it was better to ease them into the concept of their mother's popularity from an early age—to them as Penny posed to take a picture with them. "Like you to those inane puppets you like."

Andy's eyes widened in comprehension once he realized what he meant. "Wike Andy a fan of da Cokie Monstah and Maddie a fan of Dat Badah?"

"Yes… something like that," he said, oddly surprised that the toddler had grasped the concept. His progeny really were as smart as he expected them to be. "I'm quite shocked that you got that." He gave his son a pat on the head as Penny and the employee (fanatic) approached them.

"Guys, this is Leanne and she's gonna assist us today," the blonde said, gesturing to the elated girl. "I—I'm Leanne, and I'm a part of her fan club!" The girl swooned in admiration then shook her head—probably to compose herself—and turned back to them, finally looking professional. "Before anything else, I'd just like to say that I scurry to the tv whenever they mention your name, Miss Penny, and I'm glad to finally meet you in person, Dr. Cooper! You're taller than you look!" She actually called him Doctor. "So, how may I help you?"

Penny clapped her hands together before moving beside him. "We're actually looking for a tuxedo for our son and a nice matching dress for our daughter for our friend's wedding."

"Is there a theme?" She asked, grabbing a catalogue from a coffee table.

They both shook their head,

The employ— _Leanne_ , nodded then motioned for them to follow her. "Alright then. You're in luck, our head designer just released a new line of formalwear—not that we make anything else—and I have just the clothes for your little angels! Who, by the way, are so much cuter in person!"

"Thanks! I take all the credit," Penny chortled, happy with whatever she meant by her statement. He'd take offense, but he honestly did not care enough to. All he wanted was to wrap this up (as quickly as possible) and get back home to give Leonard a well deserved strike for not taking him to Pottery Barn.

He stopped in his tracks when he felt a rather rough yank at his pants and turned to see Andy frozen behind them; eyes wide in fear. "Is there a problem, Andy?"

Andy sniffled. He was about to  _cry_.

"Andy afwaid of dat," Maddie said, pointing to what her twin brother was staring at.

A mannequin.

"You're afraid of mannequins?" The toddler nodded. "Well, if if makes you feel better," he gently took the toddler's hand and guided him to the second room, Maddie toddling behind them, "they terrify the bajesus out of me, too. Especially after Raj forced us to watch that ridiculous movie of the same name last year. But once you remember that they're easy to destroy in case of an apocalyptic emergency, it's not as frightening. Unless they sing. That's never a good sign."

They reached the other side of the (surprisingly large) store that was full of dresses where Penny and Leanne were looking at a rack full of children sized dresses. "That dress is perfect!" Penny whirled around, a wide grin plastered on her face as she pointed to the white dress. "What do you think?"

Sheldon resisted the strong urge to scoff and instead walked over, eying the dress. He would never understand Penny's love for paying a lot of money for monochromatic clothes. A big portion of her closet (which was now organized, thanks to him) mainly consisted of monochromatic clothing that could probably a whole new rare comic book collection. "I suppose it's appropriate. Based on what you and Amy will be wearing, it will—as you say—fit right in."

Penny was about to say something, but stopped when another (monochromatic—Sheldon, noted) dress caught her eye. "Wait—does that come in my daughter's size?"

Leanne eagerly nodded, pulling out another catalogue and showing it to the blonde. "Yes, it does! We also have the same design in your size for our mommy and baby collection!"

"An entire collection of mommy and baby clothes?!"

The smooth talking employee handed her another catalogue in response.

From the way that Penny's eyes twinkled, Sheldon knew that they were going to be in the store for a  _long_  time. She had that dazzled expression that just screamed 'I'm going to buy every single item on that catalogue' to him. Even the twins seemed to have noticed their mother's sudden enthusiasm—which, gave him the notion that they did not enjoy shopping as much as their mother did—with the way they were slowly backing away. That was one thing the three of them had in common, he guessed.

"Sheldon, why don't you go find a tuxedo for Andy while I look through all of these fabulous mother-daughter dresses?" She suggested (commanded) with a distracted smile that he found to be a bit… creepy.

He inwardly shuddered at a random thought of Penny as a serial killer and grabbed Andy's hand. He would rather waste time looking at clothes that all looked the same than Penny forcing him to choose between clothes that all looked the same. There really wasn't much of a difference, he just did not want to 'get in the way' of Penny's shopping daze. "Fine, but you should know that by leaving me in charge of this, I will not be required to ask for your opinion on what I shall choose."

"On second thought," Penny chirped, her eyes glued onto the catalogue and holding Maddie by her hand, "pick two, then we'll choose from that."

I knew it, he thought as he and Andy walked to the next room which was filled with various (same looking) suits and wedding downs. All this 'shopping' was starting to give him a migraine. It was a good thing that Howard had gotten them matching tuxedos beforehand for the little 'number' he had persuaded them to partake in during the reception. If only the twins had already stayed with them when they got their clothes—then the clothing dilemma would have already been over and done with.

Sheldon let go of his son's hand and walked up to a display of children's suits. Black. Black. Black. Dark gray that was also considered as black indoors. Black. White. Off-white. Blindingly white white. Impossible. This was absolutely impossible! Everything looked the same! Aside from the color and the occasional tie or bow tie preference, they barely had a noticeable difference. Maybe, he should've just let Penny do this. That is, if she actually asked if he wanted to join them in shopping.

"Andy, what do you think of this one?" He asked, reaching out to touch the only suit that actually had a different design; its lapel was than thinner the others. He looked down, wondering why Andy hadn't responded—and for one brief moment, he grew alarmed. Had he not caught sight of the toddler's bright blue shirt about six feet away from, he might have gone into distress mode. Might have.

Andy was standing in front of a display of wedding gowns; the headless mannequin

towering above him being completely ignored as he stared up. His gaze was fixed on a white wedding dress—that looked like it belonged in one of those wedding magazines that Bernadette used as reference for her wedding—that was on the main display. It would obviously be for the bride, and but he guessed that his son didn't understand that concept, yet.

He frowned as he pulled his hand away from the suit he had been examining and walked towards his son before lifting him up. He looked into his little boy's eyes, and saw that Andy looked even more curious than he usually was, right now. His green eyes were wide, mouth agape as he stared up at the dress with wonder.

"Dat Mommy's?" The toddler asked, pointing to the dress.

How exactly would a two year old know what a wedding dress was for— _Raj_. Or Amy. Or Bernadette. But, most definitely Raj. The other day, when he and Leonard had to meet with their former building manager to sign a few documents and Penny was out for some press event, they had enlisted (the more than happy to help) Raj to babysit. Bernadette and Amy were also there for some reason. Based on the disc in the DVD player, they watched '27 Dresses' and 'Runaway Bride.' Which probably meant that the twins watched along with them, and Raj did a running commentary about weddings while Bernadette addressed her cold feet.

He really needed to have a chat with his friends about what they allow the twins to watch.

Before he could reply, Penny trotted into the room holding  _another_  catalogue in one hand and Maddie on her hip. "Sheldon, look! They have a complete family collec—" she stopped beside them, turning to see what they were looking at. "Ooh! That's gorgeous! Why are you two staring at this gorgeous dress?"

Andy tapped his mother's arm—getting her attention—and pointed again; his eyes bright as he smiled up at her. "Mommy's dwess?"

Sheldon watched as Penny's previous cheerfulness fell and started to look like a fish out of water with the way her mouth continuously closed and opened. She continued the odd act for another ten seconds before her gaze—both questioning and menacing, thinking that he set her up for this, at the same time—fell on him.

He didn't have any clue as to how he was going to tell the toddler that no, his mother was not getting married. The dress is not for her, no matter how excited you look for her to try it on. And if Raj (or Howard, based on his recent actions) somehow manipulated him into thinking that  _he_  was going to marry Penny, then he would force Penny to deal with that—as he was doing, now—as it was her confounded idea that they go here in the first place.

"Uh, sweetie," Andy's face fell at the tone of her voice, "no, it's not mine, I'm sorry. But, Auntie Bernie's gonna be wearing one!" She grinned at the toddler who looked upset and she sighed. "I'm really sorry, sweetie, but it's not for me." Her gaze shifted to him—no longer as menacing as it previously was—and she sent him a sad smile as she ignored the way Andy sulked. "So… did you find something?"

Sheldon silently nodded in response, stepping back and walking over to the display.

It  _was_  an aesthetically pleasing dress.

* * *

"I must admit, I am pretty excited to attend this wedding. It might even be the best wedding I've ever been to."

Leonard raised an eyebrow as he glanced at Amy, "best wedding you've been to? What about the one you and Sheldon went to last March?"

Amy adjusted the tiara that Sheldon gave her—as an apology for accidentally ruining her worm experiment by giving them the nicotine that was for her monkeys—on top of her head. "They were sensational, but Sheldon was absolutely embarrassing the entire time. He kept on complaining about how he much he hated weddings and how they weren't doing anything right. Besides, this wedding is extra special because I get to attend with the radiant, alabaster-skinned, drop dead gorgeous Penny. I am just dying to see how breath taking she will look in her maid of honor gown!"

The experimental physicist took a deep breath as the brunette continued adjusting the tiara. "Yeah… I'm sure she'll look really nice." He sent her a smile through the mirror she was standing in front of and sat back down on the couch; allowing the awkward silence to fill the room. He wasn't sure what was making him uncomfortable; the somewhat eerie silence that was caused by the enormous size of the house, or by the fact that he and Amy had nothing to talk about, despite being friends for two whole years.

"If you haven't noticed, this is the first time we've ever actually been alone together," she commented, making her way back to the perpendicular couch.

Gee, I wonder why, Leonard thought, fixing his cuff links. "Yeah, I guess you're right. So, how's your research doing?"

Amy tilted her head slightly to the side and hummed, "it's doing fine. The monkeys have finally been returned to me—as long as I don't get caught flinging their feces back at them." He cringed. "And how about yours?"

"It's alright, nothing too impressive, but I'm getting good results." He smiled and she smiled back.

… Well, so much for that.

"It has also come to my attention that you didn't bring a date. Why is that?"

As much as he'd love to avoid uncomfortable questions like that, it was better than uncomfortable silence. Or not. Amy was actually quite the conversationalist—who'da thought. "Uh, well, there were a limited number of plus ones allowed with Howard's entire family attending, and Mrs. Wolowitz inviting her water aerobics class." Amy's interested stare told him to continue. "And I guess it just wasn't too serious enough for something like this. How about you? You hiding your date inside your purse?"

Amy's face hardened slightly—his words obviously misconstrued—before pursing her lips. "Leonard, we are scientists, we both know that that is impossible. Also, if I had brought a date, I wouldn't be able to ride with Penny!"

"Actually, I think we could all fit in Penny's car," he explained, visualizing said car in his mind, "there's seats at the back that can be folded when uneed—"

She slowly turned to face him and he knew that if looks could kill, he'd be dead. "I'm shutting up, now." He raised his hands up in defense as a disgruntled looking Sheldon trotted down the stairs with a toddler on each arm. "Oh hey Sheldon, what took you guys so long?"

Sheldon huffed, placing the scowling toddlers on their feet before smoothing down his suit. "Maddie, here, is cranking due to Penny waking her up an hour earlier than usual—makeup or something—and Andy is grumpy due to Maddie unleashing her crankiness on his bow tie."

"Cranky, huh?" Leonard asked Maddie who looked cute in her white dress; despite the misplaced murderous scowl—that was a mix of Sheldon's 'I'm going to obliterate you' and Penny's 'Junior Rodeo time' expressions—on her angelic face. "You really are your mother's daughter—that's the exact face she had when Sheldon hung her clothes up on a telephone wire."

Andy crossed his arms and turned away from his twin, "Andy mad at Maddie! Maddie des-twoy da tie!"

Maddie sniffed, "Maddie no do. Maddie not sowwy."

"Maddie 'spose to be sowwy!"

"Nuh uh. Maddie not sowwy."

Leonard sprang to his feet and got in between the bickering siblings. "Okay, let's not fight—today's a great day, we shouldn't fight or be mad at each other."

"Hmph!"

"Hnh!"

"How could Maddie have destroyed Andy's bow tie?" Amy asked, eying the toddler.

Sheldon rubbed his temples, frazzled at the toddlers' constant bickering over nothing. He was close to having a migraine at being given the task of instructing the twins what they had to do. Not only was Maddie ignoring him (he blamed Penny's genes) but she was also defusing her crankiness on her brother who seemed to be too attached (this was probably from his genes) to the black bow tie.

Regardless of how many times he tried to demonstrate what they had to do—Andy simply walking down with the rings and Maddie scattering flowers—nothing seemed to sink in. Which was actually erroneous as 'it' sinking in meant that they had listened, and they did not. All they did was argue as he tried to dress them up, blatantly disregarding him the entire time. He strongly regretted telling Penny that he could handle this—as he certainly  _could not._

"Shocking as it is, not even science could give me a logical explanation as to how a two year old managed to destroy a durable tie. I have a hypothesis that this is what Penny calls as 'Junior Rodeo' but it is a mere hypothesis that might never be proven." He let out a deep breath and glanced up the stairs at the sound of Penny's door closing. "It's a mystery, as they say."

"Are you guys ready to go?" Penny asked as she descended the stairs; her hands working on her left earring.

Sheldon felt his breath hitch in his throat while Leonard stood in awe, Amy rushing towards her. "Bestie! You look…" the neuroscientist blinked, staring at Penny's dress—which was actually the same as Amy's, except for the fact that it was of a lighter shade—and gestured to her entire body. "Spectacular! Breathtaking! Beautiful—no, gorgeous! Exquisite! Magnificent! Ravishing! Splendiferous! Pulchritudinous! I'd use all of the adjectives I know, but that would take all day!"

He guessed that all those adjectives weren't inappropriate.

Penny grinned, noticing how the two physicists gawked at her. "Thanks Amy, you look amazing, yourself." She walked over to Sheldon and poked his chest, "I know we're running late, but, why are you wearing your Flash shirt under your suit? D'you even notice that you left a button undone?"

The theoretical glanced down at the spot that Penny's finger was jabbing and saw that he forgot a button; exposing the bright red shirt he had underneath. He must've forgotten about it while he was dressing the twins and himself. He absolutely could not wait for this day to be over already. "It's for a number that Howard forced us to participate in—and for pictures, I suppose. Howard wants the four of us to have a picture of us looking like superheroes at a wedding."

He swatted Penny's hand away and buttoned his shirt, "we were supposed to be the Avengers—as Howard believes that he and Tony Start have a lot in common—but opted not to as only Captain America and Iron Man have logos. So, we went back to being the Justice League."

Leonard nodded in agreement, undoing a button and showing his Green Lantern shirt. "Most people probably wouldn't know that we were the Avengers if we only went by the color or the costume, and it's always fun to be the incomplete Justice League. It's actually pretty cool once you think about it, and fun for the number at the reception."

"There is nothing fun about the number or the reception, Leonard," Sheldon hissed, lifting Andy and propping him on top the table before putting on the spare tie he had. "Or weddings. They're all tedious and unnecessary." He placed Andy back down on the ground and checked his watch; they were going to be late.

Amy lightly hit Sheldon on the arm, causing him to scowl. "Oh, don't be such a party pooper, Sheldon. This is going to be a wonderful wedding! Speaking of wonderful," she spun around to face Penny, "I don't understand how you are dateless despise the fact that you're the living embodiment of Aphrodite! Must I find you one before we leave?"

Penny chuckled and shook her head. "No, it's alright. I already have two dates," she placed one hand on too of Maddie's head and the other on Andy's, "the twins! And who needs a date when you can have a fun day with your closest friends?"

The brunette snorted, grabbing her purse and walking towards the door, "that's what all the dateless people say, bestie. Yet, another beauty wasted."

Leonard and Penny shared an amused look while Sheldon snarled impatiently, "keep this up and we'll be late." He pointed to his watch then to the door, "if that happens, you'll all understand why I would've been a perfect Hulk."

* * *

Penny grinned once she, Sheldon and the twins entered the venue. "I told you we aren't late!" She took a seat on a chair near the entrance, motioning for the three to follow after her. "I think we're actually a bit early."

"Yes, but we could have been earlier," Sheldon grumbled as he sat the twins on a chair and adjusted the already messy appearance. State of the art car seats were not enough for their fighting to continue, thus leading to a messy tantrum where the twins somehow managed to ruin their clothing. Infants. "Penny, will you pleas talk to them?"

Maddie huffed, wrinkling her nose at her twin, "no talk ta Andy. Maddie mad."

Andy scooted towards Penny and—the two parents weren't sure if it was the right word to describe it—scoffed. "Andy mad, too! Maddie mean."

The older blonde extended her arm out to Maddie and gently pulled her next to Andy, "you two shouldn't fight, okay? Especially not here at these pretty wedding." The siblings exchanged a look of annoyance before shaking in each other's hands—something Leonard must have taught them to do whenever they were forced to reconcile. "There! You should really avoid fighting, okay? I don't want you guys frowning during the march. Now, you two make up and take a time out."

Yes, as if that would make the twins stop fighting, Sheldon thought, taking a seat beside Maddie. "I highly doubt that they'll be the only ones frowning during this wedding. I've always disliked weddings."

"What?" She gasped, eyes wide as she turned to face him. "Why? Weddings are so amazing, and emotional and magical—haven't you gone to a wedding before?"

He nodded and glanced at his watch; ten minutes before the wedding actually starts. "Of course, I have. I've been to several weddings of my colleagues—this one included—to my relatives' weddings and most notably, Junior's wedding which was just an excruciating as this one." He could still remember how the women in his family cried and how his brother forced him to make a speech—he was supposedly  _obligated_  to be the best man—and Junior editing out all of the  _truthful_  remarks he had about his brother. What a disaster.

"Not all weddings are like that—my sister's wedding was beautiful and I cried the entire time!" He snorted in derision. "Besiiides, this is the wedding of two of your closest friends-slash-treasured acquaintance. Aren't you even a little bit happy?"

He turned to face her, one eyebrow raised. "What makes you think that I'm not happy for them?"

Penny opened her mouth to respond, but was cut off by Raj rushing towards them. "Hey, Raj. You look anxious."

The astrophysicist gave her a meek smile, "hi, Penny, Sheldon, and yes, I am as anxious as I look. I was with Bernadette and Mrs. Wolowitz was there and she just wouldn't stop crying."

"Do you guys need me?" asked Penny, preparing to stand, "I asked Amy to go in for me while the twins are still cranky—but, they're all better, now."

Raj politely shook his head, "no, Mrs. Wolowitz ordered everyone to get out while she cries on Bernadette's shoulder. I'm about to check on Howard, but I promise to call on you when the march is about to start."

"Thanks! I'd love to be there and whole heartedly play my part as the doting maid of honor, but it would be cruel of me to just leave Sheldon with the twins ready to lock each other in a closet." She nodded her heads towards the two toddlers that had small frowns on their faces. "They still need some time to cool down."

Raj waved his hand dismissively and shot a furtive glance at his silent colleague, who was staring at something in the opposite direction. "It's alright, it's not like Mrs. Wolowitz is going to let you in, anyway. Well, I'm off, I'll just call you when we're all ready to start this." He sent her another smile before scurrying out of the venue and Penny briefly wondered if he had a drink before talking to her.

"Penny," Sheldon called, gently tapping her shoulder to get her attention, "correct me if I'm wrong—and that rarely happens, but I just want to make sure—but, is that Bailey standing near the second entrance?"

The blonde turned to where Sheldon was pointing to and said guest met her gaze before marching towards them. "Yep, that's Bailey, alright. Kinda shocking to see her in something that isn't black." She quickly got on her feet and hugged her frowning—Sheldon was right about the twins not being the only ones who would be frowning during this wedding—friend. "Hey Bailes! Glad you could make it."

"A promise  _is_  a promise," Bailey replied monotonously, obviously unhappy with her having to attend the wedding. "Oh look, it's the unhappy one. Here to spread the gloom?"

Sheldon stood from his seat and crossed his arms, "I believe that's my line. What are  _you_  doing here?"

Bailey clucked her tongue at him while Penny found the scene somewhat similar to two Godzillas fighting. Two giant, terrorizing beings that could cause destruction if they wanted to. "I was invited, got a problem with that?"

"Penny, why is  _she_  here?" Sheldon snarled, turning to her then pointing to the sneering actress. "Make her go away!"

Penny glanced over her shoulder to check on the twins—who were still in time out mode—and shrugged. "She's here cause she's Bernadette's and my friend." Sheldon's jaw dropped in disbelief. "Bailey used to work at the Cheesecake Factory before she became a model turned actress."

"If she worked there, why is it that I've never seen her before?!"

"Bailey's shifts were always at the times that you didn't go to the restaurant, and she normally wasn't on waitress duty. She might have even made your food once while I was busy. But, she left a little after I moved in, so you never really got to see her. Pretty cool how we're working together, again, actually," Penny admitted with a small smile that Bailey returned while Sheldon simply stared at her, dumbstruck. "Oh hey, Bailey, why isn't Gregg here? I thought that you were going to bring him as your date?"

The actress smirked, amused at something she was thinking of. "I didn't want him to make him think that we were friends. Bring him as a date once, and he thinks that we're all buddy buddy." The two actresses shared a small laugh (probably an inside joke) that Sheldon did not understand. "Plus, Sparkly said something about some execs wanting him to play some guy named Jamie Madrox in some superhero movie or something. He even told me that they wanted me to be some Jessica Drew person, but I said; no way."

Sheldon furrowed his eyebrows as he comprehended what she said and gasped. "They want Gregg to play Multiple Man in a film? Are they making a standalone X-Factor movie or is this for another X-Men tie in—but, of they want you to be Jessica Drew that would mean an Avengers movie—in which Wolverine is a member but that would be a problem as Marvel Studios does not own Wolverine—or a Spiderman movie… Or is it an adaptation of the Avengers vs. X-Men series?!" Bailey jumped at the enthusiasm he had for the topic. "I guess that Gregg would be okay, but it would be more appropriate for him to be Hank Pym or as Sentry—but you! You do look like Jessica Drew aka Spiderwoman! Hydra double agent one, of course."

Bailey stared at him with wide eyes. "Penny, get him a hobby."

"That  _is_  his hobby," replied Penny who had not a single ounce of sarcasm in her tone.

The actress cringed. "Well, get him a new hobby." She eyed Sheldon's eager expression and shuddered. "Quickly."

"Hey, I just checked in with Howard," Leonard told them once he approached them, "and he's really nervous."

Bailey whistled while taking a step away from the still-waiting-for-an-answer looking man. "This has nothing to do with me, so, I'm just gonna disappear." She slowly backed away before getting past the entrance and disappearing at a corner.

Leonard raised an eyebrow then continued, "anyway, he got really nervous and even thought of running out. Then, Raj talked to him and now, he and Howard are having a moment."

This time, it was Penny's turn to cringe. "This better not be what I think it is, or else I'll need a lobotmoy—"

"— _lobotomy_ —"

"—lobotomy or else I'll never get back my sanity!"

"No, it's not. Raj is just crying while Howard is practicing his vows," Leonard said, causing Penny to sigh with relief. "Nothing too big, considering the fact that Mrs. Wolowitz is crying along with him."

Penny crossed her arms and hummed in thought. "Great! You know it's actually hard to believe that Howard—the former sleaziest man I've  _ever_  met—is finally settling down with a great girl. But, I'm really happy that he finally found the one who made him change his ways—like how it happens in every romance story. Seriously, ever single one."

Leonard chuckled, "yeah, everything is just changing so quickly that everything that we thought wouldn't happen is finally happening! We're so much different from when we all first met… time flies by so quickly, doesn't it? We're all changing without even noticing it. Who knows? Maybe tomorrow Raj loses his selective mutism, I get married and Sheldon actually refrains from spraying Lysol on everything."

"Or maybe  _I_  get married, you grow another four inches and Sheldon, here, stops being such a party pooper?" She teased, earning a grin from Leonard and a frown from Sheldon. "Anything can happen, right?"

Sheldon ignored the secretive smile that Penny had and returned to his seat next to the twins who were still suffering through their rather amazing self-imposed time out. Something about today was just irking him more than any other day unreasonably irked him before. He just couldn't put his finger on it, but there was… something unrecognized that was swirling around his head, commanding that he do something about it after it got triggered by this wedding.

"Guys, let's get in position," Raj said breathlessly, panting as he reached them. "it's time!"

Penny nudged him to stand before hoisting Maddie to her hip, "come on, Sheldon, time to go." He gazed at her extra cheerful demeanor and inwardly hissed.

The wedding hadn't even started, but he already had a migraine.

* * *

"I've said this many times before, you're aiming at the wrong direction! And shouldn't you be with Bernadette at the back of the line?"

"My babies are going to have their own spotlights—do you honestly think that I'd miss that?"

"That's exactly why I'm going out of my way to record it for you! Why must you be so difficult, Penny?"

"I'm not being difficult—hey! Give that back!"

Howard sucked in through his teeth and whirled to face the bickering non-couple. "Will the two of you please cut it out? I'm already nervous enough—all this fighting won't make me feel any better!"

"Oh, Howard, don't get too mad at them," his mother wailed, wiping at her almost ruined mascara, "they're just swayed by the emotion!"

As if he wasn't stressed enough already. This was his wedding day for god's sake—why was everyone more emotional than him? On one side was Raj and his mom, crying like there was no tomorrow; on the other side was Bernadette's dad staring him down while Sheldon and Penny argued on something stupid. Wasn't this supposed to be the best day of his life?

Sheldon snatched the camera from the blonde and lifted it over his head, "tell that to her. I've been trying to be a gentleman by recording the march for her, but she won't allow me to! Especially, when she can't even see that she doesn't have the right angle."

Penny glared up at him, "the right angle?! I'm always in front of a camera, I know  _what_  the right angle is, Sheldon!"

"Penny, I have an IQ of 187, I know everything there is to know about everything."

"Oh yeah, what's Radiohead?"

"It is 2012, Penny, that question is getting old. And they're a band."

"Can you name one of their songs?"

"I am only required to know who they are, not be a fan, Penny."

"Alright, alright! I've had enough of this," a familiar (snarky) voice hissed, marching towards the bickering parents and stepping in between them. "I could hear your voices all the way from where I was sitting. I'm gonna film them, alright?"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow at Penny then turned to scowl at Bailey, "as much as I'd prefer to tell you that you're not making sense, that was actually very logical." He handed her the camera, and bent her arms in a seventy degree angle. "This is the right way to go. Do it right, or we're redoing this whole wedding." Howard scoffed. "Or just the march."

Bailey rolled her eyes, waving her hand in dismissal before walking back to her seat up front. Thank goodness for her or else he would have murdered Sheldon and Penny on his wedding night. "She might actually be a deity of some sort. If those came in all black clothing." He chuckled—Penny smirking up at the frowning Sheldon—and found Raj scurrying towards them. "Raj, are we ready?"

Raj nodded, holding back his tears. "Yeah, dude. Time to shine."

This was it. He was getting married. Woah—who would've thought that he'd ever get married? He certainly didn't. Nobody did. But, it was happening and he was about to get married to the greatest woman he'd ever met. "Alright, then, everyone get into places!"

And before he knew it, he was standing in front beside Raj—and because Bernadette said that this was for  _all_  of them—Sheldon and Leonard. Raj was still his best man, but Bernadette kept going on and on and on about how Sheldon and Leonard had a role in them 'finding' each other and that they deserved to stand beside him.

Bernadette's explanation; if Leonard never became Sheldon's roommate, he wouldn't have met Penny, whom he wouldn't have to pine after in the Arctic—and ruined Sheldon's experiment—where he got the snowflake which got them together, and would've never introduced him to her. That was why the two roommates (were they still considered as roommates?) were currently standing next to him; their shirts unbuttoned to reveal their Justice League logos—that took him two whole hours to convince Bernadette to agree to.

"Nervous?" Leonard asked with a small smile.

Howard nodded, turning to see Andy carrying the rings and starting his walk. "Extremely. I'm already done ignoring ma's wailing in the background, but everything's just so surreal. I mean who'd expect me of all people to—" he turned as Andy  _tripped_  halfway, causing everyone to gasp, and Sheldon (and Penny) to run towards the sniffling toddler. "Hey, he really is his son."

"Are you alright, sweetie?!"

"Are you hurt?!"

"Even the baby is gettin' emotional!"

"Ma' he's not crying because of the wedding!" Howard sniped, glaring at his still blubbering mother, "he's crying because he tripped!"

"Well excuse me! How d'ya expect me to see anything with this seat you gave me!"

Sheldon propped his son to his feet as Penny doted over the crying toddler, "you aren't helping, Penny,"

The blonde growled at him, checking if Andy was hurt, "I just wanna see if he's okay! Are okay, sweetie?"

Andy nodded, wiping his tears on his sleeves and picking up the pillow with the rings. "Andy okay. Andy not huwt much. Pwomise!"

"Okay, just watch your step, okay?" Penny smoothed his hair back before sending Sheldon a  _look_  and trotting back to the back where Bernadette was. Sheldon sighed, patting his son's head and returned to stand next to Howard; Andy continuing his walk without tripping, again.

Once Andy reached the front, Maddie appeared, scowling slightly as she grabbed a handful of flowers and tossed it around. Then she paused, proceeded to pick the petals up, then tossed them around again.

Howard saw Bailey hand the camera to the person next to her and bent down to whisper something to Maddie who mouthed 'oh' before resuming her walk, but this time, without the process of picking the petals back up. Everyone except Sheldon chuckled at that.

Then the music changed, and Penny appeared—he tried not to stare at her too much, cause she was still the cheesecake goddess actress he knew and he was about to get married—followed by a blur of white.

And his world stopped. Because he knew that he was the luckiest man on Earth for getting Bernadette. He didn't even notice how Bernadette's dad was blubbering beside her—a sight he would have  _killed_  to see, had he not been compoletely enthralled by his bride. Everything was just too (unbelievably) romantic and perfect—even with the Cooper twins' little mishaps—and it was hard not to get swayed by all the (as Raj previously mentioned) love in the air.

There  _was_  one other thing he noticed before Bernadette appeared, though, and that was Sheldon staring at Penny. It seemed that he wasn't the only swayed by the romantic aura that his wedding brought—even if he didn't realize it, yet.

At least  _he_  did.

* * *

When Raj first explained to Andy and Maddie what a wedding was, the two toddlers were amazed at how magical weddings were. He said that there would be; pretty dresses, wonderful acting (crying), music, dancing, happiness and lots and lots of cake. A  _lot_  of cake. And even more crying.

Penny didn't expect that the astrophysicist would be absolutely right about the crying part.

"—and I can still remember how he always make me burp him right after he eats! It's always been just me and my little star, and now there's Bernie, too! I just can't grasp the fact that my baby boy's all grown up and married! I can still feel the joy I felt when I first held him!" Mrs. Wolowitz sniffled into the mic, causing majority of the guests to cringe. "Look at him! He's finally a man! You grew up too fast!"

Howard walked over to his mother and snatched the microphone form her hands, "ma, why are you making a speech? We're just cutting the cake." He gestured to Bernadette who was standing next to the three tier cake. "We're already sone with the speeches, ma."

"Cake makes me emotional! You got a problem with that?" The (first) Mrs. Wolowitz snarled, "my baby boy just got married to the finest gal he's ever dated and you expect me  _not_  to get emotional? I have every right to be emotional!"

"Uncah Waj's wight," Andy chirped as Penny placed a slice of cake in front of him, "wedins fun!"

Bailey smirked, scooping her ice cream from her bowl and placing it on top of her piece of cake. "Really? What makes you say that, baby blondie number one?"

Andy swallowed the cake in his mouth and grinned up at his auntie, "cause we gots wotsa cake and ice cweam! And Uncah Howad and Auntie Behnadette's fun to watch!"

"Ah, so even toddlers enjoy weddings, didn't think that was possible," the dark haired actress remarked, adding another spoonful of ice cream on her cake. "How about you, baby blondie number two? You having fun?"

Maddie paused in chewing and slowly took another forkful of cake—which Bailey noted was a very Penny thing to do—before replying. "Maddie wike wedins wike Andy. It fun!" She took a sip of water from her sippy cup and looked up at their mother. "Mommy, when mommy gonna mawwy daddy?"

Penny nearly choked on her mouthful of cake, coughing wildly as Bailey handed her a glass of water. This was even more uncomfortable than the toast where Mrs. Wolowitz wouldn't stop crying and Raj kept interrupting everyone just to say that he was happy for his best friend. And when Mrs. Wolowitz grabbed the mic from the Rostenkowskis and forced her to say something about how none of them saw this day coming. "Uh, you know, sweetie, it'll be a surprise!" The two toddlers eyes lit up right as Sheldon returned from the buffet. "Just don't tell him, okay?"

"They ran out of ice cream," Leonard informed them as he, Sheldon and Amy returned to their seats. "Sheldon argued with everyone about it."

Sheldon hissed, glaring at the single scoop of chocolate ice cream in his bowl. "This is a wedding with a lot of guests—how could they have not considered the fact that a lot of people would keep coming back to the sundae bar? It's just preposterous and it certainly ruined my night."

Amy raised an eyebrow and eyed the almost gone mini cakes. "Can't you just have cake? They're really good and there's still some for you to have."

"Amy, it took me fifteen letters to make Howard agree on putting a make your own sundae bar." Sheldon pointed out, clearly affronted at the idea of having cake, "I want a sundae with nuts, gummy bears, a pinch of sprinkles—no more than seven pieces—and a drizzle of hot fudge. Cake is  _nothing_  compared to that."

Bailey snorted, "you've had three bowls of ice cream. Let it go."

"That's three less than the required number of sundaes to make me happy!"

"Crazy," she muttered, shaking her head in disbelief, "absolutely crazy."

"I'm not crazy," he snarled, scooping a spoonful of ice cream and scrutinizing it. "My mother had me tested."

Penny watched as he took a bite of ice cream and smiled, "shouldn't you take a break from eating desserts? We have all night to eat some more."

Leonard made a humming noise, "they won't restock anymore."

"Drat. Cue the Sheldon rant," Penny sighed, glancing at Sheldon who was eying the cakes that the twins were eating like yesterday's trash. "I honestly do not understand why all of you are so fond of such tasteless food. Ice cream sundaes are  _so_  much funner than cake!" He huffed and went on to do another one of his rants that no one but the twins listened to.

"Okay everyone, it's time for the first dance!" The host called; the background music changing from a lively song to a slower one. "May we call on Mr. and Mrs. Wolowitz to the dance floor, as well as all of our couples in attendance?" Howard and Bernadette stood from their seats and made their way to the middle of the venue, the rest of the couples following after them as a slow song started.

Maddie tapped Sheldon on the shoulder to get his attention, "daddy, we dance?"

Before Sheldon could decline, Raj appeared behind him. "You know, dancing with your father first means that you're getting married." Sheldon's eyebrow rose and quickly shook his head in disapproval—there was no way that he was going to allow Maddie to marry at that age… or any age at all! "Wonderful, then if you will allow me," the astrophysicist bent down on one knee and extended his hand out to the toddler, "may I have this dance, Maddie?"

Penny nodded at Maddie who grinned down at Raj, "okay, Uncah Waj!" Raj smiled back, lifting her up before walking to the dance floor.

Andy—after finishing his cake—tugged on Leonard's sleeve and pushed his plates towards him. "Uncah Wenad, Andy get cake, pwease?"

Leonard looked at Penny for approval—who nodded, again—before taking the plate and the toddler's hand. "Fine, but you gotta cut down on the cake, okay, buddy?"

Sheldon took one last (protective) glance at Raj and Maddie—he was going to make sure that Maddie wouldn't do anything that would indicate her getting married at an early age—then finished his remaining ice cream. "I have never understood the notion of dancing. What's so fun about it?"

Amy blinked, "have you ever tried dancing at a wedding?"

"Yes, but that was my mother forcing me to dance with her and Missy. Oh, and Meemaw, too, but those are hardly considered to be dancing," he said, drinking a glass of water to wash the ice cream down his throat. "I doubt that I'd ever change my mind about it."

"Then time to change it!" Amy stood from her chair, rounding the table and grabbing Sheldon's arm. "We're going to dance!"

Sheldon jerked his arm away, but Amy quickly pulled it back. "What? No! Amy, I do not—" he was cut off by the brunette (somehow) yanking him to his feet and dragging him to the dance floor.

Penny's gaze lingered on the dancing ridden area for another moment before she turned back to her empty plate of cake. She would've loved to have a dance. Maybe once Andy returned from the buffet—

"—sooo," Bailey's monotonous voice cut in, "about that…"

"About what?" She repeated, confused at Bailey's vague conversation starter.

"What's your answer to the twins' question?"

The twins' question? What questio—oh! That question! Well, it wasn't really the  _twins'_  question, but it was  _Maddie's_ , question. She didn't know that Bailey was actually paying attention. "I dunno. Wait you heard that? I thought you slipped to Mckentopia awhile back. You, just like Sheldon, hate weddings. I actually expected you to leave right after the wedding… I may even owe you an apology for that assumption."

"What? You know me better than that, Penny—I  _love_  weddings!" Bailey sarcastically said, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips. "But really, I hate weddings, but not Bernadette. And it's actually pretty interesting how you won't be able to tune something out if you don't have something good to think about." She shrugged, toying with the candy version of Howard and Bernadette that came with every slice of cake. "With Gregg having the great drama episode of March this year, I had to sharpen my hearing to avoid him crying all over me. Literally. Oh, and it's the United States of Bailey. It was supposed to be the the United kingdom of Bailey, but USB sounds better than UKB. That kinda sounds like a KGB affiliate."

Penny stared at her friend, trying to comprehend everything that she had just old her. Like Sheldon, Bailey had always had a knack for talking a lot without a single pause to breathe. Gregg was right; they really were twins. "Anyway, to answer the question that you seemed to forget about; I don't have an answer. Me and Sheldon are just friends and co-parents. Nothing more."

Bailey loudly scoffed, earning looks from people sitting nearby. "What? Are you even listening to yourself? Did you see how he practically gawked at you at the wedding? He looked like he had just seen the CERN Supercollider in person." She noticed Penny's surprised expression and smirked. "How I know that? Well, I do my research every now and then. Now, it's time for you to react. Go react."

"What do you mean with the way he 'gawked' at me?" The blonde asked, the pitch of her voice rising with both incredulity and refusal. "I don't think he was even looking at me—not that I wanted him to look!—I was busy checking on the twins the entire time."

The dark haired actress scoffed, again. She hated it when people were blind to what was happening around them and stupidly refused to believe her. Or maybe it was because everyone has a different perspective on everything. Gregg once explained to her (during the great drama episode of March) that just because you notice something, it does not necessarily mean that the person beside you sees the same thing. He had a lot of motivational (inspirational) speeches every time he had drama episodes. "I'd love to say that I'm kidding ya', but I'm not. Just a wonderful frien giving advice and leading you to the right direction."

"And what direction should I go, Dr. Mckenzie?"

"I'd prefer to give you advice," Bailey said in a serious voice, "smarty pants likes you, but hasn't realized it, yet. Rather upsetting, but, you can't have it all. I suggest that you stop being in denial when it's already happening. And really, it's not hard to see that Sheldon likes you. You just have to open your eyes a little bit more."

Penny grew silent at Bailey's—unbelievably—serious advice. She didn't know what she was supposed to say to that. Was she supposed to be happy? Or was she supposed to pretend as if the world's snidest person had actually said something  _seriou_ _s_  and helpful (was it considered as helpful?) for the first time in her life?

Leaving the twins with Sheldon was really turning her life into a kind of serendipitous roller coaster ride.

She felt someone tug on her dress and found Andy beaming up at her. "Oh, hey, sweetie. Where's your cake?" She looked around for Leonard. "And your Uncle Leonard?"

"Da cake gone, and Uncah Wenad go to da potty," he replied innocently before reaching for her hand. "Mommy, dance?"

She glanced at Bailey who was gesturing for her to go, an amused smile on her face. "Sure, I'd love to dance!" Andy grinned and led her to the dance floor, finding a spot beside Maddie and Sheldon. "Hey, Sheldon, what happened to Amy and Raj?"

"Amy had to take some sort of rest and Raj received a call from his parents, asking that he put them on video call so that they could greet the happy couple." Sheldon informed, standing rigidly while he twirled Maddie.

Penny watched Sheldon stand like a pole as Maddie happily swayed in front of him. "That's some kind of dance you're doing there, Sheldon. Is it an original?"

The theoretical physicist rolled his eyes, giving Maddie another twirl. "You know very well that I don't dance, Penny. I am just not rejecting a toddler's plea of dancing with them."

"Or maybe you're just a softy for a little version of you?" She joked, nudging his elbow as she danced with Andy. Even if he didn't admit it, she knew that Sheldon had a soft spot for both of the twins. There was just something about how they always get him to do something that he doesn't normally do (i.e. dancing) that made her smile. It was endearing to see the great Dr. Cooper stepping out of his comfort zone to give the twins what they want—

She would rather not get her hopes up.

"Daddy," Maddie called, causing Sheldon to look down at her. "Pwease dance wid Mommy? Maddie and Andy wanna see Mommy and Daddy dance togedah!"

Sheldon and Penny shared a look.

"Sorry, sweetie," Penny started and both of the twins' faces dropped, "your daddy doesn't dance in any of the universes, but the math suggests that he's a clown made out of candy. Isn't that right, Sheldon?" He nodded in agreement.

Maddie scowled, extracting her hand from her father's and pulling it towards Andy who did the same with Penny. Andy grabbed Penny's hand and placed it on Sheldon's. "Dance, pwease?" They said in unison; giving their parents their best 'please, please, please, please' faces.

Sheldon let out a sigh of defeat and glanced down at Penny. "Would you care to dance?" He extended his hand out then retracted it, looking suspiciously at her hand that she was about to place on his. "That is, of course, of you promise that your hand is clean and wasn't in contact with anything that I hadn't been in contact with."

"We've been together throughout the entire day, Sheldon. I highly doubt that I went somewhere that you didn't, seeing that we also live in the same house and arrived here together." Penny reminded him as she reached her hand out to him, a smile forming on her face as she recognized the song playing. "Come dance with me."

Ah, yes, her silly invitation to dance during their encounter in the kitchen during breakfast. Thinking back at it now, that was probably the only time that Penny woke up earlier than any of them. How peculiar. "Alright, then," he took her hand—the twins already dancing happily beside them—and prepared himself for a dance. "As long as you promise that you won't infect me with another sickness of some sort."

Penny laughed lightly as they started to dance, "I promise that I won't infect you with another sickness—that has run its course. But I'll tell you what, if you do get sick, I promise to make you soup and that the twins will sing Soft Kitty in a round for you. How does that sound?"

"I'd prefer to not get sick, but thank you for your offer." He gave her a small appreciative smile and saw Leonard and Raj (foolishly) grinning at him from their table. He barely even noticed the small frown that Amy had as he glanced back at Penny who returned his smile—which, widened in delight as the next song started. "Ooh, I just love Shania Twain. She's amazing. From This Moment is one of my all time favorite songs."

"Shania Twain?"

She nodded happily, humming along with the song, "yeah, she's this famous country sing—"

"I know who she is. Both my Meemaw and Missy are her fans." And it was her song that was playing when you invaded our kitchen and asked me to dance, Sheldon thought, remembering how annoyed he was when the country song woke him up. Affinity for said singer's music was one of the many things that she and Missy had in common. "And you are a fan. I organized your things without your permission, remember?"

Penny tilted her head in thought before finally remembering. "Oh yeah… but back to Shania Twain, I've always loved her music. I actually want  _this_  song in particular to play at my wedding. Listen to the lyrics—it's beautiful."

_You're the reason I believe in love_

_A_ _nd you're the answer to my prayers from up above_

_All we need is just the two of us, my dreams came true because of you._

_From this moment, as long as I live_

_I will love you, I promise you this_

_There is nothing I wouldn't give, from this moment on._

He guessed that the song was okay, with it having lyrics that actually made sense, unlike those other idiotic songs that Penny plays at home. Actually, he was quite familiar with the song as Missy played her songs nonstop whenever he was home; claiming that he needed to know things other than bein' smart. He preferred classical music—such as Pachelbel's Canon in D or Vivaldi's Four Seasons; Spring—but he supposed that the song was more appropriate for a wedding. Or something.

"Well?" Penny asked, still cheerful due to a song that she liked playing. "What do you think of the song?"

"It's a good song and I agree that would be appropriate for a wedding," he admitted and for some reason, he noticed that Penny's eyes lit up whenever he agreed with her on something. He also noticed that he was noticing a lot of things, recently, and that it was making him confused.

He had a strong feeling that this all started with Penny; the enigma that he probably would never understand.

Or maybe…

—He was in  _a lot_  of trouble.

"Penny, have I ever told you that Missy is also a fan of Shania Twain?"

Fact: Mrs. Wolowitz cries  _a lot_.

Fact: So does Raj.

Fact: Catching the bouquet means does not necessarily mean that you're the next one who's going to get married.

Fact: Maddie catching the bouquet does not count.

Fact: Andy  _loves_  cake.

Fact: Penny does not appreciate any of them feeding the twins too much sweets.

Fact: Raj is guilty.

Fact: Dr. Sheldon Cooper hated weddings.

Fact: Hated. Past tense.

Fact: Dr. Sheldon Cooper guessed that weddings weren't as bad as he originally thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3x03 - The Gothowitz Deviation; Penny is dancing to Shania Twain's 'Man! I Feel Like A Woman', which is where I based Penny's being a big fan of her. And with Sheldon being from Texas (I hope that I don't sound stereotypical or something) I just randomly guessed that he'd know who Shania Twain is, either from Missy or some other relative. Plus, 'From This Moment' was palled during my brother's wedding two years, ago, and I thought that it was really appropriate.
> 
> Next up; Anything Can Happen Thursday, Sheldon and Penny style, and a special cameo!


	20. Unexpected Interruptions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anything Can Happen Thursday Sheldon and Penny style.

"If you don't wake up, I will vaporize your bed.'

"I'm awake—I'm just ignoring you."

"Then, stop ignoring me and get up! We're going to be late for work!"

"Sheldon, can't you tell that I'm sick?!"

Infuriating. This man was absolutely infuriating. When would Leonard understand that he could—thanks to Penny infecting him each time—tell if a person was sick by just observing the atmosphere in the room? Well, there was no way to prove that he could—but his sick senses told him that his roommate was sick. That, and the fact that he heard Leonard sneeze from the hall.

"I can. Which is why I have a mask on. If you'd stop being so rude and turn to face me, you'd see the precautionary measures I've taken." He tapped his finger on the fabric of the mask then sprayed a can of Lysol around him. "Now, it's time for you to get up and drive me to work. You don't even have to get dressed."

Leonard turned to his side and glared up at him. "Didn't you walk all the way here to get that thing you forgot, the other day? I didn't hear any complaints from you about that."

It wasn't that he didn't complain, it was just that there was nothing to complain about. Ten o' clock was a nice time to go jogging, or walking. Or speed walking all the way to their house. "The circumstances are different, Leonard. My problem today is not my problem tomorrow. Sometimes. So… get up and get moving."

His roommate didn't budge. "Why don't you get Penny to take you?"

Sheldon's eyes widened at the suggestion before vehemently shaking his head. "No… that is certainly out of the question. Besides, she doesn't have work today and it's before eleven o' clock. No one knocks before eleven o' clock."

"She was awake the other day, why don't you try and ask her?" He grabbed a handful of tissues and loudly blew his nose—either to actually get rid of the mucus or to annoy him.

No, thanks. "Sorry, I'm not taking that… risk," he placed the can of Lysol on Leonard's dresser before eying the duffel bag that was sitting on his desk chair. "Aren't you and Raj going to Las Vegas this afternoon? I know because you invited me. And I declined. Thrice."

Leonard muttered something then sat up, wrapping his comforter around him. "That's why I'm trying to get as much as rest as possible. If another one of us bails on him, he's going to get depressed, again. I'll probably leave while you're at—hey, why are you going to work? The entire physics department is closed due to that gas leak that that chemist caused. That's the reason why we have all these vacation days."

"Even though I am  _ordered_  to not go; my office is on the  _other_ side of the department—it isn't affected by the leak and I have to finish something up." Sheldon pulled out a folder from his bag and handed it to Leonard. "That's an extra copy for safe keeping. It's Anything Can Happen Thursday tomorrow, and who knows, my anything can happen might be me getting poisoned. Don't steal my work but do publish it if I die."

The (sick) physicist stared at the folder then placed it on his nightstand. "Well, good luck with that. I'll bring you back a souvenir—a shirt or something."

Sheldon scoffed, gripping the strap of his bag with one hand and opening the door with the other. "I'd prefer something that doesn't have anything to do with casinos, but whatever floats your boat. I'm off to start my walk, don't catch a disease that I might catch." He waved at his roommate—who waved back—and stepped out into the hallway.

Fine, if he wasn't going to get a ride, then he'd walk. It was still early for any thugs, and he was going to be safe with the numbers of joggers jogging around at this hour. He just hoped that there would be  _something_  that didn't change in his routine. Other than his food and his schedule, everything else had changed. Namely the geography of his new home, and the people living with him. It would be great if the simple routine of driving him to work would be maintained. Homeostasis wasn't someth—

He felt something touch his shoulder and he jumped back, nearly having a heart attack. He placed a hand on top of his heart and spun around to face Penny, who looked like she was about to go jogging. "You frightened me!"

The blonde—who looked  _way_  too cheerful at nine am—raised her hands up in defense and backed up. "I'm sorry, I've been calling your name since I saw you come out of Leonard's room—I thought that you heard me."

"No," he grumbled, still trying to compose himself and his racing heart. He swore that Penny's sudden appearance made his heart palpitate. How annoying. "I was pondering over something quite trivial… why are you awake? It's half past nine."

Penny glanced at the iPod strapped on her arm, "it is, isn't it? Well, since we're on a hiatus, I thought that I'd go back to jogging every morning." She gave him a wide smile as she scanned his appearance, "wait—you don't have to go to work until Monday; why are you going to work?"

"I have to finish something important," he gestured to his bag and checked his watch, "now, if you'll excuse me—"

"Wait," she called, grabbing a hold of his (personal space) elbow, "why don't I join you? I pass by the university during my runs."

Sheldon crossed his arms as Penny gave him her best 'come on, I'm not gonna hogtie and castrate you' look that she often used when she coaxed him to do something that she knew was something he did not like. He had an odd feeling that something… unusual was going to happen but shook it off as he really had to get to the university in one piece. "As long as you don't wipe your sweat on me—like how Wolowitz would—I find no reason why you can't. Besides, having you with me will prevent me from getting into any type of danger."

Penny grinned widely as they made their way down the stairs, "aww, that's sweet of you! I promise not to let any bad man get to ya', sweetie."

"Actually," he started once they exited the house, "what I meant was that you'd be the perfect human shield shall there be any danger lurking ahead. Instead of going for me, they'll surely go straight to you—a recognized actress. You'll be a wonderful diversion, as long as you don't talk about shoes—no, if you talk constantly about shoes, I'm sure that they'll give up their life of crime if it means that they'd be chatted to death."

"I seriously thought that was a compliment," she grumbled, jogging slightly as they made their way out the lot. "I should get lessons on how to differentiate what's good and bad that'll come out of your mouth."

If this banal chit chat continues, he was never going to join her out, again. He had a feeling that this little walk (jog, whatever) wasn't going to be easy. He expected the unnecessary talk about her day to be present, but he seemed to have forgotten the fact that Penny's definition of a conversation usually annoyed him. There was a 92.47 % chance that the topic would somehow be about him or something regarding him.

On the bright side, Penny's gardener was doing a terrific job at keeping the garden up to his standards—regardless of the rows and rows of trees messing everything up with their fallen leaves. Well, it is fall. Oh, and he'd make it a point to check the electronic gate to see if it's working properly. There was no way that he'd ever allow the robbery incident of 2009 to ever happen again. Not with the twins around.

"… not with the twins around?"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow and glanced towards her, "excuse me?"

Penny wasn't even jogging. "You said; not with the twins around."

He was literally speaking his mind! How utterly embarrassing. "Uh, I was just thinking about checking the gate. Don't want another robbery," he explained, pressing a button to get the gate to close. "I hadn't noticed that I was thinking out loud."

"Oh, that happens to me a lot!" She admitted happily. "The other day, I was with Gregg and Bailey when we saw the most horrible outfit I've ever seen and I said 'god, that's hideous' out loud! Thank god, the person didn't hear me!" She shook her head as she laughed then looked up at him, expecting him to laugh, as well. "So! How's work?"

There it was; the conversation was now about him. She should be banned from engaging in banal chit chat. "It's fine. After some asinine chemist blew up the chemist room, a gas leak made its way through the air vents and now the entire physics building is being quarantined while they try to fix the mess. And how is yours?"

"It's alright, I guess," she started stretching as they walked side by side—making him wonder when exactly she'd start jogging—waving at the other joggers who passed them by. "Halfway There is doing really well, and we don't have to shoot scenes for Hindsight until next week. Once the movie's done, I'll be taking a break from movies. It would be nice if I could spend some more time with the twins."

He knew that. The other day, Raj came over claiming that he needed his friends since Howard and Bernadette were still in Hawaii for their honeymoon. Then instead of playing games, he forced them to watch those piddly little drama shows of his and a handful of gossip shows that (coincidentally) had something about Penny. Four different shows talking about Penny's problems and the hosts talking about how much they loved her.

One of them featured an exclusive interview with her where they talked about her so called 'five things that they didn't know about her.' He already knew all of them (with him knowing her from before she was famous) and theorized that Penny wouldn't reveal an actual secret for everyone to know. Like the fact that she was a community college dropout. Her loving yoga pants wasn't really much of a 'juicy' secret, as Raj would say.

Though, the part where the interviewer asked Penny about what else she had in store in her career was particularly interesting. She mentioned exactly what she had just told him; that she was going to take a break from doing movies in order to spend time with the twins. Looking back at the past months, he agreed that Penny filming Hindsight was a hindrance to Penny being with the twins. It was even the sole reason why the twins fell (metaphorically) on his doorstep.

Raj had said that it would be terrible for Penny to take a hiatus from making movies—as a lot of people love her movies—but it wouldn't be bad for her reputation. Personally, he wasn't against it, as the twins often mentioned that they missed their mother. In about a year or so, the twins would be going to school—that was, if Penny agreed to the idea of it—and if they did, that meant that the twins would be a bit busier than usual. Which was probably why Penny always immediately shot the idea down. He could tell that the twins would love to spend time with her and he, himself, agreed that it would be better if she—

"—you're spacing out, again," Penny pointed out, a small frown on her face. "Are you feeling alright?"

Her hand shot out to touch his forehead but he quickly caught her wrist and stopped her from any unnecessary actions. He wasn't sick. "Yes, I'm fine. Like what I said, I'm just thinking about something. It's nothing important, though."

She raised an eyebrow in confusion, ready to ask more but instead chose to change the subject. "Hey, isn't tomorrow Anything Can Happen Thursday? D'you have any plans?"

He hummed in thought, "with Howard away on his unnecessarily long honeymoon and Raj and Howard heading to Las Vegas, I am actually not quite sure." He stopped as they reached the entrance to the university. He'd be turning right while she was going to go straight. "I just might replay the Kingdom Hearts 1 and 2, or Mafia 1 and 2 or maybe, the entire Fire Emblem series. It depends on what I see first, I suppose. It is Anything Can Happen Thursday."

Penny's eyes lit up as she grinned, looking as if she had a great idea. "Hey, why don't you hang out with me and the twins? Since it's Anything Can Happen Thursday, hanging out with me will be something different." He stared at her, "The four of us have never really actually hung out for real. We can watch movies and talk and eat and hangout and eat some more. Sounds fun, right?"

His eye twitched as he tried to wrap his mind around what she had just suggested. This was the bad thing that he was talking about, earlier. There was no way he was going to spend his Thursday doing something he wouldn't do! Forget the premise of Anything Can Happen Thursday—she was probably just going to drag him to go shopping. She'd force him to watch something Raj would like… like that RENT movie thing or whatever Bridget Jones was! He'd rather be alone.

"Seeing as I have no reason nor lie to tell you that I cannot, I guess I will join you."

What?! That wasn't what he was supposed to say! He was supposed to decline!

"That's great!" She chirped ecstatically, her eyes lighting up a bit too much at him agreeing to it. Was this a joke? "I promise that you won't regret it! We're going to have so much fun!" She quickly stood on her tiptoes and gave him a brief kiss on the (dear god, the germs! Curse his sudden paralysis!) cheek. "I'll see you later, Sheldon!"

He watched in silence (disbelief? confusion?) as she jogged away from him; causing him to curse his mouth that had a mind of his own and completely forgetting about the fact that she had just kissed his cheek—that would have infected him way faster than the time they hugged for Switzerland. He had no idea what had just gotten himself into and started thinking on the possible excuses he'd use to back out from the arrangement.

This was just adding fuel to the fire.

"Maybe I should've just stayed at home…" he muttered, turning right to head to the university. If he could, he'd probably give his mouth two strikes for ruining everything.

* * *

This was definitely a big mistake. Huge.

Whenever he thought about Anything Can Happen Thursday, he usually envisioned himself picking a game he wouldn't play… like Paper Mario or Mass Effect or something. Then he'd have something he didn't eat on Thursdays like Indian food (which Raj abhors) or a smorgasbord of everything that his friends did not eat. Or steak. Steak was Anything Can Happen.

What he didn't think would happen, was Penny suggesting that they play 2-on-2 HALO and  _beating_  him. Every. Single. Freaking. Time. Which wasn't even funny when you think that they played twelve times, and he didn't win a single match. And because of the stupid bet they made—because; hey, Sheldon! Let's try something different and force the loser to do something! Who knows, you might make me stop whistling!—he had to watch two  _Penny_  approved: movies with her.

Curse Penny's unexplainable greatness at HALO and his foolishness of getting tricked by her.

They started with 'Pretty Woman' which proved to be as foolish as he expected. There was no way that the 'Pretty Woman' could prove that she had no diseases without showing tests! And why was she so moody when he offered to make her life better? A lot of people (sans him) would jump at any opportunity for sponsored housing and money every now and then. The man was just being kind enough to get her out of the germ infested dump she called her life!

"You idiot!" Penny had started with tears (what exactly was so emotional about it?!) in her eyes. "She didn't take it cause it makes her feel cheap! She just wants to be loved—and that's exactly what he does when he changes his mind and chases after her! You men are so insensitive!"

Regardless of his critical comments, he had already watched the movie with Raj, Leonard and Howard before. During the Anything Can Happen Thursday of April 2011. It was another HALO bet that somehow led to Raj getting emotional (dramatic) on how the four of them never hang out anymore. Which oddly led to Howard begging him to play Raj's favorite movies just to get him to shut up. It was torture going through it, but it made the second time not as worse. He still hated the movie, though.

Their second feature was (much to his dismay) the three hour long, non-Avatar movie; Titanic. Which was why Penny woke up extra early (seven on the dot) just so they would watch the overly dramatic—longer than it should be—movie about a ship and two foolish people that were too unrealistic in his opinion. Penny did not share that opinion.

"Why exactly are you crying?" Sheldon asked, eyes growing wide in confusion as Penny started sniffling against the throw pillow she was clutching. "What's so emotional about her seeing him again after she dies?"

Penny gave him a 'how are you not getting this' look and wiped her nose on her sleeve. "What's so emotional? Are you serious?!" He nodded. "Think about—Rose had a whole life without Jack, yet when she died, it was Jack that she returned to."

He raised an eyebrow, "and what exactly does that mean?"

"It means that even thought she only knew Jack for three days, he was the love of her life!" He didn't follow and she seemed to realize that. "God, I can't believe you're not getting this! Okay, remember the scene where she told them that Jack saved her?"

Yes, it was when Rose selfishly took up the entire metal… thing and allowed to Jack. Not only was he heroic (for not ignoring the cries of a damsel in distress) but he was also extremely stupid for saving her. Someone that selfish isn't worth saving. "Yes. That was when Rose hogged the thing. Quid pro quo, I'm telling you."

The blonde shook her head in dismissal, "no, you got it all wrong! Jack saved her in every way she could be saved. Before she met him, she was secluded from a lot of things and Jack was the one who opened her to everything that she was meant to experience. He taught her how to live, to love and to be happy. That's what's so great about the movie, even though they didn't end up together, he was the reason why she learned to live again—and he was her greatest love."

That was exactly what he expected her to say. Some speech about love and blah and blah. He was actually surprised that it didn't somehow end up to be something about shopping or shoes. What was so great about love, anyway?! It was tedious, exhausting, disappointing and downright annoying. And it was nothing but confusing. "That doesn't change my opinion on the movie. Besides, it had too much nudity! It's a good thing the twins are playing happily upstairs or else we'll have a big problem!"

Penny stood, stopping the movie and turning the lights on. "Please! You watch Game of Thrones; there's nudity in practically every episode. And it's not like the twins care. All they want is to be where everyone else is. Speaking of which, let's have lunch! I'll get the twins while you set the table." She gave him a quick smile and bolted out of the room before he could protest. Her setting the table was part of the deal and he guessed that there was nothing wrong with him doing it. That way, it would be done properly.

Although, he didn't mind when lunch was his favorite spaghetti with little cut up hot dogs.

"Dis dewishas, mommy!" Maddie exclaimed as she took in another mouthful of noodles.

Andy nodded in agreement, "dis da best, mommy! Andy wanna eat dis ebewiday!"

Sheldon cringed at the sight of his normally neat looking son's spaghetti smeared mouth and immediately grabbed a napkin to wipe it off. "Yes… well, that is what your grandmother calls a real eye-talian treat. Please, refrain from eating too messily. Or are you done?"

Maddie pushed her plate away from her and (like how Age of Conan obsessed Penny would do) burped. Loudly. "Ahh done! Tank ya, Mommy! Dis Maddie's new fabowit!"

Penny grinned—probably proud that their daughter took after her—and handed her her sippy cup. "Why thank you, sweetie. That's your daddy's favorite, too!" She turned to him and gave him a pleased look. "Didn't your mom say that this was what the Romans fed Jesus? Is that true?"

"Doubtful, but my mother does have a tendency to stay rather foolish things. My siblings and I tend to just ignore it." He explained as Andy finished his food, " I doubt they even met." He took the dishes and took them to the sink—ignoring Penny's cries of allowing her to do it. If you want it done right, do it yourself; that was a motto he strongly believed in. Penny sometimes failed to wash the dishes properly.

"So, what do you two want to do today?" He heard her ask the twins as he started on the dishes. "It's Anything Can Happen Thursday—that means that we can do things that your daddy won't approve of! Like watching The Notebook! You want to watch The Notebook, right?"

"Penny, don't manipulate the children." He scoffed from the sink, glancing over his shoulder to catch the glare that Penny threw him. "Even if they say that they want to watch it, we won't as I am certain that it's you who wants to watch it. I saw you 'To Watch' list,"

She snorted, "whatever! It was just a suggestion. So, whatcha wanna do, twins?"

"Andy wanna go to da pahk, pwease?"

"Dat good uh-dea!" Maddie chirped. "Maddie miss da pahk!"

Penny threw a crumpled tissue at his back, causing him to glower at her. "I guess the verdicts been made. Is the park acceptable, Dr. Cooper?"

"It's Anything Can Happen Thursday," he said, placing a plate on the dish rack, "who knows? My Anything Can Happen might be me catching some sort of disease at a park. Anything Can Happen."

The three blondes cheered and he inwardly sighed. Anything really  _could_  happen.

* * *

"—must you really be so messy with the ice cream?" Sheldon asked, taking a step away from the ice cream coated hand that belonged to Penny. "How does one even spill their ice cream?"

Penny shrugged as she sucked on the back of her hand, "I don't know… I was watching the twins then the cup sorta fell. Now, my hand is sticky." She extended her hand out to him and his germaphobic self screamed on the inside.

He pulled his bottle of sanitizer from his pocket and dropped it on her lap. "There! Clean that up and stop trying to wipe your hand on me."

"Keep scooting away and you're gonna fall off the bench, sweetie," she giggled, squeezing some gel on her hand before furiously rubbing her hands together. "I don't know why, but I can't help but be messy. It's kinda sad, to be honest."

For nearly three years he had been offering her lessons on hygiene and cleanliness and she never once accepted his offer. Yet, she questions why she can't help but be her messy old self. Maybe he should try again… no thanks. "You're a famous celebrity, shouldn't you be a bit more conscious on how you act and look in public? There might not be a lot of people in this park right now—which was why I chose this place in the first place—but, this is still considered as a public place. I wouldn't want you to be panned for having sticky fingers."

The blonde lifted her hands over her head and stared up at them; looking as if she was thinking deeply about something concerning her hands. "Sticky fingers, huh? You're right. I actually have to maintain the image that people have of me. Everywhere I go, I have to be this… inspirational actress who's not supposed to make mistakes. I guess you're the only one who actually ever sees me all messy an imperfect like this. Aside from the twins of course. Though… I might just love messing with ya."

She turned back to him and waggled her fingers forward, causing him to lean as far away as possible. "Penny, Penny, Penny," he started, prepared to jump off the bench if Penny touches him. "I've known you since before you were famous. I know many sides of you that a lot of people don't know. It would be foolish to pretend that you don't enjoy snacking on chocolate syrup alone—which, if i may say—is rather disgusting."

"Hey, that tastes really good with whip cream, too!" He ignored her protests and shifted his gaze to the twins who were happily playing at the sandbox five feet away from them. "And there's a lot to me that you don't know, kinda. Like the fact that I was there when Amy first suggested that the two of you have super smart kids or something. It was at the Glendale Galleria, March this year."

She avoided his inquisitive gaze and stood from the bench, causing him to follow her towards the sandbox. "Oh! Then, you should have stopped by and said—" she gave him a sad smile and he stopped once he realized what timeline that day fell in. That was when he was still furious at her for suddenly leaving. He probably would've just ignored her, or insulted her or fainted. It was hard to tell what reaction he'd have if she had approached him. "I guess that would seem rather unlikely given the circumstances."

Wait… was that the reason why she had refused to tell him about the twins?

Possible, but there was no point in asking.

"Mommy, Daddy, we wanna go to da pwaygwound!" Maddie said as Penny lifted her up. "Sand itchy!"

Sheldon looked around; there were more people in the park than when they had first arrived. Which promised a higher possibility of the twins catching a random disease. He wasn't going to let that happen. "The three of you wait here. I'll check the parameters, first, before risking our children's safety!" He exclaimed, stepping out of the gritty sandbox. "There's a reason why I gave them a custom made playground."

"I know that, but why do you have to check the playground?" Penny asked as she adjusted Maddie to her hip while Andy evened out the sand. "I have no problem with someone approaching me, if that's what you're fussing about."

"No, this is just a precautionary measure—now, stay there." He extended his arm out to make her stop. "We will never sense danger until it hits us right in the face. This is the first time we've ever been to this park, and considering that it's Anything Can Happen Thursday, anything can happen."

Penny stared at him before she chuckled, "Sheldon, I don't think that anything's gonna happen. Remember the last time we spent Anything Can Happen Thursday together? We were just skyping each other and nothing big happened. You gotta loosen up."

She would probably never understand the unease he had when it came to the twins. He watched Rugrats, he saw the many horrible things that could possibly happen to his progeny and he wasn't going to let that happen! They could be sent of the the jungle with a bunch of stranger for all the he knows. Just for ACHT, he'd take on the role of 'brave father' to ensure that no such things happens. "This  _is_  me loosening up, Penny. Now, stay still and let me ensure our safety!"

It  _was_  ACHT, which meant that he could do things that he normally didn't do that would disrupt his schedule. Like channeling his inner Indiana Jones, sans the get up and the equipment, but he'd do. This was the first time that they had ever gone to this park—mainly because Penny said 'it's ACHT, let's go to a different park!'—so he had no idea whatsoever of what the demographic of the park was. He just really hoped that they weren't thugs or gangsters or mobster—

"Dr. Cooper is that you?!"

Based on the tone, pitch and familiarity of the voice that called him; he already had a strong hunch—no, he  _knew_  who that was.

Anything really could happen.

He slowly turned around, his safe haven (the playground) looking far away as he faced someone he hadn't seen in a  _very_  long time. "Ms. Nowitzki, what a surprise to see you here."

The redhead—who looked as if she couldn't believe that it was actually him—continued gaping at him before she broke out of her trance and grinned. "I know! Of all places—who would have thought that I would see you here!" She (trotted) made her way towards him, a wide grin plastered on her face. She hadn't changed in four years that passed. At all. "How are you? You look really great!"

"I'm doing well. I have recently published a paper disproving Loop Quantum Gravity and helped a bunch of Chinese scientists to discover a new super element." Judging from the way Ramona grinned and nodded along to what he said; she obviously already knew that. "And you? What have you been up to, lately?"

Something sparkled in his former (student?) acquaintance's eyes that told him that this wouldn't end well. Like an odd sense of deja vu, except he knew exactly how this ended before. "I just graduated last year and now I'm a physics professor at UCLA." She placed her hands behind her back and started… swaying. He briefly wondered if she needed to go to the bathroom. "I often use your work as my teaching material—but I've already applied at Caltech as a theoretical physicist… just gaining some experience."

What was this, a game where you need to fight monsters to gain experience and level up? "Fascinating, you seem to be doing well," he quickly said, hoping to end the discussion, "I wish you luck… that is, if I believed in luck. Well, it was pleasant to see you—"

"Wait!" She grabbed his arm and pulled him towards her—much to his dismay. Curse her height. "I know we've had some trouble in the past—but, I'm really sorry about that. I really didn't meant to be so pushy," presumptuous was actually the right word to define it, "I just really wanted you to get that paper done. And I'm sorry for pushing my luck and obnoxiously forcing you to put add me in it. It was wrong, and I've really felt bad about it. Please, forgive me?"

He stared at her pleading eyes and sighed. He supposed that she  _did_  help in getting him to focus on the paper, but that didn't mean that he'd share credit. No way, Jose. "All's forgiven, Ramona. That was in the past, and I have several other more relevant work that have been published. Water under the bridge, as they say."

"Dr. Cooper, if you ever need an assistant please know that I'm always available. And I promise never to ask you to share credit. Just being there as you changed the world is enough for me—everyone at UCLA is jealous whenever I tell them that I know you. We're all big fans." Her expression changed from apologetic to a mysterious smile that he had a hard time figuring out. "If you ever need anything or just want to have dinner together or something—I still have the same number."

As long as she didn't make him share credit, he guessed that it would be okay. He knew that she was just one of his crazy fans that would do anything for him. What a nice girl. She must really admire him. "I already have an assistant, but I'll keep that in mind. I might need your encouragement when I get stuck on—"

"Sheldon, there you are!" He turned to where the voice came from and found Penny and the twins heading towards him. "How long does it take to check—" the blonde paused, noticing Ramona and turning towards her, "hey! You're Ramona! It's been a while since we last saw each other."

Ramona's eyes widened as her gaze shifted from him to Penny to the twins. "Uh, yeah… four years, actually. Looks like a lot has changed."

Penny titled her head in confusion before realizing what she was talking about. "Oh! This is Maddie and Andy," she gestured to Maddie who was on her hip then to Andy who held her hand. "Twins, this is Ramona. She's your daddy's friend." Andy stared up at her and gingerly waved while Maddie looked away. Maddie never did like strangers.

"Wow, I didn't expect you and Dr. Cooper to end up together," Ramona remarked, causing Sheldon to glare at her, "but I'm glad to know that I was right about you having being in love with Dr. Cooper! I didn't think that you'd act on it—but there's two adorable humans that prove your love for him!"

Sheldon noticed that Penny's face turned red as she comprehended what the redhead said. "W—wait! I neve—" the blonde stammered, turning to him then back at Ramona, "it's not—I don't… I didn't!"

"It's alright!" Ramona interjected, waving her hand in dismissal at the stunned blonde. "The two of you look good together. Well, I have to go, Dr. Cooper—if you ever need someone to collaborate with, don't hesitate to call me. It was nice to see you!" She gave them a smile snd a wave before running off to a group of people at the other side of the park.

He looked around the park as Penny took several deep breaths. He hadn't noticed that he was just fifteen feet from the sandboxes. Which meant that…

"She hasn't changed much in four years," Penny commented once she had regained her composure, walking towards the playground. "But, I think she dyed her hair. It looks lighter than before. She  _kinda_  looks blonde, doesn't she? Like a strawberry blonde or something."

He thought back to how Ramona looked and nodded, helping Andy up the playground steps. The toddler was too energetic for his own good. "Yes, her hair did look lighter. If I may ask—in a way Howard would—what just happened?" He grumbled, slightly confused about what had just occurred.

Penny watched Maddie slide down the shortest slide and laughed. "That was me, having your back. It's Anything Can Happen Thursday—who knows, your anything can happen might be Ramona trapping you in her basement."

Sheldon ignored the teasing smile that she was sending him and moved to make sure that Andy didn't trip down the big slide. "Yes, if that's true, then I guess I owe you a thank you."

"Anytime, sweetie," she grinned at him and moved Maddie over to the swing sets.

This Anything Can Happen Thursday might be better than he originally thought.

"So… remember your first Anything Can Happen Thursday where you made Leonard upset by flirting with Stuart?"

"Oh god, don't remind me."

* * *

When Sheldon discovered the formula that made all the numbers coincide, he could not say that he saw it coming. He was in the middle of playing Final Fantasy when it just popped into his head, and the next thing he knew, he was continuously writing everything in his mind onto his blackboard until there was nothing left. After checking the numbers and the letters thirty-seven times, he realized that there was a big chance that he was going to win the Nobel, soon.

That was the same Eureka moment he experienced when he grumbled something to himself and Penny laughed, and her voice sounded like bells ringing—which was impossible as she was tone deaf—and was oddly accompanied by a single light shining over her and it was like time slowed down and his mind seemed to be unable to form a coherent thought as she kept laughing. It was like another set of bricks hitting him in the face, and all he could do was to stare at her like a complete total idiot.

And so, he consulted the self-proclaimed expert on love.

"Oh my freaking, god, dude! You're in love with Penny!"

"Am not."

"Are, too."

"Am not."

"Are, too."

"Am not!"

"Dude, you can't even say anything other than am not! You're head over heels over Penny!"

"No way!"

Both Raj and Sheldon turned to find Leonard gaping at them from the doorway. Leonard's eyes were wide as his mouth fell open, "Sheldon finally admitted it?!"

The astrophysicist nodded, extending his hand out to receive the handful of bills that Leonard was handing him. "Yup! And he doesn't know what to do about it!"

And that was how Sheldon found himself getting interrogated by his two friends about Penny. Which was stupid, because what he needed was advice; not to go to a therapist. If he needed to get his mind evaluated, he should've just contacted Beverly Hofstadter. At least she wouldn't hold this crucial information against him. She would probably just tell him that relationships were an enigma and that she had no expertise on that subject. Which was definitely better than Leonard writing it down and Raj secretly recording the conversation.

"—right, we both got sick and were both stuck in our hotel room the entire time," Leonard explained with a sigh of defeat, "it sucked. But, enough of that! Tell us more about your newfound feelings for Penny!"

This was such a terrible idea. "I've already answered everything that you asked—what else can I say?!"

Raj—who was now the one who wrote everything down—waved his pen at him, pretending as if he was an actual therapist. "I want you to elaborate what you feel. Do you want to buy her a shiny diamond ring? Do you want to give her an encouraging pat on the back? Or maybe a hi five? Something like that."

If he had known that this was how 'asking Raj' would go, he would've just kept everything to himself. It had been an hour and a half since he consulted Raj and yet he still had no idea on what he was supposed to do with himself. As much as he'd love to just walk out and pretend that nothing happened, the realization had been troubling him nonstop. He couldn't focus on his work with Penny bothering his thoughts! "I am not sure on what I want. That's why I came to you, if you're forgetting that."

"Right, right." Raj scribbled something on his notepad. "So, when did you first realize that you were in love with her? And be specific—you have an eidetic memory, you remember everything."

Curse his stupid—yet sometimes handy—eidetic memory. He did remember everything, but he really couldn't tell when as he had no idea how someone even knows when they 'fall in love' with someone. Based on the movies and shows he's watched and comic book he's read, it just happens. "Is it important?"

Leonard shook his head, "well, not really. But, we were just hoping that you'd know, cause you remember everything. When did you start to see Penny differently?"

"Differently from what?"

"Never mind him!" Raj interjected, crossing something off on his notepad. "You must have fallen in love with her before you realized it—that's a common trope among clueless bumbling men like you who think they know everything but know nothing when it comes to romance." Sheldon sent Leonard a 'what is he talking about?' look which he responded with a shrug. "And that's why you have me; the expert who will set you on the right path. So, what are you going to do with Amy?"

"What about Amy?" Sheldon asked in confusion; wondering what the neurobiologist had to do with anything.

Raj clucked his tongue at him with a hint of disapproval. "Dude, Amy likes you!"

Leonard nodded in agreement, "you even planned on having intellectually benign overlord children with her. That must have meant something."

"Amy is my friend—we've been through this many times before, gentlemen," he hissed in annoyance, "she is a girl that is my friend, but she is not my girlfriend. Two years, we've been running this drill yet you still don't understand."

Raj rolled his eyes before pulling his phone out to call someone. "Hello? Sorry for bothering you but this is a Code About Time. I'm putting you on loudspeaker." He placed his phone on his desk and raised the volume. "Okay dude, you're good to go."

"Hey guys," Howard's voice boomed, happiness evident in his tone, "Bernadette's jet skiing and I have no plan of getting into the water without wearing any sunblock. So, what's up? Is it really Code About Time?"

"Listen, dude, Sheldon just admitted that he's in love with Penny!"

"Well, it's about damn time!" Howard exclaimed through his phone, making Sheldon roll his eyes. They probably just had another bet that involved him. "But crap, now I owe all of you money. Bernadette's gonna be really happy about this—oh and hey, is Sheldon, there?"

The theoretical physicist groaned before leaning towards the phone. "Yes, Howard, I am here."

"Great, I'm feeling pretty generous, so—Sheldon, listen to me, okay?" He knew that the tiny engineer wouldn't be able to see him, but he still nodded. "You should tell Penny before Collin does something or before she thinks that you don't like her—cause believe me; you're great at making everyone feel like you don't like them. Don't worry, I have no doubt in mind that she likes you, too. We can all tell, you know."

"Howard's right, Sheldon," Leonard added, "you gotta do something before you miss your chance. Besides, you won't be able to think straight until you find out how Penny feels. Believe me, I know—I've been down that road before."

"Dude, you're not supposed to bring up your relationship with Penny while talking about her relationship with Sheldon!"

"Raj's right, you sound like a jerk. Just cause your relationship was doomed doesn't mean that Sheldon's will, too."

"I think he's still mad about the whole beautiful and smart babies thing."

"Leonard, that's horrible! Why would you take a jab at Sheldon for living your dreams?"

"Oh, shut up, Howard!"

Ignoring his noisy friends, Sheldon inwardly sighed. This was the reason why he stayed away from foolish problems such as relationships and feelings; it was nothing but a plethora of confusion and trouble. He doubted that he would get anything beneficial from all of this, but he had a feeling that his friends were right. He had to tell Penny before it was too late.

Too bad it wasn't Anything Can Happen Thursday anymore. If it was, maybe he'd have the guts to do so.

* * *

"Well, Penny's running late," Leonard said, glancing at his wristwatch. "I wonder what's up."

Sheldon snorted in derision. This was exactly what he had expected when Leonard foolishly accepted Penny's offer to drive them to work  _and_  to pick them up for work just because she thought that it was a good idea. Now, they were going to go through Raj whining on how they made him wait for dinner. Great. "I told you to bring your car, but you didn't listen. Now we're going to have to listen to Raj complaining on how our 'gang' is falling apart."

"Oh yeah… but he's bringing Lucy, right?" That was right, Raj was bringing his lady friend to meet Penny. Judging from how their first encounter went, they were going to have to block every window and possible exit to avoid her running out. Penny was definitely going to intimidate her. "Then he won't be too dramatic when we arrive late—his main problem is stopping Lucy from escaping."

Crossing his arms, he decided to instead look for any sign of Penny. Other than a woman making her way towards them, there was no trace of the blonde. Come to think of it, the woman looked  _very_  familiar… like he had seen her more than once before…

"Sheldon, hi!"

It was the girl he and Raj met when he agreed to be his wingman during that mixer for grad students—Martha! Twice in one week. "Martha, hello. It certainly a pleasant surprise to see you."

The brunette—was she a grad student or one of the faculty?—grinned up at him. "I know, it's been quite a while actually. You look great!"

She even said the exact same thing that Ramona had told him. Interesting. He was about to respond when he saw Leonard staring at him in confusion. He pitied those without eidetic memory. "Leonard, this is Martha—if you recall, Raj and I met her and her friend, Abby, at the mixer three years ago. They even played Rock Band."

Leonard furrowed his eyebrows in thought before (finally) remembering her. "Oh yeah… I remember you. Okay."

Sheldon sent his roommate a glare before turning his attention back to Martha. "Ignore him; how have you been? How's your friend Abby?"

"Abby's okay, she got married last month and I'm doing fine—but nothing compared to you. I read your paper online and it was amazing!" She certainly looked amazed and kind of like a brunette Ramona. They might be good friends if they ever met each other. "I'm actually going to start working here soon, that's why I'm here."

Just like Ramona. How amusing. "Congratulations, I am certainly sure that you'll be a wonderful addition to the university—whatever department you may come from."

"Thank you, I'm really looking forward to seeing you around." Martha admitted, not meeting Sheldon's questioning gaze. For nearly three years she had hoped that she would meet with him again—she even thought of just going straight to his apartment to ask him out, but after their last encounter ended, she was a bit embarrassed to see him again. But it wasn't as if seeing him again was her top priority, no, it was just a little wish or so.

Which finally came true  _today_  and she was so happy that she got accepted in the university. She was finally going to get a chance at befriending him instead of being Abby's wingman—woman. School had gotten in the way and she certainly couldn't be single forever. Today was going to be the start of her new life as a single woman! "Uh, Sheldon, by the way; I was wondering if you're free for dinner tonight?"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow at her while his friend's eyes were wide as saucers. She remembered him. He was the one who intruded in them playing Rock Band. She was just going to ignore him. "Two invites within a week—I'm on a roll." Please say yes. Please say yes. Please say yes! "Anyway, I'm afraid I can't tonight as Leonard and I have plans—" damn, she got too excited and it was too early for something like that. "—perhaps we can reschedule?"

There it was—the silver lining she had been waiting for! Three whole years and finally she was going to have actual alone time with Sheldon that was a result of Abby sticking her tongue down that Raj's guys throat and making everything uncomfortable for her. "Yeah! Just tell me when you're free and—"

"I'm so sorry that I'm late!"

Martha turned her head to find a (gorgeous) blonde and two toddlers making their way towards where they were standing. She had actually never seen someone so pretty before—and those kids were so adorable! She briefly wondered who she was talking to.

"Penny," she heard Sheldon start, his expression souring at the sight of the three blondes, "I am expecting an explanation as to why you're so la—"

"Daddy! Daddy! Maddie make Andy go ow!" One toddler said, clinging on to Sheldon's jacket—wait, daddy?!

The other toddler crossed her arms and stuck her tongue out at the other one. "Maddie no do dat! Daddy, Andy wying!"

The oldest blonde proceeded to lift the female toddler up before sighing. "Don't mind them, it's just one of those fights." Sheldon shook his head while the blonde finally notice her. "Oh hi. Leonard's who's this?"

Sheldon gestured over to her and smiled, "Penny, this is my friend, Martha. We met at one of the university mixers that Raj and I went to."

The blo— _Penny_  extended her hand out as she sent her a charming grin. She seemed like a really nice person and she had a feeling that she had seen her somewhere before… "Hi, I'm Penny, and this is our twins, Andy and Maddie. Twins, say hi to your daddy's friend."

Wait.  _Their_  twins? Daddy?

Oh crap.

Martha plastered a fake smile on her face and shook the blonde's hand. There was her new chance. "Nice to meet you, too, Penny."

"Martha just asked me out for dinner, but I told her that I had plans today," Sheldon explained to the blonde, "isn't she nice?"

The charmingly friendly expression on the blonde's face suddenly dropped and was replaced by something…  _hostile_  that sent a chill down her spine, despite the bright smile that masked it. If she didn't know any better, this girl was going to kill her. "Oh, really?" She could hear the murderous intent (what had she done?!) drip from her voice and saw that the Leonard guy had noticed the sudden shift of the atmosphere.

"Hey guys," the bespectacled man interrupted, staring down at his phone, "Raj just texted, saying that he's already at the restaurant. We should really go."

Sheldon clucked his tongue, obviously unhappy with his friend rushing him. "Fine, but you should all know that our being late is all Penny's fault." He turned to face her and offered her a small, friendly smile. "Since you're now working at the university, let's just meet up sometime. It was nice seeing you, again." He picked up the male toddler and walked off as Leonard waved at her, rushing after him.

The blonde sent her one last vicious glare before walking off after them.

Well, there was lots of other fish in the sea.

"Um, excuse me," a redhead said, quickly approaching her, "that was Dr. Cooper, right?"

Martha raised an eyebrow and nodded. "Yeah, why?"

"I was going to consult him on something important. I guess it could wait." The redhead let out a disappointed sigh before shifting the folder tucked in between her arm.

Martha nodded, looking back at the parking area to see if he was still there. He had probably got in the car already. Oh well. "Random question; do you like him? I can tell by the way you sighed wistfully."

The redheaded raised her eyebrows in shock before shrugging. "Yeah, I guess. But, did you see how that blonde glared at you? I suggest that you not mess with her. She's probably been in love with him for years now." Well that explained everything. There was a lot of other men in this university and she guessed that she'd just try her luck and go to another of their mixers.

"By the way," the redheaded started, reaching her hand out to her. "I'm Ramona, nice to meet you."


	21. Loose Ends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to settle loose ends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyway, I'm not sure how you guys will receive this chapter. Some will be happy, some will think it was rushed, some will think its vague, some will be sad and some will be mad. The only thing I can say is that this is how I've always planned things to go. The last part of this chapter was written in late 2012 along with a few other chapters.
> 
> Yes, this story has been waiting that long to see the world.
> 
> Disclaimer; I suck at romance. This chapter is also vague and slightly rushed. And kinda cliche and cheesy. I'm just following my outline from two years ago, just tweaked it a bit.

In the last nine years that Dr. Sheldon Cooper had been roommates with Dr. Leonard Hofstadter, he could say that there were several (nearly innumerable) occurrences where his roommate did something that was  _very_  upsetting.

For instance, when he screwed up his experiment to be with Penny and the time when he dated Priya. And Penny. And Leslie Winkle.

However, among the many, many, many ( _many_ ) times that his roommate upset him, this was definitely something that could be considered among the top three worst things he ever did.

"What is that?" Sheldon inquired, pointing to the screen.

Leonard nonchalantly glanced up at him before turning back to his laptop. "I've been thinking of moving out, so I decided to look at some apartments that are available for rent. It's nothing really."

There was something about the way Leonard seemed to be so calm at such a serious moment that made Sheldon feel as if his roommate had hit him on he head with a lightsaber. "Why? Aren't you happy here?"

"I am, it's just that—I'm thirty-two, I should be thinking about major life decisions by now," Leonard sighed dramatically, as if his problem was actually a problem that was worth wasting precious time on. "Like settling down, and how many kids I want. That's what most men our age think about when they're at this age."

Sheldon scoffed, "I've never considered that, yet, look at me. I'm fine."

His—soon to be former—roommate shook his head, "that's easy for you to say! You already have two kids and have your life set out in front of you. Not everyone can plan their entire life in advance. The having kids thing was just a lucky roll of the dice for you, though."

"Please," he snorted, "I don't believe in luck. What I  _do_  believe in, is the fact that you're violating the roommate agreement!" He pulled open a drawer, grabbing the agreement and throwing it on Leonard's lap. "Section 47B; the various actions one shall  _not_  do shall one be overwhelmed with several distortions in the reality that one is accustomed to. Homeostasis is the name of the game, Leonard! Is that so hard to understand?"

"Look, buddy—"

"—don't you buddy me!—"

"—Sheldon," Leonard corrected, raising his hands up in defense; afraid that he would get vaporized on the spot. That is, if he could do that. "You have to understand that I can't live with you forever. I have to be independent or else my mother  _and_  my siblings will never let me hear the end of it. We can't be roommates forever."

Sheldon raised his eyebrows in confusion, unable to comprehend what was just happening. "Of course we can! I am your surrogate family—where you biological family lack, I make up for! If you leave, who's going to drive me to work? And get me takeout? And go with me to the comic book store?"

"Penny can do that," replied Leonard, shrugging and pretending that he wasn't ruining his equanimity. "I'm sure that she'll be happy to do all those things for you—as long as you ask nicely."

He would do no such nonsense! What did he have to do to get Leonard back to his senses?! "There is no way that that is happening. We are bound by an agreement, Leonard—wait, what if I go with you? Yes, that's right. I'll just go with you."

Leonard gave him that confused look that made him look like he was constipated. He always made that face when they disagreed on something—which they did often. "No, you won't, this is your family, you're not going with me. You won't even notice that I'm gone! Besides, who says that we can't stick with your routine if I move out?"

"I do," Sheldon huffed, getting frustrated at his roommate, "I notice  _everything_ , Leonard, and with my eidetic memory I can easily see what's wrong with my surroundings. And I can go with you if I want to."

"You're acting immature," Leonard pointed out.

"Says the man who just  _has_  to ruin everything!" There was absolutely no way that he was going to allow Leonard to move out. Everything was already so out of control that he didn't need another unwanted shift in his everyday paradigm. The only shift he was actually happy about was the fact that he had a 62.98% chance of winning the Nobel for his recent work. That was it. He didn't need another migraine. "I've made up my mind; I'm going with you."

The experimental physicist gave him a look of exhaustion. "It's not even fina—you know what? Fine. If you want to go with me, go tell Penny snd the twins that you're planning on moving out."

Sheldon looked away and scowled; there was no way that he could do that without seeing tears.

"You should stop running away, Sheldon," Leonard said, turning back to his laptop and closing the tabs with the listings. "It's about time that you tell Penny that you like her—you can't use me as a shield to dodge the fact that you don't know what to do with your newfound affection for her."

That wasn't his problem! Well, technically it  _was_ —but it was just a mere fraction of a much bigger problem. It had barely been a month since they had moved in with Penny and he  _still_  had yet to comprehend the fact that he no longer lived in a somewhat cramped apartment that gave him little to no privacy. A five bedroom (with a two bedroom separate guest house) house was a gigantic leap from a two bedroom apartment.

Although, he had to admit that he had (kind of) gotten accustomed to all of the free space and that it was nice to not be able to hear Leonard (or Penny's) snoring. However, Leonard moving out and leaving him all alone was just something that was too soon. He didn't need another problem in his life! Homeostasis. That was all he asked for. Really.

Non shifting relationship paradigms were also included in what he wanted. Homeostasis. Platonic. Friends. Homeostasis. Neighbors. Friends. No more moving. No romance. No single ray of light shining down on someone. No confusion on how he was supposed to act around someone. No  _romance_. He really wasn't asking for a lot, just homeostasis.

He crossed his arms, preparing to stand his ground. He wasn't going to be easily defeated by his tiny roommate. If Penny could go junior rodeo, he could blow up minds. Or have intellectual debates; which ever he gets challenged to first. "No I don't want to. As Raj always says, what they don't know won't hurt them. Plus, that has nothing to do with this matter. I'm going with you—end of discussion."

Leonard's eyebrows rose for a moment—probably contemplating his next move—before his face relaxed. There was nothing better than seeing Leonard give up at another futile attempt at ruining the equilibrium in their lives. Like when he said hi to Penny five years ago. "Alright, fine. You can go with me."

"I knew that you'd forget this foolish game of tryi—"

"— _if_  you tell Penny that you're moving out."

He wordlessly glared at Leonard's smug face that he so  _desperately_  wanted to vaporize. Leonard had recently been making him want to vaporize him. Darn him and his rarely used cleverness. And that cursed smirk he had. Vainglorious was the right word to describe how his roommate felt right now. "I don't need to tell her anything."

The experimental physicist shrugged, his smugness unfaltering as he closed his laptop and got up from his desk. "Suit yourself. If you're actually planning on moving out, you've got to tell her sooner or later, right?" Leonard grinned before he walked out of the study room; leaving Sheldon to rethink the idea of moving out. He wasn't good with tears, and telling Penny had a possibility of someone (namely two blonde toddlers) crying—and he didn't want that to happen!

Leonard didn't just upset him, he also  _infuriated_  him.

Forget homeostasis; allowing him to move out  _might_  just be a good idea.

* * *

"And that's a wrap! Excellent job everybody! It was such a great time working with all of you!"

Penny grinned happily as the entire Hindsight cast and crew cheered while exchanging hugs with each other. It was the  _actual_  last day of taping for the movie (reshoots included) and something about it just made her feel emotional. They had been together for nearly five straight months, shooting nonstop to meet the deadline for the Cannes Film Festival.

Their main director trotted over to where she was standing—while wiping back a few tears—and gave her a rather bone crushing hug that she was definitely going to miss. Their director was just like Mr. Fleming (their director in Halfway There) he was a jolly old man that kinda reminded her of santa who was scary as hell when it took more than five takes to shoot a scene. All in all, she loved the guy and thought of him as one of her favorite uncles.

"Penny! You don't know how much I'm going to miss you," he sniffed—he was a tad bit too dramatic sometimes, "I'll never find another gal who can hogtie someone faster than you can—which, is surprisingly a very handy skill for an action film."

She chuckled at the compliment, "hey, I'm gonna miss you, too. You're the only person I know who can eat cabbage dipped in any flavor of Smuckers." He nodded, eyeing the tent with the buffet table with said food. She would never understand his taste in food. It probably had something to do with his creativity or something. "I don't want to get in the way of you and you Smubbage—I'll get Mr. Fleming to have dinner with us soon."

The director beamed at the invitation before waving and heading back to the buffet table that was specially catered to his tastes. Though, that wasn't something everyone liked. Aside from his Smubbage, the only food there were a plethora of bread (director's favorite) and cold cuts—another of his favorites. It was really a good thing that some of the staff always brought real food. Or else she would have to go on a diet.

She was actually feeling really emotional right now. She'd miss the staff; the crew, the jolly director, the cranky director, the director that's not really a director and everyone in the cast—well, maybe not everyone.

"Hey Collin." She plastered on a smile as she approached the auburn haired man who had just parted ways with one of their lighting directors.

"Penny," he greeted, mirroring her smile. She would probably miss that too; he had a nice smile—it was as white and shiny as the teeth that are seen in toothpaste advertisements. "Does this mean you're finally talking to me and have forgiven me?"

Honestly speaking, she still wasn't happy about what he did last time, but it  _was_  the last day of filming. After this, they probably wouldn't be seeing much of each other unless they hung out or a handful of producers liked them together and got them for a movie. She didn't want to hold grudges nor have bad blood with anyone, no matter how annoyingly obnoxious they were.

"It's the last day, so why not," she teased, earning a chuckle from him. How exactly their friendship turned from friends to one sided petulance, she'll never know. It probably stemmed from something either regarding their supposed 'relationship' or Sheldon. Wait, what did Sheldon have to do with her and Collin's friendship? Ever since Sheldon came back into her life, her opinion on Collin drastically changed.

The two guys only met once, yet she already knew that they both disliked each other. The other night (about two weeks ago) while she was tucking the twins into bed, Andy had told her about how Sheldon got mad when one of the guys mentioned Collin. Then Maddie added that she she didn't like him, too. Like father like children. So, what if he practically hated him and so did the twins—

Damn, it always had something to do with him. Before she left the twins to that giant praying mantis, she had no problems whatsoever with Collin. She even thought he was cute at one point—heck, she even considered dating him! Then—BAM! she started to hate his guts. How exactly that happened, she'll never understand, but she knew that this had  _a lot_  to do with that little—as said man always says—conundrum she has with him. Gah. Sheldon was definitely going to be the death of her.

Collin rubbed the back of his head and sighed, "look, I'm sorry if had been too much of a jerk. I guess… I just overreacted. I admit; I really liked the idea of dating another celebrity. It was wrong of me, and I really apologize. I hope it's not too late for us to be friends?"

Penny smiled up at him, "no, it's not. I'd be happier if we stayed friends—I don't wanna lose my sandwich buddy. No one makes a meaner ham sandwich than you, Collin."

He let out a laugh before sticking his hand out for her to shake. "And no ones scarfs a sandwich quicker than you. I also wanted to tell you that I've started going out with Sheila from the lighting department—she said that you said some pretty nice things about me. Thanks."

She waved her hand dismissively while hiding the smugness she felt at the thought that she was an excellent matchmaker. She had heard about Sheila's crush on Collin and had (secretly) managed to get them to go out on a date. Mainly because she wanted the rumors of them dating to finally end—with Collin actually  _dating_  someone—and to set him with someone nice. Killing two birds with one stone. Figuratively speaking. "I just that she'd be a good match for you, and it would finally end the rumors of you and me dating."

"Oh, that," his eyebrows rose in recognition, his face scrunching up with distaste. "I know what you mean. The other day, me and Sheila were out on a date when the paps cornered us and started bombarding me with questions about you. I never realized how irritating it was to be asked about someone when you're with someone else until it finally happened to me. I'm sorry about that." He let out another sigh before his moth stretched to a cheshire grin. "You know, I've had a feeling that you liked that Sheldon guy since your twins' birthday—It's probably why I kept overreacting."

Her eyes widened as some of the people who overheard started chuckling—primarily because they were all at the twins' party, as well. God, she could already feel her face burning up. Damn him! "I—it's not—well I'm not sure—god!"

"Relax, Penny, it's alright," Collin said, patting her shoulder as an unsuccessful attempt at trying to calm her down. "On one of our dates, Sheila told me that I made an ass of myself during that party when I came up on stage. Especially when everyone saw how you looked at him—which, if I may add,  _everyone_  noticed. It's probably why I gave up on my crush on you. I kinda didn't stand a chance against you knight in dark armor."

No use denying it, now. She probably looked so stupid staring at that whack-a-doodle the entire time that they were on stage. And everyone. saw. it. damn. "I'm not even going to justify that with a follow up comment. But, I'm happy that my matchmaking services worked out on you. We should all hang out sometime and you can make your awesome sandwiches."

Collin happily nodded his head in agreement, "sure! And you can eat it all up and set a new record for the fastest sandwich eater alive." He laughed as she playfully smacked his arm and she remembered why she liked him. Random jerkiness aside, he was a fun guy to be around and made great food. He could also juggle and that was ultra awesome. "Hey, we'll schedule that soon. Let's work together again, okay?"

"Yeah, that would be great. Maybe, we can even go drift racing, again and I'll beat you like I always do."

"I'll practice and I'll get better, you'll see. It was fun working with you—" he smiled down at her before taking a step back, "good luck with that Sheldon guy. He looks like a bit of trouble, but he seems alright. Me and Sheila are cheering you on, so we better see another pair of adorable twins, soon!"

She scoffed and smirked, "yeah right! Focus on your own relationship, Harris!"

"Right back at you, Penny!"

She watched him meet Sheila—who waved at her from where she stood—by one of the trailers before walking out of the location. That was certainly easier than she had expected it to be.

One problem down, one more to go.

* * *

"—and so I told him; the only way he'll take it is if you roll it the way he wants. I showed them how to do it, and I am now in the marijuana monkey department. Fascinating isn't it?" Amy waited for Sheldon—who was playing with his teabag—to respond and sighed.

So, she was right; he was not listening to anything she was saying in the past (she checked her watch) eighteen minutes. At first she had thought that Sheldon finally understood what the definition of being a 'good listener' was, but seeing as he was Sheldon and that flying turtles had a bigger possibility of being real than him not interrupting a conversation just to speak, her first theory was out the window and dead on the sidewalk.

About thirty minutes (or so) ago, Sheldon suddenly showed up at her apartment, asking for her to give him some so called 'advice' on a matter he had yet to discuss. So far, the only thing he had shared with her was that he would like some tea as social protocol states that if a friend is upset, they should offer them a beverage. And based on his level of 'unhappiness' he only required a cup of earl grey tea, and not strawberry Quik.

"Sheldon, this may sound nosey—and it will to people who didn't come here to ignore me—but, is there something wrong? It is unlike you to not interrupt me whenever I talk about work."

The theoretical physicist heaved a rather dramatic exasperated sigh, "I'm alright."

"Oh yeah? Then what have I been talking about these past nineteen minutes?"

He glanced up from his mug; his face twisting up in confusion before he sighed, again. It was as if he was so troubled that the only thing he could do was emit a pitiful audible breath. She briefly wondered if it would be wrong to call any of the guys to pick him up and take him away from her before this 'problem" is actually an airborne disease that could kill her. "Fine," he grumbled, dropping the teabag back into the mug, "I'm troubled by something I have absolutely no experience in."

She raised a curious eyebrow and slowly reached for her notebook that sat on her shelf. "That's a start. Please, continue."

"My problem is that the only thing I can think about is that confusing enigma that somehow suddenly inserted its way into my mind and won't get out. Because of it, I can no longer concentrate on my work, and I can't do anything about it—as if I do any action regarding it, I might mess up and I don't want to end up like Leonard who became a fool because of it." He huffed (probably out of breath due to what he said) and took a long sip from his mug. "It's a rather exasperating conundrum, is it not?"

Well, it wasn't as if she actually understood a single word he said. All she got was; Leonard, fool and I can't concentrate on everything because of it. The answer (or problem, if you will) ranged from another one of his childish comic books to a new experiment he was working on. The latter being a bit more comprehendible if him turning into Leonard was the only factor in his problem. There was also a chance that he had finally lost it.

She was going to try to be optimistic for this. Regardless of how silly he sounded. She was just going to have to work with what she had and slowly make her way to getting him to reveal more information. Like a game show of some sort.

"That doesnt necessarily mean that you'll be like Leonard. He is a different person a he is an experimental physicist and you are a theoretical physicist. Clearly there is a vast difference between the two fields." She scribbled something on her notebook and frowned. "Wait, what exactly are we talking about?"

Sheldon blinked, looking like he had just returned from space or whatever world he went to when he zones out. "I'm talking about Penny."

All he could think about. Cannot concentrate on work. Cannot do anything about it. If he messes up he'll end up who turned into a fool because of it. Translation; all he could think about was Penny and because of it he can't concentrate on his work. He thinks that if he (she assumes this part) tells her how he feels, she might reject him and he'll end up hurt—or chasing after her—like Leonard.

Oh. How disheartening.

Then reading all those romance novels that Raj recommended to her—to help her understand the social sciences and how to further understand the minds of people whose only aspiration in life is to love and be loved in return—actually helped her understand a pitifully tangled mind. What an interesting discovery this has been. This could be a wonderful topic for an essay or a thesis for people who fail in academics.

She placed her pen on the table and closed the notebook before pushing her glasses up. "Well, I can't say that I'm not surprised. I certainly did not expect that, yet I already had a hunch."

He stared at her with wide eyes while she pretended to write something. They were both bad at confrontations. "You knew?"

She found it funny how this situation reminded her so much of that day two months (and seven days) ago when she revealed to him that she knew that the twins were his. This was actually the same scenario—well, not exactly, as that was nowhere near as dejecting as how she was feeling right now. That and the fact that she wasn't anything like The Girl From Ipanema—who was tall and tan and young and lovely just like  _someone_ —was downright depressing.

"A hunch, yes," she nodded, placing the notebook back on the shelf. There was no need to overanalyze the situation. She already understood everything. "Only a  _fool_  would be so blind to not see how much you fawn over her—or how you're so fond of her. As Wolowitz says; she's got you whipped. It's disheartening to think about it—if you consider all the time I've wasted…" She heaved a sad sigh of her own and continued, "so, I guess it means that I can go out on a date with someone… like Stuart?"

"Stuart?!" He squawked, looking affronted. "Why Stuart?"

She shrugged. She hadn't put much thought into this—she wasn't expecting the game to end so soon—and just jumped at the first name she had. The other day, while she was buying her Christmas gift for Sheldon at the comic book store, Stuart had (awkwardly) approached her and asked her if she wanted to go out on a date. She didn't say yes, nor did she say no, but she just left it just in case something like this would happen. But she had no intentions of actually going out with him.

"His awkwardness and self loathing is a pleasant change compared to your strong personality," she said, avoiding the questioning look that he was sending her. She wasn't lying through her teeth, but it was certainly far from the truth. She just needed some sort of diversion. "I must admit, though, it is quite painful to think that I have lost the fight. Right when you think that you have a strong lead, you find out that you weren't even in the competition."

He furrowed his eyebrows as he took another sip of tea, "what exactly are you talking about?"

"Me throwing in the towel."

"What does that have to do with my conundrum?"

For someone  _so_  smart, he could be incredibly dumb at times. The only way he'd understand what she was talking about—and for her to see if she even had a chance—was if she just went straight to the point. "Here, let's try this—and this is just me figuratively speaking, okay?" He nodded and she took a  _deep_  breath. "Would it be desirable for you and I to start a relationship?"

He hummed in thought, taking another sip of tea then scowled. "Why would we start a relationship? Aren't we already friends?"

Disheartening was no longer the word to describe what she was feeling.

She cleared her throat, struggling to hide the tremble in her voice. "Okay, uh, now, would it be desirable for you and Penny to start a relationship?"

His gaze dropped to his mug and she already knew what his answer was. She could tell by the way he became silent—Dr. Sheldon Cooper was never silent—that he had an answer, but he was still unsure (or was hesitating) with what he wanted to do with his conundrum. He was never good with making decisions like this. And with tears.

"I see. I assume that you have finally realized something quite paradigm altering. You've realized that what you used to consider as irrelevant—which in this instance, is the notion of a family—is actually something important. Am I right?"

Sheldon nodded, his expression a mixture of uncertainty and surprise. "Amy, I—I'm not good with tears."

She lifted a hand a hand to her eye and felt a tear forming. She didn't notice that she had shed a tear. How foolish! It wasn't as if this was the end of the world. As Bernadette told her during their last girl's night; there were plenty of fish in the sea. With Sheldon out of the picture, she could finally let loose and find someone who is a bit more dangerous than him. Opposites do attract. She could find a negative to her positive, too.

_Your beauty is beyond compare_

_With flaming locks of golden hair_

_With ivory skin and eyes of emerald green_

_Your smile is like a breath of spring_

_Your voice is soft like summer rain_

_And I cannot compete with you, Jolene_

_He talks about you in his sleep_

_There's nothing I can do to keep_

_From crying when he calls your name, Jolene_

_And I can easily understand_

_How you could easily take my man_

_But you don't know what he means to me, Jolene_

Dolly Parton was going to be her friend tonight; even if her bestie was nothing like that Jolene woman.

Well, Sheldon never really was hers and she had a feeling that Penny would have no problems with setting her up on a date with one of her friends, and neither would Bernadette. Maybe, Stuart was actually a better catch than he seems. Either way, things were going to be fine.

Those romance novels have really rubbed off on her. And not in the good way.

"I understand that," she nodded as all of the sadness she felt slowly disappeared. "In other news; I found this hysterical scientist wannabe who dumb's down Werner Heisenberg's uncertainty principle for the crowd—you'll think that you were in a comedy club."

* * *

Penny watched quietly as Bernadette started unpacking boxes in Howard's room and placing the items inside the closet. "So, how was the Honeymoon?"

Bernadette (who was looking kind of plump) giggled as she handed her the cutting knife for the other unopened boxes. "It was amazing! Hawaii is so beautiful and it was fun to see Howard trying—and failing—at surfing. His mom even rocked a tan."

"Mrs. Wolowitz was with you?"

"Yes, Howard said something about hearing his mom crying at night and he thought of taking her with us." The newlywed said, pulling a stack of shirts out of a box and placing it in the dresser. "She had her own room, but when we got there we found out that it was an adjoining one. Her sticking her nose into everything aside, it was really fun. I got all of you souvenirs! It's in that paper bag."

Penny moved to the table at the far side of Howard's room and opened the paper bag. "Wow, this is nice!" She grinned at the first she pulled out that was of a hula girl surfing. "I love it—and you even got some for the twins!"

Bernadette placed another bag in front of her and gestured for her to open it. "Actually, this entire bag is for the twins. You won't believe how  _many_  adorable kiddie clothes there were—but, Howard wouldn't let me buy all of them. So, I bought half."

"Thanks, Bernie," she gave her friend a hug before placing the shirts back into the bag. "The twins are really going to love these."

"It's nothing. So, how have you been? I've been gone for awhile."

Penny lifted another box from the floor and placed it on the bed. How Mrs. Wolowitz managed to convince Bernadette to move in with her, she'll never know. For months on end, Mrs. Wolowitz tried and tried and tried to get the two to move in with them but Bernadette said no every single time. Now, she and Bernadette were setting her things up while Howard and his mom fixed the guest room that Mrs. Wolowitz moved into after her 'little' accident with the treadmill.

It actually kind of felt odd how quickly things had changed. Just yesterday, she was dating Leonard and had just introduced Bernadette to Howard. Now, they were married and were moving into his mom's house—which, two years ago, Bernadette would never have agreed to. She wondered what was next. "Well, we shot our last scene for Hindsight, yesterday and it was pretty emotional. My character surrenders herself to the cops after she apologizes to her dad. I cried."

"That's beautiful!" Bernadette—who was suddenly crying—sniffed, sniffling against her arm. "I don't know the whole story, but based on the script and your stories, I bet it's going to be beautiful!" She blew her nose before placing a box on the floor. "How did it go with Collin? Didn't you say that you talked to him?"

She nodded, observing the various sci fi thingies that were hanging on Howard's wall. It made her think about the study room in her house that was now Sheldon's office-slash-collection room. He was so kind as to turn a third of that room into  _her_  work desk for scripts and whatever award she was going to win. It was better than Leonard's chair at the corner of the room. "It went well. I told him that they would stay as friends, regardless of the bad stuff that happened in the past. He's actually going out with this girl I set him up with. Happy ending for everyone."

"Yeah, I saw that on tv when Howie was switching channels," Bernadette said, placing a picture of their wedding on top of the dresser next to a model of the Millennium Falcon. Crap, how the hell did she know that?! Oh wait, that's the thing that's in their backyard. "He was on a date with some redhead who looked nice. He even said that the two of you were just friends and that they should stop spreading rumors about you."

Ah, that was exactly what she hoped for. Good thing that She was a great matchmaker, or else Collin would have done the Collin way of answering which was smiling when asked about her and further igniting rumors that they were together. Now, in the eyes of the public and the non conspiracists, she was finally single (as she has always been) and ready to… well, focus on her work without paps asking about some guy.

Which was actually a really good thing as she was getting really sick and tired of strange people (well, she was already familiar with some of the paps) bombarding her with the same thirty questions regarding who she was dating. Cause for some reason, it was impossible for someone to  _not_  be in a relationship in this industry. Especially if you're new in the business.

She had a feeling that this would happen all over again once she starts filming her next movie. Damn. "I know. When I saw that, I called him and thanked him for doing it. So far, no one has harassed me about Collin when I got coffee for the two of us. It's safe to say that I'll have some peace and quiet for about two months—that's when I shoot my next movie."

"That's great. And how is your relationship with Sheldon going?"

She glanced up to find Bernadette giving her a wide, teasing grin. Crap. She knew what that grin meant. It meant; come on, spill, I know that you like him so go on stop denying it. "Oh, stop smiling. You look like you're about to skin me alive."

"I'm sorry, I just like this topic," her friend said, giving her an innocent look that didn't suit her. "So, go on, spill. Tell me the truth—I can tell that you have something juicy to say with the way you sighed."

There was no use lying. Bernadette (like Bailey) could read her like an open book. It was a reason why the two were friends, and why they were her friends. Whenever she needed someone to fully understand her, she knew that she could always rely on the two B's. Sometimes, she reasons that it's because they can read her mind and can see her soul. Like psychics and card readers. Minus the cards.

Besides, she was getting tired of keeping it all to herself. No matter how scared she was of what was going to happen, it would be better if she told someone. She had a feeling that it would make her feel less agitated if she opened up to someone. God, when did Bernadette turn into the school guidance councilor that called her in whenever she had a new boyfriend? Bailey was probably the crabby principal who hated everyone.

She sighed and plopped down on the edge of the bed—which, had really smooth sheets. "As much as I'd love to say that there's nothing new, I gotta admit that having Sheldon around has been one big mess. I kinda regret ever inserting myself into his life."

Bernadette took a seat beside her, "regret?"

"Yup. You see, I was so okay with being a single mom that was strong and independent and was okay with having no man—as they often label me, but, I guess I'm not. When Sheldon wasn't in the picture, I knew that the three of us would be happy without him. Now, I know that he really cares and loves the twins, and he isn't a robot and can actually be nice—I don't think I'll be able to  _not_  have him around us."

The tiny blonde nodded, probably taking in what she said. "Oh, so you're in love with him." Bernadette bolted from her spot, swung the door open and popped her head out. "HEY, MA, PENNY JUST REALIZED THAT SHE'S IN LOVE WITH SHELDON! TELL HOWARD THAT HE OWES US MONEY!"

Penny winced at how Bernadette sounded just like the Wolowitz matriarch and opened her mouth to speak, but was cut off by the first Mrs. Wolowitz talking from downstairs. "I KNEW THAT SHE LIKED HIM! DID YA' SEE HOW THEY DANCED AT YOUR WEDDING? THEY LOOKED SO CUTE!"

"MA!" A male voice— _Howard_ —exclaimed, "WILL YA STOP YELLING? I CAN HEAR YOU ALL THE WAY FROM THE GARAGE!"

"WELL, I'M SORRY THAT I GOT TRAMPLED BY THAT THINGAMABOB THAT YOU CALL AN EXERCISE MACHINE AND AM UNABLE TO CLIMB THE STAIRS!"

"MA, HOWIE WILL YOU TWO CUT IT OUT!" Bernadette screamed (literally) causing Penny to wince, again. "PENNY'S GETTING SCARED, SO STOP YELLING! AND HOWARD, YOU OWE ME THREE HUNDRED BUCKS!"

"I KNOW!" Howard yelled back in response, "HEY, I'M GOING TO THE GROCERY STORE, YOU NEED ANYTHING?!"

"GET ME AND PENNY SOME DONUTS! EVERY GIRL'S TALK NEEDS SOME DONUTS!" Bernadette screamed, again. And when did every girl's talk need donuts?

"OKAY! I'LL BE BACK IN A BIT!"

Bernadette huffed and shook her head. "Wow, you guys are definitely doing everything backwards." She walked towards a stack of empty boxes and lifted them up, "Penny, take my advice; tell him. If my advice is not enough, why don't you call the possible in laws? I'm sure that they're dying to hear some progress. I gotta bring this downstairs or else  _someone's_  going to start yelling. I'll be right back." She smiled before she walked out of the room.

Penny stared at the doorframe for a moment and sighed; this was probably going to be the noisiest house on the block. Taking Bernadette's advice, she pulled her phone out of her pocket and dialed Missy's number.

"Penny!" Missy nearly screamed through the phone; her accent making her miss everyone in Texas. "It's about time ya' called! I'm so happy ya' called! How're things going with—"

There was a rattling noise and suddenly, she heard a second voice yelling in the background. "Missy! Is she callin' cause she finally realized that she's in love with our Shelly?!"

She pulled her phone away from her ear as Missy replied, "I don't know! She ain't said nothin' yet! Lemme talk to her first! How are we gonna tell that she's in love with Shelly if ya' won't let her speak to me?"

"It certainly would be nice if our dear Penny finally realized that," another voice—Meemaw's?—added. "I love Shelly and Penny togetha."

"Would you two quit it?" Missy snapped, causing the two women to grumble in the background. "So, hows it going? You finally realize that yer in love with my brother?"

There really was no point of denying it when everyone assumed she was. She would never be able to tell him if she couldn't admit it to someone else. She had no intentions of running around in circles, trying to avoid this. She was never one to be a coward. "Yes," she admitted with a small sigh, "I think I am."

She waited for any kind of negative reaction, but was met with a round of deafening cheers through the phone. She had a feeling that they'd be happy—with the way that they pressed her on her relationship with him—but she didn't expect such a happy response. Things were actually going well for her; she finally got it off of her chest and was met with everyone she told having a positive reaction.

"Ya' don't know how happy we are to hear that, Penny," Missy remarked and she could tell that the brunette was smiling by the tone of her voice. "Now, lemme guess, ya' don't know what to do with those feelins don't ya?"

Wow, maybe Bernadette and Bailey weren't the only ones who could see right through her. Or it was possible that she was just  _really_  easy to read. Though, if she was, then it wouldn't take a lot for Sheldon to see how she feels. Then again, he had zero social skills, so that had a fat chance of happening. "Yeah. It's really my biggest problem—I don't have a single clue on how I should do this."

"Penny, listen to me, okay?" She nodded. "Momma always says this, and I think that it's finally appropriate. Shelly is like a baby deer; you should let him come to you. Or else you'll spook 'em off. The three of us all know that Shelly likes ya—he just doesn't know what to do. But, who knows? Maybe, he's got everything all figured out. Meemaw said that her horoscope said that something  _big_  was going to happen. That might be it."

Sheldon didn't believe in astrology and horoscopes. He thought that they were hokum and that everyone who believed in them were silly; i.e. her. But, if it was from Meemaw, then that might be a good thing—cause everything about Meemaw was good. Seriously. She was a ray of sunshine that shined on all of them. "Thanks, I'll watch out for that big thing. I'll call you back when that 'thing' happens."

"Let us know first!" Missy chirped as Meemaw and Mary rambled in the background before she hung up. A big thing was about to happen. It could be a big good thing or a big bad thing. She was hoping for the former.

"Penny," Bernadette said, entering the room with another box, "there's something I want to tell you that I haven't told anyone, yet."

She raised an eyebrow and urged her to sit beside her, "yeah, what is it, Bernie?"

The microbiologist grabbed something from her pocket and lifted a tiny white box. "I'm pregnant!"

* * *

Sheldon stared in thought at his suitcase that was stuffed at the back of his closet.

_"Look, Sheldon, I never said that I was moving out. I was just thinking of moving out! Don't take it too seriously!"_

_He glared at his roommate and hissed, "I have already made up my mind, Leonard. I'm leaving with you."_

_"Sheldon, listen to me," Leonard demanded, standing up from his desk. "One; I'm not moving out, okay? I was just thinking about it. Two; will you stop running away? You won't solve anything by avoiding Penny. If you really think that the answer to your problems is you moving out, then fine. Go. Move out. Maybe then, you'll realize that you're acting like someone without your IQ."_

Leonard was just absolutely infuriating, provoking him like that. What if that was the only option he had? To move away and pretend that nothing happened? That didn't make him a coward, that made him someone who had a mind. That was rational thinking—for the greater good! It wasn't as if he was going to abandon his progeny and disappear!

No, he was just going to put a safe distance between him and the blonde. A distance far enough for him to realize that, no, he does not like Penny that way and that, ye, she is still their annoying neighbor that steals milk, freeloads on them and is nothing but trouble. That mindset got him through three whole years of  _not_  liking her, it could get him through at least another three more. That is, if she was steal any of the aforementioned traits.

Because a relationship with her was certainly too risky to try. Hypothetically speaking, what if she was still the annoying, milk stealing, freeloading, troublemaking neighbor (she wasn't but still) that he used to know? Or what if they have a relationship like her and Leonard's that was just destined to fail from the start? And she does whatever she did to Leonard to him and their friendship—or whatever relationship they had—would be ruined forever!

That would be absolutely disastrous to their progeny—which, was something he did not want, and was exactly what he was trying to avoid. A relationship with her was bound to end with multiple unwanted casualties that could be prevented if he just moves out and distances himself from that blonde enigma called Penny.

That was why he stayed away from things regarding relationships and the such! They were just too problematic, distressing and awful. Relationships destroyed friendships (his and Penny's during her and Leonard's breakup) personal lives (Howard being unable to hang out with them when he first dated Bernadette) and work— _something_  he was experiencing in the present. He couldn't handle  _any_  of those happening.

He picked the suitcase up, placed it on top of his bed and continued to stare at it. He had a plan; he was going to pack, say his goodbyes to Penny and the twins, leave with or without Leonard and stay overnight at an acceptable hotel while he looks for a suitable apartment. That was the plan. But somehow, he couldn't get himself to get clothes from his dresser and pack.

He actually couldn't do any of what he planned on doing. Somehow, he enjoyed this new home that he had. It was nice to have a big space all on his own—and it was nice of Penny to turn the study room into his personal office-slash-collection room. It was nice to be around the twins and maybe, just maybe, Penny and her unorganized ways—

What was he turning into?

"Hey, Sheldon, I have some donu—"

He felt his body go rigid at the sound of Penny's voice and he tightly closed his eyes. He didn't know how Penny would react at the idea of him moving out—even if he wasn't really moving out. He hadn't expected her to be back so soon. He hadn't thought that he wouldn't go through with his plan just because he (secretly) didn't want to leave the life he had finally gotten accustomed to.

He was turning into such a sap.

"What are you doing?"

Sheldon stayed still, hoping that she would just go away. "Leonard's been thinking of moving out, and I decided to go with him?"

He heard a shuffling noise and found her standing at the other side of the bed, staring at his suitcase, then up at him. "Why? Is there something wrong?"

Other than him submitting to what a person without an IQ of 187 does, no, there wasn't anything wrong. "Nothing. There's just just a time in everyone's life when you think about major life decisions." Now, he was copying what Leonard said. He was starting to get pathetic. "I thought; hey, this might be my time to think about it."

Penny furrowed her eyebrows, looking like she was about to say something before her expression changed into an unsure yet understanding one. "Oh. Yeah, you need to be independent some day, right? Like having a house of your own and stuff." There was something about the tone of her voice that sounded as if she was being sarcastic. "A future Nobel winner has to have a house. It would be bad for one to be living with some actress."

He ignored the accusing glare she sent him and placed a hand on the top of the suitcase. He hated confrontations. He was never good with those. He also wasn't good with tears, and he hoped that she wouldn't cry. "You may be right."

"Right?" She repeated with an irksome smile that screamed that she wasn't happy with the situation. He took a quick glance at her and saw that her expression dropped and she now had a small frown on her face. "Actually, don't go. The twins love having you around, and they'll be crushed if you leave them. And I'm going to miss you, too," she added and he sighed.

There it was. That stupid feeling he had whenever any of his blondes showed signs of tears. That little stab at his heart that grew even more painful with each second that passed. He was a fool. A gigantic fool that was too incredulously asinine to see that there was nothing he could do to solve his conundrum. Here goes nothing.

"Penny," he called, finally turning to face her. "There is something that I have to tell you."

The blonde crossed her arms and avoided his gaze, "yeah, what? You're really moving out."

Great, his intentions were misconstrued. Why was this so hard to do? "No. What I was going to say before you so rudely interrupted, was that for quite some time I've been troubled by something quite… befuddling. Something beyond me that I have never dealt with before." He shook his head at the thought, noticing that she was back to glaring at him, and continued. "I honestly do not understand why I am telling you this, but the longer I contemplate this, the more I realize that I am getting nowhere with this.

"For many, many, many years, I have trained myself to ignore certain common emotions that are beneath me. Some that are inevitable to most simpleminded people, but obviously preventable for me. Yet, here I am, troubled with such emotions simply because of one minor—or major, if you like to look at things at a certain way—change in my life that I had not expected to affect in me in any sort of way, until I disinterred the truth—"

Penny held up an impatient hand and effectively cut him off, much to his annoyance. "Look, cut to the chase. The twins are going to wake up from their nap, soon, and I'm sure that Leonard is hungry downstairs. I promised to bring him back the donuts if you didn't want some."

Sheldon inwardly grumbled and cursed his darn lack of confrontational skill. This would be easier if he had experienced this before; but he had not. And so, he would try to execute this as excellently as possible at first try. "What I was saying, was that I have recently found myself at a conundrum… and that conundrum is you." He took in a deep breath and saw her eyes widening at his revelation. "Ever since you've forcefully inserted yourself in my life, I've been confused and questioning things I never questioned before.

"I've realized that change is okay, and that living with other people is acceptable… and that the three of you mean much more to me than I ever thought you would." He winced at how that sounded—he didn't want to sound like a fool—and wished that he avoided all of this. "What I'm trying to say is that… Penny, it seems that there is a big possibility that I have developed deep affections for you. And I have no idea what to do with them."

Penny gawked up at him and he knew that he looked like a complete total idiot. "A possibility that you like me?"

He shook his head, "not a possibility. A certainty, and much more."

The blonde blinked—four times, not that he was counting—before a smirk appeared on her face. "Well, honestly, I also have developed deep affections for someone. Really deep."

"Oh, oh," he dumbly said, feeling his heart figuratively drop as he comprehended what she said. "I—I just assumed that a declaration of 'love' would do something. I guess I was wrong."

Penny shook her head as she walked up to him; placing her arms on his arms and smiling. "It's you… you whackadoodle." He gave her a look of confusion and surprise before she leaned forward to plant her lips on his, causing him to freeze to register what was happening before allowing her to invade his personal space  _this once._ Primarily because it seemed appropriate.

Leonard stood behind the door, smiling goofily as he watched (recorded on his phone) the scene in front of him. It would be creepy of him to admit that this was something he had been waiting for a long time, but it really was something he had been waiting for to happen. He ended the recording before clearing his throat and walking up to them, causing them to pull away, a bright pink hue running across both of their cheeks.

"Well it's about time!"

* * *

**The future; thirteen years later.**

* * *

Andy was blowing on a few strands of hair that hung above his head as he stood near the snack stand.

No matter how old his friend's son was, Andy was still the energetic, excitable toddler they knew and loved that somehow enjoyed doing simple things. Like blowing on his hair.

"Andy, what are you doing?" He asked, balancing an armful of snacks for the others.

"Oh hey, Uncle Raj, I'm waiting for mom to arrive." The tall blonde teenager gently took some of the food and walked with him back to their seats. "Maddie ordered me to wait for her. She'll get mad if I don't do as she says." Raj nodded; the two of them falling into a comfortable silence until they reached the spot where the others were sitting. "

"—no, didn't we agree that this was the right way of doing it?" Howard cried, barely tearing his gaze from Sheldon as he took the hotdog from Raj.

The Nobel laureate shook his head, "we did, but I believe that this a better way of doing it. Leonard, what do you think?"

Leonard shrugged, fumbling with his phone before he took the popcorn from Andy. "Amy texted me saying that she's going to be a bit late. Oh, an I already told you my suggestion—the rest is up to you."

Andy sent Raj a questioning look which the astrophysicist responded to by placing a finger on his lips. "It's a secret between the adults."

"But, I'm an adult!" The teenager whined, earning a chuckle from the adults. "Well, kinda—oh, hey, there's mom!" He handed his father the soda he was holding then trotted over to the entrance where the older blonde stood. They watched the two whisper to each other before Andy led Penny to where they were.

Raj glanced at Sheldon who had a small scowl on his face and sighed. It would be a lie to say that none of them didn't see it coming.

"Hey guys," the still youthful looking blonde greeted, "Sheldon."

The theoretical physicist glanced up, a hundred different emotions flashing across his face as he locked gazes with the blonde. "Hello, Penny."

How everything came to this, Raj didn't know. Just a second ago, everything was going so well, and now it was all ruined. They couldn't even bear to think about how the kids were dealing with this mess. He could tell by the way that the two uncomfortably greeted each other that it would take a lot for this to be fixed.

He settled into his spot beside Howard and saw the headline on the magazine that the person in front of him was reading.

_Penny Cooper allegedly cheated on her Nobel Laureate husband with costar! The truth behind their rumored divorce and more!_

Raj silently prayed to every single god out there that the two didn't see that. Things were bad enough as it already was.


	22. Five Tenths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A look into the daily life of babysitting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, this was so much harder to write that the first deleted scenes chapter. But, that's mainly because this also continues after the previous chapter and goes beyond it. This starts roughly after Chapter 12: Prolonged Encounters, but you don't really have to reread it.
> 
> Enjoy!

**#01 - Technology Isn't Baby Proof, You Idiot**

"—are you crazy? They're barely two! They can't handle something like that."

Sheldon clucked his tongue at his roommate and stepped away from the display. "My progeny are intelligent enough to understand this, Leonard. I'm sure that they'll love it."

Leonard stared at him with wide eyes, "how is a toddler going to enjoy playing with a PSVita or a 3DS? They're just going to throw it at the wall!"

"You're underestimating the twins, Leonard—ah, why don't we test it out?" The theoretical physicist took the DSi that the employee showed him and approached a child that looked like he was about five. "Why hello there, friend, have you ever tried playing with a Nintendo DS?"

"You look like a pedophile—stop that!" Leonard rushed over to where his roommate and the child were standing, looking around to see if anyone had found them suspicious. "We're gonna get banned."

"Be quiet." Sheldon threw him a glare before turning back to the child who was staring at the bright blue DS in his hands. "So, do you wanna try playing Mario? Or maybe Legend of Zelda?"

The young boy blinked, gingerly taking the handheld console before dropping it to the floor and laughing innocently.

"Does that answer your question?" Leonard hissed as he pulled out money from his wallet to pay for the broken DS.

"Maybe, maybe not. That's not my progeny, we'll never—those car things look nice! Let's go check them out!"

* * *

**#02 - Old Habits Die Hard**

Sheldon warily eyed the annoying intruder who was lounging on the beige arm chair,  _mooching_  off of them. As if said intruder couldn't pay for food. An annoying neighbor.

"You don't know know how much I missed eating Chinese food," the intruder which he called 'Penny' said with a mouthful of rice. This was the seventh time (since she got back) that she ate dinner with them without a single warning whatsoever that she would hog their resources. "It's so great to be back."

"Andy happy dat Mommy back," Andy remarked, stabbing his chopstick (singular) in a potsticker. The twins loved potstickers—the steamed ones, as Penny specifically said no fried food. "Andy missed Mommy. Wots!"

Maddie nodded, unhygienically grabbing a potsticker—she got this from her mother—and shoving it in her mouth. "Dat twue," she swallowed and offered her a potsticker, "potstikah?"

Yes, it must be great to be back and have everyone (except him) at her beck and call. They may be friends, but clearly she had crossed a line when she took the last dumpling—which, was rightfully his. The nerve. "Don't gorget to wipe your hands." He sent the twins a knowing look and the happily nodded in response, grabbing their respective napkins and wiping their tiny hands on it. "Penny, it has come that to my attention that you keep spontaneously appearing for dinner."

Penny raised an eyebrow before taking a sip of her water, "that I do."

"Why?"

"Cause I miss mooching off of you," she shrugged, placing the bottle on the coffee table and grabbing another potsticker from the twins' dinner. Good thing that Leonard was out on a date or else they'd have problems on what his roommate would eat with the way Penny was scarfing down the takeout. Maddie did that, too. "That, and cause I really miss messing with you. It's not a fun dinner until you get the trademark 'you are all beneath me' look from you."

He pulled a face and she laughed. "That's the one! God, you'll never know what you missed until you experience it yourself."

"Is that even a saying?"

"Sheldon being condescending—check!" She made a small check mark in the air and grinned down at the twins. "That's another one on the list. This night is getting better and better!"

So, so,  _so_  annoying.

* * *

**#03 - The Pasadena Tea Party Version 1.24667**

"Fuhst tings fuhst; ebwi-one say hi!"

"Hello."

"I don't understand why we must  _again_  partake in this—ow! Must you both hit me?"

"Didn't I tell you not to be condescending the first time?"

"Hey, I didn't hit you. My elbow slipped."

"Really Penny?!"

"Quiet!" Maddie exclaimed, eyeing both Sheldon and Penny. "No talk when Maddie no done, yet." She cleared her throat—something she must have picked up from Raj—and repeatedly tapped her plastic spoon against her Disney Princess themed teacup. "Okay, we gots a new membah! Maddie gonna intah-duce ebi one," she gestured to her mother and grinned, "dis Mommy! Mommy say hi."

Penny—who was playing along—waved, "I'm Penny and I just got back from France. Nice to meet all of you."

Andy, Howard, Leonard and Raj all waved while Sheldon snorted. "As if we aren't aware of this alrea—ow!"

"This time, that was on purpose!" sneered Penny, glaring at the theoretical physicist.

"Assault! That was was obviously an act of physical assault!" Sheldon turned to Andy who looked confused, "get me a lawyer—quick! We'll sue your mother for all she has and ruin her reputation!"

Andy exchanged confused glances with Maddie then turned back to him, "wat a wah-yah?"

"Well, this is fun," Raj happily commented, taking a sip of actual tea mixed with a little whiskey. "We're all comfortable with each other, now."

Leonard stared at him as if he was crazy, "you're kidding, right?"

Howard tapped a finger on his chin as Sheldon and Penny continued arguing, "you know, this kind of reminds me of those support group things. I should've brought Bernadette along."

* * *

**#04 - Friends Help Friends**

"Did you see the news about Penny?"

"I know! So, it was the tall guy!"

"I can't believe we never realized it."

"But, isn't she dating Collin Harris?"

"Could it be publicity?"

"She might be doing it for more fame!"

"How unethical."

Furrowing her eyebrows in irritation, (smiling) Brenda excused herself from the person she was speaking to and made her way to the three parents who were gossiping about her good friend (and possibly the nicest, sweetest and most down to earth celebrity out there) Penny. "Mrs. Whitbaker, Mrs. Owens and Miss Jackson, nice to see you all."

"Good morning to you, too, Brenda," Miss Jackson greeted with a smile. "How was your weekend?"

"Well, I just came back from a seminar yesterday that discussed about topics that we should and shouldn't discuss in front of our children. It's a very important aspect to watch what we say, you see."

Mrs. Whitbaker nodded with interest, "oh that does sound interesting! Is it okay if you tell us one of the no nos so that we can avoid doing it?"

"Of course," (smiling) Brenda smiled, "I'll tell you the number one no on; gossiping." The color drained from the three mothers' faces and the redhead mentally smirked. "Apparently, if the child is exposed to gossip at an early age, he will become less trustful and eventually, insouciant to others due to the possibility of the negativity that gossip brings triggering a part that causes a person to be cynical. It's very sad."

Mrs. Owens gulped—looking as if she had done such a crime—and glanced at her one year old son who was playing with a xylophone beside her. "Oh, wow, yeah, that sounds bad."

Mission accomplished. "It is—now, if you'll excuse me," she gave them another smile before heading back to the far part of the lobby where the person she was talking to was waiting at. "Sorry about that. I don't condone any type of bad mouthing—and false accusations—as I believe that it is a type of bullying."

"It's nothing, I don't find anything wrong with it." The blonde actress chuckled, waving her hand dismissively. "Besides, I'm used to it—paparazzi and all. So what were you saying about this daycare's sister school?"

* * *

**#05 - Imaaaaaginaaatiooon**

It all started when he foolishly asked the twins what they wanted to do as he was generous like that.

"Maddie wanna be a pwincess!" The toddler declared, placing a crown (that came out of nowhere) on her head. "Andy da dwagon. Sedon da hewo dat wes-coos da pwincess!"

Andy crossed his arms as he pouted, "why Andy da dwagon? Andy wanna be da knight!"

"Sedon da knight!" Maddie corrected, handing Sheldon a plastic sword (which also came out of nowhere) and draping her red blanket over his shoulder. "Andy no knight."

Sheldon stared in confusion as the twins started setting up random items around their playpen, making a tent of some sort. "What is that supposed to be?"

"Did da cah-sel!" Maddie placed a blue blanket on the floor and stretching it to both ends of the playpen. "Dis da moat, and Andy making da bwidge!"

He had to give it to the two toddlers; their imagination was certainly outstanding for a pair of one year olds. They must have got it from him. "Are you done? The hero has other princesses to save."

Andy glanced over his shoulder, pausing in making the bridge. "Wike Mommy?"

Well, he  _did_  save their mother once—when she slipped and fell in her tub. She was no princess, but that was still considered as him saving someone. He would never ignore the please of a damsel in distress; even if it was an imaginary case. "Yes… it seems that I have saved her. So, that's a yes."

"Dis done!" The 'princess' pointed to the bridge, tossing a cap in the shape of a dragon. "Ah! Da dwagon gonna eat da pwincess!" She gasped loudly before running behind the 'cahsel.'

The 'knight' pulled his best intimidating face and started stomping in front of the imaginary castle. "Woooh! Andy a dwagon! Gonna eat da pwincess!"

"Pwease save me!" cried the princess, "da pwincess need a hewo dats a knight, too!"

Two pairs of blue eyes turned to him—waiting for him to do his role—and he sighed.

"I am Sir Sheldor of Pasadenia—I am here to save the princess!"

* * *

**#06 - Life As We Know It**

"Penny, I am telling you, go to university."

"What? I can do what I want. I'm not going to university!"

"You don't understand; going to university will be much better."

"Ah, my life, my choices—I'm going to skip it and start working."

Sheldon snorted as Leonard held out the LIFE cards that Penny would choose from. "This is a bigger mistake than you going as a boy."

Penny threw him a glare before pulling out a card and scowling. "Damn, I got salesperson with 30,000." Sheldon snickered and she hissed, "laugh all you want but you're gonna lose in the end."

Raj, Leonard and Sheldon all chose to go to university, and the game of LIFE started.

Sheldon was the first to graduate. "I am  _winning_."

"Dude, it took an  _hour_  for you to deal with a flat tire," Raj pointed out, "if that's the definition of 'winning,' then you're doing it wrong."

Leonard took a career card from Raj, "I'm surprised that he even  _has_  a car. Someone should get that car away from him. Darn, I'm an athlete. That's bad for my asthma."

"A teacher?!" Sheldon hissed, looking affronted at his choices. "What am I? A clown?"

The blonde scoffed, "hey, that's 70,000 more than I make. You should stop whining."

"Well, you could've had a choice if you went to university—ow!"

"Aww! I landed on make new friends!" Raj groaned, "this is too much peer pressure!"

"I'm getting married," Penny stated with surprise, "I didn't even know that I was dating someone. Hmm."

Andy's eyes widened as he turned to his mother, "Mommy gonna get mawwied?!"

"To Daddy?" Maddie gasped.

"No, you're mother is playing as a boy, so she's marrying a woman." Penny sent Sheldon a murderous glare. "Violence is not an answer, Penny."

"I'm going to be a teacher with a salary of 100,000," Leonard grinned, happy with what he got.

Sheldon snorted, "you? Making more money than me? I bet you're 'teaching' alright."

Leonard raised an eyebrow, "are you insinuating that I'm doing something illegal?"

The theoretical physicist hummed, "I'm not insinuating anything."

"I'm getting married!" Raj exclaimed happily before noticing what else was written "wait—why am I getting married in a car?! That's not my ideal wedding—that's not even romantic!"

"If Penny is buying furniture and has to pay the salesperson," Sheldon started, peering over the blonde's shoulder to see the card, "would she be paying herself or is she stealing?"

Penny scoffed, "why would I be stealing?"

"Don't ask me—it's  _your_  card!"

"And I'm probably buying furniture for my new house that isn't mentioned, but I'll mention it anyway." Raj said, moving his car to Penny's square. "Ooh, car crash. Should I pay Penny, or should she pay me?"

Leonard stared at the two cars side by side on the square. "A car crash?"

"That's an accident," Sheldon agreed, clucking his tongue at the irritated blonde sitting beside him, "Penny, this is obviously your fault, pay him."

"And… I'm off to visit the in laws," Raj said, reading the card. "Wait, who did I marry again?!"

"I just bought a… farmhouse," Penny said with little enthusiasm, "well, that sucks."

"Perfect for growing corn—ow! Penny must you really hit me?!"

Raj sighed, "I just got fired. This might mean that I'm going back to India—wait, now Im an artist! I'm staying!"

Sheldon stared incredulously at his card, "I got married. And now I have twins—a boy and girl." Both Maddie and Andy cheered.

Penny snorted, "the game's right about one thing."

"My house got flooded," Leonard said with a small sigh, "i knew that I should've got that insurance."

Sheldon snickered.

"I'm running for mayor," Penny announced, "vote for Penny—"

"I'm not voting for you," Sheldon flatly said, moving his car and causing a blue son peg to fall out. "drat."

Raj gasped, "why would you let Andy fall put of the car?!"

Leonard frowned, "told you Sheldon having a car was bad."

"I can't believe you allowed our son to fall out of your car!"

"It slipped!"

" _It?!_ "

"I found treasure!" Raj grinned. "I'm rich!"

"Why do I have to pay 25,000 for tennis lessons?" Leonard whined. "All these sports is gonna kill me."

"I'm rich, want me to buy you an inhaler?"

"Sheldon won the Nobel Peace Prize!" Penny happily exclaimed, patting his shoulder. "Congratulations, sweetie!"

"That's an insult," Sheldon huffed, picking another card. "And now I'm having a midlife crisis. Great." He scowled at the laughing blonde. "I blame you for this."

"Burglars just broke into my house," Raj dryly said, "and apparently, the logical way of responding is to pay my taxes. The IRS hates me. There goes my treasure…"

"I went on a vacation and now I'm retired," Penny titled her head in confusion, furrowing her eyebrows at the card. "Am I  _that_  old?"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow, "you make the least among us; why would you be the one to retire first?"

Penny glared at him in response, "get off my case, or else, Sheldon."

Leonard whistled, earning a look from Sheldon, "I went fishing and am retiring in the next turn. Wow, I did a lot of physical activities. Go me."

Raj looked mournfully at his salary card before handing it over. "I'm retired and am sponsoring an art exhibit. Do I even have money for that?"

"I'm going on a luxury cruise for my retirement," Sheldon said with distaste, "why would I retire?"

Penny hummed, "can I retire with you? A luxury cruise sounds great!"

"Don't you have a game husband?" asked Leonard.

Raj dramatically gasped, "Penny's game cheating!"

"Infidelity's frowned upon, Penny, please don't drag me into this."

"Oh shut up!"

"Everyone count your money and life cards," Raj instructed, gathering his cards, "975,00."

"1,600,000," Sheldon proudly announced.

"1,200,000," Leonard told them, shocked that he made so much.

Penny chuckled—maniacally, according to Raj—before placing her cards down. "1.900,000! I'll go on my own luxury cruise!"

The three scientists all looked at each other before quietly putting the game back. "We're never playing this game again," Sheldon said, "it lets Penny cheat and win. That's the reason why I'm not voting for her."

"Whatever. I still won. Hey, let's play Cluedo, next!"

* * *

**#07 - It Says Fragile**

"Mom, Missy!" Junior called, balancing a box of cake on one arm and a box of pizza on the other, "I got something for ya!"

"We're fixin' yer brother's room!" Mary called from the hall. "Just put it down on the coffee table! But be careful—yer brother's toy is there!"

"Got it!" He carefully placed the boxes on the table and grinned. It had been nearly two days since his brother visited and now their mom was missing him badly. She kept sitting in his room and reminiscing about the good old days. That, or she was doing something that has to do with Sheldon getting together with Penny—

_CRASH!_

Junior turned around and saw what he had accidentally bumped.

The Lego Death Star.

Sheldon was goin' to kill him.

* * *

**#08 - Intruder Alert**

"—everyone here is just," Sheldon paused, squinting his eyes to see who had just entered the party grounds and was making his way towards them. "Is that Kripke?!" He bolted up from the table as the (annoying) plasma physicist reached their table, holding a gift under each arm. "Kripke, what are  _you_  doing here?"

Kripke—who was in a rather unfitting monk costume—smirked, placing the presents on top of the table. "Weww, hewwo to you, too, Coopah. I know you'we suwpwised that I'm hewe, so… suwpwise!"

"People without invitations aren't allowed inside," Amy informed, looking for Kripke's invitation, "how exactly did you get in?"

"Typicaw, you'd think that I wouldn't have an invitation, but," Kripke lifted the end of his costume and took out a rolled up scroll before tossing it to Raj. "Thewe it is. Woxanne and the spwouts gave it me when they wewe at the univewsity to settwe something fow the pawty, and they gave me an invitation. I'm pwetty huwt that Woxanne would invite me and you wouldn't, Coopah, especiawwy how we'we such good fwiends."

"We're not friends, and I have no control on who Penny wants to invite as she was the one who organized this party. I'm not happy about you being here, but seeing as you have a gift," Sheldon gestured to the brightly colored boxes, "I will not press more into it. What are those?"

Kripke raised his eyebrows and glanced at the boxes, "uh, toys. I didn't know what I was suppose to buy a two yeaw owd, so I just got them those Wego Dupwo bwocks. I was going to buy them those Wego sets, but choking hazawds."

Amy sidled to Raj, whispering, "did you understand anything he said?"

Raj shrugged, "I got the toys part, but everything went downhill after that."

"Thoughtless gifts, but acceptable nonetheless. The gift table is over there by the stage, bring it there and don't forget to add your name." Sheldon pointed to a table filled with tons of boxes and gestured for Kripke to leave, "go on. Stop bothering me."

Kripke picked up the boxes and grinned, "you'we a bit too gwumpy, but since it's youw chiwdwen's biwthday I'm gonna wet it swide. Awesome pawty, though. See ya." He waved at them before trotting over to the gift table to put the boxes.

"Why Penny even considered inviting him, I'll never know," Sheldon muttered, "now, back to what I was saying…"

* * *

**#09 — Sweet Hunting**

"Daaaaaddy, cake."

"Dat cake?"

"No, Maddie, that's not cake. That's a present."

"Pwesent?"

"Suhpwise cake?"

"A present isn't a surprise cake, Andy."

"Dat a cake?"

"No, that's a cage covered with a blanket from your magic show.

"Dat a cake?"

"That's a turkey. I'm not even sure if they had cake in the timeframe that your mother chose."

"Oh! Dat a cake?"

"No, Andy that's—let's just go find your mother."

* * *

**#10 - I Don't Remember That Happening**

Stuart looked up from his stack of comic books when Sheldon and Penny entered his store. This was the first time he saw Penny since… well, since that bowling game between them and Wil Wheaton where she and Leonard (kinda) broke up.

He never really realized just how beautiful she was, and how he was lucky to have went out with her—albeit for a short, short,  _short_  time. How many people could say that they dated a really famous celebrity? Okay, so not everyone believed him when he said that, but he knew that it happened.

"Hi Sheldon, hi Penny, what brings you here at this time?"

The two (were they a couple? He wasn't really updated with his friends' personal lives) sent each other a hostile look before Penny approached the counter. " _Someone_  here just  _has_  to stop by and buy a comic book because he, supposedly, won't be able to work unless he gets it off his mind."

Sheldon snorted as he scanned the 'vintage comic books' rack. "It's not a supposition, it's a certainty. I won't be able to concentrate on my work until I see the comic book, but don't mind me. I'll find it soon enough."

Penny rolled her eyes, "yeah right. So, Stuart, how are you?"

Was this some sort of second chance thing? "Uh, I'm fine. Still running the comic book store. Hey, this is gonna sound creepy but, do you remember when w—"

"I'm done!" Sheldon exclaimed, striding towards Penny and scowling. "It seems that Raj is right and I owe him money. Let's go." He shook his head and exited the shop, grumbling the entire time.

"Well, that's my cue," she tapped the glass and flashed him a smile, "let's catch up sometime, Stuart. See ya." She widened her grin before following Sheldon out, hissing something inaudible to him once she caught up to him.

"I just wanted to ask if you remember that we dated…" he stared longingly at the door and sighed. Even if she did, she was probably too infatuated with Sheldon to care.

… and they didn't even buy anything.

* * *

**#11 - AU : What if Penny never told anyone about the twins?**

"I was told that you're one of the best and brightest of this university's doctoral candidates," Sheldon started, reading over the new grad student's documents. "I must admit it  _is_  pretty impressive. How old are you, again?"

The somewhat familiar blue eyed blonde gave him a small smile, "I'm about to turn nineteen in November."

Certainly impressive. This girl was obviously going to be a great asset to the university—and she was going to be a theoretical physicist, no less! There was hope for humanity after all. "I see. It says here that you graduated from Stanford, why is that you chose to take your doctorate here? Surely there are several other universities who tried to get you to enroll at their school."

The girl— _Maddie_ —raised an eyebrow, "Caltech really isn't my first choice, but my mom said that I'd regret not going here. My twin brother is also taking up his masters in engineering here—also per our mother's suggestion."

"Well, both your mother and President Siebert is right. The university would be happy to have you," he calmly stated, glancing at her school records. Graduated high school at fifteen as salutatorian and at Stanford with highest honors. Siebert wasn't laying when he said that she was a remarkable child. The only thing odd about her was her last name… "Congratulations and welcome to Caltech. You will attend my class and I will personally guide you through the university as ordered by the president."

The blonde grinned and reminded him of Penny. It had been nearly twenty years since he had last saw her, and he couldn't help but wonder where she was now. Leonard had long forgotten about her and now she was just an old memory to them. "Thank you, Dr. Cooper, it would be an honor to be taken under your wing for the time being. I've read all about your work and I must say; I am a big fan. I skipped school just to watch your Nobel speech—my mom got mad, but she eventually understood my reason. You're actually the reason why I want to be a physicist."

Ah, the impact he made on the youth. He didn't care much about them, but it was fascinating to see that his work had allowed hundreds of children around the world to try to be even a fourth of the scientist he was. "It's humbling to know that I influenced you in some way." He closed her folder and placed it in his drawer before standing up, "would you care for me to show you around, now?"

She politely shook her head and stood. "I'm afraid that I have to decline. I'm meeting my brother in a bit, then our mom is going to pick us up. But, will it be alright if I get the tour, tomorrow?"

"Of course, I see no problem with that," he opened the door for her and offered her a small smile, "I will see you tomorrow."

Maddie nodded then exited his office. He quietly watched her meet up with a tall blonde boy—probably the twin brother she was talking about—who was waiting for her at the end of the hall. She started saying something to her twin before pointing straight at him. Her twin (who looked a bit like her) grinned at him before approaching him, "Dr. Cooper, hi—I'm Andy, Maddie's twin brother and I just wanted to apologize in advance for anything bad that my sister does."

"Hey!" Maddie hissed, elbowing her twin in his side. "I'm sorry Dr. Cooper—he says the stupidest things."

He let out a small chuckle as he shook his head. They reminded him greatly of him and Missy when they were younger, except a bit more pleasant. "I understand, I have an annoying twin of my own."

Andy's eyebrows rose and Sheldon noticed that he had green eyes. The only person he knew with green eyes was Penny. "Oh, you have a twin, too! Cool. It's nice to meet someone who understands the life of having a twin."

"You have green eyes," Sheldon pointed out as an image of Penny flashed in his mind. "Or are those considered as hazel?"

The teen grinned, nodding happily while his twin glared at him. "No, my ares are green—they're actually my mom's. Maddie got hers from our dad."

"Dr. Cooper wasn't asking, bother."

"And I see nothing wrong in saying in it, blister."

He briefly wondered if any of their friends had kept in touch with the blonde. "Ah. It's alright—it's just rare for me to see green eyes. Anyway, I'll leave you two be. It's nice meeting you Andy, and I'll see you tomorrow morning, Maddie."

"See ya, Dr. Cooper!"

"Bye, Dr. Cooper!"

He quietly walked back to his office and returned to working on his paper. Somehow, seeing those two blondes made him want to see his former neighbor.

He might call her after work—if he manages to find her number.

* * *

**#12 - Brought To You By the Letter O**

"Penny, our reason for going here today is to look for formalwear. We've done that—why are we still here?"

"Who says that we can't shop for something else? Lighten up and I'll get you anything you like."

"This is the children's section, Penny. I strongly doubt that there will be an item that will fit me."

"I didn't mean that—oh forget it. Wouldn't this look great on Maddie?"

Andy grinned to himself as he and his twin wandered through the aisle full of beds. He loved listening to their parents talking—they always sounded kinda mad at first then they get all happy and nice. He just really loved seeing Mommy and Daddy together.

"Andy, wook!" Maddie repeatedly tapped his shoulder and pointed to something at the end of the aisle.

It was a  _duck_  shaped bed!

"Dat mine!" He yelled, rushing towards the bed before his twin could get to it. "Dibs!"

Maddie quickly scrambled after him, reaching the bed after a few seconds. "What?! Maddie saw it fuhst! My dibs!"

"No, mine!"

"Mine!"

"Dis mine!"

"No, dis mine!"

"Hey, what are you two fighting about?" Mommy asked, carrying an armful of clothes while Daddy trudged behind her. "We could hear you all the way from there."

"Maddie want dis bed!"

"No, Andy want da bed!"

Daddy and Mommy shared a look before Mommy handed (shoved) the clothes to Daddy and crouched down. "Don't you already have a nice bed?"

He shook his head, patting the surface of the bed while Maddie tried to scoot him off of it. "But Mommy, dis da duck!"

Maddie nodded, "da duck's beak is owange!"

"Sheldon, what are they talking about?" Mommy asked, standing up.

Daddy scowled, "if I knew, we'd have understood their love for ducks and their orange colored beaks. Have I ever told you about the time that they fought over a crayon?"

"Oh yeah… what was that about?"

* * *

**#13 - How Old Are You Again?**

"Noooo! Leonard help me!"

"Sheldon—I can't! He's right there!"

Penny raised an eyebrow as she closed the front door with one hand and balanced a bag of groceries in the other. She had just returned from work (and a quick stop at the grocery store) when she was met by screaming coming from the second floor. It must be Sheldon and Leonard playing online.

"He's going to kill me!"

"I can't—he'll attack me—"

_THUMP!_

"Owowowowow!"

"Buddy, are you okay?"

"I'm hurt—he's about to hit me!"

Instinctively, Penny placed the bag on the table, grabbed a baseball bat—that was efficiently placed in the closet—and dashed up the stairs. She had a bad feeling when she saw that most of the lights were off—there was always a possibility of an intruder breaking in and harming the boys.

"Oh my god, I'm going to die!"

"Somebody help!"

The screams came from the bathroom and she scurried there, bat ready to swing at the a-hole who even dared to hurt her friends.

"This is what you get for hurting my—" she kicked the door open, "—friends?"

In the shower was Leonard who was backed up to the wall, Sheldon who was holding his knee on the floor and one…

… big daddy longlegs spider.

Geniuses her ass.

* * *

**#14 - You Should Do That, Too**

Maddie happily watched as Daddy, Uncle Howard, Uncle Leonard and Uncle Raj all stood in front of everyone—with their superhero shirts exposed—and singing the pretty song that Uncle Howard made for Auntie Bernadette.

"If I didn't have you, life would be blue, I'd be Dr. Who without the Tardis—"

"This is sweet," Auntie Bailey said to Mommy, "sickeningly sweet… but sweet, nonetheless."

Mommy nodded, smiling goofily at Auntie Bernadette who was sitting in front of Uncle Howard. "I know! And to think that it came from Howard."

"I'm guessing that that's a compliment," Auntie Amy said, watching Daddy and the other sing.

"—if I didn't have you, life would be dreary,I'd be string theory without any string—"

Suddenly, Daddy started playing the piano while Uncle Howard walked up to Auntie Bernadette and danced with her.

"Daddy pways da piano?" Andy asked Mommy. He always asked the silliest questions—of course he could, because Daddy was amazing!

Mommy hummed, probably thinking before smiling. "Yeah, he does. He plays really well, actually."

"Ah, how romantic," Auntie Bailey (she must be so impressed that Daddy was so great at everything!) said to Mommy who raised an eyebrow. "What a keeper."

"You're being sarcastic, aren't you?" Mommy shook her head at Auntie Bailey and Maddie wondered what 'sarcastic' meant.

Auntie Bailey grinned, "I am, nice of you to notice, blondie!"

"—from the moment, that we met you, Bernadette."

Uncle Howard gave Auntie Bernadette a kiss and everyone started clapping. She and Andy did, too, because Uncle Howard was a great singer. He was even better than Mommy!

Daddy walked back to their table and returned to his seat next to her. "That was embarrassing."

Auntie Amy smiled, "I beg to differ. Howard truly is a surprising man. Who would've thought that he could be sweet?"

Mommy sighed, shoving a handful of peanuts in her mouth that made Daddy shake his head. "I know right? It makes you wonder if you ever really knew Howard. It's rare to find someone like that."

No, it wasn't. Daddy could probably do that, too! Turning to face Daddy, she tugged on his sleeve. "Daddy sing to Mommy, too?"

"Mommy gonna wike Daddy singing," her brother agreed for once. Daddy would probably be  _way_  better than Uncle Howard. Uncle Howard was great—especially cause he made lots of cool things—but Daddy was greater. And taller. There was no doubt that Daddy would make Mommy really happy if he sang to her.

Daddy's eyebrows rose as he turned to Mommy who was quietly drinking her wine. "Um," Daddy glanced at Uncle Leonard then back at them. "I'll sing for your mother when she wants me, too. Right, Penny?"

"I don't know…" Mommy said, tapping a finger on her chin, "maybe, I  _would_  like for you to sing to me. I have a few song suggestions, though. I'd like Livin' La Vida Loca or You're Still the One or Wait For You. I love old songs."

Auntie Bailey raised a hand, "I suggest She Bangs or Sex Bomb. Those are definitely appropriate—you don't have to glare at me like that Penny."

"Isn't She Lovely and Hopelessly Devoted To You would surely suit my bestie," Auntie Amy said, happy with her suggestion.

Daddy frowned, "I don't know any of those songs."

She didn't either, but as long as Daddy kept his promise that he'd sing for Mommy one day, she would be happy.

It would probably happen soon, anyway.

* * *

**#15 - Not On My Watch, You Won't**

"And now for the throwing of the bouquet!"

"Dude," Raj started, taking a sip of wine as the women lined up in front of Bernadette, "did you know that whoever catches the bouquet—supposedly—will be the next one to get married?"

Sheldon glanced up from fixing Andy's clothes (which got wrinkled when he followed Leonard to the garter catching portion) and scowled. "And?"

The astrophysicist shrugged, "you know… marriage?" Sheldon stared blankly at him. "It's nothing really, I just thought that you'd like to know."

"I'm not sure what gave you the impression that I cared, but fine. You can never be too smart."

Andy nodded in agreement then looked up at him, "cake, pwease?"

"Your mother said no more cake, so no more cake," Sheldon firmly said as the boy pouted. Penny would kill him if he went against her food plan for the twins. He twisted his body and saw Bernadette turning around and throwing the bouquet to the swarm of women behind her. Minus Bailey who was playing The Legend of Zelda across from him on her DS.

There were several shrieks (squeals, screams, you name it) as they fought for the bouquet that was nowhere to be found. They looked like they were trying to kill someone with the way that the compressed and searched for the flowers. The whole act seemed so foolish that only a fool would get the bouquet—

"Maddie got da bo-kay!"

Sheldon's head snapped towards the women as Penny lifted Maddie who was clutching the bouquet as if her life depended on it.

_"…will be the next to get married."_

Remembering what the astrophysicist said, he bolted from his seat and rushed over to where the two blondes stood. He quickly took Maddie from Penny, pried the bouquet from her hand before shoving the flowers to Penny.

"Are you alright?" Penny asked with a small confused (and amused) smile.

"Apparently, catching the bouquet means that you will be the next to get married," he stated with a huff before turning to his daughter who looked just as confused as her mother. "But you," he gave her his best 'listen or else' look, "you're not getting married until you're fifty."

Maddie simply stared up at him in his response and he felt that she got the point. She also was not allowed to date men (especially ones like Wolowitz!) until she was forty-nine and won seven Nobel prizes. "Maddie caught da bo-kay."

"And won't get married, right, Penny?"

The blonde handed Amy (who was more than happy to get it) the bouquet and followed him back to the table. "She will, eventually."

He snorted. "Not on my watch."

"Okaay," Penny grinned, returning to her seat beside him. "Can Andy get married?"

Sheldon glanced at Andy who was staring longingly at Penny's half eaten piece of cake. His son was still a toddler! Albeit, a very intelligent one, but still a child. He was either going to be a male counterpart of their mother or immune to such thins like he was.

"We'll see."

* * *

**#16 - Parallel Universe**

It all started when Bernadette brought up the topic of comic books. The guys obviously love them, and it always made them wonder what was so great about it. The guys even had hour long debates on whether or not Spiderman should have webbing in his armpits, and that was what made them tag along to comic book night.

And so it began…

"I like the Flash," Amy said, flipping through a Flash comic book, "he's hot."

Penny peered over her new comic book and snorted. Thanks to Sheldon, she knew  _a lot_  about the Flash. "Which Flash? Jay Garrick or Barry Allen or Wally West?"

The neuroscientist looked shocked, "there's more than one?"

Bernadette snickered, still focused on her Avengers comic book."Quicksilver is  _way_  better than the Flash. Not only is there just one of him, he can also travel to the future. He even won the lottery by jumping into the future and getting the winning numbers—now, that's a superpower."

"Isn't that cheating?" Amy asked.

"It is, but you do what you can when your twin sister changes reality and you find out that your wife and daughter isn't part of that," the microbiologist simply said, flipping a page. "It's both tragic and a big  _in your face_  at the same time."

Penny raised an eyebrow, "how do you know that?"

Bernadette sniffed, "I was bored and I saw Howard's X-Men  _and_  Avengers collection, and I found it interesting how he was in both. The House of M was a very interesting arc, to be honest."

"Well, whatever, the Flash is the fastest man alive," Amy nonchalantly said, grabbing another Flash comic book, "I'm sure he can run circles around this Quicksilver person."

That was when Penny felt that something in Bernadette snapped.

"Quicksilver is the son of a very powerful villain—what can you say about the Flash?"

"It's better to be struck by lightning than a son of a monster."

"Please, the only thing the Flash can do is run. Run and run and run."

"Isn't that exactly what Quicksilver does?"

"Yes, he runs, but he also jumps into the future and slows down time. And if you're a mutant that lost your powers, he can restore it for you. Sometimes."

"So, it only works when you lose your powers. And how  _does_  one lose their powers?"

"When Scarlet Witch returned things to normal and hundreds of mutants lost their powers—but, that's no the point. Can the Flash transport objects through time?"

"Is Quicksilver even a good guy?"

"Do you even know which the Flash you like?"

"Penny! Who do you think is better?"

The actress winced as the two scientists turned to her. This was what she hated about Bernadette's idea of looking into comic books. "Uh… well, you both have good points—"

"Choose!"

Stuart blinked as the three women started arguing before turning to Sheldon, "what's happening?"

The physicist glanced at the three then shrugged. "Somebody probably went back in time, stepped on a bug, changed the future and somehow made comic book ignorants appreciate great literature. Now, where are my new comic books?"

* * *

**#17 - Ramona and Martha : Night Behind the Bushes**

Ramona Nowitzki peered over the bush before quickly ducking. "There's five of them and two kids. All have been met before."

Her partner in crime, Martha, noted the information down in her notebook. "So, it's not a date?"

Based on what she saw, their targets weren't even sitting next to each other. A date would require them to sit  _across_  from each other. "Affirmative. It looks like it's just a typical hangout than a date. They're barely interacting."

"Ah, that's good news," Martha said, tucking her notebook into her bag. "If they're not together, then we both still have a fair chance; children or not."

"I know right? They've always been close, so this really isn't new," she explained to her new friend. She could tell by the way that Sheldon approached  _her_  that they were very close. Like best friends since childhood close. "The problem is; she's  _always_  been in love with him."

Martha gasped before taking her turn at peeking over the bush. "That is a problem. If they really are  _that_  close, then there's a chance that he's fallen in love with her. Then, that means that we don't stand a chance!"

Ramona shook her head and placed a comforting hand on her friend's shoulder. "As long as they're not together, we still have a chance." Martha nodded, realizing that she was right. "Now, let's continue the observations! We need to collect as much data as we can."

* * *

**#18 - They Say No, But, We Say Yes**

Gregg always loved spending time with the cutest toddlers in the world.

He had never been much of a fan of kids, but there was just something about Penny's two angels. With them, there was never a dull moment. Even the cold hearted Bailey loved the twins—and that meant a lot, considering the fact that this was Bailey; killer of puppies, (metaphorically; Bailey wasn't that cruel) all things happy and cheerful.

Which was why he was so happy when Penny asked him and Bailey to watch over the little angels. Thank god for fund raisers that had a possibility of rich old ladies hitting on geniuses! If not for them, Penny wouldn't have had to watch out for grad students that (surprisingly) took an interest on their resident genius and gave them the early gift of babysitting!

"Aunteh Baiwey and Andy pway?" Andy innocently asked as he watched Bailey flip through a magazine.

"You're bored huh, kid?" She nonchalantly asked, closing the magazine and turning to face the two toddlers. "What do you want to do?"

Maddie tilted her head in thought, "eat cake?"

Two chocolate and four red velvet cakes later…

Gregg let out an uncharacteristic burp as Bailey took a sip of water. "God, I can't believe we actually finished  _all_  of those cakes."

"I know, right? These kids don't just look like their mom, they eat like her, too." Bailey sighed, handing the two toddlers a cup full of water. "Drink lots of water, kids. I'm sure that your mom can smell sweets from a distance."

"Hey, Snarky, what time was Penny gonna pick up the twins?" Gregg calmly asked, taking the plates to the sink.

"Uhh, at about four thirty."

…

"Oh, crap it's four twenty-nine! Hide the evidence! Penny  _can_  smell chocolate and anything sweet from a distance!"

* * *

**#19 - Moneymaker**

Leonard grinned smugly as Howard, Raj, Bernadette and Amy all gathered around in their living room. Today was a big day—so big, that he wore his special 'I'm super lucky' hoodie.

"What are we even doing here?" Howard asked with a frown, "you do know that we still have a lot to do with moving our furniture and whatnot."

Bernadette placed a hand over his and smiled, "it's okay, Howie, there's nothing wrong with expressing how much you missed our friends."

Raj nodded, "yeah, two weeks  _was_  a long time."

"I sense that that wasn't sarcasm," Amy nonchalantly said, pushing her glasses up.

Penny glanced at Sheldon, who nodded, before grinned. "We gathered you here today to announce that…" she grabbed his hand (Raj gasped) and raised it, "we're together!"

Everyone—minus the new couple and Amy—all turned to Howard who groaned.

"That's a hundred dollars, Howie."

"Dude—you owe me  _four_  hundred!"

"Don't forget my thousand dollars, big spender!"

Yep, today was  _definitely_  a lucky day.

* * *

**#20 - Third Party Remarks**

"—and we're here at the Truth About Life premiere and there are hundreds of screaming fans out here, waiting for the cast to come out."

"Not only are the cast phenomenal, but it is said that the movie is a frontrunner in the Oscars."

"That's right, there are a lot of talks that this is a potential Oscar win for the two lead actors and the movie itself. And here comes the cast!"

"James Franco seems to be alone tonight, but looking great in that suit! Critics say that he's a shoo in to win best supporting actor. I watched the movie at the film festival release and I have to say he was absolutely amazing. You could really tell that he  _was_  the character."

"I heard that he even spent a week observing scientists just to see how they work and took a few chemistry and biology class. It's truly remarkable to know how dedicated he was in getting into character."

"I agree—oh and there's the star of the night! Penny is looking  _absolutely_  gorgeous in her metallic gray gown—look, her boyfriend, renowned physicist Dr. Sheldon Cooper, is her date for tonight."

"It's quite a shock to see him accompanying her as sources say that he's a very private person. It was only last week when news broke out that they're together and there has been nothing but positive reactions regarding it. I personally think that they suit each other. He's actually quite good looking, isn't he?"

"I know—he and Penny certainly steal the spotlight. There have been rumors that Penny is a strong contender for best actress, and like James, I have to agree; she was remarkable! You could really feel the emotion in her acting. I cried. A lot."

"Wow, you're really making me super exci—oh look, Dr. Cooper is… fanboying?"

"Yes, from what I can hear, Dr. Cooper is a huge comic book fan and is saying that he loved James' portrayal of Harry Osbourne in the Spiderman movies. Who doesn't?"

"Dr. Cooper sure is interesting—Penny sure got her a good one. Thanks, we'll get back to you in a bit. In other news…"

* * *

**#21 - Good Things (Sometimes) Happen When Something Bad Happens**

Penny placed a mug of tea in front of Raj and handed him a box of tissues. "Then, what happened?"

Raj sniffed, "she probably climbed out of the restroom window and left—and that was a really small window! Then, she texted me saying that she couldn't see me anymore. Why does this keep happening to me, Penny?!"

Sheldon snorted, preparing the twins' breakfast, "probably because you like appearing when  _others_  are busy doing something. Now, the twins are two hours too early to be awake,"

"Were you doing something naughty?!" Raj asked while blowing his nose.

"Don't be ridiculous," the theoretical physicist hissed, "we were in the process of decorating the house for the twins. I don't care much about Christmas but the twins think that if we have a tree, Santa will visit. Please, ignore me."

Penny raised an eyebrow before turning back to Raj. "Back to what we were talking about; I think that this happens so that you'll be able to see that she—probably—wasn't the one."

"But, the worst part is—I'm so depressed that I can't even drink!"

Sheldon stopped what he was doing and slowly turned to face his friend, "you haven't had a drink?"

"Nope, but I wish I had!"

"You do realize that you're taking to a female without having to drink, right?"

Raj paused from crying and stared at Penny who was grinning. "I can talk!"

* * *

**#22 - Ask And You Shall Receive**

Sheldon had always hated Christmas and celebrating it. He considered gift giving to be tedious and decorating the house to be an extreme waste of both time and money. Who even needed a thousand blinding lights and various Santas at their house? No one did.

But as it was the twins' first Christmas with him, he guessed that he could put his opinions aside for a week or two to make the twins happy. Plus, Penny said so. She said that the twins  _loved_  the holiday and would be heartbroken if he became the Grinch. As if he could 'steal' Christmas and other nonsensical activities.

His main problem was; what was he going to get Penny?

He already had a present for the twins (it was their own R2D2 and C3PO, they were going to love it) but he still had nothing for Penny. Which was bad, because he overheard her talking to someone on the phone that she was going to get him to meet Leonard Nimoy. He nearly had a heart attack at what he heard, and was the reason why he waited for any mention of what she wanted.

"—believe that the robot chase has reached the other end of this park," Penny said, walking beside him as the twins followed the three fighting robots. "I thought that there was a specified ten feet arena space allowance?"

He snorted, glancing at Leonard, Howard and Raj who were shouting at each other while fighting with their robots. Ever since their last robot wars, he vowed that his robot would be the ultimate killing machine. The other three's were just prototypes that were about to get ruined. "There is, but they're not respecting that rule."

"Ah. Good thing you didn't join in, or else your Shelbot would probably destroy them."

Sheldon was prevented from responding to Penny's comment when he felt a hand slip into his own, and he looked down to see Andy grinning up at him happily. His eyes were lit up with excitement while Maddie was hopping on one foot then the other. "What's got you excited?"

The twins grinned and they watched with interest as they pointed towards a young woman standing near a tree, holding a leash that held her small golden lab puppy. Sheldon and Penny both looked at where the two were pointing to, and when the twins looked back up at their parents, they were practically falling over with excitement. "A puppy!"

Maddie grabbed Penny's hand, practically yanking her over to the dog. "Go see, da puppy, Mommy!" Sheldon and Penny shared a brief look, nodding, before allowing the twins to drag them to where the woman was standing at.

The woman, who looked to be in her thirties, was watching what they could assume was her child. The energetic puppy (who was probably only a few months old) was tugging playfully, either waiting to be played with or wanting to go on a walk.

Sheldon held both of the twins for a moment as they approached the dog, wanting to make sure that the dog was safe. It may look like a teddy bear, but like the twins, it could be a nightmare, as well. The twins both pouted as he placed a hand on their shoulders, keeping them back from the dog.

"Hi," Penny started—but not before throwing him a glare—smiling at the woman and charming her in an instant. "I hope you don't mind, but our twins really wanted to come over and see your dog." She said as politely as possible as the woman glanced at the family. "I just wanted to make sure it was okay with you if they—"

"You're Penny!" The woman gasped, and he instantly knew that she was a fan with the way a wide grin immediately broke out on her face. "I'm such a big fan—of course your angels can play with Luigi."

"Luigi?" He asked as he released the twins who quickly focused their attention on the puppy. Dog saliva. He was going to need to wash the twins' faces after this. "As in Mario and Luigi?"

The woman nodded, taking out her phone and getting a picture with Penny. "Yes, my husband is a huge fan of Mario and Luigi." She gave Penny a (tight) hug and squealed. "Thank you for the picture! I absolutely love your show!"

Penny smiled, looking honored to be admired, "no problem. Is it okay if I play with little Luigi, too?"

"Of course!"

He watched as Penny crouched down beside the twins and started combing her fingers through the puppy's golden colored fur. "You know, I've always wanted a dog. I had a dog back in Nebraska, but she died when I left." She said longingly. "I've been planning on getting one for the twins—something hypoallergenic, in case they're allergic—but have never had the time to look for one in the pound."

And that brought him to Christmas day.

"Merry Christmas, everyone!"

Sheldon quickly hid his present outside as Penny (who wore a Santa) entered the living room with the twins. "Merry Christmas."

Leonard grinned beside him, eyeing his present through the french door. "Merry Christmas, guys."

Andy and Maddie went straight to the giant Christmas tree (which he chose) and searched for the boxes with their names on it; i.e. the four and three feet tall boxes, respectively. He and Penny agreed that it would be from the both of them—mainly because Penny wouldn't take no for an answer when he said that she didn't need to buy the materials he needed.

"Dis mine?!" Andy gasped, staring at the giant box in front of him.

"Yes, it is," Penny chuckled, taking a seat beside him, "and that red one is yours, Maddie."

The toddler blinked at the red box before grinning mischievously—the one that Penny had whenever she was planning something—and started tearing the wrapper (rather mercilessly) off the box. It was like he had cloned Penny.

Andy, on the other hand, looked affronted by the way his sister opened his present and shook his head in disapproval. He silently sat down and neatly picked the wrapping apart before ripping it open due to excitement. Once he unveiled his gift, his eyes grew wide as he glanced from it then to them. "Dis C-twee-P-oh! Andy gots a C-twee-P-oh! Dis da bestest kis-mas evah!"

"Ah-two-dee-two!" Maddie exclaimed once she saw the robot. "Maddie woves it!"

The two parents both smiled happily as the twins started playing with the robots while Leonard handed them each a box. "Merry Christmas, you two."

He opened it and found… a decent gift; a Flash shirt with 'Dr. Cooper' written on the back. It was actually irksome that Leonard ruined an official Flash merchandise by printing over it, but nothing was wrong with his name.

"This is cool!" Penny remarked holding the shirt up—and that's when he saw the words on the back.

_Mrs. Cooper_

He snorted and shoved his gift to Leonard. "I hope that kills you in your sleep."

Leonard laughed as he unwrapped his gift. "Oh my god—it's the Oathbreaker sword from Game of Thrones! Thanks!" He reached over for an uncomfortable hug before Sheldon pushed him away. "It's awesome!"

"I know that you already know your present," the blonde started, "so, what did you get me?"

He grinned, rushing outside and hiding his surprise behind his back. "I got you—" he stepped closer to her, Leonard grinning with excitement, before lifting the light brown colored puppy towards her, "—this puppy."

"Oh my god!" She squealed, standing from the couch and taking their new pet from him. "He's so cute! What's his name? What breed is he? How'd you get him—he's so perfect!"

Sheldon smugly hi-fived Leonard as the twins approached the puppy. "Well, you said that you always wanted a dog, and so I got you one. He's one of those Labradoodles that Raj loves and doesn't have a name, yet. Leonard and I went to the shelter this morning to find one that's suitable for us—and this one wouldn't stop trying to get Leonard's attention.

"Apparently, he was left at the shelter with his siblings and was the last one left of the siblings. He's already been house trained, has good health, all the shots and is actually quite obedient—"

"—he's also hypoallergenic—"

"—that, too," Sheldon nodded, gesturing to the puppy, "he's four months old. The woman there said that he'd fit in with us, and we chose him."

Penny placed the puppy down on the couch before reaching up and planting a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you, sweetie. I really love him."

He turned away as Leonard poked his back, "I'm glad that you did, because I have no intentions of returning him if you didn't. What would you like to name him?"

Maddie's head snapped towards them, her eyes twinkling with glee. "Puppy's name is Bowsah!"

Andy looked up from the puppy and nodded in agreement, "puppy wooks wike Bowsah!"

Sheldon smiled, "Bowser it is."

* * *

**#23 - Imaaaagiiinaaaatioooon (Is All I Want For You) Volume 2**

**2013**

"Somebody, help! The queen and the princess is in danger!" Leonard (who was, apparently, one of the queens guard) yelled, shouting from the top of the playground. "The dragon is approaching them!"

Bernadette (one of the town folk) gasped, abandoning her cabbage stall and running towards the supposed town square. "The queen is in danger! The queen is in danger! Someone needs to help them!"

The knight from a foreign land—Raj—jumped (flailed) from the other end of the playground deck and dramatically glanced around. "The queen? In danger?" He scurried towards Bernadette and started waving his arms around, "who is threatening my fair queen?"

Amy—a lady in waiting—exited the 'castle' and pretended to collapse. "The d-dragon… he is threatening to eat both the queen and the princess… someone… help them…"

"My lady!" cried Bernadette as Amy pretended to 'die.' "Please, hang on! The queen needs you! Noooo!"

Howard appeared from the living room, (foolish) pulling his toy sword and pointing it in the air. "I am Howard of Wolowits, fiercest knight of our land and slayer of dragons! Where is this dragon you speak of?"

"Ove' there, sir!" Gregg—who was supposedly some sort of street performer person with a British accent—replied, pointing towards the 'castle.' "The queen's in danger—please, save our queen!"

"I will spare that damned—"

"—no cursing!—" Penny screamed from the castle.

"—darned dragon no mercy! Here I go!" Howard charged towards the playground and immediately ran back out. "That dragon's no match for me!"

Andy stepped out from behind the playground and did his best 'scary' laugh, "I da dwagon! I gonna eat da queen and da pwincess!"

"Da dwagon gonna eat us!" cried Maddie aka the princess.

Penny dramatically waved her hands in the air, "please, save me! The dragon will eat us!"

"Is there no one—preferably a six foot knight who's scowling—who can save the queen?" Leonard called with a faux hopeless look.

"This may be the stupidest thing I've ever seen," Bailey snorted, shoving a handful of nuts in her mouth. "And I've seen nearly all of Gregg's one man shows."

Sheldon sighed as he placed his cape, "I agree with you for once." He walked past Bailey and groaned, "I am Sheldor, release the queen."

"The hero has arrived!"

Bailey laughed.

* * *

**#24 - California Is Nothing Like Nebraska**

Wyatt scowled as his daughter wrapped a scarf around herself. Compared to the Nebraska snow, the cold air in California was nothing. How could his slugger forget that?

"Aren't you going to get cold dressed like that?" Penny asked, finally done with her attire.

"The weather back home is colder than this, Pen," he snorted, shoving his hands in his pocket. It wasn't even cold! Was this what they considered as cold?

Barbara chuckled as she draped his coat on his shoulders, "aww come on, dad, go easy on Penny." She handed him a pair of mitts before walking over to their mother, "mom, tell dad to go easy on Penny."

His wife smiled, already bundled up as if it was actually cold. "Oh honey, don't mind your dad. He's just mad that you haven't come home in ages."

"Ah! So, that's the problem, huh," Penny hummed, "I'll tell you what, dad; why don't we fly to Nebraska right now? I'm sure Sheldon will be fine with the twins over the weekend."

Wyatt almost cried. "Can we bring the twins? Your boyfriend can probably handle himself, right?"

His youngest daughter grinned and it brought him back to the days when he was the only guy she loved. "Of course! I'll go pack! Give me half an hour—Barbs, get us some tickets, we're going home!"

He guessed that even if his slugger lived in California, now, she would always come back to Nebraska.

* * *

**#25 - AU : What if Penny was already married to someone else?**

Sheldon swallowed the lump in his throat as Leonard nudged him to approach the three blondes who were patiently waiting on the park bench.

He didn't understand how he was supposed to just walk up to those two kids and introduced himself as their father. They were six for crying out loud—hardly the appropriate age to meet your biological father! He blamed Leonard for all of this. He should never have told him about them. That way, they would all be happy with their lives. "Must I really do this, Leonard?"

"I've said this ten times now, yes, you do," his roommate huffed in irritation, "you're their father, you both have the right to meet each other."

"But, they already have a father of their own!" He hissed, eyeing the auburn haired man that stood beside the bench that the blondes were sitting on. "There's no reason for me to even be in their life!"

Leonard let out a sad sigh, "listen, buddy, it's my fault that you didn't know about them until now. I'm not gonna make another mistake by  _not_  letting you meet them."

He was right; it was his fault. For six whole years, his life had been completely quiet and peaceful; then on Leonard's bachelor's party, he suddenly tells him that he has two kids with Penny. Which was what brought them to a park in New York where Penny lived; for him to finally meet his supposed children. "I hardly think that this is appropriate—we look like stalkers, Leonard. This is creepy."

"I know! But, my guilty conscience won't stop bothering me i I don't find a way to fix this," Leonard admitted, shoving his hands in his pockets and gently kicking a rock. "I kept this from you because I thought that it was the right thing to do, but now I've realized that I was just being selfish. You have to do this, buddy."

Sheldon took in a deep breath as he watched Penny's husband happily laughing as he took pictures of his family. (His or his—did it matter?) Penny lifted the little boy while the little girl raised her arms up to the auburn haired man, asking him to pick her up. Even from the distance between them, he could see that the girl had his eyes and that the boy had his smile. They were both a mix of him and Penny.

That was when he realized that even though they were half him, they were doing just fine without him. Six years was enough time to prove that it would be a mistake to even bother them. The twins looked happy, and it seemed that Penny's husband truly cared for them. They might even be calling him dad. He'll never be their dad; someone else already had that role.

He would only be meddling in someone else's life.

He would be fine without  _them_.

They were fine  _without_  him.

"Let's go home, Leonard," he calmly said, turning his back on the happy family and placing a hand on his best friend's shoulder. "We still have to do some irrelevant stuff for your wedding."

Leonard opened his mouth to speak but he quickly cut him off. "I don't have children, Leonard, you were just hallucinating things. Now, come one. I'll book the first flight home." Leonard took one last glance at the family before realizing why Sheldon backed out and finally understood. He sent his ex-girlfriend a small smile—not that she was looking, she was too busy playing with the twins to notice them—then trotted after his best friend. "Hey, wait for me! Let's stop by the Lego store on the way back, I think that there are new Star Wars models."

Penny glanced up from her twins, feeling as if someone was watching them. She looked around the park and found nothing suspicious. Which was odd, as she swore that she heard Sheldon and Leonard's voice.

"Is there something wrong, babe?" Her husband asked, a look of concern on his face.

She looked down to see the twins staring worriedly at her and she shook her head. "No, it's nothing. Why don't we all go buy some ice cream?"

* * *

**#26 - Isn't Mario Kart And Grand Theft Auto Enough?**

"This is a brand new simulator with the most advanced technology out there," Howard explained, setting up the steering wheel in front of Sheldon. "Are you up for this?"

Sheldon snorted in derision, "of course, I am! I have an IQ of 187, driving's a piece of cake."

The engineer rolled his eyes and started the simulator. "That's what you said the first time."

Ten minutes later.

"Sheldon! Turn right!" Howard.

"Dude, that's the brakes! Put it on reverse!" Raj.

"Pedestrians!  _Avoid_  the pedestrians!" Leonard.

"Oh my god! Oh my god! That's—crap—left! Left!" Penny.

Five hours later.

"Daddy, dats a twee!" Andy.

"Mommy, why daddy bumping ebi-one?" Maddie.

Two days later.

"Sheldon, think of it as one of those Pacman games, except for the fact that you have to avoid the corne—the lamp post! The lamp post!" Amy.

"Do you think this is a game, Sheldon? You just ran over a kid! You don't run over a family when it's Christmas!" Bernadette.

Five days later.

"Watch out for the fire hydrant—that was close!" Gregg.

"Turn, you idiot! Right! Steer the wheel to sixty degrees—there you to, you big dork!" Bailey.

One week later.

"I did it…" Sheldon tiredly said as every single one of his past observers cheered behind him. "Zero casualties…"

Howard glanced the chart, "no bumps. No kills, no injuries. And it only took you a hundred and forty-six hours. Congratulations. Do we go to the DMV today or tomorrow? This streak might end if we don't."

* * *

**#27 - Ramona and Martha : Stake Out**

Martha zoomed in her telescope and signaled for her partner in crime, Ramona Nowitzki to come over. "There they are—they're on the back porch."

Ramona took her turn using the telescope and hummed. The targets were having lunch at their backyard. "Affirmative. Based on what I saw in the target's former apartment, those intruders are his mother, grandmother, sister and either his brother or sister's family."

"Do you think that this is one of those meet the family times?" Martha asked with a small gasp.

Due to the distance of the building they were at and the target's location, it was impossible to tell. "I'm not sure. The target is living there, so it's not impossible for his family to visit. They've met her before, she must not have a problem with them staying over."

"What if they're staying over because they wanted to meet their future daughter in law?" Martha sadly said, stepping away from the telescope.

Ramona placed a hand on her shoulder and sighed, "we'll never know until we finally know the truth. But who knows? We may still have a chance. Let's do one last observation then we'll see where we stand."

* * *

**#28 - Mi Familia Es Su Familia**

Mr. Fleming broke out a grin once he saw sight of the tall, grumpy looking man waling beside Penny and the twins. He had waited for so long to meet the infamous Sheldon that Penny never stopped talking about. Based on what the blonde said, he could say that he was certainly an interesting person. He was even planning on creating a character based on him.

"Mr. Fleming, good morning!" Penny greeted, looking bright and cheery at seven o' clock. She probably woke up on the right side of the bed—she was never  _this_  happy before eight o' clock.

"Mohning Mistah Fleming!" Andy exclaimed, looking equally as energetic as his mother. He was always such a happy, energetic toddler that was a great contrast to his twin sister.

"Mohning," Maddie grumbled from her father's arms. She never really liked mornings. Or waking up from naps.

He watched as the family of four approached him, "hello. My my, is it just me or are these two getting bigger and bigger? Barely a month yet they've grown!"

Penny chuckled, "ah, he's probably the reason why," she nodded towards the tall man (he already knew everything about him, but he was just waiting for her to introduce him) who looked like he wasn't happy to be here. "Mr. Fleming, you know my boyfriend, Sheldon, Sheldon, this is our director, Mr. Fleming."

Sheldon nodded in acknowledgement, "it's nice to meet you, Mr. Fleming."

"It's nice to meet you, too, Sheldon," he grinned, "I'd shake your hand, but I know that you don't like handshakes. Penny's told me a lot about you, and I'm really glad to finally meet you."

"Likewise."

Ah, he really was as stiff as Penny had said. What a truly interesting man. "Relax, I'm not gonna bite you. Your like family to me, even if I never met you—but I like you already, boy. Why don't we introduce you to Leonard Nimoy? He's at his dressing room, right now."

Then, his eyes lit up and he could tell that he was going to like this boy for Penny.

* * *

**#29 - Things I Don't Like To Remember**

Penny watched quietly as Sheldon started washing the dishes. He didn't trust dishwashers—he claimed that they didn't really clean the dishes—and washed them himself. She often dried them, when he said that he could. She'd never understand his cleaning rituals, but she was happy that her boyfriend was the clean freak that he was or else her house would be a pig sty.

"Do you remember what day it is, today?"

She glanced up from the dish she was drying and blinked, "it's the tenth, why?"

"It's the day that you left California, three years ago, that is."

Oh.

For a moment there, she thought that she saw an expression close to anguish on his face. She didn't notice what day it was—but, she remembered that day. She was supposed to take him to the mall to buy that gift for that professor, but then she got rejected at that audition. Then, she left. "Ah. I don't really like to think about that day. I hurt you, didn't I?"

"Betrayed, yes," he corrected, briefly glancing at her, "you didn't take me gift shopping. You ruined my life, again. It's odd to think that that was three years, ago. But, getting me to meet Leonard Nimoy—and getting him to lift the restraining order against me—is good enough."

"That means you've forgive me… right?"

"It does."

"Cause you love me?"

"Yes."

"Well, I love you, too."

"That's certainly assuring."

They shared a look before they laughed. "You know, I'm thinking of moving back to Nebraska."

"You still have to introduce me to William Shatner—then, we'll see about that."

* * *

**#30 - You Didn't See It Coming, Did You?**

It was an early Sunday morning when Penny woke up to the sounds of slightly hushed voices and footsteps. Which probably meant one thing;

It was Mother's day!

She smiled as she stretched in bed before trying to go back to sleep. Which was actually really hard to do, because Sheldon forgot that there was a baby monitor on the wall in between then living room and the kitchen. So, she could hear all of the ruckus that the three (plus Leonard) were making. Well, that was mainly because she switched the one in her room on—and now she turned it off. She was good.

Nearly twenty minutes later, she heard the tell tale noises of the 'House of M'—which, based on what Bernadette said, was actually quite a tragic arc in the comic books—brigade coming to surprise her, and she immediately threw the covers on her and pretended to sleep.

The end of the bed dipped as the twins climbed on it, slowly—carefully trying to avoid abruptly waking her up—making their way to her. Maddie pulled the covers back while Andy sat next to her side.

 _Tap, tap, tap._  "Mommy?"

 _Tap, tap, tap._  "Mommy?"

 _Tap, tap, tap._  "Mommy?"

She swore that she could hear Leonard suppressing his laugh somewhere in the room before the door closed. He must've went back to sleep; the twins probably dragged him into helping. "Mommy, you awake?" Maddie 'whispered.'

She opened an eye, "Sheldon, we have a problem, I think Bowser can talk, now."

The twins bursted into giggles and Andy spoke, again, "Mommy! It's us!"

She quickly sat up and wrapped her arms around them. Boy, they were getting big. "Good morning, what are the two of you doing in my bed so early?"

"HAPPY MOMMY'S DAY MOMMY!" The two happily shouted, causing her to wince from the small distance between them.

Sheldon suddenly appeared and placed a tray over her legs. "Daddy cooked the bweakfast and Uncle Leonard maked the owange juice!" Andy happily announced as they settled on each side of her. "We didn't do a lot, but we cwacked the eggs!"

Maddie nodded happily, "I dipped the bwead! Daddy said you liked toast."

"Ah, I do—ham and cheese omelette, french toast and bacon!" She grinned up at Sheldon who was staring at her. "You're ruining my diet, sweetie."

He raised an eyebrow, blinking as he gestured to her food. "Would you like me to change it to something more appropriate? Like a salad?"

She laughed, "no, this is perfect, you guys. I love it—thank you."

He gave her a smile before grabbing something from the armchair, "oh, and the twins made you this." He placed a clay figure and a drawing on the free space n the tray. "Mother's day gifts as per Leonard's suggestion."

"That's you, Mommy!" Andy beamed as he pointed to the yellow circular thing with green eyes. And look, Sheldon (the brown thing with blue eyes) the twins (they were both orange for some reason) Bowser (the other brown thing) was there, too. And Andy remembered the fingers! "This is amazing, Andy, thank you."

On the right of the tray was a clay figure that looked  _a lot_  like a stiletto. "Uncle Leonard said that you liked shoes, Mommy—so I made you one!" Maddie proudly explained, pointing to the shoe. "This is just lovely, thank you!" She glanced up and saw Sheldon looking away.

She grabbed his sleeve and pulled him down for a kiss, "and thank you, too. The food looks great! Let's eat—and call Leonard in, no one gets to sleep until I get more!"

* * *

**#31 - Who Would Have Thought?**

Sheldon, Penny, Leonard, Amy, Raj and the twins all sat quietly as they waited for any news from Howard.

"This is absolutely excruciating," Sheldon hissed, craning his head to see if Howard had come out, yet. "We've been here for nearly two hours—what's happening?"

Penny threw him a glare, "this isn't a gumball machine where you insert a coin and immediately get one. This takes time."

"Your wisdom is astounding, bestie," Amy said with awe, "have you ever thought of writing a book?"

"That's actually a good idea, you know—oh, there's Howard."

Howard approached them, his face slightly contorted in distress. "Guys."

Raj sprung from the chair and shook Howard, "how is she?"

"Is she alright?" Leonard asked with concern.

The engineer sighed—emitting a gasp from nearly all of them—before breaking out a proud grin. "It's a boy! Bernadette's parents are still on the road from San Diego as we speak, though."

"Yes! Raj you owe me!" Penny cheered, extending her hand out to the astrophysicist who handed her the money. "Can we see them, now?"

Howard nodded before leading them to Bernadette's room. Upon entering, the saw Mrs. Wolowitz and Bernadette cooing at the blue bundle in her arms.

"Oh my god, I'm crying," Raj sniffed as he stood next to the bed, staring down at the brown haired baby. "He's so cute—he looks like you, Bernadette."

Leonard wiped at his eyes, "this is exactly how I felt when I first saw the twins. I can't believe that both Howard and Sheldon have families before I will. This is crazy."

Maddie frowned as Penny carried her to see the newest addition to the Wolowitz family. "Mommy, what's that?"

"That's a baby, sweetie," the blonde replied, smiling down at the baby, "that's Uncle Howard and Auntie Bernadette's son."

Andy glanced up at Sheldon, "was I a baby, too, Daddy?"

"You were," Sheldon said, briefly wondering how the twins were as babies. He only saw them in that stage in the home videos that Penny had. "Howard, if I may inquire, what is his name?"

"We agreed that mom would name him," the engineer turned to his mother who was wiping at her tears. "Mom, care to tell us what you've named your grandson?"

Mrs. Wolowitz blew her nose, "I named him Harvey."

"Aww!"

Penny shifted Maddie, "what do you think about babies?" Maddie furrowed her eyebrows and turned to the baby—who started to  _cry_.

"Please, don't have babies, Daddy," Andy grumbled, covering his ears as the baby cried.

If babies were  _this_  noisy, they'd prefer that their parents never have a baby. Besides, the two of them were already enough.

* * *

**#32 - You Really Didn't See It Coming**

Sheldon yawned as he descended the stairs. He had a lot of things to do today; make their breakfast, clean, defeat the biology department at paintball and prepare his long awaited Nobel speech. Then, he had to book his family's plane tickets to Europe and get them a hotel room at the hotel that they'd be staying at and  _a lot_  more.

Being the biggest name in the field of science was both invigorating  _and_  taxing—and these were just the pre-Nobel preparations.

He stopped near the dining room once he saw their not-so-puppy looking dog waiting for him, his tail wagging excitedly at the sight of him. He had always hated dogs (regardless of the fact that they had several dogs) but there was just something about Bowser that he generally liked. He was such a good dog. "Good morning, Bowser."

_Bark!_

Bowser was also such an intelligent and obedient dog that he couldn't help but grow accustomed to the ten month old dog. He patted his head, and the dog immediately followed him to the kitchen. "You're probably hungry, aren't you?" The dog glanced up at him as if understood and continued walking. If he had met this dog years ago, he probably would never had hated dogs—

"HAPPY DADDY's DAY!"

Sheldon abruptly stopped, clutched his chest in shock and turned to see his three blondes (and Leonard who was quietly eating breakfast in the background) acting like a welcoming committee in the kitchen. "Hello."

Andy rushed towards him and gave him (his legs) a hug, "happy daddy's day, daddy!"

Penny carried Maddie and walked towards him, Maddie giving him a kiss on the cheek. "It's daddy's day, today, daddy!"

"Happy father's day, buddy!" Leonard said with a mouthful of whatever he was eating.

He furrowed his eyebrows and glanced down at the three blondes surrounding him. Who would've thought that he would actually feel happy at the thought of having a family? His mother was right, times are really a-changing. "I must admit; you surprised me. What's that burning smell?"

* * *

**#33 - Ramona and Martha : Last Resort**

Today was going to be their very last stakeout, and somehow, the two partners in crime felt very, very sad about it. Mainly because this would mean that they had given up, and had thrown in the towel. Even if they weren't quitters, there was always a time to stop trying.

Seven and half months were more than enough to gather evidence on whether or not they still had a chance at getting Sheldon. Sadly, all of the evidence proved that he was already with Penny. That and the fact that they never knew that Penny was a celebrity (who would've thought?!) and had already admitted to dating Sheldon.

It was really game over for them.

"Shopping, huh," Ramona sighed, peering over her newspaper as they watched their targets walking through a shopping strip. "It's a bit sad to think that our last stakeout was at a mall."

Martha nodded beside her as she munched on a pretzel. "I know, but isn't that the ultimate proof that they're together?"

"It is, but as this is our swan song, we have to make this count. That way, we'll remember this for years to come." Ramona turned back to her and smiled at her new best friend. Regardless of how creepy it sounded, these stakeouts were the reason why she and Martha became best friends. And their admiration for Sheldon. And their general hate for the man stealer named Penny.

"How many can say that they've stalked a Nobel laureate? Not a lot."

"I can't believe that he finally won it—I can still remember the times when I pushed him to—"

"Hi there, girls!" They both froze in their spots as they recognized the voice as their target's and slowly turned to see Penny pleasantly smiling at them. "Wanna hangout with me and Sheldon?"

Sheldon snorted, "it's Sheldon and  _I_ , Penny."

"Whatever—so, what do you say?"

The two girls shared a look before smiling up at the blonde.

Maybe, she wasn't as bad as they thought.

* * *

**#34 - Priorities Aren't Hard to Set Straight**

Dr. Sheldon Cooper had always  _hated_  flying. Not only was there a fifty-fifty percent chance of the airplane crashing, there were also those cursed turbulence that sometimes made him sick to the core. That was a main factor why he enjoyed trains more—there were  _no_  turbulence, and they were a hoot.

The problem was; there was no train to Sweden, and the only option was to take a train. Well, he could take a boat and sail there, but that wasn't really recommended by anyone. So here they—they meaning  _all_  of them; minus Bernadette who was at home—were, on a fancy schmancy bumpy plane to Stockholm to watch him achieve his lifelong dream.

At least there was wifi on board.

"The great thing about business class is the fact that it's  _kind of_  like first class, but with limiter options, smaller room, less quality service and a bit cheaper." Raj remarked, taking a sip of his mimosa.

Leonard raised an eyebrow beside him, "but don't most airlines have business class as their first class?"

"You my friend, don't know how to live," Raj hissed, putting his headphones on and ignoring his seat mate. Leonard would never understand the life of a plane flyer.

Howard chuckled at the two scientists before turning to Amy, "look at them, arguing over petty things while we relax to the music of Neil Diamond. If they just bought him on iTunes, they'd be having a blast."

Amy nodded, "you're right. Neil Diamond  _does_  make everything better, doesn't he?"

Sheldon swallowed the nervous lump in his throat as he felt Penny place a hand on his. "Hey, sweetie, are you alright? You seem tense." He gave her a small unsure smile before glancing at the twins who were fast asleep at the opposite aisle. If only he could just sleep it off. "I'm fine I was just ne—"

His vision suddenly zoomed in on the email that she was reading and he gasped. "Penny, why didn't you tell me that today was the Emmys?"

Penny raised her eyebrows and turned to the email from Gregg who informed her about her  _second_  Emmy win and Halfway There's win. "Oh, that. Yeah, it was a few hours ago and I only saw the email now. Pretty sweet, actually."

Was she insane? How was she able to act so calm?! The Emmys were the television counterpart of the Nobel—there was no way that you could win and be relaxed about it. "Penny, why didn't you go?! This is the  _second_  time that you won yet didn't accept the award in person; they might ban you for that. Plus, your show finally won! Isn't that what you've always wanted?"

Penny gave him a small smile and intertwined her hand with his. "I've known you for six whole years now, and ever since the moment I met you, you've been talking about how you're going to win the Nobel. And now, here you are, about to win the Nobel—and I'd rather see you accept that Nobel than me winning every single award out there. This is you fulfilling your dream, sweetie."

Sheldon felt all of his anxiety disappear in an instant at her words and he knew that there was something near him that was much more important than winning the Nobel. He leaned down and pressed a kiss on her lips. "I love you, Penny."

She grinned and he forgot about how much he hated planes. "I love you, too, sweetie."

* * *

 **#35 -**   **AU : What if Penny never told anyone about the twins and Sheldon and Amy went through with their plan of having a child together?**

"Why don't you just enter a relationship with her?" Raj asked, taking a bite of his ice cream.

Leonard nodded beside him, glancing around the park. It was a nice day today. "Raj's right, Sheldon. Look at Howard and Bernadette; the married life seems to be doing them well. Besides, Amy would be a great wife for you."

Sheldon scowled at his two friends as he kept his eye on the brown haired little boy who was playing in the sandbox. "Must I repeat myself again and again? Though Amy and I have entered a special intellectual partnership and have scientifically spawned (Raj and Leonard both snorted) a progeny, it does not necessarily mean that I have to marry her."

"Dude, are you even listening to yourself?" Raj exclaimed in incredulity, causing the two roommates to flinch, "that's exactly what people do before and after they get married! You're making this so hard for everyone, you know!"

There it was, again; the petulant nagging that he thought he would only get from his mother when he decided to have a child (via in-vitro) with Amy. He didn't agree to it because he wanted to 'settle down' and raise a family—no, he did it because humanity  _deserved_  a gift. Kind of. Besides, having a progeny and being a coparent wasn't so bas he thought. Sometimes, it was even fun.

Although, there  _were_  times when he could sense that Amy wasn't happy with their little agreement—that she wanted something more that he wouldn't be able to give. Like getting married and emotions or something like that. Sadly, those things were the exact reason why he agreed to this; to avoid those aspects in having a progeny that would continue his intelligence.

They just didn't understand that.

"I already told you, I have no desire for such things," he snarled, watching his son's every move, "there were no ulterior motives in us having Isaac. Everyone at the fertilization clinic can even attest to that." His son was now playing with two blonde kids who were around his age. It was nice to know that his son could make friends. "Digressing, aren't we supposed to meet Howard in half an hour? I don't want to be late."

Raj shrugged, "dude, you're never late."

"Because I'm  _always_  on time," Sheldon stated with a smirk as they walked towards the sandbox. "Isaac, we have to leave, now."

The four year old glanced up at him, his blue eyes the same piercing ones that he had. "Oh. Is it time to go to Uncle Howard's, dad?"

"Is that your daddy, Isaac?" The male blonde asked, staring straight up at him. What a pair of aesthetically pleasing children. "He looks just like you!"

Isaac's eyes widened, remembering that he was playing with someone. "Dad, these are my new friends, Andy and Maddie—they're twins. This os my dad, and my Uncle Raj and my Uncle Leonard."

The female blonde waved at them, looking as if she was scrutinizing them. For some reason, she kind of looked like a blonde Missy, and he swore that the boy's green eyes were… familiar. He just couldn't put his finger on it. "Hello Mr. Isaac's daddy, it's nice to meet you."

"Likewise," he said, nodding in acknowledgement. "I'm actually a doctor."

"Then it's  _Dr._  Isaac's daddy," the girl corrected, earning a smile from him. What a pleasant little girl—the little boy was, too. Who knew that other people's progeny would be a hoot? "Sorry about that."

Leonard crouched down to get into eye level with the kids while Raj simply smiled, unable to speak because of the little girl… who now reminded him of Penny. Well, they both reminded him of Penny. He wondered how she was doing. "Hey, where are your parents?"

The boy innocently tilted his head to the side, "uh, I think Mommy went to the toilet. She'll probably be back soon, mister."

"Will you be fine by yourselves?" His roommate asked in concern, glancing around the park. "We can stay with you if you want."

Sheldon glared at him.

"No, it's alright, mister, Mommy will probably be back soon." The boy gave them a small smile before noticing someone, "there she is right now!"

The three scientists all turned as the two blondes ran past them, and felt their eyes widening at the sight of the twins' mother.

"Sheldon?"

* * *

**#36 - That Went Better Than They Thought (They Grow Up So Fast) Part 2**

It had been decided that come September, the twins would start going to school.

After three arguments and a month of searching for the school that they would both agree on. Initially, she had wanted the twins to go to a good public school as there were a couple in the area that were really nice—so that they'd experience how it is to go to a school that everyone goes to—but ever since there was a rise at stalkers targeting celebrity's children, she decided not to push through with it.

Sheldon, on the other hand, wanted a school that had programs that would further hone their children's special skills and abilities. He claimed that he wanted the twins to get everything that his school didn't provide him with—he looked really angry the entire time that he was telling her and Leonard this—and that he wanted the twins to explore every potential they had for various skills.

Good thing they had Leonard, who had stumbled upon the school that the two of them would both approve of; the Sunshine Center's sister school, Westfield. The school (just like how Sheldon wanted) made special schedules for each student that suited them best yet (like how she wanted) still had the 'school' vibe to it. It was actually pretty neat once you understood everything and she absolutely  _loved_  the dark blue and red colored uniforms. Sheldon snorted when she said that out loud.

And today was the twins' first day at their school.

Penny tried not to cry at the thought of that.

"Daddy," Maddie started as they walked from the parking lot to the school building, "why do we have to go to school?"

Sheldon glanced down at his daughter who had a small, confused frown on her face. Ah. The first day. He had always hated first days and combined with his short, yet unpleasant, time at school, he absolutely  _loathed_  the idea of going to school. Good thing Westfield was far from the abomination of an intellectual haven they called school in his hometown.

Well, compared to him, the twins obviously took after their mother with their vibrance, over appreciation for the world and general kindness to everything. They were probably going to be outstanding at school, and shall they not, he already had zero doubt that the twins would be  _far more_  intelligent than anyone else and could easily graduate at a young age like he had. The only problem was, Penny would not allow that and so he digressed. "Because you'll learn a lot more if you do."

"Oh, okay."

"Daddy?" This time it was Andy. Why weren't they asking Penny?! "Can't we go back to the Sunshine Center?"

"Because you're old enough to go to an actual school, now, and that place wasn't really a school."

"Ah."

They remained silent throughout the rest of their walk and finally, they reached the twins' classroom. Penny had specifically asked that the twins not be separated until they were in middle school (he had a hunch that they'd graduate before that) due to some reason that he didn't really care much about. She was probably just paranoid that the twins would be overwhelmed by the changes. Or something.

"Okay, I know that this is going to be scary," Penny started, crouching down to meet the twins' eyes, "but I promise that it'll be really fun soon."

Suddenly the classroom door opened and Sheldon nearly had a heart attack because of who he saw.

_Smiling Brenda._

"Aren't you supposed to be at the Sunshine Daycare Center?!" He half shrieked, shocked at the creepy woman suddenly appearing.

The redhead grinned (when was she not?!) and Penny stood, "since I'm head personnel there, I really just supervise. I actually really work here. I was very surprised to see that the twins were going to be in my class, to be honest." She shrugged before returning back to the classroom.

Penny—who for some reason wasn't seeing his problem with this—smiled back at her, "oh, that's great! I was afraid that the twins would have trouble, but since you're here, they'll get along just fine." She turned back to the twins who were staring at something in the classroom, "okay, twins—"

"That looks fun!" Andy chirped, staring at the activity that a couple of kids were doing before waving at the two of them. "Bye Mommy! Bye Daddy!" With a grin, he was off.

Maddie glanced at where his twin was then back at them, "see you later!"

Sheldon placed a hand on Penny's shoulder as they watched the twins quickly fitting in. "It seems that you were afraid for nothing. Would ice cream cheer you up?"

* * *

**#37 - The Ever Growing Circle**

Andy absolutely loved school.

Maddie  _did not_. Well, she loved learning (she was quicker to raise her hand than him) but she hated the thought of interacting with the others kids in their class.

"Today," Brenda started, standing at the front of the room, "we're going to play games and make friends!"

That was when he felt his twin sister stiffen beside her, eyes wide with alarm as their teacher explained the different activities they were going to do. Maddie had never bee comfortable with strangers, but he was sure that his twin would have no trouble making friends. "Maddie, you okay?"

"Yeah," she nodded, looking like she was trying to calm herself down, "I'm okay."

The frown on his twin's face made him extra happy that they were placed in the same group. The activity was simple; learn someone's favorite color. Their Mommy had said that before you ask anything personal (whatever that meant) you should introduce yourself, first. Their Daddy said to not talk at all—and Mommy hit him because of that.

"I'm Andy," he said to the dark haired boy sitting next to him, "what's your name?"

The boy stuck his hand out and grinned, "I'm Sam! Nice to meet you, Andy. Whatcha' favorite color?"

Good question! "Well, I like orange—but, I think I like red more, now. What's your favorite color?"

"Hmm… I like Spiderman," Sam said in thought, "so, red or blue's okay! Do you like Spiderman?"

He loved all of the superheroes! "I do! My daddy has lots and lots of Spiderman books—"

Suddenly, he remembered what his Daddy told him. "Andy, you should always keep an eye on your sister, alright? You're her big brother, and since neither your mother nor I will be present, you have to make sure she's okay." That's right! Since he was the older one (take that Maddie!) he had to make sure she was okay.

He worriedly glanced around the room to look for sister and found her at the opposite end of their circle, happily talking to a girl with bright orange hair. "Hey, Sam, I'm gonna introduce you to my sister, Maddie. Hey, Maddie!" He and Sam walked to the other end of the circle and sat in front of them. "Maddie, this is my new friend Sam. Sam, this is my twin sister Maddie!"

They waved at each other then Maddie glanced at her redheaded friend. "This is Cassie, she likes the color pink. Cassie, this is my brother Andy and his friend, Sam."

Andy grinned; he had a feeling that his sister wasn't going to have a problem in making new friends. They were worried for nothing.

* * *

**#38 - Has It Been That Long Already?**

"Dude!" Raj chirped, handing Sheldon a gigantic box, "that Big Bird mascot is so awesome! How did you get actual Sesame Street puppet-mascot things for the twins' birthday?"

Penny smugly grinned, "Mr. Fleming guest directed several Sesame Street episodes, so he pulled a few strings. This was his suggestion, actually. There he is—" she pointed to the jolly director happily talking to Sesame Street's main director near the buffet table "—he's actually enjoying this the most."

"I had actually planned a superhero themed birthday—DC first, then Marvel," Sheldon explained, placing the box on the gift table, "—but the estimated completion time of the destroyed city set was too long for the party preparation. Then, I thought of doing the Steel Samurai, but the twins only wanted Gregg to play him, so we settled with this."

Today was the twins' third birthday, and due to Penny declaring that this party was going to be grand—because the twins now had actual friends—they held it at the park they used for their second birthday. They also invited all of their classmates, teachers and whoever Penny thought of inviting. Like her celebrity friends, the entire HT crew and their neighbors that he didn't care about. This party was actually half the twins' and half Penny's.

Amy nodded, taking a bite of cake, "Rajesh is right, this is certainly an amazing party. If my mother had thrown me a party like this when I was three, I might have pursued my whimsical dream of being a harpist. Oh, there's the twins, now."

"Happy birthday!" The four adults greeted as the kids reached them.

"Daddy, Mommy, Uncle Raj, Aunt Amy," Andy paused in front of them and heaved, his lack of athletic skill—which he got from Sheldon—showing, "this is my friend, Sam."

The dark haired boy glanced up at them and waved, "hello."

Maddie then gestured to a redheaded girl who looked like she just saw a ghost. "And this is my friend, Cassie. That's my Mommy, my Daddy, Uncle Raj and Aunt Amy," she pointed towards the picnic table, "Uncle Leonard, Uncle Howard, Aunt Bernadette, this son, Harvey, my Aunt Bailey, Uncle Gregg, Gampappy, Granmammy, Grammy and Meemaw."

Amy sidled over to Raj and whispered, "how is she able to do that without breathing?"

"Might be from Penny… or Sheldon. They both like talking."

"You're Penny from Halfway There!" Cassie gasped, causing them all to wonder what the general viewership age of the show was. "Me and Momma love you!"

Penny grinned, bending down to talk to the four kids while Sheldon and Amy watched them.

"Hard to believe that it's been more than a year since you harassed my coworkers," Amy remarked, taking a sip of her drink. "They're still afraid of you, you know."

Sheldon nodded "it really had been that long, hasn't it? Time sure does fly. Digressing, have you seen that joke a scientist's new book? He's just trying to dumb down everything, I tell you."

* * *

**#39 - It's A Family Thing**

"Hey, great costume, guys," Stuart remarked as the family of four walked into his store. "It actually makes me wonder if you guys or real, or something that came out of my tv."

Penny grinned, as she placed down her little Princess Leia. "Aww, thanks Stuart! You  _were_  the one who suggested that we go as the Skywalker family."

Sheldon snorted, readjusting his blonde wig on the top of his head. She was right, it was Stuart's idea that they dress up like this for the comic book store's Halloween party. He was Anakin fused with Darth Vader (he wore the Dark Vader costume but not the mask) Penny was Padme Amidala, and the twins were, of course, the Skywalker twins. "Yes, you are the reason why I must wear this darned wig."

Andy swung his lightsaber around with matching 'swoosh' sounds. "This is awesome!"

Maddie threw him a glare, "Andy, stop moving."

"Noooooo!" Andy dramatically yelled, falling on his knees. "Nononono!"

Stuart chuckled, he always enjoyed watching this little family. They were like Reed Richards and his family—the kids included. Like a comic book come to life, minus the superheroes. "I'm sure that you're going to win the group part of the costume contest."

Leonard snickered in his Bilbo Baggins costume. "Stuart, they're probably going to be the  _only_  family dressed up for the party."

"He's right about that," Raj grinned, gesturing to his Doctor Strange costume, "but we all know who's going to win the solo costume!" Leonard scoffed and the superhero laughed. "You don't have a chance, Leonard. Like any other group going up against the Coopers—"

"Happy Halloween everyone!" They all turned to see the Wolowitzs enter the store, in costume as Mario and Princess Peach with Harvey as Yoshi. "Ready to lose Coopers?"

Sheldon and Penny shared a look before getting into character. "Oh, it's on."

* * *

**#40 - It Happened, Just Differently**

**2014**

Penny woke up to the sound of Sheldon and the twins whispering and Sheldon clearing his throat. And the voice of Mary and Missy Cooper in the background.

"—three," music started playing and she was sure that it was her old pal, Shania Twain singing along to Sheldon's voice, "looks like we made it, look how far we've come now, Penny. We might have took the long way, we knew we'd get there, someday. They said, I bet, they'll never make it. But, just look at us going on; we're still together, still goin' strong."

She opened an eye and saw Sheldon standing at the foot of their bed—the twins beside him—and the Coopers on video call on his laptop. "You're still the one, I run to, the one that I belong to, you're still the one I want for life. You're still the one that I love, the only one I dream of, still the one I kiss goodnight." He motioned for the twins to get him something and suddenly, a bouquet of tulips appeared. "Happy Valentines, Penny."

"Thank you, sweetie," he handed her the bouquet as she sat up. "Hi Mary, Missy, Meemaw. Happy Valentines to you, and you, too, twins."

Maddie grinned up at her then at Andy, "I told you, daddy was going to sing."

"And you were right!" Her twin chirped, munching on a piece of chocolate. "Uncle Leonard's going to be so happy!"

Penny sighed happily; she loved these people so much. "So, how'd you pick Shania Twain?"

* * *

**#41 - Hostile Takeover**

It was a bright, sunny day when Maddie Cooper saw red.

She had always been a calm, patient three year old that seldom allowed anger to get the best of her. Yes, she often argued with her twin brother, but that was mostly because he did something wrong and she just wanted to make him learn his lesson. And it was fun arguing with him.

But when she saw something  _very_  irksome happening to her brother,

It happened during lunch, when she, Sam and Cassie sat at picnic table at the playground, waiting for her brother to return from the toilet. Their daddy had made them a ham and cheese sandwich, and they promised that they'd share it with their friends so that they could taste their daddy's cooking.

"Andy's taking a while," she grumbled, staring longingly at the plate of sandwiches. "The food's gonna get too cold."

Cassie sighed, like she, also enjoyed eating. "I'm sure that he'll be back soon."

"There he is," Sam pointed towards the outdoor toilets. "Now, we can eat!"

Then, something she only saw happening in the movies Uncle Raj liked to watched, happened—Andy  _tripped_ , slammed into one of the older kids and caused him to drop his lunch tray. "I'm sorry!" Her brother started as he got up, picking up the food that fell. "It was an accident—"

Suddenly, the big kid grabbed her brother by the collar (causing Andy to start tearing up in fear) and  _something_  in Maddie just… snapped.

"You little punk!" The boy (who was almost a head taller than her brother) hissed, lifting Andy up as his other big kid friends gathered around them.

"I'm gonna call the teacher!" Cassie shouted, scurrying to find one while Sam hurried to his friend.

"I'm sorry!" Andy sniffed, "it was an accident—please, let me go!"

Sam felt a wave of relief when Cassie returned with the teachers, then he noticed that Maddie was missing. He turned back to the commotion and gasped as the big kid  _dropped_  Andy; his friend sniffling in pain.

"Hey!" A  _very_  angry voice called, "no one, and I mean,  _no one_  hurts my brother and get away with it!"

And just like that, a yellow blur appeared and shoved the big kid off his feet. Maddie huffed at the terrified kid, "don't ever try to hurt my brother, again." She turned and helped her brother up. "Are you okay?"

Andy nodded, wiping his tears on the sleeves of his blazer as he stood up. "Yeah, I think I hurt my knee, but I'll be fine." He wiped off the dirt form his knees and smiled as of nothing happened. "So where's the sandwiches?"

Both Sam and Cassie (along with everyone else) agreed that Maddie Cooper was someone you didn't mess with. And was super awesome.

* * *

**#42 - And It Went Like This…**

"—though, Charlie, that's Gregg, is a half angel, he is promoted to an archangel regardless of the fact that he had fallen in love with Bailey's character Katie. Once the mission is completed, he returns to Heaven, only watching Katie from a far. I cried at that part.

"Jane, that's me, becomes what she has been in the past ten years after succeeding in the mission. She decides not to return to her old life because she is no longer happy and starts a new one as Jane. She can still see and interact with Charlie who is still her guardian angel. She meets Katie—who forgot about everything that has happened but regains is when they meet again—and discovers that Katie can no longer see nor talk to Charlie even though he is right beside her. It's sad isn't it?

"Then, Charlie asks Jane to tell Katie that he will never love anyone again but it does not mean that Katie cannot love again and he sets her free by erasing her memories of him. The next day Katie meets a guy and falls in love with him and even though Charlie is hurt by this, he accepts it as he believes that he and Katie were never meant to fall in love in the first place! I really cried at this part.

"Jane tells him on Katie's wedding day that Katie told her that she had always felt like there's someone watching over her and that even if she sounds crazy she feels like she loved the person. After this, Charlie spends less time on Earth and focuses on his angel duties, but not without spending some time with Jane every now and then.

"Two years later, Jane meets with a character again and Charlie reveals to her that he had been destined to meet her from the start and that now is the right time for them to finally meet. The series ends with Katie encouraging Jane to say hi and Jane finally seeing the man—and god, Mr. Fleming is such a great writer!"

Raj sniffed as he nodded while Sheldon glanced up at his girlfriend. "And this is set to be aired… when?"

"We don't know, yet." Penny answered, wiping at her tears. "Depends on how long our show will be on air."

"Ah. And what exactly are you talking about?"

"Halfway There's ending! Pay attention, god!"

* * *

**#43 - You Were Worse**

Andy hummed as he and Maddie stared at the visitor sitting on their couch.

"Uncle Raj," Maddie started, eyes still glued to Harvey who was dribbling on his rattle. "Were we ever like Harvey?"

Raj raised an eyebrow and glanced at the three kids. He didn't know how it happened, but he was in charge of babysitting. "Well, yeah. Everyone was like Harvey at one point."

The blondes both looked affronted before turning to each other. "You were probably drooling all the time, Andy."

"No, I wasn't! I remember that it was you who kept drooling!"

"No, I didn't!"

"Yuh-huh!"

"Nuh-uh!"

Raj grinned. It was nice to finally understand what the twins were arguing about.

* * *

**#44 - Twin Patrol**

Sheldon was on his way back from the kitchen when he thought of checking on the twins.

Ever since the twins fully learned how to speak, they no longer required them to check up on them every night. Instead, when they ever needed anything, they would use the baby monitor in their room to call either of them. That thought upset Penny (claiming that they didn't need her anymore) but he assured her that it was nothing.

He quietly opened the door and found Andy crouched beside Maddie who was tossing and turning in his sleep. "Andy, is there something wrong?"

His son turned to him before tiptoeing towards him. "Maddie's having a nightmare, daddy—I don't know what I should do."

Understanding what he was talking about, he lifted Andy and walked over to Maddie's bed. Andy got off and crawled back to his bed while he sat next to Maddie. "It's okay… I'm sure that Goofy won't get you."

In an instant, Maddie awoke and sat up, glancing worriedly around the room. "I had a bad dream," she sleepily said, grabbing her Winnie the Pooh doll and embracing it. "The big kid was picking in Andy… again…"

Andy frowned and walked to his twin's bed, "here," he placed his Woody doll beside her, "you can use this for now. It might help you sleep—I'll be fine for a night."

Sheldon smiled at his son then at Maddie who was drifting back to sleep. "Sweet dreams, princess." He pulled her comforter over her shoulder before moving to Andy's bed. "It seems your sister is still bothered by that bully."

"She is," Andy yawned as he tucked him in, "but, I think she's going to be fine. Woody always helps with bad dreams. So does Mommy. And you." He closed his eyes and was soon fast asleep.

Sheldon slowly got up and exited the room, thinking to himself as he returned to their room. He was going to deal with that kid when he takes the twins to school the next day.

* * *

**#45 - Nine Years, Huh**

Leonard drummed his fingers on the steering wheel as he and Sheldon stared at the building in front of them.

Nine long years wasted…

"I thought that they were demolishing the apartment?" Sheldon shrieked as they observed their old home that hadn't changed in two years. "Why is 2311 Los Robles still 2311 Los Robles?!"

"I don't know. I guess we were duped." They both sighed. "Hey, it's Tuesday—why don't we go to the Cheesecake Factory for old times sake?"

* * *

**#46 - He Can Relate To It**

Leonard held back his tears as Sheldon fixed his bowtie. "Nothing's gonna change, I promise."

"I know."

"You're still my best friend, and we're still going to do our routine and I'll pick you up for work—"

His best man cut him off by patting his shoulder, "I know. Like I'd allow you to break the roommate agreement—which is still effective regardless of the fact that you're no longer my roommate and have your own life now." Leonard sniffled. "Good luck, Leonard."

Leonard smiled. He was going to miss his crazy best friend. "Thanks, buddy. Now, let's get this wedding started."

Raj wiped his tears, "that was so emotional."

Howard snorted, fixing his cuffs, "what? That was like the gayest thing, ever."

Penny snickered, "you're one to talk. Come on, the wedding's about to start."

* * *

**#47 - AU : What if the babysitting never happened?**

"—change the channel right now!"

Sheldon rolled his eyes at his sister's voice and changed the channel. "There. I changed it, now what?"

"Just wait!"

Of course, it was just like Missy to bother him on a  _very_  busy day for something as asinine as watching tv. He didn't know what he was to expect, as the only thing that she said was that what was on tv was going to 'blow his mind.' Right now, there were just commercials. He  _hated_  commercials. "Missy, is this really important? I have other things to do—"

"—so, Penny just won her second Emmy." Sheldon turned his head and saw a guy writing something down a wall of glass before turning to face the other people. "And her dates were her twins."

The screen showed a picture of  _his_  Penny in a gown, standing in between two blonde kids, who were about three years old.

And that's when he saw it. Or them,

"Do ya see them? The two little kids?" Missy asked, a mix of panic and excitement evident in her voice. "Don't ya agree that they look jus' like ya?! Like us?"

That—he… well, yes; those two kids  _did_  look just like they did when they were their age. And yes, his eidetic memory—after years of giving him a vague image—finally reminded him why he vowed to never go near alcohol, again. It wasn't something that he could deny; the scars he got were a proof that it happened. "Yes. They do look like us."

"Shelly, ya' listen to me—if there's somethin' that you ain't sayin' that can explain how this happened, then those kids are yours," Missy hissed in a hush voice, their mother was probably in the next room, through the phone. "And if they really are yours, ya' better go meet 'em,  _now_."

And that was how his and Leonard's—who told him everything after he cornered him in his room—Penny stalking (he was affronted by the term, but he supposed that it fit) started. They tracked down any article about her regarding the twins, watched every show that featured her and even entered a sweepstakes where twenty winners would be allowed to watch a taping of a Halfway There episode.

Eventually, both Raj and Howard got wind of what they were doing and caused them to include them in the stalking. Thanks to Howard—who was proud to say that Bernadette approved of his stalking since she wanted to see her, as well—they discovered Penny's address, which Bernadette said not to use. He also got them tickets to go to a meet and greet for some special Halfway There episode.

Leonard prepared him on what he would say to Penny while Raj and Bernadette tried to help him with how he'd ask Penny to allow him to meet the two kids. Missy even called him just to say that he should keep her updated about her niece and nephew that she was just 'dying' to meet. He didn't pay much attention to his sister and focused on how things would change once he met the kids.

"I'm so excited to meet Bailey Mckenzie!" Raj chirped behind him, the line near the cast's table moving. "She's so gorgeous—and I want to ask her how she got her hair to maintain the shine."

Howard scoffed, "really? That's what you want to ask her?"

Leonard placed a hand on his shoulder as an attempt to calm him down, "hey, are you ready? Penny's at the end. You know what you're going to say right?"

Sheldon nodded and approached the first person at the table (he skipped the supporting characters) who was a grinning man that he didn't care much for. "Hello."

The man grinned up at him as he took the provided autograph book. "Hi! What's your name?"

"Sheldon," he stiffly said, glancing at Penny who was conversing with a fan, "just Sheldon."

"There you go, just Sheldon," the actor laughed as he signed the page and passed it back to him, "say, have we met before? You kinda look familiar."

There might be a chance that they have, but that would be because he and the others stalked him, Penny and the scowling dark haired girl out to dinner once. "I'm afraid not. It looks like I'm holding up the line—thank you for the autograph." The actor smiled up at him before he moved to the scowling actress.

She was picking a new pen when he reached her spot, and he cleared his throat. "Hello."

The dark haired actress glanced up at him and her eyes widened. "Hey, I think I know you."

Of course she knew him, she used to worked at the Cheesecake Factory and apparently served him once. Bernadette prepared him for this just in case of a worse case scenario where Penny didn't want to see him and this girl warns her that he is here and Penny runs away. He was going to say that he was a fan and that he had met her several times now. Lies, but they had to be said. "I'm a… fan. I've took many pictures with you."

She still looked skeptical but shrugged it off. "Okay, then," she signed the page and handed it back to him. "Thanks for being a fan." He took the book and took a deep breath; Penny was up next. He glanced down at the page.

_Barbecue bacon cheeseburger with barbecue, bacon and cheese on the side, right, Mr. Tuesday burger? PS. Penny's gonna love seeing you._

She recognized him, huh. Well, it couldn't be help.

The person in front of him left and Penny wasn't looking at his direction; she was smiling at the fans that were waving at her from the back of the line. This was it—the time to face the reality that Penny was hiding something from him, and that his life was going to change once she realized that he knew about the kids.

He placed the book in a new page and slid it in front of her. "Hello, Penny."

And their eyes met for the first time in four years.

* * *

**#48 - The Last Shade of Orange (Thirteen Years Later Side E)**

Maddie sneezed as Andy blew the dust off the chest that was in their closet. They were currently looking for their dad's old Flash costume that Uncle Raj would use to make Bowser Jr. a costume for his second birthday. "That's really dirty."

"It is—hey, what's this?" He backed up from the chest and handed her two slightly crumpled piece of paper followed by a broken crayon. "This must be something you drew when we were younger—it's so ugly."

She stared at the circle thingies (with orange skin?!) and noticed the name at the bottom. "This is yours, you jerk! It says Andy, see?"

"This is yours!" Andy exclaimed, holding the another drawing to her face. It was a bunch of circles with other tiny circles and 'Det Sath' written beside it. "So ugly!"

"Oh, shut up!" She snapped, grabbing the drawings and shoving it back in the chest. "Just look for the stupid costume—stop laughing!"

* * *

**#49 - Something I Do Want To Remember**

Sheldon stopped typing as the clock on his laptop struck twelve.

He knew what today was, and though it wasn't the exact time that it happened, he wanted to tell Penny as quickly as he could. He swiveled his desk chair around to face the blonde who was reviewing her new script. "Penny, do you know what day it is today?"

She glanced up from her stack of scripts and raised an eyebrow, "no, what day is it today?"

"Two years ago, today, you appeared in front of my doorstep with the twins." He sighed, remembering how he fainted at the sight of them. "I was still very mad at you, then."

"And I wasn't sure if you would be a good dad."

They shared a look before laughing together.

That was certainly one of the most memorable day of their lives.

* * *

**#50 - ?**

Penny sighed to herself as she took another sip of her drink.

This was the third time that Sheldon was too 'busy' to accompany her to a party because he had to keep searching for a next breakthrough in science. Apparently, winning  _two_  Nobels weren't enough for the great Dr. Sheldon Cooper. So, she had to go to this dumb party—that she strongly wished that she didn't RSVPd to—with Bailey who ditched her and a few glasses of various alcoholic drinks.

She didn't even know how many drinks she's had—which was bad, because she promised herself when she had the twins that she wouldn't drink (wine and champagne was an exception) ever again. But alcohol had been her best friend before, she didn't see why it can't comfort her now… which was just her drunkenly trying to justify her drinking.

Look at her, thirty-eight (going thirty-nine in a little over a month) years old and lonely at a party. Screw her Emmy and her Oscars—that didn't do anything to get her husband to accompany her to a stupid party that she only went to prove a point. The problem was; there was no point. She was just hoping that Sheldon would do something very un-Sheldon and come get her. Like how they did in movies and shows.

"Hi, Penny."

She turned—her vision a bit blurry—and saw her costar (what the hell was his name again?!) taking a seat next to her. For some reason, there were rumors that she was cheating on Sheldon and dating this guy that she seriously couldn't remember's name. As her husband says, what a bunch of malarkey. "Oh hey. Wassuuup."

"How are you tonight?" Feeling horribly wasted, that's how she was feeling. Cause you know, what she wanted was to be with her husband but you know, that's what you get when you marry one of the smartest men on earth. Pros and cons. "You okay?"

She glanced up at him and grinned at the thought that popped into her mind. "Yeah, I was just thinking about something. So, how are you?"

Whatever, she was going to have fun tonight; whether Sheldon likes it or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To those of you who enjoy M stories, I have posted a Babysitting oneshot called Just A Little Spontaneity that is set in between #29 and #34. It doesn't reveal much about this story (even though it is set in it) so it can be enjoyed by both the Babysitting aficionados and the non aficionados.


	23. Swan Song

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more filler. :-)
> 
> This is gonna seem rushed and there's going to be a few who are OOC, but meh, time changes people.

Sheldon stared at the silver box that he had received in the mail in confusion, before picking up the card attached to it and started reading it.

"Dear Dr. Cooper, sorry, but, I won't be able to attend your party. I'm currently in Russia, visiting a former physicist that had wanted to collaborate with me. Though I'm not there, please pretend that I am and send my regards to everyone. I'll see you when I get back. Ramona. PS. Martha might be able to attend in my place. XOXO."

How Ramona knew of this party, he'd never know. In all the years that he knew her, she had never shown any signs of being able to sense when someone did something out of their comfort zone. Maybe she had developed some sort of foresight skills throughout the years, and is now able to sense unusual events around her. Like him throwing a party.

He placed the box at the back of the shelf (so that no one else would see it) and sighed; he only had a few days left to get everything ready for his surprise birthday party for Penny.

It had been nearly three years since he and Penny had got together, and for the first time, he wanted to do something special for her. He lacked the creativity to think of something 'memorable' and unique for the blonde's 29th birthday, and so he settled on throwing a party. It seemed easy enough to do on his own and to hide from her.

The problem was; throwing a party was definitely  _not_  as easy as he originally thought, and now he was getting a headache at all of the things that he had to do. There was  _planning_  the party, setting up the party, getting someone to distract her, finding her a gift—because Penny would be even happier if he got her a nice, shiny gift or another color of something she already owned—and the worst part; inviting guests. Which was why he swallowed his pride and asked the others for help.

Raj, Bernadette and Amy were all more than happy to help, but even their presence wasn't enough to avoid problems. Raj kept making things too romantic; Bernadette kept getting mad that Howard never thought of doing it for her while Amy kept nitpicking solely because she wanted everything to be 'perfect' for her bestie. As if he didn't want that, as well. He didn't fly in Penny's family yet, as her mother would just tell her everything. It was already hard enough for him to keep it from her, he didn't need another flight risk.

Howard and Leonard did the tedious task of fetching food (because they get hungry) decorations (they're all busy) and other gopher-like things that no one else bothered to do. His family flew in early—him reasoning to Penny that they wanted to spend Thanksgiving with them and take a week long vacation at the same time—and was in charge of the cooking; since Penny absolutely loved Meemaw's and his mother's, and Missy and George (and their families) just there because they were probably bored.

Then, there were Gregg and Bailey who just sat somewhere in the house and did absolutely nothing. Bailey claiming that if he allowed her to help, he'd be humiliated by her 'greatness' in knowing everything that Penny likes. At last Gregg volunteered to distract Penny while the guests arrived. Eventually (after a long argument) Bailey agreed to be the one to invite guests cause she, "knew people that Penny would like to see."

So far, things were going well with the help.

The only problem was making sure that the twins didn't let anything slip to their mother.

"—you're going to be in a lot of trouble!"

"But, I didn't do anything wrong!"

"You did! You almost ruined the s-e-c-r-e-t!"

"No, I didn't!"

"Yeah, you did!" The footsteps got louder—they were  _fast walking_  because Penny had banned running in the house—and he could tell that they were right outside the living room. "Daddy! Daddy! Andy did something wrong!"

"Don't listen to her, I didn't do anything wrong, I promise!"

There it was; the biggest problem of the twins having a full grasp of the English language and not being able to keep secrets. Well, Maddie could keep a secret—but failed at whispering—and Andy was unable to lie. Like him. He would start getting agitated and would eventually spill the beans. Which was probably what his son almost did.

Maddie made it first to him—Andy catching up after a few seconds—her blue eyes wide and he could already sense a disagreement coming his way. "Daddy, Andy did something  _really_  bad!"

Andy huffed, obviously unhappy that his sister was doing her favorite hobby; tattling on him. "No, I didn't."

"Nuh-uh," snapped his twin sister, making a face that strongly reminded him of Missy when they were younger, "you almost told Mommy the secret!"

Ah, so he was right. The 'secret' was almost exposed three times now; Maddie whispering (saying) "how are we gonna yell surprise?" in the living room while Penny was reading her scripts, Andy acting suspicious when Penny jokingly asked him if he was hiding something and Maddie (again) loudly whispering to Andy, "Mommy better not know about the secret or else Daddy will get mad!"

At the rate things were going, Penny probably already knew about her party.

The Nobel laureate braced himself on his knees to be on eye level with the two five year olds. Looking at them, now, it was like nothing had changed in the three years that had passed. Other than Andy's hair turning into a dark blonde shade and Maddie channeling Missy with the way that she picked on her brother; it was as if they were still the toddlers he first met. "Calm down,  _then_  tell me what happened."

Maddie took a deep breath, then spoke. "Mommy asked us if we wanted to go somewhere on her birthday and Andy—"

"—didn't do anything wrong—"

"—almost said surprise! Then, I distracted Mommy—who must've forgotten it already—and got Andy out before he spilled the secret." She said, shooting a small glare at her brother. "Sur. That's a clue. A  _big_  clue."

Andy scowled—in which he looked  _just_  like him (minus the blonde hair and the green eyes) with the way his lip curled; something Penny often pointed out—at her in response. "I didn't even say the whole word, you know! Daddy, did I do something wrong?"

As long Penny didn't find out, no, not really. "Do you think that you did something wrong?" His son shook his head (Maddie huffing) and he patted his head. "If your mother doesn't know anything, then, I think its alright."

"But, he almost ruined the surprise!" Maddie whined as Andy stuck out his tongue at her. "He said  _sur_ —"

"Who said sur?"

The three of them all froze at the sound of Penny's voice and turned to find her standing at the entrance. "What are the three of you talking about?"

The twins both turned to look at him, panic evident on their faces. If he didn't say anything, there was a big possibility that Andy would accidentally blurt out the secret. "Maddie was asking me if surfing was any fun." He lied, making sure that Penny wouldn't make eye contact with him, or else he'd slip. "Andy said that it didn't look safe, Maddie isn't too happy."

If Penny was suspecting anything, she definitely was good at hiding it. "Oh, okay. Surfing's fun—we should all try it sometime." The three inwardly sighed at the thought that she had bought his lie. "Anyway, I'm here to ask you guys on what you wanna do on my birthday."

"I gotta go visit Bowser—he must be feeling lonely." Maddie (suspiciously) announced, waving goodbye before walking out of the living room.

"And I have to go help her," Andy added, quickly dashing after his twin.

Penny waited for a moment before sitting down beside him, "you know that I can tell that you're hiding something from me, right?" Drat. She already had a hunch. "You've always been terrible at secrets."

He really shouldn't have let the twins into the secret like he originally intended on doing. Curse Raj snd Bernadette for convincing him that the twins would be great at keeping secrets. He should've just based his decision with the way the two nearly ruined their mother's day surprise, two years ago. "I'm not terrible at keeping secrets, I am simply uncomfortable with the notion of it."

"Oh, really? Well, good luck with it," she grinned, leaning back against the couch. "It better be a  _big_  gift if you're going through so much trouble to keep it from me. Now, back to what I was saying; do you wanna go somewhere on my birthday? I'm sure that your family will be fine here. Or they could go with us."

He picked up the remote control,and changed the channel. It would be bad if he accidentally confirmed that there was a surprise for her. One cannot be surprised if one is aware that there is a surprise. That would be stupid. "Wouldn't it be better if we just stay here and go out for dinner? I heard from Amy that there is a fantastic fine dining restaurant she just discovered that you'd love. I'll even wear those itchy suits that you love."

Sheldon glanced at her and was not prepared to see her look so… crestfallen—which made the panic alarm to go off in his head. "Or we could go on a date?"

Penny raised a skeptical eyebrow and turned to him, "a date? Now, I'm  _sure_  that you're hiding something from me." She leaned forward—an excited grin forming on her face—as he backed away from her. "Ooh! What are you planning? Are you taking me shopping? Did you make me one of those hover board thingies that you always talk about? Or…" she placed her hands on his chest and smirked, "do you have something romantic planned for me?"

He swallowed the lump in his throat and felt himself starting to sweat; either from Penny leaning too close or from the strong urge to just tell her about the party. She had always been great at seeing through his lies. "I—do you really have to ruin surprises?"

Her body shook with mirth as she sat back down and patted his shoulder. "I'm never going to get tired of messing with ya, sweetie. So, that's a yes, right? To a surprise?"

"If I say yes, will you stop messing with me?" He asked, inwardly sighing in relief that she was letting it go.

"Yes and no," she shrugged, flashing him a smile, "Yes, cause then I'll finally understand why the twins keep avoiding me and no, cause teasing you is fun. Methinks that you have something really awesome prepared for me. Am I getting a unicorn? Make it three—the twins will want one, too."

Unsurprising. Penny had always had a vivid imagination and silly belief in all things imaginary since the first time they met. Maybe, he could get Howard to build her a robot unicorn as an extra birthday gift. That would definitely surprise her. "Please, unicorns do not exist, Penny. You should know that by now. What I'm getting you is certainly better than any mythical creature."

Sheldon felt her shift beside him, quickly kissing him (and catching him off guard) before standing up. "I'm taking your word for that. This surprise better be amazing—but, since it's you, I'm sure that it'll be even better. I'm off to buy something at the supermarket. I'll be back in a bit!" He silently watched as she skipped out the living room—humming, as she was obviously happy about something—and sighed.

He had to get back to making sure that this party was perfect for Penny.

* * *

"So, what are your plans for Penny?"

The theoretical physicist glanced up at his fellow tenure-slash-best friend and gestured for him to enter his office. There were times like today where he missed his tiny best friend. Ever since Leonard started a relationship with (and he certainly  _did not_  see this coming as he had a feeling that the relationship was doomed) Stephanie—whom he met again through  _Amy,_ who did a set of experiments at her hospital—he had spent less time with him and eventually moved in with her.

Just last year, he and Stephanie got married and he was forced to be the best man. It was  _supposedly_  emotional (that's what Penny said) and somewhat—dare he say it—sad to watch his best friend start a new life on his own. He had gotten so used to having Leonard in his life that it made him a bit upset that he would no longer see his former roommate every. single. day. of his life.

On the bright side, after a year, nothing really changed in their routine. Other than Leonard living in a house  _five_  blocks to the west from their house, he still drove him to and from work (except when Penny felt like driving him) took him to New Comic Book night, played HALO and vintage video games with him. It was mainly because Stephanie worked night shifts—but he appreciated anything that would get Leonard back to their routine.

Sheldon barely lifted his gaze from paperwork and hummed, "well, Gregg and Bailey already invited all of the guests, nearly ninety-three percent have said yes. I've ordered all her favorite food while my mother and Meemaw cooks their specialties—"

"That's not what I meant," his former roommate (rudely) interrupted; sending him a patronizing look.

Of course. Leonard was once again beating around the bush and wasting his precious time. As the newest (and most sought after, if he may say so himself) Nobel laureate, he had a lot of work to do. Publishing a book; doing interviews, disproving others who try to question his discoveries and—the most difficult of them all—publishing another work that would get him another Nobel. If only Smoot had listened to him, he would've gotten another Nobel.

Ever since he had won the Nobel for disapproving Loop Quantum Gravity one year ago; he had been searching through all of his works, trying to see what he could work on next. He had no intentions of teaching nor doing nothing during his tenure—which was either until he retired or died. Which was why he had one gigantic headache bothering him. But, he was sure that soon enough, he'd find his next Nobel worthy work. "Then, what did you mean? If you want to suggest something, I suggest that you say it now. We don't have time to add every single thing we come up with."

"I told you, that's not what I meant. I was talking about you and Penny's relationship."

He cocked an eyebrow and shoved the folder he was holding into his drawer. "Oh, this talk again." He pulled another folder from his 'to read' case and placed it in front of him. "And what is it you want to know about?"

Leonard shifted in his seat, "you've probably heard this from Raj, but, haven't you ever thought of proposing to Penny?"

"Why would I do that when our relationship has been perfectly fine without me having to propose all these years?"

"Well, it would mean a lot to her," the experimental physicist said, causing him to glance up. "You know, Bernadette told me that every girl wants to get married at one point in their life." Ah, the whimsical jibber-jabber called 'gossip' that the women of their social group had always peeved him. He and Amy once did an experiment regarding rumors which led to Penny yelling and slamming their bedroom door in his face.

"And I assume that that isn't the only thing she said," he peered over the folder he was reading and saw Leonard sending him a troubled expression, "am I right?"

Leonard sighed, picking up his nameplate and examining it. "It was actually  _Raj_  who told me this, but he said that Amy said that Bernadette said that Penny said that she's been thinking about marriage. Like when she'll get married or something like that."

He shook his head as he clucked his tongue in distaste. "Leonard, you know how much I detest gossip. Is there even a point to this?"

"Haven't you ever thought about it?"

"Of course, I have!" Sheldon snapped, feeling a vein throb at his temple. "I've thought about it from the moment that I discovered about the twins' true identity. I ponder its merit whenever I see those asinine reporters harassing her on when we would get married! It's not as easy as it look, Leonard."

It was never as easy as it looked. He couldn't just go and ask her to marry him. He never even planned on  _ever_  having a relationship, before. He did everything regarding relationships on impulse—he didn't think it through like he always did. He just followed his instincts (which was so unlike him) and did what felt right. How was he supposed to just get married when everything in their relationship has been one big roll of the dice?

His former roommate grew silent for a moment, thinking to himself, before placing his nameplate back at the front of his desk. "You're afraid that something might change if you get married."

He looked away. "Everything has been perfectly fine. Why change it?"

"Sheldon, I have one last question for you; do you love Penny?

What an extremely idiotic question! Of course he did! Would he go through so much if he didn't? Surely the past three years of them being together was enough evidence for that. They've been sleeping in the same bed (cue dramatic gasps stemmed from his personal space) for nearly two years now—something he would never  _ever_  do if he didn't love her and wanted to make her happy.

The him from three and a half years ago would have obliterated him, but as his mother says; times' a changin'.

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"It would make Penny really happy. It's what she's been waiting for all this time."

…

Sheldon quietly closed the folder he was holding and stood, "let's go. We have a diamond to find, and Howard to ask help from. I know  _exactly_  what I want."

* * *

It was around nine forty in the morning when Penny woke up.

She slowly sat up, yawned and stretched her body before she fully took in her surroundings. There was no lanky physicist with homemade breakfast in bed (her favorite) or twins sitting by her feet, waiting for her to wake up or Amy—this scenario had a big chance of happening if Sheldon wanted to distract her—sitting on the armchair at the corner of her room or her parents staring down at her before crying cause it was her birthday.

Where the hell was the 'happy birthday' committee?

Grabbing her phone from her nightstand, she found literally  _zero_  text messages. Not. Even. A. Single. Goddamn. Message. She went to the bathroom to freshen up, wrapped a robe around her body and exited her room, heading straight to the twins' bedroom. Empty. Then to the vacant rooms where her family was staying. Empty. She stepped out the balcony to see if there was any sign of life at the guesthouse. Empty.

If this went on any longer, this was going to be the worst birthday of her life. Seriously.

The only member of her household that greeted her was their dog, Bowser, who she ran into in the hallway. The little (huge) monster happily trampled on her—thank goodness, Sheldon made sure that their dog was as hygienic as he was—and licked her cheeks like he always did. She should probably give him more snacks as a reward for being the only one to say happy birthday to her.

Suddenly, she felt her phone ding in her pocket and saw that someone (finally) finally her happy birthday. It was good ol' Mr. Fleming—the awesomest director on the face of the planet. That was why she loved him so much! Because of this, she promised that she would never be late to another taping, again. Sending him a quick 'thank you' she descended the stairs and found half of the house… empty.

"What the heck is wrong with everyone?" She grumpily muttered, throwing a glare at the front door that didn't seem like it had just been used. With the twins being so tall for their age, she had developed the skill of knowing whether or not someone used a door. She hadn't proven it, but it also hadn't been disproven, yet, so win win.

She trudged towards the kitchen and found Sheldon cooking something at the stove. Finally! Some sort of proof that she hadn't been accidentally abducted by aliens for testing. Had she not seen her whack-a-doodle, she would probably spend her next birthday at an asylum or something. Expectations not being met can really make a person go crazy.

Probably sensing her presence, Sheldon glanced over his shoulder. "Good morning, Penny."

Oh, now he remembers her. She was expecting some sort of birthday package with breakfast in bed and hugs and kisses—but, nothing. She didn't even get flowers. "Good morning." She coldly said, lacking any affection she used for him as she waited for him to stop the 'I forgot that it's your birthday' act and finally greet her.

After a full minute, Sheldon didn't greet her and she almost threw a stool at the back of his giant head. How the hell was it possible for him to forget her birthday?! Didn't he have that stupid eidetic memory that remembered everything from his first day at school to what she said to him when they saw each other again?! What the heck was the perk of having a genius for a boyfriend if he didn't remember her birthday?

"Mommy," she saw Andy tugging on her sleeve and hoped that either of her five year old twins would be the first to greet her. "Could you please go to the dining room? Daddy doesn't want to be disturbed."

Maddie nodded beside him, "Daddy specifically said that he didn't want anyone in the kitchen. We can't disrupt him or else."

The oldest blonde sighed in defeat and allowed the twins to each take her hand and drag her towards the living room. Really, what was the point of having three geniuses when they didn't even remember that it was her birthday? Maybe, everyone forgot about her birthday this year. Or it wasn't really her birthday—unlikely, as she checked her phone, but she just wanted a logical explanation for this.

She shook herself out of her thoughts as they reached the living room and she saw nearly  _everyone_  there. There was Leonard; Raj, Amy, Howard, Bernadette, their son, Harvey, Mary, Meemaw, Missy and her husband, Junior and his family, her dad, her mom, her sister and her family, Gregg and even Bailey.

"Happy birthday, Penny!"

"Why are all of you here?!" She squawked, both happy and confused that they were here.

Bailey snorted, "well, that didn't end well."

"Not helping, Bailes." Gregg threw a glare at her before smiling at Penny, "you know, we just wanted to see your face when you think that we didn't remember."

Amy nodded in agreement, "I must say, bestie, even with that look of perplexity, you still look astonishing!"

"Did you really think that we'd forget about your birthday, Penn?" Her sister, Barbara asked with a smile, their dad chuckling beside her. "I don't think that any of us would forget about that."

Missy walked over to her and grinned, "especially with the way Shelly kept reminding us of yer birthday—it's like yer birthday's the only thing important."

"Yes, please stop embarrassing me, Missy," Sheldon said, sighing as he appeared behind her. "I'm sorry it isn't breakfast in bed like you probably hoped, but there are too many of us to stay in our room. That would lead to claustrophobia."

"Ah! And I thought you had a big surprise party waiting for me," she joked, taking a seat at the table.

Meemaw's eyes widened and she turned to look at her grandson. "Moonpie, isn't the surprise for dear Penny later this evening?"

Everyone groaned and Meemaw (barely understanding what she said) simply chuckled once she realized that she had ruined the surprise.

Penny eyed the tray he was holding and saw a delicious looking plate of omelettes that was just waiting to be devoured. "Hey, why did you make an omelette?" She asked, noticing that it wasn't the day for omelettes. "It's french toast day, if you're forgetting."

Sheldon placed the tray down on the table and grabbed something from his pocket before standing in front of her. "I know, but, you once said that if I kept making omelettes, you would marry me."

It took half a minute for her to process what he said—their guests suddenly bringing out their phones. "I had originally thought of doing this later on at the party, but I do not do well with crowds. It took Howard and I two whole days to create this and I hope you understand the symbol I used." He opened the box and revealed a ring that was in the shape of the violet light from the Green Lantern that was encrusted with diamonds. "Do you recognize it?"

She nodded, blinking at the beautiful piece of jewelry. "It's the violet light that represents love."

Sheldon smiled softly, bending down on one knee—and  _ohmygodohmygod_  this was really happening. "Penny, I love you. Will you marry me?"

Penny stared long and hard at the ring and the man holding it up as the tears started flowing from her eyes. "Of course, I'll marry you!" He slid the ring on her finger before pulling her in for a tight embrace while everyone cheered.

This was definitely the  _best_  birthday ever.

* * *

**2025**

* * *

Penny took in a deep breath as Sheldon paced back and forth in front of her, acting just as restless as she was.

"If you would just listen to me—"

"What's to listen to, Penny?" Her husband snapped, his eyes bloodshot—an obvious sign that he had not been sleeping since the story of her having an affair with her costar broke. "I saw the pictures! Don't lie to me!"

She hissed as she held back her tears. Why did he have to be so stubborn? She already apologized for her mistake! "I'm telling you, Sheldon, it was one kiss and I was drunk! It had been such a long time since I drank that I wasn't as good as I used to be… If you had just gone with me—"

"Oh, so now you're blaming me?!" She met his gaze and noticed that his usual bright blue eyes had become dark and stormy with rage. "Penny, I couldn't go because of work—why is it so hard for you to understand that?"

Of course! It was  _always_  work first. Ever since he won the Nobel for proving his multiple worlds theory, he had started working nonstop on trying to win a third Nobel so that "he would stay on top of his game." As If two Nobel awards weren't enough. He was so 'busy' that he no longer had time for her. She nearly begged just so that he would forget his work for a day and become her date for the Oscars. She won that night.

She didn't (and would probably never) understand his obsession with trying to get another Nobel. Without the Nobel, he was already regarded as the Rockstar of Science. With the second, he was deemed as the greatest mind of the century—imagine what that would make him if he won another one. Maybe he would finally snap and go crazy like everyone had said he'd do. The only thing she wanted was for him to prioritize something other than work for the first time in a year. "And why is it so hard for you to understand that you're overreacting?!"

"You think I'm overreacting?!" He asked with incredulity in his voice. "I'll show you overreacting." He stomped out of their room and nearly slammed the door; the intensity of it evident in how the floor trembled a little.

She stared at the door for a moment before collapsing into tears.

If she could just jump back in time and fix everything—

—then, she wouldn't be such a mess right now.

* * *

**2015**

* * *

"When I first saw Penny, I honestly thought that we were going to have kids that were beautiful and smart. I really fell in love with her at first sight." Leonard started, causing several of the guests to chuckle. "Sheldon thought she was annoying at first, but they slowly became friends… then, the twins came and that's how the magic started."

Maddie turned to her brother with a look of confusion. "What magic?"

Andy shrugged, "I didn't know that Daddy believed in magic."

Stuart quietly took a bite of cake, "this a wonderful wedding."

Amy blew her nose and passed her box of tissues to Raj who was always crying. "I can't believe that my bestie's married to my male bestie—my old self would be so proud of me!"

"I know! Who would've thought that it would be Sheldon who marries Penny?" The astrophysicist sniffed before passing the box to Bernadette who was also crying. "To think that Sheldon got all of this done in a few weeks—" she smacked Howard, who was holding their son, Harvey, then passed the box two him. "You should get a few tips from him!"

Howard rolled his eyes at his wife and looked down at their son. "I'm telling you, Harvey, pick 'em well." The toddler giggled before his grandmother took him. "Honestly Howard! Saying such things about my lovely Bernadette!" Mrs. Wolowitz (the first one) hissed, carrying Harvey with one arm and grabbing a handful of tissues with the other. "This is such a beautiful wedding! You should really learn a thing or two from him."

Wyatt slumped on his chair as Leonard continued his speech, his wife patting his shoulder. "Aww honey, don't look so down. Sheldon's a great guy."

The Nebraskan huffed, glancing at the newlyweds, "I know. I just don't understand why that Collin guy's here."

Mary eyed her glass of wine, "I was thinkin' the same. But I guess that he's friends with Penny."

"Now, now," Meemaw interjected, "he's just a guest. All's well that ends well and Moonpie's married, now." Missy and Barbara both shrugged, and clinked their glasses.

"I think Penny's dad hates me," Collin admitted, catching the glare that the aforementioned man sent him. "He's been glaring at me since the start of the reception."

Bailey calmly took a sip of wine, "of course he does. You were a detour from the happy ending that they wanted. It's understandable."

The auburn haired man sighed, "but that was three years ago! I'm  _engaged_ , remember?"

Gregg chuckled, grabbing their table's bottle of wine and pouring Collin another glass. "Hey, cheer up. We're at a fabulous party with unlimited wine! Just sit back, relax and laugh at all the stories about the lovebirds!"

Sheldon furrowed his eyebrows and tapped his wife's shoulder. "Penny, I believe we should stop bringing in wine."

The blonde raised an eyebrow, "why? What's wrong?" She followed the direction that his finger was pointing at and saw Ramona and Martha probable drunk at the Caltech table. They watched as President Siebert and Dr. Gablehauser took the wine bottles away from them while Kripke took pictures. "Oh. They seem to be having fun."

"I wonder why they're drinking so much," he asked in confusion, frowning slightly at the sight of his two friends. "Amy told me that people drink when they're sad. It makes me curious on what they're sad about. Social protocol."

Penny chuckled softly, having a hunch on why the two were upset. "You shouldn't meddle with other people's business you know, it's not nice." She grinned up at him and he shrugged.

"—and now look at them," Leonard sniffed, removing his glasses to wipe his tears. "They're married and can't be any happier! To Sheldon and Penny!"

"To Sheldon and Penny!"

Andy and Maddie—imitating what the adults were doing—clinked their glasses of milk together and smiled. "To Mommy and Daddy!"

The host ushered Leonard off the stage and walked up to the mic. "Thank you, Dr. Hofstadter. Now, if we may call on the newlyweds for their first dance."

A wide grin spread across Penny's face as she tugged on Sheldon's arm. "Come on, Dr. Cooper—Mrs. Cooper wants to dance with you."

"Why would my mother—" she sent him a  _look_  and he realized who she was talking about, "oh! Alright. I don't dance, but, just this once." He stood up and was quickly pulled on to the middle of the dance floor.

Sheldon listened closely to the lyrics and instantly recognized the song. "Isn't this that Shania Twain song that you wanted to play on your wedding—From this Moment, was it?"

Penny smirked, "isn't this my wedding?"

"It's my wedding as well," he pointed out, ignoring the confusing gestures that Howard and Leonard were making. "I trust that you are happy?"

"Would I be dancing with you if I wasn't?" They both chuckled as the guests started . "Sheldon, did I already tell you that I love you?"

"You have."

"Well, I'm gonna say it again. I love you, Sheldon."

Sheldon smiled warmly at her as she rested her head on his shoulder. "I love you, too, Penny."

* * *

**2025**

* * *

"What are you doing, Andy?"

The teenager jumped at his twin's voice, quickly detaching himself from the wall and leading her down the stairs. "Shh! You might have exposed me!"

Maddie placed her hands on her hips and scowled, "if you weren't acting all suspicious outside mom and dad's door, I wouldn't have called you out. What the heck were you doing?"

"I was listening to their argument," he admitted with a small sigh, walking with her to the living room. "They were fighting over the scandal thing. It's getting worse."

Maddie was about to say something when there was a loud slam of the door that came from the second floor. "It  _does_  seem like it's getting worse. Ah. Dad just went out of the house—he's probably heading to the comic book store or Uncle Leonard's. He always does that when he wants to blow off some steam."

Andy grabbed the Xbox controller and handed it to his twin, "why do you look so calm? Shouldn't we be alarmed that our parents are fighting? This is a  _serious_  situation, sis. They could get divorce and—well, thats the worst possible scenario actually."

"Of course, I'm worried!" She snapped, killing his character with a press of a button. "I'm worried that the rumors of our parents getting divorced is true! But, someone needs to stay calm through all this, and that person's going to be  _me_."

Great, now his sister was crying. It had been like this for a month and a half now, ever since their mom attended that party for that movie that he didn't really care for. Apparently—based on those rumor shows that Uncle Raj loved to hate—their mom went to the party, drank and (there were photos of this) kissed that movie actor guy.

Did he and Maddie believe it? They didn't, but there was nothing they could do about the photo. They were too afraid to tell their mom that they knew, let alone ask if it was true, and none of their aunts and uncles dared to tell them anything. As if it was a giant secret that they wouldn't be able to handle it.

It affected them, yes, but they did everything that they could to pretend that it didn't. Maddie kept training for her tennis tournament and he focused on his acting. And whenever they had free time, they plotted on ways to get their parents to make up—especially with their tenth wedding anniversary coming up.

"Oh my god, sis, why are you crying?!" Andy gasped, panic rising in his throat. He paused the game and turned to face his sobbing sister. He hated it when his sister cried because she was normally all tough and nonchalant and now she was crying and he was panicking! "Hey, you know that I'm not good tears… how 'bout I buy you ice cream or something? Please, stop crying."

Watery blue eyes suddenly turned hostile and he immediately backed all the way to the end of the couch. She was going to kill him. "I'm not crying!" She corrected as she quickly wiped her (non existing—according to her) tears on her sleeve. "I just had something in my eye. Oh, and you're still going to buy me ice cream."

Yeah right. He'd never understand why his twin was so stubborn. "Yeah, yeah, as long as you stop crying. We have to listen to Uncle Gregg and stay resolute in our goal of fixing this ourselves. I already have a plan, and you know what you're supposed to do."

Maddie grumbled something—looking as if she hadn't just cried like a baby—as she scratched Bowser Jr.'s chin. Ever since their Labradoodle Bowser died (which was around the time that the 'rumor' started) his twin had focused on only sports and Bowser's son, Bowser Jr. It was probably her way of taking her mind off of things. "Yeah, I know. But, what does me winning the tournament have to do with your plan?"

"It's actually Uncle Raj who planned this," he corrected, scooting as Bowser Jr. climbed up their dad's spot. "But when you win, mom and dad will have to congratulate each other for making such an athletic child! Or they'll be so happy that they're just bound to hug. It's genius, isn't it?"

"It's not like we have any other options, so, I'm not gonna say anything till I see results." She shrugged, grabbing her control and starting the game. "What's your first step?"

Andy grinned, visualizing every possible outcome that his plan would have. It was going to take a bit more of pretending to be alright and their parents' relationship deteriorating, but if his plan was executed well, things were going to be alright. "We start with dad, of course."

* * *

**Present**

* * *

Fifteen days. That was how much time had passed since they had last seen their parents talking casually with each other.

It wasn't that they argued each time the saw one another—which, they were happy to say that it  _wasn't_  the case—but it wasn't as if there were rainbows and butterflies whenever they were in the same room. No, all they did was say hi before completely ignoring each other. in. the. same. house.

"Well,  _bother_ , I don't see your plan working." Andy looked over his shoulder to see his twin sister walking towards him; her racket on her shoulder and a scowl on her face. "I'm next. After my win, we are going to pack up and your month long scheming will be in vain."

"You're mocking me," he grumbled, handing her a bottle of water. "If my memory serves me right—and it does—just twelve minutes ago, you were nervous that you wouldn't win!"

Maddie rolled her eyes, "that was twelve minutes ago. Besides, I was actually worried that dad wasn't going to come. If he didn't, your plan would fail. Good thing that I already have a backup plan!"

"For what? In case you lose—ow!" Andy rubbed the spot where his twin had hit him and scowled. "Violence, Maddie, violence! It's no wonder you have no friends."

"I'm going to win," she hissed, "and I have friends! There's Harvey; Bruce, Sarah, Luke, Leia, Connor, Summer and Natalie. That's eight, Mr. I'm-so-popular!"

The problem with Maddie was that she never really cared about having friends at school. Harvey, Bruce and Sarah were Uncle Howard and Aunt Bernadette's kids; Luke and Leia were Uncle Leonard's, Connor was Aunt Amy's and Summer and Natalie were Uncle Raj's. None of them were their age. "You're forgetting about Jamie, Alex and Daisy from cheerleading; Sophie, Roy, Candice and Flint from advanced calculus, Cassie and Sam—who have been our friends since kindergarten!—and practically everyone that considers you as their friend."

His twin waved her hand dismissively; her insouciance for relationships showing. "I remember them, but it doesn't necessarily mean that they're my friends. Just cause you're friends with everyone doesn't give you the right to rub it in. Now, tell me your plan. Mom and dad still aren't talking."

Someday, his twin's lack of patience was really going to stir up some trouble. That, and her rash nature. "Scenario A; you win, they experience parental pride, we have a party at our house and they make up. Scenario B; you win, they get so happy that they forget that they're mad at each other and everyone's happy! Or the more pessimistic scenario; you lose and they bond as they console you. This really depends on you."

And he wasn't lying; the outcome really did depend on her. Somehow, they had miraculously convinced their father to make an effort to fix things—with the help of their three fairy godmothers; Uncles Raj, Leonard and Howard. The two of them were in charge of paving a way for them to interact while the three of them were in charge of getting their father to make it up to their mom.

Not that it was entirely their father's fault—they just knew that everything would be resolved if it was him who approached her. Which was exactly what Uncle Leonard had been working on the entire month; getting their father to stop being so stubborn. At the rate things were going, it looked like things were going as planned.

Uncle Raj even said that their father had something  _big_  planned for it. He just hoped that he was right.

"Just make sure that your plan works," she sighed, seeing her assistant calling for her to come out, "or else our big surprise for their anniversary is going to be a waste."

"Isn't  _this_  our surprise?" Andy gestured around them, "you know, our plan of getting them back together?"

Maddie gave him a sad smile, "that's exactly it. There isn't going to be an anniversary if there's no couple, bother. Just like the time when dad was still… hmm, I can't seem to remember what country mom said that dad was when we were babies. It's odd to think that there was a time before dad was with us."

He couldn't remember much of those days (apparently their eidetic memories only kicked in when they were two) that his twin was talking about and only knew that there had been a time that their dad wasn't with them. It must have been sad. "Hey, you go win the game and I promise that our surprise won't get ruined, sis."

"Oh, I'm going to win, alright, and our plan's going to be successful." She proudly declared, "then you're going to treat me and  _all_  of my friends to the all you can eat ice cream buffet at Scryer's."

"And I'll get to say I told you so," Andy chuckled as his twin walked into the court. There was no way that they would fail now.

* * *

Leonard, Howard, Raj and the twins all stared at each other as the party continued on in the backyard.

"Where did we miscalculate things?" Howard muttered, shaking his head at their giant mistake.

Raj shrugged, swallowing his mouthful of spaghetti. "I honestly don't know, dude. We did the math correctly. There was no way that this could have happened."

"Oh, will you two stop it!" The experimental physicist snapped, "instead of whining, we should think of how to work around this problem. The twins have already done enough."

Andy winced at their godfather's words, thinking back at their tiny miscalculation that they overlooked. It wasn't Maddie's success rate that they didn't predict correctly—she won the game without a single bead of sweat—it was the assumption that their mom and dad would bond over parental pride and somehow kiss and make up.

They didn't even glanced at each other.

Now they were back at their house for Maddie's party, and were brainstorming on how to fix the little blunder. It had been wishful thinking that things would be  _that_  easy. As Uncle Howard said; "when it comes to Sheldon and Penny, it's never easy." He was right in every way and they now had to rethink their plan before they lost the chance. "It's alright, Uncle Leonard, Maddie and I can think of something. We're not giving up just yet."

The Juniors Tennis champion nodded in agreement, "I'm sure that there's something else we can do. Our parents may be stubborn, but we're even more stubborn."

"Yeah! We don't take no for an answer!" Raj chirped, scanning the Coopers' backyard to see where his daughters ran off to. "We're the C-Men!"

Howard threw his best friend a glare, "there are children, here, Raj! But, yeah he's right. We're five geniuses—surely we can think of a way around this. Or else all of our hard work—and laser mishaps—would be in vain! I did not get singed for nothing—"

"What are the five of you talking about?"

Said five geniuses jumped at the alpha genius' voice, causing them to turn around to see Sheldon's famous scowl of distaste.

"S-sheldon! Hi!" Leonard (suspiciously) said, sending his best friend a grin that just screamed 'we're hiding something!' "We were just talking about how great Maddie was at tennis. Isn't she remarkable, buddy?"

Sheldon raised an eyebrow, glancing over to his son who was staring at his shoes and his daughter who avoided eye contact. "Yes, I am aware of that. I was there. Now, what are the five of you whispering about?"

No one answered.

Fine, if they thought that they could get away with (obvious) suspicious behavior, then they were wrong. "Andy." His son visibly winced, muttering something under his breath. "Were you talking about my and your mother's relationship?"

The teenager sighed—thank goodness for his inability to lie—and rubbed the back of his neck. "We were. But, it was nothing—"

"Were you talking about how your mother and I didn't interact when your sister won?"

"Yes. We're sorry, dad." Ah, so he was right about the five of them scheming to get him and Penny back together. He originally thought that it was Amy, Bernadette, Gregg (Bailey probably didn't care) or their families who was plotting something, but something about the way that Andy spoke told him that it was Raj who was behind these. Friends; they were amusing to have. "Please, don't be mad."

"Why would I be mad?" Sheldon asked in confusion as his three friends sent him looks of incredulity. "Granted, I am not happy that the five of you were scheming behind my back when I already approached  _three_  of you," his colleagues all looked away from him, "but I see no reason for me to get mad. Especially, as I've had a plan of my own this whole time."

"A plan?" The twins asked in unison since the three already knew this.

"A plan, yes." He had started his plan when Raj—who was probably working with his progeny—made him realize that Penny was truly sorry and did not intend for that… ill event to happen. Right then and there, he wanted to apologize to his wife, but when she was angry, she was angry. Soon, a month passed and things became rocky between them.

And that was when he thought of his second plan—proposing to Penny, again.

He had allowed this to go on long enough—it had been thirty-two days since the news broke and he was foolish enough to let his anger take over him. Bailey (of all people) told him that Penny was telling the truth, as she was at the party with her, and was the one to explain everything to him. Which made him realize that he had overreacted and made him think of how he was going to make it up to her—before it was too late.

Admittedly, it was Raj's idea, but he could not deny the fact that it was the most reasonable among all of their suggestions—i.e. his mother saying that he should take her to her prayer circle. Their tenth wedding anniversary was just a few weeks away and it would be repetitive to propose on her birthday. In the end, he chose today as he was confident that Maddie would win the title. Double celebrations were easy to do.

He wasn't a hundred percent sure that his plan would work, but it was worth a shot. You can't get results until you do an experiment, and Penny would kill him if he didn't act soon. He made a giant mistake (of doubting her) and it was time to fix it. There was  _no way_  that he was going to lose Penny. "It's not entirely foolproof, however, I strongly believe that this is the only way to win your mother back."

"By saying that you were wrong and stupid then professing your undying love for her?" Maddie guessed, eyebrows slightly furrowed.

"For some reason, it sounds a bit cliche coming from you, but yes, you are correct." He stuck his hand in his pocket and grasped onto the box that held the ring. "The only way that she'll forgive me is if I do something I'd never do. That's something I'm fine with doing."

The twins shared a look of surprise snd confusion before turning back to him. "You should've told us sooner, dad," Andy said, shaking his head at him, "then we would've been able to help."

No, if he had told the twins, Andy would've avoided their mother for the entire duration of this plan and Maddie would have blurted it out at one point. They were his children; they, too, couldn't keep secrets. "But that would certainly ruin the surprise wouldn't it?"

The two blondes hummed in agreement as Penny walked out to the backyard, carrying a platter of cookies and placing it at the picnic table. "I have to get something inside—wait here."

Penny watched Sheldon enter the house and felt Bailey scoffing beside her. "And what are you laughing about, o' jolly one?"

The dark haired actress sniggered rather cynically as she grabbed a cookie from the platter. "I don't know. Something about Dr. Genius is off, can't you tell?"

Sadly, she couldn't tell. She didn't want to admit it, but their relationship was currently rocky and she had no clue on what to do. Mary had said the same thing she always tell her regarding her son; he was like a baby deer—you had to let  _him_  come to you. But, it had already been two months and still nothing and all she could do was wait.

"I agree with Bailey, bestie," Amy said, taking a sip from her glass, "Sheldon's acting awfully suspicious and I'm sure that it has something to do with you."

Bernadette nodded beside her, "they're right. I overheard Howie talking to Sheldon the other night and I heard your name come up a couple times. He's probably going to make it up to you!"

"How romantic!" Gregg—who appeared out of nowhere—chirped. "I like the thought of Sheldon publicly professing his love to you. There's about thirty people here—more than enough people to trample him. He was able to do it before."

As if. It took five hours of her prepping him for his Nobel speech (which he didn't fail at including her and the twins) just to avoid him passing out. Then, during his second Nobel speech, the guys were there with him and he didn't have to speak the entire time. She doubted that he'd be able to do something like that here—with there being a handful of guests that he was less than acquaintances with.

"He fainted after his speech," the actress revealed with a sigh, "and he fainted after the second Nobel win. I doubt that he'd do anything like that—"

"Everyone!" Andy called, standing beside Maddie on the steps, "may we have your attention, please?"

The five friends shared a look before moving over to where the twins stood. "Twins, what are you doing?" Penny asked, ignoring the 'be patient, Mom' look that Maddie was sending her. Leonard, Howard and Raj grinning like mad men. They must have something to do with this.

"Dad has something to say," Maddie explained as Sheldon appeared beside her. "Don't you dad?"

Her husband nodded—looking a bit unsure—and stepped forward. "I do. First things first, Penny—I'm sorry for overreacting. It was wrong of me to not hear you out and I regret making you feel as if I was mad at you. Well, I was, but that didn't last long—"

Maddie coughed as she nudged him, "I was stupid."

"—and I was stupid. Very stupid. Only a fool wouldn't hear you out and think that that you were," he hesitated, his usual serious face getting replaced by remorse, "cheating on me." Several guests gasped—including a dramatic one from Gregg and a mocking one from Bailey—and Penny simply turned away from his pleading gaze. "But, I was wrong about my assumption and I ruined our relationship."

"Get to the point, dad," Andy said through his uncomfortable grin. "We don't have all day."

"What I want to say," Sheldon continued as he threw their son a glare, "is that I'm begging for you forgive me." He descended down the steps and stood in front of her, "Penny, before I met you, I never once thought of entering any type of romantic relationship."

Bailey snorted, "isn't that a bit too cliche for this?"

Amy hummed, "I think it's rather romantic."

Bernadette nodded, "Howie would've wrote a song, but Sheldon's doing well. He could use a movie line or two."

Gregg shrugged, loudly biting down on an apple. "Oh, let him be. These things need a bit of cheese, anyway."

"It never even occurred to me that I'd—one day—understand what it meant to love someone. As a famous movie once said, love is never having to say you're sorry—"

Raj pulled his handkerchief out and sniffed, "A Love Story. I taught him that."

Howard raised an eyebrow, "what? Making movie references during speeches?"

Leonard chuckled, placing an arm on each of their shoulders, "as long as it works, what's the problem?"

"—but, in this instance; love means accepting your faults, apologizing and making sure that you never hurt her again. Penny, this past month has been a whirlwind of false accusations and wrong decisions that I admit that I did. And this entire time, I've been trying to think of ways that I can correct my mistakes."

"How are you going to do that?" Penny curiously asked; hoping that this was him finally approaching her.

Sheldon blinked down at her before sighing, "there isn't a way. The writ has been done— _alea iacta est_ ; the die has been cast. The only thing I can do now is to somehow convince you to give me a second chance—" he took a step closer to her and pulled a ring that looked like a diamond studded Green Lantern ring. "If you recall, the ring I gave you when I first proposed was the the Violet Lantern of the Emotional Electromagnetic Spectrum which represented love.

"Only those who are capable of great love are capable of wielding it and I chose it as it represented me perfectly. This ring is in the shape of the Blue Lantern which symbolizes hope—hope that you will take me back. Hope that it isn't too late for us and for me." He gave the ring a small smile before bending down on one knee, "Penny,

I don't believe in destiny, nor fate or magic, and many other things, but I  _know_  that I love you, and I'm hoping that you still loved me, too."

She watched as he extended her hand out to him and could already feel the tears coming. She was never going to get sick of him proposing to her. "It's been nearly ten years, but—Penny, will you marry me, again?"

"Of course, I will, you whackadoodle." He smiled up at her before sliding the ring on her finger and pulling her in for a tight hug. There was never going to be a time that she'd say no to him.

Andy smiled as he and Maddie watched their parents reconcile. "I should've thought of this plan, sooner. It would definitely had saved us more time."

Maddie scoffed, "only dad can think of something as bizarre—yet, brilliantly effective—as this. You still have a lot to learn, brother."

Raj happily clapped along with Leonard and Howard as he approached the happy couple, stepping in between them and placing an arm on each of their shoulders. "Guys, this definitely calls for a party!"

"A party?" Penny repeated, her smile unwavering from her face.

"Yes, a party!" The astrophysicist grinned, "a flashback party! Remember when this all started with you dropping the twins off at Sheldon and Leonard's because you had to go to France?"

* * *

**Fin**

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And… it's over.
> 
> Wow, seven whole months of working on this fic has passed and now we've reached the conclusion. Two years and seven months finally finished. I think I'm going to cry—nope, I already am. And sorry for the crappily delivered kinda rushed ending—I had originally intended to have a few more chapters where they divorce, but that would make the story too long when it's already long enough. It was either this or them not reconciling and eventually breaking up, but I wanted a happy ending cause we gotta stay happy!
> 
> Oh and feel free to PM me if you have any questions regarding the ending.
> 
> Anyway, I'd like to this opportunity to thank every single one of you who stuck with me; reviewer or not. I really wouldn't have been able to finish this fic if it weren't for you guys. So, you should give yourselves a round of applause for sticking with me and this 300,000 word story! That's one hell of a read.
> 
> Special thanks to; Fangirl308, Shenny Fan / ses1515, Readytolive, Snixiton, Johsel, Aussie SciFi Tragic, Bazingabot, nertooold54, Nebuleste, don't call me surely, xDontInsultTheEdgex, magneto acolyte and Dash Forward who all gave me both a helping hand and the motivational PMs that strived to finish this fic. You guys rock!
> 
> I plan on taking a short break (a month or two) to work on my next fic (M) which is the story I was talking about in my defunct story, The Magnitude of Gravity—whose name I might take for this new one. I'm also going to post a few oneshots while I work on my story. Gotta keep writing!
> 
> So, once again, thank you to everyone who as even so much as glanced at this story. Stories are nothing without readers. :-D
> 
> Happy holidays,
> 
> thisisonlineright


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